Chapter 17 - The Brink Of Sanity

Tyler and Hank had finally reached a point where they could slow down a little bit. Most of their patients were ready to either stay where they were or move on to rest somewhere safe. But that didn't mean that the two of them were done. But of the two, Tyler had truly poured himself into fixing everything he could and even tried to fix a few things he knew going in were a long shot.

But it was the first time since Billy had shown up lost in his visions that Tyler could actually stop for a minute, and the full-body sensation of buzzing and falling at the same time had left him in a daze.

He'd just left the area where the horsemen were being kept, and he had to sit down in the quiet hall, his arms resting on top of his knees where he'd slid down the wall. As much as he wanted to help whoever he could, this … this last month or so had been absolute hell. The injuries that had piled up … none of them were simple cases. And every time he'd thought he'd worn himself out fixing one or another, someone else would come in on the brink of death, and Tyler found himself pushing harder to get there - to stop them from tumbling over the precipice into the other side.

He never imagined that he'd see so many of them so fast - or that they'd be in such rough shape.

He hadn't told anyone, but between cases, when he was too worn out to actually do anything, he'd gone in to check on Logan and K more than once. He couldn't do anything for them, but he could lay his hand on them and see if they had been improving. But it was just so slow … it had been hard to tell for sure until they took off in their recovery and woke up enough to eat.

He still had enough people he was watching over that he could help, so he was still worn out - and there wasn't enough space in his stomach to fuel up enough to put a dent in what he needed to build his energy.

He'd only been there for a little while, though he had no good marker for time anymore, when Tammy made her way over to check on him. She was as quiet as she knew how to be - cheating only a little when she levitated herself closer so he wouldn't hear footfalls.

"Hey, stranger," she said with a wry smile, then gently touched down and came to sit with him.

He looked up with a weary but warm smile that only grew warmer as he watched her curl into his side. "I was on my way up," Tyler said quietly. "You didn't have to come here."

"I had a feeling you might need me to come your way … just for how hard you've been working." She took his arm and leaned her head against him as she held on. "You've been so good since the whole start of this … look at all the superheroes you saved."

Tyler let out a snort of a laugh as he shifted to put his arm around her and pull her closer, though he didn't try too hard before he scooted her way instead, being particularly gentle with his pregnant wife. "Like a whole year's worth of work packed into a month." He sighed heavily and kissed her temple. "I'm looking forward to going home with you."

"Yeah, me too," she agreed, then didn't wait much longer than a moment or two before continuing her thoughts. "So … How much longer do you think it'll be before we can head home? I know construction's moving on the school - I keep hearing Mr. Stark talking about concrete and his army of contractors, so it can't be long for them here."

"Yeah, I don't know," Tyler admitted with a weary sigh that carried the weight of how worn he was when he thought of all of it. "I need to make sure that the ex-horsemen are all okay. Sying and Amadi I think are okay, physically anyhow … I'm worried about the other two."

"I think everyone is." She leaned in to redirect him with a kiss that lingered and went on more than they usually considered appropriate in a common area. "But you don't have a chance of healing anyone when you're this worn out. Let your dad keep an eye on things for a night. You know Gerry is dying to pitch in more. You need to rest. With me."

Tyler's smile stretched out slowly, then he looked down the hall. "I need to talk to Dad first-"

"No, you don't. I already talked to him while you were catnapping in the hall."

"Oh. We're into puns already, huh?"

Tammy nodded, her smile growing wider every second. "I can't help it. It's the influence of our sweet little Tristan trying to cheer up Jayce."

"That … I believe that," Tyler laughed, then turned with a little growl to pick her up as he got to his feet. "You said there was somewhere we could curl up that wasn't a hallway?"

"You're not hungry?"

"Didn't say that," Tyler said. "But I'm prioritizing … and you're always at the top of my list. Even if I might seem preoccupied dealing with super drama."

