Chapter 21

BPOV

When I woke up, Paul was fast asleep next to me, and I lay there, staring at the ceiling.

I hadn't slept well. Interspersed in my dreams had been some weird shit, that was all distortion and chaos, probably aftereffects of my trip…and I'd dreamt of Edward, Charlie, Renee, and…Ella.

My chest constricted at the thought of her.

Poor Edward. His whole world had literally fallen apart, and I…

He hated me now, but I deserved it. How could I not recognise my childhood best friend? He was living with this huge thing…and I didn't know.

It explained everything about his behaviour towards me too, he was pissed at me for not recognising him, but that was all, he was going to forgive me for it. He probably thought I was a huge bitch for not saying anything about his mom when I first found out it was him, but…he wanted to talk….I guess he was expecting me to…

Fuck.

Then I'd asked him, fucking stupidly asked him because I didn't know.

Of course he didn't believe me, my fucking parents knew.

It was my fault for cutting everyone off from Forks too, if I'd just kept in contact with someone. Maybe I'd have found out…

My head spun in circles of what if's and a deep ache set into my chest, I couldn't believe Renee knew and didn't tell me.

It was unbearable.

I didn't want to see her, I didn't want to be there, I hated her. How could she not tell me? How could she not fucking tell me?

I sighed in anger and frustration, my eyes filling with tears.

I glanced to my left and Paul was staring at me, his deep brown eyes full of concern.

His thumb caught the tear that spilled from my eye and ran down my cheek and he moved closer, pulling me into his chest and hugging me, placing a kiss on my head.

I snuggled into him, but my chest still ached and being in his arms was…confusing.

Probably because I kissed him.

More than once…

I pushed the memory out of my head, the kissing was…I couldn't think about that right now.

'How are you feeling?' His voice was thick and throaty with sleep.

'I'm…' I stopped before saying the word fine because it's crap and he knows it.

'Do you still want to go to school?'

'Yeah.' I breathed. 'Oh! I should call Jasper, he's on his way to the competition.'

Paul's body stiffened for a brief moment and I frowned at him before extricating myself from his arms, grabbing my phone from the bedside table.

'I'm gonna go make some coffee.' Paul said, sitting up and yawning, revealing his half naked body.

My eyes flicked down his muscled chest and arms, lingering on the ridges in his stomach. He wasn't as lean as Jasper but his muscles were bigger. I bit my lip as I remembered how it felt to touch him, how his body felt against mine… When I'd kissed him last night I'd felt…

He stood up and I looked away sharply.

Jasper answered the call straight away and I smiled at the sound of his easy drawl.

'Good mornin' darlin'.'

'Morning.' I said, crossing my legs and sitting up in the bed. 'How are you feeling? Are you almost there?'

'Yep we'll be there in about 30.' I could hear the grin in his voice. 'I feel confident, ready. I've done the training, just got to deliver now.'

'You'll be amazing.' I told him, playing with the duvet cover.

'How are you baby?' Jasper's voice went quieter, 'How's the comedown?'

I sighed softly. 'I'm fine don't worry.'

There was a brief pause. Jasper didn't buy my shit any more than Paul did but he didn't tend to call me out on it.

I hadn't told him why I took the drugs yet, even though I'd told Paul. It was different with Jasper, harder somehow.

I just…couldn't. Plus, he'd been kind of distracted and kind of…absent.

I remembered bits and pieces of being high, but the only constant was Paul, and Jasper had left.

I knew why, it was just…it hurt.

We talked a little more but hearing his voice just made me miss him. I felt like I hadn't spent much time with him the past week.

'Jas…' I said softly.

'Yeah darlin'?' He asked.

'Just…good luck. I…I know you'll do great.'

'Thanks beautiful. Shit, I've gotta go, apparently coach wants to do a pep talk.' He gagged and I laughed softly.

'Okay call me aft-.'

He hung up.

I found a gigantic band T-shirt of Paul's that went down to my mid thigh and pulled a pair of his black boxers on, so that if I flashed accidentally it would look like I was wearing shorts underneath.

I was just brushing my hair with Paul's shit excuse for a hairbrush when he opened the bedroom door, holding a cup of coffee in his hand.

His eyes flicked down my body and he swallowed. 'Oh. You're wearing my clothes?'

I bit my lip. 'I don't have anything else. Is that okay?'

Paul's eyes darkened a little and his jaw twitched. 'Yeah.' He said throatily.

'Does it look okay?' I asked frowning at him, his face was hard to read.

He laughed softly, shaking his head. 'It looks fine Bella.'

I looked in the mirror and frowned.

Fine.

I didn't want to look fine.

It was bad enough I didn't have any makeup.

Paul sighed softly and handed me the mug of coffee, a rush of heat going through me as his fingers brushed mine.

'Well should I find something else?' I asked him, feeling frustrated. 'Does it look stupid? I don't want to look like-'

'Shut up.' Paul rolled his eyes, walking to the wardrobe and pulling his pyjama pants down his legs.

I swallowed but didn't look away.

Paul raised an eyebrow at me and started to pull his boxers down.

I bit my lip and turned away, only to widen my eyes when I realised I was looking in the mirror and could still see him.

My eyes mapped his muscled thighs – thank you football – and his cock.

Heat flooded through me. I hadn't seen him naked for a while and I'd almost forgotten how unbelievably sexy he was.

My mouth parted as he pulled on a pair of blue boxers and my eyes raked up his body hungrily. I started coughing when his brown eyes caught mine in the mirror and he smirked at me.

I averted my eyes and he chuckled.

I jumped when I felt his body behind mine, his mouth at my ear.

'By the way, by fine, I meant you look fucking gorgeous.'

Then he was walking out the bedroom door and I stared down at my coffee, unable to help the big smile that spread across my face.

X

'Leave me alone.' I snapped at Renee.

'Are you okay?' I heard Rose say next to me.

That's weird, why is she here?

Where am I?

I looked up at her confused, blinking rapidly as the cafeteria came into focus.

The others were all staring at me curiously.

I must have fallen asleep.

'What?' I asked confused

'You were saying….' Rose frowned.

'Sorry, I talk in my sleep.' I said quickly.

'Baby bells, you weren't asleep.' Emmett said nervously.

Fuck.

I felt Paul's fingers gently stroke up my back and I relaxed a little, sighing.

