Hello, friends. I had a lot of down time to work on this
Ectoblood, andtheny and Rebb helped me look over this chapter to make sure everything flowed right, so thank you guys so much!
Chapter 18
The Gossip Page
"Take a person's memories, and you change who they are." -Veronica Roth
Phantom's flight from Vlad's mansion ended only after he had flown several miles. He twisted midair to stare back the way he had come, but the sky was empty aside from some sweeping clouds, the city below him casting a warm, inviting glow. It seemed Vlad had chosen not to chase after him. For now. Phantom shuddered, remembering the way the man's eyes had lost their focus as he stared at him. Combined with Vlad's apparent fear of Phantom as a separate entity, the way he had only stopped when Phantom brought up Vlad's attempt at cloning…
Phantom shook his head, dismissing the matter from his mind. He—or they—could deal with Vlad after Friday.
He pulled the Fenton Earphone from his utility belt and, after switching it on, pressed it into his ear. "Tucker?" he called. "Sam?"
"Danny!" his friends exclaimed, their voices merging into static over the speakers.
A weight lifted from Phantom's shoulders. The past hour had been stressful, alarming, and extremely upsetting, but now Phantom could feel himself beginning to smile. Truly, what would he do without his friends? "Missed me?"
One of them scoffed.
"Dude," Tucker said, "you flew into Vlad's mansion with only a girl who used to work for him as backup."
"Yes, but that girl is one of the most skilled ghost hunters I'm ever likely to meet," Phantom countered. "She also happens to be my girlfriend."
"Not right now she's not," Sam countered, which…was true. "And the last time those two worked together, she tortured you, Mr. Ghost."
Phantom winced. "I…see your point."
"Forget about that for now," Tucker said, impatient. "What happened?"
Ahh, the unpleasant part of the night…
Phantom grimaced. As succinctly as he could, he summarized what he and Valerie had found. He only lightly touched on how...close Valerie's suspicions had come to their secret before he ended on Vlad's arrival. He didn't want to share Vlad's fear toward Phantom as an "untamed" ghost half, but he admitted Vlad knew about the Ghost Catcher. He even shared Vlad's disapproval but when Sam and Tucker grudgingly admitted to feeling similar misgivings, he distracted them with Vlad's odd behavior.
In his ear afterward, Sam and Tucker bounced ideas about what Valerie and Vlad were thinking back and forth. Phantom rolled onto his back and closed his eyes, letting the wind and the voices of his friends wash over him.
It was nice…Sure the topic was an uncomfortable one, but hearing Sam and Tucker tackle the problem helped ease Phantom's own fear. It was good not to be alone, to know they had his back, but more importantly, it just felt good to hear his friends.
He smiled.
"Anyway," he said once the conversation lulled, "what about you two? What have you been up to?"
"Oh," Sam began, sounding reluctant. "We've, um…"
Glee clear in his voice, Tucker interrupted, "We've been exploring your gossip page."
Phantom blinked his eyes open. "My…what page?"
"He means Paulina's website," Sam explained, sighing. "The one where they're talking about you and your human half because someone took a picture of you two. Remember? I guess it didn't affect you a whole lot, but the school is in a small uproar about it. You can ask your human half. Some people were watching him like a hawk as soon as school started, but after lunch it got really bad. Tuck and I just wanted to find out what they were saying."
Tucker snickered.
That was a bit worrisome. Phantom tilted his head as he stared up at the stars, allowing his flight to slow. "Is it…bad?"
"Define 'bad?'" Sam said dryly.
Tucker cackled like a deranged hyena. "Dude, man, you have to see what they're saying about you two."
Phantom winced. Definitely worrisome. What could be amusing to Tucker could easily prove disastrous to Phantom. It wasn't as though Tucker knew Fenton and Phantom were trying to hide anything other than the obvious secret.
"Where are you?" Phantom asked. "I'll come to you—either of you—and you can show me then."
"I'm halfway to Vlad's," Tucker replied, "because I was afraid somebody was getting himself in trouble. I'm on my way back to the park, though."
"You may as well head my way, Danny," Sam said, "it's not as though I have anything better to do."
"Better go invisibly, dude," Tucker suggested, "don't want people getting the wrong idea about the two of you too." He snickered again, and Sam huffed into the earphone.
Apprehension tightened Phantom's chest. He flipped over and sped toward Lookout Hill, more alarmed than ever about what someone might have guessed. "'Too?'" he asked, trying not to sound as worried as he felt. "What do you mean, 'too?'"
"Oh, no way I'm spoiling the surprise. You gotta see it for yourself."
Phantom would much rather not see it for himself, actually, but he pulled out his and Fenton's phone anyway, unwilling to wait. Besides, if it was what he suspected, better for him to see it alone than allow Sam to read anything from his reaction. She was sharper than most.
"What is the website called?" Phantom asked.
Tucker teased him about being unable to wait instead of answering, but Phantom got the website in the end, thanks to Sam. As the page loaded, Phantom prepared himself for a blindingly pink background, poorly taken photos of himself photoshopped beside Paulina or decorated with hearts.
What he didn't expect was for his own color scheme to dominate the site, or for the website to be neatly organized into a forum. He stared at his phone for several seconds, unable to connect Paulina to what he was seeing. A forum seemed too nerdy for the popular girl. The only bright color on the page was an acidic green that nearly matched his eyes, and even that was only for the links. The regular text was white, the background a near black, but nothing at all like the bright eyesore he had expected.
"Um," he began hesitantly, "are you sure this is Paulina's website?"
"Right?" Sam replied, sounding amused and oddly impressed. "It's Paulina's for sure, though. You can click on the 'Phantom's Future Girlfriend' creator link if you don't believe us."
"I'll pass."
Phantom scrolled through the forum, stunned. There were so many topics, all about him. Sure it was flattering, but now that he was Danny Phantom through-and-through, they weren't just talking about his alias, there and gone again as soon as he reverted to human. Now they were talking about him. No masks to hide behind. It was…somewhat embarrassing.
Some of the pinned topics included links like "How did the ghost boy die?" and "Inviso-Bill sightings" which Phantom appreciated for the pun even if the media-given name made him wince.
He scrolled to the unpinned topics, skimming the links without really reading them. It was…a lot to take in. He knew—they all knew—his Phantom identity had enough fame to be considered a minor celebrity for the city, but being hounded by fans and paparazzi hadn't equated in his mind to those same fans holding serious discussions about him online. He felt torn between wanting to know what they thought and reluctant to invade a space that, while about him, clearly wasn't for him.
He shook his head. If it related to Fenton, he had to know what they were saying. Ideally before Fenton heard anything relating to their potential feelings.
With that in mind, he started reading the topic links, searching for one that could relate to what happened on Saturday. "Where is the photo?" he asked before spotting a topic labeled "The Ghost Boy met someone outside my apartment!" "Oh, nevermind, I think I found it."
"I'm pretty sure someone must have helped Paulina set all this up," Sam continued from the earlier conversation as Phantom waited for the page to load. "There's just no way she did it by herself."
Phantom hummed. "Probably Starr? She is kind of a genius."
"Really?" Sam asked, dubious. "You mean Starr the satellite? The one that follows at Paulina's heels and giggles over girly magazines? That Starr?"
"Seconded," Tucker chimed in. "She's, like, way smart, Sam. I don't even know why she's in our grade."
"And how do you two know that?"
"She did a year's worth of our math homework," Phantom replied somewhat absently.
