Chapter 28 – A Series of Epilogues
Two and a half years later
Hermione was determined to wait for Draco, even though he'd asked her not to. Mainly because she felt guilty for the part she'd played in their breakup. Also, because she was stubborn, and she wanted to prove him wrong. She conceded that Draco may have had a point about the timing being wrong for them right after school. Maybe he did need time to get himself together, to do curse-breaking and find out what he really wanted. Just a week after he left, after reading his letter nearly a hundred times, she decided to fight for him and wait out the entire two years of his assignment for him to come back.
And she did. She focused on her job instead of dating and even went so far as to send Draco a letter each month. But every letter went unanswered, and months passed and he never visited her during any of his breaks, and finally, exactly two years and one day after he'd left, she stopped waiting.
Ron had been dating casually in that time after Hermione told him she wasn't ready to be with him. She was still too much of a coward to tell him about Draco. But that night (two years and one day after her graduation from Hogwarts) they'd been celebrating Neville's new assignment in Hogwarts as Professor Sprout's teaching assistant and they'd had too much to drink. Ron walked her home and she leaned in and gave him a sloppy kiss outside the door to her flat. She was seeking comfort since the months of silence from Draco had left her feeling hollow and alone. Ron's surprised and elated expression after she kissed him had made her laugh.
The next day he'd stopped by with flowers and asked her out, and she finally said yes. Hermione and Ron fell into a comfortable relationship so easily. It was like they truly were meant to be together and she wondered briefly if maybe she had decided wrong all those years ago. She loved his family and she loved him. Ron didn't challenge her intellectually like Draco had, but he challenged her in other ways. He pushed her to take a breath, relax, and enjoy the small things in life. He'd matured in their time apart, and so had she, really. And they were finally ready for each other.
That was why just six months after getting back together they were out at dinner and Hermione knew he had a ring in his pocket. She knew him so well and she was sure that this was the night. But before she let him do this, she had to admit the one secret she'd kept from him for all these years. She couldn't enter an engagement with him without letting him know about Draco, it didn't seem right. Hermione had hoped to tell him before the night but kept losing her nerve, and it was now or never. But they got through dinner and she never admitted her secret and he never asked his question.
They walked around Diagon Alley in the snow after dinner and she figured this was his plan, to propose in the snow. He knew she loved the snow and she was right, because he stopped then and turned to her, looking extremely nervous.
"Ron, I need to tell you something," she blurted out before he could speak.
"Uh, okay," he was disappointed, but let her go.
"I've, uh, well I don't really know how to – I mean I think I know what you're about to ask, and before you do, I need to say that in my last year at Hogwarts I dated Draco Malfoy."
"What? Is this – a joke?" He smiled nervously, then his smile dropped when he saw from her expression that she was telling the truth. "Er – and this was something you had to tell me right now?"
"I can't agree to be engaged to you with this secret between us. It just feels like a lie and if we're to be married-"
"So you knew? This whole time?" Ron looked exasperated.
"Well," Hermione bit her lip, "I've known for weeks."
"Of course you have," Ron rolled his eyes.
"Um, I want to marry you Ron, I love you," Hermione rushed, grabbing his hand in hers, "I just, also wanted you to know, that."
"I –" Ron was at a complete loss for words, then asked, "well when did it end?"
"Graduation," Hermione said quickly.
"So two years ago. And have you two kept in touch or anything?"
"No."
"Do you still love him?" He looked back at her intently, studying her face for her response.
Yes.
She did love Draco, but she wasn't in love with him anymore. She simply knew a part of her would always love him. But in this moment she loved Ron more, and was ready to marry him. She knew he wouldn't understand if she tried to explain this though, so she lied and said, "No."
"Okay, then – well I have a lot of follow-up questions, but can we discuss Malfoy another time please?" he pulled a ring box from inside his robes and knelt on the snowy ground. "This was supposed to be romantic, but you ruined it. But that's what I get for trying to be more clever than you. I hope you'll still agree to be my wife, and make me the happiest, luckiest wizard in the world Hermione Granger."
She squealed and flung her arms around this neck, then he stood and kissed her.
One month later
Draco was back in London, currently picking out a few new (much-needed) pairs of robes. A few weeks ago, he'd been searching for treasure in Asia when Blaise showed up. Draco and Blaise had kept in touch during his entire time away and Blaise had even gone so far as to visit Draco in each exotic country he was stationed. He'd turned out to be quite a good friend, and over the years Draco had confided all of his secrets to Blaise, from each memory from the war to all of the details of he and Hermione's doomed relationship.
