Hi! Sorry for the long wait, and thank you for the love you have shown this story.

You probably know that Dee Creston, fanfic's loving grandma, has passed away. I will miss her kind, thoughtful reviews and her hugs and smooches. I'm sure she is sitting with her laptop in heaven, chuckling over our stories. :)

Many, many thanks to Fran, my ever diligent beta.

Any mistakes you find are mine.

Chapter-19

Isn't it remarkable how much difference the presence or absence of just one person can make in the atmosphere of a place?

Even though Jasper was a good guy, and had been a close friend of Tony, his departure made me feel as if a weight had lifted off my shoulders. The moment the cab's taillights disappeared in the cold, foggy morning, I felt myself smiling as I turned back towards the house.

Why? Why did I feel happier and lighter with him gone? After all, he was an ally, helping me in the search of whoever was responsible for the death of my brother. The information he shared with me could be valuable in keeping Bella—and my family—safe. And yet, here I was, wanting to break into a jig as I entered the house.

As I looked at Bella and Alice, sitting close by on the couch and giggling, I knew the answer.

Bella felt uncomfortable in front of Jasper, perhaps because he had seen her at Anthony's place and until an hour ago thought of her as Anthony's girlfriend. Even though Bella had clarified that part, it probably made her feel awkward to have his eyes on her. It certainly made me feel conscious of my actions.

It was hard enough to stay away from Bella before I knew for certain she liked me as well. Now it was going to be impossible. So, Jasper not being around was a definite bonus.

Of course, I wasn't a teenager, so I would still keep some boundaries in front of my aunt and uncle. Not to mention that Bella herself was in a delicate place, physically as well as emotionally. I was certainly not going to push her in any way.

And then she looked up and smiled at me, and I could almost see all my good intentions flying out the window. The way her deep, dark eyes sparkled; they made me feel as if there was no one around us. They pulled me closer: I didn't even notice when Alice got up and left the room. I was only aware of Bella's hand reaching out for mine, of sitting down beside her, of having her small, warm body in my arms, and of her soft lips connecting with mine.

No one disturbed us. For long, leisurely moments, we kissed and touched without the heavy shadow of guilt hanging over us. Those moments led to a moment of mutual content and relaxation. Before I knew, I was asleep.

I woke up to the feeling of Bella's soft breath tickling my neck, and the sound of soft conversation drifting in from the kitchen.

"I have never seen Edward so content, you know," said Esme's musical voice. "Bella is definitely good for him. I know Carlisle is skeptical, but I won't let him drive Bella away."

"He's just worried, Mom." Alice. "I mean, yes, Bella is a sweet girl, but she may not stay in Edward's life for very long. Now, don't give me that look; I'm on your side. But think about it—she has had a major shock recently, she is still recuperating from injuries, and she herself said she had never had love and support before. She might think she loves Edward, but can you be sure she won't feel differently once she's on her feet again? That's all I am saying."

"Oh Alice, my college-going, cynical child," Esme crooned, "have a little faith. I know they haven't met in the best of circumstances, but there's much more than mere attraction or even a desire to comfort each other over a shared loss between them. Besides," she continued in a teasing tone, "didn't you tell Edward Bella liked him?"

"I am not going back on it," Alice retorted. "But liking someone, or even loving them, does not mean being together for life. Just don't start planning a wedding, okay?"

Esme laughed, a soft, silvery sound. "I won't, but I am telling you now, it will happen. And I know you are intuitive enough to realize it, but you're trying to be practical like your father. That's okay. Let's promise not to meddle in their lives, one way or the other. They will find their way on their own."

Alice agreed and added she was going to see a couple of old friends. The sound of her footsteps fading away was followed by Esme humming a sweet melody.

The conversation didn't exactly disturb me, but it did leave me wondering about some issues. I was touched that Esme was confident Bella and I would have a long relationship, and as for her planning a wedding…I hadn't thought about it, but there was no doubt I would want it at some point. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.

