My dear little broccolis💚💚💚

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💚 Second Chances 💚

Chapter 18 (2,0K)

My dear little broccolis💚💚💚

During the week that followed Robert and Maryse's departure, I grew closer to Clary, giving me sometimes the impression to be a stalker. Everywhere she is, I feel the need to be there too, with her, next to her, by her side, whether she was drawing, cooking or simply doing her homework. She is always in a part of my mind whatever thing I can be doing, I have Clary somewhere in my mind, knowing where she is and what she is doing.

Sometimes, I try to reassure myself saying that it's because Robert asked me to watch over her. The fact that we both are consigned to stay in the Institute has its perks and its downs. Sure we have more time to ourselves, learning more every time about each other, but we also can't do all the things normal couples do.

I won't lie, I am so jealous of Alec because he is able to do things as simple as going to movies, restaurants, or just walk in the park hand in hand with Magnus. I have to keep Clary in the shadows of the Institute as if she is something I am ashamed of. But she never said a word about it. It's as if she doesn't mind, or doesn't care.

I'll admit that it's something that's driving me mad: sometimes I can easily read her, but most of the time, she is an indescribable book. I barely know what she thinks, or what she feels.

She's always a mystery, as much as her past. She never talks about her, whether it's her childhood, or her life as a teenager before coming to the Institute, she never broaches the subject. I know how difficult it is to talk about a dark period of your life, so I never try to push, even though I am getting more and more curious.

Even more when Luke started to show up every now and then, checking up on her and locking them in her room for indefinite amounts of time. He sometimes talks to me, more than I expected given the fact that I don't know him, which makes me feel a little awkward even though I try not to show it. After Valentine, besides the Lightwoods, an adult has never shown an interest in me simply because I was there.

And of course, It all became more awkward when Luke found us on the couch, making out. Never have I seen Clary so embarrassed (and that's saying something given the fact that Izzy has walked on us in situations more awkward and less dressed). The way he looked at me made me feel like I was judged for all that I'd done in my life, good or bad.

In this instant, I knew what she meant when she said that he was the father she never had. He looked at me warily, trying to decide if I was good enough for her. I never made aware of what he thought of it though, because Clary never said anything about it.

We keep on sleeping together in her bed, even though it's the only thing we do. I never try to push her, unable to forget the terror I saw in her eyes the night of her nightmare. I can't bring myself to talk to her about it, knowing that she is doing her best to keep it buried, but I still want to rip his head off.

The problem is I don't know what he looks like, or even what's his name. This is pissing me off beyond the bearable. How can I be with her if I can't even protect her from her past? I decide to get more information from Izzy since they spend so much time together. Surely Clary must have mentioned something to her. From a girl to another.

So when Clary lets me know that she needs to draw the city, I go to Izzy's room to confront her on the topic, and I find Alec already sitting on her bed.

"No, she never talks about her ex with me. I didn't even know she had one." Izzy tells me after I question her. well, this is a disappointment.

"But you're her friend! Surely she must have at least mentioned his name to you!"

I mean, the reason I don't spend as much time as I want with Clary, is Izzy. She keeps stealing her away for hours on end, doing who-knows-what. That, added to the fact that Clary turned out to be a really studious person. I don't know why she bothers, because she obviously doesn't struggle to do her homework, but she always goes the extra mile. I guess she is one of those who always thrive for the best grade.

"No, she didn't. You know Clary, she never talks unless you ask her real direct questions. And even then, she manages to elude them."

"Like when you ask her about her being here. Did she ever give a concrete answer?" Alec butts in the conversation, making it deeper than I wanted. I mean, I just want a name, so I can find the asshole and bitchslap the life out of him.

And now, Alec is bringing up other issues that I didn't think about. still, even though I know the explanation is clumsy, I tell them what she told me, "She promised to Luke."

"But this isn't enough. Who promises things like that? And why to Luke, why not her mother?"

"I don't know!" I snap.

Alec is actually bringing to light questions that I have been asking myself for the whole past week. And I still haven't figured them out. Clary remains a conundrum.

As Izzy can sense that I am annoyed, she brings me back to my initial questions, "All I can tell you is that there is a Jonathan somewhere in the picture and that Simon is freaking out at the idea that she might go after him for some kind of vendetta. Apparently she's unpredictable enough to do it."

"Vendetta?"

"I know nothing more. Simon didn't really say anything, I just put the pieces together."

So her ex's name is Jonathan. And she would be crazy enough to go all on her own kick his ass. That doesn't seem good at all. Sure I know she can kick ass when she wants, but that doesn't actually mean that she will once she will have to face him.

But as I think about this new piece of information, something else takes my attention off of Clary.

"Wait a minute. Since when you and Simon hang out?!"

"On, we've been out on a few dates now."

