CW: implied self-harm

Reijirou was starting to realize there were many different types of silence. A contented silence of two friends enjoying the same space was vastly different from the silence left hanging after an uncalled-for insult. This silence was one of shock, sure, but also of unease, discomfort. But, not really sorrow.

Gorou was the first to manage any words. "Man, what the fuck?"

"That was messed up…" murmured Seihiko.

Kenji actually laughed, in that strained, tense way people do when they're trying to deal with something traumatizing. "God, even he didn't deserve that."

"I hate this!" cried Rika. "How should I even feel about this?"

"However you wish, I suppose," Ikeda offered. He knelt down and picked up Take's hat from where it'd been abandoned on the floor, and stared at it with an inscrutable expression.

Homura's gaze seemed far away. "It's hopeless… We're never getting out of here, are we?"

"Now, I wouldn't say that!" said Monokuma. "There's still a chance someone may graduate. Seeing one person, or three people, fail at something doesn't mean one of you bastards can't give it a try! Do I need to break out the cheesy motivational posters?"

"Stop…" Shiori's eyes shone with angry tears. "Just stop all this! What is this really about? It can't just be 'despair,' or whatever! This is overkill no matter what you're after, and you don't just torture people like this for kicks!"

Monokuma actually paused before grinning. This grin, though, felt so much more sinister than Monokuma's usual smiles, for how calm it was. "It's what I was made for. I almost feel bad for you humans sometimes. Not having a purpose hardwired into you, unless you count propagating your species? It sounds so… dull. You should be happy I'm giving you something more to strive for! I can't tell you the 'why,' but I am doing this for a truly magnificent goal. If it goes to plan, you all will be the first step towards bringing back true despair! Upupupu! Well then, hasta-la-bye-bye, my little cretins!" And with that ominous declaration, Monokuma disappeared behind his podium.

Kashie opened her mouth, then closed it again. "What does that mean? Does… does it mean anything?"

"Can we go now?" Isao suddenly asked. Without waiting for an answer, he headed to the elevator. "I need to go."

"Isao?" Shiori followed after him. "Isao, what's going on?"

Reijirou's feet moved before he could finish considering if he should intervene. He rushed to the elevator, but Isao had already entered and door closed before he or Shiori could join him.

Shiori made a frustrated noise. "Ugh! What is going on with him? He's been distracted and nervous off-and-on this whole trial…"

Considering for a moment, Reijirou kept his voice soft and level. "It might be to do with things that happened before the trial, or even the investigation…" I have my suspicions, and the name of the game is 'food issues'...

"Oh…" Shiori looked down sheepishly. "We… never got to talk about our argument. I hope he knows that I don't… Well, that I get it? Or at least, I don't begrudge him feeling the way he does."

"Is that something you feel comfortable telling me about?"

She shook her head, but then sighed. "I made some assumptions, and pushed him to talk about things when he was clearly uncomfortable. I don't wanna say more than that."

Reijirou simply nodded in understanding and let the rest of the students join them as they waited for the elevator to return. As they waited, he tried to decide what to say in regards to the usual meeting. Will anyone even want to meet? Shiori will want to find Isao, and who knows if Homura and Seihiko will stay, though I really hope they do… Homura's behavior and deterioration was concerning, not to mention that Seihiko had literally been a hair's width away from to death. They both needed some help dealing with those issues.

As they all rode up in the elevator, Kashie carefully made her way to Reijirou's side. "That was… I was so scared, at the end. I thought Seihiko was gonna die. But I couldn't even think of anything to say to make Take stop…"

"Please. don't feel guilty about that," said Reijirou immediately, before she could continue. "That was a stressful situation for everyone. I'm just thankful I got him to back down."

Kashie frowned. "I'm… not sure I understand what he was trying to do, still. Why would someone knowing about the aspirin make him feel guilty for what he did versus not feeling guilty?"

