Disclaimer: If I owned Teen Titans, Cyborg and Bumblebee would've had a fluffy scene at the end of the episode "Wavelength"

I'll Be

Chapter 15 Comfort

Starfire

I was tossing and turning in my bed all night. It had been a few days since Beast Boy had returned home from the hospital. Ever since then, I have been unable to sleep. Images from what I saw kept flashing in my mind. Suddenly, I could not take it anymore. The guilt, the pain. I had to go apologize to him. I got out of bed and hurried down the hall. BANG! The sound made me jump out of my skin and echoed down the hall. That could not be… I felt very scared. I hurried toward his room when I saw Raven leave it, her face full of tears. I rushed up to her.

"Friend Raven, what happened?" I asked urgently.

She looked up at me, hatred filling her face. She grabbed my hands and pulled me into the room. My heart dropped to my feet at the sight before me.

Beast Boy was lying on the ground, blood all around him. He was dead. I gasped in horror. No, please don't let it be true. I fell to my knees when I saw the gun lying in his hand. Friend , why? I tried to look away but Raven made sure that I kept looking.

"You see what you made him do!" Raven shouted."It's all your fault he's dead! It's all your fault!"

"No!" I screamed. I clutched my head as her words kept ringing on the walls. I could not stop staring at the dead body in front of me, the blood. Please let it be a dream.

I wake up in a cold sweat. My heart is pounding so loud I bet the entire tower can hear it. The words of Raven keep echoing in my head. The dream felt so real. I cannot take it anymore. I must make sure Beast Boy is safe and sound. I must apologize to him, just in case my dream means something. I get out of my bed and leave my room. As I keep walking down the hall, I think about my dream, making tears fall from my green eyes. I do not care what time it is. I have to apologize to him. I am about to knock on his door when it opens. My eyes widen in shock as I see the suitcase in his hand, but I am too upset to care.

He drops his suitcase. "Starfire?"

I take good look at my friend, just to make sure he is real. I notice his body is shaking slightly, and his surprisingly pale face is stained with tears. My dream flashes back into my mind. I throw my arms around him. "Oh Beast Boy!" I sob.

I feel his body tense up just by my touch, making me cry harder. It hurts so much that he does not feel comfortable around me. I know I deserve the treatment though. I know I do not deserve his forgiveness. I am just so happy that he is still alive and that my dream did not come true, that I do not care. I feel surprised when he guides me into his room and tells me to sit on the bottom bunk of his bed. I sit, my hands covering my face. After a few minutes, my sobs cease. I look at Beast Boy, who is looking at me. I can not tell what he is thinking at the moment.

"What's wrong, Star?" His voice is so soft I can barely hear him.

"I had a dream."

"About what?"

"That you were dead and I never got to apologize." I cry, the tears starting to fall again. I watch as he looks away. Taking a deep breath, I decide to tell him now. "Friend, I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. Please believe me. You are one of my best friends. I was just obeying orders from Robin."

"What did Robin tell you?" His voice cracks.

"He said you were dangerous. He did not want me to get hurt. He was trying to protect me. But now I realize that the only thing he has been doing is causing you great amounts of pain. He told us to stay away from you. I knew that you were not acting yourself when you started staying shut up in your room. I hate myself for not coming to see if you were okay. It is all my fault you are in so much pain. I know I do not deserve to ask this, but is there a possibility you could forgive me? I just want things to go back to the way they were."

I watch as he keeps his eyes fixed on his hands. He still refuses to look at me. "You don't know how much you hurt me, Star." he says quietly.

I remember the past Raven sent me to. I remember Beast Boy cutting himself, the pain he felt, and what I had done. I feel even more guilty. Silently, I pull up one of his sleeves. I gasp as I see the gash on his arm, still trying to heal. It really did happen. He really did cut himself after I refused to laugh at his joke. I remember the memory. "Believe me I do. Raven sent me to your past. She sent me where I refused to laugh at your joke. I felt everything you felt. I watched you do this to yourself." I say quietly. "I do know."

He looks at me in the face. My heart beats faster and faster. Beast Boy does not look like the strong, funny, tough Titan I have always known. His walls are down and I see his weak side. He looks so lost. All of his emotions are showing through. I look into his eyes and see extreme pain and guilt. After what seems like an eternity, he pulls me into his arms for a friendly hug. I hear a couple of sobs escape him. He is trying to hold them back. I hug him tightly back, so happy that he has forgiven me. "Thank you for talking with me, Star. It means a lot to me," he says, his voice finally back to the normal volume. "I'm going to miss you."

I remember the suitcase. "Where are you going?" I ask.

"I don't know. Robin is right about one thing. I am dangerous. I have to get out of the tower, go somewhere so I can learn to control the Beast within me. I can't stay any longer. You guys are better without me."

I feel panic rising in me. I know that is not the only reason why he is leaving. He still thinks Robin and Cyborg do not care about him. He wants to get away from the pain. I feel tears running down my cheeks again. "No! You cannot leave us! You are not dangerous! If the Beast is coming back, Cyborg can give you another antidote. Please, do not leave us. Think about friend, Raven. It would break her heart if you leave her."

"I'm doing this for her. I also had a nightmare. I dreamed that the Beast took over me again and I unintentionally killed her. I don't want a chance like that to happen. So I'm going to find somewhere that I can't hurt people."

"But-." I start, but Beast Boy cuts me off.

"There's no point trying to talk me out of this. I've made up my mind. You need to get some sleep, and so do I. I have to get up early tomorrow."

I try to say something further, but Beast Boy gently pushes me out of his room. "Tell Raven I will come back for her."

Before I can say another word, Beast Boy shuts his door, leaving me in the hall. I look at the clock on the wall and realize it is 1am. I know Cyborg will probably hate me for this, but I know I must talk to him before Beast Boy leaves us forever.

I hurry to his door and knock frantically, trying not to wake anyone else up. After a few minutes, he opens the door. "Starfire?" he says, yawning. "Do you know what time it is?"

"Please forgive me friend, but I really need your help. It is really important."

"Help with what?"

I take a deep breath. "Friend Beast Boy is leaving the tower for good. He thinks he is dangerous. He thinks we do not care. I need your help to convince him that we do care, and to stay."

Cyborg's face drains of color, now fully awake. He pulls me into his room. As the door closes behind us, I hope with all my heart that we can find a way to convince Beast Boy to stay. We are not Titans without our changeling.