A/N: (´・ω・) H-Hello? I am so sorry the update took three years… I don't play League anymore so finding the inspiration to continue writing can be difficult. That being said, my boyfriend has been playing a lot of Runeterra and it has sparked my interest in lore again, which btw is still the old lore so you don't confuse yourself needlessly. Again, I'm really sorry for how long these take but thank you so, so much to the people who keep up with me despite that fact. I've actually had this chapter mostly done since 2018… but it wasn't at a satisfying point where I felt it was good enough to publish. So if people feel indifferent about the ending bit, that's probably why.
To my Reviews:
Adonna2424: Thank you so much for your dedicated support and I'm again so sorry it takes me so long to get updates out. It's reviews like yours that keep me going honestly, I never forget about the story and what I want from it, it just takes time.
Baygood: Somehow, I feel you're going to hate me a bit more this time around lmaoo.
Politoed844: Similar to what I said to Adonna, thank you for being so dedicated to the fic, I'm really so honoured you enjoy it so much and honestly… I started this early in my highschool career and now I'm well into my twenties. It's been quite the journey seeing how I progress as a writer from where I started. I hope this chapter satisfies and I would like to get started on the next, a lot of it depends on if I feel people care enough for me to keep going.
Manti: This one's for you!
Electra Heartless: It is always my pleasure to provide, hopefully I'm not too late!
Cover image belongs to irahi on deviantArt.
All rights reserved to Riot Games and their ownership of these characters and lore.
Now, onto the chapter!
Lumen Crimseon
Chapter XVII | The Search
I honestly could not tell you what was rushing through my head at that current point.
Whatever medication that had been pumped into me was already beginning to wane by the time I had made the trek outside of Noxus' outskirts – my staggard attempts at running going entirely dismissed by any guards that may or may not have been on duty, they never cared for anything more than their paycheck at the end of the day. Having knelt down once I was at the very edge of the city, I held a hand to my chest as my breathing labored, needing to find the will to push forward.
"Fucking… Cassiopeia… fucking Katarina… fucking… everyone! Damn it all!" I practically bellowed in some release of pent up frustration, slamming my still healing fist into the dirt beneath me. I felt hot tears sting the corners of my eyes, and in this solitude I still felt so…
Weak.
Gods, how this weakness was deafening. How much of a fool I was. I was not meant for a life such as this! Of love and loving back. Of protecting. I knew this. I did. I told myself every moment, of every second of every day that passed that I was a fool.
But I couldn't help myself.
I was a fool desperate for the affection of something good. Of someone good.
Laying there on all fours, my knees to the dead grass that surrounded the polluted city and my knuckles whitening with tension as it crushed the brown blades within my grasp. The only pure water to touch those plants fell that evening. Drop by drop.
Perhaps it would have been easier, to end it all there.
I looked wearily to my hands, their state. Then down to my injured chest. Was this worth it? This miserable, terrible pain.
For a chance at a single taste. For her?
…
Pushing myself back to my feet, I wiped my eyes with my sleeves. This was not about her. This was about so much more. She was something I did not deserve.
But I would change that.
I loved her more than anything. And my hatred, my weakness… brought us together.
But it would not keep us together.
I would become something worth it. I will make a life that was worth it, for the both of us. Looking to the future… was never my style. But.
I needed to try.
So, I pressed onward. Intent on boarding the next ship to the League, where I might make way for Demacia.
•
My legs felt as though they could have given out at any moment, and by then truly, perhaps a part of me wished they had. Morning was already breaching over the horizon as the sky filled the many shades and hues of colors I once preferred sans from my canvas. Yet, in this moment of absolute exhaustion, mentally and physically, I looked toward the rising sun with perhaps something uncharacteristic.
A glimmer of hope.
The city was just before me.
Demacia.
As the sun's rays touched its gold trimmed walls and buildings, I found that proud anger and bitterness began to crumble.
How I wish I could have been born here. Fortunate enough to be raised into luxury. No, not even luxury. Even the simplest blacksmith would have been more than enough. More than Noxus. The tragedy stung my heart, in ways I never allowed it before. My teeth grit.
