BOOM. Another update within the week. This one's a long one, so buckle up and enjoy!
I know a lot of you are unhappy with Sasuke; remember that in his chapter he was intimidated by his feelings for Sakura. He had his reasons for breaking up with Sakura, even if they might seem stupid...he still has time to learn from it and fix it!
Or does he?
Love you all!
Knock knock knock
Sighing, I slid farther into the couch.
"Sakura! Open up!" Ino's muffled voice called through the door. Did she think I didn't know it was her? After the altercation at the grocery store and disappearing from work for almost a week, I knew she'd come looking for me eventually. Especially since I wasn't responding to any of her texts or calls.
She knocked again. I ignored it. I wasn't mad at Ino; she was just trying to be a good friend. But I wasn't in the right mindset, or have the energy to talk to anyone. "Sakura! I know you're in there! I'm not leaving till you answer the door." She yelled. I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping that she was bluffing.
Bang bang bang!
Dammit. I didn't want to do this right now, but my neighbors would get upset about the noise. 'Just let me crawl into a hole and die in peace.' Grunting, I heaved off the couch. My legs were stiff from sitting for so long. I shook a leg with each step, trying to ease the muscles, as I walked to the door. I undid the lock and slid the door open.
Shock spread across Ino's face, her eyebrows shooting off her forehead. Yeah, I knew I looked like shit. Agitated, I left the door open and lurked back to the couch. Ino gaped for a second, caught off guard, then she scurried in. She locked the door and set her purse on the counter with a scowl.
"You answered the door and left it open," she pointed to my bum, "without pants on?" She asked, shaking her head. "Damn. I've never seen you like this."
"I've never felt like this." I retorted. Facing her and knees plopping on the couch, I placed my elbows against the back and propped my head up. " I appreciate you wanting to help, but I just want to be left alone." I told her coldly. I stared her down with uncaring eyes; the need to push anyone and everyone away burned strongly in my soul.
"I just wanted to check on you; you never miss work, and you've been gone all week. All for what? Moping around in your underwear."
"Doesn't matter. I called it in."
"Doesn't matter?! Since when?"
"If you're just gonna lecture me, then leave. I don't want to hear it."
She stared back. "Fine then." Grabbing her purse, she turned her back to me and started walking to the door. Hurt pulsed through me, the burn to push her away dying. That's what I wanted though, wasn't it? To wallow in my misery. The leftover pieces of my heart were angry, but they cried out for help. I didn't know if I could put it back together by myself, and waiting for Sasuke to magically come back was unreasonable and stupid. It was stupid of me to expect her to see through the harshness. My mouth opened to apologize, but I closed it. A sick part of me felt like I deserved to be alone, and it was winning.
Ino turned around and whipped her purse at me. I yelped, ducking to avoid her heavy purse. My knees rocked and I lost my balance, almost falling off the couch. A smash sounded behind me; the purse hitting the wall. After checking to make sure she hadn't reloaded with something else, I popped back up and glared at her.
"What the fuck?!" I seethed.
"You think I'm gonna leave you while you're throwing this pathetic pity party? No fucking way."
I sunk down in shame; she was right. Tears gathered in my eyes. Ino went into mother bear mode. Crossing the floor in hurried strides she hugged me, not caring that I was in two day old panties and an over-sized t-shirt.
"I'm sorry." I groveled. Ino snorted, her way of showing me that it wasn't a big deal, and patted me on the back comfortingly. She pulled away. "Girl, don't worry about it. Just talk to me." I wiped at my eyes before the tears fell and pushed them back. I didn't want to cry in front of Ino, but I was having a difficult time calming down. Once the emotions started flowing it was hard to cut off. Emotional regulation wasn't my strong point. That's why I'd been hiding out in my apartment for a week. I wiped at my face again.
"I thought if things went back to normal, then everything would be fine. I was just kidding myself." I admitted. All I'd done by pushing the hurt down was tighten the coil, packing it tighter and tighter. It was only a matter of time before it sprang back.
"I'm sorry, I had no idea. I thought you were handling it okay." She said. I folded my legs on the cushion, looking down at my hands. Ino shouldn't feel guilty when I hid my true feelings. "I was." I paused. "I thought I was."
"It takes time." She reasoned, which made sense.
I sighed. "I know, but you'd think I'd feel somewhat better by now." But the ache hadn't faded. Not even a little bit.
After Sasuke's breakup text, text for god's sake, the glass didn't just crack. It shattered into a million pieces. Things had been strange, I'd picked up the vibes and the distance from Sasuke all the way in Suna, but the breakup blindsided me. I'd been, quite literally, blinded by love.
