EIGHTEEN

Friday, 16 October 2020; eighteen weeks

The week that followed was the worst one to date. Not only were things beyond tense at home, things were just as bad at work. There was a rumor going around that the company was in trouble and a small number of other people in different departments had already quit. Each day, she went to work, hearing more names of people that were now former coworkers as well as other whispers about a sinking ship. Each night, she came home to what felt like a cold war. They still took turns getting dinner, but they ate in a strained silence. And aside from a few pleasantries exchanged when they first crossed paths, he rarely said anything else.

He barely even looked at her anymore.

Not that she blamed him. It was hard for her to look at him too. Every time she caught a glimpse of him, she found herself missing the way his lips felt against hers or the way his hands would start a fire as they trailed over her body. Occasionally when he spoke to her, she would close her eyes and remember the things he would whisper in her ear in the dark of night.

The few times that their gazes did meet or when she felt him staring at her when she wasn't looking, she knew he was experiencing it too.

Friday night, after trying to put on the jersey she had stolen long ago, she burst into tears because it no longer fit. When she got a grip of her emotions, she called Ginny and demanded she come shopping with her the next day. She agreed, just like Hermione knew she would, but she suggested that she come over with James in the morning since he would be working on the garage again with Harry.

With a heavy sigh, she wandered down the hall where she knew he was, having heard his door shut not too long ago. She didn't let herself pause before she knocked on his door. He opened it after what felt like a lengthy stretch of time. The mask of indifference on his face melted away at the sight of her red, puffy eyes, his gaze dropping down to her stomach for a moment.

She shook her head and offered a smile. "Nothing's wrong," she assured him.

"Hermione-"

She shook her head, a quiet laugh bubbling past her lips. "I promise. Just hormones. Since I never got what I needed last weekend, nothing fits now." She cleared her throat as his features softened; a semblance of a smile on his lips. "Ginny agreed to go with me, but asked if you could just bring me along when you go over there in the morning."

His nod was stiff. "I was planning on leaving at eight."

"I'll be ready then," she said, taking a step back. "Thanks."

"Night," he said, the door closing a second later, the sound bringing a fresh round of tears to her eyes.

Saturday, 17 October 2020; eighteen weeks

The car ride the next morning had been the most awkward fifteen minutes of Hermione's entire existence. The only thing that gave her peace of mind was that she wasn't alone in her suffering. The moment he parked the car, they were both out of it in record time. They exchanged nods as she went inside to greet Ginny while he stayed in the garage with Harry.

Hermione wasn't sure why she thought shopping with Ginny wouldn't last more than a few hours. They had ended up making a full day of it, going from one shop to the next and over indulging themselves with treats. Ginny said they needed to do more of it. That it was sympathy eating and she could get on board if Hermione needed a binging partner. And when it was time for dinner, she called Harry to see if he and James had eaten yet. When she learned they hadn't, and that Sirius was there too, they stopped to pick up dinner for all five of them on the way back.

It was a little jarring to see Sirius. He apparently hadn't been brought up to speed on her condition. To her relief, he didn't make a big deal about it. Instead, he just asked if she was alright and that if she needed anything, she knew where to find him.

After dinner, they all found themselves in the living room. She was sandwiched between Ginny and Harry, listening to the two of them and Sirius carry on the conversation by themselves. James chimed in here and there, but mostly stayed silent while he sat in one of the armchairs, sipping at his fifth beer of the night. Hermione had a feeling she would be driving them home.

While she was sitting there, their words filtering in one ear and out the other, completely unheard, the baby began to move more than it ever had before. So much so, that she winced and put her hand over the spot, her face pinched at the sensation it caused. It didn't quite hurt, but it wasn't exactly comfortable either. James was the first to notice, his brow furrowing as he leaned forward in his chair.

"Hermione?"

But it was Harry beside her that said her name. She shook her head and managed a smile. "Sorry, baby's moving. It's usually not this rambunctious, but-" she stopped again when it happened again, this time leaving her with a cramp-like feeling low in her gut.

"It?" he asked, a smirk on his face.

"I haven't learned the gender yet, so yeah," she said with a smile. "It."

"When do you find out?" Ginny asked, her eyes glued to Hermione's hand on her stomach.

She reached over, taking Ginny's hand and placing it over the spot where the baby was kicking. "Monday."

"What time?"

"Uh, eleven I think. Why?"

"Oh!" Ginny exclaimed, her face lighting up as the baby moved again. "That's so fucking weird."

"You can't swear around the baby, Gin," Harry warned.

