AN: this episode will be changed drastically, instead of Lincoln going with Lily, it's Lenington.
Lenington tears his gaze of the TV (he's only using the it to listen to a science channel, mind you) and turns to us."Ah. Saturdays. The day of relaxation. As I said once, I don't mind school or waking up early. Actually, I love waking up early. Especially when it's before 4:30 AM. I get time to burn while I bench press a few tons of weight or post some videos on SeeTube, in which I only do dares that my fans send to me via voicemail until I can see again, no lines to the bathroom and most of all: The P and Q, the L and O. Peace and Quiet, Law and Order. The calm before the storm. Today is relatively tame in comparison with the norm so I'll probably ask some of my sisters to hang out with me." Lenington said as he sits with his feet up a table inside a little shack he made by himself, complete with a chair, a table and a TV that he powers with his own electrical powers. He makes his way back to the Loud House and comes for Lisa. He found her at her room, as always.
"Hey Lisa. Wanna watch some animal documentary on my TV? It's about to start." he asks. Lisa turns to him with a deadpanned look."I'll have to decline that. I'm currently busy and animal documentary is too simple for me." Lisa answers before she turns back to her desk, gaining an invisible frown from Lenington.
He finds Lynn next, "Lynn, wanna spar some of our martial arts?" "No thank you. I'm still having phantom pains from that punch barrage you gave me as a finisher." she answers."How about soccer?" Lenington suggested."You kick way too hard, I also have some phantom pains from trying to defend the goal against you."
"How about football?" "No, more phantom pains. I just want to rest and bounce some balls."
Lucy came from behind him, "Hey." she called out. Lenington turned to her without an ounce of surprise on his form."How about be my corpse? I'm practicing for a club activity with the Morticians Club." she asks. Lenington just made a dead string clone of himself. Lucy smiles and takes the clone.
Next, finds Luan."Luan, wanna watch some slapstick cartoons on my TV?" Lenington asks."Those cartoons are so boring that the mere mention of any cartoon of that type kills my mood to make a joke or try to be funny." she answered while slouching forward with a bored look. He finds Lola next.
"Hey, Lola. Wanna have another contest to see who's more well-mannered and civil?" Lenington asks her."No thanks, I keep losing to you and I don't want to add another one." Lola answered. Every time the two tried to see who is more civilized, Lenington ended up winning as he was able to keep his calm under the insults while Lola acts violently.
He turns to Lana next."Hey, Lana. Wanna wrestle some raccoons?" "I'm not wrestling anything that's not a heavyweight predator and I don't see any heavyweight predator around." Lana answered.
Later, he finds Leni who just got back from the mall."Leni! Need me to judge some more of your designs?" he asks, at this point starting to get desperate."No, not really. I'm finished with my designs for now and I just want to take a break." Leni answered and heads upstairs.
Lenington finds Lincoln next."Hey, bro! Wanna play some Muscle Fish with me?" he asks as he holds a controller."No thanks, I just got back from the comic book store and I got a lot to read. Sorry, bro." Lincoln answered with Lori passing him from behind and upstairs. After a few minutes, he sees the 10 Loud kids, Lily wasn't among them, walking to the van."Hey, Lenington. We're going to the mall, you want to come with us?" Lori asks. Lenington scoffs at this, "And use my muscles for the meager task of carrying those mockery of paper bags? Have a good day instead." Lenington answered, Lori rolls her eyes and catches up with her siblings and drove away.
Lenington turns to us again, "You'd think that with 11 siblings, someone would want to hang out with me but no. Hey don't make me ask Lori! Her definition of hanging out with a younger sibling is using them as an ottoman for her foot or whatever. Whatever, I'm just gonna try and play Dungeon Masters while blind. I'm getting desperate to kill my boredom."
Lenington booted up the game and entered the first level before getting himself some snacks and a drink, which is some ripe imported Carabao mango and an orange juice, hey don't call him a baby for drinking something that's meant for kids. It's all natural with no sugar or anything, just orange juice squeezed from an orange and straight into a tumbler. Anyway, when he came back, he saw Lily playing the game for him, and she was quite good at it. Good for a baby, intermediate-level for someone with a conscious mind. She looked like she was enjoying herself.
"Aw, is Lily enjoying herself?" Lenington asks the baby, she answers with a "Poo-poo." and a nod. Lenington watches Lily play, her decisions in selecting buffs for her character was horrible though. After a while, she ushered for Lenington to play, which he gratefully accepts. After, surprisingly, an hour of blind gameplay, he takes Lily to the attic, where most of his possession is located.
Lenington and the baby arrived at the attic."Here we are, Lily. The attic, where I'll show you most of my possessions. Walk over to the item you want me to explain to you."
