Another Second Chance

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Another What If based on the episode, A Deadly Game, what happened if Rick didn't return to the precinct after leaving and this was really their last case. What would each other's lives have looked like? The story starts with Canon dialog, courtesy of Dust Jackets Dot Com, then goes quickly and completely AU. The journey continues with a new Kate and Rick, hope you enjoy!

I don't own Castle; I use the characters for amusement purposes only, except the ones I create.

Also, we may take liberties with the timeline from Canon and use events to make this a more believable fiction, thanks.

Chapter 15

Castle's Residence

Pismo Beach, California

/_/

Rick went through his checklist for her visit, drinks in the fridge, sandwiches, her favorite, some in the cooler, some in the warming rack depending on her mood, her favorite dessert, and chips. OK, if he was going overboard, he was and he didn't care, ten more minutes and she would finally be there.

FLASHBACK Continued

Alexis and Gina stayed with Rick until lunch, then they took the afternoon for a Mom, Daughter shopping spree. He had slept comfortably and Marcy had popped her head into the door to check almost every 20 minutes or so.

Rick sent them away, he didn't want them sitting in the chairs even as comfortable as they were, they weren't home and he really needed to read Roy's letter. He would deal with Kate a little later he thought.

"Hey you guys get out of here, go shopping or something I'm fine, you can see that now, and Gina, I didn't even fight you on Doctor Peers, which you know I usually would. I know I need some help, and I don't want you both just sitting watching me. The nurses are here, and you can see how attentive Marcy is, I'll be fine."

"OK Dad, but you call Mom or me, even if you get a hint that you're not feeling well, please?" Alexis asked,

"Rick, please don't try to deal with too much yet, I think Doctor Peers will really help give us a game plan to keep you from having those attacks, OK?" Gina seldom begged, but there was an urgency in her voice

"OK Gina, you're right, I won't dig into that until I at least talk to him via phone. You try to set it up, it looks like I have another week, before they will consider letting me go back to California. I really think being home will help me, but we'll see." He said

"I will Alexis, I promise to call, but you saw the scans, I was lucky, everything is still intact, so all they're going to do now is give me the antibiotics and pain pills, so I'll be asleep when they do, pretty boring for you guys." as first Alexis kissed his cheek, then Gina kissed his lips, "You know I love you; I would take it all back, every second of your pain if I could" she had a tear in her voice

"Hey, over and forgotten, besides you now have your soul mate with Peter, everything for a reason, like I always told you, the universe takes care of us" at the mention of the universe, he was greeted with matching eye rolls from his ladies,

"See you tomorrow Dad, and I'll call you later, don't give these poor nurses a hard time,

Marcy was walking in with his pain shot just as Alexis finished speaking, "Oh we have our ways to make bad boys behave, drop them, Rick, you know the routine" she smiled, as Rick rolled to his good shoulder and Marcy administered his pain shot, "Don't worry Alexis, I'll take care of him, he's become our special patient up here so all my nurses are keeping their eyes on him."

"Thanks, Marcy, you don't know how much better that makes Mom and I feel, and we can't thank you enough for what you did last night, it means a lot to us both" she hugged the nurse before she turned and left,

"She's quite the lady Rick, how old is she now? Marcy asked,

"She's 18 going on 30, she's getting married at the end of her semester at Stanford, I wish they would wait but she's made her mind up, and he's a great young man, a few years older. He's finishing a four-year program in less than three so neither are lazy or dumb, they'll be OK." He said

"You trying to convince me or yourself, of course, she'll be OK, she was raised right. You're going for a little nap, I'll keep my eye on you, so relax and just rest. After you wake up we'll deal with getting you some decent food, and you can start on that letter you're clutching, deal?" Marcy asked, as she took Roy's letter and put it securely in his drawer.

"Deal, I still owe you so how can I refuse you?" he smiled,

"Good night Rick, I'll be around" She kissed his forehead and was out the door.

XxX

Two floors down, Kate Beckett had suffered a terrible night, pain, no sleep, and a constant nagging ache in her heart that it was over with Rick, something that had to do with Josh that had really hurt him deeply. She kept playing the latter part of their conversation over and over again in her mind.

