Skaifaya

by Cairlinn1991

What if Charlotte was not the only or even the youngest child on the dropship? This is the story of nine-year-old Marie Matthews, who is sent down to earth as a member of the 100. When Murphy is exiled from the 100 Marie follows him and they run into grounders. Separated from the 100 and to become Anya's second how will Marie stay alive and find a new life for herself?

20. Chapter 20 (191 - 200)

Chapter 201

Anya's gaze kept on turning towards Ontari and Marie. She had left both girls on the edge of the training field with the explicit order to watch the ongoing sparring matches. While Ontari's dark eyes stayed hefted on the ring of fighters, engaged in their training, Marie's attention switched quickly.

Anya had heard the blonde girl start to chat with Ontari as soon as she had turned her back to them and addressed the warriors of her unit.

Her unit now consisted of twenty-eight warriors, mixed from most of the different clans of the coalition, beside Skykru and Ice Nation that was. One woman and two men from the Plain Riders, three women and one man from the Glowing Forest, a pair of female twins from the Broadleaf Clan, one man from the Shallow Valley Clan, two men from the Rock Line Clan, two women and one man from the Blue Cliff Clan, two men and a woman from the Desert Clan, two men from Delphi, three men from the Lake People, two men and four women from Trikru. Anya had known the members from Trikru before, two came from TonDC and she had already fought with them. Anya had expected that the different origin of the warriors would make it less likely for them to truly fight together as a unit, but she was positively surprised by their progress.

She was engaged herself in a sparring match with the twins from the Broadleaf Clan. Both of them were shorter in their stature, but slightly burlier. They had a unique way of fighting and fought best if they had each other's backs. Anya had never before been faced with a pair of opponents being so in sync with each other.

She could feel sweat already running down the sides of her face and slicking her shirt to her body beneath the armour, but Anya had no intention of stopping.

From the corner of her eyes, Anya still kept watch over Ontari and Marie. The nightblood still obediently watched the matches with intent eyes, but Marie seemed to have lost focus completely.

Ontari rolled her eyes at the younger girl. The order to watch the sparring matches had been simple and although she had to agree internally that simply watching was not the most interesting, she would still heed the general's orders.

"You did what?" she asked, voice tinted with disbelief. Ontari had only loosely listened to Marie's words and she was not sure that she had got the child's last words correctly.

Marie paused, her eyes only focused on Ontari now. "Are you even listening?" she asked with a raised brow.

Ontari huffed and rolled her eyes at the younger girl "We are supposed to watch, not talk" she retorted stiffly.

Marie sighed and shook her head "Fine" she said and closed her mouth. Her gaze turned back to the cycle of fighters. She wanted to participate and not simply watch, watching was boring. She tapped her foot in boredom, fiddling around with a few small pebbles lying around her feet.

"Can you stop that?" Ontari asked after a moment, the girl's fiddling was distracting her attention and she was getting annoyed.

Marie narrowed her eyes at the nightblood, huffing in annoyance and hugging her knees to her chest, a pout forming on her lips.

"Fine" Ontari said after a moment, when it looked like Marie would likely explode with agitation in the next moments "Tell me what you wanted" she appeased the girl.

Ontari rolled her eyes when Marie kept silent and just looked in the other direction. But two could play this game and she knew that Marie had way less patience than she had, so Ontari leaned back slightly and turned her attention back to the warriors. She had to admit that the two women from the Broadleaf Clan truly knew how to fight, the general had to work hard to keep her guard up against them.

A slight smirk tugged at Ontari's lips when Marie began talking again only short moments later, but it froze completely, when her mind caught what the blonde had just said. She blinked at the younger girl, unable to process Marie's words.

"Can you repeat that?" she asked, voice chocked slightly and dark eyes widened in disbelief.

Marie rolled her eyes and she seemed to speak slower for Ontari's sake "I had asked Lexa to show me what it would feel like if I share myself with someone willingly" she said, voice low, probably aware that no one else was supposed to hear such talk.

Ontari's brows creased together. The images such a request called forth in her mind, let her stomach clench and she quickly shook her head, trying to clear such thoughts forcefully from her mind.

"She declined" Marie added when she noticed the horror flashing over Ontari's features. She did not know if she should feel affronted on Lexa's behalf because the nightblood seemed to think her capable of something like that. Marie had known that asking her had been wrong, the very moment the words had left her mouth. But she still was convinced that she would feel better if she had better memories to replace the ones the queen had edged onto her soul forever.

She could understand that Lexa had declined though. The woman was with Clarke now and it would have probably been absolutely awkward, she regarded her as a sort of mother after all.

Her grey eyes flicked to Ontari again. The girl was much closer to her in age than Lexa was and she trusted her.

"But you could" she said, following the thoughts rushing through her mind.

Ontari gasped, eyes widening even more and turning her attention completely to Marie now. "You want me to sleep with you?" she asked, a slight shriek turning her tone higher.

"Why not?" Marie retorted easily. When Ontari's features remained filled with disbelief, Marie began to reason with her "I trust you and I like you, so why not you?"

"Why not?" Ontari echoed incredulously. She found it hard to think straight right now. Internally she was wondering if Marie was mocking her, but her grey eyes seemed too honest for that and such a jab would truly be out of character for the girl. She was torn between standing and leaving the girl, to get the opportunity to think without her grey eyes looking at her like that and snapping at the blonde to cease this nonsense.

"I want better memories…" Marie added, voice low and laced with sadness now, her shoulders sagged. She had stopped to look at Ontari and was fiddling with a strap on her coat.

Ontari felt a deep flash of sympathy for the younger girl and her mind calmed slightly, reassured now that the girl was not trying to mock her somehow with her absurd plea. She watched the younger girl in silence for a few moments, a lump formed in her throat and she swallowed heavily past it. "I can understand that" she assured Marie in a soft tone "But this is not the way to go about it, Marie. You should heal and grow before you seek out someone again".

Marie huffed, her grey eyes suspiciously shining wet, but she nodded "Lexa reasoned something similar" she told the nightblood in a resigned tone.

"It has to be true if the commander said so" Ontari said, the hint of a tease colouring her tone, trying to lighten the younger girl's mood.

She was rewarded with a watery giggle and Marie nodded again, straightening herself and the girl gulped when her eyes fell on Anya again, only a moment later.

The general was on her way towards them and judging from her facial expression, the woman was less than pleased about her lack of attention to the training.

"Sorry" Marie immediately muttered ruefully, eyes cast to the ground, when Anya stood in front of them.

The general was visibly dishevelled, hair out of order, a graze above her eyebrow. Sweat and dirt had intermingled on her skin, giving her a grimy complexion. Her brown eyes were narrowed at both of the girls, but focused more on Marie.

"Talia!" she suddenly exclaimed loudly without turning back and Marie gave a slight startled jump at the general's raised voice.

Ontari met the general's angry gaze unfazed, she was assured now that the woman truly would not resort to any kind of physical punishment, so she doubted that they had anything to fear.

Marie's eyes showed her nervousness and the girl seemed to have shrunk down in size slightly under Anya's scrutinizing glare.

"Yes, general?" a female warrior had stepped closer to them at Anya's call.

Ontari inspected the woman. The tattoos adoring the left side of her face easily identified her as Trikru. She had light brown hair, which was braided in a lot of thin braids falling down to the middle of her back, while the sides of her head had been shaved clean as well and the tattoos continued there. Her eyes had a similar brown tone to Anya's and she hovered behind the general obediently.

"Teach them the language of the scouts" Anya ordered in a sharp tone. Talia had been a well-known scout before being abducted and brought into the Mountain. Marie's education in that regard had not continued even once since Sierra's death and if the girl was not interested in watching the sparring matches, she would learn theory instead.

Talia nodded immediately in acknowledgment, while Ontari frowned, not entirely sure what the general had meant. She was not aware that they spoke an additional language among the scouts.

"I expect you to be pay more attention now" the general chided Marie in a sharp tone, brown eyes disappointed.

Marie visibly winced at the reprimand and nodded her head meekly. Noting the disappointment and anger in her mentor's face had been worse than a physical slap and stung just as much if not more. She wished to follow the general and apologize to her, but the woman had already turned around and strode back towards the other warriors with quick strides.

Ontari put a hand on the younger girl's thigh, keeping her from standing up as well and lightly shook her head at the child.

"How much do you know already?" Talia asked, her brown eyes switching between both of them.

"Sierra taught me a bit" Marie answered truthfully, but she doubted that she still recognized a lot and they had not even gotten to the stage where she should have attempted to emit the various bird calls.

"Nothing" Ontari admitted with a frown. She did not truly see the sense in having to learn this, but who knew if it could come in handy someday. She was not aware that the scouts in Azgeda used any special communication system at all.

Talia nodded in acknowledgement "Tell me what you do remember" she requested from Marie, as she sat down cross-legged opposite of them.

Marie grimaced slightly before a look of concentration settled on her features and she searched through her memories frantically, trying to remember as much of the few lessons she had had with Sierra as possible.

Talia did not seem too impressed with the child's knowledge and she sighed under her breath "We will start from the scratch then…" she said and immediately launched into an explanation of the basics.

Ontari felt her head swim with all this new information soon after and she was almost glad, when Anya returned to them some time later and called off the lesson for today. She had to admit that the communication system seemed rather genius, there were so many birds living in the trees surrounding Trikru that it would hardly be noticed if there were a few extra bird calls. She had already known how well versed the Trikru general was in suddenly vanishing between the trees and Ontari could only assume that most Trikru warriors would have mastered this skill, taken together with an additional communication system, it gave the warriors a very clear advantage in the woods. It was no wonder that she could not remember if Azgeda scouts used something similar, there simply was not enough wild life to allow something similar.

Talia bid them goodbye with a mute nod, agreeing with the general to continue teaching her charges daily for as long as they deemed it necessary.

Marie still seemed rather subdued as Anya led them back towards the tower, but the girl's sullen mood was forgotten when they encountered some of the warriors who had been sent after the rest of the conclave on their way.

The girl's grey eyes flitted over the warriors, searching for another nightblood and she gasped audibly when she spotted Nymo on one of the horses in front of a warrior. The boy seemed barely conscious and was hanging limply in the man's arms. Marie was unable to spot any wounds as the warrior had wound his own cloak around the nightblood, obscuring him from view mostly.

While Marie's attention was now completely fixed on Nymo, Anya had noticed something which the girl had not. Two other warriors were not alone on their horses either, but it looked as if they were transporting weirdly shaped packages, hidden beneath thick furs.

The general sighed deeply, she knew what this meant. The warriors would probably not have brought back some of their companions, but rather had found two nightbloods already perished. The nightblood was considered sacred, so they would be given special funeral rites.

She ushered both girls towards the tower even quicker and hoped that Marie would not come to the same conclusion before they had reached the tower. Marie had been on friendly terms with all of the nightbloods except Kato and Anya had no idea how the child would react to see that two of them had died. It would be a rather heavy blow to Lexa as well and the general dearly hoped that the rest of the conclave would return unharmed soon.

"Who has travelled with him?" Anya directed her question in a hushed tone at Ontari, too low for Marie to catch the words.

Ontari's expression was rather hard to read but the general was relatively sure that the Ice Nation nightblood had already noticed what must have happened. "Saria and Gally had been paired with him" Ontari answered the general's question and her dark eyes flitted to the weird bundle of furs minutely, assured by the general's question that her instinctual assumption had been correct. It did not look as if Nymo was of good health either, so the next days would probably show if he perished as well.

Ontari frowned slightly, furrowing her brows. She had been convinced that she would feel relieved if the number of the nightbloods who would compete against her in the next conclave decreased, but the relieve was missing for some unknown reason from her mind.

Marie's grey eyes still rested on Nymo and the worry was palpable in them.

Anya only hoped that the girl would not get the idea to try and heal the nightblood boy. She moved slightly closer to the child, ready to halt her movements physically if she suddenly decided to step even closer to the boy.

"The healers will take care of him" Anya addressed Marie intently, trying to get the girl's focus back on herself and nudging her towards the entrance of the tower. A pair of healers was already waiting there and Anya knew that they should better go to the throne room. Lexa would surely call a halt to whatever meeting was ongoing currently when she heard the news.

Marie and Ontari were both silent during the ride with the elevator and Anya had to fight the urge to tap her foot impatiently at its slow pace.

As the general had expected, a meeting between the commander and the ambassadors was still ongoing, but she sent one of the warriors guarding the entrance to the throne room to Lexa with the message that something had come up which called for her attention immediately.

The young man visibly frowned, but went into the throne room without any protests. It did not take longer than a moment for the first ambassadors to file out of the room and Anya pulled Marie out of the way slightly.

The girl frowned up at her in obvious confusion, not understanding what was going on at all.

The guard motioned them inside only shortly after and they found Lexa sitting on her throne still.

The commander's green eyes were visibly worried and seemed to scan over Marie first, assessing her mood, clearly thinking that something must have happened to their young charge. Her gaze turned to Anya expectantly a moment later when she could not find something amiss with Marie.

"Some of the warriors you have sent behind the conclave as reinforcement have returned" Anya proclaimed in a grave tone.

Lexa's eyes widened a fraction, Anya's whole posture was enough for her to know that whatever the warriors had found was not good.

"The healers take care of Nymo, as we speak" Anya added after a short pause.

Lexa inclined her head in acknowledgement, her brows creased. She had discussed with Titus who should be paired together, so she was well aware that Saria and Gally had been supposed to be together with the boy. This knowledge ultimately led her to the question if the three nightblood children had separated or if the other two had been brought back deceased to Polis. She sighed under her breath, sorrow consumed her mind. She had feared exactly this kind of outcome since Aden and Ontari had been brought back and confirmed that there had been many more bandits in the woods than they had assumed.

"Do you know how severely Nymo is wounded?" she asked, voice noticeably heavy.

Anya shook her head in the negative, she was sure that it would not take long until a healer would come to make their report. She was also fairly certain that a flamekeeper would seek out the commander soon enough to tell her which nightbloods had died.

Marie's grey eyes were clouded as she looked between Anya and Lexa and the girl started to inquire "Should I try to…"

The girl was stopped before she could utter her whole suggestion though, Anya interrupting her in a sharp tone "No, Marie!"

Marie looked up at the general with a troubled expression, clearly not convinced. She wanted to say more and explain herself, but Lexa also rebuffed her quiet strongly.

Ontari watched the exchange with a frown, confused why both women were so sharp with the blonde girl at the moment which was highly uncharacteristic for them when it came to Marie. She did not understand what Marie might have wanted to ask, she would remember to ask the younger girl later what all this had been about.

It truly took only a few moments for a flamekeeper to knock at the door and rush inside to report. The flamekeeper was a young man from Trikru and his expression was grave.

"Heda" he addressed the commander with a solemn nod "I do not bring good news".

Lexa inclined her head, motioning him to continue. News did not get better, simply because you kept silent and she knew what to expect after all.

"Two nightbloods have been brought back to Polis already dead" the man reported gravely "Saria from Delfikru and Gally from the Rock Line Clan. Nymo has been brought back as well, but he lives still. His injuries are severe, the healers are still tenting to him".

Lexa nodded again, not saying a word. Her gaze rested on Marie, who truly looked shell shocked by the news, while Anya and Ontari both looked unfazed. She dismissed the flamekeeper immediately after, telling him to prepare the funeral rites for both nightbloods.

Marie surprised all three of them slightly, by mutely stepping directly in front of the throne and simply hugging the commander, saying that she was sorry to the woman.

Lexa enveloped the girl in her own arms, not sure who this hug was supposed to ground more out of the two of them. They now had already lost two nightbloods, while one was still fighting for his life and the whereabouts of Titus and the other three children was still unknown.

A very big thank you to all of those who have let me know that you are still enjoying the story =)

Previously in chapter 201

Anya is not satisfied with Marie's lacking attention. She ordered Talia to teach both of them the language of the scouts. Nymo is brought back injured to Polis, while Saria and Gally have died.

Chapter 202

The mood in the commander's quarters was rather sullen.

Clarke had come back to the tower early and had rushed to Lexa's side after she had heard what had happened. She had wanted to console Lexa, but the commander had not wished to be consoled at the moment.

Lexa had sat down on the floor in front of her bed, cross-legged and immediately began mediating. While Clarke had followed the brunette and watched her antics with a frown. When she had stepped closer to Lexa and crouched down next to her, the commander's green eyes had snapped open only for a moment and her pleaded "don't" had been clipped and Clarke had backed off again.

Marie had sat down on one of the couches facing the fire pit immediately, staring into the dancing flames moodily. She wanted to go and look where Nymo was and see if she could heal him. She liked the boy and she did not wish for him to die. Marie was totally frustrated that Anya had not even let her voice her suggestion. She was aware that chances were high that she could in fact not heal her friend, but she would not know if she did not try it first.

She glanced up shortly and spotted Ontari hovering behind the couches indecisively. Clarke and Anya stood a few feet away and were lowly speaking to each other, too low for Marie to understand a word.

Anya was keenly aware of the sweat and dirt still clinging to her skin and how utterly uncomfortable Ontari seemed to be. She proclaimed that she would return to their shared quarters and Ontari turned to follow her with an almost relieved expression. She was not truly surprised when Marie asked to remain behind. Anya inclined her head in agreement but a slight warning glittered in her eyes "You will come straight back to our quarters later, no detours!"

Marie nodded easily, resisting the urge to roll her eyes at the woman. She looked over to Lexa, but the commander's eyes were still closed and she huffed in annoyance.

"What is it?" Clarke addressed the girl, wandering over to her and sitting down on an armchair standing next to the couch.

Marie's grey eyes clearly showed her frustration "I could heal Nymo" she vented, crossing her arms over her chest.

Clarke frowned, she still vividly remembered how Marie had lain in one of the beds in the med bay in the Ark, unconscious and on the verge of death. She had later learned that the girl had probably suffered from this weird aneurysm because she had tried too hard to heal her. She also knew how hesitant Lexa still was about outing their relationship to the clans and she could only hypothesize what dangers Marie would await if her power became public knowledge. Although she was a healer at heart, who rejoiced at the opportunity to safe lives, Clarke had to agree with Lexa and Anya that Marie's talent was not predictable enough to be brought into the open. Both women regarded the girl as a daughter and a mother would never agree to bring her child into such open dangers.

"You might" she agreed cautiously "But there is no way of knowing for certain. Lexa and Anya want to know you protected…"

"I know" Marie interrupted her, voice rising slightly with her frustration "But I cannot just let him die! I could heal Ontari and Aden as well". Marie's grey eyes glittered angrily and her gaze bore into Clarke's.

Clarke looked at the young girl with creased brows, she was caught off guard by Marie's determination and she searched for words on how to calm her down again.

"You shall not" Lexa interjected in a sharp tone, standing up from the floor in one fluid graceful motion. Her green eyes were as hard as her tone and she stared the girl down relentlessly.

Marie met the commander's hard stare for long moments, until she sighed dejectedly and lowered her eyes back to the flames. "I just want to help…" Marie said, voice low and noticeably quivering, eyes still focused into the flames in front of her.

