First part of series: Obito, you dumb shit.
Follows canon to point of Rin's demise. Canon-divergent, introducting Obito's return to Konoha and the aftermath.
Obito-centric.
Platonish ObiRin, KakaObi.
Rated M for some adult themes.
Naruto doesn't belong to me.
Summary: Obito's birthday chapter.
Also, I'd love to thank everyone for positive feedback so far!
Snake isn't suprised when Obito comes to visit him. When he says he's done with stimulants, Orochimaru is even more curious. He invites Obito to sit down and let him draw few blood samples. Drawing blood is part of an agreement and Snake makes significant progress with his newest research.
"I trust you, Snake," golden eyes look at him. There's something unreadable in Orochimaru eyes.
"You're a fool, Obito. People don't trust me, because I'm always up to something, they say. Because my look and cunning mind freak them out."
"I'm freak of nature, too. I should've died years ago. You were inside Madara lair. You saw Zetsus. I'm first one to have Mokuton since Shodaime. For genius, Hound is insufferable smartass-" he pauses. He always talks too much.
Orochimaru prepares and labels the samples. He removes gloves and Obito has to sit for a minute and wait patiently. The blood drawing is their ritual and Orochimaru speaks, usually not talkative one.
"Commander spoke of you both in high regard after you got the Water Prince," Obito presses gauze harder. "You two make a nice duo. You remind me of my old ANBU team. Your sensei was one of us."
"Minato-sensei was an ANBU?" Snake gives him old photo as a proof. Five masked people. Minato is easy to recognize, by his golden hair. Kitsune. To his left, raven-haired man. Eagle. Man with long, dark hair. Snake. Next to him, white-haired man. Wolf. Sakumo? Obito stiffens when he sees last mask. Owl.
"For a couple of months."
"Who is this person to Kitsune left? Eagle?" shaved neck. His father had similiar haircut. But Otousan is dead. He never was an ANBU.
"An Uchiha. One of the best I ever worked with. He was outstanding in the field. Such a shame he was killed. When White Fang committed suicide, he couldn't stand people who blackmouthed him. He was on different mission. Eagle couldn't forgive himself to the end of his days. He died a nasty death, five years after. They even didn't get his dogtags."
"Not much left of him, I guess. Our instant suicide seals aren't designed to left much behind. Maybe that's better, not much leftovers for the scavengers. No matter how extraordinary you are, fated to be scrubbed off with kunai."
"He was your father."
"Don't bullcrap me, Snake," Obito glares at him. Yoritomo? An ANBU? The Clan, the Council would never allow it. "I'm not here to hear how noble my father was. Yoritomo Uchiha is a dead man. Suddenly, everyone seems to know him better than me. An ANBU Uchiha before me? Nonsense. I'm the only one."
"There's lot of things you don't know. Or refuse to believe."
"If this is photo of your ANBU team, why do you keep it? From all people in Konoha, Snake Sage has the photo. May I see it again?"
It's the only copy. Obito takes it in with his Sharingan, every single detail. He wants to ask so many things, he's out of the words and leaves very soon. He gets string instrument, maybe playing some music could help him get his thoughts in the order?
Even if his father is alive, would it change anything? Could they start anew and be on better terms? Father wouldn't like it, ANBU and Kakashi, excommunicated from the family. Right now Obito has become everything Yoritomo Uchiha despised.
His father was better off dead.
Such nonsense, really. Fear of disapproval from someone deceased over decade.
Madara is dead. Black Zetsu is gone. He defied them and made a peace of his mind.
He can feel his father reaching for him from the afterlife, the empty grave. His erection isn't here. What a mood killer. But today is his birthday.
Obito is alone today. Solitude isn't the worst, Obito is used to be on his own. The worst, Kakashi got mission on his birthday.
So Obito is playing the koto, his dick exposed and he's eating the takeout. He is wearing only bathroom robes and days old socks.
His hair are greasy and he's smelling bad.
Obito doesn't care. It's his fucking birthday. He can do whatever he wants, an ANBU lieutenant. He can sit in dirty clothes and touch his dick, pull the koto strings and play half forgotten nursery rhyme rhythm. His extended leave ends tomorrow.
Tomorrow he will go to the Hokage and report on Itachi and Shisui. He will give the Commander and Vice Commander some future members assessments.
In next week, he's going to be far away from home, on the mission.
