A/N Thanks so much you guys! Wow, so, an afternoon of picnicking and fishing has turned into so much more. We're right where we left off as we see how the day plays out. I hope you enjoy!
00
Daryl's on his feet and rushing to the SUV. He yanks open the rear passenger door and hurries back to her, "C'mon Beth, we gotta go. Take my hand."
She's taking short fast breaths and he can see she's in a lot of pain. He's doing his best to act calm but the fact is, he's not calm at all. He's worried and scared. It doesn't seem like the beginning of labor to him, at least not what they've been told to expect. The most worrisome of all is, he knows it's not time for labor period.
He gets her in the backseat and helps with the seatbelt, "Try'n lay back a little. If it's too uncomfortable take the damn thing off. I'ma be drivin' real careful anyway. I'm just gonna try'n get ya ta the hospital as quick as I can." He starts to close the door, stops himself and tells her, "I love ya girl." Just before it slams shut.
He realizes he doesn't have his crutches and he knows he's going to need them. He quickly hobbles back over to the blanket, grabs them and tosses them in the hatchback. He rips the Velcro loose on the boot and throws it in the back too. He's sure he won't be able to drive with that thing on. His mind flashes on Frankie's car, damn he wishes he had that right now.
Her voice is strained and broken when she asks, "Daryl what are you doing?"
"I'm'a get ya ta the hospital."
He's already in the driver's seat, the engine's fired up and the car's in drive. They're on their way when she protests, "Daryl, no! You can't drive with your leg."
"I can and I am. Don't worry bout me, just try'n relax. Breathe."
He snatches the phone from his pocket and makes a quick call to Merle, "Yeah brother listen, I'm takin' Beth ta the hospital, yeah, yeah, be quiet and listen now. I don't think we got much time, it seems like she's ready. Yeah, yeah, lemme finish. Anyway, her and me we been up at the river fishin', you remember that old spot where we used ta take Sophia? Yeah, that one. Anyway, there was no time and I left all our shit there. Will ya run get it? Yeah, thanks brother, I appreciate it. Yeah, we're goin' straight ta the hospital, not county though. It's too far and I don't think there's time. I'm headed ta the closest one, St. John's."
She's so scared and she heard what her husband told his brother, she knows he's scared too. Nothing seems right at all. She's read all the books and talked to her doctor and she's taken the childbirth classes, and no, this just isn't right. It's not supposed to be like this, everything's happening too quickly. Oh my and Daryl, what about Daryl? He shouldn't be driving. Oh my gosh.
This dirt road is in much better shape than the one that leads to the lake, but it's still not smooth and he knows the rough road is making this tougher on her. All he can do is say to her over and over, "I'm sorry girl, I'm try'n ta miss the ruts. Just hang on, we'll be on the main road real soon. Hang on Beth, just hang on."
He feels like his own gut is all twisted up. He can't take knowing she's in pain and he's so scared something's gone wrong. If anything bad ever happened to her he couldn't take it. If anything happened to their baby they'd both be wrecked.
He's relieved when they finally hit pavement, but he's sure she's ten times more relieved. "Okay Beth, that's better, huh? Just hang on, we'll be there in twenty minutes."
At first he tried driving with his right leg but the minute he pressed down on the brake and a sharp pain shot through him, he knew it was a mistake. Since that first wrong move, even though he's been managing to drive with his left foot, his right leg is feeling the pain of not having the cast. It's awkward and difficult but he can manage. And besides, it's not nearly as tough as what his wife is going through. He almost laughs as he thinks of the one bright spot, it's not a stick shift or he'd really be screwed.
He tells himself everything will be okay soon. She'll be safe at the hospital with doctors and nurses who know what they're doing. They'll take good care of her and their baby. As for him, he'll put the boot back on and the leg will feel just fine. Maybe. But whatever, once he knows for sure that his wife and his baby are doing okay he can call his own doc and see about the leg.