Lexa's features softened a fraction as she stepped closer to Marie and she put a reassuring hand onto her shoulder, giving it a light squeeze "I know, Marie, but it would not help if we have to increase security tenfold around you".

Marie looked up with a pout on her lips and she nodded with a crestfallen expression. "Should Ontari not at least know of it?" she questioned cautiously "We share quarters after all…"

Lexa shook her head in the negative, her expression steadfast "No one is to know, too many already do" she stared into Marie's eyes for a moment, waiting for the girl to incline her head in acknowledgment. "You have not told Ontari anything yet?" she asked, eyes boring down on the child, daring her to lie to her face.

Marie shook her head "No, I have not" she answered truthfully.

Lexa nodded, not having detected any lies in the child's eyes. She sat down next to Clarke, putting a hand on one of her knees and smiling tiredly at her.

"Where do you go when you mediate?" Clarke asked, feeling the silence settle between them heavily.

Lexa frowned "I do not go anywhere" she answered, bewilderment flashing over her features.

Clarke chuckled slightly, shaking her head at the sometimes-clueless woman. She explained the phrase to the commander and watched realization pass over her expression.

"I communicate with the past commanders" Lexa now answered the original question.

Marie slightly turned away from the fire "How does that work?" she asked, interest sparked. She had not truly made much progress in reading the first commander's journal yet, so she still had no idea how something like that could be possible.

Clarke seemed to have the same question and disbelieve was easy to spot in her blue eyes.

"I have been able to speak with the past commanders since the day of my ascension" Lexa explained a little "It took some time to get used to. But now I can speak to them in mediation, sometimes they speak to me in my sleep".

Marie and Clarke both seemed equally confused. But Marie accepted Lexa's words as a given easier, she had not come so much into contact with how technology worked, that she believed easier and her own talent had just appeared out of nowhere somehow as well.

A healer wanting to report on Nymo's condition interrupted their conversation. Apparently, the boy's injuries were severe and an infection seemed to settle in one of his hands.

Clarke offered to look at the boy as well, hoping that some of the medications from the Ark might be more potent and able to help the boy.

Marie wanted to accompany her, but Lexa physically grasped onto one of her wrists and shook her head, holding the child back until Clarke had left them.

Lexa had not missed the glint flashing through Marie's eyes and knew that the girl would attempt to heal Nymo if she came into touching distance, no matter what she would say now.

Marie scowled at Lexa, her eyes narrowed at the commander's hand which still held on to her wrist.

Lexa's eyes contained a silent warning and Marie seemed to deflate instantly, sitting down next to the woman with a pout on her lips.

"I know that you wish to help" Lexa acknowledged the girl's obvious urge "But this is not the way, exposing your talent and by thus putting yourself into danger will not help in the long run". Her tone carried a note of strictness but her eyes were compassionate.

Marie nodded begrudgingly, the conflict remained in her gaze though and Lexa hoped that the girl would accept her words with time.

The girl leaned over against the commander's frame and Lexa put her arm around Marie's body, pulling the child closer against herself.

"Do you think the others are fine?" Marie asked after long moments, breaking the silence that had settled between them.

Lexa's lips formed a thin line, before she answered in a grave tone "I do not know, Marie, but the fact that the scouts have not found any trace of them yet, is not good".

Marie sighed, her brows creased together. "What happens if they are all dead?" the girl inquired in a low tone.

Lexa swallowed heavily. Her mind had already started to accept that the other three nightbloods would probably not return alive to the capitol. "Their bodies will be brought back to the capitol, if they can be located and they will be subjected to the funeral rites" she answered the question honestly. Nothing else would happen, life would continue as it always did. But she would need to send out more flamekeeper scouts to search through the clans for nightblood children. She had hoped to be able to at least modify the rules of the conclave in such a way that she could raise the age restriction. Lexa had wanted to proclaim a decree that no nightblood beneath ten summers would be able to compete in the conclave, but that would now only leave Ontari and Aden as possible candidates and the flamekeeper and the ambassadors would never accept such a decree now.

Marie hummed in acknowledgment. Her gaze was still focused on the flames and she could feel her mind getting slower, as she grew tired. She lightly shook her head, trying to shake it off.

Lexa felt the girl start to fidget and she tightened her arms around her "Rest" she told her charge under her breath and lowly began to hum the melody of the old lullaby to Marie, soothing the girl to sleep in only a few moments.

Lexa sighed, as she felt Marie body go limp in her embrace, carefully she eased the girl to lie on her side, pillowing her head on her own thigh. Gently she began to take out the girl's braids, combing out her blonde hair with her fingers.

The changed conditions would make it impossible for Aden to accompany the army into the land of Azgeda. It would be irresponsible to allow the nightblood to leave the safety of the capitol if it was not absolutely necessary. Ontari on the other hand could still have valuable knowledge on the landscape they would travel. Taking the Ice Nation nightblood with them would still be risky, but Lexa knew already that Anya had planned to take the girl along. Ontari was certainly old enough and already had some experience. Marie also was deeply connected to the nightblood girl and the girl needed all the support that she could get right now.

Clarke stormed back into the commander's quarters some time later, black blood clinging to her hands and an angry scowl etched into her features. A healer was following her quickly, still arguing about something.

"Tell me that you did not give this order!" Clarke all but thundered, eyes glittering dangerously.

Marie startled awake with a shriek tumbling from her lips, grey eyes widened and wild with fright.

Lexa quickly put her hands on the child's shoulders, trying to calm her down before she could fall into a panic attack. Her lips thinned slightly and she raised a brow at Clarke "I do not know which order you speak of" she answered, trying to keep her tone calm, it got sharper slightly as she glared at the healer "Leave us!" she commanded sharply. Normally no one was granted entry into her quarters who had not been summoned or already had been heard by Titus.

The healer nodded frantically, turned on his heels and left the rooms without another word. He must have been aware that his mere presence in the commander's quarters without having been asked for, was overstepping his place.

"I mean the order that the boy's hand has to be saved at all costs" Clarke snarled, before the door could fall shut behind the healer "Even if it may cost him his life! You cannot be serious with this?!"

Lexa sighed, but she steeled herself, pulling up her façade again, looking back calmly at Clarke, unfazed by her boiling anger. "A nightblood with only one arm cannot fight sufficiently" she told the blonde woman simply as she stood from the couch to face off Clarke. She clasped her hands behind her back and stood facing the enraged healer with a calm façade.

"The boy will die!" Clarke shouted back, eyes narrowed in disbelief "Taking off his hand now, might save him".

Lexa shook her head with a determined expression "Treat Nymo to the best of your abilities, but save his hand".

"You are condemning him to death!" Clarke said through clenched teeth. Blue eyes hard and her lips thinned, disbelief was evident on her features "An amputation can save his life!"

"It might save his life now" Lexa retorted calmly "But it will condemn him to death later". She knew that a nightblood who was physically impaired would never be able to hold himself in the conclave.

"You mean the damn conclave" Clarke hissed in anger, but desperation clouded her blue eyes "I can save him, Lexa, I can save his life. He can live with one hand".

Lexa shook her head again, expression stony and hard "My order stands. Try what you can with your medicines from the Ark, but you will not take off Nymo's hand". Steel had infused her tone, the tone she used to subdue quarrelling ambassadors with.

The defeat flashing through Clarke's eyes was replaced with incensed stubbornness only the fraction of a second later. "Fine!" she hissed "Do not expect me back tonight!" she added fierily, voice shaking from anger.

Lexa looked behind the blonde woman storming off with a sigh. She could understand her reasoning to a certain degree, but she could not stop the small sliver of irritation brewing in her mind. Although Clarke had truly begun to adapt to their culture, this conflict showed just how far she still to go to truly accept this world now surrounding her.

Sorrow threatened to cloud her mind, but Lexa pushed it to the far corner of her mind forcefully. Marie was looking up at her meekly, grey eyes slightly widened. The girl had obviously been startled by the whole exchange, but Lexa did not only see slight fright in her features. She could almost easily read the gears turning in the girl's mind, probably thinking through again if she should not attempt to heal Nymo. Lexa knew that Marie had been particularly close to the boy, but it would not change her decision in the slightest.

She entertained the thought in her head to take Marie to Nymo and let the girl have her shot at healing him. But there was no way of telling if she would succeed. Even if the child was able to heal her friend, which was not guaranteed, how could they explain his miracle healing? By a blessing of the flame? But the boy was not commander, people would be more inclined to believe such a story then. She still vividly the effects on Marie after she had failed to heal Clarke and she could see the girl lying on the bed again, connected to tubes, as Abby told them that she was basically dead and she felt her chest tighten painfully at the memory.

Lexa shook her head, clearing her mind of her thoughts, feeling assured in her decision. As cruel as it may seem, if she had to choose between saving Nymo and protecting Marie, she would now choose the young girl without any sense of doubt and she was fairly certain that Anya would agree with her wholeheartedly.

"You will not let me try to heal Nymo" the girl said, shoulders hunched slightly and her brow furrowed. Her words had not been voiced as a plea or even a question, but rather a resigned statement.

Lexa's lips thinned slightly in regret, as she shook her head in the negative "I cannot" she agreed with her charge's previous words, voice heavy.

"Why not?" Marie asked, despite the fact that they had discussed it already.

Lexa crouched down slightly in front of Marie, bringing them onto the same level. She gazed deeply into her grey eyes, trying to focus on the love she felt for the young girl. "It is my obligation to keep you protected, Marie" she repeated her primary concern.

Marie frowned slightly and Lexa thought to detect a hint of accusation in her tone "But do you not have to protect the nightbloods more than me?"

The girl's words felt like a stinging slap and Lexa swallowed. There was no precedent for their situation in their history. Never before had a commander taken a second and found more a child of their own than a mere second in it or had a biological child. She had to trust her instincts now and immediately from witnessing the girl's talent for the first time, Lexa had known that it needed to be hidden from public knowledge. She knew that her mind was severely swayed by the love she held for the child, but she did not necessarily regard that as a negative point at the moment.

She followed her instincts now as well and spoke the words that she felt Marie probably needed to hear now. "I am pledged to protect my possible successors, yes, Marie. But your role is unprecedented as of yet" Lexa held Marie's gaze and kept her tone strong "There is more than one nightblood, but there could never be a replacement for you, my little star".

Marie's grey eyes swam in a sheen of unshed tears, obviously deeply touched by her words and she seemed to search for something in the commander's gaze, before she impulsively threw her arms around the commander's neck, pushing her cheek into the crook of her throat.

Lexa knew that her words had a certain harshness to them. But all of the nightbloods had been raised with the blunt knowledge that only one of them would rise to become the next commander. She had known this as a certainty for the duration of her tutelage as well.

Several quiet moments passed, before Marie slightly backed out of their embrace. Her grey eyes were stormy with too many emotions for Lexa to decipher all at once. The child's voice was low, almost too low to catch her words although they were not separated by much more than an inch. "Thank you" the girl whispered, awe riddling her tone.

"For what?" Lexa asked, not quite understanding to what Marie was referring. She would have expected gratitude from the girl if she had allowed her to try to heal Nymo, she had actually expected resistance from her now.

Hesitation flashed over Marie's features as the girl averted her eyes, looking down as if she found something very interesting on the commander's shirt all of a sudden.

Lexa had to strain her hearing hard to catch the girl's mumbled words.

"For choosing me first" Marie answered, voice dropping lower "For…for being my M… my…" she paused and looked up through her lashes, uncertainty written over her features "…my Mommy…". She looked down immediately again, obviously afraid to see rejection on the commander's face.

Lexa felt her breath being knocked from her body at the girl's words. Her heart seemed to stop for the beat of a second, before it began to beat fiercely. To Lexa it felt as if time had stopped suddenly and the moment stretched into eternity as she replayed the girl's words in her mind. She was speechless for long moments, feeling a burst of emotions thrum through her veins and she let her lips pull into a full-fledged smile. She knew without the sliver of a doubt that she would find it extremely difficult not to always put the girl – she mentally corrected herself – her daughter first from now on.

"I am honoured to be a mother to you" she assured her charge, her tone not as strong as she had wished, deeply touched to acknowledge this change in their dynamic. Despite her otherwise sullen mood, Lexa felt lighter somehow.

Chapter 203

Lexa was entirely content to simply hold Marie for as long as the child needed. Her thoughts were running wild in her mind. The position was less than comfortable, but she had had to hold out in worse positions during scouting missions with Anya in her past anyway.

The funeral rites for Saria and Gally would take place at sundown and she would be needed to lead them as the commander. While Anya and Marie would not necessarily be complied to be present, Ontari would be expected to attend as a fellow nightblood, but Lexa was positive that Marie would wish to attend anyway.

She still held on to a faint sliver of hope that Titus had been able to defend Thalu, June and Kato. But Lexa doubted that the chances for their survival were high, the reinforcement she had sent behind them should have been able to locate them quicker in that case.

She had already decided to make usage of the troops who had already gathered in and directly around the capitol. Tension were rising in their camps, as the troops were antsy to finally start their march into the North. They were waiting impatiently for the blood of Ice Nation. Leading them against the bandits and erasing them now, before they got too strong or garnered the support of one or more of the clans, would at least divert the troops attention from the stretching wait and give them a sensible goal. Lexa's mind would also rest easier when they finally would be able to march to the North, knowing that Polis was left behind without the continued threat of the bandits lurking in the woods. It was entirely possible that the bandits were only waiting for the coalition's bandied troops to leave Polis vastly unprotected. Taking over Polis and with it the capitol of the coalition would be much easier then.

It would also show if taking Marie with them into the North was truly a good idea. Lexa knew that trying to convince Anya to leave the girl behind would be nearly impossible. But internally, Lexa was fearing the inevitable confrontation between Marie and Nia. No matter how much their charge would improve in the time that was left, there was no way of predicting how Marie would react once she came face to face with Nia again. It was entirely possible, that the child's rationality would be turned off immediately. Nia had not just physically tortured the girl, but had corrupted her mind additionally. Lexa did not like the fact that she had to consider that there was a valid possibility of Marie suddenly even choosing to support Nia, if only out of pure trained fright, but it was still a likely outcome she would need to keep in mind. She hoped that the love Marie held for her and Anya would very well overrule whatever lasting impression Nia had left in her mind, but they would need to be aware of the possibility that it might just not be enough anyway.

Lexa had seen the effects of mental torture on warriors before. She had heard whispers of scouts from other clans, being broken completely in Nia's clutches, now functioning as deadly assassins for the Ice queen. She shuddered to imagine what scars might be left behind on Marie's gentle soul if Nia had managed to corrupt seasoned warriors.

When a knock resonated through her chambers, Lexa slightly backed away from Marie, only keeping her hands on the girl's shoulders.

"Come in" she called out loudly enough for the guards at her door to hear.

Gustus' head appeared in the slightly ajar door a moment later. His voice was calm and his expression did not reveal anything, but his dark eyes had a heavy compassionate shine to them "Commander, the flamekeepers have finished their preparations for the funeral rites" he proclaimed.

Lexa nodded, taking a deep breath and schooling her features again. She was not looking forward to the funeral rites, but they needed to happen as soon as possible.

"I will be there shortly" Lexa proclaimed, rising completely. She felt the muscles in her thigh tingle uncomfortably when her weight shifted. She needed to wash her face clean of the warpaint she was still wearing. Funeral rites were not the right occasion to wear it.

Gustus nodded and closed the door behind him. They could hear him speak to someone outside of the doors to the commander's quarters, probably telling the flamekeeper what the commander had just said. But his voice was too muffled by the closed door to catch the exact words.

"Go to Anya" Lexa ordered Marie in a calm tone "Tell her that the funeral rites will start soon".

Marie nodded with a troubled expression, standing from the couch as her whole posture screamed off the loss the conclave had already suffered.

"You do not have to attend" Lexa told her charge, green eyes softened noticeably.

As she had expected, Marie shook her head in the negative "I want to be there to honour their life" she reasoned in a subdued tone.

Lexa inclined her head in silent acceptance, giving the girl the hint of a smile as encouragement. "Death is a part of life, Marie" she lectured the girl in a firm tone.

Marie nodded "I know" she echoed her agreement. She would not have agreed months ago, but she did now. Death was inevitable to all of them, she only hoped that Lexa, Anya and Ontari would not fall anytime soon. She did not know if she would be able to cope with loosing either of them.

Marie left the room mutely, feet visibly dragging. She did not look at Gustus and the other guard standing beside the door, but she felt the weight of their gazes following her down the corridor nevertheless. She had gotten used to the continual presence of guards, handmaidens and all the other people working permanently all around the tower and they all knew who she was anyway.

She had stopped knocking at the door to the quarters she shared with Anya and Ontari, the general had reprimanded her often enough for the habit to finally drop it for good. She smiled slightly at Loras in silent greeting; the man was frequently enough on guard duty at their quarters that Marie had asked after his name some time ago and now easily recognized him.

The young man inclined his head with a friendly expression and immediately opened the door for the blonde girl.

Marie found Anya sitting at the table, a book in front of the general, the sites visibly weathered by age. Ontari was lying on her bed, back turned towards the general, but still dressed in the clothing she had worn before. The nightblood did not turn at her arrival, so Marie assumed her to be sleeping or at least dozing lightly.

The general had looked up at her entrance immediately and her brown eyes clearly showed the worry she obviously still felt for her.

"Lexa told me to inform you that the funeral rites will start soon" Marie relayed her message before Anya could speak. She breathed out a sigh. She knew that the grounders believed to set free the souls of the dead so that they could be reborn into another life and Marie dearly hoped that this believe was true.

Anya inclined her head, closing the book with a resonating snap. From the corner of her eyes she had noticed Ontari shift slightly, indicating that the girl was indeed not really sleeping. Ontari had not said a single word since they had returned to their quarters together. Anya had preferred to let the girl sort through whatever was running through her mind in silence, while she had bathed and dressed in clean clothes. She had wanted to speak to the nightblood girl after her bath, but Ontari had already been pretending to sleep then and Anya had chosen to simply go with her charade. If the girl did not wish to speak, she would not force her, she doubted good would come out of that anyway.

"You wish to attend" Anya assessed, no judgement in her tone, already aware of her young charge's decision. "Get up, Ontari" she addressed the nightblood girl, tone slightly louder and sharper "You do not have the luxury of deciding to attend or not" she informed the girl, when Ontari did not react at once.

When the girl still made no movement to get up, Anya stood from her chair quickly, letting it scrap over the floor loudly "Do not make me physically drag you there" she snapped at the girl. Surprised by the girl's sudden resistance against her command, the girl had not been rebellious in any way since she had officially taken her on as her second. In fact, the girl had behaved in an exemplary manner until now and Anya was wondering about what had prompted the change.

Ontari finally rose from the bed, expression hard and clearly intent on still resisting. "Why should I?" she asked in an uncharacteristic petulant tone, dark eyes glaring openly at the general.

Anya frowned at the girl, anger rising in her veins. The girl had had the perfect opportunity to discuss the matter with her long before and had chosen to stew in silence instead. They did not have time for this now.