His home is apartment shared with Hound. Cold blooded Kakashi. Friend Killer. His birthplace is occupied by the strangers, some ascending Uchiha Councilman family.
He feels faint tugging in his blind eye. Kakashi's chakra is pulling inside his mind, and Obito sees the battlefield very clearly. He knows that place. Rin died here. The monument of tangled branches, the white skeletons caught between them. They all died here, with Rin.
Hound electrocutes the enemy with the chain buried underneath, Obito lends him his chakra and the white wolf made from the lightning chakra tears through the enemy. Obito reaches deeper, pulling his Mokuton chakra through Hound body, channeling it into the soil, until it reaches his old Mokuton. Conducted chakra makes its way to the remaining Kumo ninjas.
Obito senses Mist swordsman nearby and he sends a warning through their bond.
"Happy birthday, love."
Love. Cold blooded Kakashi calls him love.
Come to think about it, Hound won't be promoted as long Owl lives. Why Owl handed him the promotion he doesn't deserve, for compromized mission and broken leg? Why not Hound, who is far better fitting for a promotion than him. It's because Owl is afraid of Hound. It's because this is only way to keep Raven in check and this way leads towards Hound.
They're connected for good and bad. They're used in non-healthy ways. They're soldiers. They're ANBU. They knew what they had signed for. There's no going back. Formal resignation won't be accepted.
They're trapped in much subtle trap than Madara's shiny moon genjutsu. They're bounded and chained to this world Madara sought to replace, who worked so hard to manipulate him into his plans. Rin's demise. Seal on his heart. He can't quit ANBU. He was so focused on hidding his Sharingan bond he forgot about Hound. He's trapped. His fingers stroke both dick and koto strings.
His dick is fake. Koto strings are real. Maybe he's really a woman? He lacks his manhood and he's too scarred and too ugly to be an eunuch. Maybe he should try and play eunuch's flute? His balls and penis are just weirdly shaped appendages with no real function. Useless. Fuck it.
There's chakra leaking through the balcony doors.
It's Cat chakra, flared up. If Cat made so far, the Otter's underling is good, she's very good. Or Hound arranged seals to let her through. That asshole. He had planned his birthday.
With a touch of chakra, Obito dismantled the traps, resting on the futon mattress. He played the string instrument, from time to time stroking his dick and eating take-out with his dirty hand. Cat stepped forward, immediately surrounded by protective wards once again. The flat was a mess, Raven was a slob.
"You should take a bath," Cat voice was loud.
"You smell bad."
Raven laughed loudly.
"Are you going to bribe me outside, you should try better."
"You were training without permission."
He went silent, concealing his dick and brushing an instrument aside. As she suspected, there was syringue inside. Was Obito taking drugs? With all his injures, it's no surprise he's taking some painkillers. Her lover, Hayate Gekkou is also chronically ill.
Cat wished him happy birthday and left to the kitchen, while Raven was busy putting himself together.
Uzuki Yuugao is one of those ANBU younglings who were secret Kakashi's admirers and fangirls. She isn't so young anymore, Obito remembers her hanging out with Rin and other girls. She's civilian, related to Uzushio survivors, scattered around the world.
Under the shower, Obito carefully puts weight on his bad leg. It's almost healed, coldness from his bone marrow is gone. Obito worked hard to keep broken bone in good shape, stimulated flow of chakra in the pathways. He used healing chakra seals to enhance injured muscles and tendons. Bad leg doesn't bother him anymore. Young ANBU in his home is real concern. Something isn't quite right; ANBU doesn't celebrate. They're just faceless shadows, hidden extension of Hokage will. Yuugao backmails him without a blink, seeing through something he wanted to hide with ease. He scowls. While the water is still running, he reaches for odourless shampoo belonging to Kakashi.
How did Hound ended getting close enough to give her an access to their flat? She's Rin old friend and there's something missing. What made ANBU youngling reach out to Hound, get past his wards? Terrible mission. Terrible mission gone horribly wrong. Obito reluctantly agrees to participate, hoping in getting more details of classified intel.
He applies handful of shampoo and while rinsing it, his eye burns. He cusses loudly.
