Chapter 21

A day after her father's visit Rei and Jadeite were walking into the training session. She had made a decision earlier in the day. One that others might not agree with, but she knew was right, for the moment. She immediately approached Minako, Usagi, and Mamoru.

"Can I talk to you three for a moment please?" Rei asked quietly.

"Sure." Usagi answered.

"Away from everyone else please?" Rei requested.

All three gave her curious looks, but followed her to the tree line for privacy. Rei took out her henshi pen, and handed it to Usagi. Usagi looked confused, and honestly upset.

"Why are you giving this to me? What's going on? Rei, you're not allowed to quit." Usagi said, sounding very upset.

"I'm not quitting Usa. I promise. It's just that my emotions, and mind are a mess right now. I'm not in a good place, and right now, I don't feel comfortable having access to my powers, even for training. I know I couldn't pull them right now any way." Rei explained.

"What happened?" Usagi asked.

"My father came to see my yesterday." Rei responded.

"HE WHAT?" Usagi shrieked.

"Usa, calm down. It's not what you think." Rei said quickly.

"So what happened?" Mamoru asked quietly.

Rei told them about the visit, and all Takashi had said. They listened quietly until she finished.

"Now I understand." Minako said.

"Yeah. I've been a mess since. I still want to train, but not with my powers. I can't. I'll work on my hand to hand." Rei stated.

"You need to learn how to use your powers even when your own emotions are high though." Usagi protested.

"I know, but right now I have no control over my emotions. That puts everyone at risk, and I don't want that." Rei said.

"Yeah but.." Usagi started, but Mamoru stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.

"She's right Usako. She knows what is best for her. If she says she's not in a good place right now then she means it. We need to respect that." Mamoru said.

"But what if there is a battle." Usagi questioned.

"I don't trust my instincts right now Usa. I don't trust myself. I can't take that risk. With myself or anyone else. I'm sorry. I just can't." Rei said.

"We understand Rei." Mamoru said.

"Yeah. You're doing the right thing. Just remember we're here for you, and we'll help you thru this. You're not alone Rei." Minako said.

"Yeah but." Usagi started, but stopped.

"No Usako. No buts. Rei is doing the right thing here. Don't ask her to put herself or anyone at risk." Mamoru said.

"I know. I just don't want her to give up." Usagi said.

"Usa, I'm not giving up. I'm having a set back, and doing what needs to be done to come back from that. I'm not quitting or taking time off. I'm still going to be here, but I'm not willing to put anyone at risk." Rei explained.

"Fine." Usagi groaned.

"You'll do hand to hand with Mamoru tonight." Minako stated.

"Alright." Rei agreed.

Mamoru smirked at Rei. "You realize I won't only be using my hands right? I have some roses with your name on them."

"Hey! At least I talked to you instead of being a bitch." Rei protested.

"I know, but you need to work off some anger, and physically is a good way to do it. We both know you're not going to take a real swing at me so I'm going to push you to do it." Mamoru responded.

"Jerk." Rei glared.

"Oh you have no idea." Mamoru smirked.

"Are you going to transform?" Usagi asked.

"No. I don't trust myself." Rei responded.

Usagi and Minako walked back to the group. Mamoru walked up to Rei, and put his hand on her shoulder.

"Thank you. I know that was hard to do, but thank you." Mamoru said quietly.

"I don't want to repeat the same mistakes. I don't want to risk losing my family again. I had to do it." Rei admitted.

"I know. Lets get to work." Mamoru stated.

He transformed as he moved away from Rei. When he turned back, he had an almost evil grin on his face.

"Alright pyro. Lets see what you got." Mamoru said with a chuckle.

"Bring it on cape boy." Rei smirked.

"Cape Boy. I'll show you cape boy." Mamoru snapped, and launched a rose at her.

Rei easily dodged the rose. It didn't take long for her and Mamoru to move into hand to hand combat. He even attacked her a few times with his cane. The physical release was helping her feel a little more centered, not much, but some.

"So why did you forgive him?" Mamoru asked as he launched a rose at her.

"I did it for me, not him. If I didn't I would hold onto this forever. I can't do that to myself." Rei responded as she dodged the fast moving, steel tipped rose.

"That's true. Did he really offer to give you money or let you use his name to get things you want or need?" Mamoru questioned as he swung a kick at her.

"He did." Rei answered as she blocked his leg, and swung at his chest.

"How did that make you feel?"

"How I have always felt, less than important to him. It wasn't unexpected."

"I meant emotionally."

"As I said, less than important, but honestly he's not that important to me either. I've learned, especially over the last few months who my real family is. Who I can truly count on. Who will be there for me when I really need them. Who have taught me what family and love really feel like. He doesn't matter any more."

