A/N:
A lot of you are pissed at Bella, and I get that, but it's all part of the story. She (and Edward!) will redeem themselves in upcoming chapters.
This isn't a story where everything happens at once. It's more of a slow burn, so don't abandon the ship just yet ;-)
Title: Love is Strange
Author: MarieCarro
Beta: Alice's White Rabbit
Pre-reader: LunaEclipse
Genre: Friendship/Romance/Drama
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Bella Swan and Edward Cullen live in the small town ofLigonier in Pennsylvania. They've been best friends since they were six years old, and not much can keep them apart. Bella wants to leave small-town life behind, while Edward is fine with whatever, but that's not the only complication in their relationship. What happens when they fall in love … with each other?
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
CHAPTER 16
NEW YORK, NEW YORK
Eight months later
"Welcome, everyone. It is an honor to be back here at MICA where I studied for three years, and the very program that made this exhibit possible. Their traveling fellowship gives young, aspiring artists such as myself an opportunity to explore ourselves as artists and find our voice within the world of art.
"For my project, I decided to explore a subject derived from my own experience, love, and how your feelings for someone can reflect how you look at the world around you. However, we already see this in media. In movies, in magazines, in wedding and family photos. Engagement photoshoots in almost magical environments.
"Therefore, I wanted contrast to be the focus of my approach. Throughout this exhibit, you will see different representations of love, whether it's obsessive, aggressive, all encompassing, or absolute. You will notice how the negative representations are set in conventional or awestriking locations while the sort of love we raise to the sky have darker, more deprived backgrounds.
"Does the setting affect how we see the subject? I hope you'll enjoy my photos, and my artistic view. Thank you."
Bella gave the microphone to Professor Alistair, who gave her a look of pride, and then she made a beeline toward her dad, Esme, and Carlisle.
Charlie gave her a sideways hug and kissed the top of her head. "You'll have to slow down, Bells. I don't think this much pride can be healthy at my age," he said.
"Why don't you ask Carlisle," Bella replied with a grin.
Carlisle smiled widely and took the opportunity to tease Charlie a little bit. "Oh, you know, cut back some on all that red meat you're eating, and the pride won't harm you." As Charlie grumbled, Carlisle winked at him.
Esme embraced Bella with all the motherly love she could muster. "This is fantastic, Bella. The photos are absolutely stunning."
"Thank you. Hopefully, they'll open the eyes of New York's magazine elite. Or, at least, open the door to a job. Waiting tables will only get me so far, and that apartment isn't cheap." When Esme's eyes lit up with worry, Bella hurried to reassure her. "I'm still endlessly grateful you helped me find it. I mean that."
After Alice had graduated from Parsons the year before, she had been presented the opportunity to continue her studies in Paris and Milan, and she moved out of the apartment she shared with a girl in the very northern part of Manhattan. Since then, the girl, Irina Lucas, had been very unlucky in finding a new roommate.
When Bella announced, upon her return to America, that she wanted to try New York, Esme had immediately contacted Alice for Irina's number to see if she still needed a roommate. To Bella's astonishment, she did, and after a conversation over Skype, Irina said she'd gladly share the apartment with her.
Still, despite them sharing every cost in the apartment, Bella would still have to borrow money from her dad until she could find work that paid more than the two waitress positions she'd already , she planned on working freelance as well, but she realistically knew that wouldn't pay much until her name became recognized.
Carlisle cleared his throat, which gained him Esme's and Bella's attention, but when he gave Esme a pointed look, Bella felt momentarily confused. Esme let out a heavy sigh, and then looked back at Bella.
"Could we talk? Just the two of us?"
"Of course," Bella replied, still confused, and she was also starting to feel a little bit scared. What could possibly cause Esme such apprehension?
The two of them walked away from the crowds, and Esme grabbed a hold of Bella's hands in both of hers. Bella's heart started to beat faster as her fear increased. Her first thought was that something terrible had happened to Edward while she was out of the country since Carlisle was also in on the know. Had he been in an accident? Had he been hurt?
"Sweetie, this might not be something you feel that you need to know, but I think you should." Esme's voice was calm, so it couldn't have been something too bad.
"Okay."
"When you returned to America, you didn't contact Edward—"
Bella interrupted quickly. "Because I can't keep sending him mixed signals. Last time we spoke, I told him we needed to move on. For both our sakes."
Esme nodded, as she already knew this. "Yes, and while I'll always wish in my heart that you will find your way back to each other, I have to tell you how he handled it." She sighed again. "He didn't. I think it truly sank in that you were serious when you told him goodbye, and he … broke."
"Broke?" Bella's eyes welled with tears for the boy who had been such a huge part of her life for most of it.
"For lack of a better word, yes," Esme said. "He stopped going to classes and even refused to leave his apartment. Up until a few of weeks ago, he was practically catatonic."
