Remy was pulsing the chocolate chip ice cream, Irish cream, coffee, and a high dollar clear rum in the blender. Who needs milk when you have Irish cream? He killed the whole bottle making them for 4 people though. He won't have enough for his coffee in the morning. He'd just have to rely on an ass-ton of sugar tomorrow.
"You're sure things will be okay if you just… stay here, Logan?" Patton asked carefully.
"My father is not Remy's- Sorry Remy-" Logan said. Remy shrugged. "He'll be mad and I'll be grounded, but if I can keep my grades up, I'll be ungrounded in a few weeks. And they will not slip from spending time with my friends on a Friday night," Logan said. Remy was happy to host this repressed nerd. It was his last time being a party friend, after all. He would enjoy watching these two non-drinkers meet their drunk selves and make bad choices.
"Alright babes, you're both not drinker-drinkers, so have a glass of water for every few shots and don't even start the milkshakes until after your second slice of pizza," Remy said as he stopped the blender.
"Already had three!" Patton piped up excitedly.
"I am eating the second slice now," Logan supplied. Remy poured out the last milkshake for himself and took a long, tasty-tasty sip. Roman had already put a decent dent in his, too.
"So what do you guys want to do tonight?" Roman asked, starting another piece of pizza.
"I enjoy Mario Kart," Logan supplied, making Remy laugh. He was obsessed. Remy hoped Logan's dad would forgive him quickly and get him a switch or something.
"V's fine with us doing whatever as long as the cops aren't called," Remy said.
"That… can't be where the bar is," Logan deadpanned. Remy laughed again.
"And yet here we are. I think Remus left a BB gun here," Remy mused, trying to think of where it is. Probably somewhere in Virgil's room?
"We are not drinking and playing with firearms, Remy!" Patton shot angrily, glaring at Remy.
"Okay, okay, jeez!" Remy rolled his eyes and held up his hand in defeat. What a worrywart.
"'I never' is always great for parties," Roman offered, grinning at Remy.
"Yeah, but then you'll find out all my dirty little secrets," Remy said, sipping his milkshake. "I'm not playing,"
"No, let's do something everyone wants to do," Patton said.
"Spin the bottle?" Remy smirked. Roman blew a kiss to him flirtatiously, but the other two went beat-red. "I'm kidding, I know you nerds are repressed," Remy laughed.
"We- I- I'm not repressed!" Patton said. Logan didn't object, so that was hilarious, and Remy cackled.
"Sure you aren't babe, sure," Remy rolled his eyes. "I think I have already played with Roman at a house party, though," Remy said, not sure. He was pretty damn drunk.
"Yeah. You're a good kisser... I mean, I don't really remember. That was the party that somebody set fire to the pool, right?" Roman said, looking away and rubbing his neck with a little flush.
"Oh, yeah, I remember that part. That was amazing," Remy laughed.
"You… you've kissed before?" Patton hid slightly in his shirt.
"I'm party trash, babe, I've kissed lots of people. How are you not more scandalized by the arson?" Remy rolled his eyes.
"I already knew about that, everybody was talking about it the next day. I didn't know you and Roman were there. I only found out Roman goes to house parties recently. Sometimes I can't believe people our age are so stupid," Patton grumbled. "Um, present company excluded,"
"Ooh, babe, nice save, totally not offended here," Remy said sarcastically. Roman laughed, though. Remy sat down and got another slice of pizza, joining the others eating at the table. "Oh, you know what I've always wanted to try? They do this at girl's parties all the time. Light as a feather, stiff as a board," Remy smiled. "We can levitate Logan with our minds since he's certainly a non-believer,"
"There's no way that would work," Logan rolled his eyes and finally took a drink of the milkshake. He sputtered for a moment, but enjoyed the second sip better, looking much more appreciative after that. The first sip of alcohol must suck regardless of the quality of the alcohol? Perhaps it's a universal constant.
"Let's do that after we're more drunk," Roman suggested. "To help with that suspension of disbelief. We can play Mario Kart until we finish our milkshakes or we get a better idea," Roman offered.
"Oh, the party negotiator, that's hot," Remy winked.
"Oh, stop," Roman joked and flipped his hand at Remy. Patton blushed slightly.