Sighing, Reijirou shook his head a bit. "I can't know for sure, but I think… Take just wanted to know if any of us understood him, knew things about his life, or that he might have learned. I uh, only knew about that use for aspirin because my family's been tight on money for a long time. And honestly, it was a guess."

"I guess that makes sense." Kashie still seemed troubled, but Reijirou didn't actually have to ask her to continue. "I… I don't feel bad for him? But I also do feel bad about not feeling bad, because no one deserves to die like that, but he, he really didn't regret it, did he?"

"I don't know what he felt, to be honest." Reijirou sighed. "If he did regret it, his pride wouldn't let him admit it. But as for you, your feelings are totally understandable. It's…" He struggled to find the words. "It's possible to wish Take hadn't been executed, but be angry with what he did, or just with how he was as a person. It's probably still going to be difficult for a while, though. I… I know I'll hold this with me for a while."

Kashie paused, then gave Reijirou a small smile. "You really give good advice, you know? I uh, you seemed really sad yesterday and today, so I… I hope you know I appreciate it. Thank you."

Reijirou swallowed through the lump in this throat and nodded. "You're welcome. I just want to help."

Finally, they reached the surface. Reijirou steeled himself. Okay, let's make this a successful session! He cleared his throat. "Okay, I'm doing a group session here, so—"

"We know," Kenji grumbled. "I don't feel like spilling my guts about my best friend dying in front of everyone, thanks."

"Of course, if you want to talk alone, we can do that later," Reijirou offered.

"Sure," said Kenji. But he still walked off.

"And— and I still don't like you!" shouted Homura, who pointed a finger. She didn't seem scared, exactly, but certainly nervous and defiant.

Reijirou carefully turned to her, aware of making his body language as non-threatening as possible. "I can understand why you might not like me. I'm not forcing this on anyone."

Seihiko gave Homura a slightly pained look. "Homura, are you still gonna do this?"

"He's— He works for Monokuma!" She protested. "Monokuma is the reason for all of this, and Monokuma almost killed you!"

"Take almost killed me, and I really don't need a reminder of that!" Seihiko's voice sounded choked. "God, I just want to get my mind off of this, and I'd love to do that with you, but—"

"We can do that!" Homura snatched Seihiko and began pulling him away. "We… I can totally distract you!"

"Stop doing that!" Seihiko said as he pulled his arm free. "You always drag me off to do things, and I get that you don't wanna do the session thing, but you could at least let me do it! Or even just give me one damn moment to myself."

Homura jerked back, and, as if she was a balloon that had been popped, she deflated. "I… That's how you really feel?"

"Yes," said Seihiko. "I'm going to lay down." He paused before adding, "I think you could use some time to think too." Having said his piece, Seihiko left the fire pit.

Homura looked after him anxiously. She gave the rest of the group one anxious look before she also ran back towards the rest of the camp.

Wow, that blew up so fast, Reijirou thought, wringing his hands. Seihiko must be under so much stress for him to blow up like that. Would checking up on them personally be overstepping? Will Monokuma try to twist my words again?

"Okay, that's it." Reijirou realized someone had grabbed his sleeve. He looked down and saw that Gorou had snatched up his arm. Gorou continued, undeterred. "I have decided that we need a good old fashioned vent session. Let's go scream at the ocean."

Shiori, Rika, and Kashie seemed a bit surprised by Gorou's declaration, but nodded. Ikeda looked torn, actually. He shook his head. "I… I honestly would like to join in some way, but there's something I need to do. I just want to say…" He turned to Shiori. "Good work today." Then he turned on his heel and walked away.

Reijirou barely managed to catch Shiori's look of confusion before Gorou actually began leading him into the woods towards the sounds of the ocean. He watched as Gorou pulled them through the trees with a determined look on his face. "Um, Gorou, I'm okay with us doing this if it's what you want—"

He almost tripped over Gorou when the boy stopped.

Gorou turned to him. "This isn't for me. I mean, I'm totally up for screaming my heart out too, but you need this."

