Brace yourselves…
Bonnie found herself tired from the day's drama already as her cheek squished into Damon's chest. With the sunlight warming the room and Damon's strong arm slung around her body, sleep captured her overworked mind and switched it off for a while, taking her to dreams filled with sunshine, Damon, and his lips.
Damon twirled his fingers in her hair as he watched her muscles twitch softly. He admired her peaceful form as she drifted off. Her long lashes fanned out over the apex of her rosy cheeks. Her button nose curved into a steep slope that ended just above her lips, which pouted into a delicate rosebud eager for his kiss. Soft curls wrapped around his fingers as they dipped into her mass of red ringlets and pulled back with expert gentleness so as not to disturb her.
His thoughts drifted as he stared out the window into the yard of the boarding house. The perfectly kept grass stretched on for yards into a patch of trees that bristled against one another in the slight afternoon breeze. His ears picked up the sweetest tones of her voice, wrought with anger, frustration, and guilt as she shouted at Stefan. His brother sounded just as angry, yet helpless, as his rough voice ebbed and flowed, rising and falling at each of her admissions and explanations. Damon could only assume, of course, but in his heart he knew. She was telling him things meant for his ears. She was confessing the truth of her feelings, which should have been a secret only exchanged between them.
Damon glanced down at Bonnie, her tiny body curled up against him. One leg entwined between his, one arm possessively locked across his torso. Her front squished against his side in her fitted tank top. She was a beautiful sight, so innocent, but so temptatious. Spurts of fire reminiscent of fireworks shot through his body as her lavender scent assaulted his nostrils, endlessly intoxicating. His fangs ached to bury into her skin and claim her for eternity. His heart surged to keep her there, at his side, forever. Yet, that melodic voice spouting illegible words in his supernatural ears tugged at him. He couldn't ignore his intrigue with her, what would it be like to have her? To truly hold her?
Fiery strands turned gold and straight as he stared at the hair between his fingers. He felt the small body against him lengthen as alabaster skin molded sinfully around his body. Her face rested in serenity against his shoulder, flawless and regal with her full lips and lightened lashes. What would it be like if she were lying with him right now, and not Bonnie?
Damon flinched as his chest panged violently. Visions of her faded to reveal the reality of the girl settled into his chest. She wasn't blonde or tall, her skin wasn't like a porcelain doll's but like a pale maiden of Irish descent. She wasn't confident or indefinitely courageous, she wasn't a princess of darkness, she was his redbird, a princess of fire shining in a light all her own. The thought of her being somewhere else, being with someone else…it would drive him insane.
He needed to talk to Elena.
Partway through her nap, after hearing Elena's door slam and Stefan's boots stomping across the hardwood floor, Damon slipped from Bonnie's grip. Draping a soft blanket over her legs, he sorted quickly through a small pile of stuffed animals at the foot of her bed. Tossing Mutt's bear to the side, he found a rather large stuffed elephant and pushed it into her arms for her to hold. Brushing her curls back from her cheek, he pressed his lips to her warm skin and let them linger. He would be back. He would. And she would be smiling up at him. He could have her all he wanted, however he wanted. The thought comforted him, gave him courage, motivated him to return quickly.
As soon as he stepped into the hallway, he saw Elena topping the stairs, tears staining her elegant complexion. She froze as her eyes met his, and suddenly he wasn't sure what to say to her. She knew so much about he and Bonnie's relationship…too much. Was she gearing up to yell at him, slap him, punch him? He would let her. Maybe he deserved it.
Instead, Elena hurriedly dried her tears and attempted to compose herself.
"Can we talk?" he managed to ask.
Elena's lapis orbs studied his and she nodded slowly.
"Let's go to my room." Damon suggested and Elena followed down the hall.
Damon sat at the foot of his own bed and Elena mimicked him, nervously sitting at the head of the bed to keep a fair distance between them. Damon sighed, something in him wanting to close that gap creating more and more tension between them.
"What did you want to talk about?" she asked, her voice hoarse and breathy from her fight with Stefan.
