.

-The Naturalist-

May of 2031. Afternoon. Slateport City, Hoenn.

Hilda sat on the living room sofa, drumming her fingers irritably against her arm. The loud crunching and scraping coming from the kitchen was driving her crazy, and she thought she might explode.

He was going to get it when he got home.

As if on cue, the front door opened, followed by a voice saying, "I'm home!"

But Hilda didn't budge. Her gaze stayed forward and her brow twitched in irritation as Brendan walked into the room, grinning.

"Man, you'll never guess what I saw out on the field today!" he started, sliding his bag off of his shoulder. "A shiny Seviper," he gushed excitedly, but Hilda didn't look at him. "Can you believe my luck? What are the chances of finding one of those? Man, I wish I had my camera! My phone battery died out, so I couldn't—!" He blinked, suddenly noticing Hilda's cold demeanor, and cocked an eyebrow. "…Hilda?"

Hilda continued to glare forward, her arms crossed tightly in front of her chest. "What?"

Brendan reeled back just the slightest at the edge in her tone and scrunched his face. "…I just… was telling you about a shiny Seviper I found today."

Suddenly, Hilda snapped her head to face him, her eyes glaring daggers. "Oh yeah? Well, you'll never guess what I found today."

Brendan glanced from left to right before focusing his attention back on her. "…What?"

Hilda sat still a moment longer before rising to her feet and marching into the kitchen. Judging by the loud 'stomp' in her step, Brendan knew that this wasn't going to be good, and reluctantly followed.

"That," Hilda spat, pointing a finger towards the kitchen wall above the sink.

Brendan furrowed his brows, his eyes trailing to where she was pointing. After a moment, it was clear what had made his wife so angry.

On the floor was a mess of broken plaster and peeled paint, and within the wall was a large, gaping hole. Perched just inside of the hole, munching on a piece of dry wall, was a very content looking Zigzagoon.

Hilda's eyes darted to Brendan angrily, waiting for an explanation—but all he could do was gawk at the scene before him.

"Well?" Hilda pressed.

Brendan continued to stare, but then his face lit up in remembrance, and he pounded his fist into his palm. "Oh!" he started. "This is the Zigzagoon from yesterday!"

"From yesterday," Hilda repeated dryly.

Brendan nodded. "Yeah. I met this guy just outside our yard while I was studying his nest," he laughed nervously, rubbing his head. "I offered him a piece of my sandwich! And well, I guess he thought that meant he could make himself at home in our kitchen!"

"And because you left the kitchen door open! Again!" Hilda snapped, and Brendan flinched. "How many times do I have to tell you to make sure it's shut all the way before you go out?!" She pointed a finger towards the Zigzagoon. "Because when you don't, things like this happen!"

Brendan winced, holding up his hands. "Hey, chill out! It's not that big a deal!"

"Not that big a deal!?" Hilda snapped, and Brendan shut his mouth. "There's a hole in our kitchen because your little friend here is making a snack out of our wall!" She scowled, eyeing the Pokemon angrily. "I've been trying to move him all day but he won't come out!"

"Have you tried using one of your Pokemon?" Brendan pointed out dryly, and Hilda nearly burst.

"Yes, Brendan, because I wanted Samurott make the hole in the wall bigger with his Hydro Canon."

Brendan sighed. "Okay, okay, I get it—you want him out," he said, and Hilda's gaze narrowed.

Shaking his head, Brendan walked up to the wall, putting a hand to his chin as he examined the situation carefully. The Zigzagoon shoved another piece of dry wall into his mouth.

"Well, Professor—what does your research say about this?" Hilda asked sarcastically.

"My research says that this Zigzagoon must have some pretty tough claws to dig through plaster like this," Brendan observed, placing a hand to the wall. "I'm actually impressed. I didn't know Zigzagoon could—!"

"Brendan!"

Brendan winced. "Right," he sighed, looking back up at the Zigzagoon, who tilted his head. Climbing up onto the counter, Brendan got a better look into the hole. "It looks like he wants to make a nest here," Brendan stated. "Makes sense—surrounded by food and warmth? It's the ideal nesting spot."

"And?"

"And… he's not gonna wanna move," Brendan said, reaching his hand into the hole as the Zigzagoon backed up, out of his reach. Sighing, Brendan jumped off of the counter. "In other words, this is a problem."

Scowling, Hilda put a hand to her face. "I don't have time for this!" she said irritably. "I have training to do!"

