"They won't let me through," Tobias murmured. He dragged his hand over his face, pushed his fingers through his hair. His spirit was threatening to leave him. He had to make sure he hadn't vanished yet. "Ami, they won't let me through."

He was standing in the great hall, standing beside Amarinda, and looking at the guarded doors.

Afternoon sun warmed the room, but it couldn't warm the ice in Tobias's ribs. There were people in need, and Jaron ordered him to stay put.

Ordered him to stay out of the way.

Amarinda reached for his hand, "They'll open the doors soon, I know they will."

"I need to be distracted."

"Would you like to tell me a story?"

"No, no, I need you to ask me questions," Tobias squeezed Amarinda's hand. "I suppose it works out because I have something important to tell you."

"And I am here to listen, my lord."

Where to begin, where to begin?

This was the first quiet moment they'd had together since market day. It was too much time, even if it had been less than three days. Words had been bottling up in Tobias ever since he'd been attacked by King Oberson's men. Bubbling and bubbling.

Threatening to spill over.

It was time to tell the truth.

Time to confess that he'd had the chance to see Mireldis Thay's face, but he chose not to. He'd been asked not to. While Mireldis was lying in her puddle of misery, he turned the other cheek and let Renlyn take the reins. He'd let Jolly pick Mireldis up like a sleeping child and carry her out of the Vaults.

He was ready to tell the story.

"I've, ah, I've been busy lately," Tobias mumbled. "It's been a long summer."

A tiny smile crossed Amarinda's face. She nodded. "I can't believe I didn't recognize Graer Thay. You can't really forget a man that big."

"Beards change people."

"I suppose you're right," she mused. "What wondrous tale do you have for me today, Tobias?"

"I wouldn't call it wondrous," Tobias rubbed the bump on the back of his head, remembering the way his skull crashed into his attacker's nose. "I'd call it. . . Terrifying. But I did what I could. I tried to do what was right, and I'm beginning to wonder if it was worth it in the end."

He thought of Ayvar, freed from prison, only to be held against her will. She'd let Oberson's men past her. Let them go after Mireldis so she could save him.

That was one part he didn't tell anyone.

It would mean certain death for all of those men. Queen Danika would call both him and Amarinda to Bymar and question them. She'd see to it that justice was found.

Was it wrong that Tobias didn't want justice?

Wrong that Tobias only wanted to get past those guards at the doors, and tend to the fallen?

There was too much hatred in the air. It smelled of blood and burned flesh. It tasted of bile and fear. Tobias would willingly sacrifice what he was owed if it meant moving on. He'd do anything he could to bring back happy smiles and tight embraces.

"Tell me what happened, love," Amarinda turned to face hin, cupping his cheek with her hand. "You know I'll listen."

"I-," Tobias began, his gaze locked on the doors, anticipating the moment they'd open. "King Oberson was right about Mireldis Thay wearing a brand on her hand. Ayvar- she, ah, she was the one who thought of the false sling. I'm so sorry I didn't say anything sooner, Amarinda, but I was struggling with it. I hid Mireldis beneath the table of herbs. I mean, I didn't do the hiding because I didn't want to lie, but Jolly did. Jolly stuffed her beneath the table.

"I just- I couldn't let her stay there, Amarinda. The brand they gave her reaches up her arm. It scalded the flesh bad enough she vomited and passed out. The infection that would've come if she hadn't received treatment is hard to survive. I asked them not to let me look, I've heard about Feall's tale, and I don't think it's fair to serve justice without Mireldis's full, honest testimony. That means a story given freely, not under the threat of fear. There, that's what I needed to get off of my chest. I feel better now."

Amarinda blinked.

So many words in so little time. They'd been building up for so ong, and now they were free.

Breathing became a little bit easier; Tobias pressed a hand to his heart in a vain attempt to slow it down.

He couldn't look away from the doors. One of the guards had shifted. His hand, which had once been resting on his halberd, was resting on the door handle. Any second now, those doors would open, and Tobias would be free to fulfill his calling. He'd be free to tend to those who'd fallen to the blade.

"Tobias," Amarinda said slowly, her voice low and even. "Did you let Mireldis go?"

"I had nothing to do with that, I promise. I don't know the full story, but I just know Jolly had something to do with it. I think she was trying to escape. I think she wanted to get out of the city before Oberson did."

"You chose not to see her face."

"I- I know it looks bad, but-"

"No, I'm proud of you. It would've been hard to ignore her. To look away while you let her friends clean her up. It's much nobler than smashing your head into a guard's nose," a smirk replaced her smile. "I overheard you all talking amongst yourselves last night."