"Yes I can. It can't hear anything."

"It can," Hermione corrected. "But it's heard worse from me."

"See?" Ginny teased, a triumphant smirk on her face to which Harry simply rolled his eyes. "I can go with you if you want some moral support."

Her gaze lifted, clashing with James' almost immediately. They had already discussed that he wanted to be there for that appointment, but she had no reason to turn Ginny down. He gave a casual shrug of his shoulders and looked away. Hermione's heart skipped a beat as she turned her attention back to Ginny, but not before catching the look Sirius was giving James from the corner of her eye. "Sure," she said, her voice cracking for a second. "I'll text you the address for the doctor's office tomorrow."

"What are you hoping to have?" Sirius asked, studying her in a way that made her uncomfortable. As if he knew something he shouldn't. When everyone went silent, he looked around. "What? Isn't that typical of-"

"She's not keeping it," James said, his voice gruff as he tipped the bottle to his lips, finishing off the last of it.

Sirius gave her an apologetic grin and a nod of his head. "Sorry, I just-"

"It's fine," she said, trying her best to ignore James. "I just can't do it on my own. The couple I picked are much better suited for parenthood than I'll ever be. They have their shit together and everything."

"That's good," he said. "I'm sure you've made them very happy."

She continued to smile, but didn't comment. She did, however, do a double take at the way Harry was staring down at her stomach after Ginny removed her hand. When he felt her eyes on him, he lifted his head, his green eyes searching hers for permission. "You can touch," she whispered.

He was quick to lift his hand, but hesitant to put it down. Hermione felt the pace of her breaths decrease as she waited for him to touch her. When he finally did, the baby was quick to move again; almost as if it had been waiting for him. As if it recognized the familial bond. She gnawed on her lower lip, her eyes beginning to water. He jumped a bit, but he was smiling down at his hand.

"This is fucking weird."

"Told you," Ginny muttered with a nod of her head.

Without meaning to, she looked up again, her gaze landing on James. She swallowed hard as she saw the way he tried to mask the sadness as he stared at them from across the room. His gaze had barely lifted to hers before he pushed himself out of his chair and took his leave, the sound of the bathroom door down the hall closing reached her ears a few moments later.

If anyone else noticed that he seemed a bit off, Hermione wasn't sure.

It wasn't much longer after James returned that Sirius took his leave, bidding them all goodbye. It was an even shorter span of time once he left that she shared a look with James, coming to a mutual agreement it was time to go as well. Once they were outside, Hermione put herself between him and the driver's side door, holding out her hand for the keys.

"I'm not-"

"You are," she said, wiggling her fingers.

He sighed, clearly wanting to argue, but he caved, placing the keys into her palm and walking around to the other side of the car. It took a moment to adjust the seat, but the moment she was comfortable, she began the relatively short drive home. She had barely parked in the driveway before he was out of the car and walking up to the front door. She caught up after a moment, using his keys to unlock the door before handing them back over. He held the door open for her and followed her up the stairs before they broke off to their own rooms without saying a word.

It was a little while later, after she had changed into her sleepwear and finished her bedtime routine that she wandered downstairs for a glass of water before turning in for the night. She had just come out of her room when she saw him appear on the landing of the stairs. He paused when he saw her too, the both of them exchanging weary smiles at one another.

"Sorry about Ginny," she said after a moment. "I can cancel on her if-"

"It's fine," he replied, his voice tense. He rolled his shoulders as if forcing himself to relax. "It was going to be tough to leave on Monday anyway."

She nodded, not sure of what else to say.

Not that there was anything to say.

So they just stood there, staring around the hallway, neither one of them ready to move away just yet. It was when her hand rose to her stomach, the baby moving yet again, that he was there, his hand falling into place above hers. His other one curled around her hip, pulling her close while his face settled into the crook of her neck.

"Stay with me," he murmured, his breath warming her skin.

"James-"

"Just for tonight." He pulled her even closer to him. "Please."

She had barely begun to nod before she realized they were moving down the hall towards his room. She was taken by complete surprise when his intentions became apparent. Instead of wanting her the way she was anticipating, it turned out he was seeking comfort of a different kind.

With their clothes still on, the blankets pulled over them, he curled up against her back. His lips pressed against her shoulder as his arm banded around her waist, hand splayed across the swell of her belly. Without a word, she placed her hand over his and settled back into him, taking all the comfort she could get. Before she knew it, she was fast asleep, wondering what the next day would be like since this one had been completely unexpected.

A/N: They talk soon! I promise :)