Pain is something that Wei Wuxian is intimately familiar with. Pain is something he understands immensely. He lives with pain constantly and the pain of lightning ripping through his body is the physical kind that tears at all the cells in his body and rips his soul leaving him gasping in agony. If this had been a real possession how much worse would it all have been? He's been struck before by Madame Yu but that felt tame. That had been restrained and yet firm in its pain, but this was unbridled rage ripping across his skin.
His back is on fire when he stands back up, "Ahh, Sect leader Jiang bullies the weak!"
The murmurs of the crowd as they see nothing has changed. The crazy man is still crazy which means there's no possession. No possession means no Yiling Patriarch. No Yiling Patriarch means he can try to get away with all of this. Play up the madman and ignore how much looking at Jiang Cheng hurts him.
That grey hair… Lan Wangji's stripes…
That night Wei Wuxian bent the will of the man he trusted most in rage. That night he forced his brother's body to break into an unnatural shape and being. If there was anything he wanted to run from more than anything it was the knowledge that if Jiang Cheng didn't already know how to break his spell then he could have doomed his brother to be a misshapen beastman.
He could have done that to Shijie. He might have. That night is somewhat a blur of blood and screaming. If he closes his eyes he can taste the iron and the salt of his tears as they hardened on his face.
He can still feel his bones twisting inside him.
But it's a bit late for apologies to do anything now. It's a bit late for anything to go well. The only relief he has is that Jiang Cheng is not under his command. His will is free and therefore unlike a certain someone won't be able to empirically prove it by revealing the bond. No. He has an out.
So as always, he plays the fool. Like he doesn't see how much he hurts people. Like he isn't a cause of suffering both for survival and because frankly, he thinks Jiang Cheng knowing he's alive would hurt more than the relief that it's just another mad man playing with resentment. "So cruel! Just because I love many doesn't mean I'll date anyone who whips me sect leader Jiang."
The crowd is murmuring to each other, "I mean his playing was atrocious. Nothing like the Yiling Patriarch's."
"Not to mention that while the man was an insane monster he had class and refinement."
"And he was renowned for his looks and ways with women. Mo Xuanyu is a disgusting lech who flirts with man and animal alike."
Jiang Cheng growled the whip cracking at his feet, "Are you all stupid? Who else could summon Wen Ning but the real Wei Wuxian? You're him and I know it!"
The crack and snap along the ground as Wei Wuxian hides behind his only barrier, Lan Wangji. "Step aside Baihu. That one is mine."
This is the part where he sells him out. Where he just reveals him, and he's punished for his crimes. Where they put him through due justice, and he can't say he'd blame them. But all the same, he doesn't want to die. What he wants is to run and find peace because he knows there's nothing for him in Lotus Pier or at the Burial Mounds. There's nothing for him anywhere in this cultivation world but he wishes.
I really am scum
He waits to be revealed but Lan Wangji merely stands tall and firm, "Zidian failed. You have no grounds to detain him."
"Are you stupid! That's Wei Wuxian. There's no doubt in my mind or should be in anyone else!" Jiang Cheng points firmly and all he can do is try to mope in fear. "No one else could do any of this or are your senses clouded by all that fur?"
He twirls his greasy locks of hair and sways just a peak from his hiding, "Two beauties fighting over me is so lovely but really Mister Jiang you are far from my type. Despite the rumors I am very picky, oh the whorish moan lets out, "Older men aren't my thing but cats- ah, their barbs are so lovely. Yes, my type would be more towards a fine specimen like Hanguang-Jun!"
The growl under Lan Wangji's breath makes him jump in his skin and it's a struggle to keep a straight face. Either turn him in or throw him away completely in disgust. Just pick one and go.
Maybe he'll pity me enough to let me live.
"That's it!" It sounds like a dog enough to make him squirm in every part of his body as Jiang Cheng gets closer.
"Uncle," Jin Ling interjects, "This is Mo Xuanyu. He's just as disgusting and horrible as he was before. If not worse. If the Lan's want him then let them. He's worthless as a human being."
Truly worthless all considering his host never even developed a golden core. Expulsion was rather rare and more often it was the transformative punishment presented, but if the crime was serious and the cultivator didn't have a golden core or in some cases, they thought that it was too harsh a punishment they were just expelled. Really, it mostly was the prior and the look on Jin Ling said it all.
Lan Wangji's hand set and dug into his shoulder till Jiang Cheng finally retreated. "Fine. But I'm watching you because if you are Wei Wuxian you'll never see the light of day again."
The relief was palpable along with the frustration when Lan Wangji announced that they would be taking 'Mo Xuanyu' with them.
"Why? He's a cut-sleeve loon," Lan Jingyi sighed only to be jabbed by Lan Sizhui.