"Marie, go ahead and tell Lexa that we will be there shortly" Anya addressed Marie. The blonde girl was visibly hesitant to follow her order, but a light glare sent the girl into action quickly enough and Anya waited until the door fell shut behind Marie, before she turned her full attention back to Ontari.

"You will honour the death of the nightbloods as you are obliged to by attending" Anya said in a hard tone, dark eyes taxing Ontari "It would be a severe insult not to" she added, her tone carrying a warning tone.

"It would not be in Azgeda" Ontari retorted, crossing her arms over her chest. Ice Nation did not share the custom of burning their dead. Only those having fallen under high grazes were bestowed this honour. Being robbed and killed by bandits did not qualify for an honoured death in her eyes. She did not know why she felt so upset at the prospect of having to see their bodies burn. She had seen her fair share of death already and she never been affected by it before. But Ontari knew that she did not wish to be there for their bodies to burn.

Anya snarled in impatience at the girl's attitude. She pinched the bridge of her nose "We do not have time to discuss about different views on funeral rites right now, Ontari!" Anya barked at the girl. She guessed that Lexa would not start with the rites until they attended and she could envision how the commander was feeling, she did not wish to keep her waiting unnecessarily.

Anya feared that she would truly have to physically drag the stubborn girl to attend the funeral rites, she could see that snapping at the girl was not changing her attitude one bit. She took a deep breath, trying to reign in her rising impatience, before she truly lost her patience with the girl. It would not help their still fragile bond one bit.

She took the time to actually take a closer look at the girl's expression. Ontari may have put up a rebellious front, but Anya thought to spot slight fear and definite reluctance in her dark eyes. She chided herself a fool in her mind. Of course, the situation would have been upsetting to the nightblood girl. She had assumed that Ontari was unaffected by the loss of the two nightbloods simply because she knew that the girl had not formed any personal ties to them, but clearly, she had been wrong. Anya was not sure if the girl was truly mourning for their death, but she somehow doubted that. Maybe their deaths had just driven home that the situation could have ended much differently. Anya knew that Ontari had been raised to think of herself as invincible, seeing physical proof of the fact, that she truly was not, would surely upset her.

Anya softened her expression noticeably and stepped closer to Ontari. She thought about offering a reassuring touch to her, but was uncertain of how the Ice Nation nightblood would conceive such a gesture, so she refrained. "You may not like to attend, Ontari" she acknowledged the girl's obvious reluctance in an understand tone "If you do not think of it as an honour to Saria and Gally, which no one can force you to, accept it as a necessity and if that is not enough, offer your support to Marie by being there". She had added the last part in the hopes of swaying the stubborn girl, when her expression had only changed slightly. To her internal relieve she could see most of the girl's reluctance melt from her features at the mention of Marie.

Ontari inclined her head in silent agreement. She knew that her denial to attend was irrational and she had already assumed that the conclave's attendance was mandatory. She had still hoped to be let off, but had known that the chances had only been minimal at best. She steeled herself, letting her expression go completely blank.

Anya nodded, breathing a sigh of relieve. She would need to impart into Ontari as soon as possible that she could not accept any disobedience in such important matters. She knew that she was treating both of her charges differently. She treated Marie way softer and was more inclined to let something slide with her. She should have expected for Ontari to test out her own limits sooner and she would need to somehow find a balance in how she treated both girls. She doubted that Ontari would expect her to be treated in exactly the same fashion as she fared with Marie, their bond was way not deep enough for that, but it would be unfair of her to keep treating Ontari so harshly. The girl had earned her trust after all.

"You are doing well" Anya awkwardly tried to acknowledge the girl's change of mind. She tried to supress the frown wanting to rise on her features. She still found it much weirder to deal with Ontari in even a slightly softer way, while she had no problems any longer to be soft for Marie. Maybe the Ice Nation nightblood would do well with at least a little bit of softness and acknowledgment as well.

Surprise flashed over Ontari's features, breaking her blank mask. The general had completely caught her off guard with her words. She did not know what she should say to the woman, so she only met her gaze mutely.

Anya motioned the nightblood to get moving after another short moment. They should get going anyway.

The way to the floor which housed the conclave passed in a heavy silence. Anya kept watch of Ontari from the corner of her eyes, but the girl wore a blank expression, standing tall and rigid in the elevator and staring at the wall without even blinking.

The room Anya led them too was already prepared. Lexa stood in front of two tables. The dead nightblood children had been covered with bright cloths, a black line had been drawn on the middle, usually done with the deceased blood. Flowers had been placed around them on the tables, together with a few candles.

The commander looked up at their entrance and nodded at the guards standing at the doors. The guards immediately closed the door behind them.

Anya was slightly surprised to see Clarke standing in the background, supporting Nymo in standing. The boy must have been coherent enough to insist on attending the funeral rites. Aden also stood in front of the tables, a slight grimace on his features as he was visibly favouring his uninjured leg. Marie stood beside the sandy-haired boy, but looked over her shoulder at Anya and Ontari when they entered.

Kyla, Ryno and Boo stood close to Aden, holding onto each other in silent support.

The girl's expression turned slightly pleading, when she looked at Ontari. Lexa had explained to her that usually only the commander, leading flamekeeper and the other nightbloods were present at these funeral rites. Anya would need to stay in the background, just like Clarke already did. Her own position as Lexa's second and having received at least parts of the education of a flamekeeper, allowed her to stand in front as well and Marie had been downtrodden when the commander had told her that she could not stand with her during the ceremony. She hoped that Ontari could come over to her instead.

The nightblood girl stepped over to Marie mutely, giving in to her silent plea willingly. Ontari had become practised enough at reading the blonde girl to understand her expression without any need for actual words.

Her dark eyes connected with Aden's blue ones shortly, inclining her head in silent greeting. The boy acknowledged her gesture in kind before his eyes returned to Lexa.

She had been slightly surprised that Anya had led them here and not outside as she had expected that the nightblood children would be burnt immediately, but apparently the customs in Polis were different.

Marie had no real inclination as to what exactly would transpire now as well, but she felt grateful to feel Ontari's presence beside her and she looked up at the dark-haired girl shortly, before Lexa cleared her throat, calling everyone's attention to herself.

Lexa swallowed down the lump lodged in her throat, but she let the grieve coursing through her veins show in her eyes. She held a short speech about Saria and Gally, praising their universal strengths. She pointed out what had apparently made them each so worthy of their nightblood and what their loss should mean to all of them.

Afterwards the flamekeeper, substituting for Titus, spoke a few words in addition. At last, asking all of them to honour the two fallen nightbloods by keeping them vigil for now.

The man retrieved a bowl with red colour from somewhere and drew the signs of the commander onto the cloths which were wrapped around Saria and Gally.

Marie had tears shining in her grey eyes, but she refused to let them fall. Her gaze was focused on the candles burning down on the tables. Once they would have burned down completely, the vigil would be finished and the nightbloods' corpses would be burnt to set their souls free. The colour which had been drawn by the flamekeeper painfully reminded her of the prank they had all played together on Titus and she swallowed down half of a sob, bubbling from her mouth unbidden.

Ontari silently wrapped an arm around the younger girl, pulling her into a one-armed hug, trying to console her without words. Although she was not familiar with these funeral rites, she knew that a vigil had to pass in silence. She heard some whispered words in the background and glanced over her shoulder. Anya and Clarke seemed to exchange something under their breath. She noticed how Nymo seemed to be swaying on his feet, sweat glistened on his face, he was obviously running a high fever, indicating a severe infection.

Lexa looked over to them as well, slight irritation at the interruption flashing over her features. But it was replaced with worry at the apparent worsened condition of Nymo. She did not interfere when Clarke and Anya together removed Nymo, who had put up a feeble attempt at resistance, from the room.

Ontari stopped Marie from going behind Anya and Clarke, by tightening her arm around the younger girl. She knew that leaving in the middle of a vigil would not be tolerated as well and the commander seemed irate enough already without her charge causing another scene additionally.

Chapter 204

Time seemed to slow down as they stood vigil in silence together.

Lexa had hoped that she would never again have to hold a funeral rite for one of the children she had pledged to teach and raise as candidates to succeed her. It pained her deeply to be forced to do so now. She had seen Nymo's condition and she could only pray that Clarke's medications from the Ark could save the boy or they would probably be repeating this in the coming days for him as well. Added to the fact that she was expecting for the three missing nightbloods to have already died as well, Lexa could only steel herself.

In her opinion, the children had never been supposed to die before her. The natural cycle would have been for the children to die in the next conclave and for one of them to take up her place. She should not have the obligation to free their spirits.

But she also knew that she was not the only one grieving for the two children. Especially the three youngest nightbloods seemed grief-stricken and their sobs were the only thing disturbing the otherwise silent room.

Lexa was slightly surprised that Marie was not crying with them, but she was internally grateful that Ontari was showing her support for the young girl.

She had pledged to protect the nightbloods, all of them, and she had obviously failed miserably at that. Lexa knew that she was not the only one to blame for their death, as they had sent enough warriors to protect them. But still, she had not been there to personally protect the children. She allowed herself to feel the guilt and weight of their deaths. She could not allow herself to be weighted down by the guilt clouding her mind later, but she could wallow in it as long as they stood vigil for them.

Knowing that Clarke was still angry at her, did not lighten Lexa's mood in the slightest. Outwardly, she had not reacted to Clarke glaring at her in silence, the long minutes they had waited for Anya and Ontari to arrive, but internally Lexa felt disheartened. She wished to reconcile with her love, needing her strength now, but she knew Clarke well enough to be aware that Clarke would not be appeased by anything beside her giving in and allowing her to amputate Nymo's hand.

It seemed, that the day held more bad news still. The candles had only burnt down halfway through, when the doors were pushed open loudly. Lexa's head span around, her eyes narrowed and nostrils flared in irritation at yet another interruption, but the angry retort died on her tongue.

Titus stood in the opened door and June followed on his heels.

Lexa quickly let her gaze travel over both of them. Her previous teacher looked exhausted, deep bags had formed under his eyes and there was more than one scrape visibly on his skin. A bandage peaked through under the flowing sleeves of his robes and he limped in addition.

"Heda" he inclined his head solemnly and Lexa could already read the deep sorrow in his dark eyes.

June was visibly injured, as well as obviously deeply exhausted as well. One of her arms was bandaged from the shoulder to her hand and a deep graze ran from her hairline down the left side of her face, disappearing under her dark hair.

"Thalu and Kato?" was all Lexa asked and she sighed deeply at the flamekeeper's expression.

"They are prepared as we speak" Titus retorted gravely, bloodshot eyes lowered to the floor in obvious shame. He had failed to protect his pupils and had watched them die, unable to save them.

The nightblood children, save Ontari, all visibly looked shocked at the information. Boo seemed to take it the hardest, his sobbing increasing in volume tenfold. The young red-haired boy had taken a great liking to Thalu in the last months and she had been his primary attachment figure.

Aden pulled the young boy into a hug, grimace deepening as he shifted his weight more on his injured leg, trying to console him somehow.

Marie looked between Lexa and Titus in obvious shock, before she turned slightly in Ontari's one-armed hug, wrapping her own arms around the girl's middle and pushing her face into her dark shirt.

Lexa inclined her head in acknowledgement, before she addressed the flamekeeper which had substituted Titus before. "Have them brought here as soon as possible" she harshly ordered. They could very well hold the funeral rites for all of them at once.

The bleak truth was that they had lost four nightbloods in the span of a few days with Nymo's fate still uncertain. Lexa did not think that so many of the nightblood children had ever died at once. It happened on occasion that one of them died in a training accident or something similar, but this was a new scale. She would definitely lead the army to erase the bandits as soon as possible, if only to avenge the children they had killed.

Ontari tightened her uninjured arm around Marie. Her thoughts circled on the information that Kato had apparently been killed as well and she could not help the small surge of relieve coursing through her veins. The boy would have undoubtedly continued to cause trouble for her and Marie and getting rid of him this way, was acceptable in her opinion.

Her dark eyes wandered over the nightbloods gathered in the room and a small frown appeared on her features. Ontari was aware that she was injured as well, but all of the others being old enough to compete in the conclave were as well. Would a conclave occur this very night, she was certain that Aden would lose, having difficulties to simply stand without the added strain of having to fight. June seemed to have a similar injury to herself, but Ontari knew that the girl was physically weaker than herself. Nymo would be too out of it to even attempt to protect himself, which would almost guarantee her success in a conclave.

For the briefest flash of a moment, Ontari envisioned killing Lexa single-handedly, sworn oath or not. No one would be able to stop her rise to become commander then. She could stop the war against Ice Nation. She was sure that it would lure Nia into the capitol under the assumption that she would still be loyal to her. How surprised the woman would be when she sliced her throat?

She was pulled out of her thoughts, when Marie shifted slightly, jostling her injured limp in the process and she hissed under her breath, wondering if some higher being was punishing her for even entertaining something like this in her mind.

Ontari banished her thoughts altogether forcefully from her mind. Marie's grey eyes looked at her with such trust, swimming in a sheen of unshed tears. She knew without the sliver of doubt that Marie would never forgive her, if she assassinated Lexa. In all honesty, she did not truly wish to kill her either. She had gotten to know too much of the woman the commander truly was, to be able to kill her without any kind of hesitation now.

June stepped closer to the other nightbloods and Kyla and Ryno latched onto her immediately. The girl comforted them to the best of her abilities. Grieve was etched deeply into her features as well. They had briefly seen Nymo being helped down the corridor, which told her that Gally and Saria were under those cloths.

Titus stepped closer to Lexa and both exchanged a few whispered words. Marie tried to strain her hearing, turning her head slightly and peering over, but they were speaking too low for her to understand.

Both fell silent, when the doors were pushed open again and two more tables were wheeled into the room, already prepared in the same fashion. Marie shuddered quiet strongly when she noticed that a leg seemed to be missing from Kato's body.

More candles were lighted, more heavy words were spoken and the vigil continued as the atmosphere turned oppressive with every passing second.

Marie had lost the battle against her tears and Ontari felt her shirt getting damp with her tears where she had pressed her face against it. But Ontari did not even think about pushing her away either.

Anya had returned to the room some time ago, expression clearly expressing her condolence. But the general stayed in the background, as her position required, content to physically see Maire and Ontari. She felt her mind projected back to Arkadia, where they had been sure to have to bring back her dead body to Polis and the small substitute funeral rite they had held for Marie and she dearly hoped that they would never have to truly see her body burn. She also hoped that she did not have to witness the same rite for Ontari. Watching Tris' body burn and mourn for her, had been a grave enough loss.

It seemed to take forever for the candles to finally burn out. While the vigil was private to the conclave, the commander and the leading flamekeeper, burning the bodies of fallen nightbloods was publicly held in front of the tower. The pyres would be being erected right at this moment.

Marie had lost all sense of time and seemed slightly startled when Ontari squeezed her shoulder to get her attention. She blinked at the older girl once and a frown settled on her features when she realized that the tables on which the nightbloods had lain had already been removed. How could she have missed that?

"It is time to go" Ontari told the blonde girl in a hushed tone.

Marie inclined her head mutely and she felt slightly dizzy as she backed off from Ontari completely. She swayed on her feet a little and was caught off guard by a pair of strong hands settling on her shoulders and stabilizing her. She twisted around to look over her shoulder and met Anya's worried gaze. "I am fine" she assured the general and Ontari likewise "Just a bit dizzy" she added.

Anya nodded, her eyes quickly scanning the girl over. She could not detect the signs of an infection in her young charge, she would still take a look at all her wounds before they turned in for the night, just to be sure. She still could hear Clarke's angry words about Lexa's decision to deny her to amputate Nymo's clearly infected hand ringing loudly in her ears. She had tried to reason with the blonde healer but Clarke had been so set in her mind that her words had been wasted on her. Anya knew that Lexa could not have come to another decision sensibly although she was sure that it would pain the young leader deeply, something Clarke stubbornly wanted to ignore.

She hoped that Marie was simply showing effects of exhaustion. They had not had the opportunity to eat dinner and the vigil had taken quiet some time already. Setting the spirits of the fallen nightbloods free would take them way into the middle of the night.

Marie shortly glanced at Lexa, but the commander was standing with her back towards them, obviously speaking lowly with Titus.

The three youngest nightblood children looked nearly asleep on their feet, but Marie doubted they would wish to go to bed yet, probably insisting to see the pyres burn.

When Lexa and Titus broke apart, they led the nightbloods out of the room in slow steps, probably considerate of Aden who seemed to have great difficulties with walking.

Marie was surprised to see so many people waiting for the small procession. The place in front of the tower was crowded with citizens of Polis and it looked like quite a number of the warriors wo had come here to march into the north, were also standing among them now.

Lexa's words carried easily over the whole crowd. She spoke in high terms of the fallen nightbloods and acknowledged the unity among the coalition, as well as proclaiming that the bandits who were responsible for this bloodshed would be annihilated by the army.

Her heart felt heavy as she was handed a torch and ignited one pyre after the other. The flames radiated heat quickly, but Lexa still felt a bone-deep coldness in her body. Her gaze travelled to Anya and Marie shortly. The general had her arms draped around the young girl, her coat enveloping them both, while Marie held onto her hands. The child must have sensed the weight of her gaze, as she looked up to her minutely. Their gazes locked for long moments and Marie smiled slightly at her, although her grey eyes were deeply laden with sadness. She would have liked nothing better than to step over to Marie and connect with her through at least a soft touch, but Lexa knew that she should not. So, she averted her eyes back to the flames consuming the bodies of the fallen nightbloods slowly.

Marie was glad when Anya signalled them it would be alright for them to return to the tower now, once the bodies had been consumed by the fire completely and Lexa had already turned around and heeded towards the tower. She just wanted to sleep and hopefully forget that this day had ever happened. She held on tightly to one of Anya's hand, reluctant to lose the contact completely and she was relieved that woman indulged her mutely, not even commenting at all.

Ontari had not said a single word since they had left the tower. Her thoughts were still circling around the fact that she had entertained the idea of taking out the commander to take her place. The only merit the plan would have had, would have been the easy possibility to take out Nia. But still, the whole idea had somehow shocked her, although Ontari could not put a finger onto the reason. She wanted to speak with someone about her thoughts. She doubted speaking with Marie, would have any good consequences as she did not wish to risk their friendship. She was unsure how the blonde girl would perceive something like that.

Ontari regarded the general out of the corner of her eyes when they stepped into the elevator. The woman still held one of Marie's hands as the girl now leaned against her taller frame. She seemed focused on Marie entirely. Their bond was not strong in any form yet and she knew how deeply the general still felt for her previous second. So, she ruled the Trikru woman out as a viable option as well. Her gaze finally turned to the commander, the woman's expression was mostly blank but her green eyes showed her sorrow. Something fell into place in her mind and Ontari was certain that she needed to directly speak with the commander in person.

Lexa left in the direction of her quarters alone, deeply lost in her thoughts and simply wishing to divest herself of the regalia of the commander, feeling it weighing her down now, more than ever.

Anya steered Marie directly into their quarters. The blonde girl trudged over to the general's bed in the process of lying down. Risha, who had made herself at home on it already, wagged her tail at her human in greeting.

"Hi girl" Marie greeted the wolf in a tired tone, loosening her coat and letting it fall to the floor, not particularly caring at all.