With a chuckle, Tobias brushed the tender spot at the back of his head, "I'll have to give it to Roden, if he does that to every opponent he meets, he must have a very hard he-"

The doors creaked open, and Tobias was ready. He gripped Amarinda's hand with one of his own, and held onto his medical bag with the other. All he knew was that he had to get there in time. There had to be somebody still alive and in need of Tobias's skills.

"Slow down, Tobias!" Amarinda called, but she continued to race after him, her skirts gathered in her hand.

Normally, he'd listen. He'd recognize the dangers that came with sprinting over cobblestones.

But this wasn't about himself.

It was about life and death, and an unfair fight.

Roden and the other soldiers were marching back to the castle in straight lines. Oberson's men were in the middle of them all, their heads hanging down in shame. Better to be placed in another man's care than to bleed out in the street. Tobias didn't wait to exchange casual greetings.

The fight happened just outside the Dragon's Keep according to the pages who'd prepared Mystic for Jaron. Almost there, almost there. Tobias and Amarinda raced past quiet buildings. He ignored the way his lungs were burning. The way his side grew a stitch. He'd have to remember to run this fast this long more often.

Almost there.

"Tobias! Wait!" Amarinda came to a screeching halt, preventing Tobias from going any further.

He almost tripped on his own feet at the corpse before him.

The young man couldn't have been older than sixteen. His uniform was handmade, a black tunic barely held together by other scraps of fabric. Gloves covered his hands. The mask he and the other Faola wore had been discardeds. Tossed to the side in a last attempt to breathe. In a desperate attempt to survive the gaping wound in his chest.

His eyes were brown. His nose was a little large. Somebody was expecting him. Somebody had to be expecting him.

"Oh," Tobias grunted. He stepped back, almost bumping into Amarinda as he tried to keep his boots out of the boy's blood. "We can- he could- maybe-"

Amarinda gripped his upper arm, "He's dead, Tobias. There's no coming back from a wound like that."

He finally took a moment to look around himself.

There were more handmade leather masks thrown around. Some were meant to cover the eyes, others were meant to cover the mouth. Each one that lingered on the cobblestones was covered in either their owner's blood, or somebody else's.

They'd never be used again.

A little ways away from the fallen Faola boy lay one of Oberson's soldiers. Somebody left a dagger embedded in his back. It was driven through layers of fabric and chainmail, put there with the intention to kill.

Did the soldier know that when he came to Carthya, he'd never see Dinwallis or any other part of Bymar again?

Had he understood the risks when he agreed to accompany Oberson across mountains and swamps?

Tobias rubbed his eyes, "We have to get to work, there's somebody here that's still alive."

But the longer he stood, the more he realized just how unlikely his statement was.

The Faola followed Oberson into Drylliad. They'd followed Mireldis Thay, or at least that's what Tobias had been led to believe. It was entirely possible that the Faola and Mireldis's arrival had been a coincidence.

The Saints only knew what really had happened.

Ignoring another fallen Faola, this one a girl who'd taken a blow to the face, Tobias waded further and further into the battleground. Blood from both the attackers and the defenders mixed in puddles and streams between the cobblestones. In death, everyone was the same. They were all gone, Bymarian soldier or ragtag bandit.

Tobias pressed his fingers to throat after throat, searching for just one pulse. Amarinda lingered behind, and he was glad. He didn't want her to see him fail at the one thing he cared for.

Fixing other people.

Helping the unfortunate regardless of what side of the battle they fought on.

His hope was beginning to falter. He checked for a pulse on one of Oberson's soldiers; the third body Tobias knelt beside.

No heartbeat, only a glassy expression staring up to where the Saints resided. Tobias inhaled, and set a hand over the man's eyes, lowering his lids for him. It was a small final favor for a man following orders.

He couldn't give up. He wouldn't give up. Even after he'd found no pulse on the fifth victim, Tobias would keep going. He'd check the sixth, the tenth, the fifteenth if he had to. Trying to save one of the fallen was the least he could do.

Feeling no heartbeat became so common, Tobias almost didn't recognize the fluttering heartbeat of a young man dressed in black. Tobias tore off the young man's mask. "Amarinda! Amarinda, I found one!"

Tobiasa cut through the young man's dark tunic, looking for the source of his wound. A blow to the torso would be difficult to fix, but not impossible.

A large gash in the man's side was still bleeding.

"Ask him his name, try to get him to wake up," Tobias ordered.

Amarinda often spoke to patients with a calming lullaby ringing in her words, but not now. She was using her ambassador's voice, demanding that the young man answer her. It took several urges, but a groan escaped his lips.