The question was, would Bella want the same, or would she fall out of…what? After all, she wasn't in love with me. She had said she liked me, and even though the way she said it made me feel it was more than just liking me, how could I be sure?

Bella woke up a few minutes later, yawning and stretching. I could see her eyes widening as she took in her surroundings.

"I'm so sorry. You must be so uncomfortable," she apologized, trying to move away.

I had to smile at her bashful expression. "I'm not in the least uncomfortable, sweetheart," I assured her, placing a hand on her back so she wouldn't move too far.

A shy smile curved her lips upwards. "Sweetheart?"

I scratched my neck. "Uh, yes, is that okay? I know it's a bit old-fashioned…"

"I love it," she interrupted, eyes shining with honest emotion. "No one has ever called me sweetheart, you know? Jake was…well, we were more friends than anything else, even when he became my boyfriend. We didn't have this…intensity."

She felt an intensity between us. That was good. It pointed to more than like.

"Um, my mom used to call me sweetheart," I informed her, nostalgia coloring my tone. "Esme does too…so I guess…Not that I'm your mom, or aunt—" I stopped, flustered, as Bella began to laugh.

"Did anyone say something about me?" Esme enquired, smiling as she entered the room. She held a tray in her hands, which she placed on the coffee table in front of us.

"Neither of you ate much for breakfast, so I made sandwiches. Why don't you have a bite and go for a walk? The weather's not too bad, for a change."

Hmm, Esme might not be pushing us, but she was definitely nudging.

Not that I had anything against going for a walk with Bella. Or having a sandwich or two. In fact, I realized I was famished.

I thanked Esme and enthusiastically devoured a couple of sandwiches, happy to notice that Bella managed to finish one. It was definitely an improvement on her usual lack of appetite.

"You feel up to a walk, Bella?"

"Sure."

Esme was right. The weather was pretty good for late December—sunny, crisp and clear. I offered my arm to Bella, mindful of the slippery patches here and there, and she took it with a smile.

We strolled quietly for a few minutes, while I tried to gather my thoughts and phrase them in a manner that wouldn't be considered pushy. Finally, I decided that sharing my thoughts would be better than asking questions.

I began by telling Bella about Anthony and me when we were younger, about our parents and losing them, and the effect it had on us. I told her how therapy helped Tony and how I hoped it will help me. She listened intently, nodding and asking questions in between.

I told her how insecure I felt before she had revealed Tony had never been her boyfriend. That definitely puzzled her.

"Why would you feel that?"

"Well, Tony was so handsome and charming…"

Bella raised an eyebrow. "Are you fishing for compliments? You do remember you were twins, right?"

I laughed self-consciously. "Yes, of course I do. I didn't mean—it's not just a matter of looks, you know? He always had this confidence, this charisma; when he walked into a room, he lit it up. I always felt like I was his shadow or something—"

My words were cut off as Bella put her hand on my lips and shook her head quickly. "You are wrong, Edward. You are very much your own person. Anthony was an amazing guy, but please don't count yourself as any less. Once I got over my disbelief about his death, I always saw you as an individual—a wonderfully sensitive and caring individual. I like you just as you are."

I swear my whole face felt hot. Was I blushing? Way to be manly, Edward!

"Hey," she said gently, indicating a bench nearby, probably the very bench we had sat on last evening. "Let's sit for a moment. I think we need to clarify some things."

Was it only a day since I had shared with Bella my feelings for her? It seemed much longer.

We sat facing each other, and Bella took my hand in both of hers.

"Edward, why do you compare yourself with Anthony? Really?"

I exhaled a short, sharp breath. "I wish I had a valid reason to give you, Bella. It's not as if my parents treated us differently, or we had dramatically opposite lives at school. I mean, yes, he was always the popular one, but I had friends too. My life wasn't bad in any way, just…quieter, and I preferred it that way. But over the years, I couldn't help noticing the way people were attracted to Tony. It never bothered me—well, not much—but when I met you…"

She arched an eyebrow. "What?"

I half-shrugged. "At first, I thought there was no way you would be attracted to me, after having been with Tony. And later, I was afraid you might like me but only because my face is the same. I'm sorry—that was unfair to you."

