A/N: Hello! I'm really sorry it's taken me so long to update. I got stuck and couldn't think of a way to move the story forward so I had to take a short break. Then I decided to write this chapter in Edward's POV - it was somehow easier to get into his head than Bella's this time. Hope you don't mind too much :)

Enjoy

Chapter twenty-two

Edward

"Do you really have to play with your food, Emmett?" I said with an eyeroll from the tree branch I was sitting on some hundred yards from my brother and his prey.

Emmett just waved at me cheerfully and continued taunting the great grizzly bear that was furiously swiping its big paws at him.

I sighed, leaning against the tree trunk.

It was the first Saturday of January and Bella had her first Apparition lesson after the disastrous accident. Of course, we all had taken precautions. Esme and Rosalie took little Sarah and were spending the day with Charlie at his house. Alice convinced Jasper to go shopping to Port Angeles with her, even though he would have preferred going with me and Emmett on a whole day hunting trip to the Canadian border where we were just now. Only Carlisle stayed with Bella and Toby, in case there was a need of medical attention. He'd even gotten a magical first-aid kit from Amelia just to be safe.

After a few more minutes, Emmett got tired of his game and finished off the bear with a sudden strike right at the bear's throat. I closed my eyes, leaning my head back. Even though I killed animals to lessen my thirst, I'd never liked seeing them suffer. Emmett, on the other hand, enjoyed the game and found it exciting.

I heard him approach my tree, and in a second, he climbed up and sat down on another branch slightly above me. I opened my eyes and shook my head when I saw the state of his clothes.

Emmett grinned at me. "Did you even eat anything?" he said, waving his hand toward my still clean t-shirt.

"Of course I did." I rolled my eyes again. "Not all of us eat like a savage, you know?"

"Where's the fun in that?" he said with a wide grin. "So," he went on after a short pause. "How's it going between you and Bella?"

I saw in his mind what he meant but I decided to stall, not really eager to give him an answer. "What do you mean?"

Emmett snorted in amusement. "Really? You suck at telepathy if you have to ask that, Eddie."

I kicked him in the knee for that stupid nickname. "We're doing fine, thanks for asking," I said, leaning my head against the trunk again so I wouldn't have to look at him.

Wow, what an elaborate answer! He sniggered in his thoughts, kicking my branch, nearly breaking it in two. "I'd thought you'd loosen up now that you have a girlfriend."

"It doesn't mean I have to talk about it with you," I mumbled, still not looking at him.

"Come on, Edward," he drew out my name annoyingly. "I'll give you some tips if you want." And he started to replay some of his sexual adventures with Rosalie in his mind to make his point.

I groaned. "Stop it!" I growled, but it only made him laugh out loud. I sprang up and threw myself on Emmett so we both came hurtling down to the snowy ground. We pushed around for a minute but ended up laughing. I punched him in the face for good measure before getting to my feet.

Don't be so touchy, he thought at me, but I ignored him, stalking off in no specific direction. Emmett caught up with me quickly, grabbing my arm. "Hey, I mean it. I want to help." I could see in his thoughts that he was telling the truth.

I sighed, turning to him. "Do I look like I need it?"

You've never done it, bro…

I chuckled. "Trust me Emmett, I know how it's done." I tapped my temple. "And as for the tips – you've never been with a human woman, not since you were changed anyway. What tips can you possibly give me?"

"Well, she's still a woman, isn't she?" he said with a shrug and yet again started giving me tips in his thoughts. He laughed as he saw my disgusted expression but then became more serious. "You are planning on it while she's still human, aren't you?"

I blew out a breath, realizing he wouldn't let it go, and sat down on nearby rock. "We want to try. But we're not ready yet," I said, running my hands through my hair.

Emmett plopped down on the ground opposite me, leaning back on his hands. "You have to practice," he said wisely. I still don't get it, though… how do you do it when she smells so good to you?

"I don't know," I said honestly. "I just… can't stand the thought of her being hurt." I closed my eyes, burying my face in my hands. "I was really close to losing control a few times…" I admitted into my palms.

That surprised Emmett. "Really?" I mean… other than the first day and when she ripped her foot off?

I nodded.

… didn't know that… "But still… I can't imagine being around someone who smells so good as she does to you," he said. I didn't last half a second… His thoughts turned to the one time, when he'd run into his own singer and killed the poor woman before he even realized what had happened.

I shuddered internally, grateful that I'd been able to somehow stop myself from attacking Bella the very first day we'd met. I couldn't imagine my life without her now.

"So…" Emmett interrupted my thoughts, getting back to the original topic. "How long do you want to wait?"

I looked up and shook my head to clear my mind a little. "I don't know," I said truthfully. "Not too long, though."

