Chapter 15

Hawkes Residence, February 10, 2017, 9:35pm Eastern Standard Time

Elizabeth Hawkes was still curled up on the couch with her blanket, only now, she was holding a cup of coffee in her hands. During her carrier days, she was used to drinking coffee at all hours of the day and night so indulging in a cup so late at night didn't phase her. Besides, she didn't intend to go to bed anytime soon. Harm had left to go back to his apartment a little over an hour ago. Peter, however, was still outside. He didn't go anywhere - he stayed in the backyard - but he wouldn't come inside. Part of Skates wanted to go out there, but part of her knew it would be best to let him decide when he was ready to talk.

It didn't take much longer for that moment to arrive. Before Skates had finished half of her cup of coffee, she heard the back door begin to open. It opened very slowly, as if the person entering were still uncertain if they wanted to come in. Skates heard the squeaking of the hinges, but did not say a word. She did not want to do anything that would interfere with Peter's intentions. Instead, she just stayed there on the couch and watched as he fixed himself a late night snack and drink. Once he had his food and drink with him, he took them into the living room where his mother was and sat in the chair opposite her. He avoided eye contact for as long as he could manage.

"I screwed up," the teenage boy finally said in a quiet voice, but just loud enough for his mother to hear. She wasn't pleased to hear the particular language he had chosen to use, but was appreciative of conversation taking place. Her facial expression was enough for Peter to realize yet another mistake he managed to make that night. "Sorry," he mumbled even quieter.

"I know that your situation is different than that of any of your friends and I realize it is difficult to handle sometimes. I don't know what you're going through, but you know I know what it is like to grow up with struggles," Skates said, trying her best to start the conversation off on the right foot. "I realize that you don't have that second parent to turn to when you can't come to me or when I say or do something you don't agree with. I know your friends have that benefit and you're sometimes jealous of it. That part I am able to understand."

"How?" Peter asked, knowing that his mother grew up with both parents in the picture.

"I don't have a husband to turn to to help make parenting decisions. I don't have another person to share the burden of punishment. I hate that I am the only person in your life that sets boundaries and gives consequences other than school. A child, I mean teen, needs that balance in his life," Skates said to Peter.

"I get that, I do, but you're supposed to also be the only one celebrating my accomplishments, allowing me to have freedoms, and giving me the opportunity to figure out my life for myself. Lately all you do is set more limits."

"Why do you think that is?" Skates asked, already knowing why she did it, but curious to know what Peter thought the answer was.

"Because you're afraid of losing me like you did dad," he said. Skates was silent. That wasn't the answer she was expecting. She was expecting him to say something like, because I keep breaking the rules and losing your trust. The more Skates thought about it, the more she realized that Peter did have a point.

"I guess you're right - partially," she said.

"Partially?" Peter questioned.

"The other part being your disregard for my rules. I understand that you may find some of them too overbearing, but I would much rather us have a conversation about relaxing some of them instead of you blatantly disobeying me," she said, trying desperately not to allow her tone to turn stern.

"But would that actually happen?" Peter asked.

"Have you ever tried?" Skates asked him. He shook his head in disagreement. "Prove to me that you can follow the rules I currently have in place, then we can talk about making some adjustments to them. Does that sound fair?" Skates asked. Peter nodded in agreement.

"Can I say something else?" Peter asked. His mother nodded and waited patiently for him to find the right words to say. "I'm sorry," he said. "And before you say, 'What for?' I'm getting there," Peter said with a small smile beginning to form on his face. Seeing that brought warmth to his mother's heart. "I'm sorry for being such a jerk. I know how sensitive you feel about the life you lived before you joined the Navy. That was a low blow. But I also want you to know that I didn't have any intentions of leaving."

"I know," Skates said.

"You always know," Peter replied.

"Actually, this time I didn't. I needed the help of someone else before I realized it," Skates admitted.

"You know what?" Peter asked. Skates gave him a look of go on. "I needed some of that same encouragement tonight."

"I'm glad that you were able to find someone to talk to when you needed it most," Skates said.

"I wish it could've been you," he replied.

"I don't," Skates said. When she saw the confused look on her son's face, she elaborated. "I don't think we would be having this deep of a conversation if you had come to me first. I'm glad you were able to open up to someone else and that both of us were able to find some middle ground."

"I guess you're right," Peter said. "It was nice having someone around to help us see the other person's side." For the next hour, mother and son spent quality time talking and bonding - something neither had done together in way too long a time.

Harm's Apartment, February 11, 2017, 3:17am Eastern Standard Time -Dream

"Harm! Harm! Harm!"

"Harm, it's cold down here, and I need you."

"I can't do it by myself."

"Help me Harm, come on you promised."

"You promised you'd be there, and I'm holding you to that."

"Now I don't swim well!"

"Temperature's still dropping."

"Commander! Can you hear me?"

"He's bradycardic."

"Take that thing off. Take it off."

Even within his dream, Harm felt a sudden warmth overtake his body.

"Save me."

Harm felt he needed to push through. He needed to try harder. Someone was relying on him and he couldn't let them down.

"I'm trying."

"Pulse rate's up."

"Don't let go! Don't let go!"

Harm could feel himself being pulled closer and closer to reality. He couldn't make out who was within inches of his face, only that they cared deeply about him and were responsible for pulling him through this nightmare.

"Hi."

"Hi, yourself."

"Keep talking to me."

"I…can't…breathe…"

"Oh! I'm sorry!"

He felt a weight being lifted off his chest, making oxygen easier to take in, but he felt the previous warmth begin to leave his body as the one who saved him slowly backed away. Gradually, everything was becoming clear in Harm's eyes. He saw in full view, the woman responsible for saving him, standing right in front of him, gently stroking his right cheek.

"Have we dated?"

"Oxygen."

"You're gonna be okay."

Harm awoke suddenly, realizing what he had just experienced. Part of him was wondering how much of that was fabricated by his own imagination, but his subconscious told him that was how it really happened. Never before did he have a full recollection of the events after his Atlantic ejection - until now. Harm sat up in bed with a million thoughts going through his mind. She saved me. She climbed up onto me, getting as close as possible for warmth and closeness. Her cheek rubbed against mine. She brought me back when I was an inch from death. I asked her if we dated. I was supposed to be the one watching over her and I failed - yet she stayed by my side the entire time.