"Don't lie down" Anya addressed the girl sharply and motioned her towards the bathroom.

"I am fine" Marie insisted and her tone turned whiny "I just wanna sleep…"

"You can in a moment" Anya assured, levelling the girl with a slight glare, not particularly in the mood to deal with her talking back at the moment. She would insist on taking a look at Marie's wounds, infections needed to be treated as soon as possible and she would not take any chances with the girl's health.

Marie followed Anya's orders with an audible groan and a role of her eyes. "You can go to sleep" Anya told Ontari with a glance over her shoulder before her brown eyes narrowed down at Marie, having enough from her cheek for now.

Ontari hovered in the middle of the room uncertainly. Risha trotted over to her and she lightly let her fingers glide over the wolf's muzzle, grateful that the wolf was not licking at her fingers again. She had lost her fright of this particular wolf for good.

Coming to a decision, Ontari turned on her heels and silently left their quarters again. She wondered if the commander would even be willing to speak with her at this moment, but she hoped so.

The two guards standing post at the commander's quarters looked at her with judging gazes. She had come to know Gustus at least a little, but she was unfamiliar with this particular guards.

"Is the commander's second alright?" one of the men asked her after a moment of silence.

Ontari inclined her head in quick agreement "I want to speak to the comm…" she began to voice her reason for being there in the first place.

But the man interrupted her sharply "The commander will not see anyone now".

Ontari huffed in annoyance, but she nodded, feeling her shoulders sag in slight defeat.

"Let her pass" Lexa's muffled voice suddenly ended her retreat from behind the closed doors.

The guards opened the doors for her immediately and Ontari slipped inside, steps slightly hesitant. Although she wished to talk to the woman, she was unsure of the commander's reaction to her words. She was simply certain that she would not be able to rest peacefully if she did not speak with the commander now.

"What brings you here?" Lexa addressed her, standing in the middle of the room. She had just shrugged out of the regalia of the commander and was in the process of taking out her braids. She wondered why the nightblood girl was seeking her out. She had expected that something was up with Marie when she had identified Ontari's voice. Lexa felt tired and exhausted and wished to rest for what little time remained of the night, but whatever troubled the nightblood girl must be important to bring her to her quarters at all.

Ontari looked at the older woman for long silent moments, a conflict flashing through her dark eyes and Lexa patiently waited for her to sort through her thoughts.

The nightblood's voice was slightly subdued as she retold to the commander what thoughts she had allowed herself to entertain during the vigil.

Lexa furrowed her brow, scanning the girl for visible weapons quickly. Her tired mind tried frantically to identify why the girl was telling her this at all. It was obvious that it weighed heavily on the girl's mind. It took her quite some long moments to figure out what emotions flashed through the girl's dark eyes. The most prominent one was guilt.

Lexa regarded the girl in silence for another long moment, the way she squirmed under the weight of her gaze was uncharacteristic for the Ice Nation nightblood and backed up her assumption of the girl feeling guilty.

"And yet, you did not exploit my moment of weakness" she commented at last. Lexa's first instincts had been to reach out to the weapons, she had already discarded on the table in front of her, but she highly doubted it would be necessary. The girl had not come here to kill her.

Ontari's head snapped up again, as she had lowered her gaze before. She thought for a moment that the commander would execute her now and that she had severely misjudged how the Trikru woman would react. "No" she agreed, settling to stay absolutely honest now "And I will not ever" she promised.

Lexa regarded the girl for another long moment, before she nodded, a silent understanding passing between them. The girl had officially already pledged herself to Lexa as the commander, but Titus had warned her that such an oath could be twisted if needed. The girl's prime motivation to even swear the oath back then had surely be to save her own skin and to be close to Marie. But today the girl had chosen not to act on her chances out of her own will. Seeing how guilty the girl felt for even entertaining such thoughts and taking the courage to speak with her about them, showed clearly to Lexa that the girl's opinion of her had shifted dramatically and that was not only caused by Marie now. Lexa did not need to know what exactly had made Ontari shift her loyalties in such a way, but it was good to be assured of them like this.

She inclined her head in mute acknowledgment "I appreciate and will not forget your honesty, Ontari".

Chapter 205

Anya helped Marie in undressing so that it happened quicker. The girl's movements were slow, she was obviously truly exhausted.

A part of the wounds on Marie's collar bone seemed to have reopened and the bandage stuck to the skin slightly.

Marie winced and hissed as Anya tried to pry it from the girl's skin as gently as possible.

Anya looked at the girl apologetically and she swiftly applied some of the ointment Clarke had left behind to treat the girl's wounds. Fortunately, she could not find any wound which seemed infected. So, she assisted the girl to get into comfier clothes to sleep in, before she at last took a look at the girl's hand. She frowned slightly, the skin around the deep cut looked slightly red and she thought it felt warmer to the touch. She applied some of the ointment as well on the wound, keeping a tight hold on the girl's hand when she tried to retract it at the contact.

"It stings" Marie complained whiney, trying to pull her hand free again. Her grey eyes more alert again and looked at Anya accusingly.

"I know" Anya acknowledged and tried to keep patient with the girl "Keep still for a moment longer" she ordered strictly and applied a clean bandage to the girl's hand. She would have Clarke take a look at the wound on the next day as well.

"Do you think Nymo will survive?" Marie asked a moment later, voice subdued and expression crestfallen.

Anya remained on her knees in front of the girl "I do not know, Marie" she answered honestly. There was no way of telling if Clarke's medicines would be enough to battle the infection in his body. She had seen herself just how badly impaired the boy's health already was.

"Lexa said that she did not wish to risk me trying to heal him" Marie informed the woman in a sad tone. She had not truly expected a positive answer anyway.

Anya nodded in agreement, she had already anticipated that Marie would have asked Lexa to see Nymo. They both knew of the friendship between the two children, but she would not have said anything different to Marie than Lexa already had. She would protect Marie at all costs and Lexa must see that in a similar fashion.

Anya sent Marie ahead to bed, relieving herself quickly. She was surprised, when she stepped back into the main room of their quarters, to spot Marie standing in the opened door, speaking with one of the guards lowly.

The young girl frowned as she turned back to face the general "Ontari went to see Lexa" she informed her.

"Can't we go there?" she asked, eyes big and pleading "Only for tonight?" she added, her best attempt at an innocent look directed at Anya.

The general sighed under her breath. The day had been difficult and taxing for all of them and she felt her resolve break. "You shall ask Lexa" she agreed with another sigh.

Marie smiled immediately, feeling pretty certain that the commander would not let her down. She was curious why Ontari had sought out Lexa as well.

Anya knew that she would probably regret this decision tomorrow night. She already chastised herself a fool in her mind, but she had been unable to deny the girl like that. She had half expected another break down from the girl, anticipating how upsetting the situation must be to her, after seeing effect already in Ontari. Aside the fact that Marie immediately grasped hold of one of her hands again, the girl outwardly seemed to do well enough.

"Come on then, before I regain my common sense" Anya said to the girl, voice slightly sarcastic.

Marie frowned, trying to understand if Anya had meant that literately or not. Not wanting to take any chances, she slightly pulled at Anya's hand urging her to get moving. Risha jumped down from the general's bed as well, obviously intent on accompanying her human.

The guards opened the door to the commander's quarters for them without any questions asked. They knew that the general and the commander's second were free to enter at any time.

Lexa looked away from Ontari at their entrance, her brow furrowed in obvious confusion.

"I wanna stay tonight…" Marie proclaimed, tone slightly whiny again, as she gave Lexa another perfectly innocent look.

The slight irritation melted from Lexa's features instantly and she inclined her head without even hesitating for a second.

Anya rolled her eyes subtly at her former second, Marie sure as hell had the woman totally wrapped around her little finger, she doubted there would be anything in Lexa's might that she would deny the child if she asked. Clarke had told her already that she would not leave Nymo's bedside for the night, so she was not surprised at the healer's absence in the slightest.

Ontari shuffled her feet awkwardly, it did not look as if the general intended to return to their own quarters. "I shall go…" she said, but was interrupted by the commander.

"You may sleep on the couch if you please" Lexa offered. She knew that the situation was less than ideal, but Anya would probably not wish to force the nightblood girl to be on her own now. Ontari had proven to be trustworthy again tonight and she knew that she was acknowledging it as such by her offer.

Ontari contemplated the offer for a moment, before she inclined her head. It would probably be perceived as rude, if she declined any way. The situation was weird at best, but she would go with it for now.

"Thank you" Marie smiled brighter at Lexa, stepping closer to her and hugging the commander around the middle for a moment.

Lexa's lips tilted into a slight smile as well as she let her fingers comb through girl's blonde hair "Off to bed with you" she gave the girl a gentle nudge.

Anya had stepped closer to Ontari and mutely helped her unbuckle her coat and crouched down to unlace the girl's boots for her. Ontari looked at the general with a grateful expression, but stayed silent.

"Sleep" was the only thing Anya said, as she stood again and gave the nightblood girl a nod. She took of her own coat and boots, joining Marie in the huge bed.

Marie's grey eyes immediately connected with hers, before the child yawned deeply.

Lexa joined them only a moment later, lying down on Marie's other side and scooting closely to the child. Risha jumped onto the foot of the bed and rolled herself together there.

"Love you" the girl mumbled sleepily, probably directed at both of them equally. She fidgeted for a moment until she had found a comfortable spot and drifted off almost immediately.

The rest of the night passed in a much calmer fashion than Anya had anticipated. Marie seemed calmed enough by their combined presence that she slept through the night without truly waking once.

Lexa had calmed the child down on the single instance where she had started to toss and turn, but Marie had not truly woken up. The commander herself had not found rest easily in the past night. Guilt about the deaths of four of her nightbloods added together with the unresolved tension between herself and Clarke, had made it nearly impossible for the commander to silence her thoughts. When Lea finally opened her eyes, she could already feel the foreboding signs of an impending headache. Marie still slept peacefully, cuddled tightly to her side and Lexa lightly let her fingers trail over her back.

She turned her head slightly and looked at Anya, the general was already awake and seemed to have watched Marie, for how long, Lexa could not tell.

"I hate to say it, but she slept much better this way" Anya surmised with a sigh under her breath. She had known before that she would regret having agreed to sleep in the commander's quarters last night, but seeing now how much it had apparently helped Marie, it would be even harder to deny her from now on.

Lexa inclined her head in mute agreement, she had surmised the same already. She had had to calm Marie more often when the girl had come over to her and Clarke previously. The impending war was never too far from her mind these days and Lexa was aware that Marie only had a few short days left to recover from her time with Nia. They should try anything possible to aid her as best as possible and if this sleeping arrangement helped her in such a fashion, Lexa would not deny her simply for the sake of etiquette. Titus would surely have to say a lot about it, but as commander she would have the final say of course, Titus be damned.

Anya did not need her previous second to actually voice her thoughts, she could read them in her eyes easily enough. She huffed in light annoyance, if Lexa had already decided she knew that she would not need to argue with her. Still, Lexa should probably speak with Clarke before proclaiming to Marie that they could potentially move back into the commander's quarters for the time being.

"You are going to spoil her rotten" she commented over her shoulder, as Anya rolled into a sitting position, stretching her arms high over her head to align her back again.

Lexa huffed under her breath, but she did not outright deny her previous mentor's assessment either. She let her fingers continue their light caress and a slight smile ghosted over her lips, when Marie sighed in obvious contentment. "Is that such a problem?" she answered after a moment of silence.

Anya snorted with a shake of her head, but her expression softened visibly as she looked back down on Marie. She would have readily disagreed with Lexa weeks ago, but somehow, she could not find it in her to disagree now. "If we are to truly be more of mother figures to her, certainly not" Anya agreed in a breathy tone and a slight frown on her features after another moment of contemplation.

The general was still not certain how this was supposed to work out. She had more than enough experience in training a child as a second, but she had none experience with being a mother. She did not even have the possibility to look back onto her own mother. Anya barely had any memories left of her own family. Her parents had died when she had still been young and the village where she had been born in had more or less raised her, until she had been chosen as a second herself. Even though Anya was sure that she was much softer with Marie already than she had ever been with Lexa or Tris, Anya feared that she would never be soft enough to qualify for the term of a mother. She still could not fully understand how Marie had been able to connect with her like this, she had certainly not done anything to promote it in the beginning.

"Is Ontari still sleeping?" Lexa asked in a low tone, pulling the general from her thoughts.

Anya looked over to the couch. The nightblood's eyes were still closed and her face looked relaxed, she watched her for a moment and could not detect any signs that she could be pretending to sleep. She inclined her head in agreement and sat back down on the edge of the bed, sensing that Lexa had something longer to tell to her.

Lexa was fairly certain that Marie would remain asleep as well if she kept up her soothing motion. She lowly told the general what Ontari had entrusted her with last night.

Anger flashed over Anya's features, before Lexa could finish and she quickly grabbed one of the general's wrists to stop the woman, before she could violently wake the nightblood girl. "Don't!" Lexa hissed at the older woman "Let me finish before you judge her".

Anya narrowed her eyes at her previous second, glaring down at the hand encasing her wrist, but she ceased her movement and settled back on the bed, willing to at least hear her out. Still, her thoughts circled around the nightblood girl, she had been fairly certain that their tentative bond was developing slowly and she had been ready to trust the Ice Nation girl. It angered her, that her trust seemed to have been misplaced.

Ontari woke abruptly to the sound of hushed words. She kept as still as possible, as she strained her hearing. The voices did not sound like Marie, the girl tended to talk too loudly. She heard rustling sounds and expected that the commander and general might be getting up, and she wanted to get up as well, when she heard the commander's hissed words. She frowned slightly before she concluded that both women were speaking about her. Her frown deepened, but she kept her breathing even, not trying to garner their attention. Ontari wanted to hear what the commander would say about her. She was slightly annoyed that the commander was repeating what she had said to the general. If she had wanted the woman to know, she would have told her in person. But otherwise should she probably not be surprised by this at all.

Lexa shook her head vehemently, but she loosened her grip on the general's wrist. "As I see it, Ontari not acting on her chance and in fact even going so far to tell me afterwards says a lot. I doubt she has ever felt guilty in such a fashion" Lexa said.

Anya raised a brow at the brunette "So, you do not find it alarming in the slightest that she in fact did think about murdering you?". The general's tone dripped with sarcasm and her brown eyes were glinting angrily.

Lexa huffed slightly and rolled her eyes at her former mentor "Think about what coming here and telling me that means, will you?" she asked the other woman, impatience creeping into her tone.

Anya's lips thinned, but she contemplated Lexa's words in silence for a moment. Her gaze travelled over to the couch minutely, before it returned to Marie and her features softened noticeably. She sighed under her breath "Ontari's opinions must have changed drastically then" Anya acknowledged begrudgingly "I doubt she would have had any second thoughts to murder you and the conclave at her arrival in Polis".

"She has" Lexa agreed with a slight grimace. She rarely thought about what could have come to pass. In retrospect she had to agree with Gustus, without her the coalition would crumble to dust in only a few days, none of her nightbloods would manage to keep the clans together under one flag. She hoped that days would come where the coalition was stable and she did not have to fear her legacy being destroyed in case of her death.

Her fingers continued to lightly caress Marie's back "But so have we" Lexa added, voice even lower now.

Anya inclined her head as a slight frown settled on her features. She had just opened her mouth to retort something, when Marie stretched and blinked her eyes open sleepily.

The girl yawned deeply, before she smiled up at Lexa. She snuggled slightly closer to the woman and peered up at her through her lashes "Morning, Mommy" she mumbled, half hiding her face against Lexa's chest.

Anya blinked down at the girl, mouth slightly opened in surprise. A sudden surge of jealousy coursed through her mind. Marie had not yet addressed her in such a form, but Lexa did not seem caught completely off guard, which led her to believe that Marie had in fact already used the term previously.

"Slept well, little star?" Lexa asked, green eyes shining and the hint of a tease in her tone.

Marie nodded, her smile brightening "Better than ever" she commented chirpily.

Anya frowned, when she heard what sounded like a sharp intake of breath from Ontari. She stood from the bed abruptly, suddenly annoyed with the whole situation. She felt irritated that Ontari had obviously listened in on their conversation and that Marie had not yet said a single thing to her, yet practically confessed her love to Lexa already. She stalked off into the bathroom with quick angry strides, letting the door fall shut behind herself loudly.

Marie's smile fell visibly and her brows creased "Is Anya not feeling well?" she asked, voice tinted with worry.

Lexa sighed under her breath and gave the girl an encouraging smile "Do not think anything of it" she advised "Breakfast will be served soon" she added, urging the girl to entangle herself from her form.

Marie pouted visibly and tightened her grip on the commander's shirt "Not yet" she exclaimed "Just a little longer?" she added in an innocent tone.

Lexa's eyes showed her amusement at the girl's clingy antics. It was heartening to see the child acting like this again. "Just a moment" she agreed after a beat of silence.

Marie smiled brightly and sighed in contentment.

Lexa laughed lightly when she noticed that the girl's eyes were already drooping close again short moments later. Giving in to an inner flash of mirth, Lexa let her fingers which had previously caressed the girl's back, travel to her sides and began to tickle the child lightly.

Marie squirmed immediately under the ministrations, laughter bright and her shrieks shrill. "Stop!" she shrieked "Stop, please!".

The girl tried to wiggle herself out of the commander's reach, but Lexa lightly held onto the child's form.

"Get up then" Lexa paused for a moment and let Marie catch her breath. But the girl did not show any indication on actually wanting to leave the bed, so Lexa tickled her again.

A series of loudly ringing laughs escaped the girl's lips and she leapt from the bed when Anya returned from the bathroom a moment later.

The general's annoyed expression softened only slightly when Marie quickly jumped behind her, taking hold of her hip as if to hide behind her.

Lexa followed the girl with her lips tilted into a full-blown smile "You think Anya is going to protect you?" she asked Marie.

Marie peered up behind Anya and nodded with a toothy smile "She has to as my Mama" she reasoned in a matter of fact manner.

Anya blinked at Lexa with an almost owlish expression, clearly caught completely off-guard at the girl's off-hand usage of the term. Lexa smiled reassuringly at the older woman, seeing that something had calmed in Anya.

"So, I have to?" the general asked as she twisted around to face the child and her brown eyes twinkled cheerfully, as she bent down slightly and also attacked the girl with a tickle.

Marie shrieked loudly in surprise, backing off still laughing fully and actually running around the two women, coming to a halt beside Ontari, who had given up all pretence of sleeping and had sat up on the couch.

The Ice Nation nightblood felt absolutely uncomfortable in the whole situation. She had known already how deep the connection between Marie and the two women was, but hearing the child calling them as her mothers like this, was a new level even for them and she was baffled by it, unsure what to make of the change. Although she had been present at the initial conversation where Marie had asked both women to be allowed to call them that, she had never actually heard her use it until now.

"Ontari can protect me then" Marie proclaimed absolutely confident.

"Keep me out of that" Ontari immediately retorted with a raised brow.

Marie huffed, but before she could argue with Ontari, Anya shook her head, still smiling, and sent the girl into the bathroom to get ready for the day.