"Yeah, she might attack you soon if you wait too long," he said with a laugh, remembering Bella's sleep talking from the last time she'd spent night in my room.

I rolled my eyes, kicking his shin. "Do you really have to keep embarrassing her?" I asked, half-irritated, half-amused. He had been teasing Bella about it the whole past week.

"Oh, come on! She gives as good as she gets," he said, grinning. It's fun … don't be such a bore.

I ignored his internal jibe, answering only his spoken words. "That doesn't mean she's not embarrassed. She refuses to sleep over again because of you." I frowned, crossing my arms.

Emmett waved it off. "She'll get over it." He then tilted his head and I groaned as I saw what he was about to ask. "Why don't you just change her anyway? It would be so much easier for you." And she said she wants it.

"She's not ready yet. She wants to finish school first," I said through gritted teeth. Although I'd been forced to admit that changing Bella would be the only possible way to continue our relationship, I still didn't like the idea of causing her so much pain. "And I doubt it will be me who will change her."

Emmett snorted. "Of course it'll be you," he said confidently. "And after they come up with the vampire potion, it'll be a piece of cake."

"If they come up with it…" I muttered, staring at the ground. A few days ago, Carlisle and Alice had been asked to go to the Magical Congress for a meeting about the potion. It was still in an early stage, but they needed Alice to see what effect certain ingredients would cause when combined.

Always the optimist… Emmett chuckled sarcastically, shaking his head at me. "I'm sure they will. And then, if Bella goes to Britain, you and me will go with her, kill the bad guys and you will marry her and live happily ever after."

I laughed out loud at his fairy-tale but then frowned at something he'd said. "Wait… you want to go with us?"

"Duh, I thought you were smart." He rolled his eyes at me. "There's no way you'll get all the glory."

I grinned at him, but all the talk about Bella made me miss her even more than usual. I checked my watch and saw that it was time to go.

"Can we go home yet?" Emmett asked. He never bothered wearing a watch.

"Yep."

Emmett got to his feet, grinning at me widely. "Race me?" he asked but before I could react, he shot off. I rolled my eyes after him, slowly getting to my feet. I could give him several minutes of a head start and still beat him easily.

"Next time, I'll get you," Emmett growled after we arrived home. I'd let him lead for most of the journey but right before we reached the stream near our house, I'd shown him the meaning of the word speed.

"Sure you will," I mumbled, not really paying him much attention anymore. I'd just heard my favorite sound in the world and it was coming from my room. Bella's heartbeat. It sounded slow and relaxed, so it meant she was sleeping.

It wasn't that late, so I quickly focused on the thoughts of my family. All of them were home now but Carlisle was in his office, getting ready for a night shift at the hospital. I went straight to him, since he was there when Bella had had her lesson.

Come in, Edward, he thought at me before I reached the door.

I opened the door and saw him standing with his back to the door, putting his things into his medical bag. How was the hunt?

"It was fine," I muttered but I wasn't interested in a small talk. "How did it go with Bella?" I asked, getting right to the point.

Carlisle chuckled, turning to face me. Can't wait to see her… I see… Seeing my impatient expression, he finally let me see Bella's lesson in his mind. I chuckled at his memory of her stamping her foot frustratingly as she'd yet again failed to Apparate.

"So, she didn't do it?"

"No," he answered aloud. "And with you and Jasper gone, she got easily frustrated."

I sighed, running my hand through my hair. I always hated being away from her but seeing that she could have used my help to succeed at something she wanted to do and not being able to be here for her made me feel frustrated as well.

Edward… I looked up at Carlisle as he approached me and gritted my teeth at what he was about to say. "You should stay here, next time." He put up his hands to stop me from arguing. "I am sure you can handle it. You're stronger than you think."

"Carlisle, I…"

Just think about it, son… talk to Bella.

"I… I'm not sure it's a good idea." Pulling at my hair, I started pacing in front of him.

Carlisle put his hand on my arm, stopping me. "Talk to her."

I turned to him, wanting to argue further but his expression and thoughts stopped me. He rarely used his full authority on any of us but now I could see that he meant for me to really do as he asked of me.

"All right. I'll talk to her," I muttered and at once his face cleared and his thoughts turned to another topic, something he'd wanted to tell me since I'd gotten back from the hunt. "What is it?" I asked with a frown.

I've been given a permission to go to the archives at the Congress! Carlisle was suddenly excited, and I couldn't help but laugh. He'd been obsessed with the idea of a connection between the vampire Gifts and magic ever since Bella had come up with it. There hadn't been time or opportunity to pursue this idea until now though.

"You think you can find something?" I was intrigued. The thought of magic having something to do with my telepathy was exciting.