She replayed the last few minutes of their conversation over and over, even slowing it down in her mind to one sentence at a time. Then one struck her like a bolt of lightning,

you did something that I have a very hard time forgiving, and probably will always remember how it made me feel. You lied, to my face, at least three times, you didn't need to do that. If you had said, sorry Castle I'm with Tom it would have hurt, but nothing like being made to look like a fool in front of all your friends.

She thought back, yes, she did lie, and she could understand how that would make Rick feel. Even Javi had told her, he wasn't hanging around to see her with another guy, but he was Castle, he was supposed to be there for here, Always, he said it, more than once. She slapped herself mentally, knowing that was bullshit, no one would put up with what she did, he was right.

The problem was they were headed in such a positive direction, talking about what each wanted, then when he said "Oh Wow," she remembered how she had to press him to explain what he meant, Oh God it was Josh, that was what started him down the doubting path again. She was right, bringing him to Martha's wake killed any chance she had to reach him. She recalled her words, again dissecting them word for word.

"I was getting gas, he pulled in next to me and we started talking, he gave me his card, I wouldn't give him my number, well long story it was six weeks of phone calls until we finally went out, then he left for a Doctors Without Borders, DWB gig, and another two months went by, he had just got back when I saw you at Martha's wake.

"Oh God", she thought, "I was the one that called Josh", after meeting at a gas station and within six weeks were dating. If he had done that it would have absolutely killed her, so why didn't she think Rick would hurt as well.

The attendance at the wake was just the crowning moment, he believed first that she never would have told him about Tom and the Hamptons if it hadn't slipped out by accident. Then she pursued a random guy on a Harley, accepted his card, and worse yet, she pursued it and dated him within six weeks. Thinking back to the short verbal exchange they did have,

"I would have talked to you Kate, I was the one who moved, I didn't expect you to be without someone long, it's not your style, Sorensen, Demming, and the doctor, so why would I be surprised?

The words that hurt the most were that he expected her to just move on so easily, "to be without someone long, it's not your style, really hurt. How could she dispute it?

Then on another full mental replay the conversation that caused his abrupt change was so clear, it played out so loud it was almost as if he were standing there speaking the words to her in person, his tears almost choking out his voice, God what an idiot she was.

"Kate, WHY, why everyone but me? You met him at a gas station, and you were dating in six weeks. You ran a complete background check on me, including financials before you would allow me to sit next to you. If you fell in love with me on our third case, WHY, HOW did you manage to keep meeting different men and throwing them in my face.

She had to talk to him again, she just had to, she was going crazy lying in bed, thinking, replaying the last year without him, and even worse, the events that didn't just suggest he leave, but drove him away as fast as he could go.

She was sitting up in bed, knees pulled to her chest, weeping softly, destroying another tissue when she heard a familiar voice,

"From the looks of you, I take it the letter didn't work? I'm sorry Kate, I really am" Lanie said as she crossed the room and just held her friend as she cried for at least 15 minutes, finally getting composed enough to talk."

"Hi Lanie, actually the letter worked fine, he called me last night, we talked for over two hours but then when we were discussing what happened, he asked about Josh. I told him the truth, where I met him, and how I had called him back since I wouldn't give him my number." Kate got out,

"Did that upset Rick, I mean after Demming, I thought that would have been your biggest hurdle to get over with him, so how did this play out?" Lanie asked,

"Well, he hit me pretty good about Demming which he was entitled to, the worst part is he doubted if I would have ever told him about it if Tom hadn't been such a blabbermouth and spilled the plans" Kate replied,

"Well?" Lanie asked,

"Well, what Lanie?"

"Would you have told him about you and Tom, I know when he saw you two necking on the stairs, it almost destroyed him. That's when Ann, Roz, and I took him out for a drink. He was so down," Lanie offered

"WHAT? You three took Rick out for a drink? Where was I?" Kate almost screamed,

Lanie remained calm, "well from the looks of that make-out session I would bet you were home fucking him, just as Rick, Ann, and Roz thought, so we decided to get him away from there as quickly as possible. I answered your question so would you have told Rick if he hadn't found out?"

