WARNING: This Chapter contains graphic descriptions, continue WITH CAUTION!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except my story twists and Kelle.
-….*...-
-….*...- Chapter 20: -….*...-
-….*...- What I'm Capable of -….*...-
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""
"You'll watch everyone BURN," A deep menacing voice rasped.
"No," Kelle whimpered as she stumbled forward into a long corridor of the Maze, not remembering how she got there.
She panted, the cold and stale air making her shiver. Twisting around in a panic, she tried to figure out what part of the large labyrinth she was in.
"And there'll be nothing you can do to save them!" The voice rang in her head.
Trying to block out the voice, she slapped her palms over her ears, and screamed out, "Go away!"
"You'll try but it simply won't be enough." The voice continued without falter.
"Stop!" She cried, pressing against her head even harder while she squinted her eyes shut.
As soon as she thought the voice had gone away, her hands were suddenly ripped from her head, her wrist entrapped in heavy metal cuffs and chained to either side of the corridor.
Her muscles strained while she wiggled against the heavy chains.
"You're worthless." The voice growled.
On cue, the slab in front of her slowly slid open. On the other side, was revealed to her, all the Gladers huddled within a corridor.
"No," She twisted even harder until the bones in her hands and wrists were cracking, "Run!"
But her voice didn't seem to reach them, and so, she watched in horror as multiple Grievers appeared and slaughtered each and every person.
Her body quaked, what strength she had fading away with each mangled scream coming from the people she swore to protect. She gasped at the blood-red scene painted before her, her eyes blurring with newfound wetness, and her heart feeling bruised and broken.
"Useless."
Her chains began to move, dragging her down the corridor, pulling her away from the hall of corpses.
She yelled for anyone to help her, her legs flailing around like grass in a whirlwind.
When the chains stopped again, her body was violently jerked, and she whimpered in pain.
"All of your friends...," The voice hissed, a vial ring attacking her ears.
Her eyes widened, her skin paled, and her spine creaked in rigid terror.
Most of the Keepers, the few people she had grown close to over the few weeks she had come back to the Glade, including Minho, Zart, Winston, Jeff, and Frypan, stood in a new hall before her.
She pulled on her bonds again, screams of desperate pleads echoing from her throat. But, no warning could reach their ears, and so she watched them all be butchered by Grievers.
Her muscles quaked, and her chest heaved weakly from emotions not being able to help them brought upon her. Her chest constricted, profound sorrow ripping it open with every cry that came from the boys dying in front of her eyes.
When the chains moved again, she didn't resist them as hard as the first time. The fight in her soul slowly drained from her being as her gaze steadily watched the bloodily-morbid scene left from the Griever's attack. It was a scene she felt was going to haunt her for a good part of her near future.
"You'll abandon your family," the voice taunted when the movement of her chains stopped.
Although she dreaded what she would find, she lifted her head to see who had been placed in the hall.
Her skin paled, and a new rush of strength, thanks to adrenaline, allowed her to launch her body forward in an attempt to protect the boy.
Alby's figure shook as he looked straight into her eyes, seeing her a few feet in front of him.
"You're unforgivable for everything you've done," The dark-skinned boy growled at her, his eyes brim-full with tears, "I should've left you in the Maze!"
She choked on her breath, feeling her heart shatter like a pottery dish. His heartless gaze paired with his dreadful words ripped through her sanity, bringing despair, loneliness, and fear into her soul.
Whimpering sobs fell from her lips, a shriek from a nearby Griever ringing through the cold night.
"No," She cried, "Alby, run. Please, Alby."
He continued to stare at her with unfathomable hate and malice.
"Alby, please, I'm begging you." She yanked on the chains, "Run!"
But just like before, her begging didn't faze him.
The Griever rounded the corner and tore his body away from her with its razor blades for teeth, Alby's blood spraying onto her figure.
She cried, thrashed, begged, twisted, and yanked against her chains, to the point where she dislocated both shoulders with a nasty crunch and pop while the Griever ripped the boy's body to shreds.
She collapsed, her arms tingling with needles and knives, the image of Alby's last pained glance destroying her mentally. The air she breathed could hardly give her lungs life because her whole being felt dead.
The chains, one last time, to her horror, lifted her limp body from the chilling red-painted floor and drug her to a new location.
"And the person you love will die at your own hand!" The voice boomed, shaking her core with its very force.