"Well, what have you tried already? To get him out, I mean."

Hilda glanced up at the hole. "What haven't I tried? I tried pulling him out, baiting him out, scaring him out—I even shoved a broom in there," she said, putting her hands to her hips.

Brendan appeared unfazed, murmuring, "No wonder he won't come out—you terrify him."

Hilda glowered, clenching her fists, "I hope I terrify him after he's destroyed my kitchen," she snapped, angrily eyeing the Zigzagoon—who hissed at her in return.

Brendan shook his head disapprovingly. "What happened to having your heart being one with a Pokemon's? Isn't that your motto or something? An attitude like that won't get this Zigzagoon out."

Hilda deadpanned. "Every motto has an exception."

Brendan rolled his eyes. "Sure," he said, turning back to the Zigzagoon. "Just let the Pokemon naturalist handle this," he said confidently, climbing back onto the counter.

Hilda mouthed Brendan's words mockingly as soon as his back was turned to her, and he smiled into the hole.

"Hey buddy!" Brendan greeted cheerfully. "Remember me? We met yesterday!"

The Zigzagoon blinked, tilting his head curiously and Brendan smiled. "Listen pal, why don't you come out of there, huh?" he asked, reaching his hand inside.

The Zigzagoon tilted his head the other way, staring at Brendan's hand. He leaned his head forward, sniffing it. Brendan looked back to Hilda with a smirk. "What did I say?" he boasted. "All it takes is a little TLC."

Hilda wasn't impressed. "Just get that damn thing out of my kitchen."

Brendan closed his eyes, waving her off. "Yeah, yeah," he drawled, turning his attention back to the Zigzagoon. But when he looked forward, the Zigzagoon was gone—and so was his Mega Bracelet.

Brendan gasped, looking down at his bare wrist. "H-hey!" he stammered, looking back into the hole. "He took my bracelet!"

Hilda's eyes widened, surprised. "He what?"

Brendan pushed his head deeper into the hole, looking around frantically. His eyes then caught glimpse of the Zigzagoon curled up, far out of his reach. In his hands was Brendan's bracelet as he attempted to chew at the Key Stone in the center.

Brendan's face fell. "H-hey! That's not food!" he snapped, trying to reach the Tiny Raccoon Pokemon. But the Zigzagoon responded by crawling further away and Brendan winced. "Give it back…!"

Deciding he had had enough of Brendan bothering him, the Zigzagoon scrunched up defensively and fired a Pin Missile forward.

Brendan yelped in surprise, pulling his head out of the way and slipping off of the counter in the process—landing on his back with a painful 'thud'. He winced, staring up at the ceiling.

Hilda smirked, hovering over him with her hands on her hips. "Right," she chuckled. "Leave it to the Pokemon naturalist."

"We just have to rethink this," Brendan said, leaning on his fist. "There has to be a way to get him out of there."

An hour had passed since Brendan's Mega Bracelet had been stolen, and it seemed like no matter what they tried, that Zigzagoon wouldn't budge. It was perfectly content in its brand new, humble abode.

"Maybe we should try baiting it again," Hilda mused, glancing to the hole in the wall.

Brendan blinked. "What foods did you try before?"

Hilda closed her eyes thoughtfully. "Pretty much everything in the fridge. I mean, I dunno what Zigzagoon like to eat."

Brendan scrunched his face, thinking. "Nuts and berries, mostly… But I don't have any berries on me right now," he murmured, glancing to the kitchen cabinets. Suddenly, something in his head clicked and he ran to the cabinets, swinging them open.

Hilda stood up in alarm, her eyes widening. "What are you doing?"

Brendan grinned, turning around with a large jar in his hands. "I've found our bait!"

Hilda blinked, her eyes trailing down to the jar, and she deadpanned.

"Absolutely not."

"Come on, Hilda—just a little," Brendan begged, lifting the jar. "It's only peanut butter!"

Hilda growled, pointing a finger at him. "Peanut butter that I pay good money for! Do you know how much it costs to have that shipped from Unova!?"

Brendan closed his eyes. "I'll pay you back—I just want to give him a little taste!" he said, but Hilda wasn't buying it. "Zigzagoon love nuts, so maybe they'll like your brown paste."

"Peanut butter," Hilda correctly sharply.

