Author's Note:
Hazah! I have not abandoned this one.
I love "Soothe," and it's a good challenge.
Here is Chapter 19!
bobbiejelly
PREVIOUSLY ON "SOOTHE":
"Thank you, Meredith. I think I just might. I'm imagining Doc is smiling at me with his McDog eyes right now," Addison smiles at Meredith."Hey, don't look into MY eyes when you say that, it's weird, you're imagining our puppy!" Meredith exclaims. "I promise I wasn't. I just wanted to joke about you having puppy dog eyes when you pout- because you totally do," offers Addison.
('You're the one with the Ms. McDreamy eyes,' Meredith fights herself not to say this to Addison, now…)
"Thanks," Meredith says shyly, looking down at the bedsheets. "Thanks for asking, Addie."
"About the drowning?" Addison asks her. "About all of it," Meredith takes her hand into hers.
"Did you ever try to end your own life?" Meredith asks Addison, seriously. "No, I didn't."
"You're not lying?" Meredith presses on. "No, I really have never tried or felt the impulse to."
"Thanks for asking, Meredith. Truly, thanks," Addison squeezes Meredith's hand into hers.
"You're welcome. No problem. You did the same for me," Meredith says tenderly. "Thank you."
"You know, this is morbid but I'm comforted by your experiences in the afterlife, about Archie."
"I really hope you don't lose your brother, Archer, but I wish him the best in his old age afterlife". And with that, Addison cuddles in closer next to Meredith and tucks her head into the crook of the smaller woman's neck. "Can I stay here, Mer, in case I have nightmares?" Addison asks Meredith, gesturing so she knows Meredith understands she means the bed. "Of course, Addie" Meredith smiles in acquiescence as she motions to shut off the lights. Meredith feels Addison smile into her sleep as she falls asleep herself in this woman's safe, reassuring, tender, and warm, soothing arms.
END OF FLASHBACK SEQUENCE.
Soothe
In Which Meredith teaches Addison how to self-soothe.
Before Meredith married Derek, and After she'd almost told Addison she liked her.
F/F. Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery. MerAdd. Meddison. GA/PP Fanfiction.
Set during GA - "Before After/An Honest Mistake & PP - Acceptance/Ex-Life. Rated M.
Inspired by "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now" by lespians, "Blame Game" by LordOfLezzies, "All We Ever Are We Are" by SilverStarsAndMoons and "I'll Feel Better When The Headaches Go Away" by StepIsInsanity.
Chapter 19: Hypothetical Hypotenuse
In which hypothetical love may not be dead in the nethers...
1
Meredith Grey wakes up in Addison Montgomery's soothing arms when she can hear her alarm cooing her softly awake with warm music for work. "Mm?" Addison mumbles and Meredith tries to move as little as possible to press 'snooze,' to shut her phone sound off. "I still have a few minutes," Meredith sighs contentedly back into Addison's embrace and Addison holds her there.
Meredith feels all warm and cozy and she's too groggy to question anything right now. Meredith relishes the way Addison has her cheek tucked to her cheek on the side of her face, and how Addison's palms are tucked together around her middle, and how Addison is the perfect size to be her 'big spoon,' with her knees tucked behind her own. "Thanks, Addie," Mer says to her.
"Mm, cozy, Mer," Addison snuggles in harder, not wanting Meredith to go off right away. They stay like this, mostly, because Addison starts stroking Meredith's shoulder and hair and Meredith nuzzles her head up approvingly into Addison's chin. "You like this?" Addison asks Meredith as she curls Meredith's blonde hair into her fingers. "Yes, I do," Meredith admits to Addison, now.
Meredith realizes there's nothing to feel guilty about anymore, and this is platonic and friendly anyway. So Meredith just allows Addison to keep soothing her hair back as she cuddles into her and massages hands with her fingers and thumbs. "I really missed having someone hold me in bed," Addison admits finally, to Meredith. "But you're holding me, now?" Meredith quirks back.
