I really hope most of those reading this story have not had to face the horrible and degrading fan girl test men / boys sometimes do.

If you have, I hope you know you are not alone, and that those who do such tests are not really fans. They are bullies.

Celia watched as Sammy held up a sheet of paper, "So I think Bluestreak G1 with Crosshairs Movie-verse are an adorable set of parents."

The details on the picture told her the sparkling would favor more of Crosshairs faceplates, but have Bluestreak's chevron and door wings. The collapsed parachutes next to the sparkling looked adorable.

Jackie held up her tablet, "Cliffjumper and Elita-One."

Celia nodded at the picture of a dark pink femme sparkling with the look of Cliffjumper about to tackle a huge enemy, "Picture: Sells it."

"Of course. They'd make a really cute sparkling," Jackie settled back, "Hard to beat it."

"Mine is a little unconventional and I had to commission it since there was no picture out there," Darla smiled hesitantly, "Metroplex and Inferno. Isn't he adorable? I love the horns on his little helm. I had them add a city next to him for scale."

"He has a little fire engine toy," Annie oohed over the picture.

Linda held her picture, "Wheeljack G1 and Drift Movieverse," the revealed picture made Celia purred at how the sparkling looked so happy banging a wood sword on their pede.

"I'm a traditional pairing fangirl," Brandy flipped out her phone, "Sunstreaker and Sideswipe with Bluestreak. Aren't these twins adorable? Plus, they are femmes. They'll break sparks when they are older."

"I think mine edges you out," Annie offered hers, "Blaster G1 with Jazz Movieverse crossed with Bumbleebee of Bumblebee movie. Love of music plus look at his personality. Those big optics really pull at the spark."

A collective ahh rounded the group.

All eyes turned to Celia.

She felt a little worried about her choice, but went with it, "Sparkling parents: Soundwave Transformers: Prime," the collective gasps made her a little nervous, "Ratchet Movieverse, IDW Prowl, Jazz G1. Sparkling: Superior."

She showed the picture on her phone.

"You sold me entirely," Sammy made grabby hands, "Send me that picture. I need it on my phone."

"I'm torn between mine and that gorgeous sparkling. Commissioned?" Darla asked.

Celia smiled sadly behind her mask, "Affirmative."

Annie looked at Celia, "Martha's?"

"Affirmative," Celia carefully sent the picture to Sammy.

Sammy blinked back tears, "Thanks."

"Appreciation: Noted."

Celia battled with her grief a moment, wanting to cry where her mask and visor hid her face from perusal.

Annie opened her mouth.

Then an unwelcomed voice preceded an interloper, "Oh look. It's fake fan girls."

Her anger boiled as DumbDumb appeared, a large cup in hand while flanked by the two cronies she identified on his social media posts.

"Can you actually name who the voice actors are for who you are costumed as?" He continued in a mocking tone.

Snickers from his two buddies made her clench her fists under the table.

"We are content with our topic. No need for your suggestion," Annie smiled politely.

"I think it separates the posers from the real fans," DumbDumb leaned down on Darla, "Just like that costume shows you don't have the body to pull it off."

Celia smiled like she threw daggers at the boy, "Voices: Which universe?"

"What?" DumbDumb appeared baffled.

"Voices: Which universe?" She repeated slower and with thick disdain.

"Does it matter?" He snorted.

"Voice Actors: Specific to universe. Lack of response: You are fake fans."

Annie's foot tapped hers, as if to say, "Don't fight."

"We're fakes?" DumbDumb circled around to her, "What's a boy sitting at the girl's table? You a 30 year old virgin?"

Celia snorted, "Sexual status: Superfluous. Knowledge: Superior."

"When did G1 come out?"

Celia answered with the year and then countered: "G1: First transformer toy?"

"Soundwave, like everyone knows that," he scoffed, "Which season and episode did Spike have his accident?"

"Autobot Spike: Season two, episode one. Air date: Sept 23rd 1985. Toy: With longest run from G1?"

He blinked, "Bumblebee, obviously."

"Statement: Incorrect," she watched his face flare with color, "Longest run: Soundwave, with three rounds."

DumbDumb asked through clenched teeth, "Name the dinobots in reverse order of introduction."

"Universe?" Celia asked calmly.

"G1," he snarled.

Celia replied, "G1 Dinotbots in reverse introduction; Swoop, Snarl, Sludge, Slag and Grimlock."

"That isn't right," DumbDumb smirked, "Poser."

Leaning back with amusement she replied, "Order: Correct. Recommend: Rewatch S.O.S. Dinobots and War of the Dinobots, in reverse order."

DumbDumb growled, "Poser."

"Soundwave: Superior. Poser boy: Inferior."

DumbDumb shook his head, "In your dreams."

She stood, straightening to her full height, "Poser boy: Incorrect answers two out of three. Soundwave: correct answers three out of three."

DumbDumb growled, "True fans aren't limited to one universe."

"Alternative universe: Name?" She asked.

"Micheal Bay's movies. Actor's name for main hero."

"Actor: Live action main hero, or voice actor main hero?" She countered easily.

"Live!" He hissed.

"Live action actor main hero: Shia LaBeouf. Character: Samual Witwicky. Director's main reason for changing Bumblebee's alt-mode?"

"Camaro is cooler," DumbDumb chuckled.

"Statement: Incorrect," the smile slid from his face as Celia continued, "Director viewpoint: Original alt-mode too reminiscent of Herbie the Love-bug."

"That's a lie."

Celia opened her phone, clicked the extras and then let them listen to the special feature.

As the director scornfully commented on Bumblebee's alt-form, DumbDumb started shaking, his face getting redder and redder in his anger.

She put her phone back into the pocket, leaned into his space, "Soundwave: Superior. Poser: Inferior."

He splashed her with his drink, "Oh, look. You ruined your costume."

She laughed, making DumbDumb back up in alarm, his two buddies shifting uncomfortably.

In a dark tone, she replied, "Response: Inferior. Mental war: Concluded. Outcome: Fangirls are the victors."

She resisted responding to three incidents which occurred at the same time: DumbDumb tossing his emptied cup at her, something wriggling near her hidden pockets under her chest frame, and something pulling on a buckle in her leg piece.

"Fucking fake fan," DumbDumb walked away, "Clean up this mess."

"Poser response: Forfeiting battlefield forever."

"Dream on bitch," he yelled back as he left.

She looked down, "Soundwave: Clean-up needed. Return: ten minutes."

Walking into the bathroom, Celia resisted smirking.

Fake fan boys: Zilch. Fangirls: Superior.