Chapter 19

I leapt up at the bastard's appearance.

"I found this at the base of the Whomping Willow, very useful Potter, I thank you…"

So Harry had it, the thought might have been a nice one if I wasn't more preoccupied with Snape pointing his wand at Remus. The hate that still came off the little snake. Oh he looked so full of myself.

"You're wondering, perhaps, how I knew you were here? I've just been to your office, Lupin. You forgot to take your potion tonight, so I took a gobletful along. I saw you running along this passageway and out of sight."

"Severus-" Remus tried.

"I've told the headmaster again and again that you're helping your old friend Sirius Back into the castle, Lupin, and here's the proof. Not even I dreamed you would have had the nerve to use this old place as your hideout-"

"Severus, you're making a mistake. You haven't heard everything- I can explain- Sirius is not here to kill Harry-"

"Two more for Azkaban tonight. I shall be interested to see how Dumbledore takes this… He was quite convinced you were a harmless, you know, Lupin… a tame werewolf-"

"You fool, is a schoolboy grudge worth putting an innocent man back inside Azkaban!" How was Remus surprised? Snape was a bad egg that was never going to get better. Snape bound Remus and I took action, leaping forward as I shouted in anger. How dare he! I fell back as Snape got his wand up too quickly.

"Give me a reason. Give me a reason to do it, and I swear I will."

I glowered with hate at the wanker, time hadn't changed him in the slightest. Still the nasty, nosy little bastard he'd always been. It would have served him right back then...

The girl, Hermione, Remus had called her, stepped up. She asked if they should hear us out, and as nervous as she seemed… I was shocked by her bravery. Not that it meant much to Snape, of course. He screamed at her, like a lunatic. I would know, wouldn't I? Merlin he was despicable. No better as a teacher, than he'd been as a student. A worthless waste of space.

I jerked backwards as sparks flew from the wand, brushing my face, searing with heat. I swallowed, but hardened my gaze as Snape looked triumphantly at me. Bloody bastard. For this to still mean so much to him… ridiculous.

"Vengeance is very sweet. How I hoped I would be the one to catch you…"

"The jokes on you again Severus," I snarled. "As long as this boy brings his rat up to the castle, I'll come quietly." I said, jerking my head to indicate Ron. I couldn't care less… just as long as Peter was taken down.

"Up to the castle?" Snape was too pleased, and I raised my eyebrow. "I don't think we need to go that far. All I have to do is call the Dementors once we get out of the Willow. They'll be very pleased to see you, Black… pleased enough to give you a little kiss, I daresay…"

The… he... even Snivellous, wouldn't? Oh… I felt a cold shiver run up my bones. My throat dried up as I looked at the glee on my face. Oh he would… no… no, no I couldn't. Not again, never again… I'd rather Snape just kill me. It would be better, and… after all the years of torment, not the kiss…. I would rather die any other way. I didn't want to see it all again, have it be my last tormented moment. To waste away, gone but unable to really be gone.

Maybe I could get him to listen….

"You-" I swallowed the dryness in my throat, and the panic. "You've got to hear me out, the rat… look at the rat-"

Oh, but Severus was never going to listen to me… was he? I was doomed… and Peter was going to go free. Free to escape or to harm Harry, especially now that they knew the truth. Peter wouldn't let them get back to the castle. Snape wouldn't see it coming… I had to do something. When we got to the passageway, I'd take him. He couldn't keep track of all of us.

"Come on, all of you. I'll drag the werewolf. Perhaps the Dementors will have a kiss for him too-"

Harry suddenly stood in front of the door and I halted in the step I took.

"Get out of the way, Potter, you're in enough trouble already. If I hadn't been here to save your skin-"

"Professor Lupin could have killed me about a hundred times this year. I've been alone with him loads of times, having defense lessons against the Dementors." Right, and him hearing Lily… oh Merlin. I knew the pain they caused… and I couldn't bear that Harry had to feel it too. Also on my behalf. I'd caused this boy so much pain. At least Remus had done something for him, Harry had had someone at least.. "If he was helping Black, why didn't he just finish me off then?"

