Scars

by PurpleSkye05

Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy- lifelong enemies or two people more alike than either of them realise? After returning to Hogwarts to complete their final year, Hermione and Draco end up serving detention together. As they get closer they may just discover that the only person in the world who can help them heal is the last person in the world they would ever have suspected.

27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27- Offers

Gryffindors were meant to brave and courageous all the time. It's what everyone said. We were supposed to tackle everything head on without a second thought, because our daring and nerve would see us through any situation. Although it as times like these when I was sure that the sorting hat had made a mistake and I should really have been in Ravenclaw instead. I should have been brave, I should have been able to do this and yet the truth was, which I didn't want to admit, was that I was afraid.

For the last few days I had barely left the common room and when I had I had been surrounded by Harry, Ginny, Neville and even Luna. On the few occasions that I had made it down for meals they hadn't left my side, helping to support me up and down the stairs. Only once had Harry let Draco help me back up to the common room on his own warning him of instant death if he didn't take care of me. Everyone had been really helpful. Even Lavender had been overly nice to me, even if it only lasted for that first day. Everyone that was except Ron. I mean he was there and yet he wasn't. He was always there in the background, always near but he would never actually look at me or speak to me. As much as I may have wanted to speak to him, I just didn't know what to say to him. After all nothing had changed.

Yet that wasn't true. Everything had changed. I loved my friends. I loved that they were there for me and trying to get things back to normal. But things weren't normal. Someone in the place I called my home had hurt me and I didn't know who were they were. They were still roaming around the castle. It could have been anyone. Every face that I passed, every face that I saw, every person in my classes, all of the people in the common room, it could have been any one of them. Someone that I had known for years or a complete stranger? Targeted attack or completely random. I had no way of knowing. No clues. No place to start to try and figure it all out and it terrified me.

Which was why I found myself standing at the entrance to the Gryffindor common room, completely alone, in the early morning, determined that I would step outside by myself. I knew all I had to do was to take that first step. Logically I knew that everything would be fine. It was highly unlikely that my attacker would try again. Yet I had my wand clutched tightly in my hand just in case. I knew that I could wait for Harry or Ginny, but in my heart I needed to do this. I needed to take that first step and not let the fear take over me.

The corridors were still dark, only a faint greyish glow coming through the windows as the winter sun struggled to illuminate the sky through the thick grey clouds that were a permanent feature for winter in the Scottish Highlands. I walked quickly trying to fight my natural instincts to flinch at every sound and every shadow. When I finally reached the great hall I could feel the relief flood through my body. Nothing had happened to me. There was no one waiting in the shadows trying to hurt me. I almost sagged against the wall in relief. I had made it on my own and nothing had happened. I had taken the first step to becoming me again.

The great hall wasn't overly busy as it was still quite early, so I was able to find a quiet spot in the middle of the Gryffindor table where nobody would bother me. I was in the middle of catching up on the transfiguration homework that I had missed when I was in the hospital when the morning post arrived. I looked up as the owls soared and swooped above us all, high in the rafters. I hadn't even realised how late it was and how busy the great hall now was. I never received mail, not anymore anyway, so after my quick cursory glance upwards, I turned my attention back to my reading. That's why I was so surprised when a letter fluttered down gently, landing with a soft thud on top of my freshly buttered toast. I quickly wiped my fingers before I picked it up and brushed the crumbs off of the parchment. The writing on the front looked familiar and as I turned the envelope over in my hands I paused for a moment in confusion as I saw the Hogwarts seal on the back, sealing closed the parchment with crimson red wax. The letter looked remarkably like the one that I had received nearly eight years before. With that memory I recognised the handwriting as the headmistresses.

I swallowed hard and with slightly shaking hands, opened the envelope, all the while dreading what would lay inside. Professor McGonagall wasn't one for writing notes to students and that made me nervous. Pulling out the single piece of parchment inside I read the short message contained within.

Miss Granger

Please report to my office at 9am this morning.

Professor McGonagall

The short message gave me no clue as to what the meeting was about and my mind was working overtime trying to think what I could possibly have done that would warrant a visit to the headmistresses office. I checked my watch. It was just after eight, so I still had over an hour of torturous worrying before I would find out.

I reached down and stuffed the letter into my bag, living by the saying out of sight and out of mind. It wasn't until I sat up that I noticed that change in the people around me. It was a subtle change. The conversations were slightly more hushed and there was a slight aversion of the eyes as people avoided looking at me. However when the young girl across from me was packing up her things, I got my answer. As she tried to hurriedly shove her newspaper into her bag, I caught a glimpse of my own face staring back at me.

