AN: Thanks for reading and reviewing! This fic got a lot longer than originally planned, but that's how things go sometimes.
"The Pull to the Dark"
By EsmeAmelia
Chapter 18
In the real world, Ben was screaming.
Chewie rushed over to his side, running his paw through Ben's sweat-drenched hair, but that did nothing to alleviate his screams.
"I will awaken him," said one of the medical droids.
[No!] Chewie cried out, holding up his paw. [He needs more time, they all do!]
"He appears to be in distress," the droid continued as if it hadn't heard Chewie. "He could harm himself if he is not awakened!"
Chewie growled at the droid, baring his fangs as if daring the droid to come closer. [Something else could harm him if he is awakened, something you can't cure!]
"Chewbacca, I am programmed to do what I believe is best for my patients."
Chewie gathered the still-screaming Ben into his arms, shielding him from the droid. [And what is best right now is to keep them asleep until they've defeated this thing!]
Ben's head jerked back as another scream emitted from his mouth, his body shaking in Chewie's arms, slamming against his torso and legs. [It's all right, Ben,] Chewie murmured, running his paw through Ben's hair again. [Whatever you're fighting, you're not alone.] His other paw squeezed the dice in Ben's pajama pocket. Lucky dice, Han always called them. Chewie of course didn't believe they were actually lucky, but if there was ever a time when their family needed every bit of luck they could get, now was it.
[Don't give up, Ben. Don't give up.]
. . .
Han lay face down on the concrete floor, his whole body aching, blood oozing from his nostrils, the gashes in his back, the cuts on his hands and face. His ears were buzzing, his head throbbing, it hurt to even think. What was the point of thinking, anyway? Thinking only reminded him of how his parents cared nothing for him and left him to starve in the streets. Hell, maybe they even wanted him to end up as Proxima's scumrat.
Scumrat, scumrat, scumrat, the word repeated itself in his mind as if trying to make his headache worse, as if someone were screaming it into his ears. He let out a long breath, but that made his lungs hurt. Usually he tried to get up after being beaten, but what was the point of getting up?
What was the point of anything?
There was a cloud in his mind, threatening to pull him down into blackness, and he didn't bother to fight it. Let him sink into oblivion. In fact, oblivion was preferable to this.
He slowly, painfully rolled over to his back, his eyes shut, the cloud swirling around in his head. Please, he begged, just let him fade away. His arms flopped to his sides, feeling like weights dragging his body down.
But then his finger brushed something in his pocket. Hard, cube-shaped, familiar.
Ben . . .
The word seemed to whisper through the fog. At first he didn't even remember what it meant, but still it persisted.
Ben . . .
No, no, the word meant nothing, stop, just let him sleep . . .
Ben . . .
It twitched in his head like an insect, refusing to go away, penetrating the fog.
Ben . . .
No . . . stop . . . please . . . go away . . .
Ben . . .
Ben . . .
BEN!
It was like a dam breaking, flooding Han's mind with memories. Escaping the White Worms, meeting Chewie, winning the Falcon, fighting in the Rebellion, marrying Leia, Ben's birth, driving the dark presence out of Ben's mind. Leia, Chewie, Luke, Rey, Ben!
Ben needed him!
He rolled back over to his stomach, pushing himself to his hands and knees, though it made his joins crack and sent fresh waves of pain through his body. "I'm comin', son," he whispered, though it increased the soreness in his dry throat. "Hold on."
Inch by painful inch, he pushed himself up, up, up, until he finally reached a standing position. Though his body wobbled, he gritted his teeth, fighting the swirling in his head. Ben needed him, Ben needed him, Ben needed him!
He broke into a run, not knowing where he was going, but confident that he knew how to get there.
. . .
Ben . . .
The word silently flowed through Leia's mind, piercing through the voices of the Alderaanian dead like a swimmer pushing through the ocean.
Ben . . .
"Ben," Leia whispered back, staring out at the empty space where Alderaan once was, her heart thumping. Suddenly she remembered, this happened decades ago. The dead were still dead, but her son . . .
Her son!
Ben!
With that, Leia broke into a run, jumping through the Death Star's viewport out into space. "Ben, I'm coming!" she shouted, free falling but confident that she would land where she needed to be.
. . .
"Mom!" Rey cried. "Please, talk to Ben . . . Ben . . . wait, Ben!" She blinked as if waking from a dream. Slowly she lowered her head to look at her hands – adult hands.
She wasn't twelve anymore . . . her mother died years ago . . .
This wasn't real . . .
This wasn't real!
"Ben . . ." she repeated. "BEN!"
She bolted out of the room.
. . .
Luke squeezed his dead wife's hand, tears streaming down his face. "I'm sorry, Rianna," he whispered. "I wish . . . I wish I could have done something to stop this. I don't know why I don't have healing skills. If I did, maybe I could have saved you . . ."
He raised her cold, stiff hand to his lips and kissed it, some irrational part of him wishing that his kiss would bring life back to her. How could this have happened? Wasn't there something someone could have done? Something?
Ben . . .
Luke's grip on her hand didn't relax, but the word twitched around in his mind.
Ben . . .
Ben, his nephew still in medical school, who wasn't able to help . . .
Wait, that wasn't right.
Ben graduated medical school.
Years ago . . .
Rianna was still dead, but . . . his family needed him!
Ben needed him.
Luke swallowed. "It's all right, sweetheart," he whispered, kissing his wife's cold head. "Our family is still strong, but right now I need to help them. I know you understand that."
With that, he dropped her hand and rushed out of the hospital, letting the Force guide him to where he needed to be.