Everybody loves a grovelling Darcy... ;)
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Chapter 23
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Elizabeth burst in to the kitchen, downing two men with her fire and then turned to the rest of the room.
She looked up at the man opposite her, preparing to send more fire arrows if necessary. She was quick to recognise the dishevelled form of her husband. The look he was giving her was far from the angry look on his face when they had last spoken. He rushed towards her and she let out a shocked gasp as he gathered her in to his arms.
"Oh Elizabeth." He breathed and she could not help but hug him back.
"You are almost drained, even with those two men." She said, stepping away from the contact. "Here." She reached out and passed him some of her excess energy.
A look of disappointment flashed across Darcy's face as she stepped away from him, but he smiled grimly and accepted the energy, sighing in relief.
"Come." She had said. "We are not finished yet."
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The rest of the battle could hardly be called that. The men, once their scouts had been taken, quickly realised they were out numbered and out magicked. A few put up a fight and were quickly subdued. A few, the ones with a greater sense of self survival, fled.
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Darcy watched as Elizabeth moved here and there, setting things straight, warming water for tea and serving him in some rudimentary cups. He sniffed his, willow bark. He grimaced and swallowed it quickly, the burning water no more than a mild irritation for him. She quickly refilled it with a more fragrant blend of tea and he smiled gratefully at her, her eyes did not meet his.
The last few hours had been fraught with danger, excitement and daring. The men who had been guarding the house had been, mostly, subdued by the time Darcy had escaped his prison. The strategy of the small group of Pemberley magicians had ensured very few injuries and none serious. A couple of the men had escaped and the colonel had led two on a chase. The remaining had hastened toward the nearest town to arrange for a constable to help with arranging imprisonment for the captured men. Darcy had not been well enough, despite arguments on his part, to join either group. He had accepted guard duty after Elizabeth had declared she would guard the captured witches and wizards alone.
He watched her, his wife, move around a bit more. She had changed back in to a travelling dress, the sight of her in trousers was still burned upon his mind.
He knew they had much to discuss and now seemed as good a time as any.
"Elizabeth."
His voice sounded rusty and sore, he cleared his throat and tried again "Elizabeth?"
She stopped what she was doing, her back to him, there was a moment he wondered if she would even talk to him but after a pause she turned around, a look of expectation on her face.
"Please sit, we need to talk."
She sat, picking up her tea cup and taking a dainty sip. He looked at her, she could be sat in the drawing room of a countess; her posture was perfect, her hands steady and she held her cup daintily. What was most disconcerting was the look of cool indifference on her face. He was prepared for anger or hatred, he could work with negative emotions, beg her forgiveness, make amends. But indifference was harder to speak to. He looked down at his hands and began anyway.
"I owe you so many apologies, almost since the beginning of our marriage I have been wronging you. I have no excuse save the one, which is a poor one. I am so used to dealing with my family's affaires with little help that I approached this problem in the same way. I did not think of the effect my actions would have on you, or how you might interpret the meaning behind them. It did not occur to me that you could, nay should, be told of the threats to the family. Nor did I think that you would be able to aid me, although now I truly see how ridiculous I was being."
He chanced a look at her, her posture was a little stiffer, her hands no longer steady and calm, her face was still set in the picture of cool indifference. But he knew she was listening.
He sighed "I cannot apologise enough for the hurt you have felt at my hands. My loss of temper, good lord was it only yesterday? It was unforgivable. I have no excuse only the explanation of feeling so much worry over the last few months. I have been worried about loosing you, feeling like you were in constant danger, I have had very little sleep trying to find new lines of enquiries about the people who wished us harm as well as trying to find any scrap of information about your abilities and what could become of us."
He looked at her again, her eyes were no longer cold, but the emotions were not all sympathetic, he could read the hurt and anger in there. He moved in front of her and knelt by her feet, wincing a little in pain.
"Please know that you are more dear to me than anything, I love you" he kissed her hands which were now shaking where they were nestled in his "I love you more than I do myself, more than Pemberley or my family name. Nothing could have convinced me to act so; except that I felt I was protecting you. I could not bear you being subject to examination, or scrutiny, by anyone. I was concerned that the men in power might see yours without seeing you and seek to use you. We are a nation at war and a true magician would be of aid in that war. Before we wed; my cousin suggested as much and I was plagued by nightmares of you being taken from me and sent to the continent, a target for French spies and any who seek power."
He knew he was rambling by this point, but he could not help it.
"I see now that I should have just spoken to you. I should have shared this burden with you, but you seemed to have so many new burdens I did not wish to give you any more. I am sorry. I am sorry for failing you as a husband should never fail his wife."
The tears burned the back of his eyes as he brought her hands to his mouth once more.
"Shhhh" Elizabeth removed one of her hands from his and stroked the back of his head "silly, vexing man. Do not go on so, it makes it hard to continue to be cross."
He looked up at the teasing tone in her voice. Her eyes were shining with unshod tears and a small amount of humour.
"We make a very odd picture the pair of us here."
A lift in the corner of his mouth "I will pose for any picture if it might bring about your forgiveness."
She smiled softly at him "I cannot dissemble sir, you lack of confidence in me has been the cause of some distress and there is much we need to discuss, another time another place." She sighed. "But I should like to start anew, if that suits you?"
"I cannot agree to such a thing" he noted her crestfallen face and he stroked her cheek "there are many aspects of the last few months that I would not wish to change. But as to my stubborn tendency to keep my own council I can assure you it will not happen again. You will be veritably bored of all my ramblings before the first year of our marriage is over."
He smiled in response to her chuckle.
"I am so sorry I did not speak of the concerns raised about your abilities combining with mine. Would you allow me to tell you of the Darcy legacy?"
