Riddler's Warehouse
Edward Nigma sat alone amongst his cold machinery.
His eyes littered with lack of sleep.
His brow drenched in sweat.
His lips strung together in a crooked sneering grin.
He had been expecting a visitor. A mind, not as devilishly brilliant as his own, but smart enough for Edward to comply with engaging conversation with him. Dr. Johnathan Crane PhD. Another escapee from the confining walls of the so called "House of the damned", Arkham Asylum.
"I make you weak at the worst of all times. I keep you safe, I keep you fine. I make your hands sweat, and your heart grow cold, I visit the weak, but seldom the bold.."
"What am I?"
He ruggedly whispered to himself, his smile never dimming through his words. He watched a familiar form slink out of the wormwood. A tall, slender being dressed in ragged clothing.
Of course, he knew the answer to his own riddle; allowing The Scarecrow to enter The Riddlers labyrinth~
Scarecrow had wondered what Eddie was up to with the machines. He had been reading a lot the past few days on engineering and programming, and hopefully would understand Riddler's explanations more than a layman would.
"Eddie... how good to see you. I hope you are making progress. Jervis broke out of Arkham. Hopefully he won't realize that we've been poking at his little machines- But we need to be prepared."
The Riddler didn't look at the "man" that stood in his lair. He was monitoring the countless rewired television screens that stood before his person.
He was reciting riddles to himself, almost like a chant of sorts
"What has no hands but grips you tight and squeezes out your grit?"
"What whispers warnings in your ear and makes you lose all wit?"
"What has no fangs yet bites down hard and causes valor's bleed?"
"What makes the indomitable spirit of man concede?"
He kept this up, barely listening to the words that entered his ears
"What has no form yet plagues your dreams at night and robs your sleep?"
"What cannot possess anything yet never stops to reap?"
"What tells you it cannot be done yet can't bear any weight?"
"What dwells within your ponderings yet cannot contemplate?"
He heard the name Jervis enter his brilliant ears. Jervis Tetch; the Mad hatter. The man who murdered thousands of people for kicks. Edward's face contorted into a scowl; he did not relish the thought of spilled blood. Still, he kept on chanting his riddles to himself..
"What is the simplest foe to quell yet costs the highest fare?"
"What tangles men throughout their lives despite its brittle snare?"
"What keeps you on your knees and loyal, captive, victim, slave?"
"What only withdraws its cold grip moments before the grave?"
He kept up, finally turning his neck to have a face to face with fear itself.
"What wastes a life and spawns regret and anguish, grief, concern?"
"What stifles your desires all life long, then makes you yearn?"
"What cruel and callous King rules over all the meek and frail?"
"What has no blade yet does behead and bludgeon and impale?"
His eyes were red, his brow pouring salty sweat like an overflowing sink; his lips were dry, his hair unkept under his bowler hat.
The man walked down the crooked steps of his perch. His steps were uncoordinated; how unlike himself.
"What am I?"
He asked. Not to Crane, but to the air.
His anger bubbled from within; not towards crane, but towards himself.
He thrashed his arms across the table, spewing metal and wires, bits and bops, screws and bolts across the hard flooring.
"What am I?!"
He shouted, infuriated. Edward was diagnosed with mood swings, but even then this was extreme.
Hmm, Riddler seemed to be going mad. Crane decided he would help his friend. He was glad he was wearing a mask- Riddler looked like he hadn't showered for ages
"There, there, Riddler. Let Dr. Crane help you. You speak a Riddle of fear. Are you afraid of something? "
Edwards' mind was racing. He could feel his brain pulsating with every thought that came to his mind.
He strained himself for days, his body was reacting to his unhealthy behavior.
Eddie was losing it. He needed help. And Crane was going to give it to him
He put a canister of sedative into his gas spray, and doused Riddler in it
"Go to sleeep, go to sleeep, go to sleeep little Eddie..."
Edwards' vision was clouded in a thick mist. He breathed it in, as his eyes began to grow darker.
His mind only thought of one thing..
'What question can you never answer "yes" to?'
Before he knew it, he started falling to the ground dead asleep.