Lily waddles to Lenington's assortment of unholy creature body parts stored in a trophy case. She points to a heart that was as dark as coal."A vampire heart, belonging to one of the creatures with the most potential for the destruction of mankind itself, tieing only with the demon lords themselves and being surpassed by Lucifer himself. Slain by yours truly." Lenington explained, Lily blows a raspberry at the heart."Yeah, it's a bad, bad creature. Stay away from them unless I tell you not to." Lily nods at that.
Lily turns her eye to a demon skull the size of a bucket with a long pair of horns that curve and walks over to it."Ah, a skull of a wind demon lord. A very dangerous creature, stay away from it at all costs." Lily nods to him. Lenington takes out skull and hovers an eye socket over to his ears."You can bring an eye socket of a wind demon to your ear and hear the winds of the sea. When doing so with a wind demon lord, you can hear the fierce winds of a storm instead." Lenington explains
Lily takes the skull from him and brings an eye socket to her ear, true to her big brothers words, she can hear such fierce winds. She gives it back then claps her hands and giggles. She goes over to another demon lord skull, this one looks alike with the first in all but color, the skull was a dark red coloration splashed with a bit of white.
"The skull of a fire demon lord. Another very dangerous demon. Stay away from one at all costs." Lenington harshly tells Lily, she nods at him."When you wear the skull of a fire demon, you can guarantee you can walk around in the harshest winter winds without wearing anything else but the skull. It's the skull that warms your heart. Wearing a fire demon lord's skull will let you experience a hot spring, very weird attribute I'd say, a very good stress-reliever nonetheless."
Lily moves to take the skull to wear it, Lenington places it on her head, making sure for it to not fall off. Lily makes some relaxed moans out as she begins sweating. Lenington takes it off after seeing the sweat on the young tot, gaining him a raspberry from her. Lenington would say something but heard Lily's stomach growl. Lenington chuckles and takes her to dining area, on her high-chair.
Lenington places Lily on her high-chair and finds another ripe Carabao mango for her. He takes a small bowl and slices the flesh off the mango's cheek into the bowl and gives Lily her spoon. Lenington takes his own cheek and they eat together. Lily, upon tasting the mango, gets starry-eyed at the sweetness as she chews happily and giggles after swallowing the morsel, "I know, sweet right? And it's good for you."
They finished their mangoes and Lenington prepares grabs a baby bottle for Lily and pours some orange juice in and some sugar into it, for Lily of course."Cheers!"
Lenington and Lily dranked their juice and belched loudly, "Excuse me." Lenington and Lily said/babbled and they share a laugh at the realization of then saying the same thing at the same time.
Lenington and Lily are at the arcade, playing a game of shooting some hoops, "Nice shot, Lily." Lenington compliments as he saw the baby shoots a basketball, making a rimshot. The duo won the game flawlessly and won a lot of tickets. They went to the exchange booth, Lily was allowed to pick her prize so she picks a teddy bear. Unbeknownst to them, a certain group of 10 watches them with jealousy in her eyes from her family's van as the blind boy and baby walked to the mall, presumably for some lunch.
Next, they went to the clothes store for the rich, the two occasionally belching loudly. Lily was once again allowed to choose her clothes. After wandering around, she saw a black tuxedo that looks quite alike with her big brother's tuxedo and pants, only it's her size. She walks over to it points to it."You want this, Lily?" Lenington asks, "Yah!" Lily answers.
Lenington nodded and tooked her to the changing room and puts on the tuxedo and pants on her."You look simply marvellous." Lenington comments while Lily leans on a fancy-looking cane. She looks at Lenington with a haughty look before laughing with him."Come on, Lily. Let's get those off you and pay for them."
The two went back in the changing room, Lenington changes Lily back into her lavender-coloured onesie. Afterwards, they went home with a bag of some baby tux and pants and a receipt, the camera zooms in on it and tells us that the total costs was $2100 (I suggest you read the introduction chapter if you skipped it)."So Lily, what do you want to do next." Lenington asks. Lily makes a thinking face and points to the bag of clothes. Lenington catches up with this and he changes Lily into her new clothes."What do you want to do next?"
Lily makes a crude square with her fingers."Blocks, huh? Okay, let's play some blocks."
They went upstairs to Lisa and Lily's room, finding the blocks. Lenington makes a miniature castle. Lily laughs and throws a leftover block at it, causing a part of it to fall apart but not completely. Lenington throws another block at it, hitting a vital foundation of it and thus, the castle collapses completely. The two laugh to themselves at the amount of fun they were having. Next, they played game where one builds a base and tries to destroy the base of the one another. Of course, Lily was given the game to her for her to win. She claps and giggles in happiness.
