(Inside Pierre, 7:04 AM)
Another groggy groan drones out from the bed piled with bodies tangled about, the first one up being Rin, her hair now all puffed up like a bale of cotton.
"... Why does my head feel all... hefty-"
She brushes her hands on the top of her hair, and feels a massive ball of fluff in her original hair's place.
Rin lets out a shrill scream, waking everyone else up in the pseudo-Reality Marble.
"WHAT THE HELL!?" Luvia screamed back. "A LADY NEEDS HER-"
She immediately stops what she was about to say upon seeing a fuzzy-looking afro resembling an unpeeled chestnut on Rin's head, causing her to burst into laughter.
"Wha-WHAT'S SO FUNNY-"
Rin then stifles her laughter as she saw Luvia's own hair rise up like a bundle of weed on a lawn.
"... Ugh, what's going on." Bazett groaned out as she emerged from the sheets. "Can you two keep it down-"
The two then look towards Bazett, whose hair was now like that of a certain Irish Lancer's, with her looking at the two young heiresses, both of their hairs more akin to works of abstract modern art than actual hair.
All three of them begin laughing uncontrollably at each other like hyenas at the sight of each of their ridiculous hairdo (and possibly insanity rooted from a prolonged period of confinement with each others' company).
"Ugh..." Jordan grumbled out from the shag carpet floor, peeking his head up to the bed above. "... The bloody hell's going on here?"
The three women then look at Jordan's hair, now a literal scale-model of a full-bodied lion took place of his hair.
The three of them laugh at the man's literal lion-hair, with Jordan rolling his eyes at their laughter in slight annoyance.
"Not the first time that it happened..." Jordan sighed out. "... I'll be at the wash if anyone needs me."
Sakura then wakes up amidst the laughter, rubbing her eyes before letting out a yawn.
"... What's going on?" Sakura yawned out. "Why's everyone laughing-"
As she reached out her hand, a jolt stings her hand upon closing in on the Irish Designator, causing both of them to recoil back.
"Ow!" Sakura exclaimed. "... What's going on?"
She then spots the three women next to her in varying degrees of hairstyles.
"... And why are all of your hairs look like they come out of Shinji's JUMP Magazines?"
"Morning..." Taiga yawned out as she crawled out of the bed's underside.
The four look down at the schoolteacher, now their being two tufts of hair sticking out from the top of her head like a pair of cat ears.
"... What's with your hairs?" Taiga remarked. "Why's there so much static around here?"
The laughing girls then stop laughing as they felt the air around them feel more... electrocuting.
"... What's going on outside?"
Before Taiga can say anything more, Jordan comes back out to get a cup of water before going back into the bathroom.
"... For fuck's sake, lady, can you stop sleeping in the washtub?" Jordan remarked as he went in with the cup of water. "Although, I think your lass sleeping on the table isn't any better... or worse."
He then lets out an exasperated sigh.
"... God damn it all, I'm literally going mad."
(Just 3 Miles Outside of Whataburger, Arkansas, United States, 7:07 AM)
"FUCK FUCK FUCK! FIND COVER!"
Red and bright-blue lightning rain down from the dark heavens above, as two unparalleled geniuses of a once (thought-to-be) divine construct, now clashing against each other like pair of wrathful gods of old.
The air around them crackled with raw electricity, their individual strands of hair now standing on their ends, their lungs burning, as if they were breathing in sulfur, toasting their air sacs steadily, and burning through their throats.
"WHERE DO WE GO!?" Shinji's head cried out over the booming thunder above their heads. "THERE'S NO COVER HERE!"
"FIND A DITCH!" Abel cried out. "THEN CURL UP INTO BALL IN IT! UZURA GAKURE NO JITSU! UZURA GAKURE NO JITSU-"
A red bolt of lightning strikes Abel, shocking him where he stood.
The burnt body then falls to the ground in a charred, vaugely-humanoid-looking lump of coal.
"... Well, shit." Monica cursed. "Dad's curse had to act up now..."
"Wait, CURSE!?" Shinji's head squawked out.
The three then leap into an open ditch, and Monica proceeds to curl herself into a ball, facing down.
"His immortality... is kind of the same case with his brother's." Monica explained through her muffled voice. "Whereas the elder was cursed with perpetual aging in exchange for complete invincibility, my dad was cursed to die excruciatingly painful deaths before each reincarnation."
"Is that why both of the brothers, since the cusp of Genesis, are so fucking insane?" Kiritsugu's head snarked as he sucked on his still-lit cigarette.
"Hey, I'm no one to judge a person's life choices." Monica remarked, her voice muffled from her head being tucked into her arms and chest. "Just like you two, I did things that I kinda regret doing in hindsight."
The two talking heads look at each other in confusion.
"... I have no regrets." Shinji's head remarked.
"Liar." Both Monica and Kiritsugu retorted.
"... OH SHUT UP! I'M ONLY HUMAN!" Shinji retorted back before looking down on this neck without a human body. "... Or at least... I was."
"Then get over yourself, you damn seaweed." Monica spoke out. "And make yourself damn useful, AND THINK OF SOMETHING!"
"HEY, THAT'S YOUR JOB!"
"I AIN'T PAYIN' YOUR ASSLESS ASS TO GIVE ME LIP, BOY!"
More lightning rain down upon around the ditch, striking down the last power line near them, causing the burnt shaft to crash down over the ditch that the three of them were in, pinning them down.
"... Okay, there goes our last lightning rod." Monica grumbled out as she tried to adjust her body to her current situation. "Any volunteers?"
Outside the ditch, Edison with his (stolen/"improved") Mystic Code, [Columbia], flies up towards the dark clouds raining down blood-red lightning from above, dodging and maneuvering out of the way with precision and grace, and from Monica's observation...
... Like the Freedom Gundam from Gundam SEED.
"Oh great, he's even rippin' off Jesus Yamato." Monica rolled her eyes at Edison's aerial maneuvers. "... Then again, in America, nothing is sacred. Just ask South Park."
In all fairness, she herself was genuinely impressed with Trey Parker and Matt Stone's efforts to give the middle finger to MPAA through South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut. Off by one swear word, and went out in style.
... The definition of a guilty pleasure-
*CRASH*
A stray bolt of lightning crashes right next to the ditch that she was in, frying a patch of earth dull-black.
"... Okay, Monica." She muttered to herself. "Remind yourself that you're roughly 40% metal with 50% synthetic flesh and 10% computer parts from Best Buy, and lightning equals a burnt battery at best..."
She then takes off her left forearm off her elbow and upon hearing a rumble, she tosses the arm up into the air, causing the lightning to strike the thrown metal arm rather than her own body below it instead.
Monica smiles as her arm plopped right above her head in a burnt heap of ashen scrap and scorched synthetic sinew.
"... I think I have an idea." Monica remarked as she looked at the two talking heads.
She then unbuckles the heads from her waist, and drags the heads closer towards her.
"What are you doing!?" Shinji stuttered out in a panicky tone while Kiritsugu blows out the last smoke from his cigarette. "Don't you FUCKING DARE-"
She then clasps the two chains around her teeth.
"GOING UP!"
She jumps back up to her feet, crouches down as far as her mechanical knees can take her, right before she springs up into the air like a rocket into the darkened skies and towards Edison.
"WHAT IN THE BLAZES-"
"HEADS UP, AMERICAN FURRY!"
A red bolt of lightning comes down from the dark clouds, and as the bolt arcs towards between the Caster and the magical cyborg, Monica links up the two chained talking heads by the ends of their chains, and tosses the two heads above her head like a pair of bola.
The lightning then redirects its arc towards the chained heads, shocking the two heads in Monica's place, allowing her to mount the Caster on his back in the air.
"UP! NOW!" Monica cried.
"You know, if you wanted a ride, you could've asked."
The Caster then flies up towards the clouds as the two heads fall back down towards the ground.
Upon landing back into the ditch, their charred head regenerate back to their normal selves.
"Oww..." Shinji winced out. "... I literally can't feel my face."
"Now you've just noticed?" Kiritsugu pointed out with a raised eyebrow.
The ex-hitman sees the humanoid lion and the one-armed cyborg break through the clouds and fly towards the blue above.
"... You know, I was once a participant in the previous Grail War, and I thought I saw the worst it had to offer-"
"Don't say it." Shinji grumbled out.
As the two heads continue to regenerate their burnt tissues while looking up at the skies above, Caster Edison and Monica fly through the electrified clouds above, dodging through arcs and nets of red lightning that were interwoven inside the dark clouds.
