gemsofformenos: "At my first try to send this review I got reported an network error from this page so I try it again." That's always super annoying. And nope, no double post. "Azula and her precious fire is something special and to see her having back her fire is awesome." Azula's fire is just so important to her character. I can never really bring myself to take it from her permanently. "You have captured her joy so well, I could really feel the weight which has fallen off from her." Thank you :) I feel like her fire is very therapeutic for her. "That well trained movements work out connections which can be reactivated easily." I also feel like it is so much a part of her that even with her memory loss, it would be second nature. "But a really clever move was to bring up the fact that Sokka has killed a person too." Thanks! It's another way for him to kind of connect with her and let her know that she isn't alone. It helps build trust and it's something that he needed to get off of his chest. It was a bit of a role swap for her so she kind of sees why Sokka had been so upset with her before. "Awesome to see her old strength coming back to her." Yeah, she's doing quite a bit better. "Thank you again for all your support and wishes for me that's so kind and thoughtful of you." And you're welcome, I hope that you're still doing well!
Azula pulls on a sleep robe. It is slightly too large for her petite frame, but it is the best that the institution could do given that she had made her appearance on such short notice. She wants to have them send for her clothes, but Zuko will be there tomorrow so there wouldn't be much of a point.
It isn't like she will be sleeping easy anyways.
She sighs to herself and begins tucking herself under the covers, all the while preparing herself for the nightmares to come. She wraps herself up in the blankets as tightly as she possibly can, as though that will protect her from the cold in her dreams. With a flick of her wrist, the candle's flame is out.
She stares at it as she waits for sleep to take her.
But hours later, she finds that it never does. She thinks that she might be thankful for it. She'd rather have a sleepless night than one where she is forced back into that icy room. Her anxious musings are put to a merciful halt by a knock at her door. Perhaps she should let the nurse know that she is having trouble sleeping.
She hastily untangles the blankets and opens the door. "Sokka?"
.oOo.
Somehow she looks so small standing there in the doorframe. Small and sad. She rubs at her eyes.
"You still want someone to stay in the room with you?" He holds out his pillows and blankets.
He thinks that he catches a hint of a smile. She steps out of the way and motions for him to enter.
"Are you here to finish your story? I'll quiet down and listen to it this time." She mutters.
"I was actually here to check on you."
"You don't trust me with the story."
Sokka rubs his hand over his face. "I just don't feel like telling it right now. Tomorrow, okay?"
She fixes him with a very subtle pout. "Fine." He watches her crawl back onto the bed and roll to face away from him.
Here we go again, he thinks to himself. When she wants a tale she gets really persistent about it. He isn't sure which question is more pressing in his mind so he just asks them both; "why do you think I don't trust you? And you're angry with me again aren't you?"
"No, you're angry at me."
"I'm not, I promise." He insists. "I wouldn't be here if I was." He says it but he isn't sure himself if it is true. "Why would I be angry?"
"Because I make blunt and offhanded remarks."
He chuckles, she certainly isn't wrong. Punctuating those by laughing at inappropriate times, she is quite a social disaster. "Yeah, you do, do that." He pauses. "But, believe it or not, I know that you didn't mean anything by them." It occurs to him rather suddenly, that he is beginning to get a feel for Azula and her mannerisms. Which, if he must say, is no easy feat.
She rolls back around to face him and a kind wave of reassurance sets in. "So you will finish your story?"
"It's getting late, you're barely keeping your eyes open."
"Wonderful, perhaps a bedtime story will finish the job."
He groans. "You are irritatingly stubborn."
"Diligence is key when trying to accomplish any task."
"Not everything is some big mission." He rolls his eyes.
"It doesn't have to be, no, if you will just…"
He presses a finger to her lips. "Shh. It's time to sleep." He takes the covers and pulls them up to her chin, ignoring her cutting glare. He lays his pillows, this time putting one between them so she'll have something else to cling to. He spreads his blanket out, but somehow he gets the feeling that she will end up snatching it.
"You...how dare you?" She sputters.
This time his laughter almost has him in tears. "I'll talk to you in the morning."
.oOo.
She sees her body, but only as an outline on a black backdrop. It is pulsating with silvery, shimmering, spider webbing now and again a few much brighter beads shoot off and roll down the thin veins like dew down a blade of grass or some sort of electrical charge.
