Chapter 17
Bobby watched Bomber's reluctant entry into the gym for her first training session. She walked, protecting her injured leg, back, and shoulder. Noting Malika in the gym, Stephanie chuckled, "I see they wrangled you into here too."
Malika's smile warmly. She hoped to make Stephanie's gym time more enjoyable. Up to now, she has been acting like a brat, according to Bobby.
"Bomber, Malika is here as an instructor as well as a fellow rehab patient. Ranger wants her to teach you and eventually everyone here, Systema. Due to her physical limitations right now, we will start slow."
Stephanie looked unsure, "What about my limitations? I don't think I can do anything right now."
"You should be moving better than you are. It's time to increase your muscle and flexibility."
Stephanie almost whined, "But I'm still in pain."
It was the same story day after day. Stephanie was equating rehab with exercise, the Evil E, as she called it. "Malika is going to show you ways to deal with the pain." Bobby also wanted to say, "And improve your outlook." But pointing out Bomber's mental condition would see a return of rhino-mode. The psychologist wasn't getting through to her this time as he had in the past. Bobby looked at Malika. "Can you show her a few Systema moves without endangering your leg and jaw?"
Malika nodded.
"OK," Bobby started, "Realize I am not a Systema expert, so I can't describe in detail what you are seeing. But what I do know is System is built on three pillars: Breath control, Relaxation, Movement with Posture.
"Steph, one of the reasons you faint easily is you quit breathing when frightened or stressed.
The muscles freeze, your body is starved for oxygen, and ultimately you become light headed and even faint."
Stephanie appeared to be listening carefully. Her fainting was always a problem and an embarrassment. However, she didn't see how breathing would help with her pain.
Bobby continued, "Also, for injury rehabilitation, you need to fill you're your body with oxygen. I've noticed each time you experience pain, even a twinge, you tense up and go into shallow breathing. Malika is going to work with you to develop new breathing techniques that will help prevent fainting, but, more importantly, get more oxygen to your former injured area."
Stephanie was muttering, "Former? They still hurt." Bobby ignored her deliberately.
"Most of us breathe with little thought as to how much we are getting in our body. Let's start with little breaths. Steph, take in only enough oxygen to fill your nose."
"What?"
"Imagine only filling your nose with air, not the rest of the body, and then let it out."
Stephanie barely took a breath.
"Now take in only enough to fill the nose and imagine filling the brain. Concentrate on your head."
Steph took a little bigger breath.
"Now take in for the nose, brain, and neck. Then next breath to the stomach and finally, a breath that would send oxygen down to your toes."
When Steph had completed the exercise, Bobby explained, "The initial breathing, nose only, is often what we do when excited or fearful.
We don't correctly fill. Muscles elsewhere become starved for oxygen and start to tense up. On the other hand, did you notice when you over-extended your breathing, how tight your shoulder became? "
Stephanie took another deep breath and noticed how her shoulders rose. "Is that what you mean?"
"Yes, when you breathe, use your diaphragm, sometimes we say breathe from the stomach.
Do not overinflate or attempt to overinflate, or else your shoulders will tense. When you breathe, you should be as relaxed as possible. Another cause of tenseness is fear. If you breathe relaxed, the fear goes away. Muscle tenseness also inhibits oxygen flow through your muscles and body. It's more complicated than that, but one step at a time. So, proper breathing relaxes the body filling it with oxygen, eliminates fear, and aids in rehab."
"You are telling me by proper breathing I won't need to exercise?" Stephanie sounded incredulous.
Bobby chuckled, and Malika smiled. "Dream on Bomber."
Stephanie started breathing but was expelling through her nose.
"Steph, intake through the nose feeds the muscles, exhaling through the mouth clears the body. Socially we are discouraged from blowing out through our mouths, whether it is to hide bad breath or the noise bothers others. With practice, you can learn to exhale through the mouth, discretely."
