The screen lights up and shows our fabulous host with his signature smug grin standing on the dock of Camp Wawanakwa. The cameras zoom in on him.

Chris: Yo, what's up everybody. I'm Chris McLean coming at ya live from Camp Wawanakwa, a dinky campsite on an island somewhere in Muskoka, Ontario. Here, we'll be filming the next big hit for reality tv across the world, Total Drama Island. Not long from now, 22 campers will arrive and be divided into two teams. Each team will have to face ridiculous challenges that I made up and try to ensure their safety for the night. When a team loses a challenge, they will be brought here.

Chris stands in front of the campfire area.

Chris: The dramatic campfire ceremony, where they will have to vote "anonymously" to give one of their teammates the boot. Everyone but the big loser will receive a marshmallow before watching their teammate walk the dock of shame to board the boat of losers and never return to the island. EVER. At the end of the show, there will only be one camper left and they will win one. Million. DOLLARS. They'll have to survive the wilderness, the disgusting camp food, and most importantly, each other if they want a shot at the money. Who will show up? What will happen? Who will win? Find out on Total...Drama...Island!

The camera fades back in after the intro with Chris waiting on the dock again, looking off into the horizon.

Chris: Any moment now, our campers will show up, and look, here comes one now!

A nice boat speeds up to the dock and Harriett hops off, staring everywhere in amazement as her enormous backpack seems like its ready to burst.

Chris: Aloha, Harriett. Welcome to the island.

Harriett: It's even prettier than I imagined! Ooo, I can't wait to see what horrible disasters are gonna strike this place. I have to start prepping for them right away. There's definitely gonna be whirlpools and tsunamis for sure, gonna have to be ready for that. And-

Chris: Alright, we get it. Why don't you just think that stuff over there, while I greet the other campers.

Chris points to the other end of the dock as Harriett, offended, walks over to it. The next boat rolls up and Lukas steps off with a dry erase board and marker.

Chris: Ah, Lukas, my man. Great to see you.

Chris gives Lukas a high five, but then the latter looks around and appears confused. He writes on his board.

Lukas: "This is it?"

Chris: Sure is, buddy. Why don't you hop over there with Harriett while everyone else arrives?

Lukas walks over to the other end and warmly smiles and waves at Harriett as the third boat arrives with Gene in tow. He gently gets off the boat, so as to not get any of his luggage wet.

Chris: Geeeeene, what's up, dude?

Gene: Just worrying about getting all my tech destroyed by these waters. Could this dock have been any less secure?

He joins the group and, upon seeing Harriett, is taken aback.

Gene: Oh my, uh I'm Gene. N-nice to meet you two.

Harriett: What's a matter there? Cat got your tongue? I got just the thing in my bag, just let me dig around in here.

She sets her bag down and begins to search through it as Lukas writes "Hello" to Gene. Another boat arrives, this one with Bobby aboard. He slowly climbs and calmly walks up to Chris.

Chris: Ay, Bobby! Looking..."fresh."

Bobby: Thanks homie, I don't try that hard for it honestly. Ayyyy, there's a tech master over there, what's good, bro?

Bobby walks to the others and fist bumps Gene. Gene seems thrilled that there is someone else who is interested in technology among the campers. Another boat shows up carrying Peggy, who is twiddling her fingers. She gets off and shyly walks towards Chris.

Chris: You must be Peggy, welcome aboard.

Peggy: Uh, thanks.

She blushes and quickly shies away from the interaction and stands a few feet away from the other campers, who all look at her in confusion, except for Harriett, who is still digging. The sixth boat arrives and Duke is standing at the top blasting hard rock music. He leaps off and does an entrance dance as he walks up the dock.

Chris: And his name is DUUUUUUKE! Haha, how's it going champ?

Duke: The champ is confused as to why we are on a garbage island when the one advertised was a five star resort. What gives?

Duke walks to the others, getting to close to Peggy, who steps away and falls into the water. Lukas runs over to help her up as Chris snickers at the hilarity. Once she gets back onto the dock Lukas grabs his board.

Lukas: "Are you alright?"

Peggy: Yes, thank you...um...

Lukas writes his name and she slightly smiles back to him as the next boat arrives with Desiree aboard, who jumps off and interrupts Chris before he even gets to speak.

Desiree: You gotta hear about this, so this bigwig Chris McLean tells us we're gonna be on some fancy schmancy resort for a fancy schmancy tv show but we're at a dump, I mean, what gives?

Chris: Ahem, Chris McLean would be me, Desiree.