Hank, meanwhile, wasn't with any of the usual patients. Instead, Teddy had tracked him down, pulling him into the room where Billy was still out. They'd tried waking him up when Apocalypse died, but the galaxies weren't back, and Billy seemed to flicker in and out of seeing reality, so they'd let him sleep again until the death spore was gone. That, finally, seemed to break whatever lingering hold was left on the Horsemen, so it stood to reason that it would have an effect on Billy.

At least, that was what Teddy was hoping. He didn't want to admit out loud that he was terrified Apocalypse had done something far more permanent, like he'd done to Kitty. But if this didn't work, if Billy's stars weren't back… Teddy didn't know what he'd do.

He knew this was the last time they could try it and have a reasonable explanation for the missing stars. So now, Teddy was dreading what he'd see as Hank loaded up a stimulant for Billy. What would he even do if Billy was perpetually stuck in other realities?

It took a few minutes, but Billy finally started to stir. Just like the last time, when Tyler had turned off his powers back when this all started, he seemed wary, agitated, and outright scared, but Teddy didn't care about that part. The part he cared about was the stars.

They were back.

"Hey, handsome," Teddy said, every word dripping with relief that had Hank holding his breath and hoping the two of them could connect enough to ground Billy. He wasn't as easily convinced that their Wiccan was back just from the physical signs alone.

Especially since Billy simply turned Teddy's way and frowned, wordlessly holding his breath as if he was bracing himself for something terrible. And he probably was, considering the kinds of realities Apocalypse had likely shown him.

"Billy," Teddy said gently, "It's me. You're back. It's me." As he said it, he leaned in and kissed his husband, though when Billy pulled back slightly, he didn't push. Billy didn't… didn't do that.

Hank frowned and stepped forward. "Apocalypse is dead," he told Billy, trying to catch his gaze, even though Billy was looking around now as if he was waiting for something terrible to follow that statement. "His influence is gone. You're back home."

Billy was quiet for a far longer time than Teddy was comfortable with before, finally, he looked toward Teddy, searching his expression as the galaxies in his eyes finally started to move again, showing some life instead of a blank stare. His throat was dry from how long he'd been out as he quietly asked, "You can see me?"

Teddy nodded, grabbing Billy's hand in his. "You never left," he whispered. "You've been watching other worlds, but you never left."

Billy looked down at Teddy's hand, obviously trying to process the situation but not trusting it at all. "Sometimes I… sometimes I'm a participant. A ride along…." He looked up at Teddy again. "You can hear me?"

Teddy nodded wordlessly.

Billy was quiet again for a long time before he shifted his hand in Teddy's so he could hold it. "So, where did I end up?"

"Billy," Teddy said gently, "you never left. That's what we've been trying to tell you."

"I don't recognize anything," Billy said, sounding almost apologetic. "I'm sorry I'm not-"

"Oh!" Teddy shook his head quickly. "No, no, the mansion got leveled by Horsemen, and the Tower is totally compromised. This is one of Tony's hideouts."

"Oh." Billy looked around again, biting his lip as he thought it over. "...Sammy and Harry…?" he asked at last, tentatively.

"They're okay," Teddy promised. "They've been getting stuffed by the Hale sisters."

For some reason, that was the first thing Billy had smiled at. "That sounds like our reality."

"That's what I've been trying to tell you," Teddy said. "You're home. With me. You're okay."

Billy nodded, as if he was confirming the truth to himself, and then suddenly threw his arms around Teddy's shoulders, holding tightly to him. He wasn't crying or even trying to get a kiss - he just needed to know that his husband was there and was using Teddy like an anchor as he tried to cement himself into this reality.

So Teddy let him hang on for however long he needed it. "You're okay," he said into Billy's shoulder. "I got you."

Sying was sleeping on the floor again.

He was never aware of it when it happened, and he didn't like waking up curled in on himself on the ground, but for some reason, he kept defaulting to that position when he was upset. When it happened, he would always wake up thinking, in the brief moment before he was fully conscious, that he was about to see Andri'i or that he was going to receive orders from a weapons director.

But there he was, sleeping on the floor beside the cot in his room, his back to the wall.