Bobby watched Stephanie try to be quiet by barely separating her lips. When she allowed her body to naturally empty instead of forcing the air out, she was silent.
Bobby, the instruction, began again, "When we are frightened or concentrating on a task, we often stop breathing. Holding your breath is only a good idea when you are underwater. We need to keep the working muscles oxygenated through the movement. Watch Malika."
Malika got down to the ground, Bobby continued, "Malika is going to do a single, prolonged movement with one breath. Most of us would breathe once and hold our breath through the movement, starving our body for oxygen."
With her hands behind her head, Malika did a single sit-up, slowly while taking in air. Bobby slowly counted to thirty. Once upright, she blew out, and started back down, taking in air with a single breath, again to a thirty count.
"No matter the muscle load, or threat, your body needs to be taking in oxygen." Looking around the gym for a helper, Bobby saw Hector. Calling Hector over, he introduced Malika. "We need an attacker, but keep it simple as Malika's leg and jaw aren't fully operational yet." Turning back to Stephanie, Bobby explained, next is a demonstration of taking in oxygen while countering a threat."
Hector looked to Malika and nodded. With lightning speed, Hector grabbed Malika's wrist, and equally as fast, Malika pivoted, raised the captured arm over her head, and was free. Next, Hector grabber her wrist and arm just below the elbow in an attempt to pin her arm behind her back.
She, in return, seemed to melt out of the grab and twist Hector around, forcing him to let loose. Again Hector grabbed both wrists, and Malika simply raised her hands forcefully, bringing Hector's hands together at the thumb joint, causing instant pain.
Hector let go. Malika quickly overcame each new attack. Hector stepped back and chuckled, "Estás hecho de goma." (You are rubber.)
"Bomber, you may have paid more attention to the movements, not her breathing. During the entire exercise, she never held her breath.
"No matter the convoluted hold Hector put on her, no matter the discomfort, she continued breathing and keeping her body relaxed. Hector said she is made from rubber. By remaining flexible with no tension, your opponent will be less likely to contain you. Plus, by keeping your muscles oxygenated, your body is ready to mount an offensive when necessary."
Malika looked at Steph and signed, "Watch simple move." Then standing back and wiggling her left hand, indicating Hector grab her hand. As he grabbed her, she swung her arm backward, forcing Hector off balance. With a simple shove with her free hand to Hector's hip, he fell.
Malika flashed signs to Bobby, who translated, "System stresses nonviolent defense. Wear the attacker down through repeated defensive moves until they either give up or are so tired, you can overcome them. Hector expended more energy lunging, grabbing and then climbing back to his feet than she did with an arm swing and tap."
"Is that what she did to my mother?"
"Exactly, except Malika didn't want to hurt your mother, so guided her to the ground."
Malika fashed a sign to Tank across the room. The big man walked over, "OK, I'll be your guinea pig."
Malika winked, flashed Tank instructions, and then laid down on her back.
Tank walked around Malika's prone form. Then while standing by her head, he leaned over and fell to the side. Somewhat confused, he got, straddled her by placing his feet beside her hips and quickly reached down to hold her down. Once again, he immediately fell to the floor.
"What the hell?" the big man gasped.
Bobby smiled, "As with Hector, when Tank leaned over, he became unbalanced, and Malika further unbalanced him."
"How, she never moved."
"Through muscle control, she relaxed her one shoulder, rotated it slightly, to throw Tank's balance off."
"She can rotate her shoulder that much?"
"Tank, twist her arm, but keep it straight, for now, don't bend it," Bobby instructed.
Malika was already on her feet. Tank grabbed her lower arm and twisted her arm slowly until her hand was backward. When she began to show discomfort by standing on her toes, he stopped. Malika started a series of short breaths and wiggling her shoulder. Suddenly she stopped and smiled, showing no pain, but Tank had not released her arm.
"I don't get it," Stephanie stated.
