SIXTEEN

When we got to Jessie's house a few minutes later, she let go of me, walked a few steps toward her door, and turned around. After tugging a little on both of her gloves, she brushed herself off, adjusted her belt, straightened her hair, and spread her arms out wide. She stood there in front of me, bouncing on her toes.

"C'mon, Cloud!" she grinned. "What're you waiting for?"

I stared at her. "Wha…?"

Jessie laughed. "Gimme a hug, one that's good and tight. Make me feel alive! How 'bout it?"

"I'm not the affectionate type," I said.

"You've done it before," she reminded me. "Remember?"

"Only because you did it first," I pointed out. "You haven't been shy about it, either."

Jessie let her arms drop to her sides. "So that's all it was?"

I sighed. "That's not what I meant…"

"It's alright," she turned around, her back to me. "Maybe it was too much, like I said back at the train station. I guess I do get carried away sometimes. It's just… I thought that, beneath that cool, tough guy shell you wear, that you liked the attention. But… I guess I was wrong. And I don't want to do anything that's unwelcome or unwanted. So, I… I'm sorry, Cloud. I really am…"

I gazed at her, my gut twisting itself into knots at the thought that I had hurt her. I hadn't wanted that, not at all. I'd never been good at this sort of thing, talking about my feelings and those of others. But I liked Jessie, maybe more than I wanted to admit. I liked having her close. I'd just never known how to tell her. But I realized I wanted her to know. I understood that now, clear as day.

"Jessica…" I said.

She slowly faced me again, looking up at me in wonder as I moved closer to her. My heart was pounding in my chest as I took hold of her with both hands, resting them lightly on her shoulders. Jessie looked as though a light breeze could've tipped her over. Swallowing hard, I tried to bring the feathers swirling around in my stomach under control as I gently pulled her close, wrapped my arms around her, and hugged her tight just like she'd wanted me to.

Jessie returned the favor, embracing me just as tightly, her head on my shoulder. We stood like that for a while, and I found I wasn't in any hurry to let go. Neither was she, I was sure. My heart kept racing as the endless moments went on, and I thought I could feel hers, too, beating every bit as fast as mine.

"Wow…" she breathed. "Thank you…"

I nodded. "Sure. And like I said, it… it's not that I don't like… what you do. It's just that I'm not used to it. It… it's not, uh… unwelcome. At all. Sorry if I made you think it was."

Jessie smiled up at me. "It's okay, Cloud. I'm so happy you feel that way. And I'm really glad you decided to stay with us. Just couldn't resist this little beauty, could you?"

"Apparently not," I smirked.

"Told ya! Anyway, why don't you come inside for a minute? There's something I want to give you."

A gift? I hadn't expected that. "What is it?"

Jessie giggled as she let go of me. "You'll see! C'mon! Oh, gotta find something to put my flower in, too."

She opened her door, and I followed her inside. After switching the light on, she rummaged through her little kitchen until she found a tall plastic cup with most of whatever image had been on it worn away. She filled it with some water from the sink, then took it into the living area and set it on top of the dresser. With a little smile, Jessie gently slid the flower out from where she'd tucked it behind her armor strap, brought it up to her nose, and smelled it for a minute before putting it carefully inside her makeshift vase.

"There!" Jessie said. "It's not some nice glass piece, but it'll do. You can't be picky down here in the slums. Gotta work with what you've got and make do with the rest. It's one of the things I've learned in my time down here. Lessons for living on the ground floor."

"Sounds like a book title," I said.

She laughed. "It does, doesn't it? Maybe I should write it sometime. But I promised my hero a gift, so…"

Pulling open the top drawer of her dresser, Jessie sorted through a collection of papers, scattered electronics parts, pens, pencils, assorted small tools, and what looked like miniature posters of some kind. They had an illustration on the front, but I couldn't make it out at first. Jessie took one out along with a pen and closed the drawer.

"What's that?" I asked.

"A surprise," she winked. "Still have a few of these left after all these years, not that very many people down here would recognize me now. I just like to think of them as mementos."

I didn't understand at first, but then I saw the picture on the poster when Jessie laid it flat on the table by the bed. It was a perfect replica of the LOVELESS poster I'd seen in Sector 8, complete with her picture in it the way she'd looked back then. It wasn't much bigger than a normal sheet of paper, but it had been printed on a coated, high-quality stock, probably for use as a flyer. Jessie signed it with a flourish.

She held it out to me with a smile. "Here you are! Promised you an autograph, remember?"

"Yeah," I took it. "Thanks, Jessie."

