[Homura]
"Are you getting ready for bed?"
[00:34]

[Madoka]
"yes"
[00:35]

Madoka is lying under the covers in her pajamas, the only thing alight in her room being the screen of her phone as she texts Homura. All she does is lie there, waiting for a response. It's been like this for a few hours.

[Homura]
"Are you okay?"
[00:40]

[Madoka]
"yes. why?"
[00:41]

[Homura]
"You have been acting different, lately. If something is wrong, you can tell me."
[00:41]

She had been hoping she wouldn't notice. Perhaps the awkward distance she put between herself and her friends over the past few days was too much of a tell. Maybe it was going to the counselor, and then her mother getting him fired for what he said. Maybe it was the constant staring. Maybe it was everything together. She isn't sure what exactly was the tipping point, but surely Homura would have been the first to notice. She always is.

Although, it's difficult for her to keep the whole homosexuality thing a secret as she'd like to when she's always stuck uncontrollably gawking at her friends' "assets" whenever they're around. They'd find out eventually. And what happens then? She knows by now that it's fine to be that way, but not everyone is as understanding as her mother. She's scared of Hitomi's reaction in particular; losing an old friend just a month after seeing her after years apart would be too much, especially for something as impossible to change as this.

And shit, what would Homura think? That's the scariest question to her of them all. Even if everyone else shunned her, she could still be content if at least Homura stayed. Why? Is it just because she's attracted to her? She's attracted to all of her friends, if she's being honest with herself. But this is different. She could say, "I love you.": the same thing she says to her mother and father on occasion, but it wouldn't be the same kind. Her mother had once told her about these types of things. That the love she had for her was different from the love she had for her husband — Madoka's dad. She hadn't actually thought much about it at the time. Maybe she was just too young, or unconcerned. Maybe it was not realizing that she isn't like the other girls in that way.

A wave of guilt and doubt overcomes her, if it hadn't already. She throws an arm over her eyes, feeling as if she's going to cry in frustration from the sheer amount of introspection... Which has also left her lost in thought for the past ten minutes, and she then realizes that she has been completely silent. It feels like she just got punched in the stomach, which turns out to be...oddly familiar. In an effort to not lose the conversation and in the hopes that Homura hasn't fallen asleep waiting, she tries her best to type out some sort of excuse.

[Madoka]
"i love you"
[00:50]

Well, she had intended to make up an excuse, but that ended up coming out instead. She freezes up when she realizes what she just sent. And she thinks, "I guess I knew what it was, after all."

[Homura]
"I love you too."
[00:51]

"I just had to say it to myself." she finishes upon reading the reply. And those feelings keep creeping back, over and over, "It's not the same. It's not the same way. When I say it and when she does, it's not the same." She turns the screen off and sets the phone aside, curling up in her covers as if they're a cocoon.

"Why am I like this? Why do I have to doubt everything? I should be happy to have so many people who care about me, but why do I feel so bad all of the time? Why can't I just SAY IT!?" But she did. She had said it so many times over. And every time felt different; worse, about herself. A churning feeling in her gut. That outburst about the guy that wanted to confess to Homura. The constant clinging to her even when she thought it was a bother. The staring, the fantasies, the dreams... Why did she think it was okay to fall asleep in the lap of someone she was barely friends with? Her blush deepens, madly, until she can't bear to show her face to the empty room in front of her, and covers it with both hands.

Then, a ding. Her phone's screen turns on. A message.

[Homura]
"I don't know what you're going through, but I'll be here no matter when you need me. Remember that you are you. And you are perfect just the way you are."
[1:00]

She doesn't know why, but reading that makes her eyes start to well up. That, right there, is such a "Homura" thing to say that she can't help but smile knowing that despite anything that happens, Homura will also still be Homura. And then...something hits her. A sense of nostalgia unfamiliar to her. As if she's heard that a hundred and one times before. Maybe two. But more solidly than that...she's heard that before. Maybe she had said it in the past? She starts to go back through their texts together to find out, coming upon the same phrase again about two weeks prior. But more interesting than that...

"Wait, what?" she says to herself, sitting up suddenly. She starts rapidly scrolling and reading through everything Homura has said, and they all seem vaguely familiar in some way. It's just a hunch, but she turns the lights on and hurriedly sits at her desk, pulling open a drawer where she had been keeping all of those letters that were anonymously written to her over the past month.