"Several things here. First, Malika's tendons are incredibly flexible with exercise. She relaxed her shoulder muscles to where she was no longer afraid of having her arm broken or dislocated. She achieved this with cyclic burst breathing, quickly forcing air in, relaxing and reducing her anxiety and pain."
After tapping Tank to let her go, she asked him to put her into another hold.
"You sure? I might break your finger," he warned.
After assuring Tank it was alright, he quickly bent her finger backward. She reacted as expected, showing pain by again rising onto her toes. After several moments of cyclic burst breathing, she appeared no longer in pain and passive.
Suddenly, though, her other hand came around and grabbed a spot on Tank's neck him to pass out and fall.
Bobby stood momentarily marveling how quickly and smoothly Malika had found the carotid and instantly stunning Tank. "Stephanie, the key to what you witnessed was the cyclic burst breathing. She overcame her fear of injury and the actual pain with quickly filling and expelling air, in a sense revving up her anti-fear and pain cyclic breathing and muscle relaxation. The tap on Tank was just showing off."
Malika reached out and hugged Tank as if asking him to forgive her for picking on him. He whispered something in her ear, causing her to smile.
Stephanie sat and thought a while. How often has she panicked when someone grabbed her? From Joe to her skips, did the fear of being injured or the discomfort control determine why she could not mount a defense? Maybe this also applied to social situations such as Burg gossipers or her mother's tirades. She was so busy worrying what others might think she would tense, unable to react. Hadn't she dealt with Grandma Bella in the market months ago? How had she been able to respond then? Relaying the incident, she realized she had remained calm, realizing the lady's words were irrelevant and useless. Bella's powers came through fear.
By blocking the fear, there was no power. While she pondered, Malika came to stand beside Bobby, waiting for Stephanie to notice they were ready to continue.
"Stephanie, you need to clear your mind and get back to our instruction. Walk around the gym for the next 15 minutes, practicing breathing, nose in, mouth out. Remain relaxed, not overfill. Then start extending the breaths, two counts, three counts, and so on as we watched in the sit-up demonstration."
When she returned after her walk, Bobby was again the emcee. "Steph, we are moving on to fear breathing. Breathe in, exhale, and hold your breath until you feel tension or tightening. Note where it is and resume normal breathing."
"I feel something in my chest," Steph said.
"Good, as you hold your breath again and begin to fell the tension, wiggle your shoulders to relax the upper chest to relax the area. You should enable you to hold your breath longer."
"Huh?" None of that made sense to Steph.
"Scenario time, Steph. You find yourself with a gun in your face. The old Steph would freeze and be taken captive. The new Steph will remain calm by proper breathing and keeping the body relaxed with little movements exercising the whole body to keep it from freezing. The relaxed body can then react."
Stephanie's mind flashed back to times Ranger or other Rangemen found themselves at a weapon's end but didn't cringe in fear. They were relaxed and, when the opportunity arose, reacted swiftly. "So, I'm to dance a jig while someone is threatening to shoot me?"
Bobby had a small smile. The mental image was amusing if not the outcome. "In the future, Malika will teach you how to relax muscles with little or no movement, or jig as you called it. Right now, we'll jig."
Malika and Steph worked together, relaxing and tensing various muscles in the body without tensing others. As she worked on specific areas while keeping the others loose, she noticed how relaxed she was. When Malika had her stand and work her muscles, then slowly walk around the gym flexing and releasing while keeping proper breathing, her gait was changing. She admired the way Ranger walked so loosely, now she understood. Tank, for his size, seemed to float quietly. Was this the reason? They were using only the muscles necessary for the movement while keeping the rest of the body relaxed.
"That's all for today, Steph. Same Time tomorrow."
Stephanie wasn't sweaty as she usually was after her rehab sessions, and she felt far better.
Quickly changing into her Rangeman uniform, she went to her cubicle to run searches and look over new client information. "Damn Rodgriguez, doesn't he have anything better to do than dump all his work on me?"