"Are you asleep?" Crane chuckled. "- or dead?"
He grabbed Riddler before he hit the floor.
When little Eddie woke up it would be time for a therapy session. The sedative would keep Ed's limbs paralyzed but he was restrained in a chair just in case.
What would he speak about? One of Eddie's main motivations in life was playing mind games with Batman, and now that he was gone, poor little Riddler didn't have anyone to send his little Riddles to. He craved the attention- the recognition of his genius. Makes sense why he was wasting away. Perhaps they'd need to find closure on this issue.
Crane injected some of his anti-fear toxin. Riddler would not be afraid to tell him what's on his mind.
Edward started to wake up
"Patient is 'Edward Nigma' A.K.A. 'the Riddler'. Patient has been previously been diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder, delusions of grandeur, narcissistic personality disorder, and dependent personality disorder- primarily focused on the Batman"
"Now, Edward, I will ask you a few questions to help you. You have been overworking your mind and body. And don't worry, I'm not like those money-hungry ghouls at Arkham Asylum. I am your friend."
Edwards' vision was void of focus. All was a blur.
He felt the warm, rough bindings that were holding him in place.
His neck stung from injections; his mind awoke.
Ed's head hung low; his eyes remaining dark.
He heard words enter his ears, but he did not care to process what they were, or who was speaking them.
He tried to move his fingers; to no avail.
He figured the sharp pain in his neck was from an injection, most likely a sedative to keep himself from moving.
If he needed to escape this situation, he would have to play along long enough for the sedative to weaken.
"Edward, you have had trauma in your life. Your mother was absent, and your father was abusive. And he would refuse to believe you were intelligent despite overwhelming proof you were.
Do you believe your compulsion to lay clues for Batman to find and recognize how smart you are stems from this childhood experience?"
Ed said nothing.
Another man trying to solve him; Preposterous.
Such a waste of time to attempt to try and figure him out. To try and piece him together like a puzzle.
A riddle that everyone knows the answer to is worthless.
"Hmmm, yes that seems likely. I believe you are afraid, Mr. Nigma. Afraid that you could be the smartest person in the world, but it wouldn't matter if nobody else recognizes it. But nobody could possibly recognize it- unless they are as smart- or smarter- than you and willing to join your little games."
"You got the validation from Batman that your father would not- could not give you. You needed him to cope with your childhood trauma. And with your crutch gone, you've been... obsessed with finding a new game no?"
"What is it? You know Batman left two riddles when he disappeared- where is he? And Who is he? You never did figure that out did you?"
Edward took time in listening to the crude words of The Scarecrow.
Of course like many others who have tried and failed to piece Edward together like a jigsaw puzzle, he has utterly failed.
He thinks that the great Edward Nigma, the king of conundrums, the prince of puzzles. His enigmatic elegance makes all others jealous of his genius!
"You forget Crane, I am the man who asks the questions."
Edward responded gruffly; uninterested by his feeble attempts to break him
"Ah, good, you are talking. Very well. Ask your questions." Crane was interested in seeing where this went.
"How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?"
"It is highly unlikely the concert floor will crack, Mr. Riddler." Crane presumes Riddler thought of himself as the floor. But he could deep down be the egg.
Edward gave a sinister chuckle to himself
"Well done."
"An easy one to be sure, but I expected a child to figure that one out, no less the "Master of fear"."
"You are resisting my help. Probably due to not having social support in your childhood. It has only been recently you've been accepting help from Selina after all."
"Not like she gives you a choice." He giggled.
"Help?"
He scoffed at his words
"I never need help with anything!"
Classic denial, thought Crane.
"Of course you do. That's why you pursued Batman with mind games. You needed his help validating your intellect. And you certainly needed help when you were ranting and raving relentlessly just a few minutes ago."
"Perhaps this is your greatest fear, being helpless. And having to admit to yourself that sometimes- you need someone."
"Ha!"
Edward laughed in the face of fear
"Batman is nothing compared to my brilliance!"
"The king thug never solved any of my riddles, he cheats and gets away with it!"
"He could never admit that I, Edward Nigma: The Riddler, was his intellectual superior~!"