I guess I should come clean about the PCP.

I grimaced. 'Shit sorry guys I took some heavy shit a few days ago and I guess I'm still tweaking.'

Rose nodded understandingly. 'Is that why you three skipped?'

I swallowed. 'Um yeah.'

She stared at me for a second, then nodded and turned to Embry, continuing a conversation that I'd obviously missed the first part of.

Emmett was on his phone, his fingers dancing over Rosalie's arm and Paul was still skimming his fingers down my spine.

I took a second to appreciate how fucking awesome my friends were, then shook my head and carried on pushing my food around on my plate.

My phone started ringing and I picked it up straight away when I saw it was Jasper.

'Jas!' I exclaimed.

Paul's hand left my back and I felt the loss, glancing at him in the corner of my eye.

He was staring at the table, his expression unreadable.

'Hey.' Jasper answered, his tone ambiguous.

Did he not win?

'How was it?' I asked nervously.

There was a pause and I bit my lip worriedly.

'Fuckin' awesome. I won all my heats.'

'Yay.' I grinned, at the others. 'He won.'

I put him on loudspeaker as they all congratulated him and he laughed.

'Thanks guys. Looking forward to celebrating this weekend.'

'You're back to just me.' I told him, switching the phone back and holding it to my ear.

'I got scouted baby.' Jasper said excitedly. 'California want me and you'll never guess the other college.'

'Who?' I said, smiling.

'Harvard.' He laughed happily. 'If I get this next comp too they want to offer me the full ride Bella. Fucking Harvard. My parents are fucking psyched.'

'Holy shit that's amazing.' I said, grinning. 'Well done.'

'Thanks darlin'.' Jasper grinned. 'The team are going to go celebrate now and then my parents want to take me out for dinner. There's a big party tonight at one of the guys houses.'

'That's so nice.' I said, wondering if he was going to ask me to come.

'But I'll see you tomorrow right?' He asked, I bit my lip, feeling my stomach plummet a little.

I thought I'd be seeing him today.

I knew he wasn't rejecting me, and it was perfectly normal for him to be going out for dinner with his parents and then with his team mates.

Besides, it's not like I could come to dinner with his parents…they didn't even know I existed.

And that was my choice more than Jasper's.

Plus, he hadn't asked any of us to the party.

There's the sound of laughing and cheering and Jasper's muffled voice for a moment.

'The king can't talk now Bella he's got shots to do.' Aiden, one of Jasper's team mates howls.

'Sure no problem, tell Jasper I'll-'

The sound cut off before I could finish and I trailed off, taking the phone from my ear and placing it on the table.

Rose shot me a look and I smiled at her, but it felt forced.

I was being completely pathetic.

I knew that.

Paul was drumming his fingers on the table and I stared down at his hand, biting my lip.

'Paul!'

I didn't bother to disguise my grimace as Kate walked over.

'Hey sugar.' He shot her a flirty smile and I sighed.

She bent to whisper in his ear, her blonde hair brushing my face.

'Why don't you come over tonight?' She said huskily.

I scowled. She actually smelt really nice.

Fuck. What if he says yes?

Will he leave me in the house?

Will I have to find somewhere else to go?

Where would I go?

To my alarm, I felt my eyes well up with tears and I swallowed heavily.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

Paul's eyes met mine and he frowned at me.

I blinked away my tears and stood up, walking out of the cafeteria and straight into the bathroom where I placed my hands on a sink, trying to stop the sobs that were threatening to leave my throat.

'Bella?' I heard Rose say softly behind me.

'Don't.' I managed to say. 'Don't ask me what's wrong, because I'm fucking fin-

She tugged my arm and pulled me into a tight hug, squeezing me.

'I thought you weren't a hugger.' I said, trying to be snarky and failing, my voice practically shaking.

'Shut up.' She laughed softly, pressing her head into my shoulder.

Then I was properly crying, tears falling from my face rapidly.

'Oh Bella.' Rose said softly, rubbing my back.

I just couldn't seem to stop.

The bathroom door crashed open and Rose made an exasperated sound.

'Paul I've got her.'

'Rose, just let me, please.' I heard him plead.

Rose let me go gently and immediately I was swept up in Paul's arms.

As soon as I breathed him in I started crying even harder and I buried my face into his neck, gripping him tightly.

'What happened?' Rose asked worriedly. 'I've never seen her like this.'

'I think it's just the come down.' Paul said softly, kissing my head. 'She's gonna be fine though, don't worry, I've got her.'

'Let me take you home baby.' He murmured in my ear.

The bell went, ringing loudly right next to us.

'Rose can you make sure no one's in the hall. I'm gonna take her out of here.'

'Okay, Bella please call me later?' She said, her hand rubbing my back again.

'Y-yeah.' I sobbed.

When we got to Paul's car, he pulled out immediately and I brought my knees up to my chest, tears still running down my face.

I didn't even realise the car had stopped when he pulled me out of my seat, gently lifting me into his arms.

He sat down on the sofa and I didn't bother moving out of his lap, crying quietly into his chest as he stroked my back.

'What's the matter?' He murmured.

'I…don't…know…' I sobbed. 'I can't…stop.'

'Okay I'm gonna call in sick for you, you can't go to work like this.'

I cried for hours, or at least I think it was hours.

When I stopped, I just felt…numb.

'Bella, what's the matter?' Paul asked me worriedly, holding my face.

I stared at him blankly. My body felt like lead, a heavy weight resting on my chest.

'Nothing.'

'Bella…' Paul murmured, 'Please, talk to me.'

'Paul, I don't feel anything.' I stared up at him. 'I'm…everything feels…'

'Shit, okay. Um…' Paul swallowed heavily, grabbing his phone and looking something up. 'Okay I'm going to call Jasper, stay right here okay? Don't move.'

'Okay.' I said monotonously, staring out in front of me.

The weight in my chest kept getting heavier, there was this inexplicable feeling of hopelessness building inside me and I didn't understand.

I blinked and Paul was sitting in front of me, looking worriedly into my eyes.

'How you feeling?'

'Same.' I said softly.

He stroked my hair behind my ear. 'It's gonna be okay baby, just the comedown.'

'I feel really…'

'Why don't you have a shower and go to bed?' He rubbed his thumb over my cheek. 'You'll feel better in the morning.'