Forcing herself to examine how she was breathing, she found she was more comfortable in her chair than usual. Was part of her inability to sit still for long periods, due to her unconsciously tensing her body? She tried relaxing as much as possible. Usually, when her butt was numb, or she mind flummoxed with a search, she chewed on her pens or went in search of TastyKakes. Maybe relaxing was better.
Her eyes quickly snapped open. She had a clue! Glancing at the clock, she had spent 30 seconds. How long would she have spun or chewed on her pen, tapped her foot or fingers, played with her curls before? How often did she fail at surveillance because, after ten minutes, she was bored? Maybe there was something to this relaxing and breathing after all.
Reaching for her inbox to start another search, she found it empty. She had torn through the searches in record time. Knocking on Tank's office door, she waited for his permission to enter. Hearing his gruff voice, she came with a smile, "I've finished the searches, do you have something else for me to do?"
He looked up and said, "Bless you, my child. Would you complete these for me?" Handing her a stack of papers. She looked at the familiar forms, "We really must computerize these."
Tipping his head towards Ranger's office, "He has old ways. I've tried. It is your turn to bring him into the 21st century."
Flipping through more pages, Stephanie asked, "Do you want me to set up a format to bring the caveman's mind into the light?"
Unlike Ranger, Tank smiled his bright white, full tooth smile. It was his answer. As she left, he shook his head, wondering how to get her to give up skip chasing, and become a part of the management team.
Practicing her relaxing, standing a wiggling to loosen her abdomen, she continued working until Ranger came and got her at 5 pm. "Babe, it is time to quit."
"What? I've been here working since gym time."
"Didn't your beast remind you to eat?" Ranger asked.
"No, it's been quiet all day. That's not normal." She wondered if the lack of noise had anything to do with her relaxing exercises. "I missed my range time with Ram!"
"He was called out on an emergency. No foul. You can make it up tomorrow. Now come, let's eat dinner. I'm hungry, even if you aren't."
-0-
Shortly after 08:00 the next day, Ram found Steph and invited her to the range. "Time for your lessons, Bomber. Sorry I was away yesterday."
She silently mumbled, "I'm not," but spoke, "I got busy myself."
Once inside the gun range, Ram went to the gun safes, went through the complicated process to enter the security codes, and use the keys to open up the bins. "I received several new handguns, and I want you to try them out. They are better suited to women's hands."
He had six different semiautomatic handguns on the table. "These Sig Saurs and Glocks are better sized for your hand. The difference will be in balance and ammunition carrying capacity. The more ammunition, the heavier the piece. Let's see how each suits you."
Immediately Steph began to tense. She hated guns. Remembering her breathing instruction, and she tried all handguns. Ram watched, fascinated she was not going through her normal facial grimaces. Except when he raised one larger handgun and winced, grabbing her shoulder. Immediately she went to a more rapid cyclic burst breathing, slightly wiggled her shoulder, and seemed to be pain-free. "This one is too heavy, right now," she said as she set it back down on the bench.
After an hour of learning about each weapon, firing, disassembling, and cleaning each, Steph was leaning towards a medium weight weapon for hip-carry but still didn't have a favorite. Ram was understanding and grateful she was careful in her selections. He agreed to get search for several more options. She was due in the gym at 10:30 and had to hustle and broke into a little jog. Whoa!
Stephanie Plum did not jog. What was happening?
-0-
"Good morning, Bomber!" Bobby smiled.
"We have new games today."
"Oh, great," she mumbled. "Yesterday it was breathing, wiggling and walking. What is today?"
"Crawling," Bobby smiled. "You are not strong enough yet for more strenuous exercises. We are going back to your beginning. Baby's build muscle and neuropathways by crawling before they can walk. With injuries, we block pathways for fear of creating pain. Now that we have the breathing technique for reducing tension and pain, it's time to get coordinated again."
Once Steph was on her back on the gym floor, Bobby said, "Without out getting up, ooze your way across the floor for 12 feet. Like an amoeba tense and relax portions of your body to create friction on the ground to move forward. Do this slowly, concentrate on not creating tension areas. Let the muscles do the work and let them relax. Of course, breathe correctly."