An hour later of playing different games involving blocks, Lily yawns and smacks her lips. Lenington takes Lily to her crib but refuses to sleep."What's the matter, Lily?" he asks."Blankie." Lily answers."Ohh, ok I'll get it for you."
Lenington leaves, Lily peeks to the doorway from her crib and waits expectantly. A few seconds later, her big brother comes back with her lavender blanket."Blankie!" Lily holds up her arms for them and Lenington gives her blanket to her."Want me to tell you a bedtime story?" he asks.
Lily nods wildly, dazing herself before regaining her senses. Lenington thinks for a while before he looks back to Lily."I got a story. Once upon a time..."
Lenington recites an adventure story to her, we skip to the ending."After a long day of fighting trolls and dragons, the legendary warrior returns to his home in the woods. He cleans the house, he prepared his dinner, cleaned himself and went to bed. The end."
After the story, Lily had droopy eyes and yawns, tired after a long day with her big brother."Good night, Lily." Lenington gives her a kiss on her forehead, Lily smiles weakly and fell fast asleep, snoring loudly all the while. He turns to the doorway and saw all of his siblings looking with confused looks.
"What was that all about?" Luna asks."Oh, I hanged out with Lily since none of you wanted to do stuff with me and I tried to do stuff with you guys that you like. Of course, I didn't ask Lori since her definition of hanging out with her sibling is the equivalent of turning us into slaves and she wouldn't want a broken foot or shattered bottles of perfume if I was her ottoman, that's what it was about." Lenington answered."Oh please. I don't use my siblings as an ottoman when we hang out." Lori denied, huffing and crossing her arms."Ha! That's like saying I'm wimpy and Lincoln is strong." Lenington replied. The others nodded in agreement.
"You could have come to the mall with us." said Lynn."Yeah, and make me carry those hand bags?" Lenington said and points to the bags they all were holding."Yeah, no thanks. They're too light for me that it's essentially an insult to my bare hands and raw national girth."
He flexes his muscles, which are noticeably bulging through his clothes from the size of them. The sisters began having thoughts on their muscular brother, he isn't related to them in blood so it can't be considered as incest."Anyway, I'd like to rest since today has been quite the day with Lily." Lenington brushed past his siblings and fell asleep on the couch, where Lily's bag of clothes was. They only noticed the bag now and takes a look inside.
They saw baby-sized tuxedo and pants, perfect fit for Lily. Lincoln takes a look at the receipt and does a spit-take upon seeing such numbers."$2100?! How could Lenington afford all this?" he asks loudly and incredulously. The sisters gasp at the price of clothes, by simple arithmetic and economic knowledge, they deduce that each pair of clothes costed $300, 200 for the tuxedo and 100 for the pants. There were 7 pairs in all."Lenington!" Lori screamed as she shakes the sleeping boy awake. It works and he awakes, dazed and confused.
"Wha? Oh, what do you want, Lori?" he asks."How could afford buying a bag of clothes worth $2100?!" Luna asks loudly."You seem to forget that I upload videos for fun and money. I'm a certified SeeTube with a million followers, of course I'd be payed. I get millions of views under 10 hours. Heck, companies pay me to put up their ads on some of my videos. And of course, I'd have to get a bank account early for SeeTube to pay me. How did I get a bank account at the age of 11, you ask? Well, a representative of SeeTube helped me get one, simple as that. Currently, I earn about 50 to 60 grand per month" Lenington ranted whilst answering all the potential questions that the Loud kids had."Now please, let me sleep. Wake me up when it's time for dinner." Lenington promptly fell asleep again. His siblings fulfilled their promise of waking him up for dinner.
The next morning, Lenington was heading for Lily in her room but was met by his 10 other siblings with angry faces that cannot see (because he's blind)."Hey guys. What is it?" He asks."Lenington, I think you should stay away from Lily for a while." says Lori."And why is that?" Lenington asks, putting a hand to his hip."You've been a bad influence to her!" Lola wailed loudly, anger evident in her voice.
"Care to give me some reason as to why you think that?" Lenington asks."She keeps throwing away my makeup when I try to put some on her." Lori obliges to her brother's wishes."She keeps throwing my balls at the cactus." "She burps super loud when we feed her." Leni says."She also does that when she drinks the water I pour on her teacup and when she eats the cookies I make." Lola joined in."She ripped off Bun-Bun's ears." Lincoln angrily stated as he held his plush toy and it's dismembered ear.
