"Oh my beautiful Serena!" Ma screamed, shuffling to her with open arms. She wrap her arms around her and gave her a tight hug. "Let me look at this beautiful face!" She pulled back from her hug, placed each hand on a cheek. "Still so beautiful. Eyes a little sad. But just as gorgeous as I always remembered." She went in to hug her again, with huge smile across her face.
Serena giggled. "Hello Ma." She hugged her back. "This is my friend Rita." Serena pulled away and pointed to Rita who stood behind her waving.
"Oh no, here we hug!" Ma pushed off of Serena lightly and shifted over to Rita trapping her in hug.
"Oh...okay." Rita said surprise. "She started to pat Ma's back.
"Serena you always had the most lovely friends." She looked Rita up and down. "And this one carries a special package." She started to gush. "May I?" She resistantly moved her hand towards Rita's belly.
"Of course!" Rita smiled putting her hand at the top of her belly and sticking it out.
"Oooo so precious." Ma smiled. She removed her hand from Rita's belly. Stepped back and looked at both the girls. "So what brings you two in today?"
Serena smiled, "We were having lunch and decided just to pop in. Is this a bad time?"
"Never a bad time for my sweet Serena. Come! I can go make tea." Ma started to walk to the lunch room.
"Well.." Serena stopped her. "We actually wanted to go see the baby room." Her voice dropped.
Ma turned around in her tracks. She looked at Serena eyes. They were glistening and pleading for her.
Ma took one step towards Serena, put both hands together. "Of course you can, let's go."
The two followed behind Ma, as she took them down a narrow hallway. "We keep the babies in the furthest room, to protect them." She explained. She turned left and then stopped in front of blue door pained with clouds. "Here we are." She pushed the door open and suddenly the sound of coos and cries, and smell of fresh baby powder hit Rita and Serena. They looked at each other and smiled. "Are you two just going to stand there or are you going to come in?" Ma teased.
The two caught themselves and headed in one after the other. They both washed their hands and split ways. Rita went to a baby that was being cared for by an aid. She watched as the aid changed him, then picked him up into her arms. The baby sucked on his hands. She then went to sit down next to a baby who was in a bouncer and she just observed. She smiled at the baby and handed her a toy. She threw it at Rita. Rita faked a surprised face causing the baby to laugh. She handed her the toy again, only for the baby to do the same thing. This went on for a good five minutes, until the view of Serena holding a little one caught her eye. Ma standing behind her.
She got up and walked over slowly. She observed how gentle Serena was with the baby. She slowly traced his face with index finger.
"Wow Sere," Rita said softly. "You're kind of a natural there."
"Huh?" Serena looked up to Rita. Her eyes were a little pink.
Rita didn't push it. She just let Serena enjoy her moment.
"This little man, is our newest. We call him Danny." Ma explained. "Mother and father were too young to care for him, so they gave him up at birth." Ma rubbed his head softly. "I am sure he will go to a good family soon. He is just so sweet."
Serena continued to lightly rock him only focused on him. She sighed. "I honestly thought I would be a mom by now." She whispered, her voice cracked. She sniffed her nose drawing back the tears. "Now I am not sure if I am ever going to have kids." She pulled Danny closer to her, resting him on her chest.
"You will be a mom one day Serena."
"I don't know... none of my eggs are viable and I can't bring myself to just sleep with some random person." She kissed Danny's forehead and leaned her head against the back of the rocking chair.
"What? Eggs." Ma was confused.
"It's a long story Ma." She ran her hands up and down Danny's back. She closed her eyes.
Ma's phone went off during the moment. She picked up. "Hello?" She whispered. Serena tuned her out and continued to focus on Danny. "I am in the baby room. Send him in."
"I am going to go sit with the other babies," Rita whispered to Serena. Serena opened her eyes and just nodded her head at Rita."
Serena just sat there with Danny on her chest. She continued to trace his little features. She put her index finger into his hand and he grabbed it. She rested her head lightly on his and started to hum.
"I will be right back." She lightly patted Serena's shoulder and walked towards the door.
Serena turned the chair slightly to face out the window as she continued humming her little tune.
Ma opened the door to the baby room, to be greeted by Darien. She put her finger to her mouth to hush him.
"Sorry Ma." He went in for a hug and as he pulled away he noticed Serena' golden blonde hair.
His eyes continued to be fixed on her as Ma pushed herself off. She followed his gaze and smiled.
"She looked beautiful holding that baby doesn't she?" She nudged him, bringing his attention back to her. "Let's step outside...too many adults in that room, overwhelm the babies."
"But Ma, Serena is here I want to go over-"
"Let her have her moment. Who knows when she will be able to cuddle a baby like that?" She took her shot at him and walked away. He followed with his head down.
After about an hour being in the baby room, Serena and Rita were politely asked to leave as it was night time. The two walked side by side with a smile across their face. Both gushing about how cute all the babies were.
"I am going to stop by here one more time before I leave." Serena said already missing the feeling of having Danny in her arms.
"I can't wait to hold my baby! I love baby smell." Rita patted her belly. Serena couldn't help but feel jealous.
"I have some time do you want to go grab lunch?" Serena asked, the two continued walking down the hall. Rita nodded. "We just need to say by to Ma and then I will ask her when I can come back."
"Where do you think she is?" Rita asked seeing if she could see Ma at the end of the hallway.
"Probably in the kitchen making tea." Serena navigated them both through the building to the kitchen, they could hear the whistling sound of the tea pot. "See I told you." She lightly knocked on the door and entered. "Ma?"
"Come in sweetheart." Ma called.
"Just wanted to let you know that we're leaving." Her voice dropped when she saw Darien standing behind Ma with two tea cups.