Damon scooted just a bit closer to her, "I'm sorry—for hurting you…"
Elena held up a hand, waving it slightly as she shook her head, "Damon, we don't need to—"
"We do." Damon interjected.
Elena took in a deep breath as she looked at him through unsure crystals of oceanic blue. Damon begged her to hear him out wordlessly. She sniffled and bowed her head defeatedly, helpless to Damon's unspoken plea. She nodded, giving him the go ahead.
"You need to know how I feel, not just about Bonnie…"
Elena perked up curiously. She inched closer this time.
Damon wiped a hand across his face begrudgingly as he began, "I wasn't trying to hurt you by being with Bonnie. We just…" he struggled for words, "I don't know. We connected and things became very—intense."
Elena cleared her throat, shifting awkwardly.
Damon huffed and continued on, "I couldn't just ignore it. I tried so hard, Elena, but I—" he faltered and raked a hand through his raven hair, "it wouldn't let up…"
Elena's golden brows scrunched over her eyes, "What wouldn't?"
Damon released his long-held breath and let his hand drop from his head, "how much I wanted her."
The sharp breath Elena sucked in didn't go unnoticed by Damon as a needle stabbed right into his heart.
"Are you in love with her?" Elena questioned suddenly, catching Damon off-guard.
Damon's dark depths intruded into her lapis jewels and she felt overexposed, but she couldn't look away. Seeming to find what he needed, he lowered his gaze and stroked his jawline once in ponderance. Elena's eyes traveled with his fingers, over his chiseled jaw, his strong chin, and his full lips.
"I—don't know…" Damon finished uncertainly.
"Are you in love with…me?" Elena asked, keeping her eyes trained on her hands picking at the hem of her shirt.
She felt the bed shift as Damon closed the space between them. His fingers glazed over her cheeks as he took her face between his hands. Her heart fluttered at the contact and she leaned into one of his hands, reveling in the feeling.
"I'll always love you, princess." Damon breathed, getting lost in the deep blue seas sucking him in like undertow.
A single tear slipped down Elena's cheek, "I'm confused, Damon. I'm so confused. My heart is with Stefan, but some part of me keeps pushing me toward you."
Damon chuckled shortly, "I know how you feel—believe me."
He brushed the tear from her porcelain skin. One of her hands reached up to cup his cheek and caress the skin beneath her thumb.
"I wasn't trying to keep you as a backup. I just—I was hoping to have time to figure out my feelings for you."
"This isn't me trying to rush you."
Elena snorted softly just once, "Well I'm already out of time. I lost you to one of my best friends. Now I'll never know…"
Her thumb moved down, grazing across his lower lip. As if something pulled her, she leaned in, eyes trained on his mouth and unable to fight it. Damon's lips parted automatically, looking at hers with heavy-lidded obsidian orbs. His breath caught as hers reached his tongue, permeating it with her pure flavor. Her vanilla and honeysuckle scent flooded his nostrils and effectively hushed the parts of his brain threatening to overthink.
Her lips collided with his and the kiss went from soft to feverish in a millisecond. His hands tangled in her long strands of red—no gold! Elena moaned into his mouth as she let his tongue dance with hers. Her flavor was sweet, but not as pungent as…
Her fingers trailed through his hair as Damon kissed her harder. Her rosebud lips—no! Damon's brows knotted; her lips were larger, more artfully carved with a near-perfect cupid's bow. And they were so soft, too soft. His head was getting hazy as he melted further and further into her, but something nagged him. He shook it off as Elena pushed her chest against his, it was fuller than he was used to and his mind drifted to flashes of her. Her little features and curves, how she wrapped her petite body around his, her high-pitched screams sending shivers down his body as he got lost in the ecstasy of her. Her big, brown eyes that melted like chocolate every time he looked at her…
Elena's arms wrapped around his neck and he kissed her hard, winding his own arms around her body to keep her close. A fire in him burned bright, igniting every single vein with every kiss, but his heart was still yearning, still pining for another. His lips beckoned for a smaller mouth, his hands searched for a tinier frame, both came up blank.
A creak of the door snapped his mind into high-alert and then a tiny voice sent him reeling.
