XXI
John found himself thoroughly impressed with Natalie's planning skills. Once decided on the lodge, she sprawled out on the bed next to him with a map of New Alexandria, muttering to herself as she studied it, her brow furrowed in thought. She approached it much like an officer would approach orders, reviewing all the information and making a solid course of action, even with a couple backups. After making a couple of calls down to the concierge, she finally tossed aside the map and sighed.
"There," she said. "All settled – got a taxi coming for us in fifteen minutes to take us to the car rental agency. I figured having our own means of transportation is more feasible where you could get called back at any moment."
John nodded approvingly.
"You would be good at issuing orders. Perhaps Lance Corporal is just the first jump of many."
At this, Natalie made a face, shaking her head.
"I get these skills from 18 years of being a civilian," she grinned. "I travelled a lot on Earth – the benefits of living in Europe is the ability to hop on a train and go to any number of countries within a few hours. I've planned many trips and navigated many foreign cities. Military orders are a whole other bag and you know it. I've heard Myles talk of it often enough. Just makes me want to off myself." Rolling her eyes, she raised her pointer finger to her temple, making the disturbing gesture of shooting herself.
"Stop that," John snapped.
She dropped her hand to her lap as if she'd been scalded, staring at him with surprise.
"I'm sorry.. I…"
"I didn't mean to sound angry," he cut her off, his tone softening once again. "I just don't want to imagine something awful happening to you."
"Oh, John," she sighed, reaching up and placing a hand on his cheek, caressing his skin with her thumb. "I've had plenty of awful things happen to me." For a brief moment, a memory flashed into her head of that night in the bathroom stall, curled up in pain, losing the life that had been growing inside her. "I would've been dead at least twice over, if it weren't for you."
"If I could, I would be with you constantly, so I could always protect you. I know I cannot be, and I don't think I recall having a fact bother me as much as that does. As a Spartan, you must know that I can never fully be yours. But I will give you as much of myself as I can, for as long as I can, and that I promise."
The words were raw and full of caring, in the best way he knew how to communicate it. Natalie bit her lip, feeling emotions bubbling up inside her.
"I know," she assured him, and the words "I love you" came and froze on her tongue. Quickly, she leaned in and kissed him, savouring the taste of his lips as she felt tears welling in the corner of her eyes. As she pulled back, she turned and stood, crossing the room to her duffel bag, blinking away the surge of emotion. When she faced him again, she was all smiles as she hoisted the bag over her shoulder, which looked huge compared to her lean frame.
"Let's check out and start our adventure, shall we?"
They got their rental car without issue – John let Natalie do all the talking and the signing. He didn't know the first thing about renting cars – the only vehicles he'd driven were the Warthogs and the troop transports. They climbed into the small black hatchback, John's head almost touching the roof of the car. Even with the seat adjusted fully back, his knees still brushed the steering wheel. Despite Natalie's protests, he assured her he was fine and they headed for their first destination – the base.
John stopped outside of the Senior NCO's quarters, a uniform, three storey building with a UNSC flag waving in front, and seemed relieved when he could get out of the car.
"I'll be back in a minute," he said, and in a few long strides, had disappeared within.
Natalie got out of the car and leaned on the hood, taking out her pack of cigarettes. It looked like it was going to be a beautiful day. Even though it was still early, the sun carried a substantial amount of heat.
She lit her cigarette and sighed with delight upon the first drag. She closed her eyes, enjoying the warmth on her face. Being cooped up on a ship for months had its toll on her skin – she was almost sickly pale.
Glancing up at the entrance, she watched as three figures emerged from the building – two women and one man. The shorter woman, upon closer inspection, she recognized to be Dr. Halsey – this time without her lab coat. She wore a pink blouse, beige pencil skirt and low wedged heels. Her black hair was swept up into a chignon, glasses perched on the end of her nose. The man and the other woman, dressed in PT strip, were large and well-built to such perfection that Natalie suddenly realized she was staring at two other Spartans.
Not having yet been noticed, Natalie watched them converse for a few moments, studying the two Spartans. The woman had short, vibrantly red hair – a shade that made Amy's appear dull. Her face reminded Natalie of a pixie. She was shorter than John, but still unusually tall for a woman. The man standing next to her had dark hair and unremarkable features – nothing really stood out about him, even his height. Still tall for a man, he was no-where near John's height of 6'10". To an inexperienced eye, he looked like he could easily blend into a crowd unnoticed.
The two Spartans said something final to Dr. Halsey, nodding, and then took off in a flash, hurrying down the steps and breaking into a graceful run, headed for the track.
Natalie took the last final puffs off her cigarette, snuffing it out on the bottom of her shoe as Dr. Halsey headed down the steps toward her.