"Same thing," Brendan dismissed, brushing her off. "I'm only giving him a bit—you want him out of the kitchen, right?" he asked, climbing up on to the counter.

Hilda watched Brendan angrily, pursing her lips. "…Fine! Just get him out!"

Brendan grinned, peeking his head into the hole once more. "Hey pal," he greeted, and the Zigzagoon looked over. "I've got something for you!" he said, holding up the jar so Zigzagoon could see.

The Pokemon blinked, his nose twitching, and Brendan smiled. "It smells good, right?" he asked, scooping some peanut butter onto his finger and offering it to him. "Want a taste?"

The Zigzagoon seemed to ponder this for a moment as his nose continued to twitch. But after a few seconds, he put the bracelet down and approached Brendan carefully.

"That's right," Brendan coaxed, holding out his finger. "Just a little more."

The Zigzagoon took a small step closer and carefully licked the peanut butter off of his finger. Brendan lit up. "He ate it!" he confirmed, catching Hilda's attention.

"Then get him out already!" Hilda pressed.

Brendan ignored her, lifting the jar so Zigzagoon could see. "You want some more, right?" he asked, holding it closer to him. "So just come here and you can have all the peanut butter you want."

The Zigzagoon studied the jar carefully, taking a step closer as he sniffed the plastic. Brendan pursed his lips in anticipation and Hilda held her breath. But after a moment, the Zigzagoon let out a disapproving grunt, and swatted the jar out of Brendan's hand—knocking it to the floor and spilling its contents.

The silence that followed was so intense that even Zigzagoon looked uncomfortable. And in that moment, Brendan could have sworn he felt the earth crack and crumble beneath them as all Hell broke loose.

"That little piece of shit!" Hilda yelled, storming to the counter.

Brendan's face fell and he held out his hands defensively. "Hilda—wait! We can try something else!" he pleaded.

But Hilda ignored him, pulling herself up onto the counter and pushing him out of the way as she shoved her arm into the hole.

"I'll get you out of there if it's the last thing I do, you jack ass!" Hilda cried, waving her arm around in attempt to grab the Zigzagoon. But he jumped out of the way and hissed at her—only causing Hilda to hiss right back.

Hilda's one-sided, raging battle with the Zigzagoon continued on like that for several minutes. All Brendan could do was hope that she wouldn't actually grab hold of the Pokemon as he attempted to yank her off of the counter.

"What's going on?"

Hilda and Brendan stopped, both breathing heavily as they turned to the voice coming from the doorway. Staring back at them curiously was Amber. She tilted her head, assessing the situation.

Between the both of her parents standing on the counter, and the hole in the kitchen wall, she could only being to imagine the type of day they had.

"Honey," Brendan breathed. "I didn't know you were home—I thought you were at Allie's."

"I… just got back," Amber said hesitantly, her gaze shifting between Brendan and Hilda. "What happened here?"

Just then, the Zigzagoon noticed the sound had died down, and popped his head out of the hole. Amber took notice of him and lit up.

"Ah!" she started, smiling brightly. "A Zigzagoon! He's so cute!"

The Zigzagoon blinked owlishly, and Hilda scowled at him. "Cute isn't the word. More like a rotten—!"

Amber ignored her and smiled, bending over as she patted her knees. "Come here!" she coaxed happily.

The Zigzagoon perked up and immediately jumped out of the hole in the wall, running up to Amber with a wagging tail.

Brendan and Hilda both deadpanned as their daughter bent down to his level, giggling.

"What are you doing in here?" Amber asked, scratching his ears before scooping him into her arms. "You belong outside!"

The Zigzagoon continued to wag his tail. He lightly licking Amber on the cheek and let out a happy, "Zi!"

Amber smiled at him before looking to her parents and chirping, "I'm gonna take him outside! I'll be right back!"

And with that she was gone—and so was Zigzagoon.

All Brendan and Hilda could do was stand in silence, not even bothering to get off of the counter.

"What just happened?" Hilda asked dryly.

Brendan looked to the hole in the wall, and then glanced out the window. Amber was bending down, carefully placing the Zigzagoon onto the ground and petting his back. The Zigzagoon stood on his hind legs and waved to her before running back into the bushes. Amber waved back before turning on her heel and walking out of sight.

Brendan cracked a smile as he watched the exchanged. After a moment, he laughed and rubbed his head.

"I guess it's like I said—we just had to leave this to a Pokemon naturalist!"

...And so it continues!