"Da—" the voice froze and Damon whipped his head around just quick enough to see Bonnie's heart shatter.
Elena pushed herself back against the bed's headboard as far as she could go, trying to create as much distance as possible between herself and the man she was just kissing. She put a hand up to her lips, her eyes wide as saucers as they stared at her small, red-headed friend just in time to see her break from the inside out.
Sobs burst from Bonnie lips as she turned on her heel and ran back the way she came. Elena watched Damon scramble, for the first time in her life, as he sprung from the bed and raced after her.
"Bonnie!" he called, the pain in his tone reverberating in Elena's ears as she watched him storm from his own bedroom and completely leave her behind.
"No! No! Bonnie, please!" Damon yelled after her as he ran down the hallway, some part of him unable to reach his vampiric speed.
Tears flooded his eyes, blurring his vision as he tried desperately to reach her. His chest throbbed viciously, radiating pain so powerful through his body that he nearly collapsed. But he couldn't; not until he reached her. Bonnie collapsed against the wall by her door, nearly hyperventilating as sobs wracked through her body and shook her savagely. He ran up right behind her and immediately captured her head in his hands, turning it to his. She pushed at him weakly, swinging her arms in lazy motions, her cries taking every ounce of energy from her body.
Damon ignored the tears streaming down his own face as he frantically tried to get her to look at him, to just give him one second of her attention.
"Please look at me! Please, just—"
An agonizing wail left her mouth as she collapsed to her knees. Damon could feel his something in him ripping apart and he followed, falling to his knees in front of her.
"No!" Bonnie shouted through her hiccupped bawling, giving him one push with all the strength she had left.
Meredith rushed up the stairs with Stefan in tow.
"What the hell happened?!" Meredith yelled over the commotion.
Her green orbs landed on Damon, crying furiously as he tried to coax Bonnie to listen. Then her eyes shifted to her best friend, scuttling backwards from Damon as she cried her heart out. Her face was puffy and bright red as she watched her break down. She had seen this once before, but not like this, not this audibly, never this painful.
"What did you do?!" Meredith screamed at Damon as she rushed over to Bonnie and helped her up off the floor. The small girl instantly turned into Meredith and wept. Her shirt was soaked through in seconds as she felt Bonnie's uneven breaths coming fast and hard against her arm.
Damon slammed his fists into the floor, causing everyone to flinch as the foundation shook. He dug his hands into his hair then, looking as if he might rip it from his scalp. A creak in the floor boards turned Meredith's head up towards the end of the long hallway. Elena walked slowly from Damon's room and everything clicked into place.
Light fell from Meredith's eyes as they narrowed maliciously. A loud snap sounded behind her and she knew without seeing that Stefan's hand had crushed the wooden railing.
"Damon…" she called, worried as she rushed down to the broken Salvatore.
Meredith shielded Bonnie from the coming interaction but before she could Damon's vampiric nature had masked his face in a fit of unfiltered rage. Meredith held a hand up for Elena to stop.
"Elena, don't!" Meredith commanded, and the thin blonde froze.
Meredith weighed her options, Matt having gone for a drive to cool off, and was only left with Stefan.
"Stefan, could you take Bonnie somewhere else? Please?" she begged, urging him to cooperate.
Swallowing his pride, Stefan rushed over and scooped Bonnie up in his arms. Damon's monstrous mask faded then and he lunged from the ground, reaching for the girl he had dispirited. Meredith stepped in front of him and put her hands on his shoulders as Stefan raced down the stairs and into her and Elena's room.
"Meredith, please! I need to talk to her! I can't—" Damon fell to his knees.
Meredith's cold stare softened just the slightest as she watched the skillfully deceptive vampire lose himself. There was no hint of cool confidence, mischievous smirk, or master manipulation. He was simply shattered and he couldn't fit any of his pieces back together.
"I can't lose her..." His voice wavered beneath the weight of his turmoil.
Meredith pulled his face down to hers, "Hey! Take a breath, ok?"