Sasuke had been floating around my brain for years after just one night. Then, he came back into my life and threw everything into chaos. Yet I was happy with it, and hopelessly in love. How long would that take to go away? I couldn't stop the tears from dropping. "Ino...what if he was the one? And now I've lost him."
Ino fumbled to find the right words to soothe me. "He moved and long distance doesn't work out 99 percent of the time. It wasn't your fault. I know this breakup hurts, but it will get better."
"I've been dumped before; This feels different." Sasuke wasn't my first heartbreak, but he'd brought out new, deep feelings I didn't know were possible. I sunk further into despair. 'This is not making me feel better.'
Ino leaned her head against her hand, her blue eyes sympathetic. "Listen, if it's meant to work out, then it will. Time hurts, but that's all you can give right now."
Did she know that I'd been waiting for a month for him to change his mind? Maybe that was the issue. I wasn't letting myself go forward. I didn't know how to do that though; it wasn't like I could reboot and wipe the slate clean. But talking to her did make me feel a little better.
"Thanks for being such a great friend Ino."
Smiling, she shrugged. "What are best friends for?" I gave her a weak smile. A box of tissues sat on the end table; She reached over and grabbed a tissue. Still feeling vulnerable, I let her use the tissue to blot at my wet face. Now that I'd calmed down, I felt burnt out from the fluctuating emotions.
Ino made one last touch up under my eye before walking to the trash to throw the tissue away. She turned and leaned her hip against the wall with a small smile. "In fact, it's my honorary duty to help. And I know what you need right now."
"Ino…" I whined, exasperated. She tsk'ed me, wagging her finger.
"I said what you 'need', not what you 'want'." There was a mischievous glint in those blue eyes. 'Uh oh.' I thought, but a nostalgic grin crept up my face. Typical Ino. She practically skipped over to stand in front of me. Grabbing me by the shoulders, she announced with determination, "We're going out tonight!"
That was her plan? After being a slob for an extended period of time, I wasn't up for going out. I pouted. "Can't; my butt has fused with the couch."
"Come onnn!" She pleaded, lightly shaking my shoulders. I let out a dramatic sigh.
"Okay." I relented with a huff.
She lit up. "Yay! I thought I'd have to drag you out the door."
"You might still have to, I'm quickly changing my mind."
Reaching for my arms, she latched on and tugged me. "Come on! Before the couch wins."
I groaned for the fiftieth time that night.
"Ino, why are we here?" I whined, trying to fight off the shiver going up my leg. The nights were chilly, even though it was still pretty warm for autumn. It definitely wasn't sleeveless, short dress season though. The outfit under my jacket was no match for the weather.
"Because neither of us know how to line dance. This was the only other option. Come on." She responded. After we got out of Ino's car she pulled us towards the large neon sign that said The O.G., a cliche 90's themed dance club that'd just opened up last week. Apparently Ino had been talking about it for the past month, but I'd been...preoccupied, to say the least.
A groan/sigh erupted from the back of my throat again. Fifty-one. And still counting.
I didn't want to be here, but I needed to do something. Ino was right and I needed to get out of the house and out of my own head. My overthinking was the reason I was drowning in depression. 'Among with why I'm overthinking…' No. I wasn't going there tonight. I promised Ino.
But why did I have to wear this?
It was Ino's dress so it was lilac, which actually complimented my hair well. The dress flowed out at the hips and rested mid-thigh. The top was a sweetheart neckline with mesh straps, providing a bit more coverage. Ino was chestier than me, but I managed to get a decent amount of cleavage with my only good push-up bra. The back was a lace-up design that cinched my waist snugly. It did look good on me, and all the other women here had similar outfits that were bolder. The only thing that I wasn't sure about was how tight it was. Ever since the break up all I'd done at work and home was snack on bad foods like chips, chocolate, and whatever I could get my hands on. Perhaps I was unconsciously trying to make myself look like how I felt. Ugly and unwanted.
After a couple weeks I chalked up the courage to weigh myself and cried at the scale. For someone who acted like they didn't care I'd felt so insecure. I fell into the next step of my depression; not wanting to eat. And when I did, it was strictly salads. And leftover chocolate. I weighed myself just yesterday, and I weighed five pounds less than I originally did so I guess it evened out.
Ugh. No wonder why I felt so shitty all the time, my body was deprived of regular vitamins and minerals. When Monday came around, it was back to the gym for my sorry butt.