The page had loaded, and as promised, the photo his friends had described was the first one posted. Immediately, Phantom knew the photo was real. His memory of the moment was sharp, pulled into focus by the sight of Fenton staring up at him, vulnerable as he so rarely allowed himself to be and searching for Phantom's approval.
Apparently, when Phantom had stopped Fenton to ask what had happened inside Valerie's apartment, he had stopped him outside an apartment, and the opportunistic fan inside had wasted no time uploading the pictures they had taken.
"When did Starr do that?" Sam demanded.
"During last year's fake beauty pageant," Phantom answered even more absently than before, focused now on the fan's opening comment.
Their description of what they had seen outside their window gave Phantom a different perspective to the events he remembered, and he wasn't sure he liked it. It had been a moment of many things for him. Maybe even for Fenton. But this observer didn't know anything about that, their history or what was happening between them.
They didn't know how much Fenton had struggled to meet expectations, the amount of pressure that had been placed on him. They only saw a human kid shouting at Phantom. They saw Phantom remain calm and so they assumed that Phantom was trying to help and Fenton wasn't letting him.
They then described how they saw the argument resolve itself, Phantom laugh and smile about something (his own helpless attraction to Fenton, as it happened), and in the post they insisted there must be something deeper going on. Phantom lifting Fenton into his arms and then flying into the sky all but confirmed it for them.
Phantom chewed on his lip, upset but not sure why. It wasn't as though the poster was wrong. Events had happened exactly as they described. Perhaps he was upset because he and Fenton had been observed in an intimate setting, and that could cause trouble for them—had caused trouble for them. But it felt deeper than that.
After all, in some way, their conversation on that street had led Phantom to where he was now; divided once more from his human self and struggling with a crush he could not address and could not ignore. It was…it had been…a deeply personal moment for him.
"Sam?" Tucker called, bringing Phantom's attention back to the present.
Sam had gone quiet. Phantom ran the conversation before he started reading through his mind and then blew out a quiet sigh. "Fenton and I were made the judge for the pageant because Aragon wanted a half ghost to choose his bride, remember? A lot of the girls tried to score points by doing us favors, and Starr was one of them. She did a year's worth of our algebra homework when I..."
Phantom paused, frowning. Him? Or him and Fenton? It had seemed so obvious until that point that they were acting in unison even if Phantom's mind wouldn't see them as a whole being, but…asking Starr to do their homework felt distinctly like something he had done alone.
Hesitantly, slowly, and in a much quieter voice, he corrected, "—we asked?"
"Oh really?" Sam demanded, a hard edge in her voice. "What else? A foot massage? Maybe a kiss on the cheek? Do you not feel bad about taking advantage of them? At all?"
Tucker hissed Phantom's name, warning him to backtrack.
Phantom blinked, shook his head, and looked around. He was still soaring over the city's buildings, but had almost reached the park so he turned himself invisible. Just in case. "Are you mad at me or them?" he asked Sam warily. "Because your words say me but your tone says you want to hit something."
"Something like you?" Sam suggested, mockingly sweet. "Where are you anyway?"
"Keeping my distance…"
Tucker laughed. "Wise move, clueless!"
Phantom rolled his eyes. "I understand why Sam is upset, Tuck. I am not 'clueless,' I know what jealousy sounds like."
Tucker and Sam fell silent, which worked for Phantom, allowing him to read without further distraction. The first few people to comment on the original poster's image and description were excited and curious about who Fenton could be since the window glare had hidden most of his face, but after someone identified Fenton, the excitement seemed to ebb. A few questioned, "Who?" and "Why is the Ghost Boy talking to HIM?" but they didn't generate the same interest, and the thread ended soon after.
"I don't understand," Phantom said, frowning. "Why would this thread alone make everyone so interested in Fenton?"
"Is the thread in question 'The Ghost Boy met someone outside my apartment?'" Sam asked.
"Yes."
"Then that's because it's an old thread. The one that everyone is gossiping about is titled 'Phantom and Fenton: what's the connection?' It should be one of the more recent topics."
Phantom winced. "Usually those two names next to each other means trouble for us."
"At least they use your ghost name," Tucker offered. "Most of the time it's 'Ghost Boy' this and 'Ghost Boy' that."
"The content of the thread is good for your secret too," Sam added. "You should check it out. Maybe you'll learn a valuable lesson about splitting yourself."
Phantom sighed but pressed the back button and scrolled back toward the top. He clicked on the thread and eyed the first post warily. It was…very long. "Some things are worth taking a risk on," he muttered.
"Like what? Not making a fool of yourself because you can't think straight?"
"Among other things. Now shh. I'm trying to read."
Sam muttered something unkind, but Phantom ignored it in favor of reading the post.
Old_time_hole: Listen, I graduated from Casper last year, but I remember Fenton. He was a scrawny, clumsy kid who kept getting in trouble. He looked like he was always three seconds from passing out (honestly? Mood) and there was something downright spooky about him, but he was, like, completely normal otherwise. If it wasn't for his parents, who here would even know his name? You would forget who he was ten seconds after talking to him, he's that normal.
So what the hell is going on between him and Phantom?
First, it was that paparazzi photo the newspaper published where Phantom's, what? Sneaking into Fenton's bedroom? Next, he's talking to Fenton on a street that's nowhere near Fenton's house, and now people are going on about Fenton's strange behavior around ghosts? There are even some ghosts that apparently recognize him? His classmates also swear Fenton led them in an attack against a pirate ghost ship—and, funny enough! Phantom didn't show up until after Fenton had been hurt and thrown overboard. What took him so long? Why only then? Mrs_Phantom swears Phantom shows up wherever Fenton is too! Like that's not even the first time.
Is there something about Fenton that attracts ghosts to him? Like, did his parents leak some sort of substance on him and now ghosts find him delicious and Phantom's trying to protect him from getting eaten? Or is Phantom (and maybe the other ghosts) just after his parents' equipment? Are they friends or is it just business?
And what the hell is up with them having the same first name anyway? Coincidence? I THINK NOT!
Phantom blew out a breath. Well. That could have been worse. It was far from the only post, however, despite its creation being only two days ago. The thread was…alarmingly popular.
Phanatic56: Phantom's probably just using him for his parents tech. Seriously, why would Phantom even care about this guy? He's a jerk. Have you heard the way he talks to Dash? Fenton thinks he's so cool but he's lame, trust me. He and his friends are crazy.
Moon_ghost_goddess: uhh maybe we think Phantom cares because ghost-ate-my-homework saw them fly off together? They said Fenton wrapped his arms around Phantom's neck and everything. And let's be real, Dash can be a real dick. Just because Fenton stands up to him and bullies him right back doesn't mean Dash doesn't deserve it.
Phanatic56: that doesn't mean they're friends. Maybe Phantom was just giving him a lift. You don't know.
Ghost-ate-my-homework: Have YOU seen the Ghost Boy carry anyone like that? He avoids everybody! I've never even seen him talk, like legit TALK to anyone before. It's always fight ghosts! Apologize for the mess! Fly away! The end!