"Are you okay?" voice behind the door asks and he's fine, just the fucking shampoo. Kakashi's odourless joke of shampoo is going to the wastebasket. He grabs the towel and wipes his face, searing feeling in his eye gone for a second. His scowl deepens at the reflection in the mirror: a red tattoo, leaking eye and muscular chest. He goes back into shower to wash off any soap and shampoo remains, then dries his hair without looking in the mirror. When he goes back to the kitchen, clad in bathing robes, hair still damp.
Tea and cakes.
Uzuki Yuugao presence doesn't make him feel uncomfortable. It's subtle, warm and cozy feeling. She's more interested with their shared lifespace than young Raven pacing around, preparing for leave. It's her first time inside. She kindly offers to braid his long hair, and Obito doesn't refuse.
"How did you happen to earn his trust in Snow?" he asks when she's just halfway done. It's unspoken, but her fingers doesn't stop, her chakra pattern weaves so slightly, and she's too close to Obito. He notices it immediately.
"We aren't allowed to discuss details with anyone not directly involved in the assigment," she says curtly, still braiding his hair. "We lost three fine operatives. I know you and Hound went through worse. I know people like you both don't bat an eye at that kind of assigments. Not everyone is like both of you. He didn't show up in the hospital, you tended to his wounds."
"I'm not loyal to Konoha. I'm loyal to Hound."
Yuugao is silent for awhile. Obito doesn't like the awkward silence. Yuugao is one of sweet Rin oldest friends. She also had to suffer the loss of close friends. So inconsiderate. Obito feels like a heartless person, instead he lets it go and puts his favourite leather eye-patch. To Yuugao young Raven feels like distant and detached snow-covered mountain peak.
"You missed the Trials," they sat in dark corner of the bar. "I saw Hound in the HQ two days ago, didn't expect to see you here so often. Heard you were injured on the mission." Obito gives him stinky eye. Crutches and gossips are too oblivious, but that's classified.
Genma and Raidou entered the ANBU when he was gone? They're Hokage bodyguards, it's not required to be an ANBU operative, only ANBU level shinobi. Minato is taking ROOT threat more seriously, even with double agent gone, the security comes first. Genma notices his braided hair, look lingers on leather eye-patch and Cat sitting nearby.
Sake on the table.
"I'm back on duty in two days," he says, lifting a cup of sake. ANBU doesn't celebrate. Does it have something to do with the failed attempt to stop the coup in the Snow, with the failed attempt to take over Kiri two months ago, when entire clan was slaughtered. Who would notice an orphan or two gone, an orphan with bloodline limit? "He stood me up, motherfucker."
"He told us to fetch you downtown if he won't make it. Don't worry. Your loveboy will be fine. Your Friend Killer has this impressive skill of getting whole and mainly unharmed from near-death situations."
Genma's prick was made to jab him in the sensitive point.
"Fuck off, he's not my loveboy," Obito growled, sipping his sake. "However, he'd made a fine Captain if he had any life goals."
"Except courting and trying to woo you?"
"If you guys weren't so busy gossiping and figuring out Hound love life, then you wouldn't fail in Snow."
Bingo. Genma flared up warning chakra.
"What the fuck."
"We're sharing the rent because it's too expensive to live on your own," Snow mission went worse than he anticipated. That's why Hound was so tense and with side wound he had stitched in their apartment. "Last time you saw me, I was choking on piece of candy. I'm really terrible at it, you see. That's why you should pay more attention to Hound next time. He's got knack for hidding his wounds. For a person with two functiong eyes and ANBU medical training you're infuriatingly blind."
"I would never-"
"Shut the fuck up," he was looking for his pocket money. "You're right, high ranking ANBU operative should seek medical attention and hiding injures is against the protocol. You know it's impossible to put an active duty ANBU in bed, yet alone Hound. He could bleed out and he'd happily die for the state. Shinobi die all the time and this is the most stupid way to die, bleed out with medic next to you. If you make it happen again, I'll stake you."
He dumps change money on the table, grabs both crutches and storms out of the bar.
What an awful day.
'How Shinobi should die'. Sometimes Obito wants to throw it out into the wastebasket, but sometimes he keeps it for no apparent reason. It's one of Kakashi's debatable reading choices and Obito often confronts that peculiar suicidal mindset.
But he's hypocrite, too.
After the confrontation during his first and last birthday party with Genma, he realized something else. He and Kakashi were inseparable. Even though his forced medical leave made him stay in Konoha while Kakashi was away on the missions, they were one.