Her surroundings began to spin, her vision losing focus as her whole world clouded and blurred together in a concoction of wicked darkness. A splintering pain was being drilled into her head, like a tiny screwdriver, at the inability to control her vision. She screamed, trying in any way to rip herself away from the unbearable agony she was being overcome by.
An ear-ringing bang echoed into the Maze.
Her feet became grounded on the floor again, stopping her head from spinning. She trembled her eyes screwed shut, afraid of what she'll find if she were to open them.
"K- Kelle...?" A weak trembling voice called out to her.
She slowly opened her eyes.
Her chains had disappeared and the pain from her dislocated shoulders had faded, but her body went cold, despair, horror, and dread seizing her being in a state of disbelieving paralysis.
The foreign metal of what she remembered being a handgun was firmly fixed into her palm while the uncomfortable feeling of a trigger rested against her finger. Smoke steadily rose from the barrel of the gun, and standing a few feet in front of her was Newt with a gaping bullet hole in his chest.
"Kelle?" he repeated, his voice echoing, soft and broken.
"No!" She shrieked, dropping the gun and running forward to catch the boy as he toppled backward. They both slumped to the ground, her gently cradling his damaged body against hers, while his hands weakly grabbed fistfuls of her shirt in an attempt to hold onto her- to hold onto something.
She woefully fought against the liquid blurring her vision while she smashed her hand over the bullet hole in his chest. She could sense the blood inside his heart pumping against her palm, his body straining to stay alive.
"You betrayed me," He sputtered, the sparkle of life flickering away in those soft brown orbs she had loved since the first day she perceived them.
"No, Newt, stay with me," She cried, tears pouring from her eyes in unceasing rivers.
"I... trusted... you," He gasped, his body going limp
"No," She whimpered, her bottom lip quivering.
His eyes froze, the sheen covering them dulling to a lifeless gray.
"Newt?" She called to him, reaching up with a red slicked hand to brush his bangs away from his face, smearing scarlet onto his ashen skin.
His chest stopped heaving for breath.
"No- Please- Newt." She sobbed, her fingertips brushing along his velvety cheeks as she moved her hand to his shoulder, trying to shake him awake.
His body became cold, the blood still oozing from his wound turning to ice against her warm skin.
She stared into those dark lifeless orbs, feeling her spirit slip away.
Her shattered heart fell into a million pieces, and down within a dark abyss.
Loneliness. Sorrow. Grief. Pain. Anger. Self-hatred.
That was all she could feel. They mounted together and ripped her sanity apart piece by piece.
"You'll rot away, alone! The way you always should have been!" The voice came back, shrieking inside her mind.
Her body alone couldn't physically handle all of the emotions rippling through her being, and so, as its only way of release, her unfathomable turmoil tore from her throat in a guttural ear-piercing scream that echoed into the eternity of her dreams.
""
Blinding light pierced her vision as her body instinctively ripped itself from the ground, a scream tumbling from her lips and echoing into the trees. She choked the air not fitting into her raw throat properly as her eyes whirled around in an attempt to see all of her surroundings.
She was sitting on the soft grass in her Hideaway within the Glade, the sun resting close to sunset in the sky.
Newt.
The one name sent a wave of panic coursing through her veins, goosebumps following, as she forced herself to move. Her body trembled with so much force she looked as if she was having a seizure, and her legs, not understanding what they were supposed to do, fumbled with each other as she clambered through the tall grass. Her arms flailed outwards, trying in confusion to help her move.
Finally getting onto her feet, Kelle forced her unprepared legs to carry her through the forest of the Deadheads in a disheveled type of a sprint. She couldn't breathe- couldn't think- she couldn't feel anything, but that didn't matter.
All that mattered was him.
All she needed was to know was if he was safe.
Within a few minutes, she was dashing through the soft grass towards the Homestead, and as fast as possible up the rickety wooden flight of stairs. She nearly ripped the wooden makeshift door off its hinges as she entered his room.
Standing in the warm rays of the setting sun was the boy, his tan skin gleaming in the light. His sprakling earthy eyes studied her in concern while he finished shrugging on his white tank top.
"Newt," She whimpered, tears trickling down her cheeks in heavy streams. Seeing him standing there, alive, caused immense relief to wash over her, and she crumpled to the floorboards.
"Bloody hell, Kelle, what's wrong?" He rushed over to her side, kneeling next to her, and placing a warm palm on her exposed shoulder.
"No!" She flinched away from him, tumbling farther into his room. She was afraid of herself. Terrified that she would lose control of her body and kill him.