When I got into the shower I just felt worse, and ended up sitting on the floor, staring at the wall again.

The door crashed open and I glanced up confused.

'Jesus Bella.' Paul groaned, putting his head in his hands. 'You've been in there for like 40 minutes. I called your name 20 times I was worried you'd….' He trailed off, frowning. 'Why are you sitting on the floor?'

'I just…felt like it.' I said quietly.

Paul stared at me for a second and then came to the door and opened it, stepping inside the shower and sitting on the wet floor next to me, water darkening his clothes and making them stick to his skin.

'I'm naked.'

He shrugged. 'Seen it before, remember?'

'You're getting wet.'

'I don't care.' He said softly, leaning his back against the wall. The water was falling in his eyes, his brown hair flattening against his head.

I sighed, resting my chin on my knees.

Some time passed, I wasn't sure how long, but then Paul moved behind me.

'Want me to wash your hair?' He asked me, stroking my hair behind my ear and kissing my head.

I shrugged and heard rustling before his hands touched my head, gently rubbing in the shampoo.

I closed my eyes as his fingers rubbed into my scalp.

Then he started talking. At first, I didn't really pay attention but when he started talking about Transformers I tuned in, listening to his deep voice as he talked to himself.

'Here's my question – and I know the later movies kind of touch on it – but why did everything happen in America? Why is that the only place the autobots came to? And you know when Megatron was searching for the all spark, how come he…'

I burst into tears when Paul finished conditioning my hair and he sat himself behind me, holding me tightly.

'It's okay.' He soothed.

'I…I know.' I sobbed. 'I feel b-better, it's j-just….'

'Shhh.'

Eventually I stopped crying again, the weight in my chest starting to finally disappear.

Paul got out the shower first, grabbing me a towel and wrapping me in it. He sent me to the spare room so he could get out of the wet clothes but I ignored him and went to his room instead, pulling on some of his clothes and crawling into the bed, burying my face in his pillow.

I heard him sigh when he came into the room, but after some rustling around he got in the bed with me.

'Thank you. Again.' I said softly from my side of the bed.

He hummed. 'It's okay, I've had a rough comedown before, besides you've got a lot to deal with right now.'

'I don't know what I'd do without you.' I admitted quietly.

Paul didn't say anything, just flicked off the light.

I sighed and then his warm arms were wrapping around my torso, pulling me back against his body. He kissed the back of my neck gently.

'You'll never have to find out.' He murmured, so quietly I wasn't sure if I imagined it.

X

'Come on.' Paul urged me, gesturing to the coffee I was supposed to be drinking.

I glared at him. 'Stop rushing me.'

I'd woken up with a slightly clearer head, and I felt a lot better, Paul on the other hand, had been in a terrible mood all morning. I felt like he was mad at me, but I couldn't figure out why.

Was it because he had to look after me last night? Did I mess up his plans?

'You're going to make us late.' He huffed, gesturing to my body. 'You're not even fucking dressed yet.'

I scowled at him, 'Sorry for wanting a coffee and a piece of fucking toast first.'

'Just go get dressed.' Paul begged me in an exasperated tone, running a hand through his messy brown hair.

I stood up, slamming my coffee cup on the kitchen island.

'Fine. But I want to point out that you haven't even said good fucking morning to me and you're being a class A asshole today. Whatever I did to make you mad at me just fucking tell me so I can fix it.'

I started walking out the door then was pulled back into a warm body, strong arms wrapping around my middle.

Heat shot down my spine.

'Good fucking morning.' Paul murmured in my ear, his hot breath against my skin making me shiver.

I swallowed, struggling out of his hold.

'Not forgiven.' I declared, forcing my expression to stay nonchalant, even though my heart was racing in my chest.

He chuckled at me, rolling his brown eyes. 'Fine, I'm sorry for being a, how did you put it? Class A asshole. I'm not mad at you Bella.'

I frowned. 'Then who are you mad at?'

There was a knock at the front door and Paul's face darkened.

'Are you going to get that?' I asked him confused.

He grimaced and then turned to walk upstairs.

'You can get it.'

I stared up at him bewildered and then walked to the front door, turning the key in the lock and opening it.

Jasper stood in the doorway in a black T-shirt and faded jeans. He looked as gorgeous as usual, but a little rough around the edges, appearing slightly disheveled, his blue eyes bloodshot.

'Hey.' He said softly, stepping forwards and wrapping me in his arms.

I buried my face in his neck and breathed him in.

I laughed against his skin. 'You smell like a brewery.'

'I feel like I've drunk an entire brewery.' He mumbled into my hair.

I pulled back, smiling at him.

His eyes were troubled and I frowned.

'What's wrong?'

He sighed. 'I'm just…I'm sorry I didn't come over last night.'

I shifted.

'You were celebrating.' I said, shrugging. 'It's fine.'

Jasper placed his hands on my hips and tugged me closer gently. 'Paul called in the afternoon and said you were…not dealing. I should have…left and come here. I'm sorry.'

Something in my chest sunk at the realisation he'd spoken to Paul and not cared enough to show up. I swallowed heavily.

'I'm sorry he called you…'

Jasper's eyes searched mine. 'No Bella, he was right to call and I should have come, I just…I was drunk and I…sometimes I'm just an ass I'm really sorry baby.'

'Glad you can admit it.' Paul said stonily from behind me.

I turned to glare at him and he shrugged at me.

Jasper sighed and I turned back to face him.

He bent his head and kissed my cheek softly, his minty breath washing over my mouth, I shivered and he smiled against my skin, pulling back and cupping my face with his hands.

'I'm really sorry darlin', I'll make it up to you I promise. Are you feeling okay today?'

I nodded and he smiled sweetly at me. 'That's good. Do you…am I forgiven?' He stated at me beseechingly, his baby blue eyes like bottomless pools as they surveyed mine.

I nodded. 'It's fine.'

Jasper hummed and gave me a soft smile before leaning in and kissing me gently, his lips brushing over mine. I shivered again and he kissed his way to my jaw.

'Go get dressed Bella.' Paul said from behind me, sounding even more angry than before.

I turned to face him and he nodded at the stairs.

Well at least now I knew it wasn't me he was mad at.

I hesitated. I didn't want them to have an argument.

Paul shot me a look.