Chapter 206

"How does your shoulder feel?" Anya asked, turning from Lexa towards Ontari. Although she could clearly see how uncomfortable the Ice Nation nightblood was at the moment, she completely ignored the girl's discomfort.

Ontari's dark eyes narrowed at the general, the fact that the woman seemed genuinely interested in her health like that was rattling. The injury was nothing life-threatening, she was sure that she could train with it already, if she had to.

Anya's lips thinned in irritation and Ontari quickly mumbled "Hurts…", rolling her eyes subtly.

"A healer can provide you with something against the pain" Anya assured the nightblood easily, combing her hair and beginning to braid it as well.

Lexa watched the exchange between her former mentor and Ontari in silence, it was obvious that the girl still had difficulties to understand and accept the general's care, but she knew that Anya would not neglect her obligation to the girl because of that. She highly doubted that their relationship would ever grow into something even remotely as deep as what the both of them shared with Marie, but it seemed to work out much better than Lexa had anticipated beforehand. She would not have believed that the Ice Nation nightblood could truly benefit from a more personal tutelage, but the effects were already beginning to show.

Ontari still remained somewhat stiff and guarded now and Lexa internally wondered if her own presence was the only cause, but she doubted that the girl's reaction would have been vastly different within the general's quarters.

Marie returned to them short moments later, the girl had given up on trying to braid her own hair, so it hung loosely around her face now, a few locks obscuring her view and gentling her sharpened features. Although the emotional exertion of the previous day still showed in her face, a smile lingered on her lips and happiness showed in her grey eyes.

Anya motioned Ontari mutely to go into the bathroom now.

The nightblood followed the general's silent order without hesitation, until she spotted the general following her and she stopped in her tracks, twisting around slightly to face the woman "I do not…" she began to argue, voice already raised slightly in apparent anger.

Anya's jaw clenched in growing irritation and her brown eyes blazed slightly "Just go into the bathroom!" she seethed at the stubborn girl through clenched teeth. She did not know why the girl was being so difficult right now; Ontari had not even been able to get off her own boots last night, so Anya could not fathom how the girl intended to wash herself now without any kind of assistance. They of course could call in a healer or even handmaid to assist the girl in her stead, but she preferred to personally help her charge.

Ontari internally contemplated the likelihood of her convincing the general that she could fend for herself, but the Trikru woman already looked irate enough as it was and she highly doubted that she would win this argument. She did not understand why the woman seemed so insisting to offer her actual help now, no one had cared for her in such a fashion before and it was slightly unnerving to her to be confronted with it now. After a moment of mute contemplation, she huffed and accepted that she would not be able to discourage the general and would have to accept her help for now. For Marie accepting this form of help seemed natural and the younger girl did not even seem to contemplate the meaning behind it, but Ontari still found it difficult to truly trust the general like this.

While Marie frowned at the older girl, confused why Ontari was putting up a fight about something like that at all, Lexa smirked slightly.

The commander could perfectly sympathise with the nightblood girl and it was obvious that the relationship between the general and her charge would remain strained in this sense for some time to come. She highly doubted that Ontari would ever truly accept the general's new role in her life and Lexa understood that it would be difficult to accept a first at such a late stage of her training, the girl had undoubtedly learned the hard way to only trust in herself and giving up some of her indecency like that forced the nightblood girl to surrender a certain amount of power over her own person to Anya. It would certainly continue to be a back and forth between the two, until they had truly gotten used to each other.

"When will breakfast be delivered?" Marie asked, voice chirpy; she had not had the stomach to eat much yesterday, but she was rather hungry now.

Lexa looked down at the blonde child, tearing her gaze from the door to the bathroom "It cannot be long now" she assured kindly. She was slightly surprised by the girl's good mood, after the vigil yesterday and Nymo still on the brink of death, she had expected Marie to be downtrodden, but she seemed to have taken everything surprisingly well. In the back of her mind Lexa feared how the girl would react when Nymo truly died and Marie had a few hours to contemplate what had happened the last days, she hoped that the child would not suffer from another setback and resort to hurt herself again in the process, all of them would need to keep a closer eye on Marie for the time being.

Having to put four of her nightblood children to rest, setting free their souls, pained Lexa deeply. She felt that she had failed them still. Before her, no commander had truly had any connection to the nightblood generation following afterwards. Lexa thought she would not have felt their loss so keenly, if she also had not seen them grow up under her tutelage. She could almost fathom now, why her predecessors had preferred not to get into close contact with the nightblood generation following them.

The fact that there had not been any kind of news on Nymo's condition yet, was both a blessing and a curse. If the medication had helped him and he had recovered, a messenger would surely have told them so already. But there neither had been any word of his death yet, which meant that the nightblood boy was still fighting for his survival, Lexa could only hope now that he would be strong enough and pull through. The rational part of her mind had already accepted that Nymo would soon join his deceased brothers and sisters.

The thought of the wounded nightblood boy reminded Lexa sharply of the fact that she still needed to organize a part of the troops to take out the clan-less bandits. She looked down at Marie contemplatively, wondering if it would do the girl some good to acquire more fighting experience on a battlefield before their real war with Azgeda would begin. The girl's self-inflicted wounds were healing nicely, but Clarke was insistent that Marie should not train just yet. Lexa was sure that Anya would gladly take up the chance to leave the capitol and get back onto a battle field, she knew how antsy the general got, stuck in the capitol and only the fighting pits as an outlet.

"Can I braid your hair again?" Marie asked, glancing up at the commander with big hopeful eyes, pulling the woman from her thoughts.

Lexa smiled at the child good-naturedly, her hair did not really require for a replacement of the braids and Alira would surely be able to get the task done quicker and more efficiently, but it was clear that Marie took great joy in being allowed to braid her hair and Lexa so no harm in indulging the child either, so she nodded in mute agreement.

Marie let out a clear sound of delight and she eagerly waited, comb already in her hand, for Lexa to sit down and immediately began her task.

A few moments passed in peaceful silence between them. Lexa had closed her eyes and simply let Marie tend to her hair, planning ahead of what she had to do today. She absentmindedly remembered that Anya had mentioned Marie's wish to have the opportunity to see Roan again.

"Lexa..." Marie's low voice pulled her out of her thoughts again, the child had spoken hesitantly and Lexa waited for her to voice what she wanted.

When a few moments passed without Marie saying anything, Lexa asked softly, eyes still closed "What is it?"

"You do not mind..." Marie began to voice her question, but stopped again, biting at her lips in hesitation.

Lexa twisted slightly, so that she could look at the child, the girl had paused in her task of braiding her hair and her grey eyes had a look of insecurity in them. "I do not mind what?" she inquired, voice a little more forceful now, while her expression remained kind and calm.

"That I called you Mommy..." Marie breathed out, fumbling with the comb in her fingers instead of looking at the commander in a clearly nervous gesture.

Lexa smiled gently at the child and thought that fiddling with a comb was an improvement compared to scratching at her own hands and she raised Marie's chin to reconnect their eyes "I have told you before that I will be honoured for you to think of me as a mother figure…" she reassured the girl again.

Marie's smile was a little wobbly, insecurities still visibly clinging to her features, so Lexa added after a short hesitation "…as I see you as a daughter to me" the commander felt her own heart beat a little faster at the admission, which had fallen from her lips. She may have already thought exactly in this fashion of the girl in the privacy of her mind, but voicing the words out loud somehow felt different, important, freeing and dangerous at the same time.

Marie blinked at Lexa for a moment, expression dumbstruck, while she heard the commander's last words replaying in her ears. After a short moment, Marie's face was brightened by a blinding smile and she immediately threw her arms around Lexa's neck. "Love you, Mommy" she repeated her words, mumbled into the crook of Lexa's throat.

Lexa tightened her arms around the girl's smaller body, allowing herself a small moment just to enjoy their connection. She had never dared to dream to ever be gifted with something so precious and pure as the unconditional love of a child.

She had of course felt connected to the nightblood children and all of them had a special place in her heart, but it was different with them. She had never allowed herself to forget, even for a little moment, that these children were in Polis to be trained as her successor, doomed to have to face their siblings in the conclave, killing each other until only the next commander remained.

The love she now felt flowing through her whole being, body and soul, for Marie was different, more encompassing and Lexa even felt slightly frightened by the strength of her own feelings. She could not completely ban the teachings of "love is weakness" from her mind, no matter how hard she tried. But Lexa was unwilling to accept now that she had to be alone to remain strong, she was not naive enough anymore to think that she was not weakened by her love, because she knew that she would go to a great length to protect the girl from harm, but she had to believe that there was a strength in this as well.

Marie backed out of their embrace long moments later, loud footsteps resonated outside of the doors to the commander's chambers.

The girl's cheeks visibly glistened with the silvery tracks of her tears and Lexa hoped that the girl had cried out of joy or had been overwhelmed by her feelings. She gave the girl another smile, as she quickly wiped the signs of her tears from the child's features.

Only the beat of a moment passed, before the door was opened and Alira stepped inside, carrying breakfast.

The handmaid greeted the commander respectfully and she smiled lightly at the child "I see that you have already begun with my work" she commented, placing the tray filled with a wide variety of food on one of the tables.

Marie smiled sheepishly at the handmaid "I can open them again…" she offered, her voice still a little breathy from just having cried.

Alira shook her head, stepping around the commander, who remained sitting on the stole with a slight smirk on her lips. It was obvious that the handmaid was indulging the girl with her antics and Lexa was grateful for it. "You need to pull a little tighter on the hair, to make the braids slightly smaller" Alira assessed, inspecting the child's work carefully "The braids will also hold longer that way".

Marie nodded eagerly, absorbing the information immediately with curious grey eyes. She watched intently when Alira did open one particularly lose braid, showing her slowly on how to perfect it, before the handmaid quickly put the finishing touches to the commander's hairs.

Lexa mutely motioned Marie to sit down as well, once her hair was finished and Alira mutely began to work on the girl's hair. Marie was not practised enough in braiding to get the braids to hold in her shortened hair and she could not comfortably rise her hands this high anyway. She pushed the tea for Marie in the child's direction and kept a stern face, when the girl immediately began to protest.

Marie scowled lightly, glaring at the mug in her hand, but began to drink the brew a moment later anyway.

Anya and Ontari joined them a moment later, while Alira went around the room, collecting clothes to be washed and rearranging the furs and pillows on the commander's bed.

"Drink the damned tea!" Anya immediately reprimanded the girl in a sharp tone, she had already had to argue with the girl about the tea the previous few meals and her patience was running out on the subject.

Marie winced slightly at the reprimand and gulped down the rest of the brew quickly and in complete silence, putting the empty mug down a little too forceful and almost provocatively pushing it into Anya's direction.

Ontari kept her gaze locked on her own plate of food. It was obvious that the general's mood was already strained and she could only guess that the commander's nerves were bound to be frayed as well. She would have advised Marie to behave herself now, but it seemed the girl's mood was shifting and she was not sitting closely enough to signal her subtly, without alerting the two women as well.

"Cease your attitude right this instance" Anya ordered, teeth clenched and irritation with the girl rising.

Marie's lips thinned and defiance flashed through her grey eyes "I don't have an attitude" she retorted sulkily.

"Marie…" it was Lexa who silenced the girl quickly and although her single word had been delivered in a calm tone, her expression was strict and warning.

Marie pouted visibly, but returned her attention to her own breakfast instead.

Anya opened her mouth to reprimand the child for starting once again by eating her honey cake, but closed it again, shaking her head mutely instead.

"Is there any word on Nymo's condition yet?" Lexa disrupted the sudden tension at the table, addressing Alira.

The handmaid visibly faltered for a moment, before she turned to the commander. "I have seen Wanheda tending to him a candle mark ago" she reported "It did not seem as if the Skykru medicine was helping him…" her words trailed off heavily and the woman's features were drawn in compassion for the nightblood boy.

Lexa sighed under her breath, shoulders sagging just a little bit, as she inclined her head. She had feared already that Clarke would not be able to save the boy's life and she knew that she could already prepare herself mentally for the confrontation that was bound to happen between them, once Nymo had died.

Marie looked crestfallen at the woman's words and her lower lip visibly trembled.

Ontari would have liked to reach out and physically comfort the younger girl, she internally wondered if the own compassion she felt for the boy's impending death was solely due to Marie's sorrow.

The rest of the breakfast passed in a rather oppressing silence and Ontari was almost glad when the general proclaimed that she and Marie were to accompany her back to the training pits where Talia would be waiting to continue their lesson in the language of the scouts.

Lexa had scheduled another meeting with the ambassadors, finalizing some part of the plans to finally march the army into the north. In the last days most of the army had arrived in the capitol and only a very few numbers of delegations were still missing and were expected to arrive in a week the latest, probably earlier still.

Now that Titus had returned to Polis, she would also still need to arrange the finer details of how the flamekeeper was supposed to rule the coalition in her stead until she returned. They would not need to speak about the possibility of her never returning to the capitol, the flamekeeper had served four of her predecessors and new better than everyone else what needed to happen then. Lexa dearly hoped that there would not need to be a conclave soon and she would need to speak with the flamekeeper of sending out more scouts to search for more nightblood children as well.

Marie only begrudgingly followed Anya out of the commander's quarters. She had of course sensed that Anya's mood was still rather bleak and she did not feel like having another lesson with Talia. She would have liked nothing better than to simply stay with Lexa, preferably inside of the commander's rooms, curled into an armchair together and listening to the woman read something to her. Her own mood improved ten-fold, when they encountered Risha on the way down to the basement of the tower.

The wolf had left the commander's quarters very early in the morning and had not returned until now.

Marie smiled at Risha and the wolf immediately trailed around her legs, tail wagging in greeting.

Ontari still did not appear completely comfortable to be in close proximity to the wolf, but her dark eyes had a fond shine to them, as she watched Marie and Risha interact.

Anya impatiently told both girls to finally follow her out of the tower and led them towards the fighting pits.

More warriors had arrived in the capitol during the last three days and the streets were almost bursting with the different people.

Marie's smile faltered visibly at the sight of the crowd and she stepped as close to Anya as possible, feeling her heart rate pick up frantically. She breathed more easily, when she felt one of Anya's hands on the small of her back, resting there reassuringly. She sensed Ontari also walking closer to her other side and she gave the nightblood a fleeting grateful smile for the gesture.

The sight of all the different warriors filling Polis to its limit reminded Marie somehow of the army's camp before they had marched against Mount Weather. Although she had no known for weeks that Lexa prepared a war against Ice Nation, seeing the army assembled now, really made the realization sink into her mind. "The army will be ready to leave Polis soon, right?" she addressed Anya, grey eyes a little widened and voice hesitant. Marie knew that she would be accompanying Lexa and Anya and that Ontari would also come with them and she had known so for weeks as well. The prospect of having to potentially face the queen again made the blood freeze to ice in her veins and breathing quickened again as panic began to take hold of her mind.

Anya looked on in alarm, how Marie suddenly faltered in her steps. The girl's complexion turned deathly pale in the blink of an eye and she easily recognized the horror passing through the child's mind. She did not even have the opportunity to answer Marie's original question, before her panic had begun.

Anya frowned in worry, fearing what would be happening on a battle field, if the mere thought of the war against Azgeda elicited such panic in the girl.

Ontari had stopped beside Marie as well, dark eyes worried and hands hovering in front of the girl, obviously afraid that touching her now, would only worsen the girl's panic.

Anya pulled the panicked girl from the centre of the road, removing her from the complete focus of the crowd. They had not gathered too much attention yet, but they would, if Marie's panic got out of hand.

Marie struggled lightly against the hands on her shoulder, her gaze had become clouded with black dancing dots and a loud rushing sound in her ears blocked out all other noises from her surrounding, she quickly forgot where she was at all.

Anya easily pulled the girl into an embrace a second later, pressing her smaller body against herself tightly and she felt Marie's feeble struggle fade quickly. She tried to sooth the child with her words, instructing her lowly to follow her breathing.

It took long moments until Marie's body truly relaxed again and she gasped loudly, as if resurfacing from a water surface. Her grey eyes were wide and flitted quickly between Anya and Ontari. "I am sorry…" she immediately apologized, voice still shaking noticeably.

"It is alright" Anya reassured the girl in a soft tone, letting go of the child a moment later as she stood up again. Her brown eyes stayed on the child the whole time, hoping that Marie was truly alright again. She suppressed a grimace at the thought that Marie obviously now did have huge problems with facing a crowd without falling into panic. "You do not need to be afraid" she tried to reassure Marie who still seemed visibly shaken "Ontari and I will surely not let anyone harm you here" she added after a second.

Marie frowned slightly, brows knitting together "It was not about that" she defended quickly and her voice took on a desperate tone as she added "…how am I to face the queen like this?"

Chapter 207

Anya looked down at the girl, gaze filled with sadness for a second, before she steeled herself. Pitying the child would not help either of them, but all of them would make sure that Nia would never again be able to touch a single hair on Marie's head.

She crouched down in front of the girl and her brown eyes burned with a fiery protectiveness as she firmly grasped onto Marie's shoulders "Nia will not hurt you again" Anya promised, tone strong and convinced, she would rather die protecting the girl than watching her suffer like this again.

Marie's expression still looked doubtful, but she nodded. Her smile was shaky at best as she met Ontari's dark eyes over Anya's shoulder as well. She stiffened visibly when she noticed that people were already stopping in their paths, watching them from afar.

"Can we go?" she asked hesitantly, voice low and grey eyes darting through the crowd quickly.

Anya pursed her lips lightly, she knew that now was neither the time nor the place to have this kind of talk with the girl, so she inclined her head, standing up again. She motioned Marie to walk ahead of her, keeping one hand on the child's back reassuringly, while her other casually rested on the hilt of her sword. Although Anya highly doubted that anyone would dare to attack Marie or Ontari in her presence, she knew well enough that the tension in a crowd could shift in a moment's notice.

Ontari walked directly next to Marie, keeping her injured child to the younger girl and away from the crowd. She would not admit it, but she was not blind to the hateful gazes of most of the warriors and she was aware that she was in no state of health to defend herself efficiently. The scars etched into the skin on her face pointed out her origin for everyone plain to see and Ontari was not truly convinced that the commander's protection alone would quell the warriors' rightful anger against Ice Nation and keep her safe.

"Nia will not survive this war" the nightblood girl proclaimed lowly to Marie under her breath, keeping her dark eyes looking ahead of them.

Marie shivered lightly at the older girl's words, her voice had sounded dark and absolutely certain. She wondered for a moment if Ontari would even kill the queen herself if she got the chance. She did not care to imagine what she would do when she truly stood in front of the queen again. Marie shuddered in fright, she could almost feel the queen's piercing gaze raking over her body again.

Marie slowed her pace even further, startling Anya in the process, so that she was now walking between Anya and Ontari and she quickly grasped onto the general's hand. Risha whined lowly, pressing herself against Marie's legs as well.

Ontari bit back a hiss of pain when Marie bumped into her injured shoulder and she pressed her lips together tightly for a moment, breathing out strongly.