That's where his mind's at when she screams from the back seat, "Daryl! Daryl! NOW! Pull over! Hurry! Hurry!"
He can tell by the panic in her voice this is no time to question her. He pushes a button on the dash and the hazard lights come on as he pulls the car over to the side of the highway. He throws open his door and hobbles as quickly as he can to the passenger door in the back.
He tells himself to take a deep breath, they talked about this in childbirth classes and he knows what to do, he just never thought he'd ever have to.
He throws her door open, pops her seatbelt and instructs, "Lay down Beth, lay on your back. Here, lemme help ya."
"Daryl, Daryl…"
Her voice seems so weak and that adds to his worry, but he's determined not to let her know he's just as scared as she is. He tries to act like he knows what the fuck he's talking about when he tells her, "Don't worry, we got this Beth. We both know what to do. Just keep up the breathin' and the pantin', it will help everythin go a lot easier for you and the baby. It's all gonna be just fine." And Dear God he hopes that's true.
Who can account for the way a mind works when a person is operating on a mix of panic combined with survival mode? For him there's something he suddenly remembers, she always keeps a little package of sanitizing wipes in the console between the front seats. He reaches a hand over, pops it open and gets the package, cleaning his hands and up to his elbows. It doesn't seem like enough, he wishes there were somewhere to wash up, but it's the best he can do in the moment.
He hasn't got a towel or a blanket, nothing to wrap the baby in. He'll have to use what he can. He takes the phone from his t-shirt pocket, lays it on the floorboard, and reaching his hands behind his back he pulls his t-shirt up and off. It'll have to do.
Tears are rolling from her eyes and her knees are up as she pushes. He's still trying to sound like he knows what he's doing when he tells her, "Try'n slow down just a little on the pushin', just keep breathin'. I'm right here with ya, I love ya and like I told ya, we got this." In the meantime he's hitting 9-1-1 on his phone, laying it on the floorboard again, and then pulling her panties down.
That's when he knows for sure, he'll be delivering their baby. He can see its time. The 9-1-1 operator is on the line and all he can do is yell down at the phone giving her their location as best he can, "We're just passed mile marker 34 headin' east, a red SUV. I can't talk no more, baby's comin'."
He softly rubs her abdomen with an open palm, and then as the baby's head becomes visible he places the hand on the baby's head to give support, and to keep the little one from simply popping out. He attempts to sound as cool as he can when he reminds her yet again, "Ya gotta pant now, ya don't wanna tear yourself. That's right girl, you're doin' just right, just keep pantin'."
He places both hands over the infant's head as best he can, waiting for baby to make the next move. He remembers to resist pulling the child out, to just let the baby and the labor contractions do the work. He simply let's his hands guide their baby.
It's happening. There's a mess of all type of fluids he can't quite identify, and it seems like there's more blood than there ought to be. He tries to just ignore all that, their baby is coming. He tells his wife, "Okay, next pain just go on and push. Baby's ready and so am I. It's okay Beth, everything's good."
No sooner are the words out of his mouth than his wife is shrieking in pain and the tiny human makes her appearance.
She's so small it's alarming, he's sure she can't be more than about three and a half pounds. She looks blue and she's wrinkled. She's also wet and slippery and he uses his t-shirt to hold her. She's so little she almost fits in one hand.
He's made a lot of noise over the months about this being his baby and all, but there have been times when secretly he wondered. Could he really feel that way when the baby arrived? Would he really be able to look at the little one and say, "this is my child," and mean it, feel it? Now he knows the answer. As soon as he held the little girl in his hands he knew there would never be another doubt. She's his daughter.
He gently strokes downward on the baby's nose and the mucus and what must be amniotic fluid come out. He turns her over so that her tummy now rests in his palm while he rubs her little back and whispers over and over, "C'mon Annie take a breath for Daddy, c'mon baby take a breath for Daddy."
When the child makes a faint noise he's hopeful, but there's no breathing and no crying. They had to learn how to do resuscitation in some Red Cross course Georgia Power made everyone take, and they learned how to do it on infants in childbirth class. All he knows is he needs to try.