Krissy's ears drooped when she saw the state of her husband, her heart breaking when she knew he must have been reliving any of the many traumas he'd been through. She had hoped to come visit him and lift his spirits now that the black sparks were gone, but now, she was almost afraid to approach him, knowing he still hadn't had much human interaction because of the sparks and knowing he could very well think he was being manhandled.

"Sying," she said softly, gently, hoping his enhanced hearing would pick up on her voice and he'd wake up that way.

Thankfully, it seemed Sying had been sleeping lightly anyway - probably because he didn't seem to feel safe enough to relax and sleep deeply - and he looked up at her and managed a small smile her way, even if he seemed dismayed to have woken up on the floor again. "Hey, pretty girl."

"Hey yourself," she said as she made her way over. "I came to invite you back to my place, if you're interested."

Sying raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure that's okay?"

She gestured to his hands. "Not like you're gonna hurt me if we curl up and sleep off all the crap that's happened lately."

He waved one spark-free hand and shook his head. "No, no, I get that. I just meant… I can leave? I mean, I thought I was supposed to stay in here." He paused, adding a bit too late, "You know. To be safe."

Krissy sighed and pulled him over so he was snuggled under her chin. "You're supposed to be with me," she said firmly. "And with us." She brought his hand over and put it on her stomach. She wasn't anywhere close to showing, but she wasn't above using that play all the same. "You're not War anymore, Sying."

"I know," he said softly. He kept his head under her chin and his hand on her stomach, breathing in sync with her until he added, still whispering, "It's hard to know what I'm supposed to do. It feels like… like when I had directives and orders, that was right, and being directionless…"

Krissy kissed the top of his head and ran her hand over his neck, shoulders, and back. "No one likes not knowing what's next."

"It's different, though," Sying tried to explain. "If I'd grown up in Dad's universe, I'd just be orders. Not much else. Right?" Krissy frowned and pulled back to look at him, and he met her gaze. "Kris, that's what it was like, and it felt good. What am I supposed to do with that?"

Krissy watched him, taking in the hurt and the fear in his eyes, before she leaned in to kiss him. "So, I guess, now we know you've got some programming in you like that. Think you can reprogram yourself to focus on being a dad, please?" She wasn't trying to make light of the situation, but she honestly didn't know how to help him. That sounded like a Noh problem. Or a Rachel problem. Or a Logan problem. She didn't know what else to do, so she'd just keep reminding him of the family he'd chosen for himself. "I need you," she admitted, unable to stop the tears in her eyes when pregnancy hormones were terrible things, really.

Sying bit his lip as he watched her and then nodded, pulling her into a tight hug. "I'm here," he swore. "I'm here, I promise. I'm here."

Rachel and Anton Wright had never seen their daughter so withdrawn.

Leslie Ann had always been social and fearless. She had been the one to march up to Scott and call him "uncle" for the first time when he was dating Annie. She had talked Logan into a trip to Japan. She had been outspoken during her time with the Avengers. She had her brushes with depression because of the losses she'd suffered as a teenager, but nothing like this.

Even though she was allowed out of the room she'd initially been kept in, she stayed hidden in her new room, keeping to herself even when someone came to check on her. She hadn't been able to look Annie in the face at all - especially since she knew Cody had died, and she didn't want to see how hurt her aunt was when she'd been part of Apocalypse's team. She didn't talk to any of her friends from either team. And even Anton, who had always been her go-to when she'd been a daddy's girl her whole life, could only get a good hug out of her and not much in the way of conversation.

But even with as much time as she was spending in her room, she wasn't sleeping. Not when even exhaustion-fueled sleep resulted in nightmares that left her screaming.

Anton came in when he heard her yelling, but she wasn't fully aware of what was happening, even if she was awake. She was lost again in all the anger and fear of all the people she'd drained, and when that happened, she had no idea who or where she was.

"Oh, baby girl," Anton said in a sigh as he quickly crossed the room to wrap her in a hug. She kicked and hit him as soon as he did, but he didn't let her go until she calmed down enough to realize who was holding her - and that was enough to remind her which mind was hers in the sea of writhing emotions. It was a good thing Nate had temporarily blocked her access to her powers, too, because she could have done him even worse damage if she'd been able to pull wood into the fight.