Now was not the time for this.
Perhaps life will be different after, but first comes her. I had to make sure they did not come for her. I had to make sure she was safe.
My recklessness these passing months would be the death of me sooner or later. And with this current climate, sooner might be preferable.
As I approached the Crownguard house and made way into their backyard, about as silently as an injured Noxus assassin could, I turned my shroudless gaze up toward the woman's window. I was donning very little for what I normally did, naught more than boots, pants and a shirt. I felt more vulnerable than ever in my life.
I had nearly released the breath that was now bursting at my lungs. Until I felt a sharp point press to the back of my head. The point of an arrow head.
"I knew it was you," a deeper, more hoarse female voice rang out. I stood perfectly still.
Damn.
"Marcus, was it? Or should I say…"
She moved in front of my vision whilst keeping the point directed at me dangerously, exposing the face of Demacia's ranger-knight to my amber gaze.
Quinn.
"Talon."
Great. Seemed everyone knew. I now questioned the prospect of escaping this situation alive.
My odds were not high.
"Give me one reason why I shouldn't just kill you now?" she growled out, a certain extrinsic tone lacing those words that I knew meant she was as serious as they came.
I did not so much as swallow; my face remaining still as stone.
"I cannot," I replied simply, my hands now raised in a casual defensive position. "you have every right to kill me. For the blood on my hands, what right do I have to be standing here?"
Having adjusted the arrow head to the softness of my neck with her new position, she applied a threatening level of pressure, breaking the skin. I could feel the warm blood begin to trail down my pallid flesh.
"Talon, the Blade's Shadow. You know, the Crown wanted me to go after your head. You are a wanted man. But they wanted you for a crime you didn't commit. I knew your style. I study all that Noxus keeps close to their chest. I am the antithesis to the very thing you stand for," she manages out in a firm tone.
My face remained expressionless. Demacians loved their speeches.
"If you are to kill me, then be done with it already. I am not one for games, or prattling," I noted blandly.
I knew though, with what knowledge she seemed to spew out on me, that this would cause her to lower her bow. As it did.
"To go down without a fight, is unlike you. To be out here at the break of dawn as light pours in, is unlike you. I am only to spare you now because… you know something of her disappearance, don't you?"
My heart dropped.
"Disappearance?" Emotion tainted my voice in a rueful crack, but at that moment, the rampant beating of this vile organ within my chest made it hard to think.
"You do…" she frowns, taking a small – yet still cautious – step back. I was not one to underestimate Quinn. She was a skillful anti-assassin. A weapon made by Demacia to snuff out those who made their living in Noxus doing what they did best. A soldier built to kill the likes of me.
Not that I blamed her. How could I? It would be similar to the likes of condemning a health inspector for shutting down a rat infested building. She is but doing what is best for those righteous. Deemed righteous.
Not the rats though.
"Afraid not," I admit in a tired tone. "I was too late." Arms dropping to my side, there were a number of things that could be happening to the girl. But the most likely was death.
She was dead.
Twisting her lips into something of a torn, confused expression, Quinn brought her fingers to them slowly, emitting a sharp whistle that echoed through the surrounding area. I winced. Flapping down in a gust of wind and a recognizable squawk, Valor perched himself to the woman's arm, casting me a knowing stare.
Seemed I presumed too much of the woman when I did. Of course she would not make a scene in the middle of a Demacian public area when we first met that time ago in the library.
Though at that moment, the only thing I felt was the unrelenting squall of heartbreak. Of sorrow. Death.
Dead.
"Tell me what you mean, and why you are here," she says in a strained tone. It was clear enough to me, the last thing she found any pleasure in, was extracting information from a Noxian. We were similar in that regard. I had no interest in talking.
Dead.
"Mmm," I made an undetermined sound, my fingers opening and closing in a fist. The bird's talons tightened around Quinn's leather gauntlet, a constricting noise further clouding my mind.
Dead...
"Someone is after her. They set us up. Both of us. To... " I press my lips together, taking a deep breath to calm myself. "We were used as a means to an end," I eventually muttered out, my eyes casted away.
Dead… she was dead.
