Chapter Twenty ~ Not Today

Inspired By: Not Today ~ Twenty One Pilots

March 14th, Present Day

Flowers were starting to bloom. The grass starting to become green again. The tree's never lost any leaves in Texas, but they did gain back their verdant color. The air was warm, the soft breeze peaceful. Ocean skies and wispy clouds set above the City of Retroville. If they had an ocean nearby, it would be perfect weather to just lay in the sun and listen to the waves.

Her father had stayed far longer than Cindy expected him too. Two months away from his luxurious life in LA. She thought for sure that Nila would combust from all of the inconveniences of the middle class. Every time Cindy saw her, she had that look of 'dear god, can I just leave this shit hole?' written all over her face. It's funny how LA changes a person. After all, Nila had lived in Retroville for years before even meeting Liam. She was middle-class. And now that she's got a taste of luxury, she seemed to forgotten where she came from. Cindy wondered if that would happen to her?

No...Cindy wouldn't let that happen.

Liam and Nila did eventually take leave. Her father saying that he had a very important business deal to close within the coming weeks, and that he needed to be there in person. It was weird. Two months ago, Cindy would have been thrilled to watch him get on a plane and go back to where he came from. But...now...things had changed.

Cindy and her father still had miles to go, but...everyday...it was getting better. There were even a few times she had called him 'daddy'. He was trying. He was really trying. And for the first time in a while, Cindy felt like she actually had a father again. He came to a few of her doctor's appointments, had dinner with Jimmy and Cindy multiple times, and even met Jimmy's parents over lunch.

Which, alone, was an interesting...experience.

When Judy and Hugh found out about Cindy moving to LA, they took the news better then Jimmy had anticipated. Judy was sad, of course. Her first grandchild and she would be limited to the time she got to spend with her. She told Cindy she would facetime her so much, she was bound to get sick of her.

To which, Cindy had laughed and said, "I wouldn't have it any other way."

His mother was skeptical about Liam at first and his track record with Cindy and her mother, but after the lunch he seemed to hit a soft spot and Judy, much to her surprise, began to warm up to him.

Afterwards, in the car, she told Cindy, "You're right. He's a charismatic son of a bitch."

To which Cindy responded, "Where do you think I get it from?"

They laughed the whole ride home.

Hugh was more of a simple mind. His philosophy was, if Cindy and Jimmy are happy, then I'm happy. Liam seemed to charm Hugh immediately upon their first meeting. Talking up a storm about business and life in a LA, and how it really is quite the experience. If anything, all the lunch did was fuel Hugh into thinking Cindy was a 'connection' he now had in Hollywood.

Jimmy face palmed. "Dad, just because she's moving to LA doesn't mean she's going to be interacting with movie stars."

"Cindy-" Hugh ignored Jimmy. "If you ever need extras for a movie or-or-a commercial or a TV show-or anything really! Just remember, your old pal Hugh would be perfect for the role."

To which, Cindy chuckled and shot Hugh a wink. "Don't worry, I got you. I'll give you the hook up, I promise."

Jimmy nearly spit out his drink, while Judy burst into laughter. Hugh never hugged Cindy so tight.

It was crazy, what the past two months have been. They seemed to go by so incredibly fast. And Cindy wasn't going to lie, when her father said goodbye at the airport, there was a part of her that was sad to see him go. But she knew it wasn't forever. Liam had promised to return by the end of April. Melanie was due on the 14th, so by then, Cindy should have hopefully given birth.

Key word, hopefully. God, she really hoped so.

She never believed pregnant women so much in her life when they told her the last month was the worst. Because by god, it was. Cindy was huge. Like, actually, huge. She didn't even think her stomach could stretch that much. She couldn't stand up on her own anymore. Her back was so sore. She felt Melanie, constantly. That damn kid never left her alone. All hours of the day she was moving around. Cindy couldn't even remember the last time she got a full nights rest. It drove her absolutely crazy.

She was so ready to have this baby. She was so over being pregnant. Her irritability was through the roof. Everything annoyed her, more so then normal. She was tired all the time, and starving 24/7. She could never get comfortable, and she cried all the time. Over literally nothing. Cindy never thought she would turn out to be that pregnant girl that sobbed over little things like dropping a spoon on the ground or watching a squirrel cross the road. But fuck, it was happening.

She didn't deserve Jimmy. She really didn't deserve Jimmy. He did everything for her. Even when she was yelling at him, he got her everything and whatever needed or wanted. Cindy had never seen him have more patience in all of the 9 years of knowing him. It was insane. She thought for sure, if there was any a time for them to bicker back and forth, it would be this last unbearably painful month. But to each of their surprise, they seemed to be on good terms. Really good terms. Jimmy even seemed...happy...

