"Ooh, this is the best one."
"You said that about the last one."
"Well, this one's really the best one."
"And the one before that."
"But this one is the cream of the crop, the truly greatest `I Love Lucy' episode ever."
He shook his head. "You were right the first time. The one where Lucy gets stuck in the freezer is the best one."
"No… that one's really good. It's one of the best. But this one is the best of the best."
"How can this one be the best when twenty-eight minutes ago you were insisting that the one where Lucy and Ethel work at the candy factory was the best?"
"The candy factory episode is pretty great… if only not for this episode, it would definitely be the best. But this episode… this one is the ultimate. The absolute best."
He exhaled, conveying his skepticism in one breath. "Vitameatavegamins?"
"It's iconic, Josh. You'll see. The absolute best."
They watched.
She looked at him expectantly. "Well?"
"It's pretty funny," he admitted.
"And?"
"You were right," he said, hanging his head in defeat. "This is the funniest `I Love Lucy' episode of all time."
"Ha!"
"I will maintain, though, that the candy factory one is a close second."
"Agreed."
He looked over at her. "You sure you don't mind not being with your family for the holiday?"
She looked back at him, her heart full. "Josh. There's nowhere I'd rather be." She took his hand. "Really."
He breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, good."
"Besides, Josh, you're my family now. And I say, new family rule: Christmas morning will always be spent watching an `I Love Lucy' marathon. Plenty of time for the Wisconsonites the day after."
He smirked. "You do like to make rules, don't you?"
"Are you mocking the rules, Joshua?"
"Possibly."
"Don't mock the rules."
"How's this- I won't mock your Christmas rules… as long as you never, ever make me go ice skating again."
"I don't know, Josh. Last time I made you go ice skating I got a diamond ring out of the deal."
Josh sat back, flummoxed. "Huh. I hadn't thought of it like that."
"Yeah. Word to the wise? If you don't want to encourage a girl to do something, don't reward those behavior patterns with expensive jewelry."
He frowned. "Does that mean I really don't have to go ice skating again?"
She stretched on the couch and admired her ring. "I don't know, Josh. We might have to take a spin around the rink next time I need some new accoutrements to go with my latest pair of scrubs…"
He scooted closer to her and kissed her neck. "If by `accoutrements, ' you mean colorful lingerie, you can start calling me Evgeni Plushenko."
She smiled and tilted her head to give him better access. "Aw, you studied figure skating trivia for me."
"Can we at least go during the day time next time?" he pleaded, still kissing her neck. "I'm not sure how many Zamboni payoffs my income will support in a given year."
"Mm," she murmured, her fingers idly toying with the curls at the nape of his neck as he moved up her neck and nibbled her ear. "Did you really have to bribe the Zamboni man?"
"Yeah," Josh admitted.
She turned her head to kiss him. "I still can't believe you did that."
He grinned, and kissed her back. "Best sixty-three bucks I've spent in my life."
And then, for a while, there was no more talk of ice skating.
xxx
The End