I would like to thank LoveComesFromUs who left a review after the last chapter pointing out that my story is very much written in an pro-Arizona view. Guilty as charged! Sorry.
In the therapy sessions at the start of the story, they individually worked on their issues, but since they've been back together, I was heading down the Callie needs to trust Arizona route. It's not that I'm anti Callie in that she has to make all the effort, it's just that from a story point of view, jealousy is an obvious and easy/lazy way to go.
Yes trust in a relationship is important, and this chapter does focus on trust, but I've used a call with Meredith as a way of changing direction slightly.
So thank you for the review and for all your reviews as they really do make me think about the direction of the story.
Monday
Callie was in bed reading when her phone started buzzing.
"Hey you. What's up?"Callie asked as she looked at her friend on face time.
"I have a problem...I'm having sex" Mer responded straight faced.
"OOOKAY...and that's a problem how?" Callie asked
"I'm having sex in my dreams"
"Ahh!"
"Wait...it gets worse...l'm having sex...in my dreams...with De Luca!"
"Carina!" Callie responded in shock
"Nooooo Callie I still like dick...the brother...Andrew...the resident"
Callie breathed a sigh of relief that Mer hadn't fallen for Dr Orgasm's charms like Arizona had. She had never met Carina, and she was probably perfectly nice, but she didn't want her friend hooking up with her as well!
"I'm basically having sex dreams over a resident and I can't make them stop Callie...and when I see him at work...well I just want to rip his clothes off and..."
"I get the picture!" Callie interrupted keen not to hear the full details of Meredith's fantasies.
"So what's so wrong with wanting sex Mer? It's healthy. Sex is good for you". A mental picture of Arizona sitting on top of her, grinding down hard flashed into Callie's mind at that point. She shook her head to shake the image away and focus on what her friend was saying.
"I know Cal...I like sex...it's just I've become the lusty attending perving after the resident...I'm like Derek... no wait... I've turned into Mark Sloan...I'm the female Mark Sloan!" Mer started laughing and Callie soon joined in
"You have haven't you!" Callie laughed "what do you think your nickname is? McTitty?" Callie joked
"McPussy"! Mer suggested with more laughter
"Oh god Cal...I'm such a cliche". Mer laughed at herself
"Well currently only in your dreams...so you best sort something out in real life. Do it for Mark!" Callie chuckled
"Anyway...how are you Cal?"
"I'm good thanks. Alex and Jo are in New York this week as there's a big Peds conference They're staying on for the weekend and we're having a party on Saturday for some friends...a belated moving to New York."
"Oh that sounds fun...actually I think De Luca mentioned something about the conference the other day about Carina going as well."
Callie paused at the news that Arizona's ex would be at the same conference and whether Arizona knew and hadn't mentioned it. Before Callie's brain went into overdrive thinking of reasons why, Meredith changed the subject.
"So how are things going between you two? I think the last time we spoke you were trying to resist Arizona's advances!"
Callie let out a little chuckle "yeah well, surprise, surprise...I gave in! Seriously I took your advice and stopped worrying about it and just decided to go for it."
"And?" Mer asked
"Well I'm sure you don't want to hear about the sex, which for the record was
A-MAZ-ING, it's going really well. I don't wanna jinx it or anything, but it feels really good Mer...we're still taking things slowly, we see each other at the weekend, we speak most days and are opening up more"
"Ohhh how's that working out? Is the hundreds of dollars of therapy paying off?".
"On the whole...yeah I think it is. We had an issue last week in that she never wanted to stay over at mine, but I figured it out...it was the bed..."
"What's wrong with your bed Torres?" Mer asked amused "too many chains?"
"Ha ha. Very funny! It was nothing to do with the actual bed itself...more who was sleeping in it not so long ago!" Callie explained.
"Ahhh Perfect Penny...husband killer!"
"Ahh now Mer...come on..." Callie gave her friend a hard stare down the camera
"I'm sorry...I couldn't resist...and I know she didn't really kill my husband...but you're not together anymore, so what does it matter."
"Because it's not true!" Callie responded
"I know... I know...anyway...talking of Penny, have you heard anything from her at all?" Mer asked.
"No nothing. I'm not sure she knows I'm back with Arizona." Callie commented before adding "Although I know she stayed in touch with one of Sofia's friends mom, so I'm sure it's been reported back that we've picked her up together a couple of times."