"No problem! Been a long time since I've given any of these babies away. Used to do it a lot when I was still acting."

I understood. "You miss it?"

"Yeah, sometimes," she admitted. "It was fun, you know? Made me into the bubbly, energetic girl I am today. But I like where I'm at now. It might not be as fancy as my old life, but it's just as full and just as good, if not better. I've got my friends, a good job, a good cause, a home, and a really cute guy to talk to. So I'm happy."

"Good," I said. Then I read her signature. "Jessie Jae?"

She nodded. "My stage name. Had to come up with one after I left Shinra, like I told you on the train."

"Right. Well, uh… glad things worked out for you."

"Thanks!" Jessie beamed.

Giving her a faint little smile in return, I started to make my way to the door. It was late now, well after midnight. Time to head back to the bar and get some sleep. But when I reached into my pocket on my way out, I couldn't find my spare key. I dug around, as far as I could go, but it wasn't there. Where was it? I'd had it on me earlier, I was sure. Where had it gone? Had I left it somewhere?

Jessie noticed my confusion. "Something wrong?"

"Can't find the extra key Tifa gave me," I explained. Then I checked the other pocket. No dice. "Damn. It's not there, either. Could've sworn it was. I always keep it with me."

"Did you leave it at the bar?" Jessie asked.

I shrugged. "Guess I might've. Have you got one?"

She shook her head. "Sorry, no. Never thought to ask Tifa if I could have a spare. Didn't think I'd need it."

"It's okay. The inn's still open, right?"

"Yeah, but it's always full by now unless you get a room early in the day. Not that I've ever stayed there myself, mind you. No need. But I've got friends who have, and I know a lot of people here. The owner's one of my customers, too. Remember?"

I did. "Yeah. Looks like that's out, then."

Jessie flashed me a grin. "You know, you could always curl up here tonight, Cloud. If you don't mind sleeping on the floor, that is. It might not be a big space, but it's cozy."

"Are… are you sure?" I stammered. "M-Maybe I oughta go back to Wedge's place and see if he has room…"

"Awww, you don't wanna stay with me?" she teased.

I swallowed. "It's not that. Just don't want to make things awkward. You're a, um… girl, you know."

Jessie laid a hand on my arm. "It'll be fine, Cloud."

"You sure?" I asked.

"Positive," she assured me. Then she winked and held up her index finger. "Just don't try any funny business or I'll kick your ass inside out and upside down, SOLDIER boy."

My eyes widened. "N-No, I'd never—!"

She laughed. "Relax, Cloud. I'm just messin' with ya."

"Oh…" I blinked. "Uh, right…"

"I know you'd never try to take advantage of me," Jessie gently took my hand, her voice quieter now. "Like I said in the reactor, I trust you. With my life. I never would have offered to let you stay here tonight if I didn't. I'm safe with you, Cloud. I know it."

I relaxed. "Thanks. And you are. Safe, I mean. With me."

She giggled. "A hero and a gentleman! I just love that combination in a guy. You're really quite a catch!"

"I am?" I wondered.

"Oh, yeah," Jessie said. "The best."

Then she gave my hand a gentle squeeze, went back to her dresser, took out a set of nightclothes, and went inside the bathroom to change. While she was in there, I leaned Buster against the wall, sat down, and took off my boots and gloves. I was just putting them next to my sword when Jessie came back out, her armor and other gear in her hands. She put everything on the table, then neatly folded her daytime clothes one at a time before stacking them up and putting her gear on top of them. Giving me a coy little smile, she placed her boots and gloves right next to mine, then went and plopped down on her bed.

"There's extra blankets and sheets in the closet," Jessie pointed to a set of shelves built into the wall next to her little kitchen. "Well, it's not exactly a closet, but you get the idea."

I went over, took the extra linens, and laid them down on the other side of the bed, the one across from her little kitchen area. Although it wasn't a large space, it was more than big enough for me. Out of habit, I started to reach for my shirt to take it off, then froze when I saw Jessie and remembered where I was.

"Oh, don't mind me," she smirked.

I let go of my shirt. "Nevermind. Wasn't thinking."

Jessie faked a pout. "Aw, you're no fun! Thought I was gonna have a good show tonight."

"Nope," I said. "Got a pillow?"

She grinned, whipping one right at me. "Catch!"

I did and set it in place. Then I laid down and watched as Jessie got up to switch off the lights. She was wearing pajama bottoms and a gray short-sleeved T-shirt with her long auburn hair hanging loose over her shoulders and down her back. My eyes drifted up almost on their own to her curves, which were much more defined and shapely without her armor. Tomboy or not, Jessie was still a beautiful woman, and the more I looked at her and spent time with her, the more I saw it.