All at once, she clung to her dad, hanging on as tightly as she would do when she was a kid. It always hurt when that psychic feedback hit. She was shaking and taking short breaths, but even when she had a hold of herself, she didn't feel better. She was tired and angry and hurt and bitter. Bitter that Apocalypse had done this to her, bitter that she couldn't sleep without remembering what she'd done at his orders, bitter that Nate had taken her powers, bitter that Thor had let her live.

That was always where she ended up, too. As far as she was concerned, she couldn't come back from all that had happened. She could still hear echoes of other people in her mind. She couldn't sleep. She couldn't function. This wasn't life.

She kept reliving the last moments of people's lives while she kept living. At least they weren't hurting anymore.

Her dad was rubbing circles in her back like he used to do when she was a kid and had nightmares about silly things like monsters in the closet, but she didn't relax. Not entirely. She was too exhausted to hide her anger, but she was too tired to do anything but seethe.

"Why don't I get you some hot chocolate," Anton offered at last. "You didn't hardly touch dinner."

That was putting it mildly. Leslie Ann hadn't eaten anything at all yesterday. She didn't want to. And if she was honest, she liked feeling empty, because it was almost like that chasm that had kept the feedback of her powers away from her. She wanted that again; she wanted not to have to think about anything but that hole.

Besides, what did it matter if she ate or not?

"I'm not hungry," Leslie Ann said, pulling back from him.

"Leslie Ann-"

"I'm not." She pushed her hand forward, an instinct that would have been deadlier if she'd had her powers. Instead, Anton only saw the palm of her hand pointed his way and watched as she realized she'd tried to attack him. He saw her expression shift, and he saw her shoulders drop until she reached around him to find her covers and pull them up over her shoulders. "I'm fine. Go to sleep, Dad."

"Baby girl," he said quietly, "you're not fine."

"It doesn't matter," Leslie Ann said, pulling her blankets in tighter.

"It matters to me," Anton said, resting a hand on her shoulder.

When it was clear, though, that Leslie Ann was determined to stay right there pretending to be asleep, Anton sighed and got to his feet. He was too upset to go back to sleep, so instead, he went for a walk in the halls.

He knew his daughter wasn't well. And he knew that she'd given up on herself. But he didn't know what else he could do. So he went for a walk to clear his head, not terribly surprised to see a few people here and there doing the same. Scott was bent over a newspaper with coffee, but Anton wasn't going to interrupt his thoughts. Not when he could see Scott wasn't really reading it. And Kaleb had fallen asleep on the couch with his arm around Sadie, though she was slipping out from underneath his arm without waking him. And at the other end of the common area, Bobby was sitting with a coffee cup watching the ice climb up the sides and then back down again.

Outside of Scott, Bobby was the closest thing to a familiar face Anton had, since they'd been together at the Chicago school for years. So, Anton got himself a mug and sat down by Bobby with a quiet, "Yeah, me too."

"I'll bet," Bobby agreed quietly. "How's she doing?"

"She's not," Anton admitted, frowning at the mug he hadn't drunk out of yet. "At all."

"Yeah. Rachel either."

Anton nodded, falling quiet until he had a drink of coffee. "She hasn't eaten that I've seen. Doesn't want to do anything. Even that."

"Pretty common complaint after being possessed by a megalomaniac," Bobby said dully. "Just keep trying. Anything anytime can be what gets her to snap out of it, and if she is really stubborn about it … well, there are things Hank can do for that, too."

"Yeah, I know. That's what's keeping me up."

"I'm sorry she's going through it," Bobby said, looking up at Anton finally, then started to absently trace designs in the frost on his mug. "If you think I might be able to help … just tell me what you want me to do."

"She did always look up to you," Anton said with an almost-smile.

"God only knows why."

"You said it, not me," Anton said, finally cracking a smirk.

"Someone had to," Bobby agreed with the tiniest smile.