"COME OUT AND FACE ME LIKE A MAN, YOU COWARD!" Edison roared out as he and Monica flew around the arcs and bolts of red lightning.
"Just what is a man..." A booming and rumbling voice like thunder echoed through the clouds. "... TO A BEING WHOSE EXISTENCE SURPASSES THAT OF GODS!?"
More crimson bolts of divine wrath scream towards the pair, Edison using his [Columbia] to maneuver away from their trajectory with precision and grace, as the stray bolts crashed down to whatever was left standing tall in the flatlands below.
"For someone who surpasses that of so-called 'Gods', you're sorely lacking in creativity." Edison snarked out.
"I need not to stoop down to your level, you damned thief." Tesla retorted. "You are but mere fly compared to my brilliance!"
"God, are all you scientists potential egomaniacs?" Monica remarked as she rolled her eyes. "... Then again, if dad did it, then then the answer to any judgement on human morals, are an astounding 'yes'."
More bolts and arcs of lightning continue to rain down towards them, with Edison continuing to maneuver around the hails of electricity while Monica herself was hanging onto the Caster's back for her dear life, trying not to get shocked in the process, even going far as to purge metal parts of her body to redirect the lightning that brushes too close to her.
"... What is this, Sin and Punishment: Successor of the Earth?" Monica groaned out as she tried to force her eyesight to readjust to the hyperbolic pace of the crazy-ass aerial maneuvers that Edison was pulling off to elude Tesla's bolts.
"ARGH! WE AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE AT THIS POINT!" Edison loudly remarked as he continued to fly around the thunderbolts. "MISS, ANY SUGGESTIONS!?"
Monica then stops to think for a moment, only for her thoughts to be cut short upon noticing a bolt of lightning descending towards her in a split second.
In a moment of haste, Monica purges her other arm from its socket and flings the dislocated arm off towards above, causing the lightning to prematurely strike down and shock the loose arm in her intended place.
"... ABOVE THE CLOUDS, NOW!" Monica pointed out. "GO WHERE THE LIGHTNING'S COMING FROM!"
"BEST YOU HOLD TIGHT, MISS!" Edison remarked as he accelerated towards the eye of the thunderstorm.
The two then speed up, flying towards the epicenter where the tempest was being generated from.
"GRIT YOUR TEETH, LADY! WE'RE GOING INTO A LIGHTNING STORM!"
"NO HANDS! TEETH CLENCHED!" Monica replied. "BRING IT ON!"
The two then break into the mass of gathering darkened clouds.
Upon entering, the two find themselves in a pristine, clear-blue skies, a complete contrast to the tempest that the two were flying though.
"... Huh, guess it's true." Monica remarked. "The eye of the storm is the most quiet..."
"Almost too quiet..." Edison remarked. "... Where in the blazes is that Tesla!?"
"Behind you."
Monica turns her head, only to find a brass-colored clockwork arm impaled through her stomach.
"... Please don't shock me." Monica pitifully begged. "I only have one working battery left."
"Then say the AC is better than DC." Tesla remarked.
"... You mean the band-"
*ZAP*
Monica's whole body goes completely flaccid.
"Now it's just you and me, Edison." Tesla sneered out. "But since we're gentlemen, how about our introductions before our long-awaited confrontation?"
"Suit yourself." Edison growled out menacingly with his leonine visage. "I am the King of Inventors, Caster-class, Thomas Edison, 'The Columbia Reincarnate'!"
"Then I am the True God of Lightning, Berserker-class, Nikolas Tesla Alter, 'The Mad Brilliance'!" Tesla Alter roared out as crimson bolts of lightning emitted from Monica's hanging body, transforming her into a bow frame connecting her head and ankles with a strand of electricity. "I WILL STRIKE YOU DOWN JUST AS THE ALMIGHTY DID TO SATAN; LIKE LIGHTNING!"
Tesla then pulls back the red strand of electricity, forming a javelin of red lightning before shooting the bolt at the Caster.
Edison however, simply catches the bolt between his index and middle finger.
"You forget, Tesla..." Edison grinned back. "You may be the so-called 'God of Lightning'..."
The bolt of crimson lightning shatters in Edison's grasp.
"... But I put the word 'light', in LIGHTNING!"
Edison then fires out several bolts of technicolor beams of light from his hands towards the Alter.
Tesla Alter parries the beams of rainbow-colored light away from him by erecting a sphere of condensed static electricity around himself, redirecting the beams of color away from him upon contact of the defensive barrier.
"So much for your 'light' to my 'lightning'." Tesla boasted. "But enough of that! HAVE AT YOU!"
The two geniuses then charge towards each other, their combined impact clearing the dark skies around them, the gray-black clouds dissipating as another, even more intense tempest akin to a bomb that's about to go off begins to form at the former eye of the storm, now starting to form a greater storm anew.
The two talking heads see the two comets of light streaking across the clear blue skies above, flashing and clashing against each other, blinding them with each gleam and shine from the attacks above.
"Wait..." Shinji mumbled out as he squinted through the flashes above. "... Is that the Terminator bitch impaled through someone's arm!?"
Kiritsugu then tries to squint through the ball of light, seeing a humanoid silhouette acting as someone's bow.
"... Seems like it." Kiritsugu commented.
"HA! TAKE THAT, YOU SORDID BITCH!" Shinji cheered out.
"Then who's going to get us out of this ditch?" The ex-hitman pointed out. "Last I checked, we don't have hands or magic."
Shinji's eyes then immediately widen upon hearing the revelation.
"... Oh my god, we're gonna die here." Shinji whimpered out. "We're going to become food for the passing maggots!"
"It's not so bad." Kiritsugu mellowly remarked. "I don't care how I go out as long as it ends all the same. That and well, we're already dead."
"BUT I'M STILL HERE!" Shinji shrieked out as he began to flail and hyperventilate in the existential panic that he's going through as of now.
"Get used to it, kid." Kiritsugu remarked.
From above, the two servants continue to clash with sparks emitting from each of their blows, neither relenting in their blows.
"FALL, TESLA!"
"IN YOUR DREAMS, EDISON!"
Another bolt of lightning booms across the clear sky.
"... So tell me, Tesla." Edison huffed out. "... Feeling your age yet?"
"I am in... way better... shape... then you..." Tesla retorted. "I planned out every single moment in my life... all that my pursuit of mankind's future..."
"Clearly... you didn't account for me... didn't you?" Edison heaved out.
"... So you finally admit that you... stole from me?" Tesla grinned.
"America is a capitalistic nation... for a reason..." Edison grinned. "... I simply capitalized... on your success... all to give... what the people need."
"Your slimy wit... deserves to be at an oil drill... down South." Tesla retorted. "Your 'future'... is awfully short-term... whereas I... planned every moment in the future... for mankind's prosperity."
"You're the fool..." Edison remarked. "Playing god... since the beginning... How presumptuous of you... it's almost fitting."
The clear skies once more darken as the tempest begins to reform, the thunder drumming in the inky veils in abyssal booms, rhythmic to an intensifying heartbeat.
... Even the two heads, who were stripped of life and human dignity, knew, for sure, with absolute certainty, that the coming storm was alive.
"... If I had a working bladder right now, I would've certainly peed myself." Shinji dryly remarked.
"Shut up and watch, kid." Kiritsugu remarked. "Burn every second of this into your memory, for it'll be the last thing we'll ever see before we embark on our slow drift towards oblivion."
The thunder booms as streaks of crimson lightning trails the darkened skies above. Two geniuses, one only remembered as a mad intellect and a failure belonging to that of occultists, the other, a hero who's conquered the darkness with his ingenuity, now face against each other in this fated confrontation, in the domain that the two of them sought to conquer ever since their youths, all to usher in a bright future for their fellow man.
... A cruel twist of fate, that brought these two bright minds against each other, now but mere dogs fighting over the last scrap of glory and recognition.
"I HAD IT WITH YOU, TESLA!" Edison roared out as he gathered all the surrounding mana that he can muster into his hands pointed towards [Columbia]'s core. "WE SETTLE THIS NOW!"
"I COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF!" Tesla roared out as the crimson bolts of electricity whirled around him "I'LL END YOUR LEGACY ONCE AND FOR ALL, EDISON!"
The storm above the two heads intensely concentrate into a singularity, reheating the air around them, hot enough to scorch any unfortunate dry patch of grass below.