When Blaise showed up in the Malaysian jungle he'd marched into Draco's tent and tossed a page of the Daily Prophet onto his bed. "It's time, Draco," he stated while crossing his arms, "You've stayed away long enough."
Draco picked up the paper and tears stung his eyes as he read through the announcement. He touched his finger to the picture of the couple, then nodded back at Blaise. It took him two weeks to wrap up his assignment, then he packed up his limited belongings and headed home.
Blaise had insisted they try the new clothing shop they were in now instead of Madam Malkin's and Draco didn't question it, he just wanted to get his robes and leave. He was uneasy being around so many people after spending the majority of the last few years alone. Draco was looking at a new set of grey robes and was about to pull them off the rack when he heard a familiar voice say, "Draco Malfoy."
He turned and smiled at her, she was just as beautiful as he'd remembered.
"Astoria Greengrass." Well this explained Blaise's insistence on visiting this shop at this exact time. He wondered if Astoria had been in on this "chance meeting" too.
"So you're back."
"It appears so."
"You look loads better than the last time I saw you."
Draco smirked, he was sure that was true. He wasn't being forced to live through war memories anymore and was finally able to sleep through the night. He'd also grown more self-assured by working through curse-breaking and saving himself from a few near-death experiences. He'd finally cracked the code behind Potter's understated confidence, surviving situations that should have killed him. "Well you look the same, which is a good thing," Draco added.
"Astoria! Fancy seeing you here," Blaise joined them then.
Astoria crossed her arms, "You asked me to meet you here today."
"Shhhhh," Blaise made to put a finger to her lips but she wiggled out of his grip and Draco just shook his head at the two of them.
"Well we're going to lunch," Blaise continued, "if you want to join."
She shrugged and rolled her eyes, "You are so obvious."
"Subtlety was never my thing," Blaise looked back at Draco. "What do you say? Invite the lady to lunch, she won't come unless you agree."
Astoria blushed and Draco said casually, "Sure, why not? You're already here."
Draco purchased a few sets of robes and soon after they were eating at a nearby café. Astoria told him about her administrative job at St. Mungo's and Draco shared some of his more interesting curse-breaking stories. At the end of lunch Blaise left quickly and Draco walked Astoria to the next stop on her shopping trip, Flourish and Blotts. She stopped him when they were halfway down the street and said out of nowhere, "I saw Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley are getting married."
"I saw that too," Draco said as indifferently as he could manage.
"Is that why you're back?"
"Why would you think that?"
"You've been gone for almost three years, now suddenly, you're back. Just weeks after they announced their engagement."
"Hmmm," Draco said noncommittally.
"Do you still love her?"
"Yes," Draco answered automatically and watched in amusement as Astoria's eyes widened. He continued, "Not like you're thinking though, in a way where I'm pining for her and am planning to break up her engagement. Just, a part of me will always love her, she really helped me get through some dark stuff that last year at school."
Astoria nodded thoughtfully, "Yeah, I think I saw a small part of that."
They walked in silence the rest of the way to the store. When they got to Flourish and Blotts Draco was about to tell her goodbye when she said, "So how many more times am I going to have to bat my eyes before you ask me out?"
Draco was stunned, "You want to date an ex-Death Eater who just admitted he's still in love with a muggle-born?"
Astoria smirked back at him, "Yes. As long as you want to date a defected pureblood elitist who is completely estranged from her parents."
Draco shook his head, then said, "I think I'd like that."
After Draco dropped Astoria off at the shop he turned back the way he'd come, meaning to stop by the Apothecary before heading home. He made it two blocks before he was pulled into an abandoned alley. His eyes widened in shock as he saw that his captor was none other than Hermione Granger.
She looked back at him angrily, then said, "You never returned my letters. Did you even read them?"
Draco nodded back at her, unable to speak.
"I waited for you, like I said I would."
Draco kept staring at her, drinking her in. She looked the same, but a little different. Her hair was shorter, still wild, and her eyes were sadder, but maybe that was just because she was talking to him.
"Then I got tired of waiting," she continued, "And, well, I guess you're back now. Convenient timing."
Draco looked over at the ring on her finger. He was still at a loss for words. He wanted to scoop her up and kiss her. He focused on the feeling of his feet on the ground, like he used to do when using Occlumency. Staying grounded was good, also breathing. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale.
"Say something," she pressed, crossing her arms.
Words, use words. Say some words. So he blurted out the words that were always at the top of his mind, "I love you Hermione Granger."