"Only because you're little," Addison chuckles, and you're doing that nice thing with my hands," Addison points out and Meredith keeps going with the thumb circles now that she's sure Addison really likes it. "I missed it, too," Meredith says. "But I thought you and Derek…" Addison trails off as she hears Meredith's breath catch. "Derek never wanted to snuggle," Meredith sighs.
"Oh," Addison says, and Meredith realizes that Addison might have been different with him. "Did Derek used to snuggle you?" Meredith asks Addison curiously. "Only when he wanted something, or when he felt guilty," Addison sighs, not bothering to lie to Meredith to protect their now mutual ex-Derek. "I'm sorry," Meredith says. "I'm sorry, too," Addison says. "Cuddle me!" Meredith insists to Addison. And Addison does.
2
When the snooze button goes off again, Meredith sighs and shuts off the alarm before extricating herself from Addison's grasp. "Do you have to go?" Addison whines a little. "Yeah, work. I had yesterday off, remember?" Meredith says tenderly to Addison. "Okay," Addison says softly. "I'm coming with you, anyway," Addison sighs as she sits up in bed. "For my Archie…"
"Right, Archer," Meredith says tenderly, chiding herself for forgetting about Addison's brother amidst all her relationship drama. "I think he's alright, if he was doing poorly, Derek Shepherd would have told us last night, or Naomi Bennett would have called me," Addison reassures Meredith. "Yeah, I can't believe you're this calm, still," Meredith says as she gets ready.
"Having you around to keep me warm really does help," Addison offers, and Meredith blushes profusely. "I'll order breakfast," Addison says nonchalantly as she pulls out her own phone and announces to Meredith she was right, because her text from Naomi reads 'Archer's cool,' and Meredith laughs at this. "I'll check up on them to make sure they're not naked," Meredith offers.
"Thanks, Meredith," Addison says gratefully. "They are not two people I want to walk in on," Addison grimaces. "Can you please do that for me with my sister Lexie and Mark?" Meredith asks Addison. "Sure, though I don't think me seeing Mark naked in front of his girlfriend would go well," Addison winces. "Right, they'll both be jealous of you," Meredith blurts out too fast.
"You think your sister would have a thing for me, Grey?" Addison blurts out at her previous statement. "Yeah, you're right, we don't have the same tastes because I don't like Mark," Meredith shrugs her shoulders before Addison orders the food and says, "wait, Mer, you never answered me what your type in women was!" In exclamation. "Neither did you, Addie…" Mer replies.
"Are you going to tell me?" Addison asks the other woman, incredulously. "Are you?" Meredith challenges, as she brushes her teeth. "I will if you will?" Addison offers, as she moves to pick out something suitable for Meredith to wear and for her to wear to the hospital. "I'm not sure if I'm ready to know all this information," Meredith stutters as Addison hands her spare scrubs.
3
They eat breakfast in silence, as Meredith and Addison try to avoid looking at each other knowingly about the fact that they just pointedly avoided talking about their own 'types,' in women. "You know," Meredith starts talking. "You said you had a reason not to tell me your type in women and that was Derek, and now I dumped him, SO SPILL, ADDIE!" Meredith pleads her.
"Okay, well, I have a thing for slender blonde women who have talented fingers," Addison says cryptically. "That's really vague," Meredith groans at Addison a bit thickly. "Your turn, we keep going," Addison challenges. "Fine, I like redheaded women, okay?" Meredith grumbles, not meeting Addison's gaze. "I'm not fussy on height, and I like smaller breasts…" Addison adds.
Meredith blushes at the word 'breasts,' and recovers as she explains that "I like rounded curves and a bit of an ass," with a slight smirk. So far, Meredith is trying to keep it together because Addison's type seems to line up with her appearance and she's trying not to get her hopes up while still implying she's interested in someone who is like Addison (well, who IS, Addison…).
"Mm, you do seem to stare at my ass," Addison smirks at Meredith, whose eyes fly open in panic before she settles on a smug grin. "And you, are staring at my chest," Meredith hushes to Addison, who was, in fact, staring at Meredith's chest as her eyes snap back up to Meredith's in alarm. "Mm, like what you see?" Meredith flirts openly with Addison with a wide smirk.