Malika got on the floor and oozed alongside her. When Stephanie had gone 12 feet on her back and belly, Bobby stopped her. "Relax and breathe, nose to toes." Malika got to her...foot. She stood using just one leg as she held the orthopedic boot off the ground. Stephanie mumbled, "Show off..."
After a few minutes, Bobby asked, "How do you feel?"
"Relaxed."
"Now that your muscles are warmed up, we are going to put you into a tense situation. As you begin to tense up, notice your tension points, breathe and wiggle," he smiled.
Before Stephanie could understand what he said, Malika did some fancy signs, and several Rangemen came forward. When several Rangeman responded to Malika's invitation, before Bobby could give directions, Malika laid down, face down.
"OK, guys pile on, dogpile," Bobby said. The rest of the Rangemen stacked on top of her. Stephanie cringed, assuredly Malika could be crushed under all that weight.
"Bomber, look at how Malika is breathing. She is rapid cyclic burst breathing to enhance oxygen and to relax. Gradually her breathing slowed down.
"Remember the finger grab Tank put her into yesterday? She was rapidly cyclic breathing to relax." Before Bobby could finish his explanation, Malika was smiling.
"How long do you think it will take Malika to get out from underneath the pile?"
"Quite a while if she doesn't suffocate first."
"Malika."
Within seconds the pile was moving, and not long after, the collection disintegrated. The men fell away. Malika wiggled free.
"She isn't strong enough to move all the weight that was on top of her, but she started by moving whatever she could, remaining calm and without tension, changing the structure and angles within the pile with small movements until it became unstable. Let's try with you."
"Ah, I'm afraid I'll get hurt."
"It will be just Malika and me. We understand about your healing injuries."
When she was covered, she began to panic. Ramon squatted down in front of her, "Breathe and relax, don't tense. Move something, anything."
"I can't."
"Breathe Bomber. Yes, you can, there's always something even if it is your toe. From there, you can push up, down, or to the side."
In time she was moving and eventually unbalanced Malika and Bobby and was able to roll away. When she emerged, she was smiling, "I did it!"
"Pile-on is human Jenga except here we are trying to collapse the pile. Not only was it fun, we learn how not to panic, move our bodies, and a little something about physics. The physical play also helped our mental health. Today's kids don't move from in front of the television or computer screen. They don't learn how to relax through physical movement. So they turn to drugs, alcohol, food, or other addictions for physical relaxation."
"So how does this help me?" Steph asked.
"I'm surprised you need to ask," Bobby said. "Doughnuts, ice cream, TastyKakes…need I go on? Your drug of choice is sugar. If you had alternatives to relieving stress, your need for sugar would drop to near zero."
Stephanie was pissed and wanted to argue with Bobby, but a twinge in her shoulder reminded her, she was tensing up. Her breathing was getting short and unfulfilling. How to relax? Breathe, wiggle, walk. She walked off for a bit and came back. She was surprised to see Malika had several sticks on the floor in front of her. One was a twirling baton. She flashed back to the incident with her baton and the highschool band tuba section and began to blush.
Bobby began, "Bomber, you and Malika are going to teach each other how to work with sticks. You will teach Malika how to twirl, and she will work with you on a little martial arts stick defense."
Malika went to the longer stick and picked it up and held it in an attack position.
Bobby said, "Stick-fighting is common in many different martial arts. She is holding a shinai used in Japanese Kendo. Kendo stresses body posture, striking specific areas. You two will work in slow motion as we don't have the full protective gear to prevent injury. We have guards for the arms and legs only. We don't expect you to become proficient in Kendo, but the movements will help with your back and arms."
"I'm no Bruce Lee," Steph tried to counter.
"He wasn't a Kendo master. The stick is both a defensive and offensive weapon. Here we will stress the defensive aspects. The goal is not to beat the crap out of your opponent but to discourage their continued attack."