"Don't ask me to fathom the way a werewolf's mind works. Get out of the way, Potter!"

Racist little bastard.

"You're pathetic! Harry yelled. "Just because they made a fool of you at school you won't even listen-"

"Silence, I will not be spoken to like that!" Snape shrieked, he was pathetic. "Like father, like son, Potter! I have just saved your neck; you should be thanking me on bended knee! You would have been well served if he'd killed you! You'd have died like your father, too arrogant to believe you might be mistaken in Black - now get out of the way, or I will make you. Get out of the way Potter!"

Anger pounded in my blood as he spoke on James. On us, telling Harry things as if he knew anything about what happened! He was no expert. What the hell did he know! Nothing! I may have played a part in their deaths… but hearing Severus saying it made me quiver with rage again. Despite my predicament.

Harry raised his wand! "Expelliarmus!" the three yelled in unison, the power of the disarmament throwing the lanky man through the air and into the back wall. Bloody hell. I glanced between the children in mild shock.

"You shouldn't have done that," I muttered, concerned. This could get him in real trouble, and clearly the bastard held his grudge with us against the younger boy. How he could treat Harry that way over their own rivalries…? It was just a testament to how right I'd always been about Severus. He really was worse than I could have ever imagined. "You should have left him to me…"

It was my job to protect Harry, afterall… not the other way around. The girl started to panic. I glanced back at Ron, noting his hands still covering the writhing beast in his pocket. Good. I moved, crisis averted and leaned down to untie Remus. He had cast the curse, especially tight so it took a moment to undo them.

"Thank you, Harry."

"I'm still not saying I believe you."

But he did, didn't he? He had to at least have an inkling. I couldn't quite ignore the bit of hope there at the idea. It felt impossible. But, it was all the truth. Maybe Remus had been right to explain things to them.

"Then it's time we offered you proof. You boy- give me Peter, please. Now."

Finally. After that interruption I didn't have time to waste waiting!

"Come off it," The boy said, pressing the rat close to his chest. "Are you trying to say he broke out of Azkaban just to get his hands on Scabbers? I mean… okay say Pettigrew could turn into a rat- there are millions of rats- how's he supposed to know which one he's after if he was locked up in Azkaban?"

"You know, Sirius, that's a fair question." Remus frowned as I turned to look at him. "How did you find out where he was?"

I reached inside my tattered robe and pulled out the wrinkled newspaper article that started it all. I flattened it out against my palm before holding it up to show. The thing that sparked my obsession. The family captured inside moved around and Peter perched like a prince on the boy's shoulder.

"How did you get this?" Lupin seemed shocked.

"Fudge," I shrugged. "When he came to inspect Azkaban last year, he gave me his paper. And there was Peter, on the front page… on this boy's shoulder… I knew him at once… how many times had I seen him transform?" I muttered, fresh memories waving over me. After all Remus' had said of their childhood. "And the caption said the boy would be going back to Hogwarts… to where Harry was…"

"My God… his front paw…" Remus whispered, he saw, didn't he?

"What about it?"

"He's got a toe missing," I said emptily. The last moments of their battle playing out behind my haunted eyes.

"Of course… so simple… so brilliant… he cut it off himself?"

Uh uh, the little worm. Truly… it had been a brilliant plan. The coward.

"Just before he transformed, when I cornered him, he yelled for the whole street to hear that I'd betrayed Lily and James. Then, before I could curse him, he blew apart the street with the wand behind his back, killed everyone within twenty feet of himself- and sped down into the sewer with the other rats…"

"Didn't you ever hear Ron… The biggest bit of Peter they found was his finger.

Yes, and it was all true. That bloody wanker… destroyed everything in a single night. All Peter had to live with was looking over his shoulder. While everyone else was dead, or as good as.

"Look, Scabbers probably had a fight with another rat or something! He's been in my family for ages, right-"

"Twelves years, in fact," Remus said. "Didn't you ever wonder why he was living so long?"

"We-we've been taking good care of him!"

Oh I had had enough! Look at Severus finding them! This has taken too much time! If they didn't understand by now, it was no longer my concern.