Before the girl could even try to stop me, I reached across the table and grabbed the newspaper from her bag with barely a word of apology. She waited expectantly for me to give it back but I just raised my eyebrow at her and shooed her away, not giving her a second glance as she stomped huffily away.

I opened up the newspaper, smoothing out the wrinkles to reveal not only my own face staring back at me but Draco's too. The headline read 'Death Eater Attack at Hogwarts- Hermione Granger Left Critical'. Clearly their reporter was a little behind the times. I didn't even need to read the article to know what it would contain. The picture that they chose of Draco said it all. His cold eyes and his lips curled into an arrogant sneer said more about him than any words contained in their article. It was a look on his face that I unfortunately knew so well and yet it was a look that I hoped I would never see again. It reminded me of a time that I would rather forget. Of the person I would rather forget he had ever been.

Knowing it was better to be prepared I read the article, knowing full well what it would be about. Somehow the prophet knew what happened to me and they had reported it all. Some mysterious insider from Hogwarts had told them everything. Someone who knew every detail of mine and Draco's past. They knew it all. Every fight, every insult. They had every sordid detail. They had dredged up so many details of his past. Of our past. Of every horrible thing that he had ever said and done to me. Of all the times that he had hurt me. When he cursed me in class, when he called me a mudblood, of all the times that he had made fun of me.

It was strange to read about myself in that way. Almost like I was reading about another person. It was only when the words in front of me started to blur that I realised I was crying. Each tear that was falling and blotting the ink of the newspaper a memory of all the times that he had hurt me. I quickly brushed them away in the hope that no one would see me crying and folded the paper away. I had read enough. The moving image on the front of the paper caught my again and I found myself looking at Draco's image, just staring at him, wondering how those cold and hard eyes could belong to the same soft and kind eyes that I felt I knew so well.

I pushed the paper away annoyed. Annoyed that they would dredge up his past again when they didn't know the person that he was now. Annoyed that from reading that article even I was appalled by all the things that he had done. How the article would make everyone believe the worst in him again. The article was full of so many true things that it became hard to dispute the one major inaccuracy. His innocence. People will believe a lie if you wrap it up and sell it with the truth. People would believe that he was guilty this time because of everything that he had done in the past. Everyone would believe that he was guilty and everyone would think that I was a complete idiot for believing him.

I angrily stuffed the paper into my bag and hurried out of the great hall, ignoring the looks from half of the people in the hall who had the Daily Prophet open in front of them. Most of them were pitying looks. Poor girl! What an idiot! Well what did she think was going to happen! She got what she deserved! I wanted to wait for Draco. To show everyone that they were wrong. That they shouldn't believe everything that they read, but I had to go and see Professor McGonagall, really hoping that she wasn't about to make my day much worse.

I arrived breathless and sore from going up so many stairs and when I finally reached the headmistresses office I was only mildly surprised to find that I wasn't the only one that had been summoned to the headmistress's office as both Harry and Ron were standing at the foot of a staircase. It felt familiar, just like old times.

'You got the letter too?' I asked coming up behind them. Harry turned around and greeted me, Ron looked me swiftly up and down before turning away and heading up the stairs without uttering me a word. Harry gave me a sympathetic look but I just shrugged my shoulders trying not to let the hurt show.

'Do either of you know what this is about?'

'Not a clue,' Harry shrugged, 'For once we haven't been skipping classes, roaming the castle at night and basically just disregarding any and all school rules,' he said counting them off on his fingers before he turned to me with a grin, 'At least I haven't. Have you?' he asked teasingly.

'No I'm afraid I've been far too busy recovering from a broken leg, broken ribs and brutal torture to be causing too much trouble these days.' Harry's face immediately dropped and all trace of humour was erased from him face. 'Sorry,' I added hastily, 'bad joke. But I guess that this means that we're not in any trouble for once.'

'Only one way to find out,' he said reaching out and knocking on the door with three shorts raps against the door. The door swung open on its own and the three of us looked at one another trying to decide who would be the first one to go.

Harry gestured with his arm and said, 'after you.' With a sharp glare at him, I pushed past him and into the office, all the while ignoring Ron, muttering, 'so much for brave Gryffindors,' just loud enough for them both to hear.

'Ah Miss Granger. And of course Potter and Weasley,' Professor McGonagall said as we entered her office. She stood inside her office, but she was not alone. Sitting at her desk was a person that we were all too familiar with. We needed no introduction but Professor McGonagall gave us one anyway. 'You all remember Minister Shacklebolt I presume.'

The three of us stood immobile in the entrance of the office, exchanging bewildered glances. Whatever we had expected Professor McGonagall wanted with us, I don't think any of us could have imagined that the Minister for Magic would be involved.