"I appreciate the thought," said Reijirou, "But I can handle my own feelings. I don't want to put that on you all."

Gorou rolled his eyes. "Okay, one; given how you've been acting, I highly doubt you've actually been doing that. And two; I have older brothers your age. I know even adults need to vent. You can wait until the others leave if you want, but I'm staying until you actually talk about how fucked up this all is. Because this situation is awful for us, yeah, but it's bad for you too."

Blinking, Reijirou asked, "What… what brought this on? You didn't seem interested in interacting with me after the motive yesterday."

"Because I thought it might help!" Gorou whispered harshly. "I figured Monokuma didn't need any more ammo for hurting you, so I'd keep my distance. But, you've been a wreck! And I realized what you needed more than anything was… a friend. So yeah. We're friends now. No, I am not accepting arguments."

Reijirou was stunned into silence for the rest of the walk. He… he really is perceptive when he wants to be. I could really use this… and seeing me vent might encourage them to do so as well. Still, he felt hesitant. Maybe I'll… start with the less intense things that have been bugging me.

In the end, it only took five to ten minutes to reach the edge of the island. Through the fence Reijirou saw a rocky beach and the dark ocean beyond. He turned to see Shiori, Kashie, and Rika had followed not far behind.

Rika was the one to voice the question hanging in the air. "So… how do we do this?"

"Easy," said Gorou. Then, he turned to the shore, and gave a long, angry scream. Once he was finished, he sighed, satisfied. "Man, that felt good. You should try it."

"We just yell?" asked Rika.

"You can also yell about the things that are bothering you," Reijirou suggested. "It can be good just to get the thoughts or feelings out in the open, instead of hanging on to them and just letting them fester in your head. It doesn't even have to be deep." He gave a side glance to Gorou, who just raised an eyebrow. Well, I guess I'm doing this.

Reijirou stepped forward, took a deep breath, and yelled, "Why does the kitchen stock everything except my favorite brand of canned ice tea!? Yeah it's really cheap, but it's my comfort drink, dang it!"

There was a moment of silence. Reijirou now realized he might not have picked the best example, but then Shiori snickered a bit. Smiling, she added, "Yeah! I spent the first three days here searching for my go-to soda and you don't even have it, Monokuma?! It's not even an expensive brand!"

"Are we just… complaining about food?" Kashie wondered.

"Nah," said Gorou, before turning back to the beach. "Yo Monokuma, fuck off into the next century!"

"I wanna go!" Rika ran right up next to Reijirou and cupped her hands around her mouth to amplify her voice. "Take is the worst! Monokuma is also the worst!"

"Yes they are!" Shiori was getting into it. "None of us deserved any of this torture! I just wanna go home and see my parents and my friends and my school, and have things go back to normal!"

"I wanna leave too, but I think I'd rather not go home, actually!" Reijirou immediately put his focus back on Rika as she continued. "Because, I think my managers are bad, so I'd rather just live with Mr. Saiki!"

Oh boy, we're back on this. Time to address it. "Rika," He murmured. "Do you think your managers are looking for you?"

Rika pouted. "No."

"Are any of your managers your biological parents?"

"No! Definitely not; they said so. I don't know if I have those. And even if I did, I don't know them! They could be bad too! Can't I live with you?"

Reijirou felt his heart breaking. She really doesn't have anyone. If none of them really are her biological parents, finding them could be impossible. And since she doesn't remember them, would it even be right to have her go back to her biological parents? "I… I can't promise that. But when we get out of here, I will make sure where you end up is safe." He looked back at everyone else. "That goes for everyone."

Reijirou saw Shiori give Gorou a look, but he shrugged. "I see that look; I'm fine."

"You like living with your aunt?" Shiori still seemed concerned.

Rika took a step closer to him. "Do you not have parents too?"

"No…" Gorou trailed off. Taking a moment, as if to ready himself, he blurted out, "I ran away from home, technically. My parents don't know where I'm living right now. Not because my parents were hurting me or anything, but I just… yeah."