'You two are different even in ANBU'. He tried to shake off and jack off Yuugao Uzuki words. They were no different from the rest of ANBU. Why does it hurt him?
Golden strap feels so good. It's heavy and when he's wearing the leather harness, he forgets about his sexual impairment.
Obito thinks about his own family too.
After running some errands for Minato and spending time inside the Uchiha district, he realizes that he had already tried to run away. Being inside the district made his skin crawl, an unwanted child, the one-eyed failure who gave his eye away. Sometimes he despises Minato for making him to get through the same humiliation he tried to escape after his parents died.
He left Uchiha for good. He buried his past away.
Why Minato rubs more salt on his unhealed wounds? Why it makes him feel like shit?
Obito reads the book whole until silver haired shadow is towering over him. There's no way his father could survive. He was involved into something that was big and dangerous. Obito himself was confronted by Danzo and almost spat into his face.
Hound eyes belongs to the dead man. He sees himself through his uncovered Sharingan eye and he's almost as dead as Hound.
Minato and Kushina are parents. Itachi and Sasuke are brothers. They live their small, petty lives. They drifted away and they're unable to make it back. He doesn't want to make it. Obito isn't going to say that.
Hound reaches to uncover his empty eye socket and caress sunken hole where his eyelids were sewn together to hide gaping, hideous wound on his unblemished cheek. Obito doesn't even flinch.
- You should eat a little more - he doesn't care if he sounds like a nagging bitch and Kakashi isn't hungry anymore. Sometimes he let's it slide and make Kakashi chew those disgusting ration bars as bedtime snack. Today is the day where he serves sliced ration bars with canned red beans for supper. Kakashi eats only a tiny bit. - You know what lack of proper nutrients can do, stupid.
Obito's nagging is half hearted talk, devoid of his usual self and Kakashi isn't even hungry.
'How Shinobi should die' is by the futon mattress.
He notices that Obito is wearing leather harness covering his nether regions. They start to make intense, heated love. They fuck hard and the dead man alive existential ache lessens. With sadness fucked out of their bodies, they fall asleep in each other arms intertwined.
Rest is essential, scarce in ANBU and Obito couldn't sleep. He's tired after night of sex and his mind is restless. Once he's done with forced leave, there won't be much time for overthinking.
When Orochomaru shows him the old team photo, Obito tries to understand his former sensei and current Hokage a bit more. Man in the Owl mask knows more about his life than Obito is willing to ask. The rift began to grow right after Naruto birthday, when he confronted the Kyuubi and left to deal with Black Zetsu.
Minato and Kushina still couldn't forgive him putting their first newborn boy in danger.
He did the right thing. He has no need to beg Minato for forgiveness.
Wasn't Minato always too late to save his students? He feels more connected to his current ANBU superior officers than the man he used to adore, like another person to fill in the missing father figure in his life.
Kakashi is still asleep, like the corpse.
Obito dispatches the clone to make actual breakfast because Kakashi will be awake soon, hungry. Obito does not move from his spot, letting Kakashi get enough sleep. If he dares to move, Kakashi will be awake in seconds.
Of course he despises Owl sometimes, but Owl doesn't cry over the dead Hero of the Sharingan. Captain has his respect. Obito is an underling supposed to behave and act like a soldier. He has a feeling that he takes him seriously. Obito hates being treated differently because of his past.
"You called me, Yondaime-sama," Owl bows, middle aged man still at his prime. "Did Raven caused you too much trouble?"
Hokage face was solemn and Owl knows his former teammate too well. Owl is very good in subtle art of manipulation, he's the second most important person in ANBU.
"I am unable to reach out to him, Owl."
"I admit, he's a bit of hassle," the leader of Team Ro smiles. He's responsible directly to the Commander and Hokage himself. Owl still remembers young Kitsune, a genius child with a death wish. Good influence of Eagle, Kushina and team softened him. "He's the best sensor I've ever seen. I'm glad I could help him grow more as shinobi."
Hokage shows no emotions and Owl knows that hurt.