"What have you said to Sofia?" Mer asked
"Nothing yet. We've only just had the are we girlfriend chat so it's too early." Callie said "we're both being careful so as not to frighten the other off"
"But you want it? You love her right?" Mer asked concerned
"Yeah totally. It's just we both need to be sure before we say anything to Sof. She's been through a lot and we just want to avoid causing her anymore upset if it can be avoided"
"I get that, but if you know YOU want it, then you must think that maybe Arizona isn't sure?" Mer challenged
"No...I mean when she first arrived we talked...A LOT...about what we wanted...about how it would work...and we both want it."
"Well that's brilliant Cal...so what's the holding you back?"
"Ummmm I dunno. I guess we're still getting to know each other again."
"Right...well you don't stop getting to know someone once you are with them...once you say you love them".
Meredith paused and looked at her friend. Callie had always rushed into things marriage to George, moving to New York with Penny, it was obvious that she was working hard to try to remove that element from her personality...but the spontaneity was also a big part of what made Callie who she was!
"Listen Cal...I know you have a therapist who know's a lot more about this than I do, and feel free to tell me to shut up, but remember you said you didn't recognise yourself at the end of your relationship with Arizona?"
"Yes, but what's that got to do it? things have changed a lot.." Callie responded
"I know they have, I know that you have both changed, and are trying really hard...but as my friend, and back up 'person'..."
"Jeez thanks!" Callie laughed at the back up comment, but she knew she could never take the place of Christina.
"...AS my back up person..." Mer continued with a smile "Don't ever stop being YOU...don't change so much because you think you have to..."
Callie looked confused
"Crap...I'm not explaining myself very well... the way I see it is that Arizona NEVER stopped loving you...not once...she might have screwed up a couple of times, but we all saw it. Even when she was shagging Eliza or Carina, her heart belonged to you. Don't change into something you are not because you think that's what she wants... because maybe she doesn't...maybe she wants the Callie she fell in love with all those years ago...maybe with a few tweaks...but you have to make sure you are happy in yourself if you want to make her happy. If you try and be someone so different to who you really are, then you are going to end up resenting her again."
"She hasn't asked me to change...I'm trying to change to be better...we're both trying to be better for each other!" Callie explained
"EXACTLY!" Mer shouted "that's my point...stop trying to be better for HER! Be better for YOU...be better for Calliope Torres".
Callie remained silent as she thought about Merediths words
"OK let me try and give an example...sooo we both know that you CAN, on occasions, be a little jealous right?"
Callie nodded in agreement "yeah but I'm working hard on that..."
"OK. Great but why?"
"Because I need to show Arizona that I trust her..." Callie replied
"Yeah you do...but you need to change for YOU TOO. Don't stop feeling jealous because you know Arizona won't like it...stop being Jealous because sitting there thinking what your girlfriend is up to all the time isn't good for your mental health. Every change you make... and let's face it, we can ALL be better people if we try...you have to be doing for YOU and not just for her. Don't lose yourself again is what I'm trying to say."
"OK I think I get it" Callie said slowly "So I should be ME..."
"Exactly! Be YOU Torres...be the person you are happy with and Arizona will love you...and more importantly you'll love yourself!"
"So if you are sure..." Mer continued before she was interrupted
"I AM!" Callie repeated
"Well just tell her Cal...tell her you love her if you want to...show her how great you are and how much she needs you. Have fun...be you...drink too much at the party...do your sexy dance...do your sexy dance with Arizona... because after all the shit you two have been through...you deserve some fun".
————
After the call Callie laid in bed thinking about what Mer has said about how she shouldn't change just to please Arizona. It was good advice. She made a promise to herself that she wasn't going to over think things and that she would show Arizona that she had made the right decision in coming to New York.
There was no doubt in Callie's mind, she had wanted Arizona from the moment Arizona had kissed her again. Every date they had had, every moment they had spent together since had just made her more certain that they were meant to be together...and this time for good.
She needed to be herself and that meant telling Arizona she loved her.
—————
Tuesday
Arizona was in her office finishing off her presentation when her assistant knocked on her office door
"Dr Robbins, these have arrived for you"
Arizona looked up from her laptop and saw Emma holding a huge bunch of beautiful Peonies - her favourite.
"Oh wow" Arizona said smiling as she took the flowers from her assistant "aren't they gorgeous. Thank you Emma." As she smelled the flowers and looked for a card.