Seeing tears pour from Damon's eyes was one of the worst sights she had ever seen. At one point, she would've given anything for him to cry, to show some emotion other than cockiness. But now she wished that side of him could return. This wasn't a natural look on him, and she hated the mothering part of her that wanted to coddle him and tell him everything would be ok, especially when he just broke Bonnie's poor heart. But seeing him cry was almost as bad as seeing her cry! The strings of her heart pulled just the same.
"Why don't you get out of the house for a bit?"
Damon shook his head and surged forward. She caught him once more, barricading him from making things worse.
"I need to see her!" he insisted.
"Damon! She isn't going to talk to you. Not right now! So if you want to talk to her, you're going to have to give her space first."
His watery midnight crystals searched hers helplessly, silently pleading for her to help him fix this.
"Just go for a while. Please…" Meredith urged and Damon reluctantly sped from her, passed Elena, and out his bedroom window.
Meredith's angry cat-eyes returned as she fixed her gaze on a guilty seeming Elena, still standing in place in the hallway. The blonde nodded, already knowing what Meredith would say next. They walked together into the nearest room, which just so happened to be Bonnie's bathroom.
"Elena…" Meredith sighed exasperatedly, digging her nails into the crown of her head.
Tears brimmed Elena's oceanic eyes, "You know how I feel, Meredith. It's never been a secret."
Meredith's eyes shot open and stared incredulously at her blonde friend, "That doesn't give you rights to Damon, Elena! I understand that you're conflicted, and I know you have feelings for Damon but that doesn't excuse the fact that you just ruined something really good for one of your best friends."
Elena's lower lip quivered and she broke down into her very own set of sobs.
"I didn't mean to kiss him! I was trying to let go! Oh god! Bonnie's never going to speak to me again!" she cried into her hands.
Meredith began to reach her hand up to comfort her best friend, but the mess Elena had just made weighed on her mind. She let her hand fall back to her side.
"I don't think that's true. At least, not if you try to make things right…" Meredith suggested, bending down slightly to try to look Elena in her eyes.
Elena dried her tears, delicately patting beneath her eyes as she sniveled.
"I don't know how."
"I would start by figuring out which brother you really want. You can't have it both ways."
Elena scrunched her face painfully, "I know!"
Her voice fell softer, "…I know."
Meredith searched Elena's face and handed her a tissue from Bonnie's sink, "Do you actually love Damon more than Stefan? Or do you just like the idea of Damon?"
Elena wiped at her slim nose and sniffed, "Stefan's never going to want me after this. He's been so patient, so sweet and kind. And I betrayed him."
Meredith listened intently before speaking firmly, "Yes, you did. I'm not going to sugar coat it for you."
A second wave of tears fell from Elena's eyes. Meredith finally let go of her grudge enough to place a hopeful hand on Elena's shoulder. The sorrowful girl's eyes snapped up to meet hers.
"But Stefan will never not want you, Elena. He loves you. And Damon—"
"He loves Bonnie," Elena nodded in understanding, "I know. I realized after the way he broke down."
She shook her head hard, trying to get rid of unwanted images, "It was a heated moment. It wasn't meant to go that way. I never wanted to hurt anyone. Oh god!"
Meredith shook her lightly, "Hey, hey! No use fretting about it now. It's done. Focus on fixing things, ok? It's all you've got."
Elena took in a wavering, but steadying breath and straightened her shoulders, "I need to talk to Stefan first, mend things if I can. I can't live without him, Meredith."
Meredith offered a small smile, "Then go get him."
Elena nodded, fiddling with the damp tissue in her hands, "And Bonnie…"
Meredith made a whine of protest, "I wouldn't talk to her just yet. Give her some time. And for the love of God, do not talk to Damon! Just don't…ever!"
Elena gave a small chuckle, earning that genuine smile from Meredith that she loved so much.
"I don't plan on it."
Meredith pulled Elena into her and hugged her tight. Elena responded just as enthusiastically, glad to have her friend by her side.
*peaks out between fingers* did I completely wreck you guys' Bamon spirits? I'm super sorry, but let's be real—it was a long time coming. But don't worry, making up is half the fun. ;)
Until next tiiiiime…..