A/N: Well, here it is! The fasted update I've had since I started this story! I've had this scene written from the beginning, with some minor changes happening as the story has progressed. Thank you for all the love and support! I hope you enjoy chapter 17!
Chapter 17
Haley's head was spinning. Was this real? She thought they were something. She thought they were going to get married in a few months. He had literally proposed a few hours ago. Her life was perfect a few hours ago. Everything she thought her life was going to be flashed before her eyes a few hours ago. And her biggest nightmare just flashed before her eyes now.
"I'm sorry," Haley shook her head, placing her glass on the end table, "Did you just say your job was in LA?"
"I did."
Haley got up from the couch and walked over to the counter, still trying to process what had just happened. She shouldn't jump to any conclusions, but she couldn't help herself. He just blurted out that he got a job offer across the country.
She spoke slowly, "So what then? Are you going to take it?"
Now it was Nathan's turn to climb off the couch and walk over to meet Haley in the kitchen, "I want to."
Haley tried to avoid face reaction, but apparently, she failed when Nathan spoke again, "This is something I've been working towards for two years, Hales. And I finally got it."
"I understand that, Nathan. But what about us?" She asked, making a motion between the open space between them.
"What do you mean, what about us?" Nathan questioned, taking a step closer to her, "We are solid, Hales. I know you're the one for me, and I thought we were going to plan a wedding before the school year."
"Yeah, but plans are changing…you're apparently moving to LA," Haley blurted out without even thinking. She didn't know what she was thinking…pain, hurt, betrayal, so many emotions were flying around, and she was having trouble grabbing on to one.
"I never said that I was leaving," Nathan fought back. Now it was his turn to get defensive. She was jumping to conclusions before they even had a chance to talk.
"But you want to."
"Yeah, of course, I want to! But apparently, that's not the point," The man challenged.
"No, that is exactly the point," Haley glared at him, "You want to leave and take this job."
"But it doesn't mean I want to leave you. I love you."
Haley closed her eyes before speaking up again, "I know that you love me. But you made this decision before you even told me. A relationship is about making a big decision like this together."
Without even thinking, Nathan spoke, "Just like your decision with music."
His words shot a bullet in her heart. Her mouth went dry as she tried to yell, but her words came out as a painful whisper, "Excuse me."
Not even taking it back, Nathan continued, "You made the decision that you weren't going to sing without me."
"That is not fair!" Haley yelled, tears now forming in her eyes.
"It's the same this you're accusing me of, except I'm talking to you about this decision. I'm not shutting you out!"
"I made that decision for YOU!" Haley yelled, pointing her finger at him, "I knew how hard it was going to be teaching, recording, and spending time with you, so I said no. I chose you over music! Am I so bad because of that?!"
"So, you're saying because you gave up music for me, I have to give up this dream for you?"
"That's not what I'm saying at all! Don't put words in my mouth!"
"But it is! Behind the lines, you want me to give up this dream because you gave up yours!"
"I made that choice, and I would do it again today if I had to!"
Battling back, Nathan yelled, "And I made the choice to spend the rest of my life with you."
Lowering her tone, Haley spoke, "Well, you've got a hell of a way of showing it."
Nathan's face fell as he said, "Don't do that."
"Do what?" Haley asked, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Act like I'm the selfish bastard that is making this decision without a second thought."
"It kinda feels like you are."
Now his voice was raised again, "Are you kidding me? You're the one who gave up her dream without even talking to me about it!"
Haley uncrossed her arms and slammed her hands down on the counter. Her ring making a loud clang as it hit the marble, "Dammit, Nathan! I was willing to give it up for you because of how much I love you! When I compared you and music, it wasn't even a competition on who I wanted to give my time to!"
"That's so not the point of this, Haley! You have no idea how much it hurts me that you gave up so easily on something I know you can shine in! You didn't even let me have a say! One of the biggest, most rewarding things in your life, and you cut me out of it. That still hurts."
"You know what hurts me, Nathan. The fact that we are arguing over this. If I weren't in the picture, you would already be on a plane to LA. I'm proud of you, Nathan, I really am. I know how hard you've worked for this, but I hate that I'm the one pulling you from your dream."
Nathan spoke at a whisper at his newfound realization, "And I'm the one keeping you from yours."