Desiree: And?

Chris rolls his eyes as Desiree joins the rest of the campers, seemingly excited to tell them about a million stories, but before she can, the boat with Elicia arrives and she makes a dramatic entrance.

Elicia: Hellloooooooo Chriiiiiiiiiiis!

Chris: Ah, Elicia. Not even here for ten seconds and you're already singing. Great.

She wears a big smile as she joins the others as the next boat arrives with Lyle. He gets off, taking his time to admire the landscape before being greeted.

Chris: Lyle, dude. What's happening?

Lyle: Just taking it all in, man. It sure is beautiful isn't it. Oh, hey everybody!

Lyle joins the group as Harriett finishes digging through her pack.

Harriett: Well, I'll just have to find it when I unpack later, haha.

Another boat pulls in with Josef standing menacingly in the front of it. He takes a big stride of the boat and walks right past Chris before he can even say a word to him.

Josef: You are all to be very wary. You never know when it's going to get you.

Duke: Ain't nobody telling the Dukester what to do. Nobody, no how!

The two butt heads as the next boat arrives with Annalise aboard, who waves to the general public in her beautiful gown.

Gene: Humina humina humina

She walks up to Chris with her pageant winning smile still on.

Chris: Annalise, digging the getup. Totally not a bad call for an island.

Annalise: Thank you so much, it's pretty, isn't it?

She walks to the others, but avoids standing near Duke, Gene, and Bobby. Bobby shrugs and tries to peek inside Gene's bags as another boat shows up, this one with two passengers: Percival and Claudia.

Chris: Here they come, all the way from England. Percival, looking shiny, dude. Claudia, did you just get out of a business meeting?

Percival: Ah, good Chris. I enjoy your jesterly demeanor.

Claudia: If by business meeting you mean Renaissance fair, then yes, yes I did.

Percival looks mildly offended by the comment, but continues on the dock as Claudia quickly joins them. Another boat arrives with Rolf carrying lots of camera equipment. He steps onto the dock and looks infuriated almost immediately.

Rolf: Some five star resort, let's just hope the food doesn't match the scenery.

Chris: Oh, don't you worry Rolf. I'm sure you'll love the food.

Rolf glares at Chris as he joins the group. Desiree recognizes him immediately, but before she can say anything, another boat arrives with Leslie who is jumping for joy so much that the boat is shaking. She leaps onto the dock and runs up to Chris and hugs him.

Leslie: Oh my gosh, I'm so excited! I love you, Chris!

Chris looks really confused as Leslie runs to the others and does a similar song and dance for everybody, bothering Rolf, who dusts his shirt off afterwards. Another boat arrives, with Evander. He jumps onto the dock and glances at everybody. A couple of the girls see him and blush while the guys look almost envious.

Chris: Evander, looking cool.

Evander: You know it, ain't a single day I don't look cool. Sup, ladies.

He joins the group while adding more gel to his pompadour, trying to get it to stay up. Shortly after, the next boat arrives and Colleen gets off of it, approaching Chris with a stern look in her eyes.

Colleen: Fix your posture, you're going to have a bad back within the hour if you stand like that. And shave, would you? The five o'clock shadow makes you look like an undesirable.

Chris, incredibly angered by the comment, shakes his head and urges her to join the others. She takes a good look at the groups and mutters to herself while they all look at her in confusion. The next boat then arrives with Francis, who tries to step out but flops onto the dock and conks his noggin. After he shakes it off, he walks up to Chris.

Chris: Yo, Francis, you good there? Looks like your arrival was a little bumpy.

Francis: Haha, I get it. Because I bumped my head.

Francis snorts to himself as he walks to the others, joining Bobby and Gene, who are discussing the latest technology. The next boat arrives and Roxy and Veronica both get off and onto the dock. Veronica is shivering and holding on tightly to Roxy's arm. Roxy, who doesn't seem to mind, winks at everybody else. They all blush as Chris greets the two.

Chris: Veronica, I hope you enjoyed that favor from us, letting you ride with Roxy so you wouldn't be alone at sea, cause that's all you're gonna get. Roxy, looking stellar. Enjoy the ride?

Roxy: It was bearable, though most of the time I couldn't take my eyes off of this one. Poor thing.

Veronica: S-sorry...I thought I was gonna fall in...

The two join the group and Annalise looks annoyed.

Annalise: Excuse me, "Roxy." What's the big idea, stealing my attention like that? Hmph.