After killing the lights, she slipped back into her bed, pulled up the blankets, and rolled over onto her side. She propped her head up using her hand and elbow and smiled down at me. I gazed up at her, not sure what to say, my breath somehow gone at the sight of her there. Though it was dark, my eyes adjusted to it quickly enough, and I could still see Jessie even in the gloom as she lay there above me.

"Need me to tuck you in?" she teased.

"Uh, no…" I pulled my own blankets up. "Not tonight."

Jessie chuckled, blew me a kiss, and rolled onto her back. "Another time, then. Nighty night!"

As I lay there, I called to her. "Jessie?"

"Hmm?" she said.

"Thanks," I told her. "For letting me stay here tonight."

Jessie turned back to look at me. "You're welcome, Cloud. I'd never leave you out in the cold."

"It's not cold outside," I blinked, confused.

"Figure of speech," she laughed, her eyes dancing. "Oh, you are just so adorable, you know that?"

I hadn't, actually. "Uh, okay… if you say so."

Jessie winked. "You bet I do! Anyway, sweet dreams!"

Still smiling, she rolled away again, and only minutes later, she was asleep, the sound of her breathing soft and regular. I turned on my side and just laid there for a while on my makeshift bed, listening to her as I thought about her and about all that had happened today. Eventually, I found myself drifting off into a troubled sleep.

Fire was everywhere.

I looked around, not sure at first where I was. Fear gripped my heart as I stood on a concrete floor choked with rubble and broken iron beams, twisted and scorched by some terrible explosion. As I stared at the flames burning all around the area, I realized there weren't any walls, only a few scattered columns supporting the blackened ceiling. I was high above the slums, and when I realized that, I knew where I was.

Near the top of the Sector 7 pillar.

It was then that I noticed the smoking, twisted wreckage of a Shinra chopper strewn all about one side of the area, fire still eating at what was left of its charred carcass. The rotors were bent and broken, jagged pieces of them lying on the floor nearby. As I drew closer to the ruined chopper, my heart nearly stopped and my eyes widened.

Half-buried by the debris was Jessie.

She lay on her side, covered inrubble, metal beams, pieces of brokenglass, and fragments of the chopper's hull. One of the rotorshad snapped off and had embedded itself into her lower back below the bottom edge of her armor, slicing all the way through her stomach, and shrapnel had cut her in a dozen places. A shard of it was buried in her right thigh. Shehad also been shot several times in the arm and shoulder. Blood pooled under her in a steadily widening puddle as she lay so still.

"Jessie!" I ran to her.

Her eyes fluttered open. "There you are… handsome. I knew… you'd show up. A little fall… wasn't gonna… do you in."

I threw rubble and debris off of her as fast as I could and tried not to think about how badly she was hurt. "Just hold on! I'm getting you outta here. You're gonna be alright!"

"No, Cloud… the curtain's… about to fall. But… seeing you again… one last time… makes it easier. Makes me… happy…"

"Like hell it's your last!" I insisted. "I won't let you die!"

Sorrow filled Jessie's eyes as I carefully pulled the rotor from her and picked her up in my arms. "It's okay, Cloud. It's okay. All the…things I've done… my bombs… mywork at Shinra… theytook… so many lives. It's time for me to reap… what I've sown…"

How could she say that? "No! It's not your fault!"

I carried her over to one of the nearby columns and set her down as gently as I could, cradling her in my arms as I sat there with her. She was burnt, bruised, bleeding, and covered with ash, dust,and dirt. Jessie held her abdomen with one hand, wincing in pain, but we both knew it would never be enough to staunch the flow of blood. It was leaking out of her as if it were coming from a faucet. And there was surely more flowing inside her, internal bleeding I couldn't stop, either.

Jessie must've been shot just as she threw a raspberry at the chopper, causing it to go off early. When it had exploded, it had thrown her to the floor as the flames had blazed across her skin.As wounded as she'd been, she hadn't been able to escape, and the helicopter had crashed right onto her, blowing apart and crushing her underneath its ruined bulk aspieces of it had flown into her body in the process.

"My hero…" Jessie smiled. "You kept… your promise."

I gazed at her. "I told you I'd come for you. AndI'm gonna save you, Jessie.So stay with me, alright?"