"Maybe if you could get her to eat at breakfast..." Anton said slowly.

"I can bring her a snow cone," Bobby deadpanned.

Anton smirked. "Might be the only thing she'd eat."

"Why not now?" Bobby said before he upended his coffee cup to reveal the shell of coffee that had been iced up.

Anton gestured broadly. "Be my guest. Lord knows there's nothing else to do right now if you're not a telepath or a super genius around here."

Bobby nodded, got to his feet and then headed to the kitchen to grab a bottle of cherry syrup, then headed down with Anton to see Leslie Ann. While Anton stayed out of sight, Bobby knocked on the doorframe and held up the syrup. "So. Um … I brought this for you. You look like you could use it."

Leslie Ann looked his way and then sat up with her blanket around her shoulders, one eyebrow raised. "O...kay…"

Bobby walked the rest of the way in and presented the bottle to her with a grin, until she finally reached out to take it with a look of suspicion. "It's good to see your vocabulary is improving."

She gave him a dry look for that one.

"So how do you want it?" Bobby asked, managing to get his expression under control. "Just … standard issue or high and fast?"

She shook her head at him. "I don't know. You pick."

Bobby let his shoulders drop before he picked up the glass of water on her bedside table and turned part of it into a snowball, then dropped it into her hands. "Just because you've had a rough week, I won't whip it at you." He gestured to the snowball. "Snow cone! See? Could have been an attack, but ..."

Leslie Ann looked between the snowball and Bobby and then snorted out a laugh she didn't mean to. "Cherry, really?"

"It was the first one I saw," Bobby promised as he sat down with her. "Next to a hideous-looking circus machine that I have no idea the purpose behind. But it's Stark's place, so who knows, really."

"He obviously forgot we have our own Sno Cone machine," Leslie Ann deadpanned.

"Oh, no," Bobby said, shaking his head. "I only give him snow cones that are high and fast. And aimed at his face."

She smirked again, shaking her head as she poured syrup on her snowball and handed the bottle to him. "Thanks."

"Any time," Bobby said, sitting back. "For the record, what do you like? Wheat grass? Green tea? Some other awful flavor that I can't even begin to imagine? Grape? If it's grape, I don't know if we can be friends."

She shrugged lightly. "Nothing, really. I'd rather be hungry."

Bobby let out a noise of disbelief then tossed a tiny, fluffy snowball at her. "Come on."

She flicked the snow off of her arm. "Really," she said.

"Really," he said, lobbing another one at her just to get her to react.

She instinctively held up a hand to stop the snowball and then glared at him, but when he simply met her gaze, she grit her teeth and tried to pull back the glare.

"Awww, come on. You almost smiled for a second there."

"I'm not really in the mood for a snowball fight, Bobby," she said tiredly.

"No one is when the snowball fights start," Bobby replied before he got frost climbing the walls. "But you're my fa-vorite."

She had to smile for that one, if only because he was so effectively turning the tables. "You're mine too," she said quietly.

"Because we're both amazing," Bobby said as he formed up another snowball, then whispered to her quietly, "I'll hit the next person who walks in that door in the face with this if you want. You can even put cherry syrup on it first."

Leslie Ann smirked and leaned back with her snow cone, carefully eating it as she sized up the door. "Tempting," she said, even as her stomach growled when she hadn't eaten in a while and it suddenly had food.

Instead of trying to start a real conversation, Bobby soaked his snowball with cherry syrup and then froze the whole thing a little harder to join her. He kept pace with her, nibbling on his frozen snowball at the same rate she was, letting her move things along.

Finally, she let out a slow sigh. "You probably have something better to do, you know."

"Not really, no," Bobby argued.

"What about Rachel?" she asked.

"Rachel is with the girls, I think they're braiding hair and eating popcorn." He smiled at her. "I didn't feel like the morning marathon of ponies or whatever. They hardly know I'm there when Mom's doing her thing anyhow."

"Oh. Well, good." She pulled the blanket around her shoulders tighter.

"I'm not sure if that's a cue to lighten up on the frost … or make it worse."