"You've failed him, though." Owl minces no words. "I can't blame you, really. Sandaime pulled you out of ANBU straight to deal with three of young disaster children. You weren't ready and Lord Hiruzen was desperate for a skilled Jounin level shinobi. You still blame yourself for Sakumo. We all do. Snake, Eagle, you and I. Eagle died trying to find out the truth. You are shit at reading people, my Lord. You focused on young Hatake, overlooking your other students skills. You thought Obito's determination is enough to make him better ninja. You thought Rin is doing well enough on her own. After all, Obito and Rin's parents were alive. However, you forgot Obito's mother was dying and Eagle was in my team. You forgot about the burden war put on our medics shoulders. We let our soldiers become medics and medics became soldiers. We still reap what we sow. Raven posses an extraordinary skillset. It's true he's broken and needs to be subtly poked the right way, and he's disobeying my orders. I am forever grateful you let me choose my underlings, Yondaime-sama. "
"You haven't told him yet," Owl feels almost sorry for him. The burden of his words, but Minato has to hear the truth. "I wish I could reach out to him. Last time he told me that he's tired of people paying attention to him right now, only for his power. If I tell him the truth, he will never forgive me."
"You should be honest with your students. It's not easy to gain my soldiers trust and it's easy to lose it. Obito is complicated person and they refuse to socialize with everyone else. Like you used to be any better than them, Kitsune."
Hokage visibly shudders at memory of his ANBU days. Owl is right. Minato trusts Owl.
Owl leaves with new orders.
Spring is coming to Konoha and Raven comes back to the barracks he missed so much.
When he pressed hand to chest cavity and forced the live out of the enemies, his Raven mask was sneering.
People didn't see what's behind the painted mask. The man lips formed 'fuck you, The Slayer' before he forced the life out of his body.
Raven behind the mask is a hero of Konoha. He lives up to people expectations. Raven is loyal to Hound, not the village or the Elders or the Feudal Lord. He swore an allegiance to Hokage and his tattoo will terminate his life if he breaks the vows. The promises mean nothing, however. Just words on the wind.
"I heard you killed a man without drawing a weapon," Hound says. "This is what they say."
Raven removes the painted mask. "Does it matter?" Hound mask is smiling, sneering at him. How could he forget? Cold-Blooded Friend Killer. He leashes at him, blade drawn. Raven avoids it, Hound free hand holds him in chokehold. He kicks Hound in the groin and they fight together.
"I kicked their asses in your behalf," Hound says when they exchange the blows. "I don't let anyone say shit about you."
"Isn't that the purpose of shinobi, to kill silently without flashy ninjutsu? This is what a proper ninja do," Raven is teasing him, leaving an opening. Blade is conducting Raiton chakra, Raven grabs it with right hand, he feels distant tickling in his organic half.
"So is it true?" he watches both katanas in Raven's hands. Raven charges forward and disappears. "I wasn't wasting time on my leave," Hound is successfully fending him off with kunai. "I can master jutsu in three months."
Hound lost their duel. So it's true what they were saying. Snake showed this jutsu to Raven, when they were going undercover on Water Daimyou court. Why did Snake?
"When you choked me and electrocuted with chakra conducting blade, it felt so good," Obito says, voice soft. His extra long eyelashes flutter. "I won the duel. I want you to suck my dick tonight."
This evening, Obito is taking a bit longer in the shower. Kakashi is restlessly pacing in the living room, reading and cleaning. In the bathroom, Obito can sense his eagerness and impatience. Kakashi is really excited.
Pulling on heavy strap and strapping the harness properly takes time. Obito is taking too long.
"I told you to stay outside!" Obito hisses.
Gods. Gods.
It's golden dildo on the strap and Kakashi is hard only by looking at his lover.
"Obito-"
Kakashi is on his knees, eagerly removing his mask so he can suck it.
"Get out. Stay put," Obito uses every ounce of self control he has left. "Wait for me. Bad dog."
Kakashi practically whines outside for five long minutes, for eternity waiting in the living room. Obito bought himself a golden dildo, smug asshole.
"You give awesome blowjobs," Obito purrs. Kakashi's hands are tied behind his back. His sharp fangs clinging to his dildo.
Few hours later, Obito wakes up, his ass sore. Kakashi is asleep between his spreaded legs, drooling and maskless, his luscious lips holding the tip of the strapon.
It's endearing to see Kakashi felling asleep during the blowjob. When he moves to touch his beauty mark, red eye snaps open. The shock and vulnerability showing at Kakashi's bare face. Sharingan is recording those precious moments.
"Since today you're going to be my cocksucking loveboy," Obito touches the beauty mark. "How come you didn't tell me earlier?"
They share long kiss. The bright future is ahead of them.