The beads of light travel all about her body, but mostly travel to her hands, her chest, and her stomach. Her stomach where the light doesn't pulse silver-white, but a burning blue. It is so vivid and it beckons her to it. She wants nothing more than to touch the fair-sized ball of light. But she finds that she can't move at all, she is as tethered as the outline of her body is.
She watches from above as something comes down, it buries itself in her belly and burrows towards that glowing orb. It slices vertically and then disappears.
Something new, several somethings, take its place. They yank and pull until the sphere comes loose; the pulsating veins grow fainter and weaker until they completely darken. All except for the soft orange-yellow glow dashed with brown. It beats in her chest but she thinks that it is curiously dimmer.
She feels a tug upon her soul and her world grows more and more solid as she is pulled closer to what was once only an outline of a body. By the time she is thrust into it, the world is whole and physical.
They loom over her with featureless heads, like unfinished portraits that have yet to gain faces. They speak to her but their sound is indistinguishable. More so with the pain that slices through her abdomen. Her, gaping, gushing abdomen.
She tries to sit up but the binds dig into her wrists, hips, and ankles. They hold up that luminescent orb, it looks so much smaller in their hands.
She isn't sure exactly what it is, but they have taken it from her and she wants it back.
She wants it back.
She wants it back.
She wants it back.
She wants...
.oOo.
Azula whimpers softly to herself. Sokka hates the sound of it. Her breathing seems to quicken and his heart seizes. This is the first time that she has had a nightmare while in his company.
He doesn't know if he should wake her or leave her to weather the storm.
Her hands curl around the blankets and she gives another soft cry. One that is almost angry.
He rubs her arm, light little strokes until she seems to grow less tense. The relief is passing. Her anguish comes back but with a much higher intensity.
He hopes that she will wake herself.
Instead she thrashes about, a few tears running down her cheeks.
He holds his breath and waits for it to pass. But it doesn't, not entirely. She has stopped thrashing but she still cries softly.
This time when he holds her, it is on purpose. He has forgotten about the pillow he'd placed between them, but the gesture alone seems to calm her, if only a little. He rests his head on hers and her crying slows.
Her hand snakes over the pillow, she still has something just short of a death grip on the fabric. He gently pats her back with the hand that he has slung over her. The other rests on the back of her head, holding her forehead to his.
His eyes go wide and takes a sharp breath; what is he doing!? He begins to retract his hand.
"Sokka?"
He almost swears.
Anxiety claws at his belly as her eyes narrow in confusion.
"S-Sorry," he stutters, "you were having a nightmare and I was just trying to help." He hastens the retracting of his hand but she catches it by the wrist and pulls it back around her.
She tries to snuggle closer, makes a face, and tosses the pillow between them to the side. He feels her arms come around him and she closes her eyes again.
He finds himself wondering if it is a good idea to get so affectionate with her. He considers, for the first time in a while, a situation where she gets her memories back and completely forsakes everything he has done to help her. Forsakes it and slips back into her old, unkind habits.
She clutches the fabric of his shirt and presses her cheek against his chest and the worry leaves his mind.
He resumes patting her on the back and stroking her hair.
.oOo.
Azula doesn't particularly want to try sleeping again. She wipes at her eyes, she almost hadn't noticed that they were teary. "Was I...crying?" She cringes.
"A little, yeah." He says.
"Fantastic…" she mutters.
"It's alright, you've been through a lot, you can cry sometimes."
"You can cry, I'll pass if I can help it."
"Of course you will." He chuckles.
She readjusts the position of her head and closes her eyes. "Thank you for staying with me, Sokka."
"Clearly I'm not really much help." He gives an awkward laugh.
"You are. You're a lot of help." More help then she ever thought that she'd get. It is terribly nice to know that she won't wake up alone when the nightmares do come. She think that the night is still early, perhaps she may get some sleep in. Even if she falls into another nightmare, she supposes that it isn't so bad. She tightens her hold on Sokka.
"Glad that you think so."
"Good night, Sokka."
"Because I was starting to think that I was just being annoying."
"You are." She smiles. "You talk too much."
"Hey!"
She presses her finger to his lips. "Shut up."
"Okay, I was a lot nicer than…"
"I'm just joking." She nuzzles her head closer. "Keep talking, I'm sure you'll find something boring enough to have me sleeping again."
"How would you like to learn about the different types of seaweeds you can use in a seaweed stew?"
"That sounds horrendously unentertaining."
"Great, so the most common type of to use in a good seaweed stew is lightly salted wakame."