You didn't see the way he looked and acted around this kid, alright? Fenton was unloading a lot of bullshit and Phantom just kept looking at him like he was waiting for Fenton to finish so he could comfort him. Which he did! Because THEY LITERALLY FLEW AWAY TOGETHER
Phanatic56: your making a lot of assumptions for someone who doesn't see Phantom on a daily basis
Ghost-ate-my-homework: Oh and you do? Just because you live in Amity Park and go to Casper High? PLEASE, we get ghost attacks here in Ellington too, you know
GhostLover83: guyyyyyys I hate to be That Person but…sneaking into his bedroom? Bridal carrying him into the sky? I don't think friends is the word we should be using, if you catch my drift
Ghost-ate-my-homework: NOW who's making assumptions?
Inviso_Billy: I bet they're friends, but more than that? Don't Fenton's parents want to, like, extra kill Phantom?
GhostLover83: ikr it's very romeo and juliet, huh?
Mrs_Phantom: Danny's cute but he's a total loser. Phantom has much higher standards than that. Have you seen the way he smiled when I hugged him? There's no way he has someone else!
Moon_ghost_goddess: Uh-oh, the queen is here
Inviso_Billy: Can we just get back to the friends thing? Because I think that has legit possibilities. I mean, why would Fenton help a ghost? He wouldn't! Unless he was friends with him. And we've all seen Phantom use FentonWorks Tech before so he must have an in.
Old_time_hole: But then why is it Danny Fenton and not Jazz Fenton? Why is Phantom so focused on this kid and not the other kid? I mean, let's face it, Jazz is hot, athletic, smart, and she has a grudge against her parents' profession. She would be the perfect one to help Phantom against their parents wishes, but she's not the one Phantom seems interested in.
So it can't just be the Tech, right? There's something more going on, guys, I'm telling you
GhostLover83: they bangin'
Phanatic53: I will find out who you are and I will shove your freak ass so deep into the lockers they'll have to get the Jaws of Life to break you out I s2g
GhostLover83: kinky
Inviso_Billy: Guys, seriously, can we at least agree they're probably friends?
Phantic56: NO
It continued in that vein for a while, and Phantom let out a quiet breath. The possibility of him and Fenton having feelings for each other was almost completely glossed over. No one had even mentioned the possibility that they were one single person. If anything, their original secret seemed more protected than ever, given that people were willing to craft wholly contrived excuses for why they were meeting and potential ways they could have met and befriended one another.
At least, that was what he thought until, moving through the next few pages and scrolling down, he found a new photo, posted by Inviso_Billy with a short description. As soon as he saw it, Phantom started berating himself for being such an idiot. He groaned, and in his ear, Tucker laughed.
It was the one picture he had allowed Mikey to keep. Captured between the bodies of fleeing students and now immortalized on the Internet forever, Mikey had snapped a picture of Phantom, his fear and feelings for Fenton writ clear all over his face as he leaned over him. Fortunately Fenton had been too confused from the concussion or he would have blushed and reacted to Phantom's proximity in that adorable way of his, adding an even clearer image of what was going on between them.
Phantom had known it might get out when he left the photo in Mikey's care. He had known. The photo had felt significant, though. Something the merge couldn't take away. Even now he couldn't help saving the picture to his phone, unwilling to lose it.
What he hadn't known was how much clearer the image would be once it was full size and not viewed through a tiny camera screen, how much emotion would be visible on his face. Terror, yes. Tenderness too. If Phantom had a heart as a ghost, it was in Fenton's hands and it looked close to breaking.
Phantom ran a hand over his face, his eyes. He couldn't help how he felt. He could have deleted the photo when he had Mikey's camera in his hands, but he would never choose to even if Clockwork allowed him to go back. There was nothing about this situation he would or could change, there was no point agonizing over it now.
It was just…frustrating.
He breathed in deeply and raised his hand into his hair, freeing his eyes so he could resume reading.
Ghost-ate-my-homework: HOLY SHIT
GhostLover83: It's not just me right? That's not the face you make when your "friend" gets hurt! I told you guys!
Yes-I-am-a-Star: Uhhhhhhhhhhhh Paulina?!
Ghostbutt69420: dang and Paulina's been bragging about a smile…If Phantom looked at me like that, I'd be on cloud nine. How in the world is Fenton just sitting there?
Inviso_Billy: Well his friends must call him clueless for a reason. Or maybe he's just really dazed here. Like, I really thought he might have a concussion or something but he was perfectly fine when I asked him about it a little while later.
Hi-Casper: Wait, doesn't Fenton have a girlfriend tho? She ran right up to them a little after this, didn't she? Valerie or something right? She used to be one of the a-listers.
Ghostbutt69420: oh no poor Phantom /3
Mrs_Phantom: The Ghost Boy is just being a good hero you idiots, calm down. Danny has dangerous parents and a girlfriend. He's a coward, a loser, and most importantly, he's not me!
Yes-I-am-a-Star: certainly not as pretty as you
Mrs_Phantom: :3
Ghostbutt69420: maybe that's the thing tho. What if Phantom is gay?
Moon_ghost_goddess: NO
GhostLover83: HA SUCK IT HETS
Mrs_Phantom: PHANTOM IS SO NOT GAY! There's just no way he isn't attracted to me. You've seen the way he looks at me
Yes-I-am-a-Star: He could be bi or pan. Maybe gender doesn't really matter to ghosts and it's all a matter of the soul or something, maybe that's why he hasn't dated anyone in the two and half years he's been here
Mrs_Phantom: You're not helping Starr
Ghostbutt69420: hey didn't Phantom smile at someone in the crowd after the ghost fight?
Mrs_Phantom: Yeah, ME
Inviso_Billy: Actually, that was Fenton. I had a picture of it too but it got deleted by accident. You should have seen it though. I think they were communicating somehow about something. His smile was as big as Phantom's
Hi-Casper: Seriously? He followed Phantom outside instead of going to the nurse? Are we sure they're not dating?
Moon_ghost_goddess: Fenton is dating Valerie Gray so unless he's two-timing her, I'd say Phantom is still available.
Old_time_hole: Single, maybe, but available? Scroll back up to that pic right now and tell me Phantom doesn't have feelings for that kid, ghost-hating parents or not. In fact, if they're not hiding a secret relationship, I bet actual money Phantom wants to date Fenton.
Phantom tried to keep it in, but the moment he read the words, it burst out of his mouth without permission. "Date Fenton?"
A second later he crashed into the branches of a tree.
The tree on Lookout Hill, to be precise. Sam guffawed with laughter, both in Phantom's ear and below him, and when she shared the news with Tucker, he joined her. Phantom grumbled a few unkind words under his breath, but they lacked any sort of heat, his attention less on his friends' teasing and the tree situation than on his whirling thoughts. He wiggled through the smaller branches until he reached the trunk and could sit more comfortably on a large branch.
"Oh man," Tucker gasped, "oh man, I knew it would be good, but I didn't think you would actually crash into a tree!" He barely squeaked the end of the sentence before he started laughing again.
Phantom shook his head, felt a twig tug at his hair, and irritably started trying to untangle it.
"The worst part is they would have kept thinking the two of you were friends if you hadn't split yourself again," Sam called up to him, speaking more to him than through the earphone. "Now everyone thinks you're dating yourself!"
She laughed again. Tucker started another fresh round.
Phantom successfully pulled the twig free without pulling on his hair too much. He threw the twig at Sam's head. She paused her laughter enough to gasp "Hey!" but it was too amused and rolled easily into the next laugh. Phantom sighed and leaned against the trunk. He supposed, from their perspective, it really was funny. To keep up appearances, Phantom should laugh too.
He just couldn't find the humor in something that was horribly, painfully true.