A lump too large for her throat formed, and Bella repeatedly tried to swallow it down. "So what happened a few of weeks ago?"
Esme's jaw clenched in what was clearly disapproval. "He started seeing a girl named Maria. She's a history major at Harvard."
While Bella's heart clenched uncomfortably and her abdomen churned with ugly jealousy she had no right to feel, she didn't understand why Esme disliked that her son was finally moving on and rebuilding his life. That was what was supposed to happen.
"Isn't that a good thing?" she asked, doing her best to force the tremble out of her voice. She hated that a part of her had irrationally hoped Edward would never move on. That he would "wait" for her, as stupid as that actually was. It was, albeit, a very small part, and she pushed it out of the way in order to at least try to feel happy for him.
"Under normal circumstances, yes," Esme agreed. "The problem is that he doesn't actually want to be with her. He's projecting his lingering feelings for you onto her, and they're moving a little bit too fast for a healthy relationship."
The discomfort was steadily rising in Bella. She didn't really want to continue this particular conversation. A hint of nausea rose in the back of her throat.
Why was she feeling such negative emotions toward the fact that Edward was moving on? She'd told him to do so on multiple occasions, yet she didn't want to accept it now.
"In what way?"
"They're already living together."
"Oh." It was the only response she could come up with.
Esme waited for her to say something else, but she was coming up empty. Luckily, someone intercepted the conversation and gave Bella the opportunity to think of something else.
"Excuse me, Ms. Swan. Can I have a word with you?" A middle-aged woman with a tight knot and an impressive bosom and stature stood behind her, and Bella smiled.
"Absolutely," she said. "Excuse me, Esme. I'll find you later."
Esme nodded silently; her eyes lit up with sadness, and maybe some disappointment, as if she'd hoped Bella would instantly call Edward up and profess her love.
The woman held out her hand for Bella to shake. "Ms. Swan, my name is Francine Dalton. I'm the managing editor of The Metropolitan Chronicle in New York. I heard you have plans to move there."
Bella couldn't believe her luck and had to stop her jaw from dropping. "Yes. I already have an apartment actually. I'm moving there next week."
"That's perfect. We're always in need of local freelance photographers, and I would love to have you in for an interview. Your work is very impressive for your age. What do you say about Friday next week?"
The grin on Bella's face couldn't be stopped. "I'd say I look forward to it."
"Great. Bring your portfolio with you, and here's my email address. We can coordinate a time that suits you."
"Thank you." They shook hands again and Ms. Dalton left to look at the rest of the exhibit.
Bella held the business card against her chest and did her best to hold in her excitement. Things were finally looking up for her. She was going to New York and start her adult life there.
She had officially gotten out of Ligonier.
~~LiS~~
2 ½ years later
Bella dramatically jumped up on the desk, effectively startling the journalist tapping away on the keyboard in front of him.
"Fucking hell!" he exclaimed and glared at her. "Be glad you didn't make me accidentally delete all my work," he grumbled, but Bella knew he wasn't really mad at her. He rarely was.
"Oh, lighten up, Em! I'm here to save your butt." She held out a small piece of paper to him with a name and number on it.
Emmett McCarty, investigative journalist at The Metropolitan Chronicle and Bella's best friend extraordinaire, shot up from his seat and took the piece of paper from her outstretched hand. "Is this?"
"You bet your ass it is. And it wasn't easy to fix, so I'm expecting you'll buy the drinks for the next six months and name your first child after me," she said as Emmett wrapped his long, almost terrifyingly muscular arms, around her small frame.
"Done and done," he agreed. "Although, I'll have to ask Rosie about the name."
Bella laughed. "When she hears I was the one who fixed Michael Bublé to sing a special song as you propose, I'm hoping she'll at least consider me as a middle name."
"If she has her way, she'll boast out your name on the five o'clock news."
"If she does that, we're even." Bella winked, and Emmett sat back down in his seat to continue on his article. When Bella didn't leave, he looked back up at her questioningly.
"Yes?"
"Before I came to you, I was in Ms. Dalton's office." She smiled widely but didn't continue.
"And?" Emmett didn't understand what Bella was getting at. The girl had been a freelance photographer for the newspaper for over two years, and she often went to Ms. Dalton's office, so that wasn't exactly out of the norm.
"And you're looking at the paper's newest junior photographer," she announced and threw her arms out while doing jazz hands.
"For real? Belly, that's awesome! Welcome to the team!"
She bowed as if she were the star of a Broadway play. "Thank you." When she straightened back up, she and Emmett high-fived.
When Bella first moved to New York, though used to mostly having male friends growing up, Emmett's boisterous and outgoing personality had intimidated her on their first assignment together.
He was writing an editorial on a young man who had been charged and convicted for murdering his girlfriend and sent to jail for life. But after four years, new evidence had shown he was innocent.