Roxy chuckles and blows a raspberry at Annalise, who is taken aback by this and fuming. The next boat arrives with Hellen, who is holding an enormous journal that she is currently writing in. She steps off the boat without even taking her eyes off of the journal.

Chris: Hellen, nice to see you. Whatcha got there?

Hellen: Ah, it's my book of knowledge. Every interesting tidbit I know is kept inside this book. For instance, did you know that starfish have eyes?

Chris: Yeah, sure, whatever. Go hang out with the others, why don't you. I'm sure they'd love to hear that stuff.

Hellen joins the rest as the final boat arrives with Wendell sitting in a creepy manner without moving a muscle. When it stops, he gets off the boat calmly, all the while holding an ominous smile.

Chris: And last, but not least, Wendell. G'day mate!

Wendell: Ah yes, because I'm from Australia. Hardeehar.

Wendell walks past Chris and sees Colleen reading Bobby the riot act.

Chris: Well, since that's all of you, we should get going with the rules.

Chris takes everyone to the campfire area. Many people sit or stand near the wall, while Harriett scavenges around the spot and Lyle admires everything around him.

Chris: So here's the dealio. I'm going to split you into two teams. Every few days, you will compete in challenges against the other team. The team that wins is safe, but the losing team will have to come here and vote off one of their teammates. The teammate that gets voted off will walk the dock of shame and board the boat of losers to never return. That being said, it's time to pick the teams. Annalise, Duke, Gene, Peggy, Elicia, Desiree, Bobby, Josef, Lyle, Lukas, and Harriett. You guys will now be known as the Killer Bass. Wendell, Percival, Veronica, Francis, Claudia, Colleen, Evander, Roxy, Hellen, Rolf, and Leslie. You will be the Screaming Gophers. Each team gets a two-sided cabin, one side for the boys and the other for the girls. Oh, and news flash: someone will be getting eliminated tonight.

Everybody gasps, thinking that the first day wouldn't have had any pressure on it at all. the teams gather together

Chris: Now, now, calm down. Let's take you to your cabins. The west cabin goes to the gophers and the east cabin goes to the bass. You'll get a half an hour to unpack and meet me at the main lodge. Oh and one more thing. The confessional booth, it seems like a regular outhouse, but really, its somewhere to go where you can share your innermost thoughts and secrets.

Wendell (Confessional): Ah, a secret booth where I can share my thoughts, huh. Heheheh...

Gene (Confessional): You know, before this, no girl would really let me speak to them ever. But Harriett did immediately. It was awesome!

Hellen (Confessional): Did you know that Rolf, on this very island, has many food blogs?

Peggy (Confessional): That Lukas kid seems really nice...I mean they're all pretty nice in one way or another but...ah.

Chris: Alright, your time to unpack starts...now!

Chris leaves as the campers go into their cabins respectively.

Duke: The Dukester gets a top bunk, cause I'm the king of the ring, ain't none of you gonna forget it.

Josef: More like the king of arrogance and loud mouth.

Josef (Confessional): I don't much care for the sweaty, buff one. Maybe I won't warn him about his impending doom.

The two butt heads as the other guys on their team start to unpack. Meanwhile, Colleen is bossing the Gopher girls around to no end.

Colleen: Come now, is that any way to unpack your things, Roxanne? At least try to be neat.

Roxy: It's Roxy, thank you. Veronica, you know we're on land. You can let go.

Veronica: O-oh...sorry...I...

Veronica lets go of Roxy's arm and starts to unpack her stuff.

Veronica (Confessional): I have a fear of boats...and of docks...and also campfires...and bunk beds...this is gonna be terrifying...

After a little while, the campers go to the main lodge where they meet Chef Hatchet, who gives a very intimidating speech, scaring the lights out of Veronica. All the while, Wendell keeps smiling. As the campers begin to grab their "food" and sit down, Rolf pipes up.

Rolf: What even is this filth? This can't be the food, right? It can't be...I...

Rolf faints where he stands, ushering in a bit of laughter from the rest of the campers. Chris enters the lodge, and chuckles to himself seeing the campers eat the slop from Chef.

Chris: Hope you guys eat up, you're gonna need because your very first challenge starts in one hour.

Chris leaves the building and the campers mumble among themselves.

Bobby: Haha...I wonder what numero uno is gonna be.

Claudia: It can't be anything too intense, they'd be saving that stuff for the rest of the show.

Evander: They're probably gonna have us play golf or something dumb like that.

The campers laugh, but when the time comes, they find themselves greeted with the enormous cliff over the water, in fear of what's to come.