"Good. So why the emotional turmoil?"

"He made me angry. He reminded of everything I've been thru because of him. And honestly part of me believes he only apologized to save face, and in hopes I won't go to the police or press."

"Are you or were you considering doing that?"

"No. I just want to put it behind me, and move on with my life."

"What else are you angry about?"

"I wanted closure, but I don't feel like I got it. Plus he admitted to loving me, just not the way he should. How can a parent not love a child the way they're supposed to?"

"Because some people just don't know how to or can't love people the way they should. At least he admits it. Most people don't. It doesn't make anyone right or wrong, just different. Unfair, yes, but just how it is with some people."

"I guess."

"Just remember how many people you have who do love you as you deserve to be loved. There are 10 of those people right here in this clearing with you right now. Another, is home, asleep in his bed. He may be a little crazy, but you're his world Rei. I can think of two more off the top of my head that see you as another daughter to them. That number will grow as the years progress, and families expand. Take it from someone who knows, family some times is the one we create, not the one we're born into. I had no family when I meet all of you, now I have a whole mess of sisters, and a couple of brothers. That's the family I created. They matter most to me in this world, and I can promise you that you matter most to them too."

"That's true."

"Of course it is. Just remember we're all here to get you thru this, ok?"

"I will. Thanks Mamoru."

"Of course. Now are you going to get serious about this or am I going to kick your ass here?"

"OH. I was just taking it easy on you cape boy. It's on now."

Rei went at Mamoru like she was going to punch him, but when he went to block with his arm, she swept his legs out from under him with one of hers. He popped back up quickly, and sent a kick to her stomach. They fought back and forth like that until Minako called a halt to training. Rei was winded, but she felt a little better. The physical activity definitely helped her work off some of her anger.

"Thanks Mamoru. I needed that." Rei said as they walked back toward the group.

"I could tell." Mamoru stated.

"You could?" Rei questioned.

"Oh yeah. You had the your "I'm pissed off no one mess with me look" on your face. The only other people here who might have been able to work off your temper with you are Haruka, and Jadeite. I figured Jadeite's been doing that already, and you might take it easy on him because you'll have to listen to him whine about being hurt. I knew you wouldn't worry about that with me." Mamoru admitted.

"You're probably right about Jadeite." Rei said with a giggle.

"Of course I am."

"Don't get cocky."

"Me? Never."

Rei snorted as they joined the rest of the group. They listened to Minako as she gave out pointers to people, then Rei and Jadeite left.

"So how badly did you kick Mamoru's ass?" Jadeite asked after a few minutes of silence.

"Not too bad. He'll only have a few bruises." Rei admitted.

"He'll survive." Jadeite stated.

"Yeah."

"So meditate then sleep or just sleep tonight?"

"Just sleep. I'm still too much of a mess."

"That's fine, but tomorrow we're back on track. You need to work on controlling your emotions when they're this high."

"Yeah. I know. I just needed a day or two."

"I get it."

"Thanks Jad."

"How long are you going to let Usagi keep your henshi pen?"

"Until I get my emotions back under control. I know I need to be able to do my job no matter my emotional state, but I knew tonight would have been a bad night to try."

"I understand, and I think they did too. You did the right thing."

"I know."

They had just entered their bedroom at the shrine when Rei saw grandpa sitting on her bed.

"Grandpa! You're supposed to be asleep." Rei gasped.

"I know. I couldn't sleep so I thought I'd check on you. How was training tonight?" Grandpa asked.

"Um. I don't know what you're talking about." Rei responded.

"Rei Hino, you're a lot of things, but a liar isn't one of them. Please don't start now. I know, ok. I know everything. I just wanted to see how it went after everything yesterday." Grandpa explained.

"I know you know. I just…."

"Are so used to hiding it."

"Yeah."

"Well you don't need to hide it with me. Why do you think I'm so lax with you? I figure you've earned it, and I trust you."

"I understand."

"So how did it go?"

"I turned in my henshi pen until I'm emotionally in control again. I did hand to hand with Mamoru."

"Good boy that one. Did the physical activity help?"

"It did."

"Good. Now get back on the rest of your routine young lady."

"Yes grandpa."

"Good night Rei."

"Good night grandpa."

Rei shook her head as he shuffled out of her room. It was the first time he had ever actually brought up the fact that she was a senshi, and that he knew it. It was a little weird for her, but she appreciated it. It reminded her of how much he really did love her.

She and Jadeite got ready, and into bed in silence. She fell asleep in his arms, just like every night. Her last thought before she fell asleep was that she hoped she could get control of her emotions quickly, and get back on track.