Cindy wished she knew what was going on in that head of his. Sometimes he would just stare off into the distance for hours. Just lost in thought about god knows what. He seemed to be doing better, but Cindy still wondered if he was just putting on a mask so she wouldn't worry. She tried to talk to him, but he always avoided the subject. It's always, 'I'm fine, don't' worry. I'll let you know if I'm not.' He didn't get angry when she asked, but she could tell it made him uncomfortable. I was hard, seeing him struggle. And Cindy gave him so much support. But sometimes she couldn't help but wonder, is it enough? Melanie was just around the corner. She needed him to be here. She needed him to be ok.

But today, she didn't want to think about that. She didn't want to worry. Today would be a good day, she told herself. Because today, was Jimmy's 18th birthday. Not only was it his 18th birthday, but it was a day that would go down in history. The day that Jimmy Neutron, willing decided, to get a tattoo.

"I can't believe you're actually committing to this."

The two of them stood in the waiting room of a small, but very clean and quaint, tattoo shop right outside of Retroville. It was a cute little brick building, right on the corner of a pretty busy strip. Large windows with pretty impressive artwork hung in the windows, a small leather couch and a few chairs tucked into the corner for guests, and even a vending machine with water, soda and candy sat at the very far end of the room. Jimmy nodded his head in approval, not bad for a little hole in the wall shop.

"I told you," Jimmy chuckled. "I've been wanting to do this for a year."

"Yeah, but I never thought you would actually go through with it." Cindy tugged on his hand.

It was true. Jimmy had been thinking about this for a while now. Growing up, he always had a fascination and appreciation towards art. It was so interesting to him how one simple painting or drawing could contain an entire story. How a color scheme could set a mood, or a tone. How subtle little things could portray big and meaningful messages. Tattoos, were no different. He didn't really think about getting one for himself until about halfway through junior year. He had found this sketch from the 60s, stashed in-between some of his dad's old records. It was a simple flyer of some sorts, noting special. But what had caught Jimmy's eye, was the plain and simple drawing, of a rocket ship.

That's when the idea hit him.

"Jimmy, right?" A man approached the two of them. Late 30s, shaved head, pale skin with tattoos covering most of his body. They ranged from really elaborate pieces of impeccable artwork, to small little symbols and words and other various fillers.

"Yeah, that's me."

"Nice to meet you, I'm Dairen." He shook Jimmy's hand sternly, and it when then he started to get nervous.

"So, I've got everything drawn up, if you want to take a look. And if you have anything you want to change, we can adjust if needed, or if it's good to go, we can get started."

Dairen lead them to the back end of the shop, past the counters and a few other customers already halfway through their own tattoo. His station was a small section, but still, clean and professional. He reached down and picked up a piece of paper and handed it to Jimmy.

He turned facing away from Cindy.

"What, I'm not allowed to see it?" Cindy scoffed.

"Not until it's done." Jimmy smirked. He looked it over, carefully. His eyes falling over the page, taking in every detail, every mark, every spot of shading.

It was perfect.

"Let's do it." Jimmy said, handing the drawing back to Dairen.

"Alright, have a seat."

Jimmy was no idiot. He knew how painful this experience was going to be. He never considered himself to be super wimpy, but he's heard enough stories to know what kind of pain he was getting himself into. So as he sat down in the black leather chair, he took a deep breath, mentally preparing himself for what would most likely be a very unpleasant hour or so. He was getting the tattoo on the inside of his forearm, which-from what he was told, wasn't too sensitive of an area and actually was known for one of the least painful places to get tattooed.

He hoped, at least.

"Nervous yet?" Cindy sat down in the chair provided next to him, arching her back awkwardly from the belly that seemed to always be in her way no matter what she did.

"I'm fine."

"Liar." Cindy shot him a look. "It's gonna hurt, you know."

Another deep breath. "I'll be fine."

"I don't know, I heard that shit really hurts. Libby told me her step-brother passed out when he got his."

"I think I can handle it." He shot her a glance as Dairen slipped on a pair of gloves. Taking Jimmy's right arm with one hand and a disinfectant wipe in another.

"You think?" Cindy teased.

It was then, that Dairen placed Jimmy's arm on the small platform he had placed in front of him. Behind him, were small little caps filled with black ink. He pulled a plastic package out of a draw next to him along with a few various small boxes. It took Jimmy a second to realize that the boxes were needles, and the package was a razor. Once the area of his arm was prepped, he took the stencil out from another draw.

He purposely made sure he angled his station so Cindy couldn't see.

"This is so unfair." Cindy pouted

Jimmy laughed. "Just wait until it's done."

Cindy shook her head as her phone vibrated in her hands. "Libby and Sheen are on their way. I guess they just need to pick up Carl."

"Tell me again why they're all coming?"

"One. It's your birthday, in case you forgot. Two, you really think they're gonna pass up an opportunity to watch you get a tattoo?"