'Tenemos que irnos o llegaremos tarde. Solo quiero hablar con el, está bien, lo prometon,'

We need to leave or we'll be late. It's fine I promise. I just want to talk to him.

I sighed and then extricated myself from Jasper, giving him a small smile before turning and walking past Paul.

'I hate it when you two do that.' Jasper said in an irritated voice, walking into the kitchen, Paul following closely behind him.

I grimaced as I got to the top of the stairs and heard raised voices.

Shit.

When I came back downstairs Jasper was sitting at the counter with his head in his arms, groaning softly as Paul clattered around the kitchen unnecessarily.

I rolled my eyes.

'Thought we were in a rush.' I said, placing a hand on my hip as I raised an eyebrow at Paul.

He narrowed his eyes at me.

'Ugh I don't want to go. Can we just stay here today?' Jasper groaned.

'You'll feel better if you don't wallow in it.' Paul said sharply.

I stepped behind Jasper and kissed his cheek.

'I have a good hangover cure.' I murmured into his ear, biting the ear lobe softly.

He shot up, his blue eyes suddenly brighter. 'What are we waiting for? Let's go.'

'Did you drive?' I asked Jasper curiously, not sure if he was road safe in his current state.

He laughed. 'Barely. Want to drive instead?'

'Fuck yeah.' I practically snatched the keys out his hand and he laughed.

'You may as well come in my car dude.' He said to Paul, raising an eyebrow. 'We're all coming back here later anyway.'

I smiled at him. 'You're staying tonight?'

He pulled me in to his arms and kissed me softly. 'Yeah.' He murmured against my mouth. 'Nowhere else I'd rather be baby.'

'Shot gun.' Paul said, grabbing the keys from my hand, unlocking the car and jumping into the passenger seat.

I looked at Jasper but he just shrugged.

I climbed into the driver's seat and adjusted it, winking at Jasper in the mirror.

He gave me a lazy smile and leant his head against the back rest, closing his eyes.

'Bella, please don't drive too fast.' He teased, 'I may throw up on you.'

I scoffed. 'I don't care, driving this baby slow is a fucking crime.'

Paul chuckled softly, putting down the window and resting his elbow on it.

I glanced at him for a second and when our eyes met my heart jumped in my chest.

I pressed the button to turn the car on and sped down the street.

X

'Are you ready?' I asked Paul, grabbing a glass from the cupboard and filling it up with water.

He was taking me to work while Jasper had a nap.

I was so fucking nervous about seeing Edward and a big part of me hoped he wouldn't be there.

'Yeah.'

'Have a good shift baby.' Jasper called from the sofa where he was lying, a huge bag of chips on his lap.

The boys were going to order pizza and grab some beers so we could chill and watch a movie when I got back from work.

Jasper was in total binge mode today. He'd been so hungover, honestly it was kind of hilarious watching him try to function, especially because he's normally so chilled.

Lauren had asked to speak to him at break and he'd trailed after her looking like he was going to throw up. Apparently, he still had some stuff at her house, and she wanted him and his family to come for dinner when he got it. The whole thing was kind of uncomfortable, especially because her dad was still good friends with his parents.

I'd spent most of the day with Rose, who clearly had a lot of questions but refused to ask me any. In the end I just dragged her to the smoking area and updated her on what was going on.

I kept things vague about Edward, just saying that I'd figured out how I knew him, and things were awkward between us now. I said the drug thing was because of my mom, and that she didn't ask me about, which I was grateful for, because I wasn't sure I'd be able to even bring it up without crying.

Rose was doing okay, Emmett's mom seemed to be still be doing well after the treatment, so he was spending less time at home and focusing on football again a little. It also meant Rose could stay at Emmett's instead of at home with her mom, who was still driving her insane about college.

'Come on then.' Paul said to me, his eyes flashing slightly.

I knew he wanted to talk to Edward, but I really, really didn't want him to.

I gulped down some water and Paul shot me a concerned look.

I shook my head at him. 'Let's go.'

The drive to the garage was filled with silence. Paul's fingers drummed on the steering wheel and I stared out the window, feeling my chest grow tighter and tighter until I felt like I could barely breathe.

Edward said he was going to be on Susan's service, so I didn't know what that meant for Garrett, or whether I'd have someone new with me or not.

When we pulled up, Paul got out the car first and I undid my seatbelt slowly, swallowing heavily.

It was going to be fine.

'Bella.' Paul said from outside the car, tapping on the window.

I looked up at him and he sighed, opening the door and gently pulling me from the seat.

He wrapped me into a hug and I held him tightly, pressing my face into his neck and breathing him in.

'It's gonna be fine, okay. Just focus on the work.' He kissed my head and then grabbed my hand, walking us towards the line of garages.

'Bella!' Garrett called, walking up with a concerned look on his face. 'How are you doing sugar? I was worried about ya.'

'I'm okay now.' I said to Garrett, stepping towards him.

He held my shoulders and scanned my eyes, looking troubled. 'You don't look like you're okay hon.'

'Gee thanks Gar, are you trying to say I look shit? I look better than you, old man.' I teased softly.

He chuckled and ruffled my hair. 'Aw that's my Bells.'

He turned to Paul. 'Hey Paul, how's it hanging?'

Paul gave an amused smile. 'Long low and to the left.'

Garrett rolled his eyes.

'That is such an old joke.' I complained, 'You'd think that would come from the actual old man, not from-'

My words caught in my throat as Edward walked out of Carlisle's office.

He had a bad cut above his right eye, his arm in a sling.

What the fuck had happened to him?

Paul started striding towards him immediately and my chest lurched.

'Paul.' I warned. He didn't stop, grabbing Edward by the shirt and I ran to them, placing my hand on Paul's arm.

'Paul, don't.' I pleaded, glancing down at the line of garages.

Luckily no one seemed to have noticed what was going on.

'You're going to want to let go of me right fucking now.' Edward spat venomously.

Edward was bigger but he was injured, with only one usable arm.

'I'll let go of you when I decide I want to.' Paul said back in a threatening tone.

'Paul, please stop.' I begged. 'Just leave it.'

'No.' Paul said, flicking his gaze to me. 'He left you in the middle of nowhere.'

'It was a fucking reserve in the afternoon, she was fine.' Edward snapped.