She starts reading them again, one by one, finding that they all share a similar style of phrasing. Always brief, typically one or two sentences. Always either ordinary rhetorical questions or statements of reassurance. As if the sender either had self esteem issues or knew that she had them. But she never gave off the aura of lacking self esteem, even if she openly admitted to a few of her friends that it was true. But none of them wrote like this, so plainly and without flair. Sayaka always tries to sound non-serious, and so does Kyouko. Hitomi often uses a large vocabulary to show off, and doesn't know about Madoka's issues too well. Kyousuke is irrelevant. Mami and the rest don't know her well enough. The only one she knows who writes like this, speaks like this, has such a...practical style, is...

"Oh my god." she whispers to herself upon noticing that what Homura had just sent matches up almost word-for-word with one of the letters. And then she remembers that this is also practically the same thing she said when she first they first met. She doesn't know how she didn't see it before, maybe just a reasonable blind spot...

And then, she goes back to another. It reads simply, "I love you." And another, on the same topic, "I cannot properly express my feelings towards you, no matter how strong they are. I hope this is adequate to get the point across."

Her entire body starts to heat up. Primarily the stomach area. A warm, fuzzy feeling mixed with an intense pain in her chest. She clutches it tightly and starts to cry, "Oh... Oh my god, Homura... It has to be..." She starts shaking her head, smiling like an idiot and silently berating herself for being so stupid as to have any doubts in the first place. She gathers all of them up in a pile and hugs them, a if she were hugging the girl herself.

Of course, this swarm of butterflies eventually fades a few minutes later when she comes to a sudden realization: How does she confront Homura about this? If the letters are accurate, she herself is probably too insecure to consider making the first move. But if Madoka does it, will she not be too scared of the commitment to respond? She had always thought Homura was this totally cool, perfect example of...something. But to realize that all of these admissions of fault came from her is both too endearing for her to not obsess over AND worrying to the point of coming full circle.

She would ask her mother for help, but she's asleep by now. So instead, she has to rely on...

"...Eh?" Sayaka grunts as her phone starts vibrating like a magic wand. She picks it up tiredly and asks, "Yes? This is Sayaka."

"Sayaka?" Madoka asks rhetorically.

"That's my name."

"Listen, I need to tell you something."

"Mm. Alright, just..." she horks down a handful of chips "...What is it?"

Interrupting, Kyouko nudges her in the leg, "Oi, don't eat all of them! Wait, who's that?"

Sayaka pushes her back, "It's Madoka."

"What's up?"

"Well if you'd let me—!"

Madoka, tired of them bickering, yells for the first time in maybe a week, "Sayaka! Listen!"

Sayaka hushes Kyouko and responds, "Ah, yeah, sorry. So what is it?"

"I think..." Madoka starts "No, I'm positive that Homura is the one writing those letters."

Suddenly, Sayaka goes from being aloof and tired to alert, "W-Wait, what? Really!?" and then she chokes briefly on the chips she was chewing.

"Yes! I was just comparing them to some things she's texted me and...it matches! Like, it's almost exactly the same! And..." she pauses.

"And...?"

"...Kyouko is there, right? Can I talk to her?"

Sayaka raises an eyebrow at this. The two barely ever talk, and about something this important... Well, she hands it over anyways, "Hey, Kyouko, she wants to talk to you." That "you" being in the most sassy tone imaginable.

Kyouko doesn't bother rolling her eyes like usual and just takes the phone, "Yo, Madoka, what's up?"

"You heard that, right?"

"Heard what?" she starts nibbling on a chip.

"I think Homura is the one writing those letters to me. No, I know she is. It just makes too much sense!"

"Oh." Kyouko says, not even vaguely surprised.

"...'Oh'?" Madoka asks incredulously.

"Yeah. 'Oh.'" Kyouko confirms "I mean, I already kind of figured it was her, because..." She looks back at Sayaka, who is listening intently. She hesitates in her words. "Uh, hold on..." She gets up and just walks right out the door, saying she'll be right back. Thankfully, Sayaka doesn't have enough of a clue to eavesdrop.