Jimmy rolled his eyes, a smirk at his lips. "I feel so loved."

"Ready?" Dairen's voice carried over to the two of them.

Jimmy took another breath. It's now or never, he thought to himself. And once he start's, there's no going back. It's there forever.

Cindy eyed him curiously as he nodded, tilting his head back, eyes on the ceiling. He didn't want to watch. "As ready as I'll get."

"Let me know if you need a break at any point." And he lowered the needle.

It hurt. It really fucking hurt.

He knew it was going to, but knowing something vs actually going through it were two completely different things. He tried to just focus on the ceiling. He counted all 798 tiles. 4 times. In a row. Cindy had asked if he wanted to hold her hand. He was sure she meant well, but he could see the patronizing smirk on her lips.

He continued to stare at the ceiling. Cindy giggled as she smacked his thigh playfully.

He wasn't sure how much time had passed but too soon did he hear Libby's obnoxious voice pierce through the air. Jimmy turned his head to see, not only Libby, but Carl and Sheen close behind. They made their way over to Dairen's station, behind the counter's still, but close enough to watch.

"I can't fucking believe you're doing it." Sheen shook his head, leaning over the counter to try and catch a glimpse, but from there it just looked like a black inky mess.

"I honestly didn't think you had it in you, Jimmy." Libby leaned next to Sheen. "I'm seriously impressed."

Jimmy closed his eyes. "It hurts more when I talk."

Cindy laughed. "You're such a baby."

"Hey! You have no idea what this feels. I'd like to see how you'd handle it." Jimmy shot back, defensively.

"I think I'd be fine." Cindy said with a cocky smile.

"Oh yeah?"

"I'm a women. And women have a higher pain tolerance then men."

"That's-"

"True." Libby interrupted. "Why do you think we're the ones who birth babies? A man would never be able to do that."

Jimmy hated that she was right.

"So how much longer?" Carl asked, curiously.

"A few hours?" Dairen answered. "It's only been 20 minutes."

"It's only been 20 minutes!?" Jimmy's eyes flew back open.

They all just laughed. Even Dairen.

Fuck. This really was a mistake.

"Let me see!"

Two hours and 45 painstaking minutes later-finally, it was done. By the end, his arm was completely numb. But honestly, Jimmy thought it was better that way. The pain was finally gone, and Jimmy felt like he could breathe again. He actually felt proud that he made it through the whole thing. And with only one break at the halfway mark. They all took bets that he wouldn't be able to make it through period. He shot them all a look when Dairen finally said it was over. They all muttered under their breath as they each handed over 5 dollars. Even Cindy. Jimmy just laughed.

They all gathered around, as Jimmy stood up. Still, he hadn't looked. Not through the entire tattoo, he forced himself wait. He wanted it to be a surprise. Cindy had tried to take a peek, mostly in the beginning, but Dairen did a good job of shielding her and the others as well.

Jimmy looked first, standing in front of the mirror. He had no words. It was everything he wanted and more. And suddenly, everything was worth it. He took a breath, and despite Cindy and the other's voices blaring in the background, it felt silent. It was emotional, suddenly. He really did it. He really went through with it. This piece of art was with him forever. The rocket ship was with him forever.

"Come on, man!" Sheen was practically leaning over the entire counter. "Let us see!"

"Jimmy!" Cindy reached her hands out towards him, signaling she needed help getting up. He turned around and helped and as he did, Cindy took his forearm in her hands. She too, fell silent as she finally got to see.

It was beautiful. Truly, beautiful. The black ink and dot work shading was impeccable. The line work, near perfect. But what really took Cindy's breath away, was what it was. It was his rocket ship. The very first one. The one he built when they were kids. The one they had so many adventures and memories with. Every detail was perfect. It looked exactly like she remembered it. Aside from the rocket ship, which was the main focus, behind it was a black circle filled with planets and stars. Outer space permanently apart of his skin forever.

"What do you think?" Jimmy's voice was low as Cindy looked up.

"It's gorgeous. My god, Jimmy, it's….it's amazing."

"Oh my—fucking—god, get your skinny ass over here!" Libby shouted from behind the counter.

Jimmy laughed and walked over to where the others were standing, outstretching his arm for them to finally see and stop their bitching.

They too, were speechless.

"Dude." Sheen shook his head. "This is so good. Like honestly, so fucking good."

"It's the ship…like, actually. It's actually the fucking rocket ship." Said Libby.

"And the detail is impeccable." Carl tilted his head to the side.

"I got it for us." Jimmy explained. "For all of us. This is what started everything. I never want to forget that."

"Awwww," Libby teased. "You do love us!" She grabbed his cheek like his mother.

"Jimmy, man, you gonna make me cry!" Sheen laughed while pretending to wipe a tear away.

"You're making me feel things." Carl just shook his head. "You know I don't like to feel things!"

