Zelena had slowly gotten over her shock at Alice telling her no. She'd struggled for so long saying she wanted to do things and she'd finally managed to say she didn't want to do something. But it was starting to feel like she'd only do it if she was beyond terrafied. But it was still an accomplisment. It was some kind of progress when it had felt like Alice was only going to get worse before she got better.
Zelena set the food on the table and went to get Alice, still giving her aan option about where she ate. Really, Zelena would prefer if she ate in the kitchen but since there were only so many things she could use to give Alice a way to excercise the decison making skils she'd been deprived she'd let her eat wherever she damn well pleased.
Alice now knew Zelena wouldn't be angry if she told her no. She was still frightened. But Zelena had sworn she would never make her go back to the tower and Alice had started to believe what Zelena said. She didn't want to eat in her room or at the table.
"No." Zelena would have dropped anything she'd been holding had her hands not been empty. Alice was saying no and it didn't seem like a response to fear.
"Ok, that's fine. You're allowed to tell me no. Where do you want to eat?"
Alice wanted to eat outside but didn't know if it was okay. What if Zelena did get angry? She decided it couldn't be as bad as it would have if she asked mother. "Outside?"
Alice's voice was quiet but Zelena understood her. Alice had decided what she wanted wasn't the same as what she was offered and she'd asked for it! Of bloody course she could eat outside. "Sure, you can eat outside." Zelena didn't want to push too much further on the communication front, feaarful of losing Alice's willigness to do it so she offered her choices again "Do you want to go get your food or do you want me to?
"I." Alice's whisper was a little more confident than usual. She still stared at Zelena, worried more about getting up without asking.
Zelena wondered if the slight uptick in her confidence would affect her movement. Zelena walked away and waited for a moment. (Come on,) she silently begged. (You can do this).
Alice waited for permission and got nothing. She didn't like it. She hadn't asked but Zelena had walked away. It'd be fine. It'd be fine. She got up and held onto her stuffed rabbit extra tightly. She walked out of her room and immediatly sat down. No. This was wrong. But Zelena wasn't in the same room any more she wouldn't see her. Would she? It was fine.
Zelena was in the kitchen where she could see Alice but Alice couldn't see her. She watched as Alice finally walked across the living room. It felt like watching a young child take their first steps. Zelena wanted to track down the girl's "mother" and skin her alive at this point. This teenager looked more terrafied walking across the living room than anyone had ever been of anything. Zelena watched as Alice stopped and either stood still or sat down after every few steps. Every step was shakier than the one before.
Alice stood back up and shakily took steps, pausing after every few wondering if she would anger Zelena doing this. It took her a little while but she made it into the kitchen where everyone was sitting at the table. She crumpled up on the floor and started spewing out indescernible apologies.
"Alice, it's okay. That's really good. I want you to walk on your own," Zelena wasn't sure if trying to push her had been the right plan. She was already so scared, was she just adding more to the list of reasons Alice retreated into various corners of the house and refused to so much as look at anyone? "That was more than good. Great job."
Good? It was good? Alice almost understood. But it was so different. She'd always been told it was wrong. But why was it wrong for her but not for Robin? Or Zelena? Or Henry? Or even Robin? Was it okay?
"It'sokay," Alice whispered, repeating what Zelena had said.
"Yes."
Alice nodded. She had a few more steps she had to take to get her food but she made it. She picked up her food and glanced at Zelena.
"Canigooutsidenow?"
"Yeah, go ahead." Zelena wasn't going to make her go through the amount of effort it had clearly taken for her to get across the room without asking again right away.
Alice walked outside after grabbing Luna and sat down. Her squirell friend came to visit her.
"Shewas...wrong?" She asked the squirell. Had mother been wrong? Was it okay for her to do things without permission?
She finished her food and decided she'd try again. She still grabbed Luna's leash but this time didn't ask her.
They walked inside. She walked into the kitchen and put the plates in the sink. She didn't need anyone to tell her she could do it.
"I was_ " Henry cut himself off and just let her have the plate he was still using. His sandwhich had been in his hand and for once she was acting more confident than he'd ever seen her. Granted, she still flinched when he spoke and nearly dropped the plate when he had slightly adjusted so he could eat over the table better.
She finished cleaning the kitchen and sat down in the corner of it. How would Zelena know she hadn't asked? She'd have to tell her. Please don't be mad. Please don't be mad.
Zelena opened the door to look for Alice. Since when did she not ask to come inside?
Zelena found her in the kitchen.
"Hey."
Alice nodded.
"SorryIdidn'taskLuna."
"That's fine. You don't have to ask to come inside you live here. That's really good!" Zelena was so happy but kept her excitment quiet so she wouldn't startle Alice.
Alice wanted to use the bathroom and hadn't had a chance to ask that morning. Would Zelena be angry if she went without asking? She seemed happy she was doing things on her own. And she'd never heard her so much as yell at Robin for doing the same thing.
Alice stood up and walked away. Not saying anything to Zelena. Each step was still shaking and heart felt like it was beating so much faster but she was doing it. It would be fine. Wouldn't it? Alice hoped so. She made it to the bathroom, slowly. She had to stop every few steps to think if she really wanted to risk this.
Zelena blinked as Alice walked away. It took her a moment to fully process what that meant. Alice had walked away on her own more than once! She was getting it. Something Zelena had been trying to explain for months had finally clicked. Zelena didn't have to know what caused it. She was getting better. And she knew how to tell her no now too. It wasn't exactly teenage rebellion but it was close enough.