"We're playing, babe, settle down," Remy rolled his eyes. "Do you want us to flirt with you, too?" Remy laughed.
"Pat can't take flirting, he eventually gets all quiet and mumble-y," Roman offered.
"Ah-ah, sober Pat can't take play flirting. We don't know drunk Pat's whole deal," Remy said. Patton shook his head. "Not comfortable with it? No problem. More sugar for Roman," Remy winked and blew Roman a kiss. Roman laughed and took another drink.
"Can we play Mario Kart now?" Logan piped up, sipping his milkshake again. He'd finished his slice and looked antsy. God damn, this nerd was adorable. Who gave him the right? Remy almost hated Logan's dad a little more for not letting him have more fun. Mario Kart is some family-friendly bullshit- well not the way they played it- and Logan was acting like it's the coolest thing on the planet.
"Yeah, let's go see how many times I can whoop y'all's asses in one day," Remy smirked. Roman took a big drink.
"Oh, I'm getting better, I'll be kicking your tight little butt," Roman grinned back.
"Oh, kinky," Remy laughed and finished his slice quickly.
"Alright bitches, we've had our fun. Now it's time to give in to the fate of the cards and meet drunk Pat and drunk Logan officially," Remy said, motioning dramatically to the card pile on the table. "This sheet of paper has the card meanings. The rules are: obey the cards and drink water. Ro and I will drink for queens because we are. We shouldn't need too many rounds for the lightweights here," Remy said. Roman nodded and held up his drink. Logan tentatively drew a card. A 10. "An auspicious start to the evening. Drink, bitches," Everyone threw back their first drinks obediently. Logan perhaps was more eager than Remy thought he would be. He knew that kid wanted to party. He fucking called it.
"Ah, a five. Well, to be fair to everyone should get one shot, but who should get the last one," Patton said, considering the 5 he just drew way too hard for a drinking game.
"Just pick, Pat, it's just another drink," Roman said, picking at some potato chips.
"Give it to me, babe, I'm the most of a drinking veteran," Remy said.
"Um, Roman," Patton muttered.
"Gurl, don't think I won't go rogue. Remus isn't here to make me stick to the rules," Remy chuckled the three stiffened at that. "God, you dorks are insufferable, I'm fine," Remy rolled his eyes and took the drink doled out to him.
"I can make you stick to the rules," Roman winked and hit his fist into his palm.
"Oh, gurl, you're nasty. You couldn't make me follow a single rule if you tried," Remy laughed while Roman drew a card 2 and took his drinks. Remy drew a jack and showed it to Logan and Patton with a mischievous smirk. Logan drank again like the world was ending, and Patton drank more tentatively. Logan was already starting to get a tipsy smirk. God bless lightweights.
Logan drew a king, and everybody raised their glasses with a cheer. Logan only was able to drink for a few seconds an and Patton stopped as soon as Logan did. Roman drank until he finished his cup, which was fine for Remy. He put down his cup with a gasp, emptied along with Remy's. Roman smiled and reached over to the skull vodka bottle and poured a few shots each in their cups while Remy got up to get the soda from the fridge. Remy chucked a can of coke at Roman and sat back down with his orange soda, and they both refilled their cups to the tune of Patton's grumbling.
"Did… Virgil and Remus like this game a lot?" Patton asked carefully, looking way more concerned than anyone should look while drinking hundred-dollar vodka.
"Nuh-uh, you're not doing any of your psychobabble magic on me, I'm not falling for it again. I'm here to get you guys drunk," Remy said, taking a sip of water. Patton drew a card with a sigh.
"Oh look, an 'I never'. I never drank to avoid my feelings," Patton said acridly, sporting a dark smile.
"Ouch, babe, ouch," Remy said, affronted, and he and Roman took a drink.
"Roman!" Patton hissed.
"Patton, I think you have a fundamental misunderstanding of why people drink," Roman rolled his eyes and glanced at Remy. Remy nodded.
"To have fun?" Patton offered hopefully.
"To have fun because life is terrible, babe. The second part is important," Remy drawled.