Cindy came up behind Jimmy and wrapped her hands around his waist. It was hard with her stomach, but she made it work as she pushed up on her tippy toes and placed a kiss on his cheek. "I love it, baby."

"Alrighty, now that that's over with, we can finally get to the best part of a birthday!" Sheen threw his hands in the air.

"Which is?" Carl asked curiously

"Getting drunk!"

Libby face palmed. "Sheen. We're in a public place."

"And besides," Jimmy intercepted. "Cindy can't drink. It wouldn't be fair."

"What?! Oh come on!" Sheen exclaimed.

"Sheen." Libby just shot him a look.

He just folded his arms over his chest like a pouty child.

Jimmy gave his utmost appreciation to Dairen, who was more than gracious. When it came to paying for the tattoo, Cindy, to his surprise, paid half and told him to keep the rest. It's your birthday, baby. You deserve it, she had said. He would have argued, but she was right. He did deserve it. He had been really overwhelmed lately with Mel just around the corner. He needed this. He really needed this.

They went out to lunch to celebrate, to which Sheen pouted over the fact of no booze on a birthday. Libby just gave him a look which made him fall silent. They all erupted into laughter. Jimmy couldn't remember the last time he laughed this much. He missed them. He missed them more than he was ready to accept. His arm was sore. Really sore, but he couldn't stop looking at it. Even through the plastic that was wrapped temporarily around it, it was truly something else. Jimmy smiled. Today was a good day. Today was a really good day.

It was later in the evening when Libby stopped them before entering the lab.

"Ok. So, we have a surprise for the both of you." Libby clasped her hands together.

Jimmy gave her a look. "For both of us?"

Libby nodded excitedly. "Sheen, open the door."

The door opened, but it was not the lab that was presented in front of them. It was….so much more than that.

It had been completely transformed. The entry way no longer filled with strange inventions and wires and machines, but now a cozy foyer. A nice couch and coffee table long with a fake fireplace. Further down, was the living room with Jimmy's computer now tucked neatly in the corner of the room. Next to the computer was a huge floor to ceiling bookcase which contained hundreds of books and various little inventions Jimmy had wanted to keep. The small make-shift kitchen, was updated to a complete kitchen, although still small. There was a curtain hung across the back part of the lab, which was tied back currently to reveal double bed, and a pink bassinet.

"Ta-da!" Libby exclaimed as they all walked through. Cindy and Jimmy were speechless as they took in everything. "Since you didn't want a baby shower, which I respect, we all still wanted to give you guys a gift for when the baby comes. And what better gift then to finish the transformation of the lab! Now, I know Cin is going to be living in LA for the most part, but you guys are still gonna need a place to stay when you come and visit! And especially since you're not leaving until after the summer!"

Cindy hadn't realized she was crying until after she blinked the tears from her eyes, unconsciously. "Libby. I have no words. I can't believe you did this. Me and Jimmy were content with waiting for more money to finish. Where did all the furniture come from?"

"We all pitched in." Carl spoke up. "We knew you guys needed to keep the money you have for Mel. So we all went bought new furniture."

"God knows you needed it." Said Sheen with a smirk.

"Happy Birthday." Libby said to Jimmy. "And Happy baby shower-ish?" Libby laughed as she turned to Cindy.

Jimmy was the one who reached out and gave Libby a hug. He couldn't remember the last time he and Libby actually had a moment like this. It was nice. He never realized how close they had become since Cindy's pregnancy. She was like a sister to him. It was emotional to think about. He always wanted a sister. When he pulled back, Libby wiped the tear that escaped down his cheek.

She smiled. "I don't think I've ever seen you cry."

"Shut up."

Cindy laughed as she pulled Libby into her own embrace. The two cried for what felt like hours.

It was late now. Cindy was fast asleep, the blankets draped gracefully over her sleeping form. Her golden hair spread out against her pillow. He sat with his back up against the wall. The dim light from side table illuminating just half of his face. He was tired, but something kept him up. This happened most nights. It doesn't bother him anymore. He's gotten used to it.

He stared at his tattoo. The lines and ink bringing him into a trance. Mesmerized by the stars and the planets and the perfect rocket ship in the center. It reminded him of a simpler time. A time when he didn't stay up all through the night. A time where it wasn't hard to just live and do the simplest of things. A time where he was normal.

Today was a good day. He was happy today, but now he felt nothing. Even after everything, it always came back to this. It always came back to darkness. Jimmy took a breath, letting his eyes fall close as he tilted his head to the ceiling. No. Today was a good day. He smiled today. A real smile. He cried today. Tears of happiness, not sorrow. He lived today. He allowed himself to feel the sun on his skin and love in his heart. No. He wouldn't give in to the darkness today. Not today.

Not today.

And that night, when sleep did take him, he dreamt of a rocket ship.