"Honey I made us all tea." Ma said with a smile. "Darien go grab a chair."
"Is it decaf?" Rita asked, hand still on belly.
"Actually Ma, Rita and I were heading out and we were going to get lunch."
"Lunch has been ordered!" Darien said abruptly.
"How did you even know we were here?" Serena asked confused.
"I stopped by the baby room and I saw you. I have been trying to call you since the other night."
"I've been busy and we already planned on going to grab food. Thanks though." Serena said turning towards Rita.
"Well... Sere..." Rita didn't move out of her way. "If they already ordered food and Ma already made tea."
Serena glared at her.
"It would be rude to let the food go to waste." Rita explained. "How long until it gets here?"
"Another 10 minutes." Darien answered putting the chair down.
Rita nudge Serena forward into the room. She followed close behind. "Can I help with anything?" Rita offered.
"No you two just sit. You both helped so much in the baby room." Ma waved her hand signaling them to sit. "I really appreciate it. Some days we get a little overwhelmed so you two being here was so nice. "
"I loved it in there." Rita smiled. "Makes me even more anxious to have this one, when it's ready to come out."
Serena just smiled at her friend.
"Serena you looked so comfortable with Danny." Ma acknowledged.
"He's really sweet. I had a hard time putting him down." She forced a smile. "I was actually wondering if I can come in one more time before I leave. Hopefully he will still be here."
"Of course!" Ma answered, putting a stack of plates down.
"W-When do you leave?" Darien asked sheepishly.
"Saturday." Serena started to distribute the plates. "I go back to work Monday and I want a day to just get caught up and organized."
"When will you come here?" He asked softly.
"I think the food should be here already. I am going to go get it." Ma said half way out the door.
"I will come with you!" Rita said getting up before anyone could say 'no.'
"Soo...when do you plan on coming here?" Darien asked again. "I would love to come with you."
"I am not sure. I still have to go see Molly." She started to put napkins out. "And her schedule is all over the place now that she is co-owner of the jewelry store with her brother."
Before Darien could ask another question, the two returned with all the food. Darien grabbed the bags from Rita and placed everything on the table. Lunch was finished before they knew it. Ma only had about 30-45 minutes before she had to cover the baby room again. Rita had made some plans with Andrew and he offered to pick her up.
Ma walked all three of them out, gave them hugs, waved to Andrew as he pulled up and went back into the orphanage.
"Sere are you sure you don't need a ride." Rita offered.
"I am fine." She waved her off. "I really need to walk off this lunch. My clothes are already feeling super tight." She giggled.
"You're such a dork. We really don't mind." Rita offered again.
"No, you go." She hugged Rita.
"I can always take you...or walk with you." Darien offered.
Serena just ignored his comment. Waved to Andrew as the parents to be drove off. Serena sighed and started walking to the park.
"Serena." Darien called as he tried to catch up with her.
"Thanks for lunch Darien, I am heading home."
"I can drive you!" He offered. He just wanted to be with her.
"I want to walk." She said still moving forward.
"Then I will walk with you."
With her small strides it wasn't hard for him to keep up to her.
"So...do you have kind of an idea of when you will be coming back?"
"No?" She said looking away from him. She crossed her arms as she continued to walk.
"Would you let me know when you come. I would love to go in with you."
"Why?" Serena asked confused.
"I mean, I love being there and..." He adjusted his jacket. "It is obviously something that obviously means a lot to you and I want to be there.
"Babies don't mean anything to you?"
"I never said that Sere, I want a family with you more than anything."
"Could have fooled me!"
"What is that supposed to me?" Darien asked, pulling on to her arm and stopping her. "And I would love for you to honestly tell me and not just beat around the bush?"
"You want to know the truth Darien?" Serena looked right at him. "Because in all the years we were together...how many times did we sleep together?" She cocked her head. "I don't mean just sleep together, I mean had sex?" She didn't give him a chance to answer. "0." She held up her hand that now making an "o."
"Serena...?"
"What, you were busy? You were tired? I was too young? I know every excuse Darien, and the truth is, we all know it is just because it is me." She released her other arm from his grip.
"You are not walking away." He grabbed her arm again. "We need to talk about this."
"There is nothing to talk about. For the most part you have to have sex to have a baby. I know I am not a doctor, but I know that part. I know that you never wanted to have sex with me. I was never the one you wanted to be with because let's be honest you were never actually attracted to me. The most I get from you on a good day is a quick peck on the lips."
"Sorry I like to keep things private?"
"See Darien!" She stepped away from him. "You don't get it. It is not just out in public, it's at home when we are together. When I am on the couch, you will choose to sit in the side chair. I sit next to you on the couch, you scoot away. On the nights we actually slept in the same bed you take your corner with your back to me...like the list goes on and on Darien." She put her hands up between them. "And I not mad at you. If anything I am more mad at me. One I am so in love with you." She bit the side of her lip. "The night we went flying, I wanted to just say forget let's get back together. "She looked up at the sky. "And then you dropped me off and just kissed more forehead?" She looked back at him confused. "Then it reminded another reason I am mad at myself... I couldn't make myself the person you wanted and it is just what is." She threw her hands to her sides and exhaled.
"You aren't even giving me a chance to explain anything here!" Darien argued.
"Because Darien, what is there to explain? There were nights when I threw myself at you and you just pushed me off. So many years." Her eyes started water. "You wanted to be a doctor. And I supported you through it all. I waited for you, I let you put me on the back burner as you built your career." She pressed her lips together. "Darien, I know Rini is special and we are supposed to wait until she is ready to be ours, but I really thought we would have maybe had another one first? Foolish I guess." She took a step back. Fixed her bangs and turned away.