Better than nothing.

Tobias reached into his back for a bottle of alcohol, tore the cork off with his teeth, and splashed it onto a cloth. He wiped away the blood on the man's side. That was powerful enough to wake him up.

It was easier to ignore the fact that Tobias caused all of this.

He'd caused this pain.

All because he'd believed that even one life cut down was too much. It was too high of a price.

But now Mireldis Thay was gone. She'd used Tobias's kindness against him and escaped, leaving a trail of bodies behind her.

He had to save the young Faola.

He had to atone for the mistake he'd made.

Hours passed.

He'd tried sleeping with the covers on and with them off, but it was never quite right. Amarinda was curled up on her side, snoring softly. Tobias held as still as he could, not waiting to wake her with the twisted musings of a sleepless mind.

The morning sky turned pale pink. Light wouldn't come for several more hours. Tobias crept out of his bed, and dressed as quietly as he could. He wouldn't be able to calm down enough to go back to sleep, and there was no use in trying to fight that.

Remembering some forgotten lesson about sneaking around from Jaron, Tobias waited to put his boots on until he was out in the hallway, keeping them wrapped up in his cloak. Amarinda didn't stir in her sleep.

So many thoughts.

So many things that happened. He was exhausted, but what was a few more hours of activity? There were imported teas from the west that could keep him awake. Other tasks to keep him from drifting off to sleep. He'd do what he had to.

Tobias pulled at the collar of his tunic, clasped his cloak around him, and slipped down the corridor.

Nobody was awake, save for the occasional guard keeping an eye out for the vanished Mireldis Thay.

She'd managed to flee, and Tobias was to blame for it.

He wasn't sure where he was going to go, but he couldn't stay in the castle for one more minute.

The courtyard was almost as empty. However, a familiar silhouette sat on the bottom of the stairs leading up to the castle doors.

"Can't sleep?" Tobias asked, sitting beside Roden.

He shook his head, "No, I've, uh, I have a lot to think about."

A bundle rested on his lap, consisting of a scarlet cloak wrapped around several objects. Roden's eyes bore shadows. He'd been frowning.

"Me too."

"You go fist?"

"I suppose," said Tobias. He set his hands on his knees, "I, ah, I went down to the square where the Faola fought off King Oberson's men. Tried to find somebody I could save. I wanted to at least try, Roden. I passed person after person, each one dead. There was one boy with a pulse I almost missed. Patched him up best I could, but I don't know if he'll survive. What about you?"

Roden scoffed, "My situation isn't nearly as bad."

"It's still worth listening to."

"Went to the Dragon's Keep to check in on Merry," Roden scratched the back of his neck. "The fight happened so close to her, I thought something- something bad might've happened. Found her drunk on the floor. We fought, said regretful things, and turns out she's leaving for Mendenwal today. Plus, the last I saw her, she was covered in stew and yelling, I don't want to remember that."

"Is the cloak for her?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because I wished somebody had been there for me after I fought with Jaron to remind me that I had a choice," he explained. Roden pulled aside the top of the red cloak, revealing several pieces of wrapped food and a carved charm. "I might not be her friend, but she's mine."

Tobias held up the charm, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be, I've always been bad at reading people."

The morning air was a little chillier than the previous morning. Tobias rubbed his hands together. The cloak he wore didn't do much to keep him warm. He must've grabbed one of the flashier ones. By the Saints, did that mean he was wearing an orange shirt too?

Never get dressed in the dark.

He set the charm back down, and stood. If Merry was leaving, so was Jolly. They couldn't have gotten far if they'd left the city. Tobias sauntered down the last few steps, and tucked his dark hair behind his ears. If Roden wanted to see the girl who'd yelled at him one last time, then Tobias would go with him.

It would help him think about other things.

It would take his mind off of whether or not that Faola boy would survive under the watchful care of the royal physician.

"Come on, where Merry is, we'll find Jolly sitting and playing the lute. We'll be able to hear him," said Tobias, gesturing for Roden to stand up. "The more time we sit here is more time for them to get away."

"You're right, as always," Roden grunted. He pushed himself to his feet, the red cloak tucked under his arm. "Thank you, Tobias."

"I should be thanking you," he countered. A witty retort crossed his mind, but he stashed it away for another day.

A pale blue haze settled in over the city, masking the early summer morning frogs and slugs fighting for dominance of the cobblestones. Tobias winced when a snail shell crunched beneath his shoe.

Couldn't he do anything right?

Yes he could! Be happy Tobias! Life is good for you!