"Oh Edward," Bella raised a hand and stroked my face from temple to chin. "You have a beautiful face, and it does affect me. I'm not blind, you know. But you know what is even more beautiful?" She placed her hand over my heart. "This right here, this is what pulls me to you. Please don't doubt that. I realize we haven't known each other very long, but I hope you will give me a chance to prove that my feelings for you are genuine."

I felt my lips lift in a smile. "Really?"

"That right there," she said, touching my lips with her forefinger. "That is the smile I love, Edward. And when it's directed towards me—I can't tell you how that makes me feel. I feel…all warm and melty inside, like chocolate in the sun." She shook her head self-consciously. "Oh, that was a terrible analogy, wasn't it?"

This time I laughed. "Not at all. I love that I can make you feel melty. And I love anything chocolate, by the way."

I also noted and tucked away in my mind that Bella loved my smile.

"In that case, I will ask Esme to teach me your favorite desserts, particularly those with chocolate," she promised. "Anything else you want to talk about?"

I sighed. There was something I should tell her. I just wasn't sure how she would take it.

"Yes, actually. A couple of years ago, while I was on a case, I was shot in the leg."

"Oh, no!" Bella gasped, squeezing my hand tightly. Her eyes clouded over with worry. "Oh, Edward."

I squeezed her hand back. "It's all right now. I got medical attention quickly and the operation was successful. Unfortunately, there was some damage to the bone that could not be fully corrected, so my left leg isn't as good as the right. I mean, I can walk fine, but running and jumping…not so much."

There were tears in Bella's eyes. "I'm so sorry that happened. Does it hurt still?"

I shrugged. "Sometimes, in bad weather, or if I do too much standing. It could have been worse, I suppose. Uh, is that something you can live with? Or is it…too much?"

I didn't want to ask her directly if it would change her feelings, but I had to know. If it was going to be an issue, it would be better to stop this right now, even if it would kill me.

Bella was silent, staring at me with wide eyes as a few tears dropped down her cheeks. It made me feel uncomfortable.

"I should have told you before, right?" I muttered, shifting nervously in place. "It's just…there didn't seem to be any point, if you didn't feel anything for me. It's okay if—"

Bella wiped roughly at her tears. "What are you talking about? I'm sad only because you had to go through all that, Edward. Do you really think I am that shallow, that my feelings might change because you have an injury?"

I released a breath I hadn't realized I had been holding. "I didn't want to presume anything, Bella. It might be a big deal for some people, you know? And I wouldn't even blame them. That's why—" I swallowed before I could continue speaking. "That's why I rarely date: I'm always questioning myself what will happen if we make some progress and then I tell her and she freaks out…But when I met you, I couldn't stop myself, in spite of all the obstacles. The more I got to know you, the more I wanted to be with you—"

Her hand touched my cheek, and I leaned into it instinctively. "Edward, I feel that pull as well. It confused me in the beginning. How could I feel something for a stranger? And then there were my circumstances…they were weird, to say the least. I was scared and hurt and just…I had no idea where my life was going. But you…you make everything better, so much better." She gave a small laugh. "I don't know what you see in me—"

I didn't let her complete her sentence, tilting my head and kissing her once, twice, thrice, until she gave up trying to talk and kissed me back. When we broke away, both of us were smiling like loons.

"Let's make a pact, Bella."

She looked at me curiously. "Um-hmm."

"Let's not think of what is wrong with us, okay? Instead, let's be grateful for having found each other, for how right this is—this thing between us. Let's move on from the past and the pain it brought us. Live in the present, all right?"

Her smile widened. "All right, Edward. Let's do that."

A.N. Do you agree with Alice or Esme? :)

Should Edward have told Bella about his injury earlier? What do you think? Share your thoughts with me!

Oh, good news! Lost Love Found has been nominated in the Top Ten contest for March. Please go to TwiFanficRecs and vote for it.

Take care, and pray that this pandemic gets over soon.