She nodded and he moved to sit next to her, bringing her head to rest upon his shoulder as he relayed all he knew of the Darcy powers. He discussed all he knew of his parents and their powers, the different branches of the Darcy family tree, how the power had faded in some but not others. His research had led him to believe that the power was strongest in a marriage of affection.
"I understood the powers were passed as two magical auras combined in the passion of a union between husband and wife. With both of us being of a powerful disposition I became convinced that we would be unable to contain such power and it scared me."
His voice trailed off as she lifted her head.
"I understand why your thoughts had led you to this conclusion. I wish that you had deemed me worthy to speak to about this."
"'Twas not a lack of faith in you, but myself. I convinced myself that if I spoke to you of it and you tried to persuade me that it was all nonsense, I would be only too easy to be persuaded. You are so very tempting to me and it would not have taken much for my resolve to break. I did not wish to put the burden of that decision on you, and so took it upon myself."
Elizabeth stroked his face, seeing the depth of pain he had suffered and her heart softened.
"We have, both of us, suffered."
They stayed like that, in silence, looking in to each other's eyes and caressing gently for a few minutes. Darcy's hand travelled down her arm to her hand, where it rested on her lap. He looked down frowning, then looked up quickly.
"Do you think you are with child?"
She smiled and stroked her hand across her, still flat, abdomen. Although there were no outward signs she fancied she could feel the life within her. She knew she was merely anticipating the life to grow, but the thought gave her comfort and so she would not use logic to drive away such thoughts.
"I feel very silly for having missed the signs" she laughed lightly "I have not had my courses since we were at Pemberley for the flooding. I should have noticed their absence at Matlock."
Darcy grimaced "Another failing to add to my hopelessly long list. I am so sorry about my uncle, he has been most dismissive of you, and then his behaviour at Matlock!" He shook his head, still hardly believing the awful actions of his uncle.
He stopped and looked at her intently, she noticed the fear in his gaze and smiled at him reassuringly.
"He did not importune me in that manner, you need not fear. This baby is all Darcy."
Darcy looked relieved "I did not mean to have such a thought but I was reminded of your ordeal."
"Tis all forgotten. Your aunt, and cousins, and you, will ensure nothing of the sort will occur again. Let us go back to the more pleasant topic of your child."
He smiled broadly at that and motioned for her to continue talking of such pleasant a subject.
"I have been more tired of late, but I have not been sleeping well and did not think more on it. The occasional feelings of nausea were so infrequent that they did not signify. Twas the gypsy woman who pointed out my condition, and it does explain why you feel the way you do."
Darcy nodded, caressing her abdomen through the folds of her dress. He then leaned in and kissed her there, which elicited a giggle.
Elizabeth took a deep breath "there is one more thing I would wish to speak to you about, before we return to the house."
Darcy looked up, wary.
"What happened between you and Miss Bingley?"
Darcy winced and groaned in dismay "I had forgotten, well not forgotten, but" he couldn't think of the words and instead whispered "again I apologise. I had drunk more spirits than I care to think on, I assure you 'tis not a usual practice of mine. I had found your letter and was feeling sorry for myself. When Bingley was too drunk to stand, Richard took him to bed, Miss Bingley must have happened upon me."
He frowned at the recollection.
"The event is exceedingly muddled in my mind. I was thinking of you and she" he frowned harder again "she smelled like you" he looked at her sharply "could Miss Bingley have gotten hold of your fragrances?"
Elizabeth shrugged, she had a few bottles of her preferred scent, 'Twas possible one was missing, she could check on her return and she told him she would do so.
"It was only a few minutes before I noticed something was not right." He looked up "did you see me?" She nodded, the pain evident in her eyes "what had brought you down?"
Now it was Elizabeth's turn to frown "I had a message."
Darcy's face grew thoughtful, then grim, his mouth turned down. She touched him lightly on the arm regaining his attention.
"Do you think the whole situation was engineered?"
Darcy nodded "it was thank's to Miss Bingley that I found your letter, and extra wine was sent to us at one point. I believe she had a hand in the whole thing."
Elizabeth looked shocked "for what gain? I am aware of her tendre for you, but to stoop to such a levels is" Elizabeth had no words and instead uttered an unladylike exclamation of disgust.
"No matter Miss Bingley's involvement, I cannot forgive myself for my own part in it." He turned her face to his "I am truly sorry."
Elizabeth pressed her lips together and then sighed "I suppose I can add that to your list."
Darcy smiled "am I forgiven?"
"In part, I will be expecting some recompense for many of those apologies!"
Darcy's mouth lifted at the tease "I am at your disposal dear lady" and he raised her hands to kiss the fingers again.
Elizabeth sighed, she had but one more point of contention to address for the last six months of marriage. But she did not know if she had the strength to address it right then. She cast her eyes down, the light was fading and she hoped there was not enough to see the expression on her face.
"We still have much to face" she was pleased to note that her voice did not waver.
"Yes" his voice was gravelly, "Fitzwilliam will find the ones missing, the constabulary will be here to take care of the men we have captured so far."
"The gypsy woman said this was merely a battle, the war was yet to be fought."
Darcy looked up in surprise "let us hope that is not in the near future."
They smiled at each other, more at ease than Elizabeth had felt for a long time. She decided not to approach her last reservation of their relationship. She recalled the words of her dear friend, some men were not fond of close contact and it was possible that Darcy was likewise afflicted. His reticence in holding and kissing her may have been partly related to his concern about their magic but there also may be roots in the normality of married life. Given their newfound understanding she did not wish to overset matters by discussing something of her wanton thoughts and risk loosing his good opinion.
That decided she set about preparing a fire to await the arrival of the rest of their group