But I knew, deep down, that it wasn't possible. That she was dying. I hated it, hated even forming the words in my mind. I could feel her body starting to grow cool, though, the warmth slowly fading away and taking her life with it. And there was nothing I could do. I'd never felt so helpless before. I didn't… I didn'twant to lose her. If only I'd gotten here sooner. If only I'd been faster. But now it was too late.

Slowly and painfully, Jessielifted her wounded arm and touched my cheek. "I wish… I could. More than… anything…"

"Jessica…" I put my hand over hers.

"But I can't…" she murmured, her breathing getting shallower by the second. "As much as… I want to. Still… having you… here with me… at the end… makes it… a little easier. And I… I've gotta admit… there's no place… I'd rather die… than in your… loving arms."

My eyes were locked on hers. "I'm not gonna forget you."

Jessie smiled. "Looks like I get to play… the tragic heroine… one last time. But you… need to get going. Just be sure to… kick Shinra's ass… for me… okay? Raise some hell… up there…"

I nodded. "Count on it."

"Thank you… Cloud. It's… been fun… hasn't… it…?"

As Jessie whispered the last word, her voice trailed away into a long, soft breath. No more followed it. Her hand started to slide away from my face, but I held it there, not wanting to let it go. Not wanting to let hergo. I stared at her in shock and disbelief as her head drooped to one side and her eyes, those beautiful brown eyes, closed forever.

Jessie was dead.

"It was, Jessie," I murmured, answering her question even though she couldn't hear me anymore. "It was. You made it fun."

For a moment, I couldn't move. I just sat there with her, my eyes wet and closed as tears slid down my cheeks. She was gone. Her laughter, her smile, her touch… I'd never experience them again.Nothing mattered to me then but Jessie. I thought of all the timesthat we'd shared together, all the memories we'd built in the last two months.

Someof them were things we hadn't even done yet, not in the waking world, but I could remember them here as if we had. Not entirely, but in bits and pieces, images in my mind. I saw a fierce battle outside a Shinra warehouse, Jessie and I fighting side by side as we'd so often done before. Parachuting off the plate, Jessie strapped in front of me, her slender arms and legs stretched out to either sideas we floated to the slums. A kiss that made my heart fly higher than we were.

I saw us finish the Hardy and ride it through the slums, Jessie behind me, shouting in excitement, her hair free and loose as it flew behind her. Our picnic at the secret place. It was our first real date. Our second night together, complete with fireworks. We both got up to some funny business this time. With each other, if you know what I mean.

Jessie's breakdown inside the Sector 4 underplate. How I'd held her as she had cried, overcome with guilt about the deaths she'd caused with the Reactor 1 bombing and Shinra's misuse of her weapon designs. Charging back to the slums on the Hardy, fighting our way through the Corkscrew Tunnel the night before the Reactor 5 mission. The memories swept over me, and I didn't want to let her go. If I did, it would make the fact of her death real. Terribly, irrevocably real.

But I had to. I opened my eyes, gently set Jessie on the floor with her back against the column, and placed her hands together in front of her. I held them for a moment or two, then reluctantly let go. Before I stood up, I carefully untied her red headband and took it. I clenched my hand into a fist as I got to my feet, fury filling my blood.

"You can't save her," a cold, sinister voice taunted.

I knew exactly who it belonged to before I even turned around. "Like hell I can't! You don't know a damn thing!"

A long, flowing black cloak, a thing of hardened leather, buckles, and polished metal shoulder guards.Silver hair, hanging well past his hips. A pair of cold, pale green eyes with slitted pupils. Held in one gloved hand, a flawless, shining katana six feet long, resonating with every movement. My rage became a firestorm when I saw him standing there, a menacing figure amidst the blasted, burning ruins of the tower.

Sephiroth pointed at me. "Oh, but I do. You can save no one, Cloud. Not your mother, not your village, and not this girl. Her fate is sealed. As is yours. There is only one thing you can do."

"And what's that?" I demanded.

"Run away, Cloud. Live. Let the hate drive you. Let it be your guide, your compass. Live, and cling to it."

I snarled, drawing Buster in a single fluid motion, and charged right at him. Anger was all I knew as I swept my sword across, images of what he'd done to me flashing through my mind. Nibelheim in flames, burning in the night. My mom, buried in the broken debris of our house, a red slit of blood in her chest marking Sephiroth's brutality where he had run her through. The smoke, stinging my eyes then as it did now in the tower. All I wanted was to cut him down and destroy him.

But just as I was about to hit Sephiroth, he vanished, and Buster cut through nothing but air. His laughter echoed all around me as everything went dark and the pillar, Jessie's headband, and her body all faded away. Blackness was all that was left, and it was almost merciful next to what I had just experienced as I flew toward wakefulness.