"Hot hot hot hot hot!" Shinji yelped out. "WE'RE GONNA BE FRIED TO DEATH!"
"... Feels warm." Kiritsugu deadpanned with a small smirk.
"NOW BEHOLD, MY MAGNUM OPUS!" Edison declared. "[WORLD FAITH DOMINATION-INDUSTRIAL REVOLUTION]!"
"FEEL THE POWER OF MY BRILLIANCE!" Tesla boldly declared while a massive beam of rainbow light edged closer towards him as he extended his body-impaled arm towards it. "[SYSTEM KERAUNOS REVISED-THEKÏKÓS DRIVE], ACTIVATE!"
Tesla then releases his red thunder towards the beam of rainbow light, clashing agains each other, each one attempting to overtake the other in a show of force to determine which was the better of the two intellects.
"THIS IS NOTHING, TESLA!" Edison roared out. "I CAN DO MORE THAN YOU!"
"I SIMPLY NEED THIS ONE TO END YOU, EDISON!"
The two continued to push back and forth, with the sole witnesses being the two heads watching from below.
"OLD FART, WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY GETTING THIS MUCH MANA FROM!?" Shinji cried. "SUCH A THING SHOULD NOT BE EVEN POSSIBLE WITHOUT A MASTER!"
Kiritsugu squints into the lightshow and finds faint traces of mana flowing into their Saint Graphs.
"It's subtle, but I think it's their respective Mystic Codes." Kiritsugu surmised. "The real problem is, where did the other get his?"
"WELL, FOR STARTERS, I DON'T RECALL ANY MAGI TAKING UP ANY TECH CLASES!" Shinji pointed out. "... Wait, DON'T TELL ME-"
"That you think the other servant made his own Mystic Code that's currently on him?" Kiritsugu remarked at the Berserker's pulsating red core strapped onto his chest. "You have to give some credit to the more modern servants. They lack in mana output due to their raw age, but if they're anything, it's that they tend to get extra-creative."
Shinji just gives him a flat look.
"... What? Bullets travel a lot faster then gandrs." Kiritsugu pointed out. "Wait, don't tell me that you've attempted magecraft in the past... despite lacking in that prowess?"
"Bite me, old fart."
"I would if I could." The ex-hitman remarked as he rolled his eyes.
Meanwhile, the two epitomes of "insufferable geniuses" continued to clash each other's lightning against another's.
"JUST DIE ALREADY, TESLA!" Edison roared out.
"MAKE ME!"
... For the so-called "gentlemen", the two's arguments has now been reduced to that of a playground children's prattle.
Such is the folly of pride...
"... Right before the fall."
The two servants then look at Monica, still impaled through Tesla Alter's arm, bends over, and nabs a metal briefcase chained around her skirt.
"WHAT!?" The two gawked out.
Monica grins through her teeth grabbing the suitcase's handle before swinging the whole suitcase own head against Tesla Alter's head.
"WHAT THE-"
Tesla Alter is then absorbed into the briefcase, his Saint Graph disappearing from the face of the earth.
"Oh thank you for getting rid of that sordid annoyance-"
Monica then swings her head back towards Edison hard as she could, letting go of the handle at the last minute from her teeth, causing the suitcase to fly towards Edison's own head before hitting him on his own head, causing him to disappear on contact.
"Okay, secured two super-powered servants without hands..." Monica remarked as she suddenly realizes that she was lacking hands to pull her parachute that she'd packed early on. "... And not a single way to mitigate a very, very, hard, fall. ... Way to go, genius. You thought it through, didn't cha?"
Monica then begins screaming in her descent towards a very, very, very, hard landing.
"... Hey." Shinji remarked. "Is it just me, or do I see something falling-"
*THUD*
Monica's broken body lands into the same ditch where Shinji and Kiritsugu's heads were, her hammered legs cuddling Kiritsugu's face in her crotch, and her broken bust akin to a bag carrying shards of broken glass, now pressed against Shinji's face.
"Oww..." All three of them groaned out from the ditch.
Monica then looks at the magically-reinforced glass bowl with the turtle familiar in it.
"Oh good, it's still functioning..." Monica sighed out in relief. "... Help's that it's not exactly a turtle or anything... I honestly don't know how animal familiars work. At least servants, you can converse with them like normal people."
"Either way, we're all stuck here, waiting for the vultures or the fucking wolves to come for us!" Shinji whined out. "I don't wanna die here!"
"Miss, would you mind edging me closer towards the boy?" Kiritsugu asked.
Monica shrugs as she jostles her hip towards Kiritsugu's head, causing him to roll right next to Shinji.
"Thank you."
*CHOMP*
The ex-hitman then bites the boy onto his nose, casing the seaweed-haired boy to start screaming his non-existent lungs out.
"WHAT THE FUCK, YOU OLD FART!?" Shinji screeched out in his sole interval between his screams and yipes of pain, much to Monica's regret, now that her worst-case scenario was to simply wait for her batteries to run dry in company of two broken ex-humans whose minds are now completely lost.
"... Can this day get any worse?" Monica remarked as she rolled her eyes.
Suddenly, she hears a lone police siren sounding towards their way.
"... Me and my big fucking mouth." Monica grumbled out. "Of course the people at Whataburger called us as soon as they heard and reported gunfire at the parking lot... I just hope that they aren't still mad at me for what I pulled back at 98'."
The sirens then continue to blare right before the sounds of the car's tires screeching to a halt was heard, followed up by the sounds of two doors opening and closing from the car above the ditch.
"... I think I hear screaming. Might be the suspects from Whataburger's parking lot." One of the cops in a blue, wide-brimmed 10-gallon hat remarked as he drew out his Beretta 92FS from his underbreast holster. "Cover me."
The two cops then slowly walk down towards the ditch where Monica and the two heads were at, guns out and aimed down their barrels.
"This is the police!" The cop in the front stated as he undid his gun's safety. "Come out and put your hands up... in the... air..."
The cop then slows his word upon finding a robot girl and two talking heads in it, all three just staring at the now-frightened cop.
"... Hi?" Monica sheepishly remarked at the freaked out-cop.
"Wha-WHAT THE FUCK-"
*BANG*
*THUD*
The rear cop's own gun fired a shot through the cop in front of him, the latter now rolling down into the same ditch that the three were in, his head now sporting a bloody hole coming right between his eyes.
"Hey dad." Monica remarked at the cop with the smoking gun from the ditch below. "... Sorry about the mess."
"You got a shovel on ya?" The cop stated as he took off his own hat, revealing Abel's snow-white hair and blood-red pupils beneath.
"Hollow section near my upper spine." Monica grinned as she struggled to get back up to her feet. "... No hands though. Lost those in the War of the Currents 2, the Electric Boogaloo."
Abel lets out a huff before taking Monica, Shinji, Kiritsugu, and Pierre (still alive in his fishbowl) over his shoulder before putting them into the police car.
"... I'd figured." Abel remarked as he took out a shovel from Monica's [Pocket] near her upper spine cavity. "... Silver lining, should be a smooth sailing to New York, all things considered. Meantime, you three catch some extra Zs... while bury the body."
"You just killed a fucking cop, you know that?" Shinji pointed out the obvious.
"Oh please, he was an asshole." Abel remarked as he piled dry dirt and gravel onto the dead cop in a shallow grave by the collapsed power line. "Pulled over one of my contacts and planted 5 grams of weed into his trunk and arrested him on the spot before I bailed him out. Sonofabitch had it comin'."
Shinji looks toward the ex-hitman for any semblance of reason left around him.
"... Welcome to America, kiddo." Kiritsugu deadpanned. "Things have been steadily getting worse since they elected Reagan as president."
"Monica, you have an RC and a C4 on ya?" Abel asked out as he piled more dirt into the ditch housing the dead body. "Former needs to be on autopilot!"
"Breast cavity, second one in the left!" Monica cried out from the car seat. "The C4 is already taped onto it!"
"Attagirl." Abel remarked as he dragged the shovel and the metal briefcase with two recently-captured servants in it back to the car.
After the body of a dead cop was covered up, the police car was then gutted of its GPS tracker and taped onto an RV as the police car was driving away in the opposite direction of the RC's location.
The police car then transmutes into a regular civilian Ford Focus 2002, driving Eastward towards New York, leaving behind the lightning-ridden warscape behind them.
"... By the way, where is that RC going?" Shinji asked.
"You really don't wanna know."