"It's alright, Kell." He slid closer to her, reaching out with calm gestures, "You're safe, nothing can hurt you."
She looked up into his eyes, and a chilling shot of fear spiked down her spine at the sight of his hand coming closer to her.
"No! Stay away from me!" She screamed, scrambling to the corner of his room and curling into a ball.
Her whole body cooled, trembling like a weak leaf in the fall wind. The worst thoughts of how she would lose control and kill him trampling through her mind. Her lungs, simply forgetting how to work, caused her breathing to quicken, setting a pace that couldn't compensate for how much air she needed. Her heart, kickstarted by terror, pounded against her ribcage like a wild horse's hooves. Her pulse hammered in her ears and caused shockwaves of pain to pulse through her chest wringing it up like a knot.
"Hey!" Newt called, slowly drawing himself over to where she sat, "I'm not going to hurt you."
But she put her wavering hands out as a warning for him to not come any closer, stopping him a few feet away, "Please, don't."
"Kelle, let me-"
"No," she cut him off clenching her watery eyes shut.
"Will you just let me bloody help you?" He demanded, his tone becoming stern.
"Please, Newt stop," Her voice cracked, soft and quiet while he took yet another step closer, "I-I don't want to hurt you."
He immediately paused in his movements, and she could see the flash of uncertainty shining in his eyes while his brows twisted together in concern.
Tears unceasingly fell from her fear-stricken orbs while she attempted to pull herself into a tighter ball- to pull herself as far away from Newt as possible.
"Kelle," Newt started, "It was just a nightmare. It wasn't real."
She peeked up at him from behind her arms. Seeing the genuine concern embedded into those ebony pools, caused her mind to reel with the thought of his bloody body lying in her arms, reminding her of the possibility of what she was capable of.
"It could be real," She whispered, shaking her head and burying her face back into the crooks of her elbows.
"What was it about, Kell?" he inquired.
There was no way for her to answer that. There was too much pain caused by watching him get hurt because of her. She would never answer in the truth about the things she saw in her nightmares. Never. She would rather fight ten grievers at once then answer that question.
Her eyes clouded over in a glass encasing of tears, and her breathing quickened. Her entire being that was pressed into the corner of his room was vibrating with fear.
She locked sights with him and her heart seemed to immediately start slowing down while she studied those dark chestnut orbs shining in the moonlight, "I killed you."
She never intended to tell him, but the words slipped from her mouth as a mere whisper that she could hardly hear herself, coaxed out by the boy's presence alone.
He heard it though, because he immediately looked away. She could see the flash of indecision reflecting in his eyes and the way his jaw tensed in worry.
"I'm sorry, Newt," She whimpered, "Please-"
"What the shuck is going on here?" A different voice entered the room. She peeked through blurred vision, over Newt's shoulder at the boy that had walked into the room.
Alby.
She panicked Her heart and lungs tumbling into an uneven race of who could pulse faster. Her ears rang like church bells, blocking out the noises around her.
"A-Alby, I didn't mean to." She sobbed nearly choking on every letter that tumbled from her trembling lips, "I'm sorry."
Newt watched the girl curl into herself, trembling while she sat in the corner of his room. An unfamiliar nagging pain wedged itself in his heart as he noticed the horror strung through her entire person.
He'd never, in the short time he'd known her, seen her so afraid. In fact, he could hardly remember a time when the lightest flash of fear crossed her beautiful features. But now, her whole being was shaking with terror. From those beautiful pools of blue to the strong muscles of her body, down to every last bone, she quaked.
He was unsure of what to do. He never believed that she could hurt him, but she clearly did. With that in mind, he was trying to process how to help her without making her even more uncomfortable than she already was.
That's when Alby entered the room. Probably hearing Kelle from his room, he came to help. At least that's what Newt hoped he was doing.
Kelle was very uncomfortable with her relationship with Alby. Newt knew this. And as he drew closer to her, he became uneasy around the dark-skinned male. Newt didn't know what happened between the two, but the pain, evident in Kelle's eyes, whenever the subject was brought up, didn't go unnoticed by him. It made him question Alby's charade of a gentle and strong leader.
And so, Newt cautiously watched Alby's every move as he came closer to him and the distraught girl on the floor.
"Alright, K, you've got to breathe," he started, kneeling down next to her and placing his rough palm on her shoulder much like Newt tried to do in the first place, "Deep breaths."
He demonstrated with his own breathing, but she just couldn't seem to slow her own.