"Date?" he whispered to himself, unable to wrap his head around it. He didn't want that, he couldn't, but the word, the idea of it…it was such a strange thing to consider.
He had feelings for Fenton, he knew that, he had accepted it. But to build a relationship on those feelings? Something like that had never crossed his mind. Why would it? They had a girlfriend, but more importantly, their existence, as new and intoxicating as it was, could not last. He and Fenton had a literal deadline. There was little point in considering something more.
He wished his friends wouldn't laugh about it.
He sat in silence, his shoulders tense, head down. They couldn't see him, not with his invisibility active, but eventually his friends noticed his lack of response.
"Danny?" Sam called up. She pushed herself up to her knees and then slowly onto her foot, using the tree for balance as she stood. "You still there?"
Phantom licked his lips. "Yes. I'm just…reading."
"Oh."
A strained silence descended on them, not unlike the one right after Phantom said he wasn't clueless. He sighed. He needed to at least lure them away from the topic if he couldn't play along. The problem was…he wanted to talk to them about it. Unfortunately, even if Sam and Tucker were in on what was going on between Phantom and Fenton, they would…well, laugh. Scold them, probably. There would be little understanding and a lot of pressure to forget about Fenton as someone other than his human half.
At least it would be out in the open though, Phantom thought. At least I could speak instead of holding it all inside.
Tucker took a stab at guessing what was wrong and asked, "Is it about Valerie? I don't think she'll take the rumor seriously, dude, but you could always tell her the whole truth if you're worried."
Earlier that night, Phantom would have agreed, but after seeing how angry Valerie was about Fenton lying to her and how potentially close she was to their secret…She had been really angry, even if he didn't know exactly what she was thinking, he knew that much. She was getting closer to the truth, and that truth seemed to be hurting her. Would she even stay with them if she knew they had been lying?
If she would hate us if she knew the truth, Phantom thought, do we have any right to date her when she doesn't? He set one foot on the branch and hugged his knee to his chest. I'm taking advantage of her ignorance. That is not only wrong but potentially harmful for us both.
But I could lose her...
"I think you're right, Tuck," he admitted hesitantly, "it is the only way we can move forward. But I can't tell her like this. It will have to wait until Fenton and I are one again." Unfortunately, Fenton might not agree. It wasn't only Phantom's decision, after all. He sighed. He needed to talk to Fenton, really talk to him.
"All the more reason to merge again sooner than Friday," Sam said. "You guys are making a mess of things whether you're willing to see it or not! The only way you can fix everything is if you join together again."
Phantom leaned his forehead against the tree trunk, a bitter, half-smile on his lips. Give up Fenton and himself to save his relationship with Valerie? He had done that once before, hadn't he?
He looked down at his phone. His glow reflected off the screen, making it difficult to see his reflection in detail. He rubbed his thumb over his blurred image and closed his eyes. Fenton had sent him a text earlier, agreeing to hold out until Friday despite the hardships. It was a precious gift from one who had resisted their separation for so long. Could Phantom really just let that go, even for Valerie?
"No," he said, "not until Friday."
Sam opened her mouth and groaned her frustration partway into a shout. "You're insane, Danny," she snapped. "Just for the record. And when this is all over and your life's a mess, I'm gonna point that out. It's going to be the 'I told you so' of the year."
Phantom chuckled weakly. "Noted. But even if my life falls apart, so long as you two are still my friends, how bad could it be?"
"Don't you dare get sappy on me," Sam grumbled, sounding embarrassed, "that's cheating, you jerk. Take me home before I barf."
"What about Tucker?" Phantom asked. "Aren't you almost here, Tuck?"
"Eh…yeah, but go ahead. Sam's ankle is probably hurting, and I can't imagine it's been fun for her to sit on that hill all day. I'll keep heading there, and by the time I get to the Hill, you'll be back to give me my own lift home."
Amusement was rich in Tucker's voice by the end of the sentence, and finally Phantom felt his own lips pulling into a true smile. "Using me for my powers, guys? I'm hurt."
"It's the least you can do for helping you patrol," Sam said haughtily. "I can think of loads of things we could have been doing instead."
"Yeah, dude," Tucker added, "even when you're one Danny, we don't patrol this much. Are you sure you haven't switched personalities again?"
Phantom's smile turned a little sheepish. This, at least, he could share, even if he would keep the finer details to himself. "I'm sure. I am merely overcompensating for Fenton's benefit. I need to prove I can protect the town on my own so he will not cut our separation short."
"Oh, so it's your human half we should be pressuring?" Sam suggested, half serious, half teasing. "I guess we know who's in charge in this relationship."
Tucker choked out another laugh.
Phantom sniffed. With a feeling not unlike stepping onto a taut wire, he joked back, "Please, we all know who would top."
Tucker laughed a little more before groaning. "Oh, oh please, no! Let's not go there. The mental images alone will scar my mind for days."
Phantom snorted. He pushed off the branch he sat on and floated to the ground beside Sam. "Too much of a good thing for you to handle, Tuck?"
"As if!"
Having heard his voice behind her, Sam turned to face Phantom, violet eyes sparkling and lips curled into a smirk. "Are you sure you could top the fighter?" she asked slyly. Then she pointedly added, "Lover boy."
"Sam…" Tucker whined.
Phantom grinned, free in the knowledge she couldn't see it. He knew he could because he had. Sort of. Make-outs definitely weren't the same, but it seemed a good enough indication, especially when Fenton had been more comfortable following than leading during their practice.
Phantom's smile faltered. Actually…their practice had occurred before the split that made them into a lover and a fighter. Fenton was similar to the boy who had shied from Phantom's kiss during practice, but he wasn't quite the same. That one had sulked throughout the practice, but he hadn't wrestled with Phantom over the Ghost Catcher or dared to punch him when he crossed a line.
For that matter, the person Phantom had been during practice, while confident and smooth, thought more of his wounded pride than others' wants. He and Fenton, they were, technically speaking, not quite the same people they had been when they practiced in much the same way Phantom was no longer like their combined self. If he kissed Fenton, this Fenton, the one who fought him and smiled at him as if he had defeated Undergrowth all over again instead of some low level ghost…it would almost be like kissing him for the first time.
Phantom shook his head sharply, banishing the thought and the quick surge of excitement he felt as the idea took root. Stop it, he scolded himself.
But would Fenton give ground to him like he had before? After all, fighters did not give up easily…
…and wasn't that a thought?
Phantom cleared his throat. "Probably," he said, voice a little unsteady. "I mean, you saw how shy he is."
"Dude," Tucker groaned, "you spent way too much time thinking about that."
"Yes," Phantom agreed, embarrassed.
In contrast to Tucker's discomfort, Sam laughed. "You actually thought about it?"
"You said you wanted a lift home, Sam?" Phantom asked, ignoring the question in hopes they would drop it.
Sam laughed once more before nodding, allowing Phantom his escape.
Usually, he and Fenton carried Sam and Tucker into the air by holding their hand or wrapping an arm around their waist. They seemed to enjoy it more as it helped the illusion of flying on their own, and honestly, Phantom only needed to touch them to negate gravity. This time, mindful of Sam's hurt ankle, he lifted her into a bridal carry. She accepted the position more calmly than Fenton had and hooked one arm over his shoulder as he spread his invisibility over her.
"So you do carry 'just friends' like this too," she said.
"Like what?" Tucker asked over the earphone. "Oh you mean like a bride?"