Keeping the expression on his face to only mild shock was surprisingly difficult for Reijirou. He's come a long way, if he's willing to share this with us.

Kashie finally properly joined the group at the forest's edge. "Um, why did you run away then?"

"Well, my parents do kinda suck. Same with my three oldest brothers. For context, Ichirou and Jirou are twins; they're almost 30 now. Saburou's next, then Shirou, then me." Gorou glared out at the ocean again. "When I was really little, things were mostly okay, I guess. Then Ichirou started winning all these chess competitions, and Jirou was moving so fast through his fencing lessons that the teacher said he could make it to the world championship soon. Basically, if 'Ultimate' was a title that actually meant something, that's what they would've been. And it all went to their heads. Basically, just me and Shirou managed to avoid it. Mostly because we got ignored, and didn't just wanna ride coat tails like Saburou did."

"That sounds really hard," said Reijirou. "I'm glad you and Shirou stayed close."

Gorou blushed a little, a small smile gracing his usually stern face. "Yeah… Anyway, things had to change when Shirou realized how good I was at snow sculpting. I didn't really notice how good at it I was before he told me. And I really didn't want to be thrown into the spotlight, paraded around to make the family even more famous. So Shirou helped me get away to my aunt's up in Sapporo, and the rest of its history."

"At least you had your aunt!" said Rika, trying to be reassuring.

"Eh, she isn't around much. I'm in the apartment by myself most of the time."

Kashie wrung her hands. "How… how long ago was this? When did you move?"

Gorou actually had to pause to consider that.

This does not bode well, thought Reijirou.

"Five years ago, I think?"

"Five years!?" Reijirou couldn't help from blurting it out. The teens stared at him as he chided himself. Now you've stuck your foot in it, Reijirou. "I'm sorry, I just… Gorou, you realize this isn't okay, right? You should not have had to move to live with someone who didn't really help you at such a young age."

"You're making a bigger deal of it than it really was." Gorou shrugged again. "She might not have been there much, but Aunt Hiroko is pretty chill. And, I could take care of myself so…" He sniffed, then rubbed a sleeve over his eyes. "It's fine. 'Specially compared to what Rika went through."

Shiori frowned. "It's clearly not. You can be upset about this." She carefully stepped up next to him and stood just close enough that their shoulders touched. Gorou gave a tiny flinch, but stayed. "That's what venting is for!" She screamed, "Gorou deserves better!"

"Yeah! 'Cause he's super cool and determined!" Rika chimed in.

Kashie gave a small nod, and gave her best shout. "And! It's silly to compare the bad things that happened to us anyway! You're strong, Gorou. Really."

Gorou's breath hitched again, and immediately took a step back. "I… I'm gonna just… go over here." Just as he passed Reijirou he whispered, "You can come, I guess." Then he ran back into the woods.

Reijirou considered. Shiori, Rika, and Kashie seemed concerned, but made no move to follow. "I'll make sure he's okay," he said. "You guys can keep doing this, or head back."

Finding Gorou was not hard; he sat under a tree, knees pulled up and head down. Carefully, Reijirou sat down beside him. "Hey. Was that a bit much?"

Gorou gave the counselor a choked laugh. "How are they so nice? It almost doesn't feel real. I've wanted people to just, see me, not my talent, but now that it's happening, it— I don't know I'm really… all that."

"They see so much in you," Reijirou said. "And I do, too."

"I'm… I don't know if I'm strong." Slowly, as if he was unsure, Gorou pulled down one of his long sleeves to show his arm, wrapped in bandages. "I keep the bandages, in case my sleeves get caught. I don't want people to… see that side of me. The weak side, that… wanted to escape."

Oh Gorou… Reijirou wanted to hug the boy, but doubted he'd appreciate the contact. "You are strong. To keep going when it's difficult is one of the strongest things you can do."

"I guess." Gorou gave him a small smirk. "You still need to vent properly. 'Cause I doubt all your issues come from not having the right tea."