He's just puffing a breath of air into the baby girl's mouth when he hears the sirens, and an ambulance and sheriff's car pull in behind the SUV. He's holding his daughter tightly against his bare chest as he looks up to the heavens and thanks God.
Before he knows quite what to think the paramedics have taken over. The umbilical cord is clamped and cut and one of them rushes his new baby to the truck, while two others bring a gurney and begin to move Beth from the SUV.
He's about to yell at them, tell them to be careful with his family, when there's a hand on his shoulder and Rick's voice is saying, "You're not driving. You can ride to the hospital in the squad with me."
His leg is throbbing so he doesn't put up much of an argument, still he questions, "What about Beth's car?"
Rick shakes his head, says, "No problem," and put's some kind of yellow card under the wiper. "Give me your keys, Merle and I can bring it by the hospital later."
The paramedics tell him, "We've got them both on oxygen and your wife on an IV to get some fluid in her. That's all we're going to do here, we're taking them to St. John's now. They're expecting us and they'll be ready."
He wants to tell them wait, that he needs to talk to his wife. He needs to hold her hand, he needs to look in her eyes and know for himself she's all right, and he wants to give her just one kiss. He needs to hold his baby girl close for just another minute.
He doesn't say or do any of that though. That would be selfish and this isn't the time to be thinking about himself. For right now he's only thinking about the fact his whole life is riding in the back of that ambulance.
He grabs the crutches and boot from the back of her car. He never thought he'd be anxious to put the son of a bitch on, but now he knows how much he needs that boot. He feels like his head is in a fog but he just keeps doing what he has to do, putting one foot in front of the other as he quickly walks to the squad. Just as he's about to open the door it all catches up to him, he bends over and throws up on the side of the road.
Rick nods as Daryl slides in the car the sheriff commiserates, "It's the fuckin' nerves. It gets to a man when he sees his family in trouble. It's going to be okay though Daryl. Beth and the baby are in good hands."
All he can do is nod and be grateful that yes, Rick's right. Beth and the baby are okay for now. He's both thankful and relieved when Rick hits the lights and siren, and their following the ambulance the short distance to St. John's.
One thing him and Merle have in common is their tough guy cocky attitude, the one where they puff up their chests and tell the world they're not afraid of anything. But he knows that's all just so much bullshit, right now he's scared to death.
They pull into the ambulance entrance and with Rick by his side no one questions whether he belongs there or not, although he sees the way they're all staring and he's about to ask what the fuck they think they're looking at. Then he thinks about what he must look like. He's wearing the boot, he's on crutches and he's not wearing a shirt. Not only is he half-naked, but he's well aware how messed up he looks.
No matter how many times Beth tells him it's not ugly, he's seen what his skin looks like. His chest, his shoulders and neck, his back and his arms are all covered in not only plenty of nasty scars, but all kinds of different scars. Lash marks, knife wounds, burned mottled flesh on his chest and shoulders, and the fern like red scarring on his arm and side. Then there are the cheap tattoos and whatever that sticky baby juice is that's all over his chest.
A male nurse hands him something neatly folded, "Here man, you can put this on, there's a restroom just up the hall." He nods his thanks as he hurries to the bathroom, washes his hands and face and does the best he can to get the baby juice off his chest with a handful of wet paper towels. He slips the scrub shirt on and he's back with her.
The scene feels so chaotic and that's unnerving, yet he's glad to see everyone rushing to help his family. Rick gets a little assertive with the doc on duty who lets him know they're taking the baby girl to the NICU, and after the initial exam Beth will most likely be taken to the maternity floor.
Daryl asks, "What about her regular Doc, Dr. Carson."
The doctor smiles when he tells him, "I'm the other Dr. Carson, his brother. I'll put in a call and tell my brother you're all here, I know he'll be right over."