Hermione was shocked. Those words seemed to be the last ones she was expecting him to say. She swallowed hard, then glared back at him. Draco realized after a few minutes that she was using his own silent tactic on him. He wondered if he'd cave first. Under normal circumstances, no, but he owed her more. But he was a coward. Now just as ever, he'd never be mistaken for a Gryffindor.
"Are you here to win me back or something?" She was getting right to the point, bold as ever. She was so much better than he was.
Yes! His mind screamed. I was an idiot and I love you! Take me back!
But Draco didn't speak. He'd waited for her to move on before coming back. He wanted her to stop waiting for him, and she finally had. Now what was he going to do? Get in the way of her happiness? She looked content, rested, beautiful. Who was he to interfere in her life? He was a little better than the shattered wizard from before but would still never be good enough for her. She deserved the man who had fought for her, not the one who'd run away.
"No," he said eventually. "You still deserve better than me. I just – wanted you to know that I still love you."
Hermione's eyes were sad and she dropped them, and he saw a tear fall to the ground. Draco watched its descent and when it broke on the stone he felt his insides shatter in turn. When she looked back at him her eyes were glossy, but it seemed she only had one tear to shed for him. He figured it was all he was probably worth.
"You're wrong Draco," Hermione said defiantly. "You aren't less than me, and you deserve happiness just like I do. And I know a lot of it was my fault, I know I should have told everyone we were dating. And I should have picked you sooner, but I tried to make it up to you, I tried to fight," her voice broke and Draco's insides turned.
"But I do deserve better than you. Not because of who you were, and how you were raised, or the part you played in the war. But I deserve someone who will fight for me too. Even now, you say you love me, but you won't fight." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, as if holding back tears. He wanted to reach for her more than anything but kept his hands at his side.
Hermione turned to leave then, "Good luck Draco, I'm glad you made it back safe."
Draco couldn't let her go, not like this. "Hermione – " he called out to her and took a step closer.
She turned her head, but not her whole body, so he could only see the side of her face. That was probably for the best, he didn't think he'd have the courage to say this while looking into her eyes. "Would it make a difference? If I fought?"
Hermione stood there for a long time, her body still turned away from Draco. She kept her gaze on the wall ahead of her. It felt like her heart had stopped beating, though she knew that wasn't possible.
Would it make a difference? If I fought?
Draco's words had caused a torrent of thoughts and emotions in her brain. She was back to those weeks almost three years ago, when she'd agonized over Draco versus Ron. She wanted Draco, even now, just as much as she wanted him then, but he couldn't seem to step up and be the man she needed him to be. She'd thought maybe he'd finally become that person when she saw him with Astoria and Blaise at the café. He'd seemed mature, at ease, and confident. She'd been so alarmed by the change in his appearance that she'd stayed glued to the spot and watched him for over an hour. He was laughing easily and looked healed and content. This was the Draco she'd waited for. This was why she'd followed him as he walked Astoria down the street and this was why she'd pulled him into this alley.
But in just the few minutes they'd been alone together she'd watched him revert back to the broken Draco from Hogwarts. Maybe he would always turn into this broken man with her. She turned toward him and asked, "What would you do if I said yes? Would you fight for me Draco, if I asked?"
He completely fell apart in front of her, and she was reminded of that day he'd come into her room half-mad, memories flashing unbidden before his eyes. This was the Draco he would always be with her, and they both deserved better. "I would do anything for you Hermione," he said weakly, and she could hear the sob in his throat. Then she saw a flash of shadows dart across his eyes.
He'd told her once he relived the memory of her being tortured in his drawing room more than any other. And by the way he was looking at her now she knew that was the memory he'd just seen. She closed the distance between them and asked, "You're still seeing flashbacks?"
Draco shook his head, then looked at the ground, "I hadn't, for over a year. It must just be, being back here." He didn't add the words they were both thinking, with you.
Then Hermione finally saw clearly what he'd been trying to articulate years ago. But she'd misunderstood. She thought when he said the war would always be between them, he was referring to her and her inability to look past who he'd been. But he was talking about himself. He was the one who would never be able to get past it.
Maybe it was the timing of when they became friends, so soon after the final battle. Or maybe it was how they got together, clouded by his deception of looking for the Elder Wand. Or maybe it was her reluctance to go public. Or maybe it was just the fact that she was the muggle-born he'd hated first. Maybe, maybe, maybe. The reason didn't matter anymore. Either way, Draco wouldn't be able to fully heal with her around.