But it didn't feel good. Not right now. Not the morning after a fight between cloth armored bandits and armor armed soldiers.

"Did we ever find out the cause of the fight?" Tobias wrapped his cloak around himself. "Why the Faola allegedly attacked Oberson's men."

Roden shook his head, "Mireldis Thay has the answer wherever she is. I think that Oberson's men chased her, and the Faola jumped in. She was one of their own at one point."

The buildings they passed looked almost cozy. Families were tucked in their rooms on the top floors. Fires would be simmering, waiting to be put out before the sun heated the air. They'd go on with their little lives without batting an eye at the street outside the Dragon's Keep.

And he envied them.

He wanted to know the secret to going about your life without fretting over every squashed snail and every paper cut.

How? How would he ever stop thinking about the fight between the Faola and Oberson's men if he couldn't even save one of them?

Quiet notes from a plucked lute swam through the air, twining together in a series of minor strings.

Merry curses my noble name

Claiming I don't do sh-

"Hey! Give that-!" Jolly's voice lowered to a whisper, too far away to be heard.

A wagon stood outside the Dragon's Keep, pulled by a gold Bymarian war horse. Jolly's feet hung over the wagon's side. He was reaching for his lute, which Merry held a safe distance away. Her back was to Tobias and Roden

"Help me load your junk first, and then you can sing," she said. "The sooner we leave the better."

Tobias went to clear his throat, but Jolly sat straight up in the cart. He waved, "We're getting a going away party?"

"We couldn't let our meddlesome troubadour leave us without telling him how much trouble he's caused," Tobias grinned. He walked forward, aware of the fact that Roden had frozen in his tracks. "Are you coming back soon, Jolly?"

He waved his hand, "We'll see. Merry hates it here and she's my driver. Give it a few months and I'll be back with a new ballad and a party to crash."

A breeze lifted Tobias's cloak ever so slightly. Tendrils of mist curled around alley entrances. Summer was dying, and so was the whirlwind adventure Tobias had been thrown into. He suddenly realized that he very much didn't want Jolly to leave.

It meant that there would soon be something else to worry about than bloody ballads and half drawn truths.

"I remember Roden's first jousting match like it was yesterday," Jolly wiped a false tear away from his eye. "Standing in for old sir Nyrsate. I'd never been more proud to call somebody my friend."

"You jousted? And you didn't tell me?" Tobias looked back to Roden in shock, he'd watched that match, fully believing it was Nyrsate that won. Not Roden.

"It didn't come up," Roden crossed his arms. He still hadn't moved.

Merry's face had gone pink. She was loading wooden crates into the cart with an inhuman speed.

Jolly had to have noticed. He probably knew the full story of everything going on, but kept it hidden with a wide smile and a brightly colored jacket. "Merry, Merry. Stop, let me help. Sometimes she insists on letting me be the damsel in distress, I really don't mind it, actually. Less work for me. Are you my knight, Merry? Or are you the dragon keeping me safe?"

"I'm the witch who cursed you to sleep forever," Merry retorted. She reached for Jolly's hand, and pulled him out of the cart. "Kidding, Jay, I'll be your knight."

"Catch me then!"

Without warning, Jolly fell backwards. Tobias moved to catch him, as did Roden, but Merry proved her worth as Jolly's fairytale knight, and managed to catch him before he hit the ground.

"I knew it, you're my hero," Jolly held a hand to his forehead as if he were going to faint.

She shoved him off, "I want to get to Mendenwal before the week is-"

"Tobias! I have something I need to say to you," he said. Jolly pointed a finger at Merry's face. "It's a secret, so don't bother trying to figure it out because I'm just going to tell it to you in a few hours."

Roden was already looking at him. Tobias tried to shrug as he let Jolly lead him away, he'd never seen Roden's eyes widen with that much fear.

Jolly was forcing the two of them to talk.

"Do you actually have something to say or are you just bullying them?" Tobias asked once he and Jolly were out of earshot near an alley.

"Both, I suppose," Jolly straightened his blue shirt collar. "I don't regret it, leaving the two of them behind. Merry needs to learn what it's like to still have an ally even after she's made a mistake."

"I'm curious, how did you meet her?"

"Are we going to bring up questions of the past or discuss the future?"

Only fools would try to predict Jolly. Tobias crossed his arms. "I'd like both, actually."

"I met Merry years ago, thought she was a corpse," his performer's smile shrank. The smile was meant for himself. "And years later, we're still terrorizing innocent festivals together."

"I have a feeling that's not the only thing you do."

The smile vanished completely. Jolly stood at his full height, his arms crossed. "You earned it. And you're technically Bymarian royalty."