"I'm- sorry- Alby," She weakly sputtered in between quick breaths, "I- never- meant- to- hurt-"
She just couldn't get the words out, her lungs hyperventilating so much so it twisted into her voice, choking it out.
"Hey it's okay," Alby hushed her, "Who was it?"
Her eyes darted over to gaze at Newt.
The boy still sat a few feet away, watching the scene with concern embedded into his features.
Alby followed her gaze, connecting the dots.
"Alright, K, just breathe," Alby repeated himself, reaching over and grabbing Newt by the back of his neck.
Alby directed the blond to sit next to the girl.
She immediately flinched away keeping her hands tucked as far from Newt as possible, "No- Alby- I- Don't- hurt-"
"Shh, Kelle," He hushed her again, "I won't let you hurt him."
Looking up into Alby's eyes, Kelle could see that he was being genuine and honest with her, but she still couldn't calm herself.
"Listen to me, K," Alby directed her while he moved, "It was just a dream. Just a dream. It wasn't real."
Alby had directed Newt into opening his arms, allowing the girl to fold into his side.
She reluctantly let Alby press her against Newt, and her head dropped to rest on his chest while the boy wrapped his arms around her rattling frame.
Alby picked her small shaking hand up and forcefully pressed it over Newt's heart.
"Now, Kelle, tell me what you hear?" Alby brushed a strand of her hair away with the knuckles of his free hand.
It was silent for a moment until she quietly whispered, "Breathing."
"You know who's it is?" The dark-skinned boy asked.
She barely shook her head.
"It's mine, Love," Newt whispered, after seeing Alby's stare, hinting to give his input. Newt rested his head on top of hers, readjusting his grip around her shoulder.
"Good Kelle, now what do you feel?" Alby continued, pressing her palm even stronger against Newt.
"Warmth, and a heartbeat." She breathed. Her lungs were slowing down, finally taking air in normally. The shaking that had plagued her body, slowly subsided as well while she rested in Newt's embrace.
"That's me, Love," Newt whispered to her before Alby could talk, "I'm right here, Kell. I'm alive, breathing, my heart is still beating."
"But-" She tried pulling away, but her attempt was so weak she could hardly move.
"No, you can't hurt me," Newt tightened his grip, laying his palm over her's on his heart, replacing Alby's hand.
Alby sat back on his haunches, watching Newt soothe what once was his only friend- his only sister.
"But you don't know what I'm capable of," She whimpered. Tears that hadn't ceased since they started the moment she awoke, stung her eyes.
"Oh but I do," He corrected her, "I know how much concern you're capable of, even with people you've barely met- the amount of consideration and love you have towards everyone. I've seen it. You have the strongest will out of anyone in this whole bloody Glade, and there's no doubt in my mind that you'd ever lose it. You've fought monsters bigger than any of us could ever think of, and you've been scarred and hurt beyond imagining, but it's all prepared you for the battles to come."
"I've seen the gentleness of your hands-" He intertwines their fingers together, "your words- your soul- your very existence, and it has made me believe that you'd never be capable of hurting anyone."
She was quietly sobbing, her tears dampening the boy's shirt.
"And no matter what your nightmares twist themselves into," He leans closer, his voice a soft murmur, "I will always believe that."
Her fingers wrapped around a clump of his shirt, desperately holding onto Newt. The steady stream of tears turned to a flow of relief knowing that he's not scared of her. She wept for what seemed like hours but was only for a few minutes.
Newt held her all the while, his thumb tracing lazy patterns on her arm, and his voice quietly hushing her.
Kelle, reluctant to her instincts, snuggled closer to the warmth that Newt's body provided. No one had ever shown her such a comfort, not even Alby.
A warm feeling nestled into her person, bringing a foreign sensation she couldn't quite understand. It was almost like she was outside of the Maze, away from its horrors and the dangers its walls contained. Processing it a little further, she came to the remembrance of that feeling.
Safety.
She felt safe.
Sure she had felt safe in the Glade from the Grievers but this was a whole new kind of safety.
This was a sensation of all of her burdens, all of her pain, and all of her grief being stripped away, thrown over the horizon, and lost to the warmth of the sun.
And that sun was him.
That sun was Newt.
By the time she realized this, sleep had its grip on her consciousness and was slowly dragging her down into its open arms.
And she welcomed it.
She wasn't afraid, despite the history of her nightmares.
She wasn't afraid because she had a warm light to guide her through it.
She wasn't afraid because she had Newt.
I have nothing to say for myself. This was sad as heck and I didn't warn you. Sorry.