Somehow, I knew this woman understood what I meant. She was certainly no fool, and she worked with the cryptic doings of assassins nearly on the daily. I heard her sigh.
"Oh Lux…" she noted in a sad tone. "what have you gotten yourself into…" she mumbled under her breath. Shaking her head, she stepped toward me. "I have absolutely no reason to help you, or keep you alive for that matter, you deserve to die for every life you have taken."
I nearly flinched.
"But. Lux… she is a good girl. A good woman. She has done so much for Demacia… and she is so young still," her voice wavers, something more there. "She is one of our citizens," she eventually levels out, "I have to find her… and if you are the only lead I have, then I need you. Clearly there is… something there. I should not trust you. Not in the slightest. But whoever did this, did so without a trail… and to be frank, yours has smeared it every step of the way."
"You need not threaten me to help you. Regardless if you had held me at arrow-point or not, I would have found her. Even if it killed me. Seems… it is… is a bit… fruitless now," I choked.
She frowns. Her mouth quivers as though she may open it and say something. Perhaps to even ask something, but she resigns instead.
"Was there anything left behind at all?" I asked eventually, the pregnant silence lingering all but too long.
"The only thing missing is her wand."
Her wand?
My brows furrowed. Her wand… if she was captured there was no way the Black Rose would have taken her weapon with her. They were not ones who valued honourable warfare.
My eyes squinted.
There was still hope. Like a light in the dark.
"I do not… think she is captured then. Not yet," my injured hand moved to rub across my mess tresses of hair, Quinn moving next to me to offer me a somewhat perplexed peer.
"Not yet?" she echoes, the sun behind us now beginning to fully rise in the sky, filling the Crownguard garden. "We had best find a better location. Fortunately, only I know the face of the Blade's Shadow here. You need not worry about alarming the guards… Perhaps potential fans of 'Marcus', however." She said with a negligible tone of humour that failed to reach her face.
I scoff.
"I think I lost most of my 'fans' during my last excursion here. Now then…?" I press.
"Hmph. Right, this way," she gestures two fingers, leading us from out of the residence.
•
I had to admit. Despite this ordeal not being my typical form or function, there was some relief that came from knowing someone was on my side.
Sort of.
Perhaps, not so much on my side, moreso holding me hostage for the sake of finding someone more important. Emphasis on hostage.
She had taken me somewhere more secluded. A now abandoned guard post just outside the city. Presumably after the great production of Demacias glorious walls, they found little need for such posts. I entered in front of her, always watching my back.
The inside was surprisingly quaint. Flowers and drawings donned the walls. I scoffed. Not exactly the expected lair of an anti-assassin, but I had learned by now that looks could be deceiving. Most of the gently billowing sketches were that of birds, then random people. Then…
Her.
Reading. Speaking to others. About a dozen pictures of Luxanna just… living. I wanted to say it was creepy. Or even feel angry, maybe even jealous she had the ability to replicate the woman I called my own's visage onto paper. But truly, was she mine? Did I have any right to claim such a thing. To berate Quinn over her admiration. I was far worse. I could not even watch from a distance. But in some part of me, that made me better. As I swept past the sketches, my eyes fell on the scout, my facade no doubt, failing to hide the hint of questioning.
"She is a good subject," Quinn noted awkwardly
"You hardly need tell me that…" I murmured in equal discomfort, perhap successfully managing to level the air even a bit. I stepped forward, slipping fingertips under a fluttering sketch as my thumb pressed into it to stabilize and raise it for viewing.
A shy wave. The concept of the picture gave way to the assumption she had spotted Quinn's drawing of her from afar.
My lips sucked inward with envy; It was unfair she could always be so close.
It was unfair.
Shaking my head, I had to refocus.
Releasing the drawing, I turned back toward Quinn who was merely standing before me in a somewhat inelegant pose – clearly watching my every move with unwavering scrutiny.
"So… tell me then what you know. We hardly have any time to waste gawking," She began, her voice strained as it was clear she made a valiant attempt to hold back any apprehension or disgust she might have felt toward me.
I would have prefered she were just honest, rich coming from me I am sure.