"Be nice. Didn't you see how much he's been physically abused? Besides, I don't think he's as mad as he plays."
Hmm?
"Pfft, what makes you say that?"
"He pointed us to the cave and stuff, didn't he?" This one is very sharp. He does wonder though how such a well-behaved student ended up marked as a Rabbit. Lan Sizhui seems the pinnacle of what Gusu Lan strives for while Lan Jingyi is mouthing off under his breath constantly. It's tonal whiplash in a sense.
"He's still a pain. Especially, since we have to deal with this donkey."
"I think it's nice to have an excuse not to rush back."
It may also give him excuses to escape and Wei Wuxian will take advantage wherever and whenever he can.
It just turned out it wouldn't be often. Oh, no, Lan Wangji is practically hovering over him the entire time and by the time they're at the gates of Cloud Recesses he's digging in the dirt and holding on to Little Apple for dear life. He doesn't care how big a scene he has to make he's not being dragged in. He promised himself he would never go back and he'd meant it! So he will whine and scream and show how much he hates this with every bone in his body even as he's tricked inside with no way out.
He'll make a scene in front of Lan Xichen if he has to- and he tries but that damn silencing spell gets in the way. All he can do is glower bitterly as Lan Wangji introduces him as a guest. Seriously, fuck his luck!
"Come now, it's not awful in here. I'll take you to the Jingshi," Lan Sizhui once again proving to be a gentleman and the Lan-est of the Lans he's met in a long time. He reminds him a lot of Lan Xichen in some regards yet still very different.
The ribbon still bothers him, and Wei Wuxian notes the small glances they get as they walk through. The kind that sting of familiar judgment and he can't help noticing the way that kindness has gained a stony sense like Lan Wangji replaced the parts that made him think of the first Jade. "I've been curious for a while now, but why do you have that ribbon?"
He stops Lan Sizhui when he tries to explain the purpose itself, "I mean, why does a kid who embodies the Lan customs and rules have a ribbon demoting them as a Rabbit." Actually, he'd seen a few ribbons and he wondered if Lan Qiren had got stricter in his old age… whatever that number was. Old enough to be crotchety and dull. "Hell, why are there so many in the first place?"
When he'd been a student there'd basically just been him and one other student and once he stopped breaking the rules constantly he stopped being punished. Wei Wuxian was just notoriously undisciplined.
"Most of us are from the Warren," he says it so plainly. Like it doesn't mean as much as it does. Like it doesn't mean… No, if Wei Wuxian thinks of things like that the pain will be too much. "I as well."
"Seems silly to make you broadcast that constantly. Especially if you've proven yourself."
"A Rabbit is a rabbit, senior."
"And a person is a person."
He only receives silence. The kind that speaks of how uncomfortable those words are and it makes his chest hurt. To grow up with a constant reminder that you're not human- to literally wear a collar around your head as a sign of so-called pride that only brings shame…
Wen Yuan… what kind of life would you have lived if you'd been left in that cage? Would you have grown up like this boy? Or would it have been worse?
"He had enough talent that in a time of peace he would have been raised to be a proper Wen."
"To be a warmonger?" He'd spat.
"Policies like the one Wen Ning was raised under were new. If it had been before Wen Ruohan put them into action he would- Wen Ning would have had a normal life along with A-Yuan. In fact, A-Yuan would have been adored and commended for his heritage. He may have even been granted titles and land if he proved himself enough."
"Well, none of us get a normal life anymore. Not even you." Why had he been so callous with his words then? Why had he been cold to her? To them? Why?
He'll never forget the look in those eyes. Like Wen Qing had truly seen into the pits of hell and while he knows she's not a proper cultivator her skills with magic were more than sufficient... Because you need a Wen to teach this spell.
To make a proper crow. "You're right. But I am grateful we get to live as we are now."
His throat clenches with bile as he's lead into the Jingshi. "I appreciate your sentiment, but it be wise to refrain from that sort of language here. For the sake of saving face on your part."
"I'm a cut-sleeve so there's not much to save in the first place," He laughs before being forced into the Jingshi in the politest manner possible.
"All the same, you seem like a good person despite everything. You deserve better," The words are too kind for Wei Wuxian.
"You as well." He looks so embarrassed by it all. How depressing.
Lan Sizhui turns, "Um, I know Hanguang-Jun is somewhat… I know he isn't human completely but he's kind and if he brought you here it was out of that more than anything. So please stop trying to run away."
Just like that the door slams shut, and he's left in Lan Wangji's living quarters and if the thrumming on the door is anything to go by, they sealed him in with a talisman. "Guess he really wants to catch me for himself."
