Days had gone by, and Lily realized that she had to start planning James's funeral, just as she feared she would have to do before everything fell apart around her.

Plan the funeral - and tell his friends. She felt ridiculous at how much she resented having to do it. This is war, how much of a child are you? Did you expect never to hear or deliver bad news? At the same time, she couldn't help but to feel sorry for herself. I'm the widow here, and absolutely no one will care, except that bastard Sirius, and now I need to go tell him and watch him cry, when it all happened because of him?

Waiting any longer would not have made it any easier. Sirius didn't live far and she took the Underground to clear her mind. It occurred to her that both Evans girls now lived in London - even though they were as distant as they ever were.

She knocked on the door, and to her surprise, Remus was there with him. Saves me another trip , she told herself.

"Well! To what do I owe this pleasure?" Sirius greeted her. "Come here to apologize, I assume?"

Her face hardened. "Not quite, Sirius. Listen, there's something I need to -"

"You've got some nerve, Lily. Prongs and I are a package deal - you can't come between us, especially not after you've run off to live with Snivelly the first time James didn't do everything you wanted him to. "

Lily went white as she always did when she was furious - everything that had happened, happened because of Sirius's little trick, and here he was, blaming her. Before she could speak, Sirius continued his diatribe.

"But I guess I shouldn't be surprised, should I? You never loved him, you always had a problem with him, ooooh, that map should be illegal, ooooh, you have to register - what did you ever like about him, Lily? His money? If you'd really loved him, you wouldn't have made him choose. I never did, I knew he loved you" - he continued without pause - "though I can't say I understand why."

I made Severus choose - I chose for him! Lily thought - because of you. And I thought I was helping him see, and I was the one who was blind - and now look at him.

"Are you done?" She asked, and she never thought she would feel so cold toward someone who was about to get the worst news of his life. Sirius nodded, his contempt apparent.

"What I came here to say, Sirius, is that James has died. He chose you, over me, wouldn't hear a word against you. He's gone. I'm sorry."

Sirius was too stunned to say anything. It was Remus who asked her what had happened.

"Mission for the Order," she improvised. "Top secret." So secret, that even Dumbledore doesn't know about it. But he did do something to defeat You-Know-Who… even if James only did it to try to win her back.

Remus seemed skeptical - "Are you sure? Did you see him? How do you know?"

The thought of James being dragged underwater by dead hands briefly overwhelmed her. "I know," she said. "There's nothing left of him to bury. He - he accomplished his task. It was not in vain. I'm sorry."

"Oh, you're SORRY!" Sirius yelled. "You're not sorry! You and your greasy little friend must have laughed about it for hours, it's what he wanted, I'm sure! This is very fishy, Lily, don't think for a moment I believe a word you -"

"Listen to me, you idiot," Lily cut him off. "I'm pregnant. Do you think I planned to be a widow at the ripe old age of 19? I'm carrying his child, so how is that for loving him? I only came here because he would want you at his funeral, Sirius. I don't give a damn what you think about me."

In Lily's opinion, she was being exceedingly kind, in not telling him it was all his bloody fault.

Suddenly, there was a noise, like bones cracking. Remus began to sprout fur. "PADFOOT!" He screamed, though Sirius was too shocked to react. "Lily, get out of here!" Remus ordered her, and his voice was different, low like a growl. "PADFOOT!"

She saw Remus's teeth growing into fangs, his hands transforming into front legs. A wolf's tail erupted out of his back, and she escaped at the last second, slamming the door behind her. Panting heavily, she heard a roar, and then a scream of pain, and then two howls, growing fainter as she ran out into the moonlit street.

Though she had not been in the room, images flashed through her mind as though she had seen it happen - frozen in his shock, Sirius sat there, defenseless, and he did not transform into a dog, not fast enough in any case, and the werewolf jumped. Or perhaps Sirius had tried to run, but the werewolf grabbed him by the leg, and immobilized him with the full weight of a predator - or maybe he did not believe Remus would really bite him, or his magic had weakened because he was still too grief-stricken. However it had happened, Remus opened his werewolf mouth and exposed his fangs, closed his jaws on Sirius, broke his skin and sunk his teeth into Sirius's flesh, and the claws mauled Sirius, and the werewolf had only enough restraint to not kill, to not eat his friend alive - there must have been blood everywhere. However it had happened, it had happened.

When Lily found herself back at the flat, she could not remember how she got there. She must have travelled by the Tube again, but all she remembered was her escape from the room where Sirius was bitten, and the visions - as real as memories - of the bite. When Regulus opened the door, she was even surprised to see that he was as healthy as she had left him - in her mind, a man who looked a lot like Regulus had just been ravaged, had just transformed for the first time, his bones had just become deformed and his skin had stretched and thickened around them, his mind had involuntarily gone savage, feral, and lost all trace of humanity, and the blood in his veins had become toxic. She knew, in her heart of hearts, that Sirius did not die - he was only overcome by a force much stronger than himself, and that he'd be forced to relive this moment - of hearing of James's death - every month, for the rest of his life.