Haley stood there, silent, afraid to move. This was a day they were supposed to tell their children about one day. But now, whenever they think about it, they are going to remember the argument that shortly followed it. She and Nathan had very different personalities, so they disagreed often, but no matter what, they always made up or started laughing soon after they fought. This was unlike anything they had ever done before. It was a good thought, right? If they were going to spend the rest of their lives with each other, they should get used to the worst.
She hated fighting with him, but she figured all the anger was gone now. They did not even talk about the actual problem: the job offer. She was so proud of him, but that did not mean it did not hurt. She wanted to go with him, but she had a life here in Tree Hill. Her job, her family, her Brooke was all in Tree Hill. The thought of leaving never crossed her mind, but maybe for Nathan, it should.
Nathan took a breath and ran his fingers through his hair. In the year he had known Haley, they had never fought like this before. Sure, they had their arguments, but nothing this severe, ever. How could such a perfect day be shot to hell so quickly? When he got the offer yesterday, it took everything in him not to tell Haley. He thought they might be able to celebrate two things in one day, but clearly, his thought process was flawed. He was not expecting a blow out like this. He loved her, more than anything, but this was not them.
They just spent the last hour screaming at each other. They purposely said things to hurt each other. They were still young, and they had different dreams. It killed him when Haley decided not to pursue music, but it never hit him until now that he was the reason she didn't do it. She made such a sacrifice for him, and he should be able to do the same, right? But this was his chance to make a name for himself outside of basketball.
Maybe if he just went for a while and got a good reputation, he could be referred closer to Haley. But in order for him to do that, more sacrifices would have to be made, and he couldn't make Haley do it again. He just couldn't, not after everything she had already done for him.
The room was silent. Both afraid to be the first to speak up.
Nathan broke the silence with a knife, stating, "Maybe it's better if we just take some time apart."
"You want to break up?" Haley asked, trying not to let her heart explode all over his kitchen. Of all the things he could have said, those words were something she never thought she would hear from him. He was supposed to be the one that would never break her heart.
Nathan took a step toward her and spoke softly, "Look at us. This is not us, Hales. This is not the couple we are."
"We can work something out; I know we can. Please, Nathan, don-" Haley tried. She felt her heart being pushed off a cliff, and she wasn't strong enough to hold it.
"Haley, we just spent the last hour screaming at each other-"
The tears were now flowing from despair instead of anger. Haley spoke through the hurt, "That's what we do, Nathan. We fight all the time, but…"
"But we never hurt each other like we just did," When she didn't say anything, he continued, "I love you, Haley, more than anyone will ever know, and I always will. I just…I can't hurt you like this again. You would be living your dream right now if it weren't for me. I can't be the person that causes you to cry like this. I can't. You deserve to smile and laugh every day with someone that makes you feel like a queen."
Haley walked around the counter, separating them, crying, "You make me feel that way, Nathan. You are who I want. You are the person I want to marry and have kids with. You are the person I want to go to sleep with and kiss in the morning. You are the person I want to fight with. It's you, Nathan."
Nathan could not even look at her because he knew her face would break him. With his gaze still on the floor, he said, "And you are the person that I don't deserve."
"Nathan…" Haley chocked, biting her bottom lip.
"This is what's best for you, Hales."
Her head whipped up at his statement. She used her index finger and pointed it on his chest, exclaiming, "You don't get to decide what's best for me. I am a twenty-five-year-old woman, and I can make my own damn decisions. And I chose you."
Nathan grabbed her hand, gently removing it from his chest and said, "Hales, please don't make this harder than it already is."
"So…so you're willing to just give up after one argument."
His gaze finally connected with hers when he said, "Haley, an argument is who forgot to take the trash out last night. We just ripped each other apart, trying to make the other feel guilty."
"But I didn't mean it."
"Yes, you did. We both did. And I can't do that to you again. This was the first of many if we were to try and make this work. I can't do that to you."
Haley flung her arms up, exclaiming, "But what about what I want? Or do I ever get a say in anything?"
When he didn't say anything, Haley could see it from his eyes. Nothing was going to change his mind.
She had to catch herself from breaking down right in front of him. She felt as though the pain in her heart had quadrupled. She looked down at the ring on her finger and bit her lip. This couldn't be happening. Haley looked at Nathan once more before taking off the ring and putting it on the counter. She grabbed her purse from the table and walked out the door without even saying goodbye. If he wanted this, he would get it. This was supposed to be the best night of their lives…what the hell happened?