Lenington's whole body cringes intensely, he slouches forward and brings his hands forward with his fingers pointing to the ceiling."Seriously, Lincoln? You're saying that to someone who controls strings. Give me those!" Lenington swiped Bun-Bun and it's ear. He points his free hand's index finger at the part where the ear was torn off and a string comes out of the finger into the plush bunny. Several strings came came out of the damaged ear and reattached the severed part back, looking good as new so Lenington handed it to his brother."There. Now, back with Lily. I'll stay away from her if that's what you want. I'll just tell her that I won't be hanging out with her for now." with that, Lenington came to Lily, who is still in her suit from yesterday. The baby claps happily at the sight of the big brother that made her a happy baby."Lily, I got something to tell you." Lenington started, Lily looks at him and waits for whatever he has to say
"Lily, we can't hang out for now. Maybe someday we can have fun again, just not this time." Lenington finished. Upon registering what he said, Lily gained a sad look, teary eyes and pouty lips but nods anyway. Lenington left and met up with his siblings again, he ushered them to Lily and left without a word. The 10 kids cheered at this, "Time for us to hang out with Lily!"
After a brief argument on who gets to hang out with the baby first, it was decided that Lynn was first to hang out with Lily. After applying some kind of substance, which were provided by Lisa, to her balls to protect it against popping, she took Lily outside and tried to play catch with a rubber ball."Come on, Lily. Catch!"
Lynn throws the ball, which gently bops Lily on the head but ignored it and sighed sadly. Lynn tried a few more ball games but ultimately, she only got more sad sighs. Lynn Loud Jr. was not the type to give up easily. But in this case, she knew that trying to play with a sad Lily meant that the baby was adamant in her refusal to play ball with her sporty sister. So in this case, Lynn gave up trying to play with the baby and handed her to Lucy.
Lucy tried to make her wear all black clothes and makeup but as her hands travelled to Lily, the baby bites the pale hand and tries to protect the suit from her. Her efforts was cute but successful as several times Lucy has tried to remove the suit from Lily, the baby pushes her away. When the goth girl tried to put on some black makeup on the baby, the latter swats the equipment away from her. Lucy sighs and hands her Lisa.
Lisa tries to do a dangerous looking experiment on her, all the while laughing like a mad scientist. She takes a final look at Lily before she turns to the button labelled with 'activate' and presses it. When she turned back to the Lily, she found nothing. She worried that the baby was vaporised but saw her at the corner of her eyes, crawling away. Lisa gave up trying to do more experiments with her.
It was Lincoln who found Lily next so he took her and tried to introduce her to Ace Savvy. The baby merely ignored him. Lincoln tried to get her interested in his coin collection but Lily swats it away from her, crossing her hands on her chest and makes a pouty face. He tries to give her a liquid form of his peanut butter and sauerkraut sandwich but slaps it away, still pouting.
Lola was next but Lily just crawls away. Lana was next after that and tried to get her to play with Izzy, her pet lizard and Hops, her pet frog but Lily was not interested and also crawls away.
Luan finds her next and tells her some jokes. Lily yawns at her jokes and faces the comedienne with a bored look. Luna takes her turn next and plays some rock music next. Of course, her speakers weren't maxed out to avoid harming Lily's sensitive ears. Lily wasn't interested once again. Before Luna can try a different song, Lily was already gone. Leni was next and tries to get Lily to model for her some baby clothes.
For her to do that though, she needs to remove Lily's suit. She tries that but got bitten like Lucy. Leni tries to get Lily interested in fashion but failed. Lori was next and tries to get Lily interested in Dream Boat, specifically with Dylan but failed. Lily was currently in her room, while the siblings minus Lenington had a sibling meeting. At the moment, she tried to play the base war game that she and Lenington played yesterday but couldn't find any enjoyment.
She tried making a castle but it falls apart at different points. She sighs sadly as she couldn't find anything fun without her best big brother. Looking around the room, she finds the door wasn't closed. She takes this opportunity to find her big brother. She crawls down the stairs and waddles around, looking for the boy clad in black. Her efforts bore fruit as she found him eating a meatball sub. She crawls up to him and touched his legs.
This got the attention of the boy and he looks down."Oh hey, Lily. What is it?" he asks."Pla'! Pla'!" Lily babbled."Sorry Lily. But it's still too soon for that. It's only been five minutes. See ya later." Lenington turned to leave and saw his siblings.
It already hurts for Lily to be denied to play with her favourite sibling but a second hurts more. So she cried for and threw a tantrum for Lenington, "Dada! Dada! DADA!"
!!!
"GUH!" was Lenington's reaction from being referred to as a parental figure, along with being briefly choked with his sub. The siblings gasped when they heard what Lily called Lenington. Lenington picked up Lily and joined the Loud kids in staring at us.
The End