'Well hurry up and take a seat,' Professor McGonagall said to us with an irritated tone. 'The minister doesn't have all day whilst the three of you stand there gawping.'

We shuffled over to the three chairs laid out in front of Professor McGonagall's desk, Harry in the middle separating Ron and I. The Minister for Magic sat opposite, looking at us with his ever calm face, showing no emotion and giving us not one hint of what was to come.

'Thank you for seeing me at such short notice. I'm sorry to be interfering with your lessons especially during your NEWT year.'

To my left I could see Harry and Ron exchange glances that I knew exactly what they meant. They certainly wouldn't be regretting missing double Transfiguration classes.

'As such,' the minister continued, 'I will make this brief. The ministry needs aurors. We have suffered great losses in the last year. Many of our aurors were killed in the last twelve months and from the ones that remain, many do not wish to continue in the profession. Some have seen enough of battles and the others feel that the battle is already won. They have nothing left to fight for.'

He paused for a moment, letting his words sink in. We all waited for him to continue. Waited for him to make his point and let us know why the Minister for Magic would bother to come and tell three Hogwarts students about his staffing problems.

'However I am sure that I do not need to tell the three of you that there is much still to fight for. The battle was won, for many the war was not. Many of the wizards who fought for Voldemort have still not been captured. We want them captured and imprisoned before they are able to reform and cause more problems for the Ministry. We are still vulnerable and even a small rebellion could cause us unknown difficulties. I want the three of you to help us in that fight. Immediately.'

I felt my eyebrows shoot up in surprise and as I looked over at Harry and Ron I saw that my expression was mirrored in theirs.

'I'm sorry, I don't understand,' Harry asked, voicing the very thoughts that were going through my own head.

'You will join the ministry as junior aurors. Due to your previous experience in the field you will need only minimal training before we give you assignments and we will not require you to complete your NEWT exams.'

'Are you serious?' Ron blurted out a look of pure relief and joy on his face.

Kingsley Shacklebolt gave a small smile at Ron and nodded gently.

'I accept,' he said immediately, 'When do we start?'

You would leave Hogwarts by the end of the week and begin your positions on Monday. Although I urge you to think about this offer and perhaps consult with your family first,' he said with a quick glance at Ron. He was a wise man. I would want Molly Weasley's agreement before I gave her son a dangerous job too.

'Of course, I'll go and send her an owl just now. Thanks Minister.' Ron turned and practically ran from the room, his complete happiness clear to see.

I however was having quite a different experience from Ron. From the moment the minister had offered us the jobs I had felt my entire body freeze. The more I thought about what he was offering the more I could feel my pulse and my breathing quicken as the panic spiralled inside me. When Harry stood up and shook the minister's hand, I found myself following his actions, not quite sure what I was doing.

I followed Harry the whole way down the stairs, knowing vaguely that he was speaking but I found I wasn't processing any of the words he was saying to me. Suddenly he stopped in front of me and barely stopped myself from walking into him. He pulled me into a hug that I found myself returning and like someone had turned on the volume, I suddenly heard what he was saying. 'This is going to be brilliant Hermione. I can't believe it. It'll be just like old times with the three of us. I'm going to tell Ginny.'

I stood frozen for a moment, watching Harry as he raced down the corridor, his words still spinning round and round in my head. 'The three of us. Just like old times.' He would accept. Of course he would. It was what he had always wanted. Ron too. It was his dream. It would be the three of us, together again. Just like old times. I could leave Hogwarts. I could work for the ministry for a year or two and then transfer to a department where I could make a difference. I wouldn't have to be looking over my shoulder afraid of the shadows in the corridor anymore. But was that true? Would I simply be jumping out of flames to jump straight into the fire? Living a life where I was constantly fighting, constantly battling, always living in fear, never knowing what was around the corner. That thought, the thought of being an auror and reliving all those moments again didn't fill me with the excitement that I knew Harry and Ron were feeling. But the thought of Harry and Ron leaving me here alone while they moved on with their lives, filled me with an even greater fear.

I checked my watch and realised that there were only twenty minutes left of transfiguration class. What was the point of going anyway if I could be leaving Hogwarts in only a week anyway? I wandered back to the common room and settled down in my favourite spot in front of the fire where I could sit and think. I could have worked on my potions assignment, but then did I even need to complete it? Would I even sit my NEWTS? Would I get the chance to know how well I could have done?

I sat for a long time, going round and round in circles, going from one option to the next and back again. I'd been sitting there for a long time, ignoring the people passing through the common room as my mind worked over time going round and round in circles with no idea what I was going to do. I didn't even care that I was missing classes, I needed some space and time to think. I had completely lost track of time which is why I was so surprised when I was interrupted by Ginny during the lunch break.