Paul laughed humourlessly. 'Fine? She was fucking broken, you asshole. The minute you left she took enough shit to fuck her up for days and if I hadn't found her, she might be dead. Does that sound fine to you, you fucking ignorant prick.'

Edward's eyes suddenly shot to mine, the startling green making my breath catch in my chest. 'What? Why?'

Paul pulled him tighter, glaring at him. 'Because her fucking mom didn't tell her anything so she didn't know about what happened to you, asshole. She's fucking devastated.'

'Paul, please stop.' I urged brokenly, my eyes filling with tears.

Paul turned to look at me and then sighed, letting go of Edward and shoving him back a little.

'Just leave her alone.' Paul said to Edward, clenching his fists. 'You made your fucking point. You don't want anything to do with her, then fine. Just leave her be.'

Edward stood there, staring down at the floor and Paul gently led me back to Garrett, who was staring at him with a confused expression.

'What's going on?' Garrett asked curiously. 'Did something happen between you and Mason Bella?'

'No.' I said softly. 'It's fine.'

Garrett scoffed at me, not buying it and I swallowed heavily.

Paul wiped my tears away with his thumbs and then smiled at me. 'I'll be back in a few hours to get you, okay?'

I bit my lip and nodded. 'Okay.'

'Really sorry about all that Garrett.' Paul said, sheepishly. 'Just had something I wanted to talk about.'

Garrett nodded, but then his gaze hardened. 'I like you kid, but mess with one of my guys like that again and you aren't allowed back on this property, that clear?'

Paul nodded respectfully. 'Crystal.'

He walked back to his car and I groaned, placing my head in my hand.

'I'm so sorry.' I apologised.

Garrett placed a hand on my shoulder. 'Bella, what's going on? Mason asked to move to Susan's service and then your friend shows up and threatens him? Did something happen?'

'No.' I lied. 'It's fine.'

Garrett frowned. 'Well as I told Mason, he can't just move to Susan 'cos he feels like it. So, if there's shit going on with you two, you need to tell me so I can separate you.'

'He doesn't want to work with me.' I said softly.

'Well that's neither here nor there Bells.' Garrett said, crossing his arms. 'If there's a serious problem then we can move one of you, but not being best friends really isn't an acceptable reason. He doesn't have to like you, you don't have to like him, I need to know if you can work with him. Can you?'

I floundered 'I…Yeah.'

Garrett nodded stiffly. 'That's what he said too, so you can both get over it and just work. I'll keep the teamwork down to a minimum but he needs to teach you, because that's how he he learns, so I can't really limit the contact, you gonna be okay?'

'Yeah.' I repeated, more firmly. 'Sorry Garrett.'

He sighed softly and ruffled my hair. 'Come on then kid, radiator needs replacing on this car and the one behind needs an engine repair, let's get it done.'

I focused on the work, and when Edward joined us, we didn't talk to each other, just got on with what's in front of us.

Despite Garrett's words, he didn't ask us to do anything that involved discussion or even working on the same thing at once, so I spent the shift lost in my own work.

I noticed Edward glancing at me a few times, but I forced myself not to look at him, scared I'd just start crying.

Midway through Alex and Jared came over to talk to me, asking where I've been and if I was feeling better.

I was light and playful with them but kept quiet when Alex started talking to Edward.

I heard Paul's car as Garrett and I were finishing the engine. Edward had started it while we did the radiator and then we'd swapped, Edward working on the final details of the other car while Garrett talked me through the repair.

I glanced up and smiled as I saw Paul and Jasper emerge from the car, Jasper looking slightly more perky than he had earlier.

They laughed at something together and I let out a sigh of relief that they'd made up.

Garrett turned to me with a slight laugh. 'Come on kid, not finished yet.'

'I know, I know.' I said, nudging him with my hip.

'She'll be with you in a few minutes fellas.' Garrett said with a grin as the boys approached us.

'That's cool, I haven't seen her do this yet.' Jasper said, shooting me a sexy smile as he tucked his hair behind his ear.

I smiled and continued working, noticing in the corner of my eye, Paul wander off, presumably to find Jared.

'Okay. Grab the scanner Bells.' Garrett said, wiping his hands on his jeans.

I moved to our workstation to grab it and then handed it to him.

'We green?' I asked, wiping some sweat from my brow.

'Yep.' Garrett said, shooting me a smile. 'All done, great work.'

'Nice one baby.' Jasper said, holding out his arms.

I rolled my eyes and stepped into them, laughing when he dipped me and kissed me on the mouth.

'Stop.' I grinned, pulling out of his arms and swatting him playfully.

He smirked. 'But you look so cute like that, covered in oil and all sweaty.'

His blue eyes glinted.

'Shut up.' I groaned. 'Garrett, this is Jasper, Jasper, this is my boss Garrett.'

'Nice to meet you Jasper.' Garrett said, shaking his hand.

Paul came back, laughing with Jared at something and Jared widened his eyes when he saw Jasper.

'Wow.' He mouthed at me.

I rolled my eyes.

'Okay stop embarrassing me now guys, let's go.' I said to Paul and Jasper, groaning when Alex, Seth and Sam came to see what was going on.

'Who's this Bella?' Alex said, grinning at me slyly. 'Have you replaced me already?'

'It was never serious between us 'Lex.' I teased, 'You know I only wanted you for your body.'

'Oh god, that's my call to leave.' Garrett groaned, walking over to Carlisle's office.

'I'm just joking Gar.' I called with a laugh.

'No she isn't!' Alex said cheerfully. 'What we had was love B.'

'He wishes.' Sam said to Jasper.

Seth chuckled. 'Yeah he really does.'

Alex grinned, shrugging. 'I'm not denying.'

'Oh, stop it Alex.' I groaned.

'Am I making your boyfriend jealous?' Alex teased. 'Say, which one is the boyfriend Bella?'

I huffed. 'Neither.'

'Our little player.' Sam said heartfeltly.

'Guys.' I hissed. 'You're so embarrassing.'

I made a face at Paul and Jasper but they were smiling at the easy banter.

'Aw.' Alex said, holding a hand to his heart. 'You're breaking my heart B.'

I rolled my eyes.

'So, we already know this is Paul, but this one is…?' Jared said, grinning at me.

'Jasper.' I said, glancing over at him with a smile.

Jasper smiled back at me.