Phantom could no longer see Sam's face, but he felt her tense and imagined she was blushing. "I hope you're not implying anything, Tuck," he said as he leapt into the sky with Sam, "because I distinctly remember you carrying Fenton and me to the hospital like this when we had to stop Spectra."
Tucker coughed. "That was to stop a ghost."
"And Sam is injured," Phantom pointed out.
"What about your human half then?" Sam teased. "The way your fans tell it, you were horribly romantic about the whole thing."
"Are you two seriously interrogating me on my motives behind carrying someone a certain way?" Phantom huffed. "There has never been an ulterior motive, I just use whatever way is easiest for everyone."
"Sounds like he's avoiding the question, Tucker," Sam said, a smile clear in her voice.
"Sure does, Sam," Tucker said, equally teasing.
"Are you two ever going to let this go?" Phantom asked, wary of the reply.
"Nope," they said in unison.
Phantom gritted his teeth. Perhaps he should be grateful they thought it more hilarious than anything, but it was just upsetting to hear his feelings turned into a joke.
It would be so very satisfying to admit that, yes, carrying Fenton like this had been horribly romantic. It had felt amazing. He couldn't stop thinking about it. It was throwing everything he thought he knew into question. He wanted to fly with Fenton again, he wanted to feel him fall asleep in his arms. So yes, actually, he did have feelings for Fenton, what of it?
…But they would tell him it was impossible. They would tell him they were the same person. They would insist he was letting his "lover" personality get the better of him.
Phantom let the frustration out as he sighed. What he was feeling might be true, but it had no place in their reality.
"Please refrain from making those jokes around Fenton, at least," he said instead, feeling somewhat defeated. "And if you can, try to keep the others at school from pressing him for answers. He doesn't need that kind of stress."
"We have to tell him what they're saying about you two," Sam objected. "He can't go into school blind to what's being said tomorrow."
"Yes," Phantom agreed, "he should know. But he doesn't need to hear his friends ridicule him."
"Ha, ouch?" Tucker said.
"We're just teasing you, Danny."
Phantom closed his eyes and sighed. "I know…"
Thankfully, Sam's house wasn't far, and it wasn't long before Phantom was descending toward her bedroom balcony. "For the record," he started, cautiously feeling his way through the words, "I don't think it's that crazy. Fenton and I aren't the same person like this."
"Except you sort of are," Sam said, "because it's only temporary. But if it makes you feel any better, Tucker and I are laughing at them, not you. Well, a little at you, but we still love you."
Tucker laughed. "Yeah, it's funny because they have no idea, you know? You made it just a little more plausible, and now they're literally jumping at shadows!"
Sam snickered too.
Phantom hummed. They had made it more than just "a little" plausible.
He landed on the balcony and carefully lowered Sam's legs, making sure she had enough support before he allowed her to take all her own weight onto her feet. He withdrew his touch, and she immediately appeared in the visible spectrum again, in time for Phantom to see her open her eyes.
"Thanks," she said, sighing the word out, "that would have been a long walk."
Her expression, the way she was staring upward…he would have to step carefully, wouldn't he? Sam had already warned him how often he flirted, unconsciously or not, and he didn't want to lead her on. With that in mind, he dismissed his initial response and said, "Anytime," as casually as he could.
She frowned, staring up where she thought he hovered—it wasn't, but she was close. She opened her mouth, but Phantom turned and flew back toward the hill. Instead of hearing her in person, he heard her speak from the earphone, "Is there really nothing we can say to convince you?"
"Good night, Sam," Phantom said. "Get some ice for that ankle."
She sighed.
"Wow, you know, for the loving half," Tucker said over the earphone, "you're not very romantic."
Phantom frowned. He angled higher into the sky until he could feel the wind pull his hair back along his head. "That is likely because I'm trying to not be romantic."
"Oh, so you do have feelings for Sam still? You're just trying not to act on them?"
"Tucker…" Sam growled over the line, proving she was still listening.
Phantom halted in midair, his muscles tensing. Far below him, the park's trees swayed gently in the wind and traffic raced along the roads. "I…"
"Oh, come on, Sam, he's the lover! If anybody would know it would be him, right?"
"Just leave it, Tucker."
"If you don't want to hear it you can just take out the earphone."
"I'm not just going to leave so you guys can talk about me!"
Phantom did not want to talk about this at all. "Why not?" he asked, his mind racing for an escape. "Sounds like you guys talk about me behind my back all the time. Or was the bet about Valerie and me something that just happened out of nowhere?"
"That's not the same thing," Sam objected.
"It kind of is, though."
"Hey," Tucker protested, "stop trying to change the subject."
Caught trying to do just that, Phantom made a face. "What subject?"
"The one about your feelings for Sam!"
"Which feelings, exactly?"
"Oh my god," Sam groaned. "Why are we even talking about this?"
"Because you deserve to know!" Tucker shouted.
Phantom winced, touching the earphone. He started flying again, heading toward the hill in hopes Tucker would be there. He pressed a hand to his temple and then pushed it into his hair, sighing. Tucker wasn't wrong, Sam deserved an explanation. There was only one problem.
"Look, I know Fenton and I had feelings for Sam in the past," Phantom said slowly, "but if you're asking me why nothing came of it, I am afraid I can't help you."
"In the past?" Sam asked, and for Phantom's sake, he tried not to hear how small her voice sounded.
"Back when Fenton and I were one," he explained. "As I am now, I'm sorry, but I don't feel anymore for you than I do for Tucker. You guys are my best friends and I am attracted to you both, but that is as far as it goes." He rubbed his thumb against his scalp, closing his eyes so he could think harder. "I know there had to be more than just attraction in the past, why else would we keep having those moments together? But I don't feel anything now. Even when I remember something that used to make us smile, I feel nothing. There is…there must be something that I am missing. So I can't help you."
Quietly, Tucker voice said over the earphone, "What the fuck?"
"But you still have feelings for Valerie?" Sam questioned.
"Yes," Phantom agreed. "In fact, when I think back on my memories of Valerie, my feelings for her are even clearer than they used to be. But even though I know we felt something for you before the split, I don't feel anything now. I don't even remember why we liked you. Friends, yes, but love? It was there, I'm sure it was, but as I am now I don't understand why we were drawn to you instead of, say, Tucker."
Tucker whistled.
"That doesn't make any sense!" Sam objected. "How can you remember you love her but not me?"
Phantom grimaced. This was one reason why he didn't want to discuss it. Especially long distance. He couldn't read Sam's body language, get a sense of how she was feeling through her expression. He wanted to lessen the blow as much as possible, but it was difficult like this.
"I don't know," he said. "I told you, there is…I'm missing something. Perhaps ask Fenton."
"Fenton?" Tucker asked. "Your human half? Why would he know and not you?"
"Probably because of the Ghost Catcher and the split personality thing?" Sam said. "But just because you two split doesn't mean…how can you not know how you were feeling only last week?"
"Or yesterday," Tucker corrected.
Because I am a different person today, Phantom thought, but it was a concept they wouldn't understand. Phantom didn't fully understand it himself. He could remember a time when he handed Sam a crystal, staring into her eyes, and…nothing. He only remembered blushing and smiling, so it must have been something similar to what he felt for Valerie or Fenton, but the feelings…if they were there at all, they had nothing to do with him.