"You probably don't want to freeze yourself in here," she pointed out. "With me."

"That is both ridiculous to assume that I could freeze myself anywhere and silly that I wouldn't want to do it with you. I mean … it's not like ninjas in Japan with some attention hogs, but I think I do alright with the fun."

"You do," she promised quickly. "I'm the problem, not you."

Bobby scrunched up his nose. "How?"

"Because I don't want to be here, that's why!" Leslie Ann said - with more heat and hurt than she meant to.

"Well … where do you want to be?" Bobby asked, ignoring how angry she'd gotten over such a simple question. He'd seen it all over the years. Several times over. "I can go with you."

Leslie Ann gestured with one hand, waving it as she tried to find the right words. "No, I just - I don't-"

"So you don't want to go anywhere with me," Bobby said, frowning as he nodded slowly. "Okay…"

"Don't take it personally. I don't want to go anywhere with anyone," she clarified.

"Well I didn't figure it would be today," Bobby said.

"Yeah, well." Leslie Ann sighed and pulled her knees up. "Thanks for coming, Bobby."

"So is that a raincheck?" Bobby asked.

"Tell you what," she said, "we can go somewhere if I ever feel like being again. You'll be first on my list for life experiences. Ice skating with Bobby or something."

"Yeah, alright," Bobby said. "But if you don't want to, you don't have to."

She smiled tightly. "I promise," she said quietly, "if you'd asked me before all this, I'd have my bags packed in a second. I just… can't. I can barely even think sometimes."

"You can't right now, I know," Bobby said. "I don't think anyone can right now. I'm just looking for something to look forward to, you know?"

She nodded quietly, then leaned over so she was almost touching his shoulder with hers. "You're a good friend."

"You too."

Amadi had been glad to get away from the other horsemen. She was beyond grateful for her parents support and loving gestures. They were the rocks she knew were always there to anchor her in the storm, but … it was still a little surprising to her that they were there after everything she'd done … after all the misery she'd caused around the world - they were still there for her.

Which was great. It was, but she couldn't hardly look at her mother without remembering the look of determined fury on her face as they'd fought in the clouds. Which led to Amadi quietly distancing herself from her mother.

It was a subtle move, but Amadi was having enough trouble with nightmares and little things that no one noticed that she was doing … like the little tic she now had stretching her fingers out before she tried to use her abilities. And she was desperately trying to avoid doing that, too. Something about reaching for the winds scared her now in a way that she'd never felt before. She wasn't sure when or if she'd ever try for lightning again.

Which Amadi knew, would sooner or later be a tip off to her mother when she wasn't doing any of the weather tricks they'd done for fun. But she couldn't even attempt it yet. At all.

So instead, she found solace in her father's workshop. It was easier to take things apart that Forge wanted disassembled for parts than it was to face her mother's legacy and he powerset she was born with. It reminded her of before she got her powers and long before she was …

Amadi shook her head at the thought and studiously went back to disassembling Shi'ar components. It was too much to think of how she'd become a horseman, because when she started to think of that, all she wanted to do was to fly away. And when the impulse to fly hit her, she started to panic because that would mean harnessing the winds, which she could not do. At all.

She popped the power source off of the next board and carefully set it aside. Watching her father work up new tech from scavenged parts was relaxing and distracted her from her own troubles as she tried to see things the way he did. Tried to understand how he could seamlessly shift from one problem to the next as he created his tools that would solve other problems as he worked on his tech.

It seemed less … emotional than working with the weather - more straightforward and with better rules in place. And for the first time since she'd learned she'd inherited her mother's powerset, she wished that she'd have been a technopath like her father instead.

Amadi barely realized that she'd set her tools down as she watched Forge work - his focus glued to the alien tech in front of him - wide eyed and with a perfectly open expression. The expression that said whatever he was looking at was 'talking' to him.

But that was something she had to work at. And when she thought about it, she didn't actually want to have anything to do with tech, either. Because if she worked on tech, then she'd most likely have to cross paths with Sying and James.