Meredith never thought for the life of her that she would ever be able to actually flirt with Addison Montgomery, much less have Addison flirt back with her. But now her eyes are wide, taking in the sight of Addison biting her lip before telling her, "I do, Meredith. I really do," in a soft tone. "What, really!?" Meredith snaps out of flirtation In exclamation. Mer's shocked at Addie.
"Yeah?" Addison questions at Meredith's shock. "What? You were my competition for Derek for ages back then, I've sized you up in my mind a few times, haven't you?" Addison asks Meredith casually. Meredith's mouth remains agape at Addison's overt admission of 'checking her out,' not only now but since years long past. ('Addison has been staring at me, too,' Meredith thinks).
4
"I never thought someone like you would be interested in someone like me," Meredith just says as she moves to pin up her hair and use some of Addison's makeup on her face. "Someone like me?" Addison asks her to elaborate. "You're just…" Meredith takes a deep breath before beginning her monologue. Meredith realizes that there's no time like the present for confessions...
"You showed up in Seattle, and you were Addison Shepherd," Meredith begins, and Addison bites her tongue at the one. "You were so enchanting, like a queen, and you had all the looks, and all the talent, and all the finesse in the O.R and with the patients, and you stood up for me…" Meredith explains to Addison. "I didn't always," Addison counters. "I fought you for Derek…"
"You were his wife, you had every right to," Meredith shrugs. "I cheated with Mark," Addison reminds her. "He had every right to be angry, though I'll admit his silent departure then creating a love triangle between us was a tad bit annoying," Addison shrugs a bit. "Besides, you're young and whimsical and you have glowing skin, and you're compassionate and passionate and-" Addison starts.
Meredith is taken aback by all of the nice things Addison has to say to her. Meredith has long since started hating Addison, but she has no idea when Addison stopped hating her back. "You know, it's funny, now that we're both openly more than straight, the love triangles all have other possibilities," Addison says with a chuckle. "Huh?" Meredith squints a bit at Addison, then.
"As in, I married Derek, then slept with Mark, then divorced Derek, and you dated Derek, then left him, then took him back, then never married him," Addison summarizes the part they both already know before adding, "and there was always the possibility that you and Mark could date or hook up, but you didn't and you won't probably because Mark's seeing your sister," Addison continues.
"Did you know that Derek almost dated my sister Lexie one time?" Meredith interrupts Addison with this admission. "WHAT?" Addison says, rather shocked. "Yeah, Lexie told me that Derek almost picked her up at the same bar as he did me, once, after we broke up at Burke and Cristina's non-wedding, and Derek hit on Lexie not knowing who she was but she said no," Meredith giggles.
5
"Okay, now THAT, is hysterical," Addison laughs. "Can you imagine if Derek ended up sleeping with Lexie?" Meredith says in a fit of giggles. "Well, to be fair, Mark has slept with every single one of Derek's sisters at some point, already, I believe," Addison offers. "How is Derek still best friends with him?" Meredith blurts out. "I'm not sure he knows, or maybe?" Addison shrugs.
"I'm not sure how I would feel if Cristina slept with Lexie, though that seems unlikely because Lexie really likes Mark, and Cristina texted me that she's in a love triangle with Owen and Owen's ex-wife, Beth, who apparently was a teacher, and Owen broke his engagement with Beth in a two-line email," Meredith offers. "Umm?" Addison asks in question. "Shit," says Meredith.
"You need to forget what I just implied about Cristina please, Addison, because I don't actually know if she's straight or more than that it was all hypothetical," Meredith pleads with Addison. "Of course," Addison orders it, and continues her explanation. "You see, as I was saying, now that there's the potential for gay girl romances, that the hypotenuse of the love triangle can connect."
"As in, which love triangle?" Meredith begs Addison to clarify. "Ours?" Addison replies and smirks when Meredith flushes significantly at the word 'ours,'. "See, before, Derek was the epicenter and we were just the two outlying points of the love triangle, right?" Addison tries to illustrate with her fingers. "So the hypothetical hypotenuse would be you and I," Addison says.