The doctor can see the man is a wreck and lays a hand on his upper arm as he assures him, "Listen Dad, you did a great job of bringing that little girl into the world, under what were certainly not favorable conditions. Now it's time for you to try and relax and let our team take over. We've got a terrific group in our NICU to care for your daughter, including the best Pediatric Doctor in the region, Dr. Subramanian, everyone calls him Dr. S."
He nods, okay yeah that's right. It doesn't matter how badly he wants to fix everything, he knows he can't. He's got to let these people do what they know how to do.
Finally they let him sit with his wife. She looks exhausted and seems even smaller than usual, and her skin is so pale. Yet she has a smile on her face when she says, "We have a baby girl Daryl." Then her eyebrows crease and she asks, "You're not disappointed it isn't a boy are you?"
He carries on like it's all just great, like their baby didn't come too soon and like Annie's not too small, and like she didn't have trouble drawing her first breath. He smiles, shakes his head and says, "Nah, nah you kiddin' me? I got me another fishin' buddy and I can already tell she's gonna be a good one."
"You need to go to her Daryl. We can't leave her alone."
He's torn. She's right, how can they leave their new baby all alone? Even if these people are all professionals and they all know just what the hell they're doing, they're still not family. There's another problem though, how can he leave his wife? He doesn't want her to be alone either, "But what about you Beth, I don't wanna leave you by yourself either."
She smiles at him and even though her eyes look so tired they also look happy and in them he sees the angel that she is. She assures him, "I'll be fine Daryl. I'm getting very good care and besides, I know you'll be right here in the hospital and I know you're coming back to me. Annie's too little to know you'll never leave her."
He does his best to smile and agrees, "You're right, I'm never far from you and you're always in my heart, her too."
"And Daryl, just so you know, you're my hero. I was so scared and you were so calm and you knew just what to do. Just listening to you and knowing you were there to take care of me made me feel more calm. Then you brought our daughter into the world. I'll never forget the precious moment when I heard you ask her, 'C'mon Annie take a breath for Daddy' and I knew then you loved her."
"Course I love her Beth, she's my girl. Like I said, she's my fishin' buddy and she's my little fighter too, you'll see. She'll come through this like a champ." Then he actually laughs a little when he admits, "And just so ya know, I was never calm. I ain't ever been more nervous or more afraid, and as soon as you and Annie were in the ambulance I threw my guts up right there on the side a the road."
She giggles and tells him, "Well you're also a great actor. I don't know how I got so lucky to wind up here with you. All I know is I'm going to thank God every day that I did." He kisses her forehead and she tells him, "Dr. Carson will be here any minute, as soon as he examines me and says I can, the nurse promised she'll bring me to the NICU. I'll see you and Annie there."
Just before a nurse escorts him to the NICU his phone vibrates. Shit, it's Merle and that reminds him, he didn't even call his brother yet. He apologizes, "Sorry man, so much happened so fast, shit Merle, I had ta deliver my baby girl myself, right there on the highway."
They talk a few more minutes as he fills his brother in and then he thinks about something he needs to say, "Hey man, I know I called on ya a lot these past few months. Ya got rid a that trouble Beth had and got her money back. Ya took care a her when I was out and ya took care a things for me today. I want ya ta know brother, I appreciate all that ya do."
Merle's not any better at taking a compliment than he is, he simply answers, "I told ya, it's my job brother."
Rick's right there and he takes the phone long enough for him and Merle to make arrangements to meet on the highway and get Beth's car. Merle can't help joking with the sheriff, "Sounds like I'll be takin' it ta the car wash."
Daryl's oblivious to his brother's joking. He smiles as the sheriff hands his phone back and he says to him, "When all this is over and we get back home I'ma have ta have you and your family over for a steak dinner Rick."
Rick just smiles back and says, "That sounds like my kind of reward. You just let me know when."
As they're walking to the NICU the nurse explains to him what the rules will be, "Here at St. John's we believe babies need to spend as much time with their parents as possible. We're not going to restrict you except to encourage you to go home at night and get sleep. If you were to get sick we wouldn't be able to let you see your baby at all."