"Not looking too good at the moment, though, is he? I'd guess he's been losing weight ever since he heard Sirius was on the loose again…"

"He's been scared of that mad cat!"

That pulled my attention from my short fuse for a moment. I could have never gotten this close to Peter without him! Without the kneazle… I'd dare say this moment wouldn't have happened at all!

"The cat isn't mad," I croaked. I reached out and stroked his head. "He's the most intelligent of his kind I've ever met. He recognized Peter for what he was right away. And when he met me, he knew I was no dog. It was a while before he trusted me…" It had taken quite some time. He was as intelligent as he was guarded, and it wasn't for a bad reason. The two of them didn't act like wizard Animagus normally would, having to hide out after all. "Finally, I managed to communicate to him what I was after, and he's been helping me…"

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked, shocked.

"He tried to bring Peter to me, but couldn't… so he stole the passwords into Gryffindor Tower for me… As I understand it, he took them from a boy's bedside table."

Oh, I had felt so close that day, it had felt the perfect time. I didn't get the chance of course, but… it was the best I could hope for.

"But Peter got wind of what was going on and ran for it…" I growled, glaring at the writhing rat, listening to all they were saying. If he could hear it over his own cries. I should never have waited the night. Peter must have heard the passwords were missing. "This cat- Crookshanks, did you call him?- told me Peter had left blood on the sheets…. I supposed he bit himself. Well, faking his own death had worked once…."

Why wouldn't he do it twice? He had never been very clever and who would miss a rat?

"And why did he fake his death?" Harry was back in the conversation, furious as hell. "Because he knew you were about to kill him like you killed my parents?"

"No," Remus started. "Harry-"

"And now you've come to finish him off!"

Harry didn't understand, or didn't want to, and I couldn't let myself care. I had to simply do what I came here to do. I tried to make him understand, if he couldn't, then I had to be okay with it. Nothing would stop me here.

"Yes, I have," I said, committed to my words, glaring at the little bastard. Oh and I would make him pay.

"Then I should have let Snape take you!"

"Harry," Remus rushed. "Don't you see? All this time we've thought Sirius betrayed your parents, and Peter tracked him down- but it was the other way around, don't you see? Peter betrayed your mother and father- Sirius tracked Peter down -"

"That's not true! He was their secret-keeper! He said so before you turned up. He said he killed them!"

Harry pointed at me, with all the hatred in the world. I was silent for a moment, only able to shake my head. I could feel my eyes growing wet, at how much this boy hated me. I couldn't not care, as much as I should. As much as it would help the situation. I owed him the truth. Let him feel how I did with it.

"Harry…" I said, speaking my Godson's name for the first time since he was just a baby. "I as good as killed them. I persuaded Lily and James to change to Peter at the last moment, persuaded them to use him as Secret-Keeper instead of me… I'm to blame, I know it…."

I added, speaking as the broken man I was. I was the deciding factor… if I'd only stayed the Secret Keeper… no one would ever have gotten me to talk. Never. Not for anything. Why hadn't I? I doomed them with my own supposed cleverness. Clearly Harry didn't see it, though. Remus was right, I still owed him my truth. Whether he believed it or not, I owed it to that baby being pulled out of the rubble of his home.

"The night they died, I'd arranged to check on Peter, make sure he was still safe, but when I arrived at his hiding place, he'd gone. Yet there was no sign of a struggle. It didn't feel right. I was scared." I muttered, the feelings… the panic of that night settling in over my mind. I had thought something happened to Peter, been scared for him, of all the things.. I'd been so naive. "I set out for your parent's house straight away. And when I saw their house, destroyed, and their bodies…. I realized what Peter must've done… what I'd done…"

My voice gave up on me, and I turned away, too ashamed to face their son. I was drowning in it again, as surely as if Demtnor was pulling it over me. Reeling from the image, burned in my mind by guilt and the Dementors, of James' dead eyes staring off, Lily's limp wrists in my hands. Harry's face slashed open, bleeding and taken away, cursed to hear these moments later. My home and family broken around me. It was all my doing… and I'd failed the people I loved most so spectacularly.