"What!?" Alec and I look at her, not really sure of what we just heard.

First, Simon is (in addition on being out of her league) definitely not Izzy's type. Second, Izzy never goes on 'dates', she never wants to get involved with anyone, always saying that men are all scums. Third, there is no way in Hell, my sister is going to date a junky!

"Izzy, he's bad news!" I warn her, and she immediately retorts,

"So are you, and as far as I know, Clary never judged you for your past, and trust me, she knows where you come from!"

"What do you mea... That's beside the point! He's a junky!"

"That's precisely the point! Everyone deserves a second chance! I'm not judging Simon for his past, as Clary is not judging you from yours, so butt off! And for your information, Simon's been clean for a whole week."

I sigh but give up funder the glare directed at me with a death stare. The world has gone mad! How can my sister defend this lowlife junky with a rat face?

"If Dad finds out that you're dating an ex-junky, he's going to have a stroke." Alec points out, and I vigorously nod. Izzy's always been a daddy's girl, maybe this will make her reconsider.

"It's not like I'm pregnant, it's just a boy among others. He'll get over it." She says, and I feel slightly relieved. This isn't a real thing for her, and seeing how Alec reacts, he is relieved too.

"By the way, what do you mean Clary knows about my past? What did you tell her?"

"Nothing. It's just that she's not stupid. She knows you were a manwhore and that you wouldn't hesitate to crush people to obtain what you thought was justice. She also knows that you're an arrogant jerk and that she can't get too attached to you."

"She told you that?" I pale. Does Clary really think so low of me?

"No, Clary doesn't say things like that, but it's obvious. The way she acts around you, it's like she's doing her best to keep her emotions to herself because she knows that in the end, you'll hurt her."

"That's not it, Izzy." Alec intervenes, his voice barely a murmur.

I look at him, waiting for him to elaborate, but he just stares at his hands, hoping that we'll go on without him. When he can't avoid it anymore, he looks at me, and just like that, I know that he knows something. He gets up from Izzy's bed and leaves through the bathroom door, but of course, I follow him, under Izzy's murderous gaze (she hates being put aside)

"You know that Magnus is a hacker, right?" Alec says when we're alone in his room.

I nod wondering how this had anything to do with Clary. The fact that Magnus is hacking for the government came to light two nights ago, taking us all aback. How can a 19 years old be already a government agent?

"Well, Magnus actually knows Clary."

"What do you mean, she doesn't seem to know him."

"She doesn't. It's just that a few months ago, Luke came to Magnus. He was enraged and asked him to track someone. Someone, he didn't know what he looked like, how old he was, what was his name. Nothing. He just knew that he was in hotel Dumort at a certain date. Magnus tried to track him down, and when he couldn't, he went on the field because it bothered him so much to fail. There he heard ... rumours... "

"What kind of rumours?" I press and Alec hesitantly looks at me. I don't like the way his eyebrows are frowning, or his eyes are studying me.

"Something about a redheaded girl that didn't belong there but often came to help a friend of hers. Something about her getting raped by 'someone'. Someone who disappeared the next day without a trace."

I lean against the wall and let myself fall on the floor, my head in my hands. Suspecting the thing is something, but knowing for a fact that it is actually real for her, is another. I feel a wave of anger boiling in me that I didn't know I could feel.

"Who is he?"

"No one knows. Magnus calls him 'the Ghost' for he is untraceable. He looked everywhere and didn't find a single thing about him. Nothing. Not a face, not a name, not an age. Nothing."

"How long have you known?"

"Since Halloween."

"And you're telling me just now! Geez, Alec, I thought I was your brother! What kept you from telling me!? It's not like it's something I can just overlook and pretend that never happen!"

"I only kept Clary's wishes."

"She told you!?"

"Of course not. She didn't even tell you or Izzy, so why would she tell me, when we don't talk so much. It's just that it should have been her choice to tell you."

Alec's gay sensitive side is starting to piss me off.

"Anyway, you already knew, you just didn't want to admit it." He states, and he is right. I have known since the first time she shrieked at my presence and me staring at her, but I didn't dare even formulate the thought of it in my mind. It was too ignoble to be true.

I get up, feeling completely beat down when Alec stops me. "Jace, don't do anything stupid."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Like confronting her on things she doesn't want to talk about or going after ghosts."

I shake my head and goes to the rooftop where I know I'll find her.

.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.

💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚

💚 So we Izzy ... urgh.

💚 And Simon is playing with fire ... Who do you think he will end up with?

💚Well, let me know what you think. What was your favourite part? What do you think will happen next?

💚 Also, if you want sneak-peeks and pictures, go follow my Facebook page, Mina's Broccolis ^^

💚 Cassandra Clare owns the names of the characters from the Mortal Instruments franchise, everything else is mine.

Love, Mina💚💚💚