(Abel's Mindscape, Unknown Time)
"... Ugh... I guess it's our turn now." A slimy voice remarked throughout the vantablack. "... I remember people's minds being a lot more cluttered back at 94'."
"... Hm, you're right." Iri remarked at the empty void. "... The whole place... it feels... too clean."
"Well, since people were coming, I cleaned it up myself." A quasi-British accented voice echoed out. "... What? Even I know how to be a proper host, is it so surprising?"
"I wouldn't call forcible confinement hospitable, especially when you put all of us in the same room." Ahriman pointed out.
"Well it was either that, or I emulate The Castaway." The deep-accented voice replied.
"Oh come on." Ahriman scoffed. "I've been in people's minds enough time to the point whatever they hide, their deepest insecurities, their greatest fears, or their most shameful kinks, I've practically seen it all at this point-"
The vantablack then suddenly transforms into a cavern, with a young, Arab boy in rags being guided by a lone man, its features completely obscured by a massive cloak draped over its whole body.
Abel himself was nowhere to be found, leaving the two to wander around their new location.
"... Well this is unexpected."
"Oh my god, is that you?" Iri pointed towards the boy in rags guided by the cloaked figure.
"Psh, that scrawny brat?" Ahriman scoffed. "... Actually, why does he look so... familiar? Me, All of the World's Evil, having a past?"
The two then disappear further into the caverns.
Out of curiosity, the two then follow them further in.
"... Hmm, does this place remind you of anywhere?" Iri asked the magical parasite coming out from her right earhole.
"... Yeah." Ahriman remarked. "The exact same shithole that the Greater Grail was kept in. Where I was kept in, for countless decades."
"Look!" Iri pointed ahead, towards the two figures standing right by a glowing ledge.
The two of them peered behind a rock as they eavesdropped on the two figures.
"... Just what the fuck are they saying?" Ahriman asked.
"Shh!" Iri shushed. "Listen!"
The two of them hear the two converse in Persian.
"(Listen, boy.)" The cloaked figure remarked at the youngster in an aloof tone. "(Just as there is good in this world, there must be evil that exists to counter it, all in the name of universal balance.)"
"(So is that why there are bad people in this world, master?)" The boy asked. "(Is that why I was driven out by those people from my home, even if I didn't live like them?)"
Suddenly, the two feel the caverns go subzero-cold.
"(... No.)" The "master" replied. "(It is because you were born in the first place is why you were driven out, all for this very moment.)"
The cloaked master then punts the boy over the edge, followed up by the sounds of water splashing and acidic hissing.
"(AHHH! IT BURNS! IT BURNS!)" The boy screamed out in utter agony as the sounds of his flesh and skin being melted off of him filled the caverns. "(WHY!? WHY!?)"
The "master" then takes off its hood, revealing Abel's face underneath.
"(... So that you may become what you were destined to be.)" The Abel-lookalike remarked. "(Let my betrayal blacken your heart, let my treachery stain your soul like mud, let your agony become your new flesh, and let your hate become your sole reason for your new being.)"
"(Yes. You are now to be reborn, no longer just a waste of human space and breath, but an effigy of mankind's darkness in their collective hearts. A being solely defined by hate and nothing else, an eternal slave to your own vengeance, a being of burden for all of humanity's shortcomings...)"
The glow from beyond the ledge becomes more sinister as the Abel-lookalike begins to inject his own mana into it.
"(... A human no longer, now just a puppet deity.)" The Abel-lookalike stated. "(A puppet deity of All the World's Evil, forever blamed for all of man's sins...)"
The screaming from the boy below became louder and louder, no longer sounding like that of any living being's.
"(... Awaken, first aspect of [Vengeance].)" The Abel-lookalike stated. "(... Awaken, [Ostracization]. Awaken, Angra Mainyu. Awaken, Avenger.)"
The air itself then explodes as the scent becomes that of raw sulfur, followed by an unholy screech that shook the foundation of the caverns that they were currently in.
"... Oh my god." Iri gasped. "I know that even by magi standards, this is just inhumane."
Next to her, Iri then hears Ahriman hyperventilating.
"... No... It can't be..." Ahriman jittered out. "THAT SICK BASTARD WAS THE REASON FOR MY EXISTENCE!? THAT'S WHAT HE WANTED TO SHOW ME!?"
From the dimly-lit and almost volcanic caverns, the whole scenery around them begins to shift like the ocean waves.
"Wha-What the-"
From a dim abyss to now an open and hilly plains of snow and ice, completely ravaged and stirred up by a massive blizzard.
"WHERE THE FUCK ARE WE NOW!?" Ahriman commented at the ice and snow, the almost-blinding amounts of white being a pure contrast to the inky blackness from the caverns previously visited.
"... I think... this is the Alps." Iri pointed out at the oddly-familiar scenery around her. "... Well, at least we're not freezing to death."
It's true. The only damning thing about the blizzard around them was that it blinded their view around the Alps, which its mountain ranges can be seen faintly from a distance ahead. Otherwise, the temperature around them remained ambient.
"This shit is getting weirder and weirder..." Ahriman remarked.
Then from a certain distance, they spot a small figure slumping through the snow.
"Another kid?" Ahriman sighed out. "And I thought Caster's master from 94' was a pedophilic nutjob..."
Iri just shrugs as she the kid in rags and shackles walk by them, completely ignoring the two.
She then tries to touch the kid, only for her hand to pass through his tuft of albino-colored hair on top of the boy's head.
"... So it's like a projection." Iri remarked. "We can look, but not interact."
"Well, I can still smell blood dripping off of his back through his rags..." Ahriman pointed out. "... How the fuck is he not dead yet?"
The two then walk closer towards the boy, trying to get a closer look at the boy's features.
For one, his physical appearance was no older than that of a preteen's, almost around Illya's age when Iri last saw her before she was immersed into the Holy Grail, his rags were typically worn by someone of a lower status, like a slave's, and his red pupils, all fixed in a dazed expression, but brimming with determination to cling onto his fleeting life, and in his shackled hands was the Holy Grail itself, but it's rims tipped with frozen stains of blood.
"... Who is he?" Iri asked. "... And why does he... remind me of someone?"
The blizzard around them grew even more intense, completely obscuring their vision around the Alps.
Iri and Ahriman try to squint through the intensifying illusional snowstorm, but try as they may, it was clear that the illusion will only let them see though when it feels like it.
All they can do now, is simply to wait it out.
... Or that was the plan, were it not for the fact that the two heard tires digging though the bluster of sleet and ice, followed up by the glare of headlights coming their way.
Iri instinctively jumps out of the way, allowing the unknown vehicle to pass through, only to smack herself in the head for forgetting that all of this were an illusion, so they won't get hit and ran over by them.
"... Well that was rather dullard of me." Iri grumbled as she picked herself up, patting her tracksuit pants instinctively.
"... We should move." Ahriman grumbled. "I think my eyes are going blind from the excessive amounts of white around here."
The two then follow the sounds of the engines echoing from a distance, making their way though the white screen and slowly regaining their vision.
"What the..." Iri gasped out as she saw a massive silhouette forming before her and Ahriman.
"... Yeah, I've seen and am weird shit, but this is just beyond stupid."
Standing before them was none other than the gothic scenery of the Einzbern Castle itself, the vehicles with altered black manji symbols around a red and white circle approaching the castle's gates.
"... Who are those people?" Iri asked.
"How the fuck should I know?" Ahriman replied as the two head into the castle with the parked vehicles by the open gates surrounded by men in steel helmets, thick overcoats with red armbands, and wood and steel rifles bolt-action slung around their shoulders.
But upon walking through the illusory doors, all Ahriman and Irisviel heard were the chattering and drumming of gunfire echoing throughout the castle walls.
"... I think negotiations sorta broke down?" Ahriman remarked at the hole-ridden corpse of a [Proto Homunculus].
A scream of pain was heard, followed up by a loud boom of a gunshot.
From the halls, a bloodied corpse of one of the Homunculus maid flew out, her body mopping the marble floors as two men in futuristic tactical armor with visored helmets that completely covered their faces, with one pulling out a Glock 17 to finish off the dying Homunculus with a bullet shot through her head.
"Come on." The other armored figure with a MP5 spoke out in a modulated tone through his helmet. "We got other shit to do."
The two then leave the body behind as more gunfire echoed throughout the halls of the castle, leaving the two to stare at the two dead bodies, their artificial ink-like blood pooling beneath their bodies.
"... I don't think we're in the same time as before." Ahriman remarked. "No wooden weapons of war here."