"Well, if you are so smart- how is it that he is able to get away with cheating? And you keep goading him to come play your games- an odd choice if he is such an unworthy opponent."
"I should expect such crude thinking from the likes of you."
Edward rebutted
"Of course your mind cannot comprehend my brilliance, so I'll spare your grey-matter and say this: You are false, Doctor. I am not a man in need of help nor will ever need such a thing."
"Riddle me this: What is this session?"
"No. It's not over. It's just getting started. You see, I have something in common with Kitty. I also won't give you a choice with my help."
Scarecrow up his phone
"Time for a game of my own. I will give Ms. Kyle a call, telling her on speaker that you are doing fine, that the two of us are stroking our egos, nothing urgent. You could tell her that you need help- or stand your ground."
Crane took out his phone and rang for Selina.
Selina picked up after the first ring.
"Crane, what's up? Have you seen Eddie? I've got something to talk to him about, but I can't find him."
Her voice was concerned, with a slight tone of cation.
"Oh Yeah! I'm with him right now! He's been studying the machines. I think this side project is good for him. In fact, would you like to speak with him now?"
Crane faced the phone towards Edward, waiting for the response
Edward smiled, speaking up
"Yes, I am sorry for my sudden disappearance. I am rather tied up at the moment here with good Dr. Crane."
Edward spoke in riddles
"All is well, progress on the machines that you brought to me. Our minds are binding together to enhance the frequency of Tetch's devices. Sharp minds think alike."
Selina gave a frustrated sigh.
"Look, Ed, I get you have your massive ego to stroke, but at least let me know next time, alright?"
She paused for a moment.
"We're keeping our promise, though. You'll be in bed by midnight. Or I'm gonna be really pissed off."
She paused for a moment.
"Crane, make sure not to talk his ear off, alright? I've got to go, see you later."
"Oh I'm sure you will, Kitty."
Crane turned the speaker off.
"Tied up? Binding? You know you need her help. Perhaps the reason you speak in riddles isn't to fool Batman or the authorities. It's to fool yourself."
He turned the speakers back on
"Have anything left to say to Kitty, Ed?"
"Yes, I do."
Edward spoke up
"Tell Holly to stop stealing my damn tools. Little greasemonkey."
"Then get better locks, Nigma."
Selina hung up.
"As for you, Jonathan."
"I've said it once before, and I shall say it again. I do not require help. My brilliance if far greater than either you, Batman or anyone could comprehend."
He spat
"I can be cracked, I can be made; I can be told, I can be played."
"What am I?"
"A joke."
"That is what this session is, Crane."
"Perhaps." Scarecrow yawned "We can put that experiment to the test. If you can manage to escape these restraints before Kitty gets here to save your butt, then I will be eating crow."
Edward smiled
"Riddle me this Jonathan.."
"You Can See Me,"
"But You Cannot Touch Me."
"With The Flick Of A Switch,"
"I Enter Your Home."
"With Another,"
"I Leave You Alone."
"What Am I?"
"Ah crap" Crane put his modified scythe in position to use as a conductor.
"Incorrect. The answer is ELECTRICITY~!"
With those words, the special question-mark shaped pin on his suit emitting a high-voltage shock aiming at the other man in front of him.
It stung Edward, but he knew it would hurt crane far more than it hurt him.
It's unlikely he would move out of the way in time, since electricity travels at the speed of light; thanks to Edwards copper wiring he installed in his suit-piece. Much faster than any human reflex.
The electricity was drawn to metal, metal that was prominent in Crane's Staff, It ran down to the ground, leaving Crane unscathed. Thankfully he was dressed in mostly nonconductive clothing like rubber, leather, and kevlar. He was left a little dazed at the experience
"Hahah... good one Eddie..." Ropes and electric shocks, was this a supervillain lair, therapy session or BDSM dungeon?
Edward's smile grew even wider.
"Riddle me this, what's the difference between electricity and lightning?"
"You have to pay for electricity."
"This whole building has wires in every part of it. You just sent enough volts into the system to shut down the main power grid of this sector of Gotham."