Emmett had joked carelessly with the man, and Bella had felt almost embarrassed by her colleague for being so tactless with the man who had essentially lost four years of his life. What she didn't realize was Emmett was brilliant at reading people, and the one thing that innocent man had needed at that point was to be treated as anyone else and feel truly free. Emmett gave that to him when he joked about his time behind bars.
It took months for Bella to fully level with Emmett, but when she did, he quickly became the big brother she had wished for as a kid but soon realized he could also be a huge pain in the ass.
Emmett was in a serious relationship with the star news anchor of channel 7, Rosalie Hale. Together, the two of them had taken Bella under their wings and made it their mission to make a real New Yorker out of her.
Bella sighed happily and stole Emmett's chair to spin around. "Goodbye waiting tables for pay that's not worth it and shitty tips," she said. "With the raise I'm getting, I'll be able to focus on photography full-time."
"How much will you get?" he asked and looked around the desk-filled room to make sure no one was watching as he brought out a hidden flask and spiked their coffees so they could toast in celebration.
"Sixty bucks an hour. Ms. Dalton classifies me as a semi-professional nowadays. Obviously, it's not full-time, but the best part is that I don't need it to make ends meet, and I'll still be able to start paying Dad back for everything he's lent me the last couple of years."
They clinked their mugs together, and Bella's face scrunched up involuntarily at the strong alcoholic flavor of the whiskey in her coffee. Emmett had poured a generous amount.
"This weekend, we're all going out," Emmett announced and left no room for argument. "We have too much to celebrate to not do it, and I allowed you to bow out of the bar hopping I planned for your birthday two weeks ago. You're not getting out of it this time," he said, pointing at her and attempting a serious face.
She held up her hands in surrender. "Fine, I'll go. I know Rosalie will want to tell me everything about your proposal anyway and show off her new rock."
Suddenly, Emmett became almost timid. "So you think she'll say yes?"
Bella grimaced incredulously. "Uhh, yeah! I'm genuinely surprised she hasn't proposed to you yet." Her phone started to ring in her pocket, and she excused herself to answer it.
The display said it was Esme calling.
They were still close. Not as close as they once were—an inevitability, considering how far apart they were living—but they still kept contact occasionally.
"Esme, hi!" she greeted. "How are you? How's Carlisle?"
"I'm well, sweetie, and Carlisle's well, too. How's everything with you?" she replied politely.
"Everything's great. I was actually officially hired at the paper today. Just before you called. So I don't have to work at the restaurants anymore," Bella said, and her excitement could be heard in her voice.
"Oh, Bella, how wonderful! I'm so happy for you," Esme gushed, but then she lowered her voice and mumbled something Bella didn't fully catch. The tone of her voice didn't sound very positive though.
Bella had to ask. "Is something wrong?"
"Well," Esme started reluctantly. "I hate giving you news like this on a day you should be celebrating, but I thought you needed to know."
Immediately, Bella understood Esme had called to give her an update on Edward. There had been no direct contact between her and Edward for over three years because she absolutely refused to insert herself in his current relationship with Maria, whom he was still going steady with.
Naturally, since she talked with his parents, she extended well wishes to him through them, and he reciprocated, but that was all there was now. Just polite friendliness without any lingering animosity.
Bella knew, in her heart, that she would always hold love for Edward deep inside. He was her first love, her first serious boyfriend, and they had shared many milestones together. There were still days when she thought of him and her heart started racing. But she had, essentially, moved on and so had he.
She had gone on a few casual dates and had forced a couple of hook-ups once she started to get used to New York. She had convinced herself that she needed to put herself out there, but she soon realized that she wasn't interested in finding a new relationship or that she even needed it.
As long as she had her friends and her job as a photographer, she was content and happy.
"Okay, what is it?" she asked softly now and waited for the bomb she was sure Esme would drop. Her updates were rarely small things.
"They're engaged, sweetie. They're going to get married next summer."
Words failed her.
What could she possibly say after that? There was nothing that could possibly describe how she felt toward this news. It was almost as if her body stopped functioning because everything went silent. She felt empty and emotionless.
She had scarred her heart quite badly after everything she put herself and Edward through during their college years, and she knew she didn't really have anyone else to blame but herself. The two deepest scars had appeared when she had ended their "friends with benefits" agreement and when she miscarried.
Now, those scars got the company of a third.
It was now official. She had lost Edward Cullen forever, and she wasn't certain how to deal with that realization.
A/N:
Some of you might hate me now, and that's fine, but don't worry, this is NOT and will NOT become a cheating fic, but it is time for our main couple to start growing up!
Until next time,
Stay Awesome!
PS. I hope my updates give you some joy during this global shitshow! My thoughts are with each and everyone of you, and I hope we can all get through this in whatever way we can!