Kate was pissed, at herself, at Roz, at Ann, and especially now at Lanie, hell she had already shown him her boobs, what did they do at the bar with a few drinks in her, she knew her friend could get wild.

"Sit there all righteous if you want, but nothing happened, not that Ann didn't try her darn best. She had a few too many and was practically in his lap. Rick remained the perfect gentleman, and gently would place her back on her seat each time, until he got coffee in her and she sobered up and apologized.

"So where is my answer Detective? It's a simple yes or no question?" Lanie pressed on

"Kate looked at the floor, then the window then said, "Yes, of course, I would have told him, then as Lanie caught her eyes, OK, probably not, but it was my business Lanie, Castle and I weren't going together or even dating." She pleaded,

"Oh, like you mean now when you're trying to get him to acknowledge you, and forgive all the hurt after not seeing him for a year, Kate? Yeah, I can see there's a huge difference, one is your business, the other is what you want.

"Do you really think Rick can't spot the phony reasoning you gave; sure, you met the doctor at a bike rally. Did you not realize that YOU had to be the one to follow up with his invitation to call him? How many times have you asked Rick out, or even just called to thank him for something nice he's done for us all?

"How the hell do you think Ann and Roz feel the urge to go after him, he called them during rough periods in each of their lives, he cared when few others were there for them. From that look it's just as I thought, you never knew what the hell was going on with two of your female detectives but Rick did.

"You didn't know that Roz had a tumor removed from her breast they thought was cancer? Rick got her in to see the best doctors at MD Anderson and was actually with her on her day of surgery since she didn't have anyone close by. It was benign, but to Roz, well she would do anything for that man now.

"Ann's mother died, I bet you didn't even know that, did you? Na, Na don't interrupt me, I know you saw it on the bulletin board but did you talk to her? Did you know that Ann was going to cash in her pension to pay for the funeral until Rick found out, and then suddenly everything was paid for? Do you want to know why they love Rick? I think you got your answer, and that's just one instance, there are more, many more."

Kate sat with her knees against her, really feeling low, Lanie was right, when things were for her, it was her business, and honestly, she probably would have kept both Josh and Tom a secret if she could. She had to explain to him, especially now that she realized that only knowing Josh for six weeks then starting to date was truly a slap in his face, made even worse by visiting the wake with him. Why the hell didn't he just wait like he was told, Damn it?

"Kate, I'm going to get something to eat, let you think about what I said, and you tell me how I can help if you want it when I come back. I didn't say those things to hurt you, but girl, you need to see how life really is, not just through the Beckett lenses, I'll be back" and she was out the door.

XxX

Rick woke to the sound of low beautiful humming coming from Marcy, she was adjusting his IV lines, one medication must have run out, as he saw an empty bag as Marcy calibrated the drip rate of the new bag she had hung. He reached for the letter he was going to read before he crashed, and it was gone, he felt around feverishly, only to come up empty,

"Rick, easy Darling, what are you looking for? Remember I put it in your stand, let me get it for you, and give me some deep breaths, your BP is going up again, relax, please, more breaths" her arm was around him holding his close, he could almost kiss her, but wait, she was his nurse, she rocked him and continued to hum, till finally, he felt his body relax.

"Marcy what was the name of that song, it was beautiful, I never heard it before. You should sing, you have a beautiful voice" he said, she blushed as she handed him the letter attached to the sealed file.

"Thanks, Rick, you're too nice, I just hum to remind me that even sad music is still music and a way to express ourselves. This was an oldie, Ray Price sang it a long time ago, For the Good Times, it reminds me of my past, well the last days of my marriage. I choose to remember the good times, it's the only way I've been able to keep it together for the girls." She said and for the first time, Rick saw a tear in her eye,

"I'm sorry Marcy, that was personal, too much for me to have intruded, forgive me, but please do sing, I enjoy listening to your voice, It's so relaxing. He smiled, and her smile came back in an instant

"Wil do, I'm sure you want to read that, and I do have more patients than you," She scoffed and smiled, then added, "but none I like better" she laughed and walked out of the door.

