A/N: Very slight mention of sexual themes and self-harm in this chapter, you have been warned

Chapter Twenty

Christmas At Ethel's

The two girls kissed one another gently at first before it deepened into a hungry desperate kiss and they fell onto the bed together, layers of clothes were taken off, flesh was exposed, touches were made and sex was performed as moans of pleasure filled the silence from the girls.

Suddenly Ethel shot her eyes open in shock as she woke up from the dream, sweaty, surprised and with heat between her legs. She moved to quickly sit up ashamed at herself at this reoccurring dream.

They had broken up for Christmas three days ago and from the first night she arrived home she was having dreams about her and Mildred, in some form or the other, she did not understand it, she had never had erotic dreams before, even when she was crushed up on Zack but she would never tell a soul about it because it was way too embarrassing to admit. She jumped out of her bed and went to the bathroom to shower, knowing the water always helped in her situation.

"Stupid Mildred, stupid plaits, stupid hair, stupid face, stupid smile," Ethel said letting the water fall on her as she tried to convince herself the girl was stupid even if she seemed to not get her off her mind, she mentally slapped herself then as she was thinking about her again and closed her eyes, willing herself to stop. She hated her she hated her she hated her, she needed to remember that.

Once she was out the shower she opened her bathroom cabinet and removed the small blade she had in there, each girl had an en suite so hiding it was easy. She took the blade and put it to her stomach causing an angry red slash to add to the growing collection she had.

She had been doing this way longer than she had been thinking about Mildred but she was clever and chose a place no-one would see, she knew no one liked her, she hurt people and she felt she only deserved pain because that is what she caused everyone in her life, she watched the blood flow, feeling like some of the poisonous blood in her veins was leaving her body, but today she made a second cut, this one as punishment for feeling this way and allowing herself to think about such things, it was disgusting and wrong and she had to stop herself.

Ethel was just putting her bow in her hair when she heard Sybil running down the corridor and then her door flew open as the younger blonde entered.

"Merry Christmas Ethie," the girl said. Ethel forced herself to smile and told herself to enjoy the day, it was after all Christmas, Esmie entered then in a Christmas hat and gave one each to her sister, Ethel moaned as she had to take her ponytail out, but Esmie glared at her so she proceeded to do that.

They went downstairs in quiet, as their parents were working and went and sat under the tree to start opening presents, Sybil kissed Ethel's cheek when she opened her Woody doll.

"He even talks," Sybil said pulling the string happily "We can watch the DVDs later," Sybil said happily.

Esmie, being emotional when it came to her sisters, burst into tears at the photo frames she received from Ethel and the canvas from Sybil and grabbed them both kissing them.

Sybil loved her cat light, Ethel was so happy with her riding gloves and her diary and everyone was so happy and grateful with their presents. Sybil then opened her presents from her friends, a potion-making kit from Clarice to help her learn potions in her own time and a framed photo of the three of them from Beatrice lastly was the present from Mildred.

Ethel opened the gift and gasped. It was a beautiful handmade craft book decorated with drawings and stickers and glitter, she turned the pages looking at the pictures of her and her sisters before she looked at the note.

"So you never feel alone and you know that you are loved, Mildred x" Ethel smiled at the gift touched in all honesty, it was so personal and thoughtful.

The rest of the evening the sisters watched DVDs, sang and danced in a silly way and enjoyed their new gifts, it was a really fun day despite the loneliness they felt at being alone at Christmas.

"Merry Christmas girls," Esmerelda said hugging her sisters tightly.

Ethel went to bed that night happy, she smiled as she fell asleep but that didn't mean she didn't dream about the girl in plaits again.