I exhaled deeply, before finally going into detail as to what had occured recently – with the stabbing and Lux's sudden change of mind. I decided to forgo my reasoning on how the blonde and I met at all. I figured explaining to an obvious admirer of the girl that I had desired to kill her, as well as stalked before seemingly becoming infatuated with her would not go over well.
Hearing my own thoughts on the matter, I even questioned what I was doing here. Any time the recollection of my actions come back to haunt me, I am reminded exactly why she deserves better.
"Lux…" Quinn's voice trembled more, only for her to once more try to find a semblance of control. "If Leblanc is after her… think… think…" the woman laboured, a wave of anxiety painting her features.
I felt my own beginning to numb. I understood she knew less than I did, but it did little to hide my frustration. We could not sit here mourning or panicking, she could still be out there.
"Quinn," I started, outstretching my hands in a sort of soothing fashion. I was never good at this sort of thing. Could hardly do it for myself. "Just… where would she go. To hide. If she had to hide? Somehow, I feel you would know this…" I managed to withhold too much bitterness in my tone.
"Hide...hide…" she breathed heavily, hands to her head as Valor stood perched on a nearby stand, offering his partner a sympathetic stare and a light chirp. "Hide. Where would she… oh. I know… I know where she could be," she noted desperately, not even wasting me a glance before plucking back up her previously discarded bow to disembark.
The sudden revelation invigorated and composed her – though seemingly not enough to remember the highly-wanted criminal she was leaving in her wake.
Fortunate for her, I was at her tail. For once, we shared a common goal.
We would find her. I know we would.
We had to, I could not lose someone important to me again.
•
I followed behind Quinn what felt like hours. It certainly did no good on my fairly freshly existing injury.
Much to my own dismay, the feeling I had begun to lose in my legs did me no favours as they eventually simply gave out on me, throwing me into the dirt.
So focused on finding Lux, I expected Quinn to merely continue on without me. I surely wouldn't have blamed her. Perhaps this would be the ironic end for the Blade's Shadow. My wound reopened, bleeding out in a grassy field beneath the sun's glow. It was hardly where I expected I would die… but I suppose I could not complain.
She probably would have loved it here. Maybe she would have come with me here where we could have sat here together. Maybe this all truly was a goosechase after all… reaching and grappling with naught more than an ounce of hope that she was okay. We were messing with the Blackrose now… surely even Quinn understood their reach runs deep.
Raising a shaking hand to my bandaged chest, I inhaled haggardly – dried lips pressed into a defeated, wan smile.
Ah, this was what I deserved. To go out so pathetically.
"Get up," I heard Quinn bark out, seemingly only taking pause when she realized my wound had reopened and was seeping through my shirt. "I can't believe you are going to make me have to take care of you. I should leave you here to die! This is your fault you know, this is all your fault," she yelled down at my failing form, breathing in and out practically in a pant.
Eventually kneeling down, her countenance was replaced with a bitter expression as she rose my shirt to inspect the wound, only then beginning to remove the bandages and pull out a small road kit of her own to redo them.
"I should just leave you here…" she whimpered, lips pulled into a tight frown as her eyes glimmered with evident unfallen tears. "But… but she would be devastated. Why did it have to be you," she choked, swallowing hard as she finished the job.
I almost felt sorry for her, but if anything, I felt a selfish vindication. She understood me, not many would.
Wrapping me around her shoulders via my arms, she would heft me up to stand before we carried on at a much slower pace.
"We should just stop… you are far too much a burden, but we are almost there…" she panted through the extra weight.
...
We continued on… until finally we came to a halt.
Just before us lay a cabin built into a hill.
Peering around with unease and some slight delusion, I had wondered when we made way to… Bandle City? At least the architect seemed reminiscent of it – had I even ever been there before? Everything felt like such a blur.
"Can you walk on your own yet?" She asked impatiently, her emotions wavering once more into more determination.
Groaning some, I managed to stabilize before pushing myself away from her. I wanted this to be over and done with as much as she did.
Looking at her, I offered a short nod.
Taking a deep breath, Quinn looked toward the door just before us before marching forward and reaching for the knob, opening to gaze inside.
...