"I'm sorry Draco," she said in a soft voice and he gave her an intense gaze that took her breath away and she almost changed her mind then. Almost. "But you deserve better too and with us, there will always be too much standing in the way," Hermione paused and sobbed, then continued.
"When I look at you, I'm always going to see the strong, powerful, confident man you could be if you would just let your past go. And when you look at me, you'll always see the girl getting tortured in the drawing room who you didn't help. But neither of those are real, are they?"
"We always struggled with reality," Draco muttered, his voice breaking.
"I love you too Draco, but I don't think, for us, that's going to be enough." Tears were streaming down both of their faces now and he leaned his forehead down and placed it against hers. Then his hand was on her arm and she could feel it trembling.
"Maybe in a different life, we could have figured this out Draco."
He nodded, his features wrought with anguish, then eventually said, "Goodbye Hermione." She turned away from him then and walked back to the busy street. And summoning every ounce of strength in his body, Draco kept his ground, and let her go.
Sixteen years later
Hermione twirled her finger along the edge of the glass, staring at the water to avoid having to look back at Harry's intense stare. "It sounds like you're already giving up, like you're not even going to give these counseling sessions a shot," he was saying.
She looked back at him then, feeling defensive suddenly. This is exactly what she hadn't wanted to happen with all of this, for Harry to feel like he had to pick a side. She didn't want there to be any sides.
"I am Harry, I'm going, and I do all of the homework," they both paused and smirked at each other, "I just – know my heart. And I know his too. I think it's over. And I want to make sure we don't wait too long to end it. We still love and respect each other now. If it drags on…" she trailed off, not wanting to think of what a hostile divorce from Ron would look like. She was so entwined with his family and the kids… no, she would not let it get to that.
"If you still love him then why can't you try-" Harry started in again and Hermione cut him off, "Harry, you're not listening to me."
He looked back at her sadly. Out of everyone they'd told, Harry had taken the news of her and Ron's marital problems the hardest. She sighed, "I do love Ron. He's an amazing father, a loyal friend, and I'm so proud of how far he's come professionally. But I feel like I've extracted every ounce of fulfillment and happiness I can from our marriage. I'm just - ready for more. And I can tell he feels the same."
Harry shook his head, but she saw him relax a little in his chair. Like he was finally giving in a bit, she hoped. "What do you want me to do then?"
"Just talk to him. Please?"
"Why can't you?"
"I do, but it would be good to hear it from more people. He's stubborn but if he really considered the past few years, I think he'll see that this isn't one-sided. And if we drag this on for too long…" she trailed off and looked back at the water in her glass.
After a time, Harry sighed, "I understand. I'll try."
"Thanks Harry."
"How is Rose feeling about tomorrow?" They were both relieved by the change in subject.
"Terrified, but hiding it well. And Albus?"
"Same."
Hermione stood then and finished the rest of her water, "Well, I should get back. I'll see you tomorrow at the station. Thanks Harry."
Harry stood and gave her a longer hug than normal, then walked her to the door.
"One year, two at the most."
Draco's chest constricted and he felt a hand touch his leg as he tried to refocus on the healer. He couldn't take this anymore. He stood then and rushed outside and started walking up and down the street, blinking back the tears that were forming in his eyes.
Shit, shit, shit. Why was he acting like a child? He should go back and comfort Astoria, she was the one who should be acting out, but she'd behaved calmly through this whole ordeal. He took a deep breath and settled against the wall.
Astoria had told Draco about her blood curse just a few weeks after they'd started dating. He hadn't cared, he'd actually been a little relieved. His healer thought it was because he was able to view her as damaged, like he viewed himself. His healer thought that was one of the reasons Draco had been able to accept Astoria's love, but not Hermione's. Draco admitted that there might be truth to that, but he hated to think of his wife as damaged. She was lovely, and kind, and strong, and funny, and a brilliant mother. And he was going to be completely lost without her.
"We knew it was a long shot," he jumped and turned to find Astoria leaning on the wall behind him, her eyes filled with concern. He pulled her into his chest and she melted into him. He tightened his arms around her and let a few tears fall from his eyes.
"We have to tell Scorpius," she said into his chest, "I know the timing is bad, with him starting school tomorrow, but it'll be better to give him time to come to terms with it all."
Draco took a few deep breaths, trying to clear the sobs that were forming in his chest. "You're right. We'll tell him tonight."
She pulled back and looked at him, then wiped the tears from his face, "And the war? Are you going to tell him about that too?"