"Ummm I'm about to head home now unless there's anything else you need me to do before tomorrow?" Emma asked
"No...I think we're good thanks Emma. I'll check in when I can and remember call if anything urgent comes up, I can be back here in 30 mins"
Emma smiled at her boss "Will do. Good luck with the talk, not that you need it. See you next week"
"Thanks Em. Have a good weekend if I don't speak to you before" Arizona said as she watched the young woman leave her office.
Arizona turned her attention back to the flowers and opened the gift card.
Arizona felt a wave of emotion come over her as she read the message
Good luck Mamma. You are AWESOME.
We love you very much" .
S C x
She took out her phone and took a picture of the flowers and sent them to Callie.
Thank you so much for my flowers. They are so beautiful. My faves. I love them. Please give Sofia a big kiss from me A x
Arizona hesitated before adding
PS I love you both very much too x
Callie was a home finishing up some work when she got Arizona's messages and a huge smile formed on her face pleased that the message had gone down well. Stage one was in play.
————-
Wednesday - day one of the conference
Arizona and Dr Herman entered the exhibition centre where the conference was taking place and completed their registration.
Slipping on their lanyards and name tags they made a plan to meet up at the first coffee break. Arizona had offered to stick with Nicole and help her become familiar with the new venue, but the Dr had shooed her away telling her to go work the room and be amazing to drum up more business. Many of the Dr's attending could refer work their way and a clinic without patients wasn't going to last long.
Arizona grabbed a coffee to go and check the attendance list in the pack she had been given. She had already made plans to meet up with some friends tonight at the gala dinner, but as she scanned the list she stopped when she got to page 3 and saw Carina De Luca, Grey-Sloan Memorial.
Shit! Alex could have warned her. She hadn't seen or spoken to Carina since the day she had told her she was moving to New York for Sofia's sake. Arizona had felt bad at the mixed messages she had given Carina as that wasn't really her. She had always tried to be honest with the people she was seeing, made sure they were both on the same page, but Arizona had not treated Carina fairly. Maybe, she would get the opportunity to talk so she could apologise to her.
"Robbins!" Arizona turned round to see Sam and a very striking looking woman who looked familiar heading towards her.
"Sam. Fancy seeing you here!" Arizona joked as she gave her friend a kiss on the cheek.
"Arizona I'd like you to meet Victoria" Sam said as beamed at the tall brunette who Arizona realised was the English doctor Sam had been virtually shagging whilst she had been staying at her. Victoria...Arizona thought thinking it was strange to hear her be called her actual name rather than babe, or honey, or what was it she used to hear Sam yell all the time...ah princess...that was it. Arizona smiled.
"Victoria is so lovely to meet you...Sam has talked about you a lot..." Sam shot Arizona a behave look "umm how long are you over for?"
"It's great to meet you too Arizona. Well I managed to swing an invite as one of the guest speakers for tomorrow session on cancer genome and I'm taking some leave next we..."
"Oh My God...you're Victoria St Hill!" Arizona interrupted the doctor mid sentence before she turned to her friend.
"Sam you little shit...you never told me you were shagging THE Victoria St Hill" Arizona gave her friend a slap on the arm, before she turned back to the English doctor who had done amazing work in gene-sequencing to help with cancer treatment.
"I'm sorry Dr St Hill...what I mean to say is that I'm a massive fan and can't wait for your talk tomorrow."
"Please..." she said laughing as she watched the two friends exchange dagger looks "..call me Vicky and that's very kind of you to say...but from what Sam has told me, you are equally as impressive Dr Robbins"
Arizona felt her cheeks blush slightly as she fangirled over the doctor.
"Alright you two..." Sam said "enough of the love in...you are giving me a massive under achievement complex" she said laughing before turning to Arizona.
"See you tonight...think the plan is to meet in the bar at 7."
"Yeap great. See you both later".
"Good luck for the session." Sam added "what time are you on?"
"We've got the slot just before lunch...you know the one when no one is really listening because they are too hungry!" Arizona laughed
"Could be worse..." Vicky joined in "could be the one after lunch when everyone is in a food coma having gorged on the buffet!"
"True" Arizona laughed "anyway, really nice to meet you Vicky and see you both tonight.
Once out of sight Arizona grabbed her phone and sent Sam a text message.
You sly dog...Can't believe Victoria St Hill is PRINCESS!!!