"As soon as it reaches the power grid, about 8 city blocks will go dark."
"Enough for GCPD to notice where the source of the disturbance is."
A dark shape dropped from the ceiling, landing perfectly on Crane, and crumpling him to the floor under her weight.
"Honestly Ed, that was rather... shocking."
Selina said with a huge grin.
She looked at him with a raised eyebrow.. "Was I interrupting something?"
Crane was sore but still conscious.
"Ow… ow… Oh, hey Kitty!" Crane coughed, "Ed was in delirium, so I calmed him down and restrained him for his own safety. We had a therapy session."
Selina looked down at Crane. Up at Eddie.
"Yeah, I'm calling bullshit on that."
She planted her boot firmly on Crane's neck.
"Ed, you want him knocked out, or on his feet, so that you can knock him out?"
"Likewise."
"But there is another fish to fry, Catwoman."
"That electric pulse that Crane redirected entered the wires underneath the floor. I use this sector's main generator for power, but after that jolt it should be overloading the system right about..."
Before Ed finished his words, the place went dark; along with countless homes and other warehouses
"..now actually."
"Hehehe he does need help" thought Crane. He was additionally enjoying the adrenaline rush after being electrocuted and having Catwoman's boot on him. Even wish she stepped on him harder.
"Mm. GCPD will be here soon."
She leaned down to Crane, shifting his broken mask to look him in the eyes.
"Better run along. I brought my whip, and while I've now learned much more about your kinks than I'd ever want to know...this won't be pleasant if you stick around."
She pressed her boot with a bit more pressure on his throat, before stepping off of him to stand in front of Ed, cat claws out and whip in hand.
"Those cops won't like what I will plant for them" *Crane said weakly. He carefully put several of his fear bombs near the entrance of the warehouse, set to go off the moment the cops would show. "Edward, if you would like another therapy session let me know so I can schedule it." He saluted Riddler and headed off.
"What a strange, queer man Crane is."
Edward commented to the darkness.
"It may be in your best interest to leave, Selina. I'm not exactly capable of movement thanks to him."
There's a crackling sound, and a long fluorescent tube is illuminated, shedding light in the room. Selina drops it to the floor.
Selina looks at him for a long moment. Her goggles reflect off the dim light*
"Ed." she said softly.
"You look terrible." her lips were curled in a half smile as she leaned in, starting to cut through the ropes with her claws.
"Selina."
Ed watched her.
"I cannot move. Crane injected a sedative, and I'm sure GCPD are going to wait until my limbs are capable of functioning again."
Selina finished cutting off the ropes.
She leaned down, ruffling Ed's hair.
"I figured you'd be riding with me, so I brought my van. Just focus on taking some deep breaths, I'll patch you up when we get to my place."
She lifted Ed, placing him over one shoulder.
"I disabled your traps, by the way. Very tricky, it's why I wasn't here sooner."
She explained as she headed for the back exit.
"I-.."
Ed said
". . ."
"You have a van?"
She laughed a little
"Yeah. Minivan, actually. Helps blend in when I'm coming back from a big heist. I love my bike to pieces, but it's pretty iconic."
She kicked her way out of the back door, walking up to the blue minivan. Looked like it was ready to drive a bunch of kids to soccer practice.
"No one looks at me twice in this thing. And it can take a hit or two."
"How quaint."
Edward commented upon seeing it
She smirked "Try and contain your excitement."
She placed him in the passenger's seat, buckling him in.
She tossed off her hood and goggles, and put a hoodie and jeans over her catsuit. For Ed, she tucked a blanket around his shoulders and removed his mask and hat.
Then she got in, started the car, and started driving. As the police cars drew nearer, she drove past confidently.
Cops were milling around the road, and Selina slowed her car to a halt next to two of them.
Ed didn't say anything.
It was a mix of humiliation and due to the fact they're rearing up on GCPD.
His base was lost, but he had others. He would have to go back and collect the technology he was fiddling with, most of it hidden behind a false wall.
Selina leaned out, innocently asking for directions, which the cops completely bought. She drove them back, not saying much, until they arrived at her apartment
Catwoman's Apartment
Selina brought Ed inside, holding him in both arms this time, and walking over to place him on her couch.