"Enough of this," I heard Remus, angry, as he rarely was, above the painful pounding in my chest. "There's one certain way to prove what really happened. Ron... give me that rat."

"What are you going to do with him if I give him to you?"

"Force him to show himself, if he really is a rat, it won't hurt him."

The boy finally held out that traitor and Remus took him, holding tightly as he flipped around himself trying to get free. Good… I swiped at my eyes, cleared my throat, - and my heart- ready to finally be done with this. With the pain so fresh, spoken aloud for the first time… I wanted to end him all the more.

I stood, walking next to the bed and picked up Severus' wand.

"Ready, Sirius?" Remus asked as I turned. I stepped up next to Remus, looking down on him, at long, long last.

"Together?" I muttered.

"I think so," Remus spoke, and in his voice, I could hear the same dedication I felt. The same anger. Someone understood. I wasn't alone. "On the count of three."

I raised the wand, readying myself. "One- two- three!"

Then, at last, in front of me stood my enemy. The murderer of Lily and James… who orphaned Harry… and blamed it all on me. The man I was going to kill.

"Well, hello, Peter," Remus said calmly. My skin crawled. "Long time, no see."

"S-Sirius… R-Remus…" Peter spoke and anger clawed in my belly. "My friends… my old friends.."

A snarl spread across my gaunt face and I raised my wand, the killing curse on my lips. Remus, though, grabbed my wrist with a nasty look. I sneered. Why wait?! We'd proved it to Harry and the bastard stood before them. Remus played pleasant talk and Peter begged, but the angry roar in my mind tuned it out- a low, chant almost… reminding me why I was here. What I needed to do, what I had to do! To see him in person… it was too much to bear. To wait.

"He's come to try and kill me again!" Peter's shriek pulled my focus and I bared my teeth at him. "He killed Lily and James and now he's going to kill me too… you've got to help me, Remus,"

I stayed still, by sheer force of will as my eyes borrowed into Peter's small beady ones. Sweat poured down his face and I wondered how painful I could actually make it.

"No one's going to try and kill you until we've sorted a few things out," Remus said, and I almost corrected him. I might. I wanted to. But I waited… Peter surveyed his options out but he understood he was trapped alright. That was why I brought him here after all. Why not draw it out if it tortured the little git?

"Sorted things out? I knew he'd come after me! I knew he'd be back for me! I've been waiting for this for twelve years!"

"You knew Sirius was going to break out of Azkaban? When nobody has ever done it before?"

Merlin, he was so stupid. Peter couldn't lie his way out of a box… yet, he'd fooled them all, hadn't he? Poor stupid, helpless Peter. It was no wonder everyone believed his story. Maybe I would have as well.

"He's got dark powers the rest of us can only dream of! How else did he get out of there? I suppose He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named taught him a few tricks!"

Something snapped in me, to hear Peter's delusional speech. To hear him project his own lies, his own life onto me. Oh that little bastard… and I laughed, oh I laughed at the sheer anger and hatred I had for our once friend.

"Voldemort, teach me tricks?" I asked. Peter flinched, as if he could sense all I had coming for him.

"What, scared to hear your old master's name? I don't blame you Peter. His lot aren't very happy with you, are they?"

I asked, starting the torture. Oh, the things I'd heard, the things I'd suffered.

"Don't know what you mean, Sirius-" Peter gasped.

"You haven't been hiding from me for twelve years, you've been hiding from Voldemort's old supporters. I heard things in Azkaban, Peter… They all think you're dead, or you'd have to answer to them…." I paused, relishing in the anguish and the sweat rolling off his face as he heard his fears being realized.

"I've heard them screaming all sorts of things in their sleep. Sounds like they think the double-crosser double-crossed them. Voldemort went to the Potter's on your information… and Voldemort met his downfall there. And not all Voldemort's supporters ended up in Azkaban, did they? There are still plenty out here, biding their time, pretending they've seen the error of their ways…"

I paused and then stared menacingly at him.

