Greetings. I am Chara. It's been a long time since I last saw you, person who is listening, reading, or watching me. Well, a while since I last felt your presence. Have you seen... Everything that I've done?

Have you watched me try to kill myself each time? Have you seen me make my countless marks of self-harm?

I hope you haven't. I hope that no more people have to know about that stuff. I don't like that I did that to myself. But I had to do it.

Tell me, listener, have you ever killed everyone that you know and murdered everyone that you care about? I doubt it. But I have. Hundreds on hundreds of times. The feeling you have when you know that you've ended millions of lives of everyone...

Men, women, children...

It hurts.

It hurts so bad that you don't want to live anymore. It hurt me so bad that I need to die, yet my friends won't let me. I want to die so bad so that way there isn't a chance that I would kill.

So, reader, if you can watch, read, or listen to anyone else, please let them know that I need to die.

It'll make the world a better place. I'm a curse. After all, that's what I was named.

Chara Curse.

And then my next name didn't make anything feel better for me.

Chara Fight.

But my current name really makes me happy. It lets me know that if I dream hard enough, I might be able to live if I can change.

Chara Dreemurr.

Y'know, watcher, you're a great person to vent to. I kinda sense some compassionate or sympathetic feelings from you. Thanks. I really mean it.

I'm sorry that I'm going to end my story. My life is just evil. To both me and those around me. Please, when I kill myself, forget about me or only remember the good things about me. Okay?

It seems to me that you might even care about me? No, that can't be right. No one should care about me. Heh.

…

So...

Uh...

Why can't I wake up right now? Hmm. I guess I really need this sleep, huh? Well, just let me know if you want to talk, okay?

…

…

…

Sorry, I forgot we can't communicate. So, uh, I guess I'll talk. I'll talk about... Hmm.

I will talk about, um, Frisk and I's relationship.

I really care about Frisk. She's a great person. Sure, she killed everyone once. But that wasn't really her choice, I don't think. She's a very curious and attentive person. She can tell which of my self-harm cuts are new and which ones are old. I think that Frisk's curiosity made her do it. Curiosity made the cat kill all its friends. No, that's not how it goes. But still, Frisk is the greatest person I ever met. She's caring, strong, pretty, and just awesome in general. I hope she's fine when I kill myself.

I don't want to kill myself for a couple reasons. I would hurt everyone I care about. I would hurt Asriel really bad. I would hurt Frisk to the point where she might commit suicide also. I don't want that. I care about her too much to let her do that. But...

I think that she cares too much about me to let me kill myself. But I need to, you see. When I kill myself, there's no chance that my EXP can get to me. There's no way I'll be able to hurt others. If I'm dead, I also will stop self-harming and I won't try to kill myself anymore. It'll help me to kill myself more than it will hurt others. I think.

I am in a love hate relationship with Frisk at the moment. I love her, yes, but I'm very upset with her for not letting me die. I just NEED TO KILL MYSELF! WHY DO YOU KEEP ME ALIVE, FRISK?! WHY WON'T YOU Let me end my life. . .

O- oh...

I want t- to end my l- life...

Yeah...

W- well, I think that I'm w- waking up. . . ?

See y- you...

Hi again, person that's observing me! It's me, Frisk! So, how are you? Oh wait, I forgot that you can't talk to me. Whoops. Well, could I talk to you?

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I'll take that as a yes. I'm going to talk about Chara if that's okay?

…

Sorry, I keep forgetting you can't talk. Or are you making this the most one-sided conversation ever? I'll assume that it's the first one.

So... Chara. I love her a lot. She's amazing. Chara is a hurt person. I want to make her feel better. No, I will make Chara feel better. She really, really wants to kill herself. She's tried so many times. Though, I do have a hope. It's a very strange hope. I hope that Chara tried to kill herself after each self-harming session she did. Because that means that she's stopping herself. Instead of me having to tackle her and take the knife away. Heheh. I question why she wants to kill herself. I was the one who forced her to do that. I killed everyone and then she killed to protect everyone. She took away my LOVE and EXP. So, I kinda forced her to. If Chara should be trying to kill anyone, it shouldn't be herself. Chara should try to kill me.

I forced Chara into hating herself. I put her in this horrible mental state that she's in right now. Chara doesn't deserve to feel bad. I do. If Chara ever does succeed in her suicicide, I don't know what I'll do. I really, really care about her. I love Chara. I want to be with her forever. I don't know if it's the right option for me, but I think I might kill myself if Chara does. That way we'll be together. But, I don't think it's the right option for Asriel, Papyrus, Toriel, Asgore, Sans, Undyne, or anyone else. They'd all be devastated by having the both of us kill ourselves. I need to stop thinking about those kinds of things.

I'm going to brainstorm ways to force Chara to not commit suicide. Whenever we take away a weapon, she quickly finds another one. Just look at what happened after we brought her to Undyne's house after her treatment. Or earlier today. Chara is determined to die. I've already tried saying that whatever she does to herself she has to do to me, but she is just ignoring that. We've tried having someone watch her always, but she finds a way to get away. Maybe if I handcuff us together? No, that would just be invasion of privacy, for both of us. I don't think that there is anything that I can do to help Chara stop hating herself. Chara wants to die too much to stop her. I will find a way, though.

I will.

I will just show her that she can have love and LOVE at the same time. She can feel feelings while still having LOVE. I'll let her know... somehow. But I will, I'm sure of that. I'll comfort Chara when she's sad. I'll help Chara calm down when she's angry. I'll show her how to not be afraid when she's scared. I'll be there for Chara always.

I'll show her how to be happy, even though she's done a couple bad things. I'm not suicidal anymore even though I forced Chara to kill, I killed everyone, and I murdered Papyrus. I've accepted that I'm not the greatest person, but I'm not evil or bad. And, by god, I'm definitely not a pacifist. I'm trying to follow more pacifist-ish ways, but I'm not one. Chara is most definitely not evil or bad. She's a beautiful, great, loving person who was forced to do some bad things. I'll help Chara.

No matter what, no matter how. She's the love of my life, after all. I think I'm waking up, person who's watching, listening, or reading me. I'll be seeing you? Goodbye!