The floor was littered with tools and supplies. Holly's project was taking shape now, two small, black hearing aids sitting partially constructed on the floor. Surrounded with tools that looked very familiar to Nigma.
"You're dehydrated, we'll take care of that first. Where do you keep the antitoxin for Scarecrow's gas?" she asked, bringing him some water.
"Below the sink."
He monotonously replied.
He saw his tools that Holly has been "borrowing" from his home. He would have to set up a cage trap later for her.
She left, coming back a few minutes with the antitoxin, and starting to get to work administering it.
"Why did you ask me to leave? You know I wouldn't do that."
She asked, quietly focused on her task.
"Mostly due to the fact I doubted you could sneak past GCPD hellbent on capturing Arkham escapees with me slung on your shoulder."
She laughed softly, adjusting him on the couch, and continuing her work.
"Ed, you're a brilliant liar. But you can't lie to me. You know I'm fast enough and clever enough to get us both out of there."
She looked up. "So why?"
"That's certainly a riddle, isn't it?"
Edward raised an eyebrow, having a small grin on his face
She laughed a little
"You know, the reason I keep you two around is because you're both so alike. Brilliant minds who can't see past their own noses. Riddle me this, who am I talking about?"
He commented on her words
"The one you are referring to is a brute. He only "solves" my riddles by cheating his way through them."
She pauses, shakes her head.
"Like I said. Can't see past their noses. I'm not talking about Batman, Ed, though I'd agree he is similar. I'm talking about Holly."
Riddler raised an eyebrow.
Selina snorted. "Don't give me that look. You love to run your mouth, so you could at least try."
She paused.
"You both come from a place where you were hurt, very often, very hard. Where your pain was overlooked, just as much as your genius."
She smiles a little. "You both commit crimes for the same reason. You kidnapped and stole for recognition and thrill. She does the same."
"And you both haven't the slightest idea how to ask anyone for anything.
Edward was getting annoyed by people studying him.
As she worked, Ed could start to feel the toxins drain out of his system.
"Do me a favor, Ed. When she breaks into your place, and you pretend not to notice, sit down with her and help next time. Offer your help without expecting anything, except your own satisfaction. When was the last time you worked with someone like that? Hell, when was the last time you did something, not as a scheme? Just for your own enjoyment?"
Edward sat in silence for a moment. He could feel his arms and legs springing back to life.
After the long, quiet silence between them, He leaned forward, looking the Catwoman dead in the eye.
"What fun~"
Her nostrils flared a moment. She weighed the pros and cons. And then leaned forward, hugging him lightly, before pulling back.
"Just a suggestion from a friend. And for the love of all that is holy, take a shower, Nigma."
Scarecrow's Catacombs
Scarecrow slunk back to his catacombs. The therapy session could have gone better- but it could have gone worse. He had successfully analyzed Riddler's resistance to accepting help to his own detriment- and given how stubborn he was, it would be a while before this could be treated.
Eddie and Selina probably weren't going to talk to him for a while. But he knew Eddie would realize that he was right. Well, he would realize that or fail to become the best Riddler he could. And they'd come back to him if they were his true friends. The thought of permanently losing them started to fill his eyes with tears. "Ed.. Kitty"
Crane went to his supplies room and began to fix his suit. Thankfully he had more items to spare thanks to the heist on Mandragora's place.
"Riddler refused to accept help, even when it was necessary- But perhaps I should try to be more self-reliant like I was before"
Crane decided that he would spend extra time tinkering and modifying his traps and gadgets. Without the help of Selina and Edward he had to become an expert like them.
Crane recorded the news- He'd watch it with a microdose of fear toxin in case Jervis was up to anything. No doubt the blackout would cause a panic. Ah the meyhem cause would certainly bring Crane some joy.
He sat down to rest and heal, petting and feeding his pet crows.
"When the pie was opened
The birds began to sing—
Wasn't that a dainty dish
To set before the king?"
Scarecrow looked up some schemes he would do independently. But it would be wise of him to start to strengthen his allegiance with his other friends.