"If they ever got wind that you were still alive, Peter-"

"Don't know… what you're talking about…." Peter wrung his face on his sleeve, his breathing heavier as fear seemed to roll off of him. "You don't believe this- this madness, Remus."

Oh, he was stretching now, wasn't he?

"I must admit, I have difficulty understanding why an innocent man would want to spend twelve years as a rat.

"Innocent, but scared!" Peter bawled. "If Voldemort's supporters were after me, it was because I put one of their best men in Azkaban- the spy, Sirius Black!"

"How dare you," I growled deeply. It vibrated along with the anger in my chest. "I, a spy for Voldemort? When did I ever sneak around people who were stronger and more powerful than myself? But you, Peter- I'll never understand why I didn't see you were the spy from the start. You always liked big friends who would look after you, didn't you? It used to be us... me and Remus… and James…"

"Me… a spy… must be out of your mind… never… don't know how you can say such a -"

"Lily and James only made you Secret Keeper because I suggested it," I hissed, anger taking over as I took one large step towards him. "I thought it was the perfect plan… a bluff… Voldemort would be sure to come after me, would never dream they'd use a weak, talentless thing like you…. It must have been the finest moment of your miserable life, telling Voldemort you could hand him the Potters."

Peter just babbed about how deranged I was… and maybe I was, but oh… if only I was wrong. The little bastard would never admit it. The girl spoke up, asking if Peter was really the traitor why he wouldn't have finished Harry off before. I nearly scoffed, but my throat wouldn't allow it. Oh he thought he had an out, I withered with hatred.

"I"ll tell you why,'' I spat. "Because you never did anything for anyone unless you could see what was in it for you. Voldemort's been in hiding for fifteen years, they say he's half dead. You weren't about to commit murder right under Albus Dumbledore's nose, for a wreck of a wizard who'd lost all of his power, were you? You'd want to be quite sure he was the biggest bully on the playground before you went back to him, wouldn't you? Why else did you find a wizard family to take you in? Keeping an ear out for news, weren't you, Peter? Just in case your old protector regained strength, and it was safe to rejoin him…"

That was right, I could see it in my enemy's eyes. I had plenty of time to think it out, while I waited of course. Peter had nothing to say, being so utterly found out. I had had so many years to think about who Peter really was, what his motives really were. Over and over and over.

"Mr. Black- Sirius?"

I jumped at the girl talking to me. I could only stare at the girl who was asking my permission for… for something. I blinked a few times, but I couldn't really find my voice. It was so foriegn to… well to be spoken to, and now about.

"If you don't mind me asking, how- how did you get out of Azkaban, if you didn't use Dark Magic?"

"Thank you!" Peter answered first. "Exactly! Precisely what I —

His desperate pleas. I almost ripped Peter's head off for talking to the brave young woman. Remus got him to shut the hell up first, though. Everyone looked at me. I thought about it for a moment, staring at the young lady and trying to pinpoint exactly how to answer it… there were so many parts, after all.

"I don't know how I did it," I replied honestly. "I think the only reason why I never lost my mind is that I knew I was innocent. That wasn't a happy thought, so the Dementors couldn't suck it out of me… but it kept me sane and knowing who I am… helped me keep my powers… so when it all became..." When it all crashed on me, and I didn't feel like I could live another second in that hell… "too much… I could transform in my cell… become a dog. Dementors can't see, you know…" I swallowed, feeling how chalky my throat was getting from talking… and thinking about them again.

"They feel their way towards people by feeding off of their emotions…" I tried to explain. "They could tell that my feelings were less- less human, less complex when I was a dog… but they thought, of course, that I was losing my mind like everyone else in there, so it didn't trouble them. But I was weak, very weak, and I had no hope of driving them away from me without a wand…"

It had gone on for a decade like that. It had felt longer than that, it had been lifetimes. I thought about the moment it all changed, when I glanced down at that paper.

"But then I saw Peter in that picture… I realized he was at Hogwarts with Harry… perfectly poised to act, if one hint reached his ears that the Dark Side was gathering strength again, ready to strike at the moment he could be sure of allies… and to deliver the last Potter to them. If he gave them Harry, who'd dare say he betrayed Lord Voldemort? He'd be welcomed back with honors…."