"Earned what?"

"Information. Playing the lute is only one of my hobbies. Did you know that I can play the viol, as well? I can play the fippler, too, and the Bymarian pipes. Flutes. I can do flutes, too. Did you know that a sturdy flute can help you in a fight?"

Tobias tilted his head, "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying I've used a flute in a fight against a sword before," Jolly said. "You ask what else I do? I relay information to Queen Danika. Nobody suspects a troubadour with a pretty friend and a taste for ale."

"And Merry?"

"She, ah, tags along for the sights and the adventure. The pretty boys, too. Merry has no penchant for waiting on royalty anymore."

"You mean she did at one point?"

"I only tell another's story through song, not conversation. Everyone deserves their privacy."

He stole a glance over his shoulder to check on Roden. Merry was standing with her arms crossed a safe distance away. On the other hand, Roden was closer than before. He was gesturing to himself.

Everyone deserves their privacy. That's what Jolly claimed.

But at what cost?

"Why did you come here in the first place?" Tobias asked.

Jolly waved his pointer finger back and forth, "Past questions don't help. I came for a festival, but I stayed to find Mireldis Thay. And after that, I stayed for Merry. People like her and I don't grow roots, but we tricked ourselves into thinking things were different. We will go to Bymar to run through flower fields and forget what happened here, but we leave for Bymar soon. Queen Danika will learn about the treachery of lesser kings and lesser men."

"What happened here was my-"

"Don't say it was your fault, Lord Branch. Too many people think they control another's choices. Everyone thinks for themselves. You can't control the actions of another."

The streets had been cleaned in the night. The corpses from the previous afternoon had been carted away, and thrown into a mass grave. It was the actions of other people that brought bloodshed to the streets.

Tobias looked back to Roden and Merry again; he was holding out the bundled red cloak.

"Be careful, Jolly," said Tobias. He reached out to shake hands, "There's far too few smiles around here."

"Take care. Not enough people show compassion the way you do," Jolly grabbed Tobias's arm, and pulled him into an embrace. His voice dropped, "Thank you for saving Mireldis. For keeping her hidden."

"Don't ever ask me to lie like that again."

"I wouldn't dream of it."

He walked to Roden, unsure of why his heart felt so heavy.

Something was ending, and despite the aching it brought, Tobias was sad to see it go.

"I'll see you again, Mucky face," Roden shoved the red cloak forward.

"I'm not ever coming back," insisted Merry. She took the bundle, and bowed her head when she saw Tobias. "Lord Branch, thank you for your kindness."

"May the road rise to greet you, and the rain stay out of your face," he said.

She turned around and set the cloak on the cart. "Goodbye Cabbage Curls."

Tobias swallowed. He was witnessing something that didn't belong to him. It wasn't his right to stand so close to Roden. To stand so close to Merry as she hid her sniffles with a cough. He clapped Roden's shoulder, and took a few steps away.

"Say what you want, but I will see you again," Roden promised. "We're not that different."

Merry's voice cracked. "Are you going to chase me down? Trap me in a pretty cage?"

"No. I'll push you forward, like I'm doing now. When you come back, it won't be because of a festival or Jolly. It'll be because you chose to."

"It's dangerous to give choices as gifts."

"I'm not afraid."

Suddenly, the ground became very interesting. Tobias kicked at a loose stone. He'd look when he was welcome.

He heard the last of the crates thud into place. Roden was watching, and Tobias did the same. Jolly strummed at his lute. Merry clicked the reins. The cart rolled into motion.

"That was brave of you," Tobias said. "Still speaking to her after what she said."

Roden held the medallion he wore in his fist, the first few rays of sunlight glinting off of a carved fish. He kept quiet, and nodded his thanks.

Jolly's clear voice accompanied them as they walked back to the castle, a final parting gift.

A new ballad.

Once there was a princess,

Her eye made of thunder and her hair made o'night

She fell into a well, too deep to escape

Forever lost from sight

Her brother came to save her

Gave a poisoned gift

But I didn't weep, instead threw rope over well walls

I dragged her out myself

She cried for a day and chose the dark way

All I did was watch

An eerie end to a lover's tale, but there were worse stories.

Tobias rubbed his nose with his sleeve. He'd get no conversation out of Roden.

They'd all come so far, and lost so much.

He wondered. Wondered about future chances.

Wondered if they'd ever have the chance at catching Mireldis Thay.

But when all was said and done, did it really matter?

Until they knew the whole story, Tobias wasn't sure of an answer.

He'd keep going until he found the truth.