"Darn, I'd hoped you'd forgotten about that..." Reijirou sighed, then stood back up. "Maybe… cover your ears? And I'm not facing you. I'm not venting at you."

Gorou just nodded and covered his ears. Turning around, Reijirou took a deep breath, and just screamed. No words, just raw emotion. He had to pause to catch his breath. That did feel good. Still, the others might hear if I keep shouting.

Instead, Reijirou chose to ramble. About how much he hated Monokuma for putting him and everyone else in this position, how helpless he felt in the face of the mounting tragedies, how worried he was about his mother back home, how concerned he was that they hadn't been found. And how much he prayed that everyone would be safe even after they escaped.

Finally, the words ran out. Reijirou swallowed, throat a bit dry from the barrage of words. Looking back behind him, he saw Gorou removing his hands from his ears. "Feel better?"

"Yeah," Reijirou replied. "And you?"

"...Yeah, actually." Gorou stood too. "But I know that not everyone's okay. And, you're gonna try to help, because of course you will. Just… either be sneaky about it, or don't let Monokuma's retaliation get to you. Actually, do both of those things. And give yourself space to like, feel things."

Reijirou stuck out a hand. "It's a promise. Just remember to take your own advice."

Gorou smiled and shook his hand.

Reinvigorated, Reijirou trotted through the tree, back to the path, all the way back to his destination; the mess hall. First up on the list of 'everybody else' is one danseur, who I'm guessing will be here. He entered the mess hall and carefully opened the door to the kitchen. Looks like I'm right.

Isao had thrown open all of the cabinets in the kitchen and was frantically pulling packaged sandwiches from the fridge. A huge pile of packaged food and fruit sat on one of the counters. Reijirou couldn't see Isao around the fridge door, but he could hear breathing just a touch too fast to be normal. Not wanting to startle him too much, Reijirou gave a small knock on the door frame before fully entering the room. "Hey."

Unfortunately, despite the counselor's caution, Isao still jumped near out of his skin, and slammed the fridge shut as he stared at Reijirou. He opened his mouth slightly, as if to explain himself, but immediately, he shut it again.

Reijirou gulped, but then he had an idea. Let's break this tension. Slowly but casually, he walked into the kitchen and opened one of the lower cabinets. He pulled out a picnic basket and set it on the counter next to Isao's pile of food. "It'll be hard to carry all that without something to put it on. Will this work?"

Isao blinked, then began to stutter. "I— I mean, I can just put this back. I got, uh…"

"It's no problem. We have plenty of food. If you wanna have some in your cabin or just on hand, that's fine."

"...Really." Isao looked skeptical.

Reijirou shrugged, but smiled. "I'm certainly not stopping you. And if it helps you feel secure—"

"I'm fine," Isao interrupted. The tone of his voice was less defiant, and more defensive.

Reijirou took a tiny step towards the boy. "I know. But you're allowed to not be fine. If you reach out for help, there are people who will step up. You don't have to just… hold it in." He laughed wistfully. "We can work on that together, I guess."

The tension in Isao's shoulders dissipated slightly, but Isao's body language remained closed off. "I… I suppose."

"I hope you do." Reijirou went back to the kitchen door, but before he left, he added, "And, I know that it's none of my business, but I hope you can make up with Shiori. She really wants to be friends again, I think. But that's up to you two."

Once the door was shut behind him, Reijirou sighed. He knew what he'd need to deal with when he got back to his office. But, I can't put it off forever. How to approach it…? When it came to Monokuma, he was still unsure what the best approach even was. He'd tried playing along, and he'd tried speaking out against him. By the time he made it to the office, Reijirou had decided a… neutral strategy would be best. Losing my temper won't help. But, I can't just go along with it either.

He was glad he'd made that decision, because as soon as Reijirou sat down, he heard the familiar click of the monitor turning on. "Upupupu! Now that was a trial!" Monokuma spun in his chair. "Twists, turns, false confessions! The passion! The defiance until the very end! Hell, I don't even mind the hostage situation, which you handled very nicely, by the way. Good job stepping up. That's why I keep you on the payroll, even when you're being a whiny lil' bitch."