Iri then runs down the halls where the gunfire was coming from, and finds several more armored figures with MP5s and P90s holding down a chokepoint in the narrow hallways being peppered with gandrs and Storch Ritters.
"We're pinned down!" The figure with an MP5 stated urgently. "M-Jammers, now!"
The figures then all take out small metal spheres size of small apples with glowing blue lines circled around it. They then insert some of their mana into it before throwing them into the hallway full of the Einzbern Homunculi Guards, the armored figures ducking behind cover.
Instead of the spheres exploding like grenades, the so-called M-Jammers emit a bizarre frequency from the blue lines, causing all of the Einzbern Homunculi combatants to fall to their knees in unfathomable agony...
... Including Irisviel.
"ARGHH!" Iri screeched out as her body curled onto its side as the high-pitched frequencies mauled her brain to an oatmeal-like consistency, and her mana circuits being set on fire.
"OH MY GOD, I CAN TASTE MY THOUGHTS!" Ahriman screeched out as his blob form was bubbling and squirming like a sentient glop of tar that it is.
"ALRIGHT, WEAPONS FREE!" The armored figure with the P90 bellowed out as he and the others peppered the halls with their bullets, killing the writhing Homunculi dead.
Once the shooting stops, the figure with the P90 peers out the halls to inspect for any potential survivors, his illusory feet permeating through Iri's stomach.
"CLEAR!" The P90-wielding figure stated as he ejected his gun's magazine before inserting a new one into it, leading the other armored figures down the bloodied halls as they did the same with their MP5s before they pointed their weapons back to the halls.
"... Is the noise gone?" Iri asked.
"What?" Ahriman remarked. "Speak up, I can't hear shit!"
But before the two can talk, they see one of the Homunculi surviving the fire, and beneath notice, the Homunculi shot a gandr at the leader's face, knocking him down.
"OH SHIT! ONE OF EM'S ALIVE!"
The rest of the figures then bombard the surviving Homunculi with their bullets until the former was reduced to ground meat, while a few of them dragging the leader to the back.
"Zane, ya alright?" One of the armored figures spoke to the downed leader.
The figure with the P90 then takes off its helmet, revealing an albino haired person.
A Homunculus, like the Einzbern's own, but its sideburns shaved off, and visibly aged stubble and brows like Kiritsugu's.
"That ain't Abel." Ahriman remarked. "None of em are."
The two then suspect that the others with guns were also like Einzbern Homunculi, probably under Abel's command, with all the guns and anti-thaumaturgical measures that they have on their person.
"Just what happened while I was gone?" Iri asked.
"I think that's what we're gonna find out, like it or not." Ahriman stated as Irisviel got back up and navigated her way through the castle's halls.
Throughout the halls, more and more bodies of Einzbern Homunculi were being found, all bloodied and dead, all bearing the same wounds in different places, and all of whom which in their short lifespans, all died in gruesome manners.
"... On the plus side, it isn't bad as my rampage back at 94'." Ahriman scoffed. "... What? Lot less blood here."
Iri just lets out a disgusted grumble as she continued her way down the castle halls, with the sound of gunfire drumming and beating throughout the halls.
"If I remember correctly..." Irisviel grumbled to herself as she made her way down the halls. "... The main chapel where [Avalon] was originally held should be down here."
And just as she stated, she finds the giant double doors leading towards the chapel...
*BANG*
... With numerous armored Homunculi armed with M4s and one of them having a G11 slung around their shoulders, using one of the marble statues that they've reappropriated (statue itself is worth 5.9 million Euro) as a battering ram to bust down the magically reinforced doors.
"COME ON, YOU SON OF A BITCH!" The armored Homunculus roared out in unrestrained fury as he and the others rammed the doors. "COME OUT AND FACE US, YOU FUCKING COWARD!"
The group continued to ram the doors, the head of the statue now breaking off from the collision.
"SOMEONE GET THE T-JAMMERS AS SOON AS WE BUST DOWN THE DOORS!" The G11-wielding Homunculus barked out. "THE DOOR'S REINFORCED WITH SOUNDPROOFING!"
"... Just what do they want with the Einzberns?" Iri asked in fearful curiosity.
But just as she can mull her question any further, a man in a black trenchcoat with a black ski mask walks up towards the group of armored Homunculi.
"Yo." The masked man asked. "... Any luck?"
"Bastard's stubborn, bossman." The G11-wielding soldier stated. "At this rate, he'll escape!"
The masked man then lets out a sigh as he raised his hand, signaling the others to stop ramming.
"Stand back."
With a single reverse roundhouse kick, the man rips the double doors off of their hinges, sending the both of them flying into the chapel behind it.
"Swarm em."
The armored Homunculi then all rush into the chapel, firing their guns into the Einzbern's last line of defense.
"... That's Abel, isn't it?" Iri asked.
"I'd be surprised if he isn't."
And to their slight surprise, they still find the Einzbern patriarch, Jubstacheit von Einzbern, holding his ground with the silver strings crafted into wolves that were pouncing onto the armored Homunculi.
"GET EM OFF! GET EM OFF!" One of the armored Homunculus cried out as the silver-string woven wolf construct tried to wrestle away his M4.
The masked man then simply kicks the construct aside before he projected an M79 Grenade Launcher in his left hand, and fired a round at the construct, followed up by a loud and acidic hissing sound that melted the construct akin to a waterlogged spaghetti.
"Move along, keep your distance, and keep your eyes glued to that old fart over there." The masked man stated. "I'll lead."
The masked man then tosses aside his grenade launcher before pulling out an 8-inch barreled Smith & Wesson Model 500 Revolver from his coat, and and began firing at the patriarch's constructs, each shot stinging to their ears for how a handheld firearm can emit such sound, and even more surprisingly, and interally questioning how's the man's wrists aren't even faltering slightly at the handgun's recoil, structural reinforcement aside.
The patriarch then tried to reweave another construct with his magecraft, taking the visage akin to a dragon's.
"T-JAMMERS, NOW!"
The two armored Homunculi then bring in a dynamo-like object, activating it, and emitting a waveform that blasted throughout the chapel, disrupting the patriarch's mana circulation, and instead of a large construct being formed, the disrupted magi simply spawns another wolf construct to rush fruitlessly towards Abel.
*BANG*
Upon shooting down the last wolf construct, the man shoots his gun towards Jubstacheit, right into his chest, sending him flying right towards the cross behind him, knocking it down as his wounded body slid down from the wall.
"... Who are *COUGH* ... you?" Jubstacheit coughed out.
The man then takes off his ski mask, revealing Abel's face, right down to its signature psychotic grin streaked across his lips.
"... Not one moment that you recognize my ugly mug, and not a single Father's Day Gift Card to show for it." Abel sighed out at the now-horrified Einzbern patriarch. "Took me until 835 years since you ran out with my Holy Grail to find out where you live, only for me to also learn that the Grail was relocated to Japan of all places, and the only reason why I didn't come for your ass as soon as I found your hiding with the help of the Gestapo? ... Well, I had to maintain my cover back then."
He then places the barrel of his revolver right between the patriarch's trembling eyes.
"Now normally, I was going to plan on delivering your head to Illya as a prank... but considering the fact that you had to fuck that much for the past several centuries of having me running around like a coke-spiked squirrel..." Abel sighed out in disappointment. "... Yep. Some screw-up of a son of mine. I'ain't gonna even bother paying off the customs officers. That money is going straight to my dinner..."
*CLICK*
"... Just as this .50 cal bullet's gonna go through your head."
*BANG*
Jubstacheit's head simply exploded like a watermelon hitting the ground, his brains and skulls spattered all over the walls behind him.
Irisviel and Ahriman watched the whole scene unfold before them, the host falling onto her knees in aghast.
"... So... Abel's... my grandfather?" Iri gasped out.
"Yeah, I was surprised myself when I saw that my 'kid' ended up surviving long enough to start a whole new clan."
Behind herself, Abel was found on his stool, his punk & doctor hybrid appearance surprising them.
"Even more surprising?" Abel remarked. "For someone owns this whole friggin' planet, it took me that long to find him. But, what can I expect of my prototype Homunculus body?"
"Prototype?" Iri pointed out.
With the snap of his fingers, the whole world returns back to the vantablack, with Iri and Ahriman landing onto the couch provided.
"But hey, at least I spilled my guts... so now it's your turn." Abel stated as he tapped his pen onto the clipboard. "Irisviel von Einzbern and Angra Mainyu, currently know as Ahriman, first Avenger, yadda yadda..."