"Gentleman, please, we'll be here all night if you argue philosophy," Logan groaned. "Please draw, Roman,"
"Thank you," Roman smiled and picked up a card. "Bitches," he said and flipped the queen back on to the table and Roman and Remy drank. Remy got a 2 and enjoyed that high-dollar vodka in his drink. Logan picked up a card. "Ah. Categorizes. Species of arachnid," Logan smirked. Oh, this kid is cut-throat, too. Patton shivered.
"I-uh-um," Patton stammered for a few moments. Logan absolutely knew Patton's weaknesses and was not afraid of utilizing them. Remy almost wished Logan had come over to drink before. He knew how to party.
"Time's up babe, you gotta drink," Remy laughed after a few moments of sputtering. Patton nodded and took a sip, carefully drawing another card. It was an ace, and he groaned, taking another drink. Roman picked up a card, rolling his eyes at Patton.
"Oh, look, sweetie, another queen," Roman smirked and he and Remy both pounded their drinks a little harder than the technically should of.
"Okay, that's more than a drink!" Patton said, putting a hand on Remy's arm. Remy sighed and put down the cup.
"Okay, Pat, you've clearly got a problem here," Remy grunted. "Out with it,"
"I- uh- well… You didn't come to school today," Patton said.
"Self-care day," Remy supplied, motioning with his hand for Patton to get on with it.
"Um, a sudden upturn in mood is an indication of… well," Patton mumbled.
"He thinks you're at-risk today," Roman groaned.
"God, Pat, way to be a party downer. Ro, we get consolation drinks," Remy said and Roman smirked and took a drink with Remy.
"That's not how the game works," Patton hissed.
"There're no rules against extra drinks, Pat, and that was totally a party foul that Roman and I aren't having, right babe?" Remy said.
"Right. We're not drunk enough for emotional conversations. It's against the code," Roman supplied. Remy motioned to Roman.
"See! He gets it!" Remy nodded. "I'm fine. I'm doing good. I've got a house full of food and a glass of hundred dollar vodka,"
"Damn, Remy, that's why this is so smooth? Shit," Roman hissed, looking appreciatively at his glass.
"Take the rest of the bottle home. You can pull a hamlet with it," Remy smirked.
"You're kidding, right? Won't Virgil… get in trouble?" Roman said.
"How's he gonna get in trouble, exactly?" Remy laughed, shaking his head.
"I mean, when… he gets back," Roman trailed off slightly.
"Oh, that's cute," Remy drawled sardonically. Patton sighed sadly and flinched slightly. Hmm.
"Um, yeah, sure. I'd love to have a flask of this the next house party with that awful cheap beer. It tastes like piss and I can't stand it," Roman said a little awkwardly and Remy picked up a card. "Three," Remy said and threw back his drink. Patton was watching Remy fearfully, and Remy resisted the urge to just flip Pat off while Logan drew.
"7," Logan smiled in the same evil way Virgil did when he got a 7. Boy, they really have a lot in common. It's a shame Virgil will never get to drink with him. Things would probably get intense. Logan immediately put his thumb on the table and Remy was at the ready. Patton looked around in confusion.
"What are you guys-" Patton started trying to ask.
"Drink!" Logan shot proudly, pointing to Patton. Patton sputtered and drank again. He was definitely feeling it because Patton wobbled slightly when he put his cup down.
"Draw, Pat," Roman smiled and leaned forward on his hands. He was enjoying his. Patton groaned and drew a 6 again.
"I never… uh… went to a house party?" Patton asked, sounding unsure. Roman and Remy clinked plastic cups and drank. Roman pulled out a 5 and smiled.
"Three for me, two for Remy," Roman said and started drinking.
"Hey!" Patton shot. Roman shrugged while he drank.
"Patton, winning this game is getting drunk and everyone can do it. We'll stop when we're done. Settle down before there's another party foul," Remy and Roman traded soda cans and mixed new drinks.
Remy was laying back on Patton on the couch watching Logan play Mario Kart with Roman. He really wasn't up to another round, but the thumb master demanded to play after he was sufficiently red in the face. He could be a bossy bitch. It was actually kind of cute. Remy appreciated decisiveness. Remy was pretty used to cuddling someone by this time of the night, and Patton seemed upset, so He laid back with Patton. Patton was pretty happy about the cuddles, but his breathing kept hitching.
"Hey, uh, Pat, are you okay?" Remy asked.