Marie frowned in confusion, when she noticed that a huge part of the warriors was now moving in their opposite direction. "The army is not going to leave already, right?" she asked over her shoulder towards Anya, voice quivering slightly.

The general shook her head in the negative. Lexa would have told her that already and preparations would have been made ahead for them as well. She felt Marie's fingers tightening almost painfully around her own, but she did not try to pry them from her hand either, instead continuing their way towards the training pits.

The warriors of her unit were already there, occupied with combat training. Anya left both of her charges at the edge of the training pits with the sharp order to remain where they were. She could see Talia already breaking away from her fighting partner and making her way over to the girls. The general nodded to the female warrior on her way, taking up Talia's abandoned place, rolling her shoulders lightly.

Marie sat down closely to Ontari, so close that their legs were already touching each other. Her mind was not really into the lesson Talia was trying to instil in them, her focus strayed every few moments again.

It was obvious that the war was going to start in a few days and she was honestly deeply afraid of having to be a part of it. Marie doubted that she would feel saver left behind in the capitol though, she would worry nonstop that Lexa, Anya or Ontari might not be returning again.

But the mere thought of having to face the queen again, made her heart stop beating momentarily in her chest and her breathing stuck in her throat. She did not doubt that all three of them would protect her against the queen, but it would be foolish to assume that she would truly be protected. She remembered Lexa telling Clarke before the Mountain that plans did rarely last long in battle, so no matter how carefully they would plan, there was no way pf predicting the future.

Marie's thoughts strayed to Nymo and she felt her chest contract painfully. She was sitting here outside of the tower, while her friend was battling for his life inside.

Ontari tried to pay attention what Talia was trying to teach to them. Marie seemed to have a better talent at grasping this kind of language skill and she still somehow doubted that she would ever be truly needing it at all. The younger girl seemed far away with her thoughts now and also Ontari was convinced that Talia had noticed that fact as well, the warrior seemed to focus her attention on herself instead.

Marie wondered what would happen if she indeed managed to try to heal Nymo. She knew that there was no way of telling ahead if she would be able to or not, she had not been able to heal Clarke after all. She was certain that both Anya and Lexa would be incredibly angry with her, if she sneaked away and tried to use her power. The boy's injury was well known, so she would not be able to explain how his hand had suddenly healed, if she succeeded. Internally she mused what might happen, when more people learned of her talent.

She would like to tell Ontari about it, trying to gauge her reaction and by thus how others might react. She wondered if the older girl's reaction might have been different months ago. She remembered Anya's and Lexa's almost harsh denial for her to tell anyone else. She trusted Ontari and she knew without a doubt that the older girl would not do anything to hurt her.

She remembered about the injured horse as well. Marie pursed her lips, she had not used her talent in some time and wondered if she would be able to at all. Maybe she just needed some practise. They did not know a lot about her talent, how it worked, if it had restrictions or what Lexa seemed to fear, repercussions for herself in the long run.

Marie was fairly certain that Anya would not let her leave out of her sight at the moment and although Ontari had no idea what really was going on, she could feel her dark eyes flitting over to herself every few seconds.

"Marie, are you listening at all?" Talia interrupted her thoughts abruptly.

Marie looked up at the warrior, startled out of her internal musing. She lowered her eyes with a slight blush on her cheeks and she nodded minutely in agreement. She let her fingers card through Risha's fur. The wolf was lying at her other side.

She tried to keep her focus on the lesson from now on, but she found it particularly hard. Her thoughts kept on returning to Nymo, the wounded horse and the Ice queen.

When Talia stood up again, some time later, ending the lesson, when Anya returned to their side.

The general's breathing was elated and sweat dripped down her face visibly. She had learned from another warrior that Lexa had given the order to sent a few troops to the place where the conclave had been attacked, extinguishing the bandits once and for all. She would have liked to be part of one of the troops, but she also doubted that separating from Marie and Ontari at this moment, would be a good idea either and neither of her charges was in the physical condition yet to go onto a battle field.

It would take a few more days before they would be able to leave the capitol and she hoped that Ontari's shoulder would heal enough in that time or riding would be highly uncomfortable for the nightblood girl. Marie's physical injuries were not severe, it was rather the question if the girl would be able to mentally withstand what had happened.

"Can I go to the stables?" Marie asked, grey eyes innocent, looking up at Anya with an easy expression. She did not know if the general would let her go unsupervised and she also did not know if she would be alone inside, but maybe she was and could so try to heal the horse. It must be hard for such a creature to suffer from a broken leg, she somehow doubted that the animal would really understand that the people were just trying to help it.

Anya pursed her lips, she wanted to return to the tower, get cleaned up and bring both of her charges back inside as well. The girl had not been at the stables for some time now, so she was not truly surprised that Marie would ask to be allowed to go again.

She had opened her mouth to answer, when a messenger hurried to them. "The commander summons you to her chambers" the young man relayed quickly, not even waiting for a moment for an answer.

Anya frowned as she looked behind the retreating messenger, wondering what had happened. She had a gnawing suspicion and she hoped to be proven wrong.

"What is going on?" Marie questioned, forgetting about her request to go to the stables for now and her grey eyes were worried as she gazed up at the general. Risha pressed a little closer to her human, feeling the girl's rising agitation.

"I do not know" Anya retorted curtly, carelessly wiping the sweat from her forehead with her sleeve "Come" she addressed both girls likewise, motioning them in the direction of the tower.

Ontari quickly got to her feet, hissing lightly, when she nearly lost her balance and only the general grasping onto her arm kept her from falling over completely. She grimaced at the rippling pain the motion caused beneath the bandage on her shoulder. She desperately hoped that the stitches had not been ripped from her carelessness, she had no wish to have them done a third time.

Anya frowned slightly at the nightblood girl, the girl's complexion had turned pale minutely, probably from the pain of her injury and she made a mental note, to sent the girl to a healer later. If the girl's injury did not begin to heal in the next days, she could not responsibly agree to Ontari being part of the army as well.

The way towards the tower passed in silence, Anya did not make a comment when Marie took hold of one of her hands again. She wondered why the girl was acting like this all of a sudden, but she would not deny Marie the small comfort the contact obviously brought to her. When she officially claimed the child as her daughter, there would be no sense in pretending not to be close to her anyway.

They could hear shouts coming from the commander's quarters already, when they stepped from the elevator on the top of the tower.

Ontari had unobtrusively tried to reach a hand around and brought her fingers to the bandage beneath her shirt, she cussed lightly under breath, when they came back lightly tainted black from fresh blood.

Anya caught the girl's movements from the corner of her eyes and her eyes narrowed "You seek out a healer immediately" she directed in a sharp tone. She could already recognize the raised voice as belonging to Clarke, so another healer would take care of Ontari.

Marie's brows were furrowed as her gaze flitted between Ontari and the door to Lexa's quarters, she was torn between wanting to stay with the older girl and finding out why Lexa and Clarke seemed to be fighting.

Anya had already connected what Clarke's presence in the commander's rooms meant, Nymo must have lost his fight and succumbed to his infection.

Ontari seemed to come to the same conclusion only a second later, as a shadow passed quickly over her features, she nodded towards the general, before she stepped back into the elevator, signalling her intent to be brought back down several levels. Before the doors closed, she gave Marie a little pained smile.

Anya put a hand lightly on Marie's shoulder whose gaze had still been locked on the now closed elevator, motioning the girl to get moving again silently.

Gustus stood in front of the commander's door with a clear displeased grimace on his face "Should have slit her throat already for her insolence…" he grumbled to Anya in passing, dark eyes shining angrily, before he opened the door for Anya and Marie.

Clarke and Lexa stood a few inches apart and while Lexa looked collected and calm, Clarke's features were contorted with anger and grief.

"…all your fault!" the enraged blonde raged at Lexa, not even stopping her rant, which had been ongoing for some time already, when she sensed that they were not alone in the room any longer. "You have just let him die!" she shouted at the commander "A boy, you were sworn to protect as your possible successor and you just stood back and watched him die!"

Lexa's jaw was clenched and her teeth ground together visibly. She was trying hard to hold on to her composure. To hear the news of Nymo's death had been a harsh blow, she had already mentally prepared herself for it, but it had hurt nevertheless.

"Clarke!" Anya addressed the blonde healer in a sharp tone, wanting to prompt the girl to stop in her rant and to calm down. Words spoken in anger were mostly those you regretted later, once your head had cleared, but they would have already caused the hurt they had been supposed to. It did not seem as if Lexa was planning to put a stop to Clarke's rant either, her previous second's expression showed slightly how troubled she was. It would not take much more for Clarke to push Lexa too far. To her great irritation, Lexa held up her hand, stopping her protest.

Clarke's eyes shortly fell on Marie, before she looked back at Lexa, hands balled to angry fists at her side "I can understand your wish to keep her save" she seethed "But you elevated her life about everyone else's. Did you not say love is weakness?" Clarke said bitterly. She was convinced that Marie would have somehow have been able to help the boy, she had to believe that and Lexa would have surely managed to keep the child safe regardless.

Marie's eyes widened at Clarke's words, she knew that all three women had previously agreed that it was saver to not even let her try to heal Nymo and she looked between Anya and Lexa, desperately waiting for one of them to say something. Her words had felt like a sort of slap, she truly understood now that Nymo was dead and she had not even had the chance to try and heal him. She would never know now, if she could have at all.

Anya's hands balled to angry fists at her side and a low growl seemed to emit from her, only Lexa's apparent wish not to intervene held the general in her place now.

Lexa's green eyes flashed dangerously for a second "Are you not trying to convince me of the opposite?" she retorted, tone tinted with exhaustion. She had already feared that Nymo would not survive, but she had now officially lost five nightbloods in the span of only a few days. Only three nightbloods were alive now to fight in a conclave, if it happened soon, the other three still too young to compete. Clarke's words had struck a chord, she had sworn to protect them and she had failed miserably at it.

Clarke seemed oblivious to the pain her words had caused in the commander. Marie wondered internally if the blonde might not have noticed and was rather seeking to only deepen it right now in her own sorrow.

Clarke stepped even closer to Lexa, physically pushing at her shoulders with an angry scowl on her features.

Anya gritted her teeth when Lexa immediately subtly shook her head, telling her mutely to stay back and not to interfere on her behalf, as she stumbled back lightly from Clarke.

Clarke only followed her and pushed her again, as the first tears ran down her face. "You have let him die! I could have saved him by taking off his hands, but you would rather stuck to tradition than save him, you have condemned him to death!" she repeated through clenched teeth and her blue eyes swam in tears and screamed of sorrow "Just like you would have let all of Skykru die in the Mountain" she added and a coldness infused her eyes "That is what you are good at, leaving others behind to die. You have not cared for Skykru and the alliance and you surely have not cared for the boy as well".

Lexa appeared for a second as if Clarke had physically slapped her, hurt washed over her features to have the Mountain being hurled at her in this moment. It took the commander only the fraction of a second to pull herself back together and her expression hardened, while she stood prouder and taller again.

When Clarke, apparently only incensed further at Lexa's quick recovery, tried to push at the other woman again, Lexa did not budge even a millimetre now.

Her green eyes did not even show a hint of her feelings any longer and her voice was deathly calm and cold "Get out!" she ordered "I have to prepare for the funeral rites". She turned away from Clarke slightly and nodded towards Anya.

The general understood the silent order without any need for clarification and she stepped up next to Clarke, grasping on to one of her arms in a bruising grip and she internally hoped that her fingers would truly leave bruises behind and leading the blonde healer out of the commander's chambers. Clarke struggled against her hold, but Anya was rather unimpressed with her efforts.

Marie watched both of them go with widened eyes, she was speechless for a moment with what Clarke had hurled at Lexa.

When she looked over at Lexa only a moment later, the woman's façade was already crumbling.

Gone was the strong and expressionless mask, replaced with deep sorrow and hurt.

Marie felt her own throat constrict painfully as she hesitantly stepped closer to the woman. She remembered how she had hugged the commander after Sierra's execution as well and even back then the commander had not rejected her comfort.

"Mommy…" she addressed the commander in a quivering tone "I am sorry…" she added after a second.

Lexa looked over at Marie immediately and she felt a tear slide down her own cheek, while she felt the girl step closer to her and her small arms wrapped tightly around her midriff.

"You have done nothing to apologize for" she proclaimed, voice thick and gruff. Clarke's words kept on replaying in her mind. She had already feared that the woman would someday use what had happened at the Mountain against her, but hearing it like that, had been worse than any physical attack could have been.

Lexa let herself crouch down to her knees, so that she could properly embrace the child and she felt incredibly calmed by the girl's warmth in her arms.

"I am sorry for your loss" Marie clarified after a moment of silence. Her own eyes had watered with unshed tears, when the realization sunk into her mind, that her friend had truly died.

Before Lexa could retort that Marie had also been close to Nymo, the girl added faintly "… I have not even tried to heal him" and her tone seemed heavy with guilt.

Lexa swallowed forcefully, regretting that her own decision was causing Marie to feel guilty now. "It is not possible to save everyone" she said solemnly after another moment of silence. She did not know right now how things between herself and Clarke would continue in the future, but she would not change her decision concerning Marie. Clarke may be right, she had chosen Marie's safety over Nymo's survival, but she would stop at nothing to protect her daughter.

Chapter 208

Anya physically dragged Clarke along, not paying the younger woman's struggle any mind, her expression a dark scowl and her brown eyes were stormy. In her opinion, Clarke had definitely gone too far, she could understand a lingering grudge because of Lexa's choice at the Mountain to a little extent, but using Marie in such a fashion in an argument and the love the commander held for the child was a strike below the belt and although Anya knew how forgiving Lexa was by nature, she doubted that her previous second would forgive and forget this fight so easily.

She pulled the younger woman into the elevator, bringing her down one level and into the room which had been originally assigned to the Skykru healer. Anya let the door fall shut behind them loudly with a banging sound and only then let go of Clarke's arm, crossing her arms over her chest, before she could reach out and physically slap the girl for her insolent stupidity.

The difference in their size allowed Anya to efficiently tower over the blonde younger woman, staring her down in anger.

Clarke huffed angrily, her blue eyes blazing back at the general, clearly unfazed by her apparent anger.

"Do you have any inclination to what you have just done?" Anya seethed at Clarke. She could fathom how deeply the woman's words must have hurt Lexa.

Clarke pursed her lips "I just gave Lexa a piece of my mind" she retorted, anger still coursing hotly through her veins. Her fingers were still stained black with the boy's blood and she had been helpless to lower his fever. She had held Nymo's uninjured hand all through the night, trying to calm him from his fevered dreams. She had been forced to do nothing on Lexa's orders, having to sit back and watch the poor boy die had been somehow even harder than watching the Mountain Men die.

Anya raised a brow at the girl, unimpressed at her antics. "You are extremely lucky that Lexa apparently still cares if you live or die" she proclaimed, tone almost nonchalant. She was certain that Gustus would readily have helped her kill Clarke, not that she would have needed any actual help for that, the girl was still a pathetic fighter at best.

Clarke rolled her eyes "As if she cares…" she retorted, but the rest of her words died on her tongue, when Anya faced her fully, a glare on her face that promised a slow and most painful death.

"You are angry that the boy died" Anya assessed, teeth still clenched and internally wondering over the girl's apparently never-ending stupidity "and you apparently still do not think before you open your mouth" she drawled. She had told the girl so before, she hoped that she would not have to do so again afterwards.

Clarke opened her mouth to retort something, but Anya stopped her before she could say more. "Silence!" Anya thundered angrily at the healer "Nymo would not have survived a conclave with only one hand. Only the physically strongest nightblood can rise to be commander, he would have been questioned on his strength constantly. You may have been able to give him a few years, but you can not know if an amputation might have even been able to save him at all. He was condemned to death as soon as his wound got infected"

Clarke's breathing turned harder, as she glared at the general. "Then he could not have competed in the conclave, so what?" she retorted "He could have done something else!"

"No" Anya denied vehemently, brown eyes staring the girl down relentlessly "No nightblood cannot partake in the conclave who is old enough to fight. Only one survives and rises as the next commander. The day on which Lexa dies, would have ultimately been his death as well".

Clarke swallowed once, a flash of the time the assassins had managed to nearly kill Lexa passing in front of her eyes momentarily. "Luna still lives" she retorted, trying almost stubbornly to hold onto her anger. She was convinced it was righteous, but she could feel it fading.

Anya shook her head, exasperation rising again "Luna still lives because Lexa allowed it" she spelled out in a raised tone "Titus regularly still tries to convince her to have Luna assassinated. A nightblood who is old enough to take over the throne, can mean a successful coup could be staged against the current commander, the danger is too great of that coming to pass, to allow one to survive, only to steer trouble later".

Clarke pursed her lips and closed her eyes for a second, she could see that the general was still incredibly angry, her anger lingered in her clenched fingers and jaw, brown eyes glittering hard. She knew already how protective the general was of Lexa, it took her a moment to connect just in what exact context she had included Marie in their fight. Including the Mountain and using it to only deepening Lexa's hurt with it, had surely not been her smartest move either. While Clarke mutely contemplated about what she had said, a grimace rested on her features.

"For someone who claims to love Lexa, you surely know how to hurt her the deepest" Anya commented, voice cold and eyes hard. It was obvious that the blonde woman was just now thinking about what she had said during the fight with Lexa.

Clarke winced visibly at the general's words, realizing just how low her blows had been. Her lips thinned at the realization that Lexa had just taken everything in stride, she had pushed the woman as far as she could, but the commander had not retaliated neither physically nor verbally. She felt physically ill all of a sudden, she had royally fucked up and now that her anger had subsided mostly, she could recognize that as well.

"I am sorry…" she offered, a little meekly. Clarke was never too sure about her standing with the general and she was sure that the fight Anya had just been witness to, would have lost her a lot of standing with the Trikru woman.

"It is not me you have to apologize to" Anya retorted, expression still as hard as stone. When Clarke moved in the direction of the door, her arm shot out again, stopping the blonde woman in her movement. "No" she shook her head "Now is not the time. The funeral rites will take place shortly".

Clarke deflated visibly, but she nodded in acknowledgement. She did not know if her presence would be welcomed at the funeral rites now or not.

Anya tightened her grip on Clarke's arm for a moment and her brown eyes blazed threateningly "However, if you ever try to use Marie in such a form again or even consider making her talent public, not even Lexa will be able to save you then" she said in a deadly serious tone and let go of the girl's arm again, straightening herself.

Clarke nodded vehemently, her blue eyes had widened visibly at the general's words. She would have liked to defend herself, telling the older woman that she would not consider making Marie's power public, but she knew Anya well enough, her words would not ease the general's mind now. Her words would be hypocrite as well, she had already used Marie against Lexa during their fight, she may feel ashamed about that now, but it did not change the fact, that she had.

Clarke closed her eyes again, as she heard the general turn and leave the room. Silence settled around her, while their fight resonated loudly through her mind. She had promised Lexa to be there for her whenever she needed her and at the first instance where she disagreed with the commander's decision, she had stood against her. Clarke dearly hoped that she would somehow be able to apologize to Lexa, she had fought the leader so hard to be allowed inside her heart and she felt as if she had erased all this progress by one single fight. One single instance, where she had let her feelings overtake her rationality and she had to lash out Lexa, probably the one who truly was the most undeserving of her anger. She was angry at the injustice of the whole system, but Lexa had not made the grounder society, she was trying to change it for the better, but the changes needed time. It was a tragedy that the changes had not been implemented quick enough to save Nymo, but if she thought calmly about it, Nymo's death was truly not Lexa's fault.