"We'll see! I'm going there tomorrow." Carlisle beamed at me, grabbing his medical bag. I have to go now… see Esme before I leave…

I nodded and we left his office together. We met Esme on the hallway just before I was about to turn to the stairs leading up to the next floor.

"Tell Bella she can stay the night," said Esme after giving me a brief hug.

"I don't think she'll want to," I said with a sigh.

Still embarrassed, isn't she? Esme thought, frowning slightly. I nodded. Poor thing. I'll have a word with Emmett about teasing her like that.

I smiled at her but knowing that she wanted to spend a few minutes with her husband before Carlisle left, I turned and ran up the stairs and straight into my room. I opened the door as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake Bella up.

She lay on her back, fast asleep, with one of my old journals laying open on her chest. I'd allowed her to read them, guessing right that she'd been curious about them but didn't want to appear too intrusive. Sitting on the bed next to her, I carefully took the journal and looked at the page she'd been reading.

I frowned, grimacing uncomfortably. It was about the day I'd contemplated leaving Carlisle and Esme. Although I wanted Bella to know everything about me, it still made me feel uneasy to let her read some of my inner thoughts. Especially the period before I'd left and my four years of rebellion were still painful to remember even now, some eighty years later. Still I knew I wouldn't take the journals from her. She had to know who she would be spending forever with.

I put the journal on the bedside table just as Bella hummed in her sleep, snuggling to my side. I chuckled, amazed as always that she was somehow able to feel my presence even in her sleep. I kissed the top of her head, breathing in her scent, letting it burn my throat. She threw her arm across my chest and stirred a little, burying her face into my chest. I smiled and, knowing that she was about to wake up, took her hand and gently kissed her knuckles.

"Hello, sleepyhead," I murmured and felt her smile against my t-shirt. Then she yawned and slowly raised her head, squinting at me sleepily.

"You're back," she mumbled, her voice still a little raspy. Frowning, she looked around at the clock on the wall. "I fell asleep." Her frown deepening, she sat up, brushing aside her hair that had fallen into her face. "I didn't mean to fall asleep," she said with a pout.

"You're adorable," I said with a chuckle, earning a slight slap over my chest that only made me grin wider. Catching her hand before she could pull it off, I pulled her back to my chest. "Esme said you can stay the night."

"No," she said stubbornly, as I knew she would. "I like the privacy of my room, thanks."

I rolled my eyes, but she didn't see that. "But my bed is more comfortable."

"I don't care."

I sighed. "You're being ridiculous." She looked up at me, opening her mouth but I went on. "You know that they envy you the ability to sleep?" Bella tilted her head in disbelief. "Really. Emmett would give everything to hear Rosalie moaning his name in her sleep." I smirked. It was true.

She stared at me for a few seconds but then shook her head. "No." She sat up again and I knew it was pointless trying to persuade her to stay. She scrambled out of bed and put on her sneakers. "I promised Charlie to tell him how my lesson went." At the last few words, she grimaced. "I didn't move an inch," she grumbled.

I stood up and walked to her, taking her hand. "I know. I'm sorry."

"Of course you know," she muttered with a sigh, tugging at my hand. "Let's go see Charlie."

I sat quietly at the table with Bella and Charlie while they ate dinner, and Bella talked about her lesson. Charlie was relieved that Bella had managed not to hurt herself this time and sympathetic to her frustration.

"I talked to Sue today," Charlie said as Bella did the dishes. She turned around to face him with raised eyebrows and I could sense uncertainty in Charlie's mind.

He'd accepted the fact that he wouldn't be able to see Sue for some time quite well, but it didn't stop him from calling her from time to time. I knew he worried about her living with two young wolves, though as far as we knew there had been no accidents.

"How is she?" asked Bella, leaning against the counter.

Charlie frowned. "I think she knows about the Cullens."

That didn't surprise me. I knew there was a strong possibility that she would be informed about us now that her children had joined the wolf pack. Bella, on the other hand, looked surprised.

"They are allowed to tell her that?" He eyebrows creased and she looked at me. "Didn't they break the treaty by telling her?"

"There are other people who know about us than those that can turn into wolves," I said slowly, holding my hand out to Bella. She walked to me and sat in the chair next to me, taking my hand. I smiled automatically at the warmth of her touch but quickly focused back on the topic. "The families of the wolves are usually told everything, so are their partners, if they have them."

Bella nodded, looking back at her father. "What did she say?"

"She said she was happy you were back with your mother," Charlie said, frowning again.

"Did she warn you to stay away from us?" I asked, curious.