"Is this exercise?"
"Did I use the E word? These are movements to loosen your body. Plus, whacking each other is a good stress reliever, something like Ranger beating the bag when he's upset."
"You are pushing this stress issue."
"Yep, it is the basis of many of your problems. Getting you to relax will lessen most of your mental issues."
Hearing mental, Stephanie started to tense up. Was Bobby saying she was becoming mentally unbalanced like her mother?
Bobby read her eyes, "Whoa! Breathe, Bomber, relax. I'm not talking about those mental issues. I'm talking about self-doubt, going into what you call your rhino mode, and so on."
Stephanie muttered, "First doughnuts, now rhino mode. What else is he going to complain about?"
Picking up the batons, he tossed one to Stephanie and one to Malika. Let's start with these batons to warm up your arms."
It had been years since Stephanie held a baton, but the twirling action came back quickly. Being an instructor gave Stephanie's self-confidence a boost. In trying to teach Malika baton twirlers' side circles, swoops, stir the soup, and chicken elbow Stephanie didn't realize she was also exercising her own body, especially the muscles around her arms, shoulders and upper body. When she felt a pinch in her shoulder, she burst breathed and concentrated on relaxing the hurt area.
Malika wasn't as accomplished at Stephanie, slowing down the instruction. After dropping the baton repeatedly, Malika signed it was time to try something different. Picking up the shinai, she went into an attack pose.
Stephanie joined, and they spent 40 minutes whacking each other's padded arms and legs.
When Bobby called a halt and had Stephanie sit and rest, and of course, breathe, Malika picked up a shorter stick about 48 inches long.
"Bomber, watch how effective a simple stick can be." In an instant, he turned and ran towards Malika. Instantly he was on the floor.
"What did you see, Bomber?"
"She tripped you with the stick."
"Why didn't she try to hit me?"
Stephanie thought a minute, "That's what you were expecting. People use sticks to hit. Or maybe you would have grabbed it or avoided it." She wasn't sure.
"Not quite. Malika could have whacked me, but it would only temporarily stun me, and I might not even stop moving. It might have escalated my ager. By tripping me stopped the attack."
"But, you would get up and attack again..."
"And she would have deflected my attack in another manner."
Picking up a club, Bobby once again attempted to attack Malika. This time she deflected the club and, using her braced foot, unbalanced him to where he fell. When Bobby got up, he said, "She would continue to diffuse the situation with the least possible energy expenditure until I gave up, or she would disable me."
"Or until you pulled a gun or knife."
"Speaking of a knife, let's so some more demonstrations. We will cover all this more in-depth over the coming months."
"Months?" Stephanie squealed.
"As a Rangeman employee, you are expected to exercise and train. Or would you rather go back to the treadmill and weights with hand to hand instruction?"
Stephanie paused, was she still and employee? Would she be expected to move back to her apartment when she returned to work? Where was she in her emotional and personal relationships?
Bobby waited for Stephanie to look back at him. Her mind went for a journey, but he didn't know where. Waving to Hector, Bobby turned to Malika, "Hector's favorite weapon is a blade. Would you like to go against him?"
Malika pointed to her jaw and leg and signed "caution." Hector nodded. He still understood the restrictions. Then pointing to the training knife, she indicated this would be the only one used as it was not sharp. Hector nodded again. Malika looked at Hector and gave him the "give it to me" hand gesture. He didn't understand. She signed again, "Your knife, or we do this naked."
Bobby translated, questioning the last word, "Naked?"
Hector smiled and reached into his gym shorts and pulled out a small spring-loaded knife.
Stephanie shook her head, "I won't ask how you knew it was wherever it was."
Malika tossed the training knife to Hector and gave him the come along sign. In an instant, Hector was on his butt, and the blade was at his neck, not hers. Hector countered instantly, putting Malika on her back, but before he could gain control, she rolled and had the knife again at his throat. He smiled. This woman knew her stuff.