Ino skipped to the sidewalk with me in tow, a small frown tugging at my lips. I took one look at the line of people filling the block and turned back around. She tugged me back, bee-lining for the entrance.
"What are you doing? That line goes all the way down the block. It'll take forever just to get in and I don't want to stand out in the cold." I argued, but she kept going.
Instead of stopping at the end of the line, Ino continued to go towards the front. I grimaced at the glares.
"They're not going to let us cut-"
Ino let go of my hand and skipped up to the bouncer, putting full flirt on. I rolled my eyes, as did the bouncer. This guy was a veteran; used to pretty girls hitting on him to skip the line and get in. He folded his arms, ready to turn her away but Ino leaned in and put a hand up to his ear. She whispered something to him. The big man's face softened, and he nodded. He turned and whispered something back. Her smile widened, and she waved me forward. I felt daggers on me as I walked past the line and next to Ino. The bouncer opened the door and let us in.
"I'm impressed. What'd you say to him?" I asked her. She laced her fingers behind her back and looked at the high ceiling.
"I told him you got dumped." She responded cheekily. I pursed my lips and gave her an annoyed glance.
"Thanks for your sensitivity, Ino." I said sarcastically. She flashed a cheesy smile.
"It worked, didn't it?"
We handed our coats over, they had some fancy coat check, and kept my phone and ID in a small black cross-body purse. Ino did the same with her stuff. She looked gorgeous in a highwaisted, A-line skirt that was black with matching heels. She fit in with her metallic blue cami and slick high ponytail. I left my hair down, letting it sway against my shoulders.
My eardrums pulsed with loud music as we stepped past the coat room. There was a wraparound bar, covering three of the building's walls. The dance floor took up most of the room, with a tall DJ platform on the back wall. Girls danced in metallic mini skirts and halter crop tops with guys who had their caps backwards and wore bright, patterned shirts. It looked like old-school MTV spring break. The only sign that it was close to Halloween was the women had on different animal headbands. The dance floor lit up, and there were even dance cages on platforms that were currently empty. Must be too early in the night. Two men passed us in suede suits, giving me Night at the Roxbury vibes.
We went up to the bar and ordered drinks. An appletini for her and a cosmopolitan for me. Finding a standing table facing out to the dance floor, we drank and watched the dancers grind on each other. I felt my reluctance wash away with the first sip. A guy wearing an open button up shirt and tank underneath came up to us with animal headbands. Another guy in a graphic tee shirt was next to him, holding an appletini and cosmopolitan.
We accepted the drinks and the headbands. Guy #1 handed Ino the cheetah headband, then turned to me and put the studded bunny ears on me. A little forward, but it was fine for now. Guy #1 zeroed in on me, staring down at me with hazel eyes, as guy #2 shamelessly flirted with Ino. I took the coy route, playfully refusing to tell him my name. Playing along, he nicknamed me Bunny. He was very loud and reminded me of Naruto, but he was cute with dark hair and hazel eyes. He had a little bit of charm to him, and I didn't mind talking to him. He asked to dance and I shrugged, saying sure.
Our group ventured out on the dance floor. I did my best to be flirty without getting too close; I didn't dance a lot. I could swing to the beat, but that was about it. Ino and I faced each other as we danced, our two partners dancing next to us. Ino laced her fingers through mine and raised our arms above our heads. Guy #1, who's name was Jace, stepped closer. I felt hands on my hips. Ino saw me freeze and wiggled our conjoined hands; an unspoken message. 'Don't freak out.' I went back to swaying. It was just dancing after all.
Then I felt him press up against my backside, his pelvis rubbing against my butt.
"I need another drink!" I squeaked with a red face. If I was going to do this I needed more alcohol, because I could feel everything. Jace definitely wasn't getting anything from me tonight. Dancing didn't have to mean more, but a twinge of me felt bad that I was leading him on.
"We got it!" Ino said, looping her arms around Guy# 2's (I didn't know his name yet) neck and tugging him off the dance floor. I turned to face Jace, but dancing chest to chest somehow felt more intimate so I turned back around. Against my better judgement, I pushed back against him. The hands on my hips encircled my waist. A mix of excitement and uncertainty rushed through me. Ino came back with shots just in time.