"Not exactly." He paused. "She said 'I'm glad she's safe.' But she could have meant safe from the wolves…"

"No," I said, shaking my head. "I'm sure she meant us. She's in more danger from the wolves that Bella is here."

"I'm worried about the wolves wanting to check on me," said Charlie after a few moments. "Edward, are you sure you'll be able to hear them in time? I know you said you would but…" he trailed off, shrugging.

"Bella is at my house all day and I'm here at night. I'm sure I'll be able to hear them. They don't know how my mind reading works, that I can hear them from miles away."

Charlie felt a little calmer after my words. He glanced at the clock on the kitchen wall and said, "Well, that's a relief. Anyway, the game starts in five minutes, so…" He gestured towards the living room, looking at Bella.

"Go Dad," she said, giving him a small smile. Charlie got up and walked into the living room.

"Can we talk about something?" Bella asked me half an hour later when we were alone in her room.

"Of course," I said, pulling her into my lap and leaning against the headboard of her bed.

She chewed on her bottom lip, seemingly unsure how to begin. I tried to be patient but, as usual, failed miserably.

"Bella?"

"Um… I was wondering…" she started, hesitating again. Seeing my impatient expression, she finally went on. "I think you should stay with me when I have my next Apparation lesson." She said it very quickly.

I stared at her. Had Carlisle talked to her about it? It was suspicious that both of them brought it up the same day.

"Did Carlisle put you up to this?" I asked, trying to sound calm. I gritted my teeth to keep my temper under control.

"Well… we might have talked about it a bit, yeah." Her cheeks turned red and she lowered her eyes to my chest.

I sighed, lifting her chin with my finger. "I already told Carlisle that it's not a good idea."

Bella narrowed her eyes at me, her shyness suddenly gone. "Why not?"

Seriously? "Well, I don't know… maybe because I don't want to kill you."

She rolled her eyes at me, which made my temper rise even more. I pressed my lips to stop myself from snapping at her.

"You wouldn't kill me, Edward. You're stronger than you think."

I closed my eyes tightly, pinching the bridge of my nose. "Why does everyone think that?" I muttered, not sure she could hear me.

She had. I felt her warm palm on my cheek and opened my eyes. Her face was nearly touching mine and her big chocolate brown eyes were staring into mine. "Because we all know you." I took a breath to argue but she put her palm over my mouth. "We do! Carlisle knows you better than anyone. And if he thinks you can handle it, I'm sure it's true."

Gently, I removed her hand from my mouth. "Carlisle has never met anyone, whose blood smelled to him like yours does to me. He can't possibly know how that feels."

Bella crossed her arms across her chest. "You know, Carlisle told me about Emmett. How he killed the woman that smelled to him as I do to you." I closed my eyes again. I hated losing arguments and it looked like Bella was, yet again, ready for everything I said. She went on. "You resisted me even the first day."

"Only because Alice had showed me what would have happened if I attacked you," I said, but I could feel my will slowly weaken.

She wouldn't give up. "I heard it's impossible to resist. That nothing can stop the vampire from attacking. You stopped." I opened my eyes to see her shaking her head with a small smile. "Then you started talking to me, seeing me, kissing me. We've even talked about having… sex." Bella's cheeks turned red again, but she didn't look away.

I lifted my hand and touched her still red cheek. "Why it's so important to you that I stay?" I whispered.

Now she did try to look away, but I held her face, making her look into my eyes. I could tell she found my question uncomfortable, but I needed to know.

"Because…" she started and again tried to look away. My hold was firm. She took a deep breath and went on. "Because your presence calms me. I couldn't concentrate today. I kept thinking about… things I always try not to think about."

I sighed. I didn't have to ask what things she'd meant. She had gone through a lot during the past months, maybe even years. I was sure there were still things she hadn't told me about.

When I didn't say anything, she pressed on. "The other person that can keep me calm is Jasper. I can't possibly ask him, Edward." I shuddered internally, remembering how my brother had nearly killed her. "You can do it. I know you can."

"If I hurt you – "

"We'll make a lot of precautions. We already did today. I took a break after every fifteen minutes, so I wouldn't get tired. We'll cast the Shield charm around the clearing. And Carlisle would be there with you."

I chuckled, shaking my head. "You've clearly thought it through."

Bella smiled. "Yeah. Will you think about it?"

I rested my head against the headboard, closing my eyes. Could I really do it? Was it possible that they were all right? That I was really stronger than I thought? The thought of hurting Bella in any way was physically painful, and it was that that kept me from losing control around her. If she really struggled to focus without me, then I had to do something about it.

I opened my eyes. She was watching me intently, so I slowly nodded. The smile that spread across her face was breathtaking.

"Thank you," she whispered, leaning forward to kiss me.