hello hello hello! I've left writing this chapter entirely too late,but i'm also very inspired to write. Bit of a odd mix, but i'll deal with it.
qotd: what's your favourite lgbt warriors ship? (in honour of pride month.)
my answer: my response is very mixed- but i love jakextall, ravenxbarley and alderxpuddle. i think leafxmoth would be really sweet as well! bit of a odd one, but i think feathertail and brook would be super cute together.
review Replies:
Crystalshine of Lightclan: I responded to your reviews individually but would just like to say a massive THANK YOU SO MUCH again. Also, those reading should go check out Crystalshine's fic, Crystallised Ivy!
Duskspiral: Yeah, the towns pretty shaken. And it turns out it might have been homophobically motivated which is… just sad. I still haven't watched the cats movie, i'm a firm believer that the release of Cats(2019) bought about the hellscape that is 2020. And * obviously * - it wouldn't be a warriors fic without that! Hopefully you'll see that i've tried to go about a different route :)
SomeStormLeaf : #justmoonscarthings. Foxstar SUCKS but i drew her the other day for some reason. (it's up on my art insta) And thank you :(
anyways, onwards with the chapter. should just be a short one today because i've been working on a new fic. (it's called Unfulfilled Prophecy, and i still need a few ocs for it!)
as always, feel free to review and pm me!
Moonscar felt as though she was quite possibly the worst deputy ever. In the history of Thunderclan. She just couldn't seem to get anything right, and it was driving her crazy.
She was doing alright with the duties she'd describe as 'nothing out of the ordinary'. Organising patrols and the like. But everything else? It was going horribly.
She couldn't even seem to get the smallest thing right. For example, Larksong's kits had been made warriors not long after her deputy ceremony, and for some reason she couldn't get their names right. She knew that they'd be made Spiderspring, Heatherskip and Bubblewhisper, but for some reason when it came to talking to them, she just referred to them by their names when they were apprentices. The first time she'd done it, she'd apologised profusely. But she hadn't been able to stop, and she was fairly certain that the littermates all disliked her now.
Foxstar had watched her most recent interaction with them with a sick glint in her eye, and Moonscar had had to resist the urge to spit at her leader. They didn't really talk much for a deputy and a leader. Foxstar had invited Moonscar in her den early in her deputyship, and had informed her just how many lives she had left. It was two. There were just two spindly little lives between her and the leadership of Thunderclan. Thin as a spider's cobweb. And she was fairly certain it was even less than that, now. There had been an incident a moon ago, where Foxstar had left the camp with a spring in her step, and had returned, bone-weary. She had been bleeding, Moonscar recalled. And she had a shallow cut in her neck, one that looked seasons-old. But it hadn't been there that morning. Moonscar was sure of it.
Foxstar had been watching her with that look throughout Moonscar's time as deputy. She stared her down as Moonscar fumbled over her words, announcing the patrol for the gathering. (She'd called Spiderspring Spiderpaw again, for Starclan's sake.) She'd watched on, impassive, as Moonscar had limped back into camp from a border altercation with Windclan. (Thankfully, Sheepfur hadn't been present.) She'd announced Moonscar's name at the gathering with a certain leer in her voice that had made Moonscar's fur bristle. She'd then glared down from the gathering tree at her, because Moonscar had puffed up double her size and had made a young Riverclan apprentice faint.
It was a deeply depressing existence, having your leader scrutinize your every move. Moonscar felt so crushed sometimes, by the pressure. It just wasn't fair. She didn't want to be deputy. She'd never asked for it, yet she'd gotten herself tangled up, and she was stuck with it. She would have nobody by her side, if Emberlight didn't keep forcing herself in. Her sister was heavily pregnant with Sparrowthorn's kits, and she still found the time and the energy to pad around, fixing Moonscar's mistakes. It was never a complete fix, it was mainly just putting a cobweb on a broken leg, but it helped Moonscar, knowing there was someone there for her. Even if she did have this Starclan given task, surely she could relish her sister's company? Just as long as she held her at paw's length. Never letting her get too close, never letting herself care that much. After all, caring just lead to heartbreak.
Caring just lead to the screeching call of a hawk in the trees, and pain, pain, pain. It just lead to lives being dragged out, slowly, in a quarter moon, nobody by their side. It just lead to the sickening crack of bone on wood, and the echoing voice, calling out something Moonscar didn't understand.
No, she couldn't let herself care for Emberlight. Not like she used to. She'd be friendly, and help her sister pick out her kit's names, but she wouldn't let herself get too close. Not again.
(She liked Sandkit and Petalkit for she-kits, and Elmkit and Nettlekit for toms.)
She felt like she was slowly getting better at being a deputy. Gradually. She'd led a patrol to deal with a Skyclan patrol, and this time she hadn't accidentally given away prey. That particular incident made her blush to think about it. She'd been intimated, standing in front of a patrol of Thunderclan cats, into giving away prey she knew was Thunderclan's. And by apprentices, no less! She only knew that because the Skyclan deputy, Ivybird, had had to talk the apprentices into giving the prey back. All while Moonscar had stood there, tongue-tied.
She didn't know what had happened to her. She'd gone from a perfectly capable warrior, to this trembling excuse of a deputy within a few moons. She didn't know why she hadn't been asked to step down yet. Possibly, Foxstar thought her struggling was funny. For a cat who insisted that she always put the clan first, Foxstar was awfully selfish.
She was walking back from one of her many patrols. Recently, she'd been testing out a theory. If she was in camp less, she'd probably get yelled at less. So far, it had worked. However, it had also left the clan without a deputy to turn to when things got tougher. She just announced who'd be patrolling, and when, and then left the camp. She was never there to keep the Clan together. It was selfish, probably more so than Foxstar, but Moonscar couldn't bring herself to care.
Moonscar padded back to the camp from another exhausting patrol, and slumped on the floor in front of the fresh-kill pile. Through half-closed eyes, she saw Emberlight approach her.
"Are you alright?" Her sister asked, amber eyes shaded with concern. Moonscar shook her head, and left it at that.
Many moons ago, she would have answered that question properly, without hesitation. She would have laid her soul bare for Emberlight to analyse, and hand back to her. A few moons ago, she would have shrugged. Slightly less moons ago, she would have hissed at her sister to leave her alone. She didn't know which Moonscar she preferred.
(Her younger, carefree self was the one she wished she still was, deep down.)
"Rough day?" Emberlight mewed, and sat down next to her. "Here." Emberlight said, and Moonscar looked up. Emberlight was sliding her a mouse. "I caught it." Her sister purred.
Moonscar nodded, and took the mouse. She bit into it, and finished it embarrassingly quickly. Emberlight didn't watch her eat, she just stood and stared off into the distance.
"The kits will be here soon." Emberlight mewed softly. "Daffodilheart reckons there'll be three. Maybe four."
Moonscar looked up. "That's great." She meowed. She was shocked at how genuine her voice sounded. "I'm happy for you." She said, dipping her head. Once again, she was surprised at how much she agreed with her own words.
Emberlight leaned into Moonscar, and for once, Moonscar allowed her to. Maybe she should let other cats in. Just once or twice. See where it would get her.
She allowed herself to take in the companionable silence, and sighed.
my doc name is "moonscar is * pensive * and that's fairly accurate.
hope this is okay!