"Doctor!" she called.
Halsey, who'd been glancing down at her data pad, looked up sharply – confusion visible on her face for a moment until she recognized her.
"Oh, Natalie!" she smiled warmly, coming up to the car. "I was wondering if I would see you. I take it John found you alright?"
"Yes, it didn't take him long. He told me of the arrangements, and I want to thank you."
"It's the least I could do." Dr. Halsey gave her a knowing look. "I know you won't be here on Reach for long."
"No. Literally every minute counts. John's just in grabbing a few things from his shacks. We're going to spend a night at a lodge up in the mountains, not far from the city. I rented us a car so that if he's needed back, we're not stuck waiting on a taxi." Natalie glanced back in the direction the two Spartans had run. "They are John's fellow Spartans, aren't they?"
"You have a very observant eye. Yes, that was Linda and Frederic – members of John's team. He deploys with them frequently."
"Seeing them gives me comfort that he'll be safe on any future endeavours."
"I don't know if Spartans know the meaning of safe," Dr. Halsey replied with a gentle laugh. "But, yes, they are the best-trained soldiers the UNSC has to offer."
"I know I shouldn't worry about him, but I do," Natalie admitted. "I've seen enough of Master Chief in action – he' s always in the thick of it. I know he's likely done and seen things that would make my experiences look like a cake walk."
"You're not wrong. We send in the Spartans on missions that would be nothing but a bloodbath for Marines. That's what most don't understand. If we sent Marines into the level of conflict that our Spartans deal with – I would have no doubt that the casualty rates would top 90 percent."
"Fuck," Natalie exhaled deeply. "At least John seems to have luck on his side."
"God knows where he gets it from, but he is like a cat with his nine lives. There have been plenty of times over the years, I was sure we'd lost him – but he would show up, beaten and battered with his suit barely functioning, chirping off some cynical remark as if it had been a training exercise."
"Hell, I've known him a matter of months and I've witnessed that myself." Natalie smirked. "I mentioned before that he saved my life. Did he ever tell you about the Pelican incident on Lacerta?"
Dr. Halsey's expression grew weary, giving her a small shake of her head. By the end of the story, the doctor was surprisingly laughing. If Natalie looked closely, she was certain the new look on Halsey's face was one of pride. The more she talked to her, the more she saw her as the Spartan Mom. It was clear that Halsey cared deeply for each of her Spartans as if they were her children. Hell, she'd practically raised them, hadn't she?
Natalie glanced past the Doctor, spotting John standing at the top of the steps just outside the entrance, watching them. He'd changed into the only clothing he owned that wasn't a uniform – his PT strip – a grey t-shirt and sweatpants. His duffle bag was in one hand – by the looks of it, it looked to contain not much other than his ablutions kit.
"John!" Natalie gestured with her head for him to come over.
"I won't keep you any longer," Dr. Halsey said as John approached. "You're in good hands."
"I know," John and Natalie blurted at the same time.
Halsey laughed heartily as they looked at each other in surprise.
"I'll keep him safe, Doctor," Natalie flexed a bicep in good humour, winking.
At this, John raised a brow in doubt.
"What exactly do you think you're going to keep me safe from?" A small smile played on his lips.
"Umm…"
"Exactly," John said, looking to Dr. Halsey. "I'll keep her safe, ma'am. There'll be no one AWOL, I promise."
"Good," Dr. Halsey replied. Seeing John and Natalie interact warmed her heart. It was clear to her that they were deeply attracted to one another – John exhibited a genuine tenderness of which she never thought him capable. And Natalie… the young woman's eyes lit up like Christmas as soon as she saw him.
They said their goodbyes and she watched as they got into the car. Natalie gestured for John to go to the passenger's side, making a comment about leg room. It was quite the sight seeing such a large man squeeze into such a small vehicle – but he made it, closing the door behind him with a thud. Windows up, A/C likely cranked, they were no longer audible. With an ecstatic grin on her face, Natalie turned and said something to John, who responded with a gap-toothed grin so genuine that it made Halsey get chills. Memories came back to her then, of meeting John for the first time. The tall, freckled 6 year old had greeted her with that same grin. Oh, that damned fateful day on the playground on Eridanus II. She'd sealed his fate and robbed him of a normal life. Once John had become a Spartan, she'd never expected to see that boyish grin again. But here it was.
She watched them as they pulled out of the drive and sped away with a squeal of tires. Natalie's heavy foot clearly came from driving Warthogs. John's driving technique, she realized, likely would not be any better. As long as they didn't attract the attention of the MPs on their way out, they'd be fine.
Dr. Halsey heaved a sigh, watching the car disappear out of view. John's meeting Natalie could be viewed as both a blessing and a curse. She gave him a taste of a genuine, human existence, but it would always just be a taste – the full experience would forever be out of reach.