'And Jasper isn't the boyfriend?' Jared continued, winking at me as I turned to face him.

I glared at him.

'Well I'm pretty sure there was kissing Seth, did you see kissing?' Sam said conspiratorially.

'I did Sam.' Seth said seriously. 'There was definitely kissing.'

'You all suck, so much.' I groaned, burying my head in my hands.

'So, what's with the kissing Bells?' Jared teased.

Jasper came to my defence with a slight laugh. 'We're just hanging out.' He shot me a smirk. 'Haven't gotten her to date me yet.'

Seth and Sam howled at that and I laughed, 'Come on guys, get back to work. I'm going now anyway.'

'We missed you.' Sam said, ruffling my hair.

'Yeah B, no more sick days.' Alex picked me up and spun me around.

'Ugh, you're gonna make me sick.' I protested.

'Mace, you missed little Bella too right?' Seth called out.

I stiffened in Alex's arms and he looked down at me with a frown.

'What's u-' I clapped my hand over his mouth and gave him a warning look.

He shrugged and I moved my hand, my eyes darting to where Edward was standing at the back of the other car.

Intense emerald eyes locked with mine for a moment, making me shiver and feel like I was going to cry all at once. Then he looked away. 'No.'

Jasper frowned a little and Sam shook his head.

'He doesn't mean it dude. That's just Mace. He was asking about her when she didn't come to work.' Sam said with a grin.

'He was?' Paul and I asked at the same time.

Sam frowned. 'Yeah.'

Paul glared at Edward and I sighed.

'Right, let's go, remember, pizza…beer.' I said, grabbing Paul's arm.

'Oh, are we invited?' Seth grinned.

'Nope, not now, not ever gorgeous.' I said, stepping forward and kissing him on the cheek.

'Jeez Bells, hope Natalie doesn't find out about that.' Alex joked. 'She'll be throwing down with you for Seth.'

'I happen to get on very well with Natalie.' I said smirking, 'Maybe I'll fight Seth for her.'

Seth's wife, Natalie, was really nice, she was absolutely gorgeous too, they made a really good looking couple. She often came to pick Seth up from work on weekends and if he was still working she just hung out with me.

'Oh my.' Alex said, clasping his heart with a grin.

'I'm going!' I laughed. 'See you all tomorrow.'

X

When we got through Paul's door, Jasper wrapped his arms around my thighs and picked me up and started walking upstairs with me.

'Order the pizza dude.' He called to Paul as he nipped at my neck.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, staring down at him curiously.

'I believe I was promised a hangover cure.' He said playfully, nudging his head against my boobs.

I bit back a moan when he grabbed my ass, placing a kiss on my neck.

I glanced back down the stairs.

Paul was staring down at the floor, his face withdrawn.

I frowned but then we were at the top of the stairs and Jasper let me down, pinning me against the wall and kissing me fiercely. I lost myself in the feel of his tongue against mine.

My body felt electrified at his touch, lust catapulting through me as I tugged his T-shirt up, my hands running over his hard, muscled body.

His skin was so hot and he felt so good.

He walked us into the guest room and pulled off my shirt, his mouth going to my neck and placing hot wet kisses that made me tremble with desire.

'We need to be quick baby, but I'll make it up to you later.' He murmured throatily, spinning me around so my back was against his chest.

'Mm, I've missed you.' He said huskily, running his hands all over my body. He undid my bra and I arched my back into his body as his large hands cupped my breasts, his thumb brushing over my nipples. He groaned, 'Jesus, look how fuckin' sexy you are.'

He was so hard against my ass and I moaned as he rubbed himself against me, holding me tight against his body.

I turned my head to his and our mouths met in a heated kiss as one of his hands moved lower down my body, sliding inside my underwear. I gasped his name and he groaned into my mouth.

'You're so wet baby.' He panted, 'So fucking hot. Can you feel how hard you make me? God I want to be inside of you.'

He teased me, touching me everywhere but where I wanted it most. 'Please.' I whimpered. Then his long digits were pushing inside me and I opened my mouth gasping in pleasure, my hands reaching behind me to touch his cock through his jeans.

'Fuck.' Jasper said throatily, kissing down my neck hungrily.

'God please Jasper.' I moaned, 'I need you.'

He shivered, walking us to the bed. I shimmied out of the underwear that I'd popped into Walmart after school to grab and my new leggings, gasping as Jasper's hands gripped my hips, bending over so my hands rested on the bed.

'Fuck.' I moaned.

'You look so fucking hot like this, fuck.' Jasper groaned, squeezing my ass cheeks as he stepped between my legs. 'Bent over and waiting for my cock. Do you want me to fuck you darlin'?'

'God Jasper.' I panted, 'Yes.'

'Ugh.' I cried out as his fingers slid inside of me again.

He tugged at my bottom lip with his teeth and then pulled back from me.

I turned my head to look at him and he surveyed me with dark eyes as he undid his jeans, pulling down his boxers.

I moaned at the sight of his hard cock, bobbing slightly as he pushed his jeans down his legs.

'Jasper.' I whimpered as he grabbed a condom and slid it on himself, wrapping his hand around his thick cock as he looked at me, his eyes stormy with desire.

'God fuck me, please.' I gasped.

He groaned stepping towards me and tugging my body back to him.

'Jesus, fuck.' I groaned as he slowly slid inside of me.

'Christ.' He panted. 'Bella.'

He was so thick like this, so deep inside of me.

He grabbed my hips and started slamming into me.

My whole body arched and I had to bite my lip to keep quiet.

'Jas-per.' I panted.

'God you feel so good.' He groaned, 'Fuck.'

I gripped the sheets hard, pushing my body back to meet his thrusts and he moaned, fucking me harder.

'Right there, right fucking there.' I gasped, my head bowing at the intense feeling as he hit my g-spot.

'Right. There. Baby?' Jasper grunted, 'Fuck I can feel you, so fucking tight, look at how good you look with my cock inside of you.'

'Jasper.' I gasped. 'Harder.'

He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulling me up so my back was against his chest.

The angle was indescribable and my whole body shook.

'Oh god.' I gasped, turning my head to meet his mouth.

It was a violent kiss, teeth and tongues and I cried out into his mouth as one of his hands slid down between my legs, rubbing my clit.

'Holy fuck, Jasper.' I gasped.