"So, you're saying that because the line between us used to be the furthest away, because we were only connected by Derek who we both were with at some point, but now we're both openly not just straight, so if we were to… Well if we were to-, then it would be the hypotenuse of the metaphorical hypothetical love triangle because it would be the longest line formed?" Meredith rambles.
"Precisely," Addison smiles, congratulating Meredith on her stellar interpretations of geometry. "Whoa, that's a lot of math in the morning, my head hurts," Meredith sighs a bit after the long explanation. "Yeah, thinking of it all makes my head hurt too, sometimes," Addison chuckles, "think of it as more possibilities, I guess?" Addison shrugs. ('I'm a possibility for Addison, now!' Meredith tries not to shout aloud).
6
"If you're hungry, breakfast is here!" Addison says cheerfully as she answers the knock on the door, tips the bellhop, and brings in their first meal of the day. "WAFFLES!" Meredith is immediately distracted by the delightful sight of the platter. "And berries, and whip cream," Addison smiles. "I think Cristina mentioned you liked them," Addison muses aloud for Meredith.
"They even have the real maple syrup," Meredith exclaims as she runs over to join Addison at the table. Addison says "fork," and "knife," as she hands Meredith the cutlery as if she were handing Meredith the surgical instruments. Meredith is grateful that the tricky subject of the 'Addison-Derek-Meredith,' hypothetical hypotenuse love triangle is at least postponed for now.
"Cheers!" Addison offers Meredith a flute of orange juice, sensing that Meredith might want to change gears, for the moment, so to speak about topics. "Cheers!" Meredith says, even though she's not sure what she is cheering for. It feels like a celebration, and Meredith decides that the fact that she's not going to get engaged to Derek Shepherd is enough of one for her, now.
"You know, I never did want to be 'Meredith Shepherd,' Meredith finally admits to Addison. "You know, the only time I ever called myself 'Addison Shepherd,' was that one time for you?" Addison realizes aloud. "Umm, I feel special even though, as I quote, you told me, 'Addison Shepherd… And you must be the woman who's been screwing my husband!' that time,".
"Erm, as I said, I was a bit petty back in those times," Addison apologizes lightly. "Well, I mean I had been screwing your husband," Meredith shrugs. "He didn't tell you, the bastard, and I also pinned your panties to a bulletin board," Addison reminds Meredith, "it was really passive-aggressive," Addison finally admits to Meredith. "I think you might have made Callie happy, though," Meredith laughs.
"Well, for a while," Addison laughs again. "I guess, at that time, Callie claimed the panties were hers, and George was jealous, but then they got married and Callie was Callie O'Malley and then George slept with Izzie and then they divorced and now Callie is a lesbian?" Meredith summarizes. "I'm not sure Callie has given up men, but she does like ladies," Addison laughs with Meredith at all of this.
"Did you actually ask Callie if she was 'Speaking the Vagina Monologues?" Meredith asks.
"I did," Addison laughs. "And then I said I was 'all for it,' after," Addison laughs with Meredith.
"Was that like, your 'coming out' line, but not?" Meredith asks Addison, curiously.
"Probably, or at least I wanted to test the waters with Callie, we were close, we still are," says Addison.
"Is Callie cool with you liking women?" Meredith asks Addison, then says, "and other friends?"
"I don't know if she knows, but it would be hypocritical for her not to be, right?" Addison laughs.
"Probably," Meredith laughs. Addison adds right away that "Naomi knew already, anyway."
"When did you come out to Naomi?" Meredith asks Addison. "College?" Addison shrugs.
"Why did you not come out in Seattle?" Meredith asks Addison. "Why didn't you?" Addison counters.
"I was married to a man anyway," Addison shrugs. "I dated the same man," Meredith shrugs back. And they both giggle again at the irony of that statement. "So we both came out and dumped the same man, Derek, but not necessarily in that order?" Mer asks, and Addie laughs.
***** END OF CHAPTER NINETEEN
Author's Note 2:
Reviewer_Only once described 'hypotenuse shipping,' to me, and that's where all this chapter is inspired from. Thanks.