"WHAT THE FUCK WAS ALL THAT FOR!?" Ahriman screeched out at Abel's face. "WHY DID YOU EVEN SHOW US ALL THAT BULLCRAP IN THE FIRST PLACE!?"
"... Well, I needed to establish some grounds to start our session on." Abel remarked. "For my estranged-granddaughter, I couldn't even find her birth certificate, let alone, her driver's license..."
"What's a driver's license?" Iri asked.
Abel simply facepalms at there.
"... You drove once, right?" Abel remarked. "A Mercedes-Benz W194?"
"How did you-"
"Your hubby bought that car from the same firm I was working at by sheer coincidence, sweetie." Abel cut off Iri's statement. "I have to give him credit though, it took me three days to find where the paper trail led to, when it usually only takes me one."
"That's how you found me in the first place?" Iri pointed out.
"Well, there was also the fact that I found your daddy's condo back at WWII with me suckering the Nazis for a free ride across the Alps." Abel replied. "Sure, negotiations broke down immediately upon the krauts knowing too much, but hey, Nazis. ... That and well, I already memorized the whole damn layout after laying my bare hands on it and activating my structural analysis magecraft all over it, and well... the rest was simply playing the waiting game."
"FORGET ABOUT HER!" Ahriman barked out. "WHAT ABOUT ME!? WHY WAS I EVEN SUBJECTED TO THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE!? WHY DID I FORGET THAT I WAS JUST A HUMAN!? WHY DID I FORGET THAT YOU WERE THE ONE WHO MADE ME LIKE THIS!? ANSWER ME, GODDAMNIT!"
Abel simply smiled, even as the parasite held him up into the air by his shirt collar.
"Well, for one, I was experimenting, like any good magi would." Abel remarked. "After realizing that I simply couldn't put all my eggs into one basket, to put it that way, I simply had to work on new projects to further my goals. Tell me, why do you think Heroic Spirits and Divine Spirits summoned from the Throne of Heroes are referred to as 'servants' in the first place?"
"... Well, if I can recall correctly, they're referred to as such since they're familiars, usually summoned by a magi through a ritual." Iri pointed out.
"Well..." Abel sighed out before transitioning into a grumble. "... That wasn't their original purpose. They weren't supposed to be those kinds of 'servants'."
"Well, what other kinds of servants are out there?" Iri asked. "Just what is a servant without a master?"
Abel lets out another sigh before answering.
"... You magi are a bunch of arrogant lot, aren't ya?" Abel remarked as he shook his head. "By 'servants', I'm referring to the dictionary definition of 'public servants'. They were meant to act as this world's sentinels in case of extraterrestrial invaders beyond the Kaleidoscope, and around 1947, I tried to call upon servants to intercept the coming threat, but it turned out that you magi were hijacking my traffic towards the Throne of Heroes, allowing the said threat to crashland on Roswell, New Mexico, and now I literally had to bribe the Pentagon to keep their traps shut as we try to figure out how to kill the sonofabitch that landed on my property without raising the alarms, and henceforth, I funded the creation of Area 51."
The Grand Ruler then throws his pen and clipboard beneath him, scattering both.
"Congratulations, you schmucks." Abel sneered out with unrestrained contempt. "In your pursuit of seeking out the Root, you've potentially doomed all of creation as we know it! I hope that your little century-long playdates were worth it."
"Hey, it brought me here, that's for sure."
Abel says nothing...
*SHRUCK*
... As he drove his pen through Iri's right ear, digging into Ahriman's foundation within her brains.
Irisviel shrieks in pain as the pen dug into her skull, with Abel jamming it in her head to dig out Ahriman from his host.
"Oh quit your whining, we ain't going by A Nightmare on Elm Street rules here..." Abel remarked calmly though his granddaughter's screaming. "... Unless I feel like it."
Abel yanks the pen out of her head, with Ahriman's slimy form writhing on the tip of the ballpoint pen.
"WHAT THE HELL, DUDE!?" Ahirman shrieked out before he shrieked back at Abel's glare.
"Oh, like you're the one talking as if you're hot shit." Abel sneered at Ahriman. "You were just a flawed prototype that I simply needed to create in order to let me break through a bottleneck that I've ran into when implementing a pair of Greek twins as servants, and last I checked, you're more of an impotent version of a man behind the certain in Wizard of Oz. I'm the one running the show here, and if you don't like it, too bad, you're a permanent hire, as my fuckboy."
The black mud construct shrinks back in fear.
"Good boy."
Abel then brushes the goop onto Iri's tracksuit sleeve, leaving the two separate.
"... I apologize for my little outburst, I was never a... forgiving sort." Abel sheepishly remarked. "Every time I had to deal with your kind, the magi, the Church members, the Atlas eggheads, and whatever anal asshole I had to deal with every Tuesday... I start making assumptions, most of the time, usually ending with the other guy's gray matter splattered all over, or me apologizing."
Iri and Ahriman rolled their eyes.
"Anywho..." Abel remarked. "... The reason why I brought the two of you here is to assist you in your... dilemmas."
"And who's faults are those?" Ahriman pointed out.
"Regardless..." Abel sighed out. "... Look, in hindsight, I only did those things out of the heat of the moment, and also for the preservation of this world and countless other parallels. So to... compensate, I've taken up psychotherapy as my dayjob as a marriage counselor, with a minor in Crisis Management and Assistance. Regardless of what I showed you earlier, you can trust me with anything. I'm licensed for such cases, and stressful as the job is, I rather not lose it."
"Why? So you can hold onto their secrets for later use?" Iri asked with a glare.
"No, it's because I want to help people." Abel replied sincerely. "... Look, as a Grand Ruler, my alignment is not just Lawful Good. I'm... all nine alignments at the same time. Simply put, I genuinely want to help out many people as I can soon as possible before I inevitably screw them over. I dunno what I'm going to do next in my job to keep this world running, but let the records show, every action of good and evil intent, I mean it, 100%."
"... So your problem is that you're consistent with your inconsistency?" Iri pointed out.
"The sad truth of living for 128 million years of constant death and reincarnation... you start making excuses before you stop." Abel sighed out. "My whole run in this world is like one giant bender, except I literally cannot get drunk, ever."
Abel then brushes his hair upwards with his hand before resuming with his counseling.
"So anyway..." Abel remarked. "I have to ask, what do you two want out of your lives? Iri, you no longer have my idiotic screw-up of a son breathing down your neck, and Ahriman... you've fulfilled your purposed as the basis for all Avenger-class servants, so you can walk free without anyone shitting on you as far as I'm concerned."
The two lull for a moment before answering.
"... I want to go back to being normal." Ahriman answered. "I don't care what kind of life I live, I just want to be a normal human without any grand obligations weighing me down, because last I checked, the powers you gave me aren't worth shit."
"I want to drive a car." Irisviel stated. "It's the only fond memory I had before I became a Heaven's Dress. I want to relive my life as it was, for it was the only time that I felt genuinely happy."
"Alright, thank you for answering honestly." Abel stated. "Ahriman, I'll try to get your release papers and a spare body for you to live in soon as possible. And Iri... will you promise me that you take driving lessons as soon as all of this is over? Because the last thing you need after your liberation are lawsuits."
Both nod.
"Alright, we went overtime." Abel pointed out. "Dismissed."
With the snap of his fingers, the two find themselves in the same bathtub the were sleeping in for the past three days straight.
Standing above them was Jordan, the leomaned Designator, with a glass of water in his hands.
"Well, at least I don't have to splash ya." Jordan remarked. "Come on, food's gettin' cold."
(New York City, New York, United States, 8:03 AM)
"About 24 hours of nonstop driving and carjacking, I thought thing that was supposed to stop us was the city's infamous traffic..."
*SMASH*
"... But what in the actual is a 50ft-tall loli doing here, of all places?"
A pair of giant leather boots stumble across the streets, its owner in a buttoned-up thick green overcoat and a green beret over her short blond bob clumsily trying to navigate her way through this unfamiliar concrete jungle, as the streets below are full of crushed cars, blaring car alarms, and people running about like scattered rats.
"Sorry..." The giant loli's voice boomed out. "... Has anyone seen my ax?"
"... Haah... Deep breaths, Abel." He spoke to himself as he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. "... U-boat's only around 10 miles away from where I am right now, and I can simply... gah, walk there."