'Hey Hermione, what are you doing up here? You alright?' Ginny asked, plonking herself down beside me and putting her feet up the couch. I nodded to her and gave her a small smile in reply. 'Anyway, I guess I should say a big congrats,' she said as she launched herself at me and enveloped me in one of the biggest hugs. 'I can't believe you guys are going to be leaving me here all alone, but I am seriously happy for you.'

'Thanks, I guess,' I answered, kind of disappointed that she knew already. The whole situation didn't feel quite real yet. Other people knowing made it seem more real.

'What's up?' Ginny asked, 'Why are you not more excited about this?'

I thought for a moment, wondering just how much I wanted to admit to her but I figured that I needed someone to talk to and Ginny could give me some advice that I desperately needed.

'I don't know I guess I just…' I started before we were interrupted. My heart literally sank as Lavender Brown came through the portrait hole and headed straight for Ginny and me.

'Hi Ginny, Hermione,' she said, adding my name almost as an afterthought. Lavender and I had never exactly been on the friendliest of terms, yet she was being even frostier with me than usual. To be honest I didn't really care what her problem was. 'I just wanted to say congratulations on making Quidditch captain. You must be so happy.' I looked at Ginny with surprise, giving her a look that said 'why didn't you tell me?'

She just shrugged, as nonchalant as ever and said 'I was getting around to it.' She may have acted like it wasn't a big deal, but I could see the small smile on her lips that was trying to fight its way out. I jumped up and gave her a big hug, just like she had to me only a few moments before.

'Ginny congratulations. That's amazing. I'm so happy for you,' I said with complete sincerity. Quidditch was something that Ginny loved as much as Harry and Ron, if not more. Quidditch was Ginny's way of proving to her brother's that she was one of them, except she had excelled them in every way.

'Thanks Hermione,' she said smiling.

'Well you've got a lot to live up to Ginny,' Lavender interrupted as Ginny and I looked at each other just to make sure we had heard Lavender right, trying to work out if she meant it as an insult or not. 'But I'm sure you'll be fine. Just do us all a favour,' she said her light hearted expression turning darker, 'and beat Slytherin. Put them all back in their place.'

Ginny and I exchanged a brief glance of surprise. Lavender had been through a lot during the war but when she had come back to Hogwarts she had seemed the same girl that she had been before. She had still been the same bubbly, happy and slightly irritating Lavender I'd always known. I'd seen a darker and slightly scarier side to her when Ron had broken up with her, but that was just scary possessive bunny boiler girlfriend. This hatred was completely new. Lavender had never judged people before, she had never hated them before and yet everything in her tone and expression screamed at how much she hated the Slytherins. In certain lights you could still see the faint traced of scars from the werewolf attack. I could understand how that had changed her, how she might want revenge, but I couldn't help think that her hate was directed at the wrong people. It didn't even occur to me that it might be directed at me.

When she caught the look between Ginny and me, Lavender slapped her hand to her mouth in mock remorse. 'Oops, I forgot that you're a Slytherin and death eater sympathiser now. My bad,' she said as she turned on her heel and walked back towards the common room.

'Man I forgot what a bitch that girl can be,' Ginny said, catching my mouth hanging open as I watched Lavender walking away from me. 'Just ignore her, she's just bitter that everyone else is happy and she's not. Anyway,' she said, flicking her hair over her shoulder and turning back to face me, 'what were we talking about before we were interrupted.'

'Em, can't remember,' I lied. In truth I remembered exactly what we were talking about, my dilemma. Yet with Lavender's interruption I'd lost my nerve. I didn't know how to tell Ginny all of the crazy thoughts that were going through my head. 'Anyway, have you eaten yet? How about we go get some lunch and you can tell me all about becoming Quidditch captain.'

During lunch, Ginny had told me all about her plans for the quidditch team while I nodded along politely and pretended to know what she was talking about. It felt weird to think that there was a possibility that I wouldn't be at Hogwarts when all of this happened. When we'd finished our lunch we headed out of the great hall and into the entrance hall. It was so busy with half the people there stopping to chat to friends and the other half trying to fight their way through the crowds to get to their next class.

Just as I was waving goodbye to Ginny, I heard my name being called from behind me. I turned around to see Draco rushing towards me with a concerned expression on his face. 'Hey are you alright?' he asked by way of greeting. Not even giving me a chance to respond he grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side to a quieter spot. 'Did you see the Prophet this morning?'

'I did, but Draco its fine. I know none of its true.'