Draco nodded, suddenly feeling very bad for Scorpius and the difficult conversations he'd have to endure tonight. He was so young, but they'd waited as long as they could. Astoria was right, the sooner they told him about her condition the better. And the war, well there was never a good time for a boy to hear that his father had fought on the side of the mass murderer during the war, but he definitely didn't want him to hear it first at Hogwarts.
"Look who it is," Ron said darkly, looking over at three figures standing at the other end of the platform.
Hermione looked over and her heart dropped when she recognized Draco and Astoria with a young son who looked very much like Draco had at that age. Draco caught sight of the group staring at him and gave them all a curt nod before turning away.
Hermione allowed herself to breathe again. She'd seen him around, of course, their world was small, but her reaction was always like this. He literally took her breath away. She wondered if it was the same for him. She hadn't spoken to him since that day in the alley years ago. She heard Ron whispering to Rose, "Make sure you beat him in every test, Rosie. Thank God you inherited your mother's brains."
"Ron, for heaven's sake," Hermione said in a stern voice, "Don't try to turn them against each other before they've even started school!"
"You're right, sorry," Ron said, but his expression was nasty and he looked very not sorry. Then he added, "Don't get too friendly with him though, Rosie," at this he gave Hermione a dark look, "Granddad Weasley would never forgive you if you married a pureblood."
Hermione rolled her eyes, then Rose went to greet James who had just appeared with some news. She gave Ron one last accusatory look before turning to see what James wanted to say.
She wondered if Ron would bring this up in their counseling session today. Tell the story of how she'd ruined his marriage proposal by bringing up her relationship with his school rival. She shook her head. No, that wasn't fair, he had never been cruel to her. They were both just on edge about sending Rose off to school for the first time and taking it out on each other today. Even healthy couples did that.
She bent to give Rose a final hug before she climbed onto the train, then watched the train start up and make its way down the track. Hermione felt a pang in her chest as she remembered her first train ride. She'd been so nervous, sure they'd kick her out as soon as she got there, that there had been some mistake. She thought of how far she'd come since and couldn't help but smile to herself. She was way more confident than that scared, bossy girl. When the train disappeared out of sight, she turned back to look at Ron.
He gave her a small smile and she wondered if he was thinking of that same day. The day he'd met Harry Potter, it had surely changed his whole life. He leaned over and gave her a small, forced kiss on the cheek then and said he'd see her in their session later that afternoon.
He and Harry left to go back to work and she and Ginny had planned to take the younger kids for ice cream to cheer them up since they were sad about being left behind.
Ginny was staring at something behind Hermione and she turned to look and spotted Draco sitting alone on a bench at the other end of the platform. The other parents were Disapparating around them and after a few minutes the only people left were she, Ginny, the kids, and Draco. Hermione stepped toward him, instinctively, then caught herself. She couldn't go talk to him now, she had plans with Ginny and the kids. She looked back at Ginny who was watching her with a sad look. Then the two of them shared a silent conversation spoken only with facial expressions.
Please Ginny, I haven't seen him in so long, I just want to say hi.
You are married!
So is he, it's not like that. We used to be good friends.
Fine, I'll take the kids, meet up with us soon.
Thanks!
Ginny huffed, then said to the kids, "Come with me, Aunt Hermione with catch up." Hugo and Lily didn't care, ice cream was the only thing on their minds right now. Ginny walked with them to the entrance to the platform then turned back to Hermione and whispered, "I know things have been strained, but you are still married."
For now, Hermione thought, but all she said was, "I know, it's not like that. I'll catch up with you soon."
Hermione walked slowly over to the bench and sat down next to Draco. He didn't look up, just continued looking out at the tracks.
"Hi," she said lamely and he responded after a while with, "Hi."
She wasn't sure what to say now and was second-guessing her decision to come over here. She started fiddling with her necklace, then noticed that he was watching her and was staring at the necklace she was wearing. It was the one he'd given her almost twenty years ago.
"Oh," Hermione said, "I wore it today, because, well, in honor of Rose starting Hogwarts." She looked down at it and the tiny lion roared. "The animals still move."
He laughed to himself and said, "They better, they cost a fortune."
She smiled, then asked, "Is your son starting this year?"
Draco nodded and she pressed, "Is he scared?"
Draco went back to watching the tracks, then said, "I think so, but I'm probably more scared. I'm worried – well, we'll see how he's treated, for what I did." He sighed, and started rubbing the spot on his arm where his Dark Mark had been.