"Hector, for training purposes, slow your attacks down so others can see the defensive actions. Also, keep them basic. You and Malika can work on your fancier moves later."
Hector nodded. Time and again, Hector tried to attack, and Malika deflected his arm and took the knife away from him.
Malika flashed signs, and Bobby translated for Stephanie, "Full speed."
In one stunning move, Malika deflected, rolled to her defensive stick, picked it up, and was on her feet as Hector came after her again. With a flick of her wrist, the knife sailed upwards out of Hector's hand.
He mistakenly watched the blade.
Malika used the stick to tap behind his knee, putting him on his back. Malika caught the knife before it reached the ground and jumped on his chest once again, endangering Hector's throat.
Hector smiled.
He came quickly with arm swipes as he regained his feet. As Malika deflected the armed hand and spun him around, he side-kicked towards her arm.
Deflecting the kick, she spun, placing her leg between Hectors and forced him to the ground and again endangering his throat. Hector laughed out loud and indicated he was beaten. Hector stood and kissed Malika's cheek.
Ranger was standing next to Tank well away from the action. Quietly he whispered, "She stays." What he did not say but thought was her skills were higher than anyone he had seen, even his. What did Diesel say? "She has unknown talents."
Malkia went to Stephanie and handed her the knife. Bobby explained, "This is a training knife.
There is no sharp edge or point. She wants to set the scenario of two people walking past one another. Try to stab her."
"Don't throw me to the floor," Steph pleaded.
Malika flashed, "Not, thrown, unbalanced. They fell."
"Still, I don't want to be on the floor."
As Stephanie and Malika walked toward another and Stephanie tried to stab her, Malika quickly moved a small part of her body to avoid the blade and continued walking, never touching Stephanie. The defense was so smooth. Stephanie stood with the knife in her hand with a bewildered look on her face.
"Again, Bomber."
The next time as Stephanie walked by and attempted to stab her, Malika just kept on walking without turning. Stephanie looked down at her hand and noticed the knife was gone, but it wasn't in Malika's hands either.
"Where did it go?"
Malika raised her hands to indicate it wasn't in her hands.
Hector was chuckling as he came up to Malika. Reaching around to her back, he pulled the knife from her waistband.
"I can't wait to show what I'm learning to my fugitives," Stephanie gleamed.
Malkia suddenly stood straight and held up her hands in a "halt" position and glanced at Bobby for an interpreter. She needed her voice right now. With hands flying, she began to realign Stephanie's thinking.
"Do not put your heart or your emotions into your work. The desire to show off increases your expectations and leads to disappointment. Without emotions, everything becomes simple, a job to be completed. You do not do something for glory or to show how good you are."
Stephanie was stunned. Did these words apply to her life? Was she a bounty hunter for the recognition? Was she using it to show up the Burg?
Lester had been standing away from the instruction but came and sat next to Stephanie. "When you let your emotions rule in this work, you will get seriously injured or dead. Do not seek recognition or rewards and ignore criticism except your instructors."
"People like my mother, Joe, and the Burg?"
"They should never have meant anything to you, but you waved your job like a red flag to a fighting bull. "Here, look at me!"
"I did not!"
"Beautiful, each time you came to TPD covered in stuff, you caught their attention. All Rangemen carry a change of clothes, at least a shirt. Why didn't you slip on something clean, zip on a jacket, something to hide the mess? Your hair was often astray, where was your hat? Would it have taken more than 10 seconds to wipe your face and hands? To you, the mess was like a badge of honor, to the rest is was clown paint. You let Joe harangue you, why didn't you turn and walk away? You keep going to the same stores and restaurants where people do the most gossip. Why? Were you holding court? Before your kidnapping, you were doing so well in finding the strong Stephanie. But you've slipped way back. Why?"
"I was hurt."
"No Steph, it is more than that. I hope Malika and our Rangeman psychologist can help you break through this new barrier." With that, he kissed her and went to the showers.