With a frown, Amadi pushed back from her workbench as she gently set the tools to the side. Suddenly, even working with her father wasn't something that she wanted to do, either, and she hated that she could think of no outlet to distract herself.

She almost made it to the door of the workshop before Forge called out to her. "Had enough of the shop?"

Amadi shrugged, unwilling to speak up and say why when she'd been so engaged just moments before.

Forge nodded and set his things down and got to his feet. "How about a movie then?" he offered, and for an instant, Amadi's heart was in her throat … she hadn't used the couch in the living room since they'd gotten to the school in LA. She could barely even walk into the room without seeing, hearing, and even feeling all that had happened when Remy had almost died. "We can go to the drive in down the coast."

Amadi didn't try to hide her relief. "Can we keep the top up on the car?" she asked quietly, since that was another point of contention … the wind.

She honestly wasn't expecting it when Forge smiled warmly. "Of course we can. In fact, I've even got a new mini jet we can use instead … hover above the crowd. Enclosed atmosphere … and your favorite snacks ready to go."

"Maybe that would be better," she agreed quietly, not mentioning the fact that she didn't want to feel the wind, smell the sea, or be anywhere near people. He probably knew anyhow.

She was glad her dad was around.

Nate had just gotten done checking in on his family when he made his way back through the labs. Everything seemed to be moving along at a good clip. Progress was being made in Stark's workshops, Richards' lab, and whatever the hell Noh-Varr referred to his ship as at any given moment. He was planning to check in on that progress, too, but before he could get past the last of the medical rooms, he caught sight of Hope, frowning as she rebounded a ball and half-glared at James, who was still out.

He should have woken up by that point, and both he and Hope knew it. The two of them shared a look, not even bothering to press forward with a telepathic conversation yet. Something was off and they couldn't afford for Apocalypse or any of his cronies to get a foothold again in this reality.

Watch my back, Nate told Hope as he took up a seat in the same room as James - but not so close as to be within reach.

Like with all of Logan's family, getting into James' mind was a little rockier than most people, but Nate had fully expected that much. What he hadn't expected was once he'd gotten through how little there was to see. After the initial push through James' natural mental defenses, Nate very nearly tripped on the psychic plane by how empty it was. There should have been something … a landscape perhaps, or rolling ground. Sying had a whole city, Amadi the world, and Leslie Ann a jungle but James …

For a long moment Nate simply took in the complete lack of anything. There wasn't even an echo. He'd expected the charred remains of James' psyche after having dealth with the Phoenix destroying Apocalypse in his mind … or maybe a landscape as subtle as a wrecked building with all the doors in his mind kicked in and broken. So it took Nate some time to come up with a way to deal with this. Especially when he realized he'd never actually taken a look in James' mind before Apocalypse had done damage.

He let out a heavy breath and started to search. There had to be some kind of indicator of what should have been there. Something that would show him that they could get the boy back. Something outside of a hard to penetrate defense. This … did not bode well for anyone invested in the kid, let alone the kid himself. He knew it was going to take some time if this was all he had to work with - and he knew well enough not to try and construct something without knowing what should be there, so he simply kept looking for anything at all.

He'd been looking for long enough that he was getting tired before he decided he'd have to look into Rachel's memory of what had once been there, though he didn't want to open up that can of worms with his little sister by being open about it.

When he backed out of James' mind, Hope was watching him warily - and Nate realized it was likely because she'd been peeking in on him as he worked. I'm not through yet.

Are you sure?

Very.

Alright, but … I only ask because -

I know. But I refuse to believe that this is over.

Because if it is, this is one of the bad timelines, Hope finished. But I thought the important thing here was getting rid of Apocalypse. That's been the case everywhere else. You just don't like the idea of this group getting hit again, but Dad … if he's gone, he's gone.

Nate looked openly frustrated as he shot Hope a look. Even if I can't find anything-

Have you ever met anyone that came back from that?

This family is different, Hope.

Not when it comes to having a consciousness.

I'm not done. I'll find something.

"I'll tell Annie we're staying longer then," Hope said in a sigh, though her tone made it perfectly clear that she thought her dad was wasting his time.