Reijirou felt his cheek twitch. "I mean, you don't actually pay me, but sure. And, of course I tried to stop Take. Seihiko didn't need to die." None of them have needed to die. Even Take. Punishment, sure. But not death. But, of course, he didn't say that. "Is that all for today?"

"Come on, you know the drill by now!" Monokuma chided. "Give me an update! How do you expect the brats to react going forward?"

Reijirou could feel a bit of nervous sweat beginning to drip down his next, but he kept his cool. "I think… you don't give yourself enough credit. You've been doing just fine in picking the motives yourself. And as I said, I'm going to focus on keeping everyone sane, as best I can."

"What? That's boring! Give me something! Rika and Kenji just lost their anchors in this game. Don't tell me you think either of them are just gonna be fine!"

"They aren't as unmoored as you think," murmured Reijirou. "In fact, at this point, everyone has at least one person to help keep them sane." Shiori's group likes Rika and Kenji enough that they'd be welcomed easily, and Homura has Seihiko, although that dynamic could be breaking down. I'll want to keep an eye on them. Ikeda… he's at least been better about spending time with the group. Hopefully that's enough.

Monokuma finally stopped his chair. "Wow, looks like our campers are just a big bag of friendship, eh? Well, I've got just the thing for that already lined up! Upupu!" The bear's laughing face blinked out as the t.v. shut off.

Reijirou relaxed in this seat, but only a fraction. Monokuma is going to be working even harder to make cracks in the groups that have formed now. I… I've been trying to be professional, but this isn't a formal setting. This is an emergency. I can't keep worrying about the difference between being an authority and being a friend. I can't keep waiting for them to come to me. I just need them to be safe. With that, he grabbed his notepad and pen, and headed out the door. Let's check in with everyone else personally. Even the ones who don't want my help deserve to know someone's making sure they're okay.

Takeo Ikeda stood in the gym of the abandoned barracks. In his hands he held a sledge hammer, inaccessible in the nature center until after the trial. He raised up the hammer and brought it down on the doorknob of the side room once, twice, three times. Then it broke into jagged pieces on the floor. The hammer still in hand, he pushed open the door.

The side room was small, of course. It was basically empty. Besides the door he entered from, there was the door outside. And, in the center of the room, a trap door. It was different from the one built into the floor of the mess hall stage. It looked older; grimy, and rusted. A sign on the wall read, 'Air Raid Shelter & Tunnel Access Below.' Upon close examination, Ikeda saw the telltale signs that it had been used recently.

"Not so abandoned now, are you?" He mused to himself as he looked up to one corner of the small room, where, hidden in shadow, a tiny camera watched the room silently. He smirked, made a rude gesture at the camera, and exited the room.

Back in the gym, he took a seat beside the door and pulled out a paper. He marked the gym with a little star on the hand drawn map. It joined the various other stars on the map. Sure, he'd had to fill in the map as more areas of the island had opened up. But even with what had opened already, he was making progress on a new map. Not a map of what he could see, but a map of what he was certain lay beneath everyone's feet.

"You aren't doing this alone, Monokuma. And, when I get to your lackeys, whoever they are, there will be no mercy."

Chapter 3: Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop

END

Look at that! We finished Chapter 3! It was a wild time for me, and I hope you all enjoyed it. The story is about halfway done, at this point? I plan on doing the standard six chapters plus epilogue. As always, thank you all so much for reading. If you'd leave a review with your thoughts, about this chapter or the story as a whole, I'd really appreciate it. If you'd like to join the discord for this story, where there are discussions of the chapters, fun chatting about characters, AUs, art, and much more, the link is in my profile. There's also a poll there to pick Free Time events. Thanks so much to carryingstarlightinherwake on AO3 for editing the chapter, and I'll see you all next time for the start of Chapter 4!