I took my shot. Then, flashing my best sexy smile, I stole Jace's out of his hand and downed it. It was disgusting, but I squeezed my eyes shut and let it flow down my throat. "Hey!" Jace laughed. He reached down and hooked my chin up, giving me an open mouthed kiss. My lady parts hummed, but my pulse didn't pick up. Suddenly I was angry at you-know-who, and I blamed him for the confusion in my body. I leaned back for better access. Why did this feel like sweet revenge? I felt his hand slide up my thigh, bringing up my skirt and squeezing. The goody two shoes in me panicked, and I forced my sensibility to shut up. Moping on the couch wasn't helping me, maybe loosening up would. Jace was attractive and all over me. But I wanted to pull that hand off my thigh before he reached my ass and exposed my thong to the whole dance floor. I subtly started to pull away, but he dove farther in.
"Slow down big boy, go easy on her." Ino said, reaching over and pushing Jace's shoulder. He pulled away and I could finally breathe again. I swayed my hips, and he was forced to pull his hand away and place it back on my waist. A blush dusted his cheeks and he looked starstruck and a little embarrassed. "Sorry, I got carried away." He apologized. His hold on me loosened, offering some space. I gave Ino a thank you smile.
"I have to go to the bathroom." I told Jace over the music. His face lit up and he leaned in again. "You want company?"
I gulped. He obviously misunderstood.
"N-no!" I blinked. "Actually, Ino. Come with me?"
Ino nodded, dragging her hand down her dance partner's arm. "We'll be right back." She said with a wink. We squeezed past people, making our way into the bathroom. Once we were in, we waited in a small line.
"Are you okay?" Ino asked me. I nodded.
"Yeah, he just...caught me off guard."
"Well it's obvious he wants more than just a kiss from you. Is that what you want?"
"I don't know." Ino's eyebrows shot up, surprised it wasn't a no. By now the old Sakura would've done more than say no; she would've ran away. I elaborated. "I mean...I don't want to go home with him...but he's attractive. And he's a good kisser. But won't I be leading him on?"
Ino shook her head. "Nah; Sakura, you don't have to do anything you don't want to. If you just want to makeout, then makeout, give his dick a squeeze, and leave. He might be disappointed tonight, but chances are he won't care tomorrow."
I choked on laughter. "Dick squeeze?"
She flashed a smirk, making a fondling motion with her hand. "Oh yeah; that's the best part! You should see some of the reactions I get." We heard some snickers around us from the other women in line. Seems like they agreed. "Seriously, there's no reason to feel bad about wanting to feel wanted."
"Okay…except for the dick squeeze." I said hesitantly. "If he hasn't forgotten me already."
Ino smirked "Trust me, he hasn't. He's clinging to you like a little puppy dog. If you like him, give him your number. You guys would make a cute couple and he's already falling all over you."
'I don't want that.' Was my immediate thought. Wasn't that what I should want though? I was frustrated again. 'Not time to think about that right now. Love is not on the agenda.'
"Can we get more drinks before we go back out?" I asked her. I needed some liquid courage. The line had finally dwindled down, and Ino held the door closed with her back to me as I peed. "Sure, we'll stop at the bar and get more shots."
"Why shots?" I asked. I didn't like the taste of straight liquor. It made me gag. I flushed the toilet and switched spots with her.
"We can't hold our drinks while dancing, so we'd have to leave 'em at a table. Unattended. The guys we're with seem nice, but there's a chance someone else could drug our drinks."
I frowned. "Oh."
After we were refreshed, I took another two shots at the bar. Then, carried one back to Jace. The guys had moved off the dance floor to wait for us, and I handed it to him with a smile. "Thanks." He grabbed the shot with one hand. The other hand came up and brushed my cheek. His thumb glided across my bottom lip. "It's sweeter when it comes from your lips though." He whispered huskily. Those shots were starting to kick in. Daringly, I lightly bit his thumb. Jace's cheeks went red and a dopey smile flashed. Wow, I made him nervous. We took a break from dancing and all the touching, though Jace put his hand over mine. Was he starting to look a little blurry? Oh well, still hot.
I spied guy #2 leaning into Ino and whispering in her ear. She smirked, but shook her head. Ino was a hunter; she was already eyeing somebody else. Guy#2 reverted to his phone. After a few minutes, guy #2 pulled Jace aside.
"Yo! Jace, c'mere." He said, gesturing him away from the table. Jace sighed.
"I'll be right back."
Jace and guy#2 huddled together. Ino was over her dance partner already, so she ignored them and eyed a tall man in a surfer tee on the dance floor. After a while I took a peek at Jace and his friend; it looked like they were going back and forth about something. Jace came back as his friend went to the bar. "Hey, we have to head out." He said. Hope shined in his eyes. 'Uh oh.' Reaching out, he took my hand in his. "Come with me?" He jerked his head towards Ino. "Your friend can come too, if it makes you more comfortable." He promised, but I could read between the lines. It'd be just him and I at the end of the night.