"He's been mostly shielded from the details of the war. I had to tell him more than I'd ever intended though, last night, just so he didn't hear first from some bully that his father tried to kill his headmaster and a few fellow classmates."
"Well I can guarantee he won't get that treatment from anyone in my family," Hermione said confidently.
"Well that's good, that covers off on half the school population, I think," he teased.
She rolled her eyes. Then said, "Rose was scared, but she didn't want to admit it. I used the dream spell last night, and walked her around the castle, at least how I remembered it. I always think of you when I use it, my kids love it."
He gave her a sad smile, "I don't use it anymore, too worried about setting off another mental breakdown."
They both laughed awkwardly, then she said a little boldly, "Let me take you somewhere then."
He shook his head, "You don't have to."
"I want to, if for no other reason than as a thank you for introducing me to such a lovely spell. Where do you want to go Draco?"
Draco's mind was drawn to the last time someone had asked him this. It was his mother, the day before he'd left on his curse-breaking assignment. His answer now was the same as it had been then. Except this time he spoke it out loud, "Seventh floor, east wing, behind the portrait of two dragons."
Hermione's eyes widened and she hesitated, and he thought she wouldn't do it, but soon they were there, and they were their younger, 19-year-old selves. They stood in front of the window seat facing each other. They stared more openly than they dared to at the station and drank each other in. Draco raised a hand to her cheek and brushed it with his fingertips and she leaned into his touch.
Hermione let herself stay there for ten seconds. That was all she'd allow.
Ten…nine… Hermione's heart was beating hard and fast in her chest and she wondered if Draco's was too.
Eight…seven…six… Draco's grey eyes were boring into her own and the expression there was intense, but otherwise unreadable.
Five…four…three… His lips turned up slightly and she wondered what he was thinking.
Two…one. Hermione grabbed his wrist and gently pulled his hand away, "We shouldn't," he pulled his hand out of her grasp then, "not even in here," she added and he nodded back in response as she dropped the dream spell.
They were back on the platform and sat in silence for a while, not looking at each other. Then Hermione said softly, "I was so convinced we both deserved a happy ending. That had to be how our story ended. But it did, didn't it? We got our happy endings, just not – together."
"Are you happy Hermione?" Draco asked then, turning to look at her.
No. She had been, for years. But something had shifted recently, and she felt lost. She lied, "Of course, are you?"
Draco nodded, but his eyes were devastated.
"You're lying," she said.
"So are you," his eyes narrowed, "but I didn't push."
Hermione dropped her eyes, suddenly feeling guilty. He had a point, she didn't have a right to question him like that, they weren't close anymore. But Draco went on to explain about Astoria's blood curse and how they'd exhausted all of their options and had just found out she had only one or two years left to live.
"I think it's my punishment for my part in the war."
"What?"
"Abbreviated time with the women I love. First you, now Astoria," he dipped his face in his hand and Hermione refrained from placing a comforting hand on his back, like she wanted to. "But it's not the worst punishment," he continued, "The limited time with her, both of you, I think it was worth it. And I have Scorpius now. So when she does leave, I won't be alone."
Hermione's heart broke and she could tell he was struggling to hold it together. Draco pulled out his pocket watch to check the time. She saw a glint of copper, then grabbed the watch out of his hand. "You still have it," she whispered, recognizing the penny she'd made him pick up on his 19th birthday stuck on the inside of the watch.
"You told me to keep it forever."
"I remember amending that," she said. Then they looked at each other awkwardly, both remembering that conversation and what he'd said.
I'll keep it as long as I love you.
He dropped his eyes, and she put a soft hand on his arm.
"After all this time, Draco?"
"As long as I can dream, Hermione." He gave her an intense stare without a hint of shame or embarrassment, and she matched it, feeling a twinge of longing rise in her chest.
"But Astoria," she whispered and he shifted away from Hermione.
He was annoyed and offended, "I can love more then one person, and I'd never act on it Granger. I should go," Draco reached out for the watch that Hermione was still holding.
"Right," she handed it back to him and stood up, straightening her skirt.
He was standing watching her, and his previous annoyance had passed. Now he was just smiling to himself. Mercurial Malfoy is back, she thought. She wanted to hug him, but knew that was probably inappropriate, especially given his admission and her own lingering feelings that had unexpectedly risen to the surface today. She held out her hand instead.
He looked at it questioningly, then smirked and grabbed it firmly.
"I'll see you around, Malfoy. It was good talking to you again."
"You too Granger."
"It's Granger-Weasley," she corrected.