"In… the physical sense or the vague philosophical sense?" Patton asked dreamily. Ah, alcohol. What a beauty.
"You… Pat," Remy said, suddenly realizing the issue. Patton didn't go home first. They all came with their backpacks. Shit, he was being a bad host.
"What?" Patton asked again in confusion. Remy got up and pulled Patton off the couch.
"Be right back," Remy said with a wave to the other two, acknowledged with a grunt from Roman, and dragged Patton into Virgil's room.
"What's up, kiddo?" Patton asked in confusion. Remy dug through Virgil's closet for another hoodie. They might not be… oh, Remus had a bomber jacket in here. Perfect. Virgil's hoodies might have been too tight, but a mountain of a man Remus's big loose jacket was just right for this.
"Here. Take it off. Put this on. Nobody'll see," Remy said, passing Patton the jacket.
"What are you talking about?" Patton asked nervously.
"Pat, you told me while you were drunk last time. I won't tell anybody," Remy hissed.
"I- I did?" Patton asked quietly.
"Drunk code," Remy waved. "I'll give you your privacy," Remy said imploringly. "You shouldn't be doing it while drinking in the first place. I'm sorry I forgot to tell you. I only know because my kinda-friend hurt themselves like that before. I shouldn't have assumed you'd know. You're not exactly a party prince. You need your full circulation for alcohol. So pocket it for now," Remy stepped out of the bedroom and closed the door, standing in front of it. There were some noises of protest from Patton, but eventually, Remy heard shuffling noises through the door and a little grunt of drunk struggle.
Patton re-emerged with a sheepish half-smile, wearing Remus's jacket zipped up. Remy smiled and nodded, and they headed back out to the couch.
"Pat was chilly," Remy said as they came back out.
"Oh, hey, I was wondering where that jacket went," Roman chuckled, though his smile was pretty weak.
"Virgil's parents keep the house weirdly cold," Remy explained, shrugging and pulling at Virgil's hoodie.
"I am feeling rather toasty, myself," Logan said with a small smile, not looking away from the game.
"Ha! Dad joke!" Patton laughed and eased back down on to the couch.
"Virgil gets hot when he gets drunk, too," Remy smiled and took a sip of water. "Only ever took off his hoodie when he was drunk,"
"Hey, does that mean we're drunk enough for this conversation?" Patton asked. Remy flopped back on to the couch dramatically.
"Fine," Remy drawled dramatically. "But I'm having it in protest," Remy groaned.
"Are you really okay?" Patton asked, carefully putting a hand on Remy's shoulder.
"Why shouldn't I be?" Remy rolled his eyes.
"Virgil and Remus are missing," Logan supplied quickly, firing a red shell at a very frustrated Roman.
"Yes, thank you, Lo-Lo," Patton hissed.
"I'm in denial or whatever," Remy shrugged. "I'm not worried about it anymore,"
"But… last week, I could have sworn..." Patton trailed off.
"It's a cycle and I reserve my right to go from anger back to denial," Remy crossed his arms. "I'm sitting with Ro," Remy grunted and got up, sitting next to the bouncing Roman on the couch while he tried to pass Logan again. Patton huffed from across the couch and crossed his arms.
"And back to anger again, apparently," Patton grunted.
"Damn right," Remy grinned, putting his feet up on the coffee table.
"Did… getting Remus's boots and wearing Virgil's hoodie help?" Patton asked nervously. "I thought it would, but I wasn't sure," Remy rolled his eyes.
"Whatever. I wanna dance. Do you care if I put on some dance music, Logan?" Logan shrugged and Remy got up to dig through the CDs next to the stereo. God, this was mostly metal. There was Pray for the Wicked from Panic! at the Disco, though. You could fucking jam to this album. Remy gingerly put the dragon metal CD away in its case and slid it to the side to grab later and put the Panic! CD in. Remus said he wanted it as a decoration. Virgil had all this stuff on his phone, so it's not like they didn't have access to the songs.
"Oh, shit!" Roman beamed as Silver Lining started played. "I'll dance with you Remy," Roman said, handing off the controller to a confused Patton mid-round as the numbers started to countdown for the race to start. Roman shared a drunk smile with Remy, and they started dancing together.