Fuck! Hate you Robbins. You have to swear to take that to your grave! She'll die if she knew you heard.
Arizona responded with five laughing emojis before adding
Hard not to mate! Seriously though Sam...good work...she's gorgeous...and an amazing doctor.. WTF she sees in you I'll never know ... :)
PS Love you and my lips are sealed.
————
Their talk had gone really well and Arizona was pleased to see a nearly full room. Nicole had used her humour to keep the audience's attention away from the thought of lunch and they had both discussed the success of their clinic and maternal mortality programme.
During the talk, Arizona had mentioned how a conversation with Dr Carina De Luca from Italy had got her thinking about the reason why mortality was so high in the US. She went on to say how talking to colleagues at conferences like this one, really could make a difference, and encouraged doctors to keep sharing information and discoveries to help the tiny people.
"As doctors we put our trust in science, in medicine, drugs and research whilst our patients put their trust in us. Trust is at the core of everything we do and before we end, as the buffet is waiting, I would just like to take this opportunity to personally thank Doctor Nicole Herman for putting her trust in me, even when at times I didn't deserve it. I feel very lucky to be here in New York with her today talking to you all about our work at the Robbins Herman centre for Woman's Health. "
Nicole and Arizona spent the lunch break shaking hands and swapping business cards from doctors from across the globe interested in the mortality project. Alex had come up and found the two doctors and given them both big hugs even though he hadn't particularly like Herman at the time, but he realised now what an amazing doctor she was.
Arizona excuses herself realising she hadn't peed in hours and headed to the restroom. As she washed her hands afterwards she heard the familiar Italian voice "hello Arizona"
Arizona looked up from the wash basin and saw Carina standing there. Turning off the tap and shaking her hands Arizona smiled "Carina. It's umm good to see you"
"You too. Your talk was great!" Carina smiled warmly.
"Thanks. How umm how have you been?" Arizona asked
"Busy...I'm settled in Seattle now..."
"That's umm that's great Carina...and Andrew?"
"He's good too"
Arizona realised how awkward the conversation was, they had seen each other naked, yet we're acting like they hardly knew each other and that was Arizona's fault.
"Listen, I have to go now, but would it be possible to meet for a drink later?"
Carina looked at Arizona who she had genuinely had strong feelings for, before she had left to move to New York. Maybe there was hope still. She looked hot in a red dress and that combination of the blonde hair and blue eyes still made Carina feel light headed
"I'd like that." She smiled.
"Great!" Arizona said relieved. "Meet at the roof top bar at 6?" Arizona suggested pleased that she would be able to apologise to Carina.
"See you then. Ciao Arizona"
————
Callie left the bathroom and headed outside and pulled her phone out to text Callie back who had messaged earlier to wish her good luck.
Can you talk? A x
Callie responded almost instantly by calling
"Hey is everything OK? How did it go?" Callie asked smiling down the phone at her girlfriend who looked hot in that red dress that she loved.
Arizona smiled back just seeing Callie's face
"yeah all fine...the talk went well."
"I knew you'd smash it!" Callie said proudly
"Thanks Cal. Listen I won't keep you as I know you have surgery soon, but I wanted to let you know that Carina's here...at the conference...I umm didn't know until I saw the attendance list"
Callie surprised Arizona by responding "I know"
"You know? How?" Arizona asked confused
"Mer mentioned it last night, but thanks for telling me. I appreciate it. Have you seen her yet?"
"Yeah briefly, but I've suggested we meet for a drink this evening as, well, I kinda owe her an apology...I wasn't very fair to her before I left for New York. Anyway, I just wanted to be upfront and let you know."
Callie smiled warmly "Thanks. Now go...enjoy the rest of the conference, say hi to Alex from me and have fun at the dinner tonight...but not TOO much fun!"
"Calliope...you know you have nothing to worry about don't you?" Arizona asked with concern in her voice.
Callie thought for a few seconds before responding "I know. " And she honestly meant it. She trusted Arizona and it felt good.
OK so let me know what you think? Is Meredith right with her advice?
I never really got the Arizona/Carina relationship. It felt like the writers just weren't sure what to do with them. They were together, then they weren't and she was shagging Owen, and then she wanted Arizona again, Arizona was asking her to stay, but talking about Callie when she was stoned. Anyway, I felt sorry for Carina in the show and I think Arizona owes her an apology.