Once she's clear of earshot, Kyouko continues, "So, I know I told her I wouldn't tell anyone else, but you kind of already figured it out. I was hanging out with her the other day and...she basically came out to me. So yeah, I was guessing it was her."

"Wow, really?" Madoka asks. "What did she come out as?"

"Lesbian."

For some reason, that makes Madoka feel relieved. Now she knows "there's no way some pickup artist will ever steal her". "...Whoops." she says as she realizes that she actually said that aloud.

Kyouko snort-chuckles at that, "Damn, well now I know how you feel. Gotta say, I never figured you to be the possessive type!"

Madoka wants to get mad. She really, really wants to get mad at that. But she restrains herself, "...Anyways, I need help. I don't know if I should confront her or not. I know you get along with her better than Sayaka, so what do you think?"

Well, that's a hard one. So hard she actually has to stop and think about it for a moment. She decides to ask first, "Well...how about you? What do you think of her?"

Madoka gets caught off-guard, as proven by her silence. On one hand, she's about to come out to someone, which she was just obsessing over the fear of. On the other, Kyouko seems to have taken Homura's whole thing pretty well, so maybe it's safe. On that note, she asks, "You said she came out to you, right? What do you think that?"

Kyouko feels like this is a trap, and thus hesitates to answer. But then she realizes that they're literally just playing catch with each other. So she says honestly, "Well of course I just accepted it. I mean, why not? Love is love."

Madoka doesn't know how to respond at first. But then she starts giggling, "Wow... Love is love. And Homura is Homura...and I'm me." she starts giggling harder at the revelation of how ridiculous this game of cat and mouse is. So she finally answers, "I... I think I'm in love with her. And I think I have been for a while and just didn't realize it until someone told me I could be like that. So... I mean, I guess I could like just about anybody, but I like her right now."

Kyouko leans against the wall and smiles contently, "Yeah, that's nice. I feel the same, ya know. I got a girl I like, too. You'll never—"

"Is it Sayaka?"

"Son of a...!" Kyouko nearly yells, but holds back, "...Is it that obvious?"

"I...well, I was just guessing. You two are really close, and since you just said that you liked a girl..."

Kyouko sighs, "Right, I guess I just walked into that one, huh? Well, listen..."

But Madoka interrupts again, "Wait... We're all gay?"

"...I guess so." Kyouko agrees after a moment of thought. She chuckles, "Well isn't that neat? Screw opposites; lesbians attract!"

They both start giggling uncontrollably about how stupid that joke was before Kyouko resumes her previous thought, "Anyways, listen... I think you should tell her. Or, well, I guess it depends on what she wants. Tell you what, I'll talk to her tomorrow and figure out what's happening. Don't want her to get cold feet, after all. But you might have to take the initiative. God knows she's too stubborn. Had to jump through hoops just to make her admit it to me. AFTER I did! After! I mean jeez."

"Yeah..." Madoka agrees quietly "She can be like that. But...I still want to do this. I know that if I don't, she might just lose interest and move on. And..."

Kyouko wants to tell her, "I doubt that'll ever happen." but doesn't want to encourage any more lethargy or games of "will-they-won't-they?" that'll go on for years. Not enough time for that. So instead, she stays quiet.

"...So you'll talk to her?"

"Right."

"Tomorrow?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. Thanks, Kyouko. I know we don't talk much, but you're really a good person, aren't you?"

Kyouko just about loses her composure, getting so embarrassed about that. She mutters, "Yeah, yeah... I can see why she would like you."

"What?"

"Nothing." Kyouko speaks up "Anyways, get some rest. Me and Sayaka are gonna be up for a little while, but you need rest for what's comin' up."

"Okay. Tell her I said goodnight."

"Yes ma'am." Kyouko salutes and says sarcastically, even though nobody can see her. She hangs up, goes back in, and gets back to their usual activities. When Sayaka prompts her with what that was about, Kyouko just responds, "You'll see."

Madoka, meanwhile, goes to bed anxious-yet-happy and can barely sleep at all. Much alike, Homura just plain doesn't sleep. Not that it would affect her too badly given the whole deific status, but it would still be preferable to get some amount of rest. Not that she would let herself.

And the sun would soon dawn, and open the gates to a tense day.