He thought it might be because those emotions were Fenton's, not his, but there was one problem with that theory. That moment had been after their fight with Undergrowth, long before the thought of splitting themselves had ever crossed his or Fenton's mind. Phantom, as a person, had not even existed. How could he have a lack of feelings when he didn't even exist?
"But…." Tucker tried, "but you're the lover, right? Shouldn't you have all the romantic feelings?"
No, because if that were true, Fenton wouldn't struggle so hard against what Phantom suspected was Fenton's own attraction to him. "It might help you two," Phantom said, allowing some bitterness to bleed into his tone, "to stop seeing us as incomplete people. I am more than a lover just as Fenton is more than a fighter. He is just as capable of loving as I am."
"Uh, you know you're not actually a whole person like this, though, right?" Tucker asked. "Like, dude, we know how this goes."
"Yeah," Sam agreed. "That's not how the Ghost Catcher works. It splits your human and ghost half, but it also splits you into two extreme versions of yourself. Remember Fun and Super Danny?"
"Ha!" Tucker laughed. "That was a crazy weekend."
"You're not complete like this, Danny. It's unsustainable. You're only half a person because your other half, the fighter, is training with your parents and/or sleeping right now. It's why you can't stop flirting even though you apparently have no feelings for anyone other than Valerie."
Phantom rolled his eyes skyward. First he was too unromantic and now he was flirting too much? "If I could be only a lover and not a fighter like you're suggesting," he said, speaking slowly, "then how could I have brought down that behemoth during school? How could I have overpowered these two ghosts we just caught? How is it that I'm willing to patrol the city and protect our town instead of trying to hang out with the people I love?"
Sam and Tucker didn't seem to have a response for that, not an immediate one, anyway, so Phantom continued, "What is more, I am not intentionally flirting. Believe me, if I was flirting with intent, you would be able to tell the difference. There is a major difference whether you want to see it or not. If I was an insatiable flirt, willing to fall in love with anyone who caught my interest the way you're implying, would I not be actively making passes at you two? Or Paulina? Or anyone? Because if that were the case, I am behaving quite out of character, aren't I?"
An uneasy silence fell over their conversation. Phantom flew upon Lookout Hill, circled it a few times, but when he didn't see Tucker, he sighed quietly and descended on the tree, landing in the branches much more gracefully than before.
"All I am saying," he continued, "is that you two can't keep trying to fit Fenton and me into these neat little shapes you have cut out for us. We're not so easily defined by your expectations."
Sam made a strangled noise.
"But that doesn't really prove anything," Tucker said weakly. "I mean, even the Fun Danny was willing to help us fight Technus in the end."
"Yes," Phantom agreed pointedly, "he did help, didn't he? Proving he was more than just a fun dude with no morals in the process."
"Oh…"
"We had to convince him it would be fun, though," Sam countered. "You could be doing something similar. Maybe a lover personality is only devoted to one person—" If only… "—and maybe by fighting ghosts you're just trying to impress Valerie."
Phantom chewed on his bottom lip and thought guiltily to himself, More like Fenton…
Valerie would likely never know about Phantom's efforts, and she definitely didn't understand how difficult it was for him. Fenton would, though. Fenton had. Just the memory of his smile after Phantom succeeded in defeating the behemoth was enough to make Phantom feel slightly giddy.
"I suppose that is partly true," he said, reluctant, "but I stand by what I said."
"And ultimately what you're saying," Tucker asked, "is that if we want to know about your feelings for Sam, we should ask your human half? Who is a fighter? Because he is capable of love too?"
Phantom grimaced. Fenton wasn't going to like that, but… "Yes."
"You gotta admit, though. That sounds really weird, him knowing but not you."
Phantom plucked a leaf from the branch above him and twirled it between his thumb and finger, watching it spin. "I don't know," he said softly, allowing his head to rest against the tree trunk. "Perhaps it was only my human half who liked Sam all along."
"Danny," Sam said, a gentle emphasis on the name, "ghost half, human half? They're both you. You don't have to see yourself as one or the other."
"Except now, of course."
"…Except now," Sam conceded reluctantly, "but not back then and not in a few days."
Phantom hummed, and though she couldn't see it, he shrugged. He supposed there was no point worrying about it, since the separation was all temporary. But…if Fenton did have those strong feelings for Sam everyone insisted they once had…
Phantom sank further against the trunk, slouching his shoulders. He spun the leaf and determined not to think about it anymore. Phantom's own feelings on the matter aside, Fenton liking Sam would be a disaster for their relationship with Valerie. Just as Phantom was trying his best to be a hero, Fenton would try his best not to ruin things with Valerie. That was the deal. So nothing was going to happen between them when Sam confronted Fenton about his feelings. Fenton wouldn't allow it.
But he might want to, Phantom thought, something inside him twisting unpleasantly. He dropped the leaf and thumped his forehead against the tree. Stop it! he scolded himself.
"Question?" Tucker asked.
Eager to take his mind off Fenton, Phantom lifted his head. "Yes?"
"Does your human half remember your guys' feelings for Valerie? Because if you don't remember your feelings for Sam but he does, then wouldn't you remembering your feelings for Valerie mean that he doesn't?"
Phantom stared down at the grass, watching the blades sway in the breeze as he thought. "That…would make a lot of sense, actually. He isn't comfortable dating Valerie, but I assumed that was because romance in general made him uncomfortable. That could still be the reason, but…maybe."
"And suddenly, I don't feel so bad about being forgotten," Sam said sarcastically. "Doesn't make a lot of sense why your feelings would be divided between you two like that, or why the lover has feelings for someone who fights him while the fighter has your guys' feelings for your ultra supportive friend, aka me, but that must be one of those oddities about the Ghost Catcher, right?
Phantom rolled his eyes. "If you wish to look at it like that. But I think there is something deeper going on."
"Like what?" Tucker asked.
"Well…" Phantom ran his fingers through his hair, trying to think. "It's hard to explain, but there are these…gaps in my memories. Or not gaps, exactly, but they're harder to remember, and if I do remember, I don't always understand why we acted the way we did."
"By 'we' you mean you and your human half?" Tucker asked.
They had gotten better about understanding Phantom's use of the plural pronoun, but Phantom wasn't surprised they needed clarification now. It was an idea that had been itching at his mind for a while, and even he wasn't comfortable about where it was leading him. "Yes," he said. "Me and Fenton as a united person."
"Can you give us an example?" Sam asked.
Phantom chewed on his bottom lip as he thought. The portal accident jumped to mind, the whirling chaos that started the whole mess, but those memories were never very clear to begin with. He needed something bigger than, say, forgetting their locker combination in order for them to take it seriously.
"The day we fought Pariah Dark," Phantom began slowly, hesitant. "Do you remember what happened?"
Sam didn't respond. Neither did Tucker.
"I remember being angry about what happened to Valerie," Phantom continued, "I even remember exposing her to her father to protect her from using the suit. I remember talking to you guys on the roof. What I don't remember is what motivated us to fight the king. It is…it was insane, right? But we won somehow." He lowered his hand and stared down at his palm. "'We' won…"
Or had it been Fenton?
"You don't remember anything at all?" Tucker asked. "Not even Sam and I bringing you backup?"
He sounded hurt. Phantom's lips twitched. "Yes, alright, I remember you guys cramming numerous ghosts into the Specter Speeder for an express delivery."
Tucker whooped.
"But everything else? It is…frustratingly hazy."
"You think it's like what happened with your feelings?" Sam asked. "You think your memories were divided too?"