Lexa remained kneeling in front of Marie, the child's arms slung around her neck and her face pressed against her throat, for long silent moments. She could feel that the child was unmistakably crying, her small frame shuddering in her arms and she felt her tears against the skin of her throat as well.

She knew that the funeral rites for Nymo would be starting in less than two candle marks and for the sake of the remaining nightblood children, she would have to appear strong and unwavering in front of them.

"It is not your fault that Nymo died" she intoned in a strong voice, as she pried the girl's arms from her neck and backed off slightly. Lexa stood back up again, keeping the child's hand within her own and pulling her towards on of the armchairs. She sat down and tugged at Marie lightly to prompt her to climb into her lap.

"It is not yours either" Marie retorted seriously. Her face was pale and grey eyes looked red and puffy.

Lexa was caught off guard slightly by the girl's rational acceptance of her friend's death. In her opinion Marie had more of a reason to be angry with her on Nymo's behalf, than Clarke had had. As soon as her thoughts strayed to Clarke, she banished them from her mind forcefully.

"Clarke is wrong…" Marie said, when Lexa had not reacted verbally after a moment "…you care for all of them".

Lexa gave the girl a shaky smile. Clarke would forever be slightly righteous in her anger about her betrayal at the Mountain, the blonde had understood on a political level, but her heart would obviously never understand and truly forgive it. Lexa feared that this would forever be hanging between them.

"I do" she agreed, voice tinted with regret. She would not be feeling for the nightbloods' deaths in such a fashion, if she had not cared for them. She had felt for Skykru at the foot of the Mountain as well, but it had been the only sensible decision she could have made at the time.

Lexa had her hands lying on Marie's back, securing the girl in her place, before she could fall down backwards from the armchair. Clarke was right on one point, she loved Marie deeply and because of her love for the child she had elevated her life, but that would remain that way.

"I am sorry…" Marie repeated lowly, as she leaned forward, letting her cheek rest comfortably on the commander's chest. It was obvious that Lexa was hurting, her green eyes were filled with deep sadness and Marie had no idea on how to make it better. If it would have been a bleeding wound, she could have sealed it with her power, but she could not do anything now. She was angry at Clarke for hurting the woman in such a fashion. Clarke had promised to her that she had no intention of ever hurting Lexa in any way and yet, she just had. So, Lexa was not just grieving for the loss of another of her nightblood children, but also being hurt by the one she loved.

"For what?" Lexa asked after a beat of silence. One of her hands rested on the back of the girl's head, while the other caressed over her back softly. She had expected to have to comfort the child, expecting her to grief for Nymo's death as both children had been connected by a friendship, but Marie appeared more compassionate than anything else at the moment.

"That Clarke said those things" Marie answered, a pout on her lips, as she tilted her head slightly to look up at the commander "I love you, Mommy, and you are anything but weak".

Lexa snorted slightly under her breath, surprised yet again by the girl's sudden maturity. "I love you too, my little star" she reassured the child easily, there was no doubt in her mind about that, it was simply a fact at this time now.

She would not question her own strength because of what Clarke had said, Clarke had been angry and the blonde healer had a way to push her in ways, no one else was able to, that was why they had instantly felt connected and attracted to each other. While she did not think that her love for Marie could be a weakness, her feelings for Clarke could very well turn into a weakness. They would forever be each other's strength and weakness. Only Clarke was able to push her so far, that she lost hold of her calm façade.

She had to think about the impending war now, she could not afford to be distracted by Clarke then. Lexa steeled herself, she could forgive the blonde woman for being angry, she could understand that she had been deeply affected by Nymo's death. Her big heart, compassion and fiery protectiveness were a few of the things she admired deeply about the Skykru healer.

The fact that Clarke had used the Mountain to make her feel guilty, might have hurt at the moment, but the move had been expected and Lexa was fairly certain that they would never truly be able to forget this. She had betrayed Clarke in that night and she would forever take the blame for it.

But including Marie like that, using her love for the girl against herself, was nothing Lexa could forgive just like that. Clarke had gone too far there, stepped over an invisible boundary. The blonde woman had been privy to many aspects of the commander's life, that no one else would have been allowed to. Right now, they had been within her quarters, alone and in private. But Lexa was not certain that the fight would have played out any differently in the streets of Polis, the throne room or even on the way towards Ice Nation. Clarke's hot-headedness was a danger, if the woman did not learn to mind her tongue.

She was unwilling to speak to Clarke right now. She may have appeared calm during their fight, but Lexa wanted to contemplate what had been said in private.

The next days she would mostly be busy with finalizing their plans to start their march. Before leaving Polis for possibly several weeks, she needed to take some time and spent it with the remaining nightbloods as well. A lot still needed to be organized about how to be handled in her absence as well. The last days before a battle were rarely lazy at all and Marie would still need as many quite and private moments with Anya and her, as Lexa could possibly arrange. The child was clearly improving, but Lexa doubted that Marie was truly well again just yet.

They spent long moments in silence, simply embracing each other, both lost in their own thoughts.

Anya's return broke the silence finally.

Lexa was mildly surprised that the general had came alone, if Clarke was anything, she was stubborn and she doubted that she would have run out of arguments yet.

Marie smiled faintly at the woman in mute greeting, not moving an inch from her spot in Lexa's lap.

Anya's face softened immediately at the sight. Lexa looked calmer again as well, but her gaze still showed her sorrow.

"Where is Clarke?" Lexa asked in a guarded tone. She highly doubted that Anya would have physically retaliated against the blonde woman and she could not spot on her knuckles either.

"In her assigned room" Anya answered easily and she rolled her eyes before she added "Probably grovelling in guilt by now".

Lexa raised a brow minutely, but shook her head again immediately. "The funeral rites will begin soon" she proclaimed, gently nudging Marie to ease out of her lap.

The girl pouted visibly and her shoulders sagged. The funeral rites before had already been long and exhausting, having to face this again in such a short amount of time simply hurt. She reluctantly climbed out of Lexa's lap, only when Anya stepped closer and offered a hand to help her up. "I don't wanna go…" she whined, eyes shining with tears again.

Anya sighed under her breath, while Lexa stood up again, shaking out her tingling legs quickly.

The commander needed to wipe off her war paint from her face, it had still been in place after the war meeting, but the funeral rites of a nightblood was no place to wear war paint.

Anya squeezed the child's shoulders. Marie was not necessarily required to be present, but she had been a friend to Nymo and she knew that the girl would probably regret not going later if she remained behind now. "You will manage" she reassured the child in a calm tone.

Marie scowled slightly, before her expression fell again "I don't want to have to attend more funeral rites…" she trailed off when a throat lodged itself into her throat.

Anya frowned slightly. She had already been present at endless numbers of pyres to burn fallen comrades. Death in battle was usually what ended a warrior's duty in the army and there had always been war somewhere. She did not know if telling the girl that she would get used to the sight, was a good idea at this point, she doubted that Marie would find the reassurance helpful at the moment.

"You do not need to attend, if you do not want to" Lexa proclaimed, wiping over her face with a wet washcloth, wiping away the black war paint.

Marie shook her head "No, he was my friend" she said "I wanna be there now, but…" she trailed off again.

"But what?" Anya asked, looking down at the girl quizzingly in confusion.

"We will go to war soon" Marie proclaimed, twisting the hem of her shirt in her fingers.

Anya inclined her head in mute agreement, Lexa had turned around to face Marie as well.

Marie asked faintly, voice shaking strongly, while she voiced her worse fear and her grey eyes flitting between both of them, widened and filled with tears again "How do you know that there will not be a pyre for one or both of you?"

Chapter 209

Anya looked down at the girl with compassionate eyes, after banding a short glance with Lexa. It should surprise neither of them that Marie was afraid of loosing one of them, the girl cared as much for them as they loved her after all. Anya did not wish to imagine how deep Marie's grief would be, would one of them truly not survive this war, but neither of them could honestly promise that nothing would be happening to one of them either.

The war would start in their favour, they would outnumber the Ice Nation soldiers greatly. With Ontari and Roan both on their side, they now had much more knowledge of the land and where exactly Nia's fortress was located. Ontari had even been able to supply the commander with information regarding emergency plans if it came to a siege. The blockade around the borders of Azgeda had been in place for long enough to that the commander was convinced that the population of Ice Nation would already be in the process of starving. Both, Ontari and Roan, agreed to that fact, but had also cautiously pointed out that Nia would have called for all the remaining resources to be brought to her own fortress, not caring in the slightest if her people starved, as long as she and her soldiers were still able to sustain themselves.

But even with these positive preconditions, Lexa was certain that Nia would still have surprises hidden somewhere and she would not be foolish enough to assume that the woman would give up her throne willingly without a fight.

"You know very well, that neither of us can promise to you to survive this war, Marie" Lexa answered the girl's question in a calm but heavy tone. She was reminded of the girl's fear in the wake of the Mountain in this moment, back then she had also not lied to the girl either. She stepped closer to the girl and gently wiped the tears from her cheeks. "We are planning this war ahead as well as possible, but anything can happen during a war. Neither of us wish to leave you behind anytime soon, Marie, but just like you cannot promise to survive, we cannot as well" Lexa explained to the child.

Marie nodded in acknowledgement, but her expression still looked miserable.

Lexa enveloped the girl in her arms for a few silent moments, before she squeezed her shoulder "It is time to go" she proclaimed in a low tone.

Marie backed off from the commander with sadness etched into her features, she understood that Lexa now needed to appear in her function and could not let her remain this close. So, she stepped closer to Anya instead and was internally relieved, when the general immediately put an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into a sort of one-armed hug. Marie watched on in silence, how Lexa took up the shoulder pauldron of the commander, fasting it around her body and last adjusting the red sash as well. She felt incredibly sorry for the woman, as she watched Lexa's grief disappear behind the calm and stoic façade of the commander, but she knew that there was nothing she could do at the moment for Lexa.

Anya's hand remained on her back the whole way to the elevator and to the floor of the conclave.

Marie's breath hitched when she immediately spotted Nymo's body on a table, hidden beneath a bright piece of cloths. Flowers and candles were arranged around his body already and Titus just stepped back from his body, fingers dipped in a black liquid. Marie did not care to wonder if it was black paint or actually some of Nymo's blood.

Marie spotted Ontari standing a little away from Aden and Saria, the three youngest nightblood children stood between the two, holding onto each other, while Boo and Kyla both held a hand of Saria and Aden. She frowned slightly, Ontari still stood isolated and awkward from the others.

Marie felt Anya giving her shoulder a squeeze, like during the previous funeral rites, Anya would have to stand in the back, while she herself could join the other nightbloods. She would have preferred to follow Lexa, who immediately walked up to Titus, but she knew that she would not be allowed there at the moment.

She looked up at Anya for a moment, before she followed her slight nudge to move towards the other nightblood children. Without being prompted to, Marie stepped up to Ontari, slightly leaning against the older girl immediately.

Ontari looked down at Marie with a slight frown, while she let her uninjured arm wind itself around the younger girl, pulling her even closer to herself. She was internally grateful that Marie was with her now, she had not been particularly close to Nymo either. The only one of the nightbloods she was now at least a little connected to was maybe Aden. But the blonde boy had been swarmed by the younger nightblood children immediately upon his entry to the room and Ontari had taken a step back from him, isolating herself again. Although the younger ones had not looked at her as distrustfully as before, Ontari knew that she was not welcome among them at the moment either. She had been unable to decipher June's gaze, when they had looked at each other briefly.

She tightened her arm around Marie, when she felt the younger girl begin to cry, as soon as Titus spoke up, praising Nymo's strength. Marie's sobs were low, but she could feel her body shaking against herself.

Ontari knew that Marie had been friends with Nymo right from the start, the younger girl had told her so previously. So, it was no wonder that she grieved for his death.

She frowned slightly, when she looked over at the other nightbloods. Three of them way too young to be able to become commander in the immediate future. June was also still a little young to make a good leader, which only left herself and Aden as the only possible successors. Ontari truly hoped that there would not be a conclave too soon, as both of them were wounded, they would really make a pathetic conclave. She could not understand anymore, why she had been convinced a few months ago, to be ready to become the next commander; she knew better now and internally hoped that Lexa would remain in her position for longer.

The funeral rites seemed to stretch endlessly to Marie. She barely noticed when Titus stopped talking, only for Lexa to say some more words, none of them registered clearly in her mind at the moment. She blindly followed Ontari's light nudge to get moving, when it was time to move out of the tower and to truly burn Nyno's body.

Marie hoped that she would not have to see more funeral rites like this, in her mind, she could see Lexa, Anya and Ontari lying on the pyre instead of Nymo's smaller body. She knew that Lexa was right though, there was no way of predicting the future. She might be able to cheat fate and heal the three, if they were gravely wounded during the war. Marie realized that she would have stay close to all three of them, to be able to heal them, if needed. She knew that all three of them were great fighters, but Marie feared what the queen would still be able to do, even if her own troops were truly outnumbered so greatly. She could not remember seeing the queen actually fighting during her time in her fortress, but she knew without a doubt that the queen would have some hidden attacks at the ready.

She watched on, mind weirdly numb, how Lexa lit Nymo's pyre in front of the basement of the tower. Marie barely registered just how crowded the place in front of the pyre was and she did not really notice how Lexa told the crowd that troops had already been sent this very day to avenge the fallen nightbloods, bringing an end to the bandits once and for all.

She blinked up at Anya, when the woman suddenly appeared behind them; she again had stood lightly leaned against Ontari's frame.

Anya had watched the girl carefully during the previous hours, it had teared painfully at her heart to have to watch the suffering of the child without anything she could do to truly comfort her. She had also seen right through Lexa's impassive mask, although her previous second's face had appeared to be carved out of stone, her green eyes were clouded with sorrow, grief and guilt.

She spotted Clarke in the front of the crowd and Marie felt a flash of anger course through her mind at her sight. The blonde woman did not appear angry any longer and her blue-eyed gaze was not fixed at the nearly burnt pyre, but rather on Lexa, although Marie could see that the commander was not looking back at her at all.

It was starting to turn dark around them and Marie lowly asked "Can we go inside again?" towards Anya, tilting her head upwards to look at the general. She felt tired all of a sudden and she just now realized that she was shivering, although Marie could not detect feeling particularly cold.

Anya nodded in agreement, motioning Ontari to come as well. The pyre had burnt down far enough, that their attendance was not mandatory any longer and the especially the nightblood girl looked paler, than she had liked. She had not had the opportunity yet, to inquire if her stitches had been ripped previously. It had been obvious that Marie had been far away with her thoughts, not reacting to anything said or shouted around her, maybe only anchored to the presence by her contact to Ontari.

She knew that the commander would join them later, Lexa would wait until the pyre had burnt down to glowing embers and Anya could only imagine what was going on in pervious second's mind. She still felt that she had somehow failed Tris and the loss resurfaced from time to time. Lexa now had lost five of the nightblood children, which had grown up under her tutelage and the guilt of that would surely be weighing heavily on her conscience as well.

Anya glanced down from the podium at Clarke minutely, when she noticed the brief anger flash through Marie's grey eyes and her own lips thinned in irritation. The blonde healer should be standing beside Lexa now, but due to her own stupidity, both women were once again at odds and Anya had no idea how long it might take until they found their way back together. Lexa could be stubborn if she wanted and Anya sensed that the commander would be unwilling to forgive Clarke right at this moment, focusing on the upcoming war instead. If Clarke was somehow the cause of Lexa's mind being elsewhere during the war, Anya vowed to herself to rip the Skykru woman apart with her bare hands in retaliation.

She guided both girls into back the direction of the tower in silence, catching Lexa's gaze in passing. The commander's green eyes were stormy with suppressed emotions, but there was no visible crack in her façade otherwise and no one who did not know Lexa closely, would be able to tell the difference anyway. Anya had always tried to instil into Lexa early from her training that showing her emotions on her face was a weakness and a weakness which could easily lead to her death in battle, but it was almost scarily how Lexa had perfected this skill, being much better at hiding her emotions now than Anya herself had ever been.

Ontari was looking forward to return to their quarters, although she had the gnawing suspicion that they were not on their way to their own quarters but to the commander's quarters. She had of course also noticed that Marie had slept much calmer during the last night, she did not really understand it why Marie could draw such measures of comfort from the combined presence of the general and the commander, but she could not deny the effects either.

During her arrival at the rooms in which the healers in the tower treated their patients, Ontari had been seen to by Laurel herself and to her utmost displeasure the old woman had to have to redo at least part of the stitches. The woman had scolded her the whole time for her carelessness, telling her quiet frankly that the wound would surely never heal if she did not take better care of herself. Ontari had tried in vain to defend herself, only prolonging the healer's rant as an effect and she had the pressing suspicion that the tea, the healer had made her drink in the end, had somehow been tempered with to taste extra foully as well. Whatever exactly the tea had contained, had made a sense of numbness spread through her body and during the last part of the funeral rites, Ontari had begun to feel extremely sleepy, she had feared to collapse soon, right before the general had finally made her way over to them.

So, Ontari was truly relieved that they would finally return inside, she would not be picky at the moment about where she was told to sleep either. The couch within the commander's quarters was comfy enough as well and if it helped Marie, Ontari would be willing to have to sleep on it for a while. She somehow doubted that offering to the general to sleep on her own in their actual shared quarters would go over too well. Ontari still did not really understand why the general was so insistent on the fact that they needed to share a sleeping space at all. To her knowledge such a thing was not done in Ice Nation at all. All seconds would share a room in Nia's fortress and on journeys the seconds were usually the ones who had to sleep in the least comfortable tents, if they were given one at all, no matter how young they were. Although now, that she thought about it, Ontari could not remember that seconds in Azgeda were under the age of ten summers at all. In the queen's fortress, the children had been educated together by the royal guard up to this point and only if they had proven their worth so far, they were considered to be assigned a first after their tenth summer. She remembered with a slight grimace, just how many children she had seen fail at the training with the loyal guard.

She blinked slightly, when Marie squeezed her hand and she wondered why the child's grey eyes seemed worried. Ontari looked over to the general and noticed that she had somehow not truly noticed that they had already arrived in the commander's quarters at all, the general's brown eyes were focused on her expectantly, she must have missed her questioning her on something.

Ontari looked right back at the Trikru woman for long moments and when it became apparent that Anya would not repeat her question without being prompted, she huffed lightly under her breath, before she forcefully pushed the annoyance from her mind "I am sorry…" she said, voice a little hesitant and the hint of a grimace pulling at her features "I must have missed your question…".

Anya pursed her lips and worry visibly flashed through her brown eyes, both of her charges seemed preoccupied with their own thoughts, but Ontari still looked much too pale to be considered healthy. She was positively surprised that the nightblood girl now seemed compliant again. During the morning and her attempt at helping the girl get ready, Ontari had well known how to test her nerves.