'I can't do this.' All that liquid courage flushed down the toilet. "I'm sorry, I don't think she wants to go anywhere, and I should stay with her."
"Come onnn." He prodded, tugging at our entwined hands. I let go.
"I can't." I said.
"Can I have your number? Maybe we can go out together some time."
"I'm sorry; no."
Hurt flashed across his eyes. Damn, that's what I was trying to avoid. He pulled away.
"I just got dumped." I blurted. He had to know that I wasn't using him, even though I kinda was. "I-I'm just...in a weird place right now." I struggled to find the right words. Jace walked off. I should've seen that coming. 'Damn. Felt shitty, but it was the right thing to do.' That hurt in his eyes was real. I turned my head away, suddenly in a bad mood. Another guy had already approached Ino and I didn't want to ruin it for her.
Something warm tugged on my hand again. My head swiveled to see Jace holding a pen. He wrote his number on my arm. "There," He smiled, "When you're ready, you can call me." Dropping the pen, he leaned in. " And this," His hand slithered to my neck, "is insurance." He kissed me again. Tilting my head to the side, I deepened the kiss. My hands laced through his black hair. I almost changed my mind. Almost. But I knew I wouldn't, just like I knew I wouldn't call him.
When he pulled away, for a second I thought it was Sasuke in front of me. The eyes were the wrong color, his jaw the wrong shape. Not the same when we kissed. I blinked hard. Was I drunk enough to start hallucinating? 'It's not Sasuke. That's a good thing.' While he'd come off strong at first, Jace was attractive, nice, and funny. Definitely my type.
Except he wasn't Sasuke.
Months ago, there was a strong chance I would've really liked Jace, but Sasuke still had a hold on me. Nothing compared to how I felt with Sasuke. My heart lurched with hurt again. 'No no no.'
"Ino!" I said as Jace and his friend left. "Time for more shots!"
"Yeah!" She cheered.
I'd had so many drinks that I didn't know how long I'd been dancing, but all the sweat and adrenaline felt freeing. A couple guys had cycled out dancing with me, but no more kissing for me. Ino had gone off somewhere with her new dance partner. I didn't remember where she said she was going. How long had she been gone? Eh. She'd come back eventually. Actually, she was going at it pretty hard with, what was his name? Ah, Reed. Yeah, she was sucking his face off pretty good when I saw them at the corner of the bar. 'Maybe she's sucking something else now..'
I giggled to myself. 'Naughty.' At least it looked like them. Ino cut me off after the last drink I had, but I was still buzzing with booze in my veins.
Someone slid their hands down my sides from behind. My eyesight was a little fuzzy as I took a peek over my shoulder. I didn't get a good look, but he looked hot enough. I kept dancing. He pulled me against him, practically burying his face in my hair. 'Woooah. Too much.' I playfully slapped at his arm, telling him to back off. Sober Sakura would be furious, but I mellowed out with the drunken haze. As long as he understood 'no touchy touchy on the boobs, butt, or hooha' we were good. I felt my new dance partner's hand brush my side again. His touch didn't light my insides on fire. Not like Sas- Ahem. Like you-know-who. I frowned, disappointed. 'Need ta stop usin' his name.'
"Hey Sakura, wanna come back to my place?" A deep voice said from behind me. I dance-twirled, failing to notice in my inebriation that whoever was with me somehow knew my name. I sure as hell hadn't told him. But once I looked at the man's slicked back hair and sinister smile, my eyes widened in fear. My mind sobered enough to recognize the danger I was in.
Hidan stood in front of me. He was the one that had come up behind me, picked me up, and sniffed my hair.
I turned to run, but before I could he harshly grabbed me with one arm, pinning my arms to my sides, and covered my mouth with a cloth. Chloroform. 'Oh my god.' I panicked. I stopped breathing and fought to get away before the effects kicked in, but chloroform worked quickly even while holding my breath. My kicks slowed as I grew tired. The people around us were unaware of what was going on, drunk and not paying attention to what was happening.
Tears gathered in my eyes as I was hoisted into the air and against his chest again. The last thing I saw was his victorious grin before my legs stopped altogether and everything went black.
Uh ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh
What'd you think? admittedly I don't go out much, but I had a friend who had a similar experience with random dudes just coming up behind her to dance. And before you ask, no. There was no dick squeezing lol
R&R PLZ! No flames.