"It's not that the memories are gone exactly," Phantom said. "I can still access them. It is simply that I am disconnected from them. We stood before Pariah Dark in his throne room, we exchanged a few words, and then…my body moved."
"What, like someone else was controlling it?"
"Exactly like that." Phantom shifted against the tree, moving until he could pull his legs onto the branch and fold them to his chest. He didn't like the implications anymore than they did. "It's stupid, I know, my mind must be playing tricks on me, but it almost feels like Fenton fought Pariah Dark, not me. Fenton was the one who wanted to defend the town, he was the one who dared to challenge a king, and he was the one who saved everyone because it couldn't have been me. I don't remember moving."
One of his friends made a noise like they didn't like what they were hearing.
Phantom sighed. "The memory just feels more like I'm remembering a scene from a movie. I'm disconnected from it."
"That's…it's probably just because of the split," Sam said.
"Yeah, dude," Tucker added quickly. "Don't let it get to you. It's just because Fenton's the fighter, right? So a memory about fighting is probably just something you're not all that interested in."
"Maybe," Phantom conceded. "It is not the only fight I remember like that, so you might be right. But does it not seem strange? It's not as though Fenton and I existed as separate minds in one body during those fights. My memories should be unaffected by what happens in the present, shouldn't they?"
"…Uh," Tucker started, "is this why you've been going 'we' and 'us' so often? Because I kind of get it now."
Phantom cracked a smile. "It is very confusing for me too."
"I bet."
"It's like what's happening with your feelings for me and Valerie but on a wider scale," Sam said. "You said you remember doing stuff with me that used to be romantic but now you feel disconnected from it."
"Yes. I think it might be happening to Fenton too." Phantom tilted his chin up, the bark of the tree pulling at his hair and scratching along his scalp. "I haven't spoken to him about it, but one thing he seemed frustrated by on Monday was that he could not remember Valerie's favorite coffee."
"Well," Tucker said, "what's so surprising about that? Getting someone the right coffee is a tricky thing. You can't be expected to know every little thing about someone."
"Tucker…" Phantom closed his eyes and sighed. "Valerie hates coffee."
"Oh. So why was—"
"That's my point. Fenton was trying to remember something that didn't exist because he had forgotten one little detail. He fooled himself into believing it was a thing and then became frustrated with himself when he couldn't remember what was never true in the first place."
"Ah…"
"You should talk to Jazz about this," Sam said. "It's probably just the Ghost Catcher screwing with your mind, but she might know something about what's happening. She's supposed to be studying that sort of thing."
Phantom hummed. "Maybe." He would much rather talk to Fenton first. He needed to know if Fenton was experiencing the same difficulties and what his thoughts were on the matter before he admitted anything to Jazz. The problem was getting close enough to hold an actual, private conversation when Phantom's feelings made doing so dangerous and Fenton's discomfort around Phantom kept him from even considering it.
There was a lot they could talk about if Phantom could just get Fenton alone. Not even necessarily about them, their feelings for each other, though he wasn't opposed to addressing that little problem. No, they could talk about letting Sam and Tucker know, about their memories, about Valerie, about their freedom as separate individuals and about if Fenton missed being half ghost or if he enjoyed finally being fully human again…
He wanted to know Fenton's thoughts on so many things…
"I realize this is all very important stuff," Tucker said, his voice light-hearted to contrast the previous heavy topic, "but I need clarification on something you said earlier."
Phantom blinked his eyes open. He had said a great many things. "Okay, what do you need to know?"
"Well, you know, I just couldn't help hearing that, apparently, you find me attractive, Danny?"
The smug tone was clear even through the earphone. Phantom rolled his eyes but allowed himself to smirk. "Don't get a swelled head, Tucker. I said Sam was attractive too."
"Hey, hey, you can't go pulling back now! If you think I'm hot, it's all good. I tend to have that effect on people."
"Sure you do, Tucker," Sam said sarcastically.
"But, dude, seriously, does that mean you like guys?"
Phantom frowned. "Yes," he said, "and girls too, obviously. I mean, Valerie—"
Sam interrupted, exclaiming in both their ears, "Danny! Danny, you're bi too?!"
Phantom winced, rubbing his ear. "Yes?" he said, and then, "Wait, too?"
Tucker groaned, loudly dramatic. "Oh hell…I'm the straight friend…"
"Tucker," Sam said, lowering her voice, "Tucker, join us…"
"I don't like guys, Sam!"
"Become one with the pride, Tucker…"
Phantom laughed. "Join us, Tuck," he whispered sweetly, "break free from society's expectations and embrace yourself…"
"Oh, nice one," Sam laughed, "coming from you."
"I refuse! As the designated straight friend, I—"
"Tucker," Sam interrupted, "we'll be a trio of gays! We can go to pride and wear matching shirts!"
"Are you sure, Sam?" Phantom asked, grinning. "There will be a lot of bright colors."
"A protest of love, diversity, and acceptance is the most Goth thing ever, shut up, Danny."
He snickered.
"Anyway!" Tucker said loudly. "How long have you known? It's not just because of the Ghost Catcher, is it?"
Phantom shook his head, still smiling. "No, we have known for a while, but we were not interested in any guys, and it didn't seem all that important until—" He cut himself off.
"Until?" Tucker urged.
"Until we started dating Valerie," Phantom finished. Safe in his tree, he scowled at himself. He'd gotten too comfortable and forgotten their bisexuality was only part of the larger secret. "It's just something I'm more aware of now."
"What, because you have a girlfriend?"
Because he had a girlfriend and yet he couldn't stop thinking about kissing another boy. "Yes," he said, refusing to explain further.
"Why haven't you told us?" Sam asked. "I only told Tucker last weekend, but I was planning to tell you too before this whole thing started."
Phantom shifted against his tree. "I'm not sure. You may have to ask Fenton that as well, but…" He sighed. His bisexuality was important to his identity, especially now that he was crushing on Fenton, but by coming out…he had forced Fenton too as well, hadn't he? "Please," he said softly, "don't ask him. I don't think he is ready."
"He's you though," Tucker pointed out. "As soon as you guys merge on Friday, what difference does it make?"
Phantom blew out a breath. "It matters," he said forcefully. "If you wish to look at it as such, as divided halves of one person, consider I am the half that is ready to be myself openly whereas Fenton is the half that is still hesitating."
"I get it," Sam said, "and he's right, Tuck. Just because part of Danny has come out to us doesn't mean he's ready to go all in."
Phantom sighed. It wasn't the way he wanted them to understand, but…so long as they didn't force Fenton to admit something he wasn't ready for, so be it. "He may open up once he feels comfortable," he said. "There was a moment on Monday he was almost willing to say something."
"Maybe I should tell him about my sexuality," Sam suggested. "I know I would have come out to you a lot sooner if I had known."
"That might work, yes."
"I could kiss a girl in front of him," Sam continued, building steam. "Someone who is an out of the closet bi or lesbian…someone like," her voice turned sly, "you're girlfriend."
Phantom stiffened. "What?"
"Ha!" Tucker crowed. "I forgot! Valerie is bi isn't she?"
"She is," Sam said, smug, "and believe me, I noticed when she came out."
"Oh, I bet you did."
"Could you not kiss my girlfriend?" Phantom pleaded, wounded. "I thought we were friends, Sam."
"Afraid of some friendly competition, Danny?" Sam asked, still teasing.
"Our relationship is a little rocky right now, so yes."