'I want you to cum for me.' He said throatily in my ear. 'I want to feel you cum all over my cock baby.'

'I'm…' I gasped. 'I'm right there…'

'Is that it, baby?' Jasper panted, 'God you feel so fucking good, I love being inside of you, fucking you.'

'Oh god Jasper please.' I cried. 'Don't stop, don't stop.'

'Mm fuck that's it baby girl,' Jasper groaned, 'God I'm gonna cum too, do you want my cum?'

'God Jasper, I'm…' I went silent as the pleasure started to build and my body started shaking.

Then my orgasm hit, and my mouth clashed with Jasper's, my moans muffled by his tongue as he kissed me deeply.

He tore his mouth from mine and groaned low in his throat as he fell over the edge too, his arms tightening around my body.

We were both breathing heavily and Jasper gently lowered us to the bed, collapsing next to me with a groan.

'Fuck that was good.' He said, rubbing his face. 'I'm dead now though. You'll have to carry me downstairs.'

I grinned and leant on my forearm to kiss him, humming as he tangled his hand in my hair, his tongue playfully flicking at mine.

I pulled back with a smile, shivering as his deep blue eyes met mine. 'Can we talk later?' He said softly, kissing my cheek.

'Yeah.' I said, biting my lip. 'Later.'

He gave me a breath-taking smile and I felt my chest flutter.

'God I'm starving.' Jasper said with a yawn, sitting up and taking off the condom with a grimace.

I sighed and got up too, pulling my clothes on.

X

'I need to go back to the flat tomorrow, just to get some clothes and shit.' I said dejectedly, sliding off the sofa and onto the floor in front of it, bringing my knees to my chest as I laid back against Paul's shins.

The three of us had managed to get through two gigantic pepperoni pizzas and two 6-packs of beer.

It was all too much for Jasper, who was passed out on the other sofa, looking ridiculously cute, his blonde hair mussed up and mouth slightly open.

The three of us had been sitting on the sofa together, but he'd taken himself over there about halfway through the movie.

'I can go for you.' Paul murmured.

I leant back to look up at him. 'Really?'

He nodded, running his hands through my hair gently.

I hummed, smiling up at him. The smile he gave me back made my heart start pounding in my chest but it quickly disappeared, his eyes going back to the movie.

I frowned but he didn't notice, absent-mindedly threading my hair together at the top of my head.

I grinned, 'You know how to braid?'

His face was suddenly guarded and he flicked his eyes down to mine, the deep brown making my breath catch. 'I used to for my mom, before she lost it.'

I reached up to squeeze his hand.

I knew he didn't talk about his mom much and it felt good that he trusted me enough to speak about her to me.

'Will you do mine?' I asked gently.

He didn't answer, but his hands started weaving my hair together.

I kept my head tilted up, staring up at him as he deftly plaited my hair into a French braid.

His fingers felt good as they stroked through my hair and he was really gentle and careful.

My breathing hitched as I stared up at him. The strong line of his jaw had a slight shadow to it, his mouth gently parted as he concentrated.

His eyes were fixed on my hair, the warm brown hypnotisingly deep.

He was so gorgeous.

When he finished, he reached down to my wrist and gently tugged the hair tie off me, tying off the braid, his fingers brushing my neck gently. I shivered.

'Thanks.' I breathed out.

He looked at me for a moment, his eyes flickering with something I couldn't place, then nudged my shoulder with his knee.

'I'm pretty beat. I'm going to go to bed.'

I glanced over to Jasper. 'Yeah…okay. Um, you go up and I'll tidy up down here and then drag this one upstairs.'

Paul's jaw tightened a little then he nodded. He stood up and I got to my feet too, stretching my arms above my head.

He stared at me for a second, like he was debating something, then gently tugged me into his arms.

I breathed him in, hugging him back tightly.

'Night Bella.' He breathed, then he was striding upstairs.

I finished clearing up and then woke Jasper up by straddling his lap, leaning down to kiss him.

He hummed and I felt him smile against my mouth as he gently cupped the back of my head and returned my kiss.

I giggled as he rolled over and we fell to the floor, his body winding me slightly as he landed on top of me.

'Jasper.' I protested laughing.

'Whoops.' He laughed into my neck.

He leant up on his forearms and smiled down at me, his blue eyes bright and burning into mine.

'Mmm that was a good way to wake up.'

I grinned and he leant in to kiss me again, cupping my cheek with his hand.

'I like your hair like this.' He hummed against my mouth.

I shifted, something wrenching in my chest as I remembered staring up at Paul as he plaited it.

'What's wrong?' Jasper asked me, pulling back with a frown.

'Nothing I just…did you still want to talk?' I asked him softly, staring up at him.

He nodded, his blue eyes scanning mine. 'Yeah. Now?'

'Can I smoke?' I asked him, biting my lip.

He leant down to kiss my neck softly. 'Sure baby, let's go outside.'

Jasper groaned as I lit my cigarette. 'I can't wait for the next comp to be over. I'm going to appreciate every single cig I swear.'

I laughed. 'How are you gonna cope when you're drunk at the party tomorrow?'

He smirked naughtily. 'I was thinking…' He ran his hand up my thigh softly, kissing up my neck, 'I would distract myself by fucking my girl's brains out in the bathroom.'

I moaned softly and he nipped at my jaw, a glint in his eye.

'So…' Jasper said softly, turning my head gently to face his.

'So,' I repeated, biting my lip.

Jasper swallowed, his eyes searching mine. 'I'm really sorry about yesterday darlin'. I should have been with you, and when you were high, I'm sorry I left, I don't want you to think that you're not important to me, because you are.'

I sighed as I looked into his baby blues. 'I know.' I said softly.

'Do you want to…that is, if you feel like you can, why did you…what happened with-'

'I want to tell you.' I interrupted, 'but can you promise me something?' I took a deep drag and flicked my ash next to me.

Jasper nodded, his eyes intense as they looked into mine.

'Just…don't say anything until I'm done, okay?'

He wrapped his hand around my calf and nodded. 'Okay baby.'

I told him everything, staring out at the garden. He was quiet the whole time, but I was glad I couldn't see his face.

When I finished I didn't turn to look at him, just breathed out slowly, resting my head on my knees, tears running down my cheeks.

'I'm so sorry darlin'.' Jasper said softly, moving to kneel in front of me.