I shivered, thinking about the outcome. I had to protect Harry, it didn't matter what else happened. If I destroyed Peter, then he could never harm Harry. Like I had let Peter do to Lily and James. I couldn't make the same mistake twice.

"So you see, I had to do something. I was the only one who knew Peter was still alive…

Harry surprised me, speaking up. "The guards say he's been talking in his sleep… always the same words… he's at Hogwarts…"

I looked to my Godson to explain.

"It was as if someone had lit a fire in my head, and the Dementors couldn't destroy it… it wasn't a happy feeling… it was an obsession… but it gave me strength, it cleared my mind. So, one night when they opened my door to bring food, I slipped past them as a dog… it's so much harder for them to sense animal emotions that they were confused… I was thin, very thin… thin enough to slip through the bars… I swam as a dog back to mainland…. I journeyed north and slipped into Hogwarts ground as a dog. I've been living in the forest ever since, except when I came to watch the Quidditch, of course. You fly as well as your father did, Harry…"

I glanced at Harry now, almost too nervous too but I had to. What awe I felt the first time I saw Harry flying, so proud of him as he and his team moved onward. I was so pleased just to be able to see him. As for Harry… Harry didn't look away from me.

"Believe me," I implored. My voice threatened to give out. I loved him, I couldn't stand that he believed Peter's lies. If he hated me, couldn't he hate me for what I had done? I just didn't want him to think that I hadn't loved his parents and him more than anything. "Believe me, Harry. I never betrayed James and Lily. I would have died before I betrayed them."

Suddenly… all of the pain, all of the suffering… it lightened, just a bit… as Harry nodded to me. He… he believed me!

"No!" Peter shrieked, dropping to the floor. His death warrant was signed.

"Sirius- it's me… it's Peter… your friend… you wouldn't…"

He dare… I kicked as hard as I could.

"There's enough filth on my robes, without you touching them," I spat. Then he tried with Remus, such a sad creature he was.

"Remus! You don't believe this — wouldn't Sirius have told you they'd changed the plan?"

"Not if he thought I was the spy, Peter," Remus said heavily, and I hung my head. "I assume that's why you didn't tell me, Sirius?

"Forgive me, Remus," I asked ashamed. I should have seen it all… Remus had just been so distant. It all seemed like I had it figured out, then, but really… I'd been nothing but a fool.

"Not at all, Padfoot, old friend," Remus said, and I felt a real smile touch my face again. "And will you, in turn, forgive me for believing you were the spy?"

"Of course," I said, a grin stretching my face unfamiliarly. A dark glee filled me, then. I hadn't lost everything. "Shall we kill him together?"

"Yes, I think so," Remus was certainly less enthused. But, it was perfect, really. They would finish the worm that killed their family, who broke the trust they'd all built as boys together. How else should it end, after all these years? In this very place… where it all began for them.

"You wouldn't… you won't… Ron… haven't I been a good friend… a good pet? You won't let them kill me, Ron, will you… you're on my side, aren't you?"

"I let you sleep in my bed!"

"Kind boy… kind master… You won't let them do it… I was your rat… I was a good pet…"

He crawled towards the boy, pleading for his life as his pet. Disgusting. He couldn't even be a man long enough to die. I rounded him, sneering.

"If you made a better rat than a human, it's not much to boast about, Peter," I snapped at him. I was getting bored with his end of days nonsense. Peter should just man up and take his fate, not try the girl next. Besides, it didn't really matter what any of them thought I was going to kill him either way.

"Harry… Harry… you look just like your father…"

Peter's words stopped registering as a new kind of hot, incurable rage poured over me, like oil pouring.

"How dare you speak to Harry? How dare you face him? How dare you talk about James in front of him?" I shouted, shaking.

I lunged forward, grabbing one of Peter's shoulders as Remus took the other, yanking him away from my beloved Godson. If he wasn't going to die before, he certainly was for having the gall to speak to Harry!

"You sold Lily and James to Voldemort," I said, raising an unsteady wand as the moment was finally upon me. "Do you deny it?"