"Maybe in this life," he said cryptically, and they both stared into each other's eyes, each aching for what could have been in another time, or another life, before they broke contact and Disapparated.
Three years later
Once the platform had emptied Hermione made her way to the bench Draco was sitting on. Meeting up after the Hogwarts Express left had become their tradition, since that first day she and Draco had talked after sending their kids off to Hogwarts for the first time.
The second year Hermione had looked over expectantly and seen both Draco and Astoria lingering on the same bench. She'd been about to leave when Astoria had waved her over. Hermione thought Astoria meant to scold her. For longing for a dying woman's husband and daring to spend that time last year alone with Draco. But when Hermione reached the bench Astoria was smiling and greeted Hermione with a hug. Hermione was alarmed by how thin she felt and how utterly exhausted she looked.
The three of them spent the next two hours catching up. Draco and Astoria were good together, and Hermione felt a pang in her chest at the irony that this couple, who clearly still loved each other, would be separated by a blood curse while she and Ron, who were perfectly healthy, were being separated by a lack of love.
She'd been reluctant to leave that day, and was still surprised that Astoria hadn't minded her coming over, especially since she seemed to suspect a little of Hermione's lingering feelings toward Draco. But Hermione had an appointment at the ministry that day, to finalize her divorce to Ron, though she didn't tell Draco and Astoria her reason for leaving at the time. Her divorce was heavily publicized a few weeks later and she couldn't help but wonder what Draco had thought when he read about it.
The next year, the first year Hugo went to Hogwarts, Draco was alone on the bench. Astoria had passed away just one month before. Hermione had approached warily, then taken the seat beside him when he didn't protest. Draco was completely still, and she'd asked if he wanted her to leave. He shook his head, then told her he'd appreciate the silent company, if she didn't mind. She sat with him for an hour before he finally got up to leave. She placed a comforting hand on his arm in silent farewell and he smiled sadly back at her, then left her alone.
Today Hermione didn't know what to expect as she approached him. Draco gave her a smirk when he saw her walking toward him and she was brought back to when they were young. Before she could sit, he stood, then reached his hand out to her, "Come on, let's go for lunch."
Hermione hesitated, but she wasn't sure why. She'd been coming here to talk to him, hadn't she? Why couldn't they do so while eating? But would it look odd if anyone saw them? She was single, had been for years, and his wife was dead a year ago. But this wasn't a romantic request anyway, surely not –
He cut into her thoughts. "You're overthinking this, Granger."
"Am not," she argued back.
"Oh you most surely are. Wondering if this is romantic, if anyone will see, what people will think. Am I over my departed wife? Are you over your ex-husband? What about our kids?"
"I hadn't gotten to the part with the kids yet," Hermione admitted, crossing her arms and blushing slightly. His hand was still held out to her but she just glared at it.
"Hermione," his voice was gentle and she shifted her gaze to his grey eyes. They were soft, but intense. "Let me put your mind at ease. This is a date. Now can you give me your hand so I can Apparate us there?"
Hermione stepped back, surprised and confused, and a little scared too. "You just assume I'm going to go on a date with you? After everything?"
Draco smirked again and took his hand back so he could cross his arms, matching Hermione's pose, "Of course you are."
"And how do you know that?"
Draco dropped his arms and stepped close to her, "Because you love me."
Hermione lifted her head to look at him, shaking her head, "You're so convinced I still love you? Why?"
"I didn't say 'still,' I think 'finally' is probably the better word."
Hermione was confused, then he explained, "Hermione, I left because you saw me as this impossible person who I didn't think I could be. Confident, healed, unburdened. And you saw him every time you forgave me, but you never really loved the broken wizard I actually was. Astoria did," he added sadly and his eyes darkened briefly.
I did too! You just couldn't accept it from me, because of your guilt. Hermione didn't argue though, it was too late for that anyway. Instead she asked, "What are you saying?"
Draco smiled at her then and the image took her breath away, "I got there. It took me, what? 21 years? It took losing you, falling out with my parents, loving and losing Astoria, raising a child, and countless healer appointments. But I'm him, finally, the man you fell in love with." He was smiling widely now, "And I'd like to take you, Hermione Granger, the woman I fell in love with and have never stopped loving, on a date."
He stepped back and held his hand out for her again. Hermione's heart was beating hard and she watched him closely. Then, slowly, she put her hand in his. His fingers closed instinctively around hers, and she noticed their hands fit perfectly, as if the 20 years apart had never happened. She saw a glint of triumph and anticipation cross his eyes before he apparated them away.