He doesn't argue with the nurse, he agrees. He needs to stay healthy to take care of Beth and the baby. He has to get all the sleep he can while he can. He does keep his plan about where he'll sleep to himself, but he already knows as long as Beth is in this hospital he'll be sleeping here too, with her.
They get to the nurse's station and there's a woman there who tells him, "I just need to get a few details from you Mr. Dixon. I've got birth records to complete. I promise it'll only take a moment."
He knows these things are important but he's anxious, "Yeah, okay, sure, I just wanna see my little girl."
"I know, I'll make it quick." The woman asks for his full name, Beth's full name, their birth dates and Mother's maiden names, and then she asks, "Do you know your daughter's time of birth?"
"Yeah, I looked down at my phone, it was 1:52 this afternoon."
"Perfect, and your daughter's full name?"
"Annette Louise Dixon."
The woman smiles, "Oh I love that, it's so traditional."
He's not sure what he's supposed to say, he just shrugs and tells her, "Yeah my wife's mother was named Annette. We're gonna call our little girl Annie."
"How sweet."
The nurse meets with him and explains his options, "Although the baby will be in an incubator to keep her warm, if you decide to, when you're with her you can be the one to keep her warm. It's called Kangaroo Care and it's a method we believe in here at St. John's. Skin to skin contact is important with newborns. We'll place her on your bare chest and cover her with a light blanket. All you have to do is hold her close and share the warmth of your body with her. If you'd prefer not to do that, you can sit next to the incubator and there's a portal where you can reach your hand in and touch her."
He doesn't have to think about it, but he does tell the nurse, "Yeah, I wanna hold her as much as I can, it's just when I delivered her I got a lotta that fluid stuff on my chest. I should probably wash up again."
She nods and leads him to a scrub sink, points out the soap and the foot pedals to control the water, hangs a gown on a hook and tells him, "When you're done washing just put this on with the opening in the front."
She pulls the curtain to give him some privacy and he gets busy washing, puts on the gown and he's so ready to see his baby. It feels like forever.
He finally gets to sit in the rocking chair and he watches intently as the nurse lifts his baby girl from the incubator and puts her in his arms. His heart feels so full as he looks down at the little girl laying on his chest. The little one who has already changed his life completely.
She has some kind of monitor stuck to her tummy and a little tube leading from her nose, but none of it looks too scary. What strikes him again is, she's so tiny it's like holding a doll in his arms. Her skin is pink now and she doesn't really have what you'd call hair, it's more of a white fuzz. It's all such a contrast to his darker scarred and tattooed skin.
People always say their kid looks just like this person or that person, he has no fucking idea who his daughter looks like. It's way too soon to know, but as he glides his finger softly along her tiny cheek he whispers, "You're a little beauty Annie, ya look just like your Mama."
The nurse checks on him and the baby periodically and the third time she comes by she lets him know, "They're going to bring your wife up soon and Dr. S is going to be in right after that to tell you all about Annie's checkup."
It's about an hour and a half later when the big double doors open and a nurse wheels Beth into the room. She looks tired and frail, but she's smiling from ear to ear. Annie's nurse helps Beth open her gown a little, enough that the baby can lay on the bare skin of her chest.
All Daryl can do is look at his wife with their baby girl nestled against her. He can't speak, he's afraid if he does he might cry. He's so filled with emotion he's worried that once he starts crying he'll never be able to stop. All he does right now is stare at the two most important people in the world to him and think what a lucky son of a bitch he turned out to be.
00
A/N Annie has arrived on the scene - and what an entrance she made! I hope you enjoyed it and that you'll leave me a comment. The chapter photo is on my tumblr blogs gneebee and bethylmethbrick, please check that out. I'll be back next Friday with more of Love On The Line and I hope to see you here. Until then stay safe and well and remember, I love ya large! xo gneebee