My eyes snapped open. "Jessie!"

At first, I didn't have any idea where I was. The dream had been so strong that it took me a few moments to realize I was awake. But as my eyes adjusted to the gloom, I was able to see the familiar surroundings of Jessie's house. My heart was pounding with fear, loss, and anger, and my hand was still clenched into a fist. It wasn't until I heard Jessie's soft breathing from above me that I finally relaxed.

When I had calmed down, I stood up, needing to see her, to know she was really alright. I sat quietly on the edge of the bed and looked at her, memories of the dream filling my mind. How hurt she was. How I had watched her die. The pain my heart as I'd held her in my arms and had felt her slipping away. Jessie's death, her hand still on my cheek. I'd have given anything to change that. It had been a dream, but it had also been so vivid, so real, as if I'd actually been there.

As much as I wanted to just dismiss it all as a nightmare, I couldn't. Sephiroth's words lingered in my mind. He had claimed that I wouldn't be able to save anyone. That Jessie was destined to die in the pillar. But he himself was dead, had been for years. Wasn't he? But then, why had he shown up in my dream like that? If he was alive, I was going to find him, sooner or later. I had to settle the score.

But I also didn't want to lose Jessie. And if there was any chance at all that what I'd seen in the dream might actually happen, I had to find a way to stop it. She lay on her side, sleeping peacefully, one hand next to her on the bed while the other was under her pillow. The top edge of her blanket had slid down a little below her shoulders during the night, so I reached over and carefully pulled it back up for her, tucking it into place so she'd be covered and stay warm.

She stirred a little. "Everything okay, Cloud?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "Just woke up for a minute, that's all. It happens. Nothing for you to worry about."

"You need anything?" Jessie yawned.

I shook my head, just glad to hear her voice. "No. I'm fine, thanks. Go back to sleep, Jessie. I'll watch over you."

She gazed fondly at me. "Keeping me safe and sound?"

"Always," I whispered, putting my hand over hers, the touch of her skin making mine tingle. "So get some rest."

"Sure thing," she smiled. "Guess I'll be your sleeping beauty."

My stomach fluttered as our fingers brushed up against each other. After giving my hand a gentle squeeze, Jessie pulled it closer to her and let her eyes slide closed. Neither of us let go as she lay there, and before long, she had fallen asleep again. I held onto her for a while, needing to know she was alive, to feel it. And as I sat there and watched her sleep, I gently reached up with my other hand, pushed a few errant strands of hair from her face, and made a promise to us both.

"Jessie…" I murmured, knowing she couldn't hear me. "Guess it's a bit easier for me to say this now. Not sure I could if you were awake. It's just that… I'm not good at this sort of thing. But… I want to tell you… that I care about you. Took me a while to see it, but I do."

"One of the reasons I decided to stay, Jessie… it was you. Before we went on the Reactor 1 mission, you told me that you'd miss me if I left. What I've never told you is that… I would have missed you, too. When I first took on the job of protecting you, I thought I was just doing Tifa a favor. It was supposed to be just another job."

"She even offered to pay me for it," I continued. "Turned her down, though. Like I said, I was doing her a favor. I knew it would upset her if anything ever happened to you. That's all it was, Jessie. At least, at first. But then, somewhere along the line… keeping you safe, it… it became important to me. And… so did you."

I sighed and went on. "Tonight, I… dreamed that I lost you, Jessie. And it scared the hell outta me. I was there, I… I saw it all happen. You were in my arms when… when you died. It was so real, I could feel the weight of… of your body. The heat of the flames, the way the smoke in the air stung my eyes. Like I was really there."

"Jessie… I don't think it was just a nightmare. I don't know what it was. But what I saw… I can't ignore it. And if there's any chance that it might really happen, I'm gonna do everything I can to stop it. I'll find a way. I'll save you, Jessie. That's a promise."

When I was finished, I just gazed at her for a while, determined to change what I'd seen in the dream. It had been so real. The blazing heat of the fire, the acrid sting of the smoke in my eyes. The heavy weight of the rubble and debris I'd thrown off of Jessie's broken body. Her blood, wet on my gloves as I had carried her. Her fingers resting lightly on my cheek even as the life had left her.

I let my hand drift down to her own cheek, stroking it gently. I had to save her. I would save her. I wasn't sure how, but I knew there had to be a way. And I was going to find it, whatever it took. After a moment, I let go of her and sat on the floor with my back to the bed, thinking of the dream, and my hand clenched into a fist again.

I'll save you, Jessie. I promise.