Nate nodded. "Do it when Dad's asleep, if you can."

"You're going to go to Rachel, aren't you?"

Nate turned her way and Hope held up both hands. "I need to work on this right now, Hope," Nate said. "It's already gone on for too long as it is."

"Fine. Good luck. I'll be back soon to try and help … if you need it."

"Just keep watching my back," Nate answered with half a smile. "And keep an eye out for Logan. He won't back off until he finds out why I'm here otherwise."

"Shouldn't he know ahead of time to prepare himself?"

"Absolutely … but only after I know for sure that this is all that's left. Which it's not."

Hope wrinkled her nose up. "I don't know if i like the whole 'optimism' look on you. It's weird."

"Go talk to Annie," Nate said as he made his way over to get closer to Rachel first. He didn't have time to get distracted when it was clear that James was rapidly running out of time. He didn't want to be the one to point out to his father or Logan what the dangers could be if they couldn't get the kid back into his own mind. Having a conversation with the Howletts, Kurt, and his father about destroying a near-immortal body with no active presence in its mind would be unpleasant to say the least.

Pointing out that James could end up playing host to a whole slew of dangerous villains would make his point, but … even with the threat of the Shadow King or Sinister, he knew that group would have a hard time making the call. It would destroy so many of them. His father included.

It was critical that Nate find some kind of sign in James' mind that showed there was a chance. He was deeply in thought when he came upon Rachel, still holding tight to Bobby and still partly lost in her own thoughts - so she wasn't expecting it when Nate barely said hello and then unceremoniously dove into his sister's mind. He vaguely muttered out a weak apology - more to Bobby than Rachel since he knew Rachel wasn't with it enough at this point to catch it properly.

But it had to be done. Now. As much as he wanted to go easy, the more he thought about the repercussions, the more Nate had no patience for dealing with losing another kid. And he was so much his mother's son.

He was only about halfway through when Rachel started to fight back. You can't just … storm my mind, Nate, Rachel projected as she turned to fight her brother on the psychic plane.

We don't have time for this, Rachel.

Of course we do! All you have to do is ask! What is it you're looking for that you don't want me to know abo- she cut herself off mid-thought when she realized that Nate was digging into her memories from before Apocalypse. Nate … you can't just …

I just need a peek at what he was like before.

Why? All at once, both of them were out of Rachels' mindscape and staring at each other with a concerned IceMan watching over them both. "What is it you're not telling me?" Rachel asked as she strengthened her defenses.

"Rachel-"

"No, we killed Apocalypse. We got the spore out of his head. The horsemen are on the mend. So what is it you're leaving out?" Rachel's tone was frantic in spite of herself, though the Phoenix was tightly locked up all the same. What did I do to him?

Nate's mouth tightened into a thin line that was so reminiscent of Scott that Rachel had to blink to keep from reacting more strongly to how much the two of them were looking alike these days. I just need to know what his mind was like before.

No … you know that … Rachel shook her head impatiently. His mind had changed. You know it had. His heart had been broken, Nate. I know we haven't really addressed it, but you know that would make a change to him.

I know.

And you know I burned out everything Apocalypse touched in his mind, Rachel started to say with a fair bit of bluster that tapered off to nothing as her eyes widened on remembering exactly how much of James' mind had been readied for Apocalypse. He's gone isn't he? James, I mean. I killed him.

Nate was already shaking his head. No, if he's gone it's because Apocalypse killed him.

Nate … it was him in the fire. If he's gone, that's on me. Rachel's inner voice was panicked, her stress increasing in severity as she ran through it in her head. Let me help.

"That might be for the best," Nate said. "Especially if I come up empty handed."

Rachel nodded, then took a moment to fill Bobby in on what he was missing of the conversation, though the more she told him, the more somber he got - which in and of itself as a severe indicator of how bad it was. "When do you want to start?" Rachel asked Nate.

"As soon as you can."

"Let's go," she agreed, then kissed Bobby before the two Summers siblings headed off to try again.