He then takes out Monica's immobile body along with her turtle familiar/portable Reality Marble carrying case, along with the two talking heads and the metal briefcase. Abel then takes off his jacket, and ties Monica's whole body around his back while his free hand carried the case.
"By your bootstraps, Abel..." He grunted out. "... Just as the great American myth poisoned the populace!"
He then kicks the car's door off of its hinges, and makes his way on top of the car's roof, hopping from one rooftop to another.
*Ring Ring*
"Goddamnit, now!?"
With his left hand, reaches inside of his pants and pulls out a flip phone from underneath.
"Gross." Shinji gagged.
"What is it?" Abel spoke to through the phone as he hopped from car to car in the pileup.
"Bossman, where the hell are you!?" A voice called out through the phone. "The whole city's in chaos because of servants!"
"I KNOW!" Abel remarked. "DID YOU CATCH ANY!?"
"ONE GOT AWAY! A BLACK KNIGHT THAT KEPT SAYING THE NAME 'ARTHUR' OVER AND OVER AGAIN!"
"... Uh oh."
Abel then resumes speaking.
"... Which direction did he run off to?" Abel asked fearfully.
"FURTHER DOWN SOUTH BY THE COASTLINE, TOWARDS THE US NAVAL BASE-OH CRAP, F-15-"
*CLICK*
*BOOP BOOP BOOP*
"... Oh fuck." Abel cursed out. "Things cannot get any more worse then this shit-"
From the windows, a headless person with a black trenchcoat wielding a hand sickle in one hand and a paper bag of bagels topped with a severed on the other burst out of the windowsill next to him.
Abel lets out a sigh as the headless man faced him.
"... Really man?" Abel shook his head disappointingly. "That was my favorite bagel shop, you damned redcoat-cocksucking-kraut."
The headless horseman, Hessian, flips Abel off before the latter smacks his body upside with the metal briefcase, absorbing his Saint Graph into it.
"Sorry Sal." Abel spoke to the decapitated head. "I'll bury you later."
From above, the 50ft-tall loli trips over her own foot and lands facefirst into the stock market building, knocking it over and crushing whatever unfortunate soul that was caught underneath.
"... Timber... oww..." The giant loli groaned out as she slowly got back up. "... Sorry."
Abel takes out his phone again and tries to call onto his other contacts planted around New York City.
"Come on, pick up, pick up..." Abel grumbled out as he continued to hop from car to car, nothing but wrecks crumpling beneath his feet.
*click*
"Got it." Abel remarked. "HELLO!? ANYONE ON THE LINE!?"
*click*
*BOOP BOOP*
"MOTHERFUCKER!" Abel screeched out as he threw his cell phone down onto the cracked roads below, smashing it into tiny bits of plastic and fiberglass. "... Guess we're on our own!"
"FUCKING A'!" Shinji cried out. "I ALWAYS WANTED TO DIE AS A HEAD IN A DIE HARD SET PIECE! WHICH, BY THE WAY, I'M BEING SARCASTIC!"
"JUST GONNA ASSUME THAT I CAN'T HEAR SHIT FROM YOU, BOY!"
Abel then walks around the gigantic lass, who's currently trying to pick herself up off of her rut.
But as Abel continued to run, he sees a tank shell flying towards his face, which he then slides on his knees under it, causing the shell to hit the giant lass instead.
"That one of your guys?" Kiritsugu asked.
Abel then suddenly finds himself facing against numerous barrels of M4s pointed towards his face.
"Nope. Just the National Guard." Abel winced. "... I think I forgot to pay them off last month."
"PUT YOUR FUCKING HANDS UP!" One of the soldiers barked out at the obviously off-putting image of a man backpacking a body of a cyborg girl with two talking heads hanging off of her waist.
But before anything can come of it, a stray missile blasts all the soldiers and Abel off of their feet from the ensuing blast, from an appropriated F-15 Eagle by a certain black knight dual wielding M249 LMGs.
"... Fuck everything." Abel grumbled out before he got back up from the crumbled asphalt. "The U-Boat, now."
He then runs past the scorched bodies of the National Guard and their smoldering wreckage of personnel vehicles, completely ignoring the manically-laughing Berserker Lancelot and the gigantic lass trying to swat the F-15 away like a fly.
"Brilliant. Just brilliant." Abel grumbled out. "Two Berserkers in the same damn city, one being an utter klutz, the other going about like Independence Day-"
Flying by him, several small flying saucers, each piloted by a hand-puppet-like creatures wearing old officer's attire, all of them doing a typical military salute as they flew towards the deadlock, with an even bigger UFO following behind.
Lancelot, in his currently-maddened state thanks to him overclocking both [Mad Enhancement B+] and [Knight of Honor], whatever remained little of his sanity, was now completely gone, replaced by a desire to simply kill, shoot, burn, maim, or do anything remotely violent to whatever's catching his eye the most.
And now, Lancelot has simply abandoned his F-15 mid-flight, causing it to careen towards the Mothership UFO, right below it's core, with Abel and the other directly under it's glow.
"... I was just kidding about the Independence Day part." Abel sighed out as the UFO mothership crashed into a named building.
The letters then crash down onto the ground, leaving only "RUMP OW" behind.
"Ha. Suck it!" Abel sneered as he continued to run towards the docks, completely ignoring the lithe-looking woman with a black beret over her short lavender-colored hair and a flowing black trench over her frilly tube-top and shorts who's aborted from the mothership and currently riding on one of the smaller UFOs piloted by her hand puppet-like familiars.
"What kind of a servant has a fucking UFO!?" Shinji screeched out. "AND WHERE ARE THEY GETTING ALL THAT MANA FROM!?"
"IT'S CAIN!" Abel barked out as he mounted over a crushed car. "WITH HIM COMPLETELY DESTROYING THE BOUNDARY BETWEEN THIS WORLD AND THE THRONE OF HEROES, IT'S WEAPONS FREE FOR THE SERVANTS RUNNING AMOK!"
"WAIT, DOES THAT MEAN THAT EVEN IF THE SERVANTS ARE DEMATERIALIZED-"
"THEY'LL SIMPLY COME BACK!" Abel replied as he jumped over a large gap formed onto the ground ahead. "IT'S LIKE THE WORLD'S MOST CHAOTIC PRISON RIOT!"
"So I'm assuming that briefcase on you is the only way to secure these rouge servants?" Kiritsugu remarked. "And I'm also assuming that you have more than one?"
"THIS ONE'S A PROTOTYPE!" Abel barked out as he ducked under a toppled over lamppost. "I SHOULD BE ABLE TO RADIO IN THE OTHERS AS SOON AS I GET TO THE FUCKING U-BOAT!"
"WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GET A U-BOAT!?" Shinji barked out.
"I STOLE IT FROM THE NAZIS 50 YEARS AGO!"
A smoldering car flies above their heads, and crashes right in front of them.
"UGH! MOVE!"
Abel punts the flaming car aside in rage before he continued his run.
"DOCKS ARE JUST UP AHEAD!" Abel barked out. "EVERYBODY HOLD ON-"
A loose debris hits on Monica's head, knocking it loose off of her neck right before it began rolling down behind them.
"OH CRAP, MONICA!"
Abel then runs backwards to retrieve Monica's head/cranial processing unit.
"Okay." Abel sighed out as he secured Monica's head in his arms. "RUNNING!"
He then redoubles his running speed towards the docks.
Along the way, they find a slumping albino man in torn-up tactical gear and carrying a FAMAS over the gun's shoulder straps.
"... Axton?" Abel spoke to the Homunculus. "The others?"
"Dead. All of em." Axton stuttered out. "That insane black knight sonofabitch stole our M249s and tore us apart like tissue paper!"
"The U-Boat?" Abel asked.
"He missed em in the favor of raiding a Carrier." Axton stated. "... I still got the keys."
"Alright, HUSTLE!"
The two Homunculi then run towards the warehouse with the waterway coming into the interior facing the waters.
Inside the warehouse's interior, a hidden bay was housing an old submarine barge in its waters, the black swastika around its red circle replaced with a golden-yellow manji symbol around its steel hulls.
The two get into the U-Boat's hatch sticking out of the waters, with Abel going in first, followed up by Axton-
*BANG*
*clack*
... Or he would, provided if he didn't get his head blow to bits by none other than Lancelot with a stolen Striker Shotgun in his hands, the smoking shell rolling on the ground besides his armored feet, and Axton's headless body being dumped into the waters below.
"OH FUCK!"
Abel then closes the hatch, only to find an RPG stored next to the ladder's base.