"That's your own fault," Sam pointed out, merciless. "But don't worry, I'll wait until you two break up."
"Oh. Wow," Phantom deadpanned. "Thanks. You are so generous. Truly."
Sam snickered. "I try."
"Joking aside," Tucker said. "How do we make your human half feel more comfortable around us?"
"You could start by using the names we've chosen for each other," Phantom said, rolling his eyes. "He prefers to go by Fenton. I go by Phantom."
"Uh…okay, but you're both Danny anyway, so…"
Phantom groaned and knocked the back of his head against the tree.
"What does it matter, anyway?" Sam added. "We're just using your first name instead of your last."
And normally, such as with Valerie, Jack, and Maddie, that was fine. But Sam and Tucker knew about their shared past as one person. They knew both Fenton and Phantom as Danny. Using their last names when there were two Danny's would simply make things easier, but they were deliberately choosing to make things harder by refusing to acknowledge there was a difference now.
And Phantom had asked her to. Twice.
"Other than the name thing," Tucker said, "can you think of anything else? I mean, you would know better than anyone else how to make yourself comfortable."
Phantom blew out a breath and stared up at the leafy canopy. His glow illuminated the leaves and tree branches above him, brightening an otherwise dark enclosure. "As it happens," he said slowly, "I may be the last person you should be asking. Surely you two noticed how tense he was around me?"
"Yeah, what was up with that?" Tucker asked. "It's like you had him spooked or something."
"Or something," Phantom agreed, his lips twitching.
"He seemed kind of scared of you."
"He may have been."
"Why would he be afraid of you?" Sam asked. "Unless you're hiding something from us, you're nothing like that evil jerk of a future self. Aren't you his other half? What's there to be afraid of?"
"Only when we're merged," Phantom corrected. "As we are now, he and I are as much strangers to one another as I am to you. Probably more. I wouldn't mind looking like a fool in front of either of you, but if Fenton made a mistake in front of me, like, say, he tripped and fell face-first into the dirt? It would be the height of embarrassment for him. So he moves carefully around me, questioning his every move, never wanting to make a mistake that might make me laugh at him like—"
Like Valerie had.
Phantom blinked at the leaves, sat up from the trunk and breathed in slowly, deeply, as realization dawned.
Valerie's laughter had been what pushed Phantom to kiss and practice kissing on Fenton, so he had assumed Fenton's semi-willingness to go along with their plans meant he felt the same. But Phantom had only done it to prove himself to Valerie. Fenton had only ever seemed interested in proving himself to Phantom, especially after the second separation on Saturday.
And if most of his clumsiness and awkward, halting actions stemmed from his desire to not make a fool of himself in front of Phantom like they had in front of Valerie the day she laughed at them…
Phantom sank back against the tree. How long has Fenton seen me the way I see Valerie? he wondered, feeling as though he had just been punched.
That was why he had been hurt when Phantom hadn't trusted him with the date. That was why he had behaved so aggressively, storming out of Valerie's apartment, keen to lick his wounds in private instead of admitting to Phantom he had failed. It was why he had looked to Phantom the way he had, like he was desperately looking for forgiveness and approval all at once, and why, though he had tried to hide the thoughts from Phantom when they were one, the meteor shower had meant so much to him. Why Phantom's distance the day after had hurt him.
He likes me, Phantom thought in wonder. The leaves rustled in the wind, their illuminated undersides flashing as they fluttered. Phantom breathed out and thought the words again, he likes me…
He had suspected there was something, but…he had assumed the merge was when Fenton started developing feelings, possibly more due as a response to Phantom's interest than anything Fenton felt on his own, and maybe that was still true, but there was more Fenton had been hiding from him.
Fenton wanted Phantom's respect, his approval. That couldn't be the case if Fenton only saw Phantom as the other half of himself the way he claimed. What was more, he had wanted those things long before the idea Fenton could be his own person had ever crossed Phantom's mind.
Phantom laughed softly to himself, lifting one hand to run his fingers through his hair. No wonder he punched me, he thought. He didn't see me as another version of himself. He saw me as a stranger, albeit one he…
Liked. Looked up to. Respected.
What had Phantom done to earn such regard? And so early on?
That first kiss…?
"Uh, Danny?" Sam called out. "You still there?"
Phantom cleared his throat. "Yes. I just…realized something."
"About your human half?"
Phantom pinched his eyes closed, his free hand clenching into a fist. "Please stop calling him that. Call him Danny or Fenton or Danny Fenton, just stop referring to us as if we are not real people." Before they could argue, he quickly spoke again, "And yes, about Fenton. But it's not something I want to talk about right now."
"Uh, okay?" Tucker said. "You sure?"
"Yes. How far away are you?"
"I'm almost there. I just need to climb the hill."
Phantom nodded and sighed. Good. Before, Phantom had wanted to stretch his time with Tucker and Sam as long as possible, but…he needed to think.
The giddy sensation in his chest was bubbling over, spilling into a butterfly sensation around his middle. All he wanted to do was rethink everything that had happened between him and Fenton, using this new realization as a key to unlock Fenton's behavior, but there was a bigger problem threatening to snuff it all out.
After all, there was a reason Fenton had denied feeling anything, why he was struggling so hard against what he was feeling. Nothing had really changed. They were still meant to be one person, not two. They were still intending to merge on Friday.
But now I'm sure he likes me. Phantom taped his fingers on the cap of the Fenton Thermos and smiled. He is going through the same thing I am, only he is responding to it in his own way.
I'm not alone in this.
I kind of spoiled this realization in the author's notes a few chapters back, but here's the in-story version. Fenton has been falling for Phantom longer than he's been showing. It's more obvious to us now because the merge 1) made it brutally honest to Fenton that what he's feeling is not entirely platonic, no matter how much he denies it, and 2) Fenton learned Phantom reciprocated those feelings and that changes how he feels in turn. But, to be clear, they're not in love. Not...yet...What I'm aiming for is that, like, fragile feeling after you meet someone? A crush to me is something that starts as "hey this person is interesting" "I want to know what they think about this" "I hope they're impressed by me" "They're cute..." sort of stuff. Idk guys, I'm aro/ace, I'm trying! xD
If anyone is worried, Sam is Danny's/Fenton's/Phantom's best friend (along with Tucker) first and foremost. I'm not going to bash her or the DxS ship. Like, I won't lie, I don't like their ship, but I want to respect it and the role their relationship played in canon and on their characters. I didn't want to pretend it never happened. So Phantom and Fenton are going to be letting her down gently. Because they're friends first and I don't bash. (I'm also not going to ship her with anyone else, even tho I would LOVE to let her and Valerie get together here. Just. For the record ;3 But yeah, it's not what anyone came into this story for so we're not going there, and anyway I don't think it'd be a very nice thing to do outside of teasing. BUT IMAGINE-)
Next chapter is a bit iffy because I have to figure out how I want to tackle it, but hopefully it will be up as quickly as this one! I am SO ready for these two to interact again, I feel you, Phantom. We all need this
As always, I had a lot to say but I can't remember more than half xD I'm staying safe, or as safe as I can. My mom had cancer last year and she lives with me, so this is a tense time, but we're taking things one day at a time. I hope all of you and your loved ones stay safe as well, but all I can do to help right now is offer you this chapter and hope it brightens your day a little
So stay safe, and thank you for reading!
AAND HOLY SHIT YOUR COMMENTS
I LOVE YOU gUYS