I swallowed, looking up into his eyes and he cupped my cheeks, kissing my tears away.

'I don't know what else I can say right now. She doesn't deserve to have you as a daughter.'

More tears fell from my eyes and Jasper pressed his forehead to mine. 'I'm so fucking sorry you have to deal with this shit.'

'Are you mad I told Paul first?' I asked him, sniffling.

Jasper swallowed. 'No…I…I should have been with you, I'm so sorry baby.'

I realised he must have thought that I told Paul when I left school on Thursday but didn't bother to correct him.

He hugged me tightly, kissing my head and I relaxed into his arms, breathing him in.

I felt my eyes start to close and was vaguely aware of him carrying me up the stairs.

'Do you want to shower darlin'?' Jasper murmured in my ear.

'No, just sleep.' I mumbled.

'Okay.' Jasper hummed, kissing my head.

I was fast asleep the minute my head hit the pillow.

X

The next week passed in a blur. The party on Saturday was really fun, I didn't really drink because I was still feeling the effects of the drugs I took, so I drove and just enjoyed spending time with the others.

Jasper hung out at Paul's all weekend, but then he was back to the crazy training schedule, in time for his next competition.

Living with Paul was…strange. When Jasper was over I used the spare room, but when he wasn't, I always slept with Paul. We argued, at least twice a day, but somehow fell into an easy routine with each other. The more time I spent with him alone, the more confused I started to feel. This was the first time since Jasper and I got together that Paul wasn't ignoring me, or pushing me away, it was like it was before between us, only without the sex. Which incidentally, I couldn't stop thinking about.

I didn't kiss him again, and he didn't kiss me, but I couldn't deny that I wanted to. There was an undercurrent of tension between us, that was continually building, getting stronger and stronger. It was weird because it wasn't purely sexual. Don't get me wrong, I wanted him, it was just, I was content even being near him, just hugging him, sleeping next to him. He made me feel so safe, like he'd protect me. I was starting to crave the feeling I got when I was in his arms.

Phil had called me three times. I hadn't answered, but after the third time he'd texted me.

Bella, where are you? I came back yesterday and Renee says you haven't been home in a few days. Let me know you're okay. Phil

I'd replied,

I'm fine. Not coming back. Thanks.

He'd sent a few more texts asking where I was and why I wasn't coming back, but I didn't bother to reply.

Paul, as promised, had gone to pick up a bunch of my stuff, but apparently Renee hadn't been there, and no Phil either.

Jasper had finished up his last competition today, and was finally free for a couple of months, before the next round of training began.

Everyone was hanging out tonight at Emmett's, he and Rose were cooking some food for us and his mom, it should be a fun evening and I was excited to meet her.

I sighed as I pulled the latch to open the bonnet of the car I was working on. Garrett had left me in charge of it, the job was pretty simple, just a standard vehicle check for insurance.

I'd worked most days this week actually, trying to make up for the hours I missed when I was dealing with all the shit with Edward.

Things with us had been pretty awkward since the confrontation with Paul. I tried my best not to look at him, or get in his way, but sometimes I caught him looking at me, and when Alice came to meet him after work one day, she came up to me and started talking to me, making a gesture at him to come over, which he ignored.

She was kind of strange, but seemed nice enough, and I was desperate to find out about him from her.

Unfortunately, she hadn't really said anything about him, just asked me what school I went to and what I liked to do in my spare time. It was pretty menial, casual conversation, but intriguing at the same time. I didn't know why she wanted to talk to me, but her lack of animosity made me wonder how much she actually knew about Edward and I, and what had happened between us.

I bent over the car, checking the battery with the scanner.

'Uh, Bella, can we talk?' Edward said next to me.

I glanced up at him so fast I hit my head on the roof off the bonnet.

'Shit.' I gasped.

Edward grabbed my face, looking at my head, his emerald eyes concerned.

'Fuck, sorry. Are you okay?'

'Um…yeah.' I said slowly, my eyes wide as I stared up at him. 'W-why d-what-ar-why are you…'

'Are you sure you're okay?' he smirked, quirking an eyebrow.

I sighed and his smile dropped. 'Look I know I've been a…it's just I thought…but then now it's…ah, I just want to talk to you okay?'

'Um, okay.' I said nervously, swallowing. 'Now?'

He seemed to realise all of a sudden that his hands were still on my face and he pulled them away hastily.

Edward frowned and looked around. 'Uh no. Well…if this is the only place you feel comfortable with me. We could-'

'It's fine.' I said softly, my heart racing in my chest.

He wanted to talk? Did this mean he was willing to…believe me?

'How about I meet you tomorrow after school?'

Edward nodded, 'Okay, where?'

I sighed. 'Reserve?'

He frowned. 'But last time…'

'Reserve.' I repeated. 'By the swings and the roundabout.'

'I'll be there.' Edward said softly. 'I'm sorry about…your head.'

A/N

Phew. That was a long wait guys I'm so sorry. This story kind of writes itself, but then it ends up with all this extra stuff that kind of clogs up the storyline. Maybe when it's finished I'll pop all the outtakes into another fic, I swear there have been way too many!

I think there's about 10 chapters left, which means the story is kind of longer than I anticipated. I also really feel like my writing style has changed while writing this, so I do apologise if what I write now feels slightly different to my first couple of chapters. Believe it or not, those early lemons were the first ones I'd ever written (Maybe it's completely believable lol) but from feedback I hear they're getting better, so that's good news.

I am sorry that I'm taking so long to update for you. I'm kind of chronically bad at taking on too many things at once (hence why I've got like 4 of these on the go right now whoops)

If you are enjoying this, please do leave me a review. They really make my day.

For everyone talking about how much they love Paul, I completely agree, he's probably my favourite character I've ever written, aside from Peter in 'Irresistible' – (Hint hint: go read that).

I promise I do have a plan for this story and everything is falling in place as it should. Part of me kind of wants to rewrite the first 6 chapters but I'm going to leave it as it is – this is my first fanfic after all, and it's kind of nice to read for that reason.

Lots of love, please, pretty please, leave me a review.

P.S That Paul POV is the ONLY other time we'll ever hear from anyone who isn't Bella, except in the outtakes if I do them...

P.P.S Apologies for the very long A/N : D

Creaatingmadness xx