Well, here's another fluffy and fun one before the two girls head to the hospital.
What will be in store for them, there? Tune in to find out once I figure it out for myself! LOL.
And yes, those were "Weeds," titles, from the Jenji Kohan show.
Apparently I wrote a lot of fanfiction for that show at one point that I hardly remember...
bobbiejelly
Dedications for June 3, 2020, on Chapter 19:
Ao3:
earsdimples, Kristin_Aubrie, Lydialyn, EmyLilas, TheNetflixGal, for commenting on this already.
earsdimples, Darkmatter2001,TheNetflixGal, CPDLS, seattlerain879, I_dont_have_time_for_this, Davedemoneon, lydialyn, Kristin_Aubrie, EmyLilas, tisziny, oliviajames, Hotgitay, and Arissen as well as 8 guests left kudos on this work! Also AddisonAddek, LordOfLezzies, and addiesbaby for being around a bunch.
4 Subscriptions. 506 Hits. 22 Kudos. 13 Comment Threads.
Fanfiction:
No Reviews so far :(. erindanielsx, faith3558, kaipulani, for the Favorites. Kaipulani for the Follow. 1055 Hits.
Wattpad:
steationsurrea, new_being, blackjackthings, itslexipedia, naylorholby, danielaperezsurga, grapesanatomyedits, addiesrep, for commenting and helping me through this process.
Ana_The_Heda who messaged me about 'being addicted to Soothe' which made my entire day. And outlawqueenpercabeth, Eleven_256 who always follows along with the stars!
852 Reads, 120 Stars, 123 Comments, the many people who added this to their readings lists...
This work is really popular here and there was a record-breaking 9 votes on the Chapter 15!
Thanks to all the others who I do not know by name :D… Hope to meet you someday in the Reviews!
HAVE A GREAT DAY!
And of course, other recently updated MerADD stuff to read while you wait for another update:
Bubble
Addison Forbes Montgomery is trapped for 28 days with only Meredith Grey in her house in Seattle. Will they stay enemies? Will they become friends? Will they become 'more than friends'?
Loosely Based on Current Events. MerAdd. Meddison. F/F. Addison Montgomery/Meredith Grey. Rated E for Explicit. Spoilers through GA-S16-E21, PP-S6-E13 (aka now). Fluff, Humor, Romance.
Love The Way You Lie
Derek Shepherd, your husband, hits you- but you stayed until you couldn't stand up anymore. Your best friend Mark Sloan helped you leave him and you two had some adulterous sex. When you see Derek again in Seattle with another woman, all you want is to save her from him. You didn't mean to fall in love with her. She wasn't supposed to fall in love with you, either. But you both did, anyway.
-Addison Forbes Montgomery, for Meredith Grey
MerAdd. Meddison. F/F. Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery. Rated E for Explicit. Grey's Anatomy & Private Practice Crossover.
CW: Domestic Violence. Unhealthy Relationships - Physically & Emotionally Abusive Addek & MerDer. Also briefly okay (non-abusive), Maddison & Mark/Derek.
*This story is entirely fictional. Please seek professional help for abusive relationships in yourself and others. Take all abuse seriously.*
Second Person (The Diary of Addison Montgomery)
You're 'in love' again.
-Addison Montgomery.
As written to herself in her personal diary.
Falling Apart, Barely Breathing
In Which Addison meets Meredith in a bar. Things spiral from there. This is the story about what might have happened after Meredith asks Derek to "Pick Me, Choose Me, Love Me" but before he decides to do anything about it, and after SHE decides to do something about it.
(Oh, and if you wanted to read more about "Addison Montgomery in Handcuffs via Meredith Grey", check out RED is the new BLACK. )
So rest easy, folks, while you wait for the next Chapter of "Soothe".
THANKS FOR READING "SOOTHE," SPEAK WITH ME IN THE COMMENTS? PLEASE :D
Author's Note 3:
Well, that's all for now, folks, unfortunately, I must say.
Thanks of course for reading, I will chat with you soon in the comments.
Much love and yours, truly,
bobbiejelly
bobbiejelly