Peter cried and my lip raised in disgust.

"Sirius, Sirius, what could I have done? The Dark Lord… you have no idea… he has weapons you can't imagine… I was scared, Sirius, I was never brave like you and Remus and James. I never meant it to happen… He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named forced me-"

That was too much for me to take. I wanted the damn truth!

"Don't lie!" I screamed, feeling it burn in my raw throat. "You'd been passing information to him for a year before Lily and James died! You were his spy!"

"He-He was taking over everywhere!" Peter gasped. "Wh-What was there to be gained by refusing him?"

"What was there to be gained by fighting the most evil wizard who has ever existed?" I asked coldly, my blood boiling. Even I didn't understand Peter so well as to expect such a defense. "Only innocent lives, Peter!"

"You don't understand!" Peter wailed. "He would have killed me, Sirius!"

I snapped again, how dare he hold his worthless life over theirs? Over James and Lily's as if that was a decent excuse!

"Then you should have died! Died rather than betray your friends, as we would have done for you!"

Remus stepped up and I lined up with me, staring down in disgust.

"You should have realized," Remus muttered, quiet as he was. "If Voldemort didn't kill you, we would. Goodbye Peter."

Then, just as I was about to reach the moment I'd spent all this time searching for, to avenge James and Lily, to save Harry… Harry jumped in front of him.

"No!" my Godson yelled, and I looked staggered. "You can't kill him, you can't."

I just didn't know what to say to the boy. Didn't Harry understand? They'd wasted all this blasted time trying to help him understand!

"Harry, this piece of vermin is the reason you have no parent," I snarled, glancing behind at Peter sniffling. To see hope in his beady eyes almost unhinged me enough to shove Harry out of the way. "The cringing bit of filth would have seen you die too, without turning a hair. You heard him. His own stinking skin meant more to him than your whole family."

Didn't he see why I had to end him? After all this, couldn't Harry just understand?

"I know," Harry panted. "We'll take him up to the castle. We'll hand him over to the Dementors… He can go to Azkaban.. But don't kill him."

"Harry! You — thank you — it's more than I deserve — thank you —"

If Harry wasn't standing between them… I almost uttered the curse, as rage pooled thickly again. But Harry showed Peter away.

"Get off me. I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing it because — I don't reckon my dad would've wanted them to become killers — just for you."

I looked at Remus, unsure what to do with that declaration… I… couldn't pull my head together enough. I couldn't understand Harry's altruism and I honestly couldn't tell anyone what James' would have thought, even if… once long ago, it would have been as easy as my own thoughts.

After a moment, Remus started to look less unsure and they silently agreed to let it stand with Harry. As long as he wasn't a threat to my Godson, then… then I had to respect what the boy wanted. It had been his parents, he who was forced to grow up only knowing them through stories or photo's.

They lowered their wands. The fight was won.

"You're the only person who has the right to decide, Harry," I said softly. "But think… think what he did…" I implored, because while I would respect my Godson's decision… I did not agree.

"He can go to Azkaban…" Harry said firmly. "If anyone deserves that place, he does…"

"Very well, Harry," Remus spoke, finally. "Stand aside, Harry."

I frowned as Harry hesitated. It was a fair thought but Harry didn't understand how much we both loved him. That we wouldn't break his trust, or lie to him.. That broke my heart, that he didn't know that sort of respect. Remus reassured him and I deflated. Exhaustion took hold now that it was over… as Remus leaned in, though, I needed reconfirmation.

"But if you transform, Peter," I warned, deadly. "We will kill you. You agree, Harry?" I asked the boy. Harry nodded and that was good enough for me. Remus tidied up everyone else and I kept my eye on the rat. I didn't trust him not to do something like the first time. Never again…

"And two of us should be chained to this," I nudged him with the very edge of my boot. "Just to make sure."

I wasn't taking any chances. Never again. I cast a spell for the manacles and chained the three together.

There. That was good enough, it should hold him, then I could follow from behind and blast him to hell if he even thought of doing someting stupid. I waited for that wonderful kneazle before moving along with the rest.