Draco and Hermione's date lasted six hours. They spent the first two hours moving food around on their plates at a nearby muggle restaurant. They were so busy talking that they never got around to eating. Then they'd moved on to tea at a cafe once the waitress at the restaurant finally kicked them out to make room for more customers. After tea they started wandering around the city, neither of them ready to part ways. They had a lot to catch up on, but Draco reasoned there was plenty of time for that. They had nothing but time now, especially since all of their children were at Hogwarts.
Draco had thought this first lunch between them would feel strange, and that it would take time for him to open up to her again, especially so soon after Astoria's death. But that hadn't been the case at all, and he was sure Astoria would approve. He knew it wasn't for nothing that she'd invited Hermione to talk to them on the platform two years ago. And in her last weeks, she'd urged Draco not to wait too long after her death to move on, worried he'd "miss his chance to be with someone great for him if he didn't act quickly enough." That statement hadn't been hard to decode.
Draco knew there was room in his heart for both women. He'd loved Hermione all these years but had never let that unrequited love take away from the affection he felt for his wife. He guessed in a way the heart expands to accommodate more people, just as it had when Scorpius was born. Draco never suspected in his youth that he'd become an expert on matters of the heart, but here he was.
He was walking her back to her flat now and Hermione was talking about her parents and explaining the efforts she'd taken to heal that fractured relationship. She'd done most of the talking today, as always, but he didn't mind. He loved listening to her. And she seemed like she'd been missing having someone listen to her for years.
They climbed the stairs to her flat and finally arrived at a dark green door. "This is me," she said awkwardly.
Draco froze in place. Should he kiss her? He wanted to, but he didn't know if that would be too fast. Why did he suddenly feel like a nervous teenager again? Hermione was looking back at him expectantly, then a hint of amusement glittered in her eye and it gave him the courage to lean in and place a chaste kiss on her lips. When he pulled away, she grabbed his collar and kept him in place, then kissed him more thoroughly. Hermione Granger had always been thorough, one of the many things he loved about her.
She gave him a small smile, then unlocked her door and stepped inside. "See you around," she said softly, before turning and closing the door behind her. Draco turned to leave, smiling to himself and wondering how long he'd wait to owl her (maybe 2 minutes after he got home) when he heard the door click open behind him, "Draco."
He turned back and waited for her to continue, "Do you think inviting a man into my flat after just one date would make me a slag?"
Draco smirked, then made his way back down the hall, stopping to lean against the wall when he was several feet from her, "Absolutely. But I feel inclined to point out that this isn't our first date, it's technically our third."
Hermione nodded seriously, moving her fingers along the edge of the door, "That's certainly a more respectable amount of time to wait before inviting someone in."
"But I need to warn you," Draco slunk closer to her, "If you invite me in, I'll probably never leave."
Hermione looked back at him with an unreadable expression, then a seductive smile came across her face, "Well in that case…" she pushed the door open then.
Draco didn't waste any time. He rushed toward her and picked her up, then walked them both through the doorway, kissing her ardently. "I love you," she muttered between kisses, tightening her arms around his neck.
"I told you so," he responded.
She pushed back and he kept a firm grip on her, "You're obnoxious, why can't you just say you love me too?"
"Why do you always have to be so critical?" he countered.
"Prat."
"Are you done? I'm not a teenager anymore, so I'm not going to be able to stand here holding you for much longer."
She smiled then and tightened her legs around his waist, then resumed kissing him as he walked the rest of the way into her flat, slamming the door hard behind them.
A/N: If I wasn't super awkward and could write a smut scene, it would go right here...
This is the first story of any length I've ever written. It was terrifying posting each and every chapter (most of all the one with Draco's memories, then secondly this one) but all of your support made it worth it and helped me power through. Thank you for reading!
When I set out to write this, I wanted to write the characters as realistically as possible and I wanted it set during their eighth year. I intended for them to end up together following school, but about 2/3 the way through I realized they couldn't (not the way I'd written them at least). Then I tweaked the story a bit to get it to fit with the Epilogue from the original HP series, and I kind of like the idea of a Dramione romantic interlude that fits in with canon. But of course, I still needed to add an HEA, so they got it, just a bit delayed.
I was kind of disappointed they had to spend 20 years apart in this story, so I am writing another story where they meet a little later after the war, after Draco has had a chance to work through some of his issues on his own. I think this would give these two characters a better shot at ending up together to start. That story is in process now and I'll probably start posting it in a few months.
Thanks again for sticking with it, please leave a comment and let me know what you think.