"I wanted to know what the healers have said" she repeated her original inquiry in a sharp tone, watching the girl's antics intently.

From the corner of her eyes, Anya could see that Marie had sat down on the floor in front of the fire place, where Risha had been sleeping. Her expression softened a fraction, when the child seemed to curl herself around the sleeping wolf, Risha woke up briefly, huffed at her human and only placed her muzzle between the girl's arms. She highly doubted that the floor was a place for Marie to rest on, but she would leave the child be for the moment.

Ontari sighed tiredly "Laurel redid some of the stitches" she informed the general truthfully. There was no sense in lying about it anyway, the general could simply ask the healer in person and hear about it as well. She knew that with every day of her wounds not beginning to heal, the time for them to truly close would just extent. The nightblood flowing through her veins gave her an advantage on that point, she would probably not have survived the infection after the stabbing wound with normal blood all those months ago, but they needed to begin to close first, before her quicker healing could take effect.

Anya frowned at the information, but nodded in agreement. "You shall have to rest until the army begins its march" she proclaimed in a decisive tone. If the girl's wounds did not begin to close, she could not allow her to accompany them and both Lexa and she had agreed that Ontari's knowledge of Nia's fortress could truly be helpful, it would probably be impossible for the girl to tell them every little detail beforehand.

Ontari grimaced at the prospect, she could already imagine what the general meant by "resting", she would probably be confined to a bed, forced to sit idle. "How long until we leave Polis?" she asked, hope hinting in her tone, maybe her time of confinement would not be too long.

"It is not settled yet" Anya answered easily, discarding her coat "it should not be longer than a week though".

Ontari nodded, her grimace deepening slightly. A week could stretch awfully long, if she truly had to spent it solely resting. She was also not really used to the concept of being forced to rest, Nia had usually forced her back to her feet as soon as she could remain standing after a more severe injury. Despite already assuming that the general would deny her idea, Ontari said "I can sleep in our…", but she was stopped midsentence.

"You shall sleep on the couch again" Anya interrupted the nightblood girl in a sharp tone and her eyes had gotten harder again, she would not argue about their sleeping arrangement with the girl right now.

Ontari closed her mouth with an audible snap and rolled her eyes slightly, but she nodded in mute acknowledgement. She rolled her eyes again, when Anya stepped closer to her and immediately began opening her coat for her; Laurel had closed it over her bandaged arm before and Ontari would not have been able to open it without assistance.

She sat down on the couch, when Anya gave her uninjured shoulder a slight shove and bit her lip to keep silent when the general immediately opened and removed her boots as well. Ontari truly already hated needing this form of assistance with a passion. She minutely tried picturing Nia with her in the same situation, but shook the image of Nia crouched in front of her, instead of Anya doing it now, from her mind quickly. The idea was simply absurd, Nia would never have helped her in such a fashion at all. She would surely have been punished for being this injured at all and being caused by rouge bandits to top it off.

"Thank you" she offered, almost meekly, when the general stood up again.

Anya acknowledged the girl's gratitude with a curt nod, scrutinizing her for a moment, before she changed her mind and said "You are my second now, Ontari, being a first to someone is not just about intoning combat skills and battle strategies. But rather about providing a trusting environment to learn as well" she had chosen her words carefully. She would have worded them differently, if she had addressed Marie, but she would not label the growing relationship to Ontari with anything resembling a "family" just yet, but Anya could not deny that their bond would surely change in the future.

Ontari nodded with a contemplative expression, caught a little off guard by the general's words. She was still surprised that the general was taking this whole first and second thing so seriously. In the beginning she had assumed, that Lexa had made this a precondition to let her survive at all, but somehow, she was not so convinced of that assumption any longer. She knew that she still hesitated to truly trust the general, but she could not deny that the Trikru was making an effort. Maybe, Ontari mused, she would be required to make an effort as well and not just for Marie's sake, but for her own as well.

Chapter 210

On the way back inside of the tower, Lexa could already sense Clarke trying to follow her. She ignored the blonde woman's presence behind herself until they had reached the inside of the tower. Lexa only turned around in front of the elevator door, motioning Gustus and Ryder to precede herself into the elevator. When she faced Clarke, her expression was as blank as she could force it to be at the moment.

"What is it you wish to throw at me now?" Lexa asked, clasping her hands behind her back and standing straighter again. She felt the exhaustion of the day pulling at her mind and she wished to curl into her bed, hopefully trying to ban what had happened today from it forever.

Clarke visibly winced at the commander's question, but she did not show otherwise that the other woman's words might have hurt her. "I am sorry..." she began, blue eyes honest, but her gaze darted above Lexa's shoulder towards the two guards waiting up on their leader. Both of them were glaring daggers at her and Clarke realized that she had not just destroyed some part of the trust between herself and Lexa during their fight, but had probably also lost the respect of those around the commander. She grimaced lightly, wondering just how Marie would react the next time they saw each other, the girl had listened to the fight after all and had not really been trusting of her before. She had the gnawing suspicion that Lexa would truly favour Marie's wellbeing now if she had to choose between their relationship and Marie and Clarke knew that she was the only one to blame for that.

Something flashed through Lexa's green eyes as anger flitted over her features minutely, before they blanked again and her tone carried a bitter hint of acceptance "You have more than plainly stated your mind, Clarke, leave me be for tonight". Lexa felt tired and she knew that she had no energy left to fight with the blonde, her heart ached a little at the hurt which now visibly shown in Clarke's blue eyes, but Lexa steeled her resolve. She turned on her heels, not giving the other woman a chance to say more, joining Gustus and Ryder in the elevator a second later.

When the door to the elevator closed, Lexa could hear Clarke calling out her name with a deep desperation underlying her tone and the tears which showed in her blue eyes, were like another physical punch to Lexa, but she breathed easier again once the doors had closed again and the elevator began to ascend upwards.

Clarke watched Lexa leave with a sob caught in her throat. She had seen with her own eyes how much she must have hurt the stoic leader, her expression might have been calm and controlled, but her green eyes had given away the sorrow and resignation clouding the commander's mind. She felt her shoulders drop in failure, she knew that trying to follow Lexa into her quarters now would be pointless, she would not he granted excess and neither could she force herself into Lexa's presence right now. The woman's request to be left alone for the night resonated loudly through the night and Clarke realized that Lexa seemed to expect their fight to continue. A single tear ran down her face as she swallowed down her frustration and resigned herself to at least respect Lexa's wish for now.

Lexa felt slightly better immediately once she stepped foot back into her quarters. She was not surprised to see Ontari and Anya sitting on the couch, while the nightblood girl looked close to falling asleep already. She felt her heart warm, spotting Marie lying on the floor curled together with Risha. The child's fingers were carding through the wolf's fur and her gaze was fixed on the dancing flames in front of her.

She quickly divested herself of the pieces of clothing signalling her station as the commander.

"I half expected Clarke on your heels…" Anya commented, the hint of a tease in her tone.

Lexa shot the older woman a scathing glare. She was well aware that Anya had never taken a real liking to Clarke and her former mentor was still so very protective of her, it would probably be amusing to see if she were not the commander. Lexa had no idea how to proceed with Clarke from this point on. A surge of fear flashed through Lexa's mind at the realization how her last fight with Costia had played out, the scout had left Polis without her knowledge and against her strict orders, only to return in pieces to her bed.

Marie looked up from her place on the floor, when Anya spoke up. Her grey eyes narrowed at the woman at the mention of Clarke "She's not coming tonight, right?" she asked, voice underlined with definite hostility. Seeing Clarke was the last thing Marie wished to do right now. She stood up from the floor again, giving the commander a perfect innocent look, as she climbed into the armchair with the woman.

Lexa smiled softly at the girl, as her arms immediately curled around the child's body, pulling her closer to herself and securing her in place. She let one hand caress over the girl's back gently, when she felt Marie nestling her face into the croak of her neck.

"No, Clarke will not be here tonight" Lexa assured Marie in a calm tone. The hostility flashing through Marie's grey eyes momentarily, alarmed Lexa slightly. She knew that the child had still not truly warmed to Clarke and witnessing their fight would surely not have helped that.

Marie nodded, slightly relieved at the confirmation, making herself more comfortable in Lexa's arms.

The commander looked down at the child with a gentle expression, before she glanced over at Ontari. It was obvious that the older girl was extremely tired as well at the moment, they should all turn in for the night soon.

"Have your wounds been cared for yet?" she asked the girl in a kind tone. She knew well enough that it would not take long for Marie to doze off in this position and it was easier to take care of the wounds on her collarbone, if she could still stand upright.

Marie shook her head in the negative, a frown pulling at her lips. She knew what Lexa had intended with her question and she took hold of the commander's shirt, burrowing herself more firmly against her body, with a light whine.

Lexa smirked slightly in amusement at the girl's antics, while she could see Anya narrowing her brown eyes at the child. She shook her head subtly at the general, standing up from the armchair with Marie still in her arms. "We shall do so now then" she proclaimed and laughed under her breath when the child whined lightly again in clear protest.

"Do you need anything else?" Anya addressed Ontari in a kind tone, watching Lexa carrying Marie into the bathroom.

Ontari shook her head in the negative mutely, jawing deeply a second later.

Anya inclined her head in acknowledgement "Rest then" she retorted and added a curt "Good night", as she stood up from the sofa as well, heading over to the commander's bed.

Marie only reluctantly let go of Lexa, when the commander urged her too, only letting go completely, when the woman's voice turned slightly sharper. She looked up at the woman with a slight pout "The skin does not itch really" she began to argue. Getting the bandages changed over the chunks of skin, she had cut away, hurt, when the bandages pulled at the wounds.

Lexa sighed under her breath "We do not want the wounds to get infected now, Marie" she tried to reason with the girl.

Marie's pout deepened "It feels fine, really" she argued right back.

Lexa's expression turned a little impatient and staring the girl down for a moment, was enough for her pout to melt away and Marie stripped out of her shirt without being prompted to, a flash of an apology passing over her features momentarily. She tried to be cautious when she removed the bandage from the girl's upper body and Lexa carefully inspected the shallow wounds.

Marie seemed correct in her assessment, there was no sign of an insetting infection and the wounds were truly beginning to close, there was not much of a seepage any longer as well.

Marie stood still, while Lexa gently applied the disinfecting ointment to the wounded skin and she barely felt any pain from it any longer, getting the kill marks burnt into her skin had truly hurt much more and the pain had been lasting as well, as no one had taken care of the wounds in the queen's fortress. She was glad that it was in fact Lexa taking care of her and not Clarke, who had mostly done so previously.

Her brows scrunched together as she thought of Clarke again "She lied…" she proclaimed in a tone laced deeply with accusation.

Lexa minutely paused in her administration, green eyes flicking to the girl's face shortly, unsure to who Marie was eluding to at the moment and she raised a brow in silent question at the girl.

Marie scowled when she bit out "I mean Clarke…" her grey eyes darkened slightly "she had promised that she would do nothing to hurt you…" she looked at the commander with a frown.

Lexa was minutely caught off guard by what she assumed to be disappointment and maybe protectiveness emitting from the blonde girl.

"…but she did!" Marie added, voice rising at the end in obvious agitation and her hands balled into fists at her side.

Lexa shook her head slightly, as she grasped onto Marie's hands. "Marie, listen to me" she urged the upset child, waiting until their gazes connected again "Clarke and I fought, yes, and she did say things that she should not have, especially in front of you, Marie, things which have indeed hurt me. But this fight does not concern you".

Marie frowned visibly, but nodded her head with a slightly confused expression. "But she was mean to you…" she tried to argue further, tugging at her hands in order to cross her arms over her chest and her pout deepened again, when the woman still held onto her hands, not letting go of them.

Lexa looked down at Marie trying to hold on to at least a slightly strict expression. Right at this moment, Marie truly looked like the girl of only ten summers, she still was. Body skinny and bruised, grey eyes big and confused and a petulant pout on her lips, trying to argue with her, as if she knew better. "I appreciate your worry, Marie, but it is not your place to fight my battles" Lexa addressed the girl intently "I will handle Clarke, Marie, and I do not want to hear you trying to do something on my behalf" she tightened her grip on the girl's hands slightly, waiting for her to nod in agreement. It was obvious that Marie was reluctant to agree, but she finally nodded.

Marie contemplated Lexa's words in silence, while she stood obediently still when the commander applied a new bandage around her upper body. She frowned again, when she remembered that Lexa and Anya both had reassured her repeatedly that they would still love her and forgive her, not matter what she would do in the future, wondering if it would be the same between Lexa and Clarke. She did not know if there was a difference in the love between two adults and the love between parents and children.

"Lexa?" Marie addressed the commander, voice slightly hesitant.

"Yes" Lexa immediately reacted, washing her hands clean of the ointment and waiting for the child to state what was obviously still troubling her mind.

"Do you still love Clarke?" Marie asked bluntly, honestly curious.

Lexa sighed under her breath lightly, a little annoyed at the fact that Marie's mind had obviously chosen to focus on the conflict between herself and Clarke, probably in an attempt not to have to consider Nymo's death at all. She inclined her head after a moment of hesitation. Clarke had deeply hurt her with her accusations, but she still felt the same about the fierce blonde healer.

Marie's brows creased together slightly. "Will you forgive her?" she questioned next, tilting her head to the side slightly as she did so, staring intently at the brunette woman.

Lexa's lips thinned for the fraction of a second, as she contemplated a fitting answer. "I shall see" she finally answered vaguely "I have the upcoming war to focus on, I cannot afford to be distracted now" she knew that her tone had darkened noticeably, when she watched the frown deepening on Marie's face.

"Do you love me and Clarke in the same way?" Marie asked after a short beat of silence. Internally Marie wondered what would happen, if she truly hurt Lexa ever in such a fashion, not that she intended to do so.

Lexa frowned slightly for a moment, her first instinct had been to agree to the question, but she realized immediately that the girl's question might be carrying a deeper meaning behind it. She tried to push the annoyance from her mind and solely focused on Marie, only grateful that the child was asking her these loaded questions now in total privacy.

She handed Marie a clean shirt, giving herself another short moment to contemplate on how to proceed. "What is really troubling your mind, Marie?" Lexa finally directly diverted the girl's question, once Marie had dressed herself again.

"I have hurt you as well…" Marie retorted with the hint of a whine in her tone. She remembered now how cautious and guarded Lexa had been around her, when she had still been missing her own memories and had not recognized the woman any longer. She had been sent to the capitol to kill the commander and she had nearly done so, even before that. So, she had not just hurt the woman with her words, but had truly physically hurt her before as well. But Lexa still said that she loved her and that there was nothing to forgive, so she now could not spot the difference.

Lexa sighed under her breath, when she realized what Marie must actually be meaning at all. She crouched down in front of the girl again, bringing them back onto the same level. "You do not understand why I do not intent to forgive Clarke easily, while I treat you differently?" she asked, just to make sure that she truly had understood the child correctly.

Marie nodded in mute agreement immediately, fearing that she could also easily lose the woman's love if she did something wrong.

Lexa smiled gently at the child, when she spotted a flash of fear pass over the girl's features and she squeezed the girl's shoulders reassuringly "There is absolutely no need for you to fear that my feelings for you will ever change, Marie, in this sense there is a difference between what I feel for you and for Clarke" she huffed lightly, feeling that her eloquence was failing her at this moment.

She thought for a little moment, before she asked "Would your mother have ever stopped loving you?" Lexa kept her tone gentle and looked intently at the girl.

Marie immediately shook her head in the negative, no doubt about the answer in her mind.

Although Lexa felt a little frustrated that Marie obviously still was not as sure of her love for her as she would have liked, she kept her expression kind "It is the same now between you and me and Anya" Lexa proclaimed in a firm tone. She had purposefully included Anya in the statement. Anya might still sometimes retain a certain act of indifference, but the little conflict between her and Marie had shown Lexa easily that her former mentor felt the same. Anya might also sometimes need a little time to cool off, but it would not change the depths of her feelings for the child no matter what.

Marie's lips tilted up in a smile, as her grey eyes connected with Lexa's green orbs for long moments. She stepped closer to the woman, so that she could hug her firmly, Lexa had still been crouching in front of her.

Lexa responded to the girl's hug and wound her own arms around the girl, picking her up a moment later without any prewarning, prompting a little startled giggle from the child's lips. "It is bedtime now" she proclaimed kindly.

"I am not tired yet" Marie immediately retorted, a pout taking up residence on her face again.

Lexa snorted lightly under her breath, knowing for certain that the girl would fall asleep only a few moments after going to bed, if she or Anya joined her. She carried Marie over into the main room of her quarter's, spotting Ontari already asleep on the couch, while Anya had turned her head in their direction, obviously still awake.

A frown rested on Anya's features and Lexa guessed that the older woman had probably been wondering what might have taken them so long. She only mutely inclined her head towards her former mentor, they could talk in the morning as well.

"I am really not tired yet" Marie repeated, when Lexa placed her onto the bed, nudging her into Anya's direction mutely.

Lexa shook her head at the girl, a mixture of fondness and amusement dancing through her eyes at the girl's antics.

Anya's lips thinned visibly at Marie's childish antics. On the one hand she was infinitely relieved to note that Marie's behaviour was finally normalizing itself, not through the whole day yet, but the glimpses of the girl's original character peeking through were getting more frequently and lasted longer; on the other hand the girl was now again starting to test out her limits and Lexa and she obviously disagreed quiet strongly on which rules to set for the child.

"You have nearly been asleep on the floor before" she pointed out, voice tinted with clear impatience.

Marie winced slightly at the general's words and when she felt her brown eyes resting heavily on her, she scooted closer to the woman, mutely cuddling up to her, while Lexa was still occupied with changing her clothes to her sleeping attire.

Anya's expression softened visibly and she felt her irritation melt away in seconds, as she tightened an arm around the child's smaller body, letting one hand card through her blonde hair soothingly.

"Not tired…" she commented sarcastically, when she felt the child's body relaxing in her arms already, even before Lexa joined them in the bed.

Lexa smiled fondly at both of them, when she also slipped beneath the furs. She knew that the next days would remain hectic and stressful until the army would finally begin its march. She expected that the troops, she had sent out this day to take care of the bandits, would return in around two to three days, calculating two more days for them to rest again, could mean that they could potentially leave Polis in around five days. She knew that the Skykru delegation who would join the army, would arrive the day after tomorrow and Lexa hoped that the integration of them into the rest of the army would work out better than she anticipated. Clarke and Monty had both reassured her that the soldiers had been chosen carefully from Skykru, but Lexa still expected the worse; were it not for the clear advantage their firearms gave to them, she would have disagreed to take them with the rest of the army at all.

Her eyes opened again completely, when she noticed a slight golden shine in front of her. Lexa watched on with a frown, how Anya tensed, pain flashing over her features, while Marie's hands seemed to glow shortly. Anya had suffered a few superficial wounds during the training session and Marie was obviously healing them.

Both of them bandied a worried glance, when Marie's hands stopped to glow and the girl had just fallen asleep like that. Had the child just healed Anya's wounds without even consciously choosing to do so?