Rick looked down at the file, sealed as only Roy would do, not even an air hole showing, and a simple white envelope with 'Rick' scrawled on the face taped to the middle of it. Rick closed his eyes, remembered his friend, and a conversation they once had, when Roy asked him if he would forgive him of anything, was their friendship that strong.

Rick was glad he answered yes, something told him this was more than a hello letter as he gently opened the seal and pulled out the few sheets of paper and placed them on his lap. He was expecting an apology or at least an explanation, even Evelyn knew of his secret and now the boys and Kate, a mistake he had made and now paid for with his life.

Rick was determined to save his friend's reputation at all costs, he was too good of a man to go down in the same class as his two former partners, Raglan and McCallister. Evelyn and his family deserved better.

He glanced at the letter, and it was indeed his letter of apology,

"Dear Rick,

"If you're reading this, a few things have happened. One I have been reassigned by the Chief above, he only knows to where, I'm praying I did enough for it to be in heaven, but I know it will be a long shot if I can get in.

"I'm sure that you've heard of my screwup, well colossal fuckup if we're honest. I can explain it till you join me here, but it's not important what happened, just that it did. I swear Rick, I used it to become a better cop, I made mistakes tons of them, but I hope this will make up for my cowardly actions when I was alive.

"When you open the file, be sure you have a secure location, no one, especially Beckett, or anyone from the 12th must know of its existence, it could cost them their lives if someone gets wind of its existence. I know you have contacts with the FBI and CIA, don't ask Rick, I know much more about you than I ever let on. I'll leave the course of action in your hands, so let me begin the story and where you come in.

"You know of the three cops, but you don't know that an aggressive Assistant District Attorney, William Bracken found out about our ransom scheme and instead of disciplining us, took most of the money to finance his political career. He's one of the most powerful senators in America today, so I urge you, PLEASE use extreme caution, and again NO ONE from the 12th can know of this or you have signed their death warrant.

"The contents of the file speak for themselves, enough evidence to put Bracken away for the rest of his life, he is the one that ordered the hit on Beckett's mother, but believe me had I tried to do something, my family, as well as Kate's, would all be dead, perhaps even you and your family. It was a risk I couldn't take.

"I know how careful you are, so if you are going to duplicate the records, only you yourself can do it, Rick, trust NO ONE, PLEASE. I think you will know the course of action you need to take once you've reviewed the file. I would appreciate it if you could keep Evelyn and the girls as far away from this as possible, God knows I failed them enough.,

"Well, if I didn't say it before, I will now. I really enjoyed having you at the precinct, and I was very sorry that you were forced to leave, I understand but I was still saddened. Take care of yourself, Rick you were always a better friend to others than we ever were to you, I am truly sorry to leave you in such a position, but I can't trust anyone else,

Good Luck,

Your Friend,

Roy

Rick kept the letter in his hand, as he walked over to the closet at the corner of his room. Alexis and Gina had replaced the suit he had worn to the funeral, it was now evidence in an attempted murder of a police officer case, but there were some comfortable clothes to leave the hospital in.

He looked harder and yes, he was correct, there was a safe inside the closet, much like those in suites in Vegas. It made sense since many VIP clients needed to protect their valuables while they had procedures performed. He did a quick test, and he was in luck, it worked.

Returning to his bed, he locked his door, and closed the blinds from the window, when he opened the file, Roy was correct it was enough to convict not only Bracken, but many high ups in the police force, judges, and even another Congressman. Rick sealed it back carefully, and locked it in the safe along with Roy's letter,

He would have to think about how to handle this, it certainly was evidence worth killing for. He unlocked his door and returned to bed just in time before Marcy came in,

"Sun hurting your eyes, Darlin?" in her quiet voice,

"Yeah, yeah, something like that. Marcy knew something was up, but she thought better of asking, just figuring it was still the Detective two floors down that had him upset.

TBC