John was a Spartan, and a Spartan he would be - until the day came that his luck finally ran out.
She could only hope Natalie understood that.
It was an interesting drive to the lodge. It seemed the moment they had left the base behind, John found himself getting a glimpse of a side of Natalie he hadn't seen before. This Natalie was free-spirited and bubbly – if not a little reckless. She never seemed to stop smiling. A fan of speed, she drove in the outer lanes, passing other cars in a blur. The radio was on, playing music John had never heard, but was agreeably better than what he'd endured last night at the club.
"Fuck!" Natalie exclaimed with enthusiasm. "I love this! Isn't this great? No fucking uniforms, no recycled air, no 'Yes, Sir, no Sir, three bags full, Sir!' We're free, John. For a day. Free."
John pondered her words.
"Yes," he agreed after a moment. "It seems surreal to me."
"You've never done anything like this, have you?" Natalie glanced over to him.
"No," John replied. "I have not. I doubt I ever will again."
This made Natalie's throat constrict.
"Don't say that," she tried to smile. "I know you tend to favour being cynical, but come on, John. Can't Spartans have hopes?"
"I hope you stay safe. I hope my fellow Spartans stay safe. I hope what I'm doing is making a difference. And I hope we win this fucking war," he said matter-of-factly. Much to her surprise, he finished with a growly "Ooo-rrrahh!"
Natalie laughed.
"Oo-rah, indeed."
Their lodge was beautiful – an A-frame log cabin, complete with a fire pit and two deck chairs out front. The brochure hadn't lied about the scenery. From the front deck, they looked down on the city of New Alexandria, and the large mountain range seemed to circle it – peaks could be seen as far as the eye could see.
They disposed of their duffle bags inside, quickly doing a walk around the cozy interior. It consisted of consisted of a small kitchen, sitting room, bedroom, bath, and luckily for John, vaulted ceilings. Large windows provided a view of the mountains from within. John was speechless, Natalie guessed from awe.
Exploring done, they went back out onto the deck, both equally drawn to the view.
"Is this like Germany?" John spoke finally, looking down at Natalie.
"Yes," she breathed. Her heart ached suddenly for home, remembering the taste her Oma's freshly baked apfel strudel. Normally, she tried her best to forget such memories, but the fresh mountain air filling her lungs overwhelmed her to nostalgia.
"Good," John nodded. "I'm glad." A thoughtful pause. "You got to grow up in a beautiful place."
"Yes," she sighed wistfully. "Do you remember much of where you grew up? Before you joined the Spartan program?"
"No, but it's probably for the best," John said. "Can't miss what you don't remember."
"I suppose," Natalie felt sad for him. She wondered what happened to his family. How did John get chosen for the Spartan program? Did his parents willingly allow their child to participate in such a thing? Perhaps, he was an orphan? Maybe Dr. Halsey adopted all the future Spartan children? These were questions she knew she'd never know the answers to. The Spartan program was classified, a secret to all but the Spartans themselves, Halsey, and whoever she had in her employ.
John wrapped a large arm around her, pulling her against him so her cheek rested against his chest. She closed her eyes, inhaling the smell of him, listening to the steady rhythm of his heart. She felt her muscles relaxing, months of stress slowly starting to slide from her shoulders. She sighed again, although this time in contentment.
"Natalie?" John said softly, her name sounding sweet on his tongue.
"John?" She looked up at him.
"What does love feel like?"
Not expecting such a question, Natalie took a moment to find her voice.
"I don't think I've ever had someone ask me that," she said thoughtfully. "What does love feel like? Hmm. Like heaven; like hell. It changes who you are, it changes how you think. When you love someone, it fills you up inside – so much that sometimes it feels like your heart is going to burst. You think about them all the time, the time you spend apart seems like an eternity and you're always longing to see them, to hear their voice, to touch them…"
With a swift movement, John had her up in his arms. His face was inches from hers, and he seemed to be holding his breath. She recognized his expression – it was one of relation.
"Go on," he said softly.
"When you love someone," Natalie continued, her mouth feeling dry. "You'd move mountains for them. You strive to do everything in your power to protect them and make them happy. Seeing them happy makes you happy. And a lot of the time, when you're in love, you feel like a fucking fool."
John was silent for a few moments, absorbing her words.
"I've never moved a mountain," he declared at last, turning and carrying her inside toward the bedroom. "But for you, I'd try."
A/N: I apologize for the lengthy hiatus. I was not in a good place for a while, but the tides are turning and I'm getting my creative streak back. There will be more frequent updates to look forward to in the future. Hope you enjoy. – AB.