It's all so minimalistic which he expects. There are scratch marks along some of the surfaces though they're all small and look accidental. Wei Wuxian rubs over some of the claw marks that have been left along his skin. It must have hurt to grow them in, but it must be worse to not have control especially for someone like Lan Wangji.
"Baihu… So that's how his cultivation has formed," He'd noticed it was there for a time, but the shape was unknown. What the monster would be… He's just glad he can't see that shit anymore.
Human. He's just human.
Lan Wangji isn't though, and it feels like a cruel irony. A joke from a mocking hand of fate.
Given how good Lan Zhan is at everything though it was somewhat inevitable.
There's not much to distract him. Not even books or scrolls that Lan Wangji had been using prior. No, just a spartan room that reeks of a lonely man. It's not surprising given Lan Wangji's solitary nature.
Thirteen years... thirteen years and the statue never found love. Kind of sad.
Oh, like you're one to talk
He rolled onto the floor bored and just intending to nap when he found the loose board and the jars of Emperor's Smile. Well, maybe Lan Wangji wasn't as boring as he remembered.
They're dusty but clearly still delicious. "Sneaking in alcohol of all things. How naughty… Hmm, he also didn't really give way to my jabs either. The old Lan Zhan would have had a fit."
His smile leaves as he thinks of the look in those eyes, "But then again… if he's still under my influence that could affect how he sees me."
"Wait!" The gears turned firmly with a new realization, "No wonder he saved me. The spell I cast that night was designed to instill loyalty- which means… There's no way!"
He takes a bigger gulp of wine, "Yeah, absolutely no way that would ever happen. Not in a thousand years."
Still, keeping the charade up seemed as silly as holding back from finishing the jar in his hands. Lan Wangji knew it was him. Genuinely, knew. Or at least it was stupidly obvious given his lack of subtlety on Dafan. Seriously, how did he avoid getting caught?
His fingers run around the edge of the jar, "Being me comes with too much baggage. Far too much."
"I just need to steal a token and get out. That's all."
I don't deserve your loyalty. Not like this. Never like this
He's not sure how long he stays there just staring at the ceiling drifting in and out of sleep but he knows it's long enough for it to grow dark outside which means someone's likely at the bath. Breaking the seal on the door is child's play along with sneaking about towards the cold spring.
Right on schedule there's a robe sitting at the edge and uses a paperman, but he stops when he notices who's bathing. When he sees the stripes dashing across the skin and on that back are thick whipping scars that break the beauty of the pattern.
So many. So deep and wide.
It was easy to ignore with the white robes, but Lan Wangji was truly unnatural in his white skin and now that he could see the extent he saw those stripes where everywhere across his body. Right, tigers have striped skin and fur which means the smooth parts… He's still mostly skin but the light fur on his arms and the claws… The last time he'd seen Lan Wangji wade in the pool it had come above his waste now his unnatural height made him stoop just to reach that.
Then he saw the brand burned on his chest and a part of him screamed inside. He hadn't! There's no way! Lan Wangji… he wouldn't- he'd never do anything that would warrant such disgrace. Would mark him with a sun brand and make him… There has to be more to it!
Yes, surely!
Wei Wuxian didn't realize he'd leaned too far forward and snapped the branches underfoot. He's caught and he expects a reprimand or something but instead, all he gets is, "You need to wash." Lan Wangji pointed to a washbasin nearby, "Do that and come heal your bruises. They don't suit you."
"Us bath together! How shameless of you."
A blush creeps on to Lan Wangji's ears, "Not what I meant."
"Then you mean I bathe with the other disciples? If I go to the more public bathing area, then I might get taken by my lust but if you insist I will."
Splash!
He's like an overgrown zealous cat. Wei Wuxian takes in the perked ears and slit eyes and takes it back.
Lan Zhan is an overgrown zealous cat
The old cracked makeup runs off his face as he sits in the cool spring in heavy robs all while Lan Wangji forces the soap in his hands. "I get it. I'll wash, just give me space."
He's surprised when not only is he but Lan Wangji leaves altogether. It's just him, his wash materials, waterlogged robes, and cold water he doesn't want to be in.
At least his face isn't as much of a horribly bruised mess after some soaking and it does cure aches inside him. He doesn't get another chance that evening to run. No, he's back in the Jingshi eating a quiet meal as they both walk around the real subject.
Gosh, never thought I'd be wearing white robes again. That must be remedied.
"You're not a prisoner," Lan Wangji says as he shows him the daybed he'll be using.
"And yet you won't let me go."
"You can leave when you're honest with me."
Honesty is not his strong suit. Instead, he reaches for those claws. "Does it hurt"
"Not especially."
That brand is just out of sight, but it burns his eyes. The silence held as they stare before he's told, "Goodnight, Mo-gongzi."
The sting of those words.