Lancelot, still in his crazed state of mind, continues to fire upon at the U-Boat with his Striker, but as soon after he fires his 12th shot, the gun comes out with an empty click.
The U-Boat's hatch opens once more, with Abel now pointing his RPG at Lancelot.
The rocket fires towards the crazed black knight, but at the last minute, Lancelot catches the rocket with his bare hands just before it reached him...
... Which prompted Abel to pull out his Smith & Wesson Model 500 Revolver with his other hand to finish the job, by shooting the rocket caught in Lancelot's hand, causing an explosion that sent the black knight flying out of the warehouse in a glorious conflagration.
Abel quickly closes the hatch before manning the U-Boat's controls and makes his way towards 20,000 leagues below the sea's waters, leaving Lancelot let out an enraged roar as his prey made their escape.
"Okay..." Abel sighed out as he put the U-Boat on autopilot (installed about 5 years ago). "... Now for the long haul towards Europe. Let's hope that the others aren't doing as badly as here."
He then places Monica's wrecked body at one of the cabins alongside with the two heads and the turtle familiar in the now-slightly-cracked fishbowl.
"Welp..." Abel sighed out as he placed his hand on the U-Boat's walls, activating his structural reinforcement throughout the whole sub. "... We can finally rest, but first, I need to put em out."
He then takes the key off of the turtle's shell and inspects it.
"I think I'll take em out..." Abel remarked as he looked at his spare cell phone's clock, currently reading 8:45 AM. "... Later."
(Abel's Mindscape, Unknown Time)
"... Can you hear me?"
Darkness. That's what he'd saw. That's what he's been seeing since his final sensation of betrayal.
"... Can you hear me, Mr. Emiya?"
His chest feels like ice. A hole was carved out of his chest.
"... Mr. Emiya, can you hear me?"
His nerves gelt like if they were gutted out. A fish swimming in a tank, waiting for its inevitable butchering and plating.
"MR. SHIROU EMIYA!"
He opens his eyes again, but still finds himself surrounded by darkness.
*tap*
... Only upon looking down he sees an albino man wearing a white doctor's coat over a white shirt with a silhouette of a bloodstained hornet, making up the crux of the strange man's quasi-punk attire ensemble.
If this is what God looked like, then Shirou shudders at the thought of what the Devil looked like.
"No, Mr. Emiya, the Devil looks nothing like me." The albino remarked with a wry smile. "Take it from me, I know."
"Just... who are you?" Shirou asked. "And where... where are we?"
"Oh, this little vantablack?" The albino doctor. "Well, you magi are familiar with the concept of dreams, correct?"
"... Yeah, it's when our subconsciousness are linked together, allowing one to see into other's dreams and thoughts when nearby, or so I've been taught." Shirou faintly recalled his former-teacher's lessons. "But why the void? Surely, even you must dream, even as you're awake."
"Tch tch tch." The albino doctor clicked his tongue. "I'm Grand Ruler, and I never sleep. The only times that I qualify as 'asleep' is either if I got my brains blown out during Vietnam War, or when I simply choose to ignore the internal world within the human subconsciousness, for if I actively chose to do the latter, your collective brains would've been reduced to the consistency overcooked rice porridge immediately."
Shirou blinks at the so-called Grand Ruler's claims.
"... What?" The Grand Ruler remarked. "Not the first time it happened. ... Or liquified gray matter spilling out of people's ears and I was the only one with the mop and bucket. ... Don't worry, your friends are fine."
"... I want to believe you, but last time I did that with someone else, I remember getting my heart sucked out of my body." Shirou pointed out with a skeptic tone.
"Understandable, so instead, take my words with a grain of salt." The Grand Ruler stated. "Anywho, forgive me for taking too long to answer your first question, so I'll just say it; my name is Abel, and I learned six months back that your teacher, I presume... Mr. Henry Hallmark, according to one of my old contacts, happened to be an associate with my brother, Cain, but by the time I found my brother, Mr. Hallmark was... nowhere to be found."
Shirou's lips tighten at the albino's words. The mere thought of after his sudden betrayal, Hallmark simply disappeared. Not killed or betrayed, or anything remotely grand and biting his own.
Just simply an anti-climatic vanishment. Like a stage magician's trick, when all is said and done, it was simply a trick in the light of their eyes.
But Henry Hallmark, the teacher that taught him everything about the world of magic and all of its intricacies, the meaning of heroism and its ultimate futility, almost like another Kiritsugu when he also disappeared without a trace, and later presumed dead.
Are all of the people he knows and love doomed to simply going to disappear without a trace one day? Who's next? Rin, Sakura, Fuji-nee, and/or the four Sabers?
... Did he disappear from everyone's trace himself? Was he the one who left the world without telling anyone?
"While you were comatose for the past week..." Abel stated as he looked as his clipboard. "... I took the liberties of looking at your body, and boy, what a friggin find. You've turned your entire nervous system into artificial mana circuits, giving you the power of roughly over 30-ish average magi in one body, and correct me if I'm wrong, but why do I find burn scars inside of your internal muscles?"
"... I've been told that." Shirou remarked. "I recall her kinda freaking out about how I kinda broke the powering scale of all magi."
"Broke?" Abel replied. "... I think you've doomed them."
"What?" Shirou asked.
"Okay, let me just break it down piece by piece." Abel stated. "Your teacher, Henry Hallmark, happens to be an associate with my brother Cain, who right now, the latter is trying to destroy all of reality so he can end himself. At first, I didn't understand how he was doing so, since the entirety of Kaleidoscope works out through several branches of causality... until I saw your body, then it started making sense."
"How so?" Shirou asked with a tinge of horror in his voice.
"Want me to give it to ya straight?" Abel asked.
"Please. I think sugarcoating will make worse." Shirou replied knowing that he can't run away nor he had plans to.
"Okay, just gonna say it: Hallmark used ya as a testbed to figure out a method to destroy all creation." Abel dropped the revelation onto Shirou's head. "The whole 'Nerve Circuits' shit? Yeah, it turns out that my bro is using the Kaleidoscope's branches of causality like how one would effectively repurpose your nerves into using his magic. Cain is literally repurposing the branches of causality to spread his own influence of [Destruction], and once he's amassed enough mana throughout the multiverse with the countless Greater Grails spread throughout the multiverse as loopholes..."
Abel points his index finger on his head before pretending as if he was shooting himself in the head.
"... Bye-bye reality." Abel stated. "Hello, primordial void before creation, and it'll stay that way, just as my brother wants, all because he hates everything for he thinks it was all his fault."
Shirou was left completely speechless-no, not just any mere loss for words.
... Despair. His whole existence had led up to this point. A tool used by the man who was never on his side to begin with. A walking corpse that should've been left in the flames ten years ago. A monster that tried to become a hero, all to fill in the same void that doomed to swallow up the whole world and countless others into nonexistence.
All he felt was despair.
Shirou has become despair.
"... So this is what it feels like to truly die."
Time Until [Kaleidoscope] is Destroyed:
2 Months
24 Days
6 Hours
21 Minutes
9 Seconds
To Be Continued...
Author's Notes: You know, when writing the tail end of this chapter, I had the trope "Cerberus Retcon" in mind.
The Nerve Circuits? Not just a broken alternative to the canon magic system of Fate/Nasuverse. Simply Henry Hallmark using the boyo to test out how it can theoretically collapse all of reality as they know it. How willing Henry was to this whole ordeal is still left ambiguous, even moreso in CrossyCross's original script.
Multiple Servants running about? Not just a fun gimmick anymore. Thanks to it, Cain has destroyed the boundary between the living world and Throne of Heroes, which in hindsight, should raise a few eyebrows upon Shirou summoning parallels of the same Servant, basically not only giving clearance for parallel Servants to manifest in the same plane, but also give Cain access to the whole Kaleidoscope and all of its Akashic probabilities coming with it, with the aforementioned Cain intending to end all of it.
Angra Mainyu's fucked up backstory of a normal villager turned scapegoat unwittingly? Abel is not only implied to have started the fire, but also added kerosene to the inferno, all just part of his plan to create a new class of Servants.
To put it simply, Shirou, and to a lesser extent, everyone else, all got played for utter fools since DAY ONE. The whole world has now turned into a one massive tug-a-war between two insane bastards, winner deciding to do what they want with the whole world.
With that said, this fic is a slow-burn one, so I'll upload another chapter when I feel like it, provided if I work on the other fics long enough.
I'm out!