'Are you sure? I got so worried when you didn't turn up to class. I thought you might be upset.' He said it almost like a question, watching me the whole time as if trying to see if I was really okay.

'No I'm fine honestly. I mean it's annoying but I know none of it's true.' He nodded once and his whole posture relaxed as if he finally accepted that I wasn't freaking out about the Prophet story. 'But about me missing class this morning, I do need to talk to you about something.'

'They are completely out of order,' Draco started, ignoring what I had said. 'Someone must have told them things. My father still knows people at the Prophet. He could force a retraction.'

'Don't you dare! I don't need any favours from your father and I won't have him hurting anyone over some petty gossip.'

'You honestly think that I want that? That I would let my father do that to anyone?'

'Come on Draco we both know your father and the lengths he would go to protect you.' Draco glared daggers at me and I could see a small trace of that familiar sneer, the one that was on the front cover of the newspaper still stuffed in my bag and the one that meant he was incredibly annoyed. 'Look it doesn't matter. It doesn't bother me. And besides the more you protest and argue the more people think you've got something to hide.'

'Fine,' he said folding his arms as he leaned in closer to me, 'but just remember Hermione that someone out there is watching us. Someone out there has already hurt you and could again. Someone is trying to turn the whole wizarding world against us. Who knows what they'll try next.' With those comforting words, Draco stormed away from me, I presumed to his next class leaving me rolling my eyes in frustration at his stubbornness.

After arguing with Draco I really couldn't be bothered going to class so I headed to the one place where I knew I would find the peace and solace that I craved. Ron said all the time that if I ever had a problem then I would immediately head to the library. Even though I was pretty sure I wouldn't find the answer to my dilemma in a book, just being there helped me to think more clearly. I sat in my favourite corner of the library at my favourite table with a view of a lake. Thinking things through was clearly not working for me, so I did the most logical thing. I pulled out a sheet of parchment and made a list of the advantages and disadvantages of each option. I hoped that seeing things clearly in black and white might help me to make my decision.

When I had finished making my list, I put down my quill and flexed my fingers, trying to get rid of the stiffness after an hour of writing. I reached up and stretched my arms, enjoying the satisfying pull of my muscles. Almost as if I sensed he would be there, I turned my head to look behind me and instantly saw Draco barrelling towards me. The smile that had been appearing on my lips instantly died at the expression on his face. To say it was thunderous would be an understatement. If I'd thought he had been in a bad mood before then it was nothing to how he was just now. I'd only left him an hour ago and yet I could hazard a guess about what he had found out in that small space of time. When he reached my table, he flung his bag down with a bang that seemed even louder in the quiet of the library.

'You're leaving.'

Not a question I noticed. A statement. He knew. My insides instantly turned to jelly and I had to swallow down the huge lump of fear that had materialised within my throat. Warily I looked up at him, flinching at the anger that I saw in his features.

'Who told you?' I asked, already fearing the worst.

His lip twitched into the sneer that so easily found its way back to his face and I felt that I was looking at a different person. 'Who do you think?' he snarled at me and I instantly shrank back from him. 'He took great delight in telling me in front of the entire hall that the three of you were leaving at the end of the week to become aurors. Something that I knew absolutely nothing about.'

He paused, looking at me expectantly. Waiting for me to start defending myself. I could have absolutely killed Ron for putting me in this position. Of course it was him. Draco didn't even have to mention his name, but the hate in his voice made it perfectly clear that it could be only one person. He had no right telling anyone, least of all Draco. I already knew that he would have done this deliberately to drive a wedge between Draco and me. I hadn't even figured everything out in my head. All I had wanted was a little bit of time to think things over and once again Ron had forced my hand and made me deal with reality quicker than I wanted. Whilst I was mentally adding 'kill Ron' to my list of things to do, Draco was growing even more impatient and raised his eyebrows to me in question.

'Okay,' I said slowly, trying to buy myself some more time, however there was no escaping the truth and if I had learned anything from being with Draco, it was the importance of honesty. Something that I regretting not being sooner. 'I've been offered a job by the ministry,' I said trying to keep my voice calm and even. Trying to act that it wasn't a big deal. Like it was the sort of thing that happened every day.

'When?' he demanded simply.

'This morning,' I admitted, unable to meet his eye.

'And when exactly were you going to tell me?' he yelled, his voice echoing in the large space. People from tables all around turned around to stare at us and one brave person even shushed Draco. They were a braver person that I was at this moment.

'I don't know,' I replied, trying to keep my voice quiet, 'When I saw you. When I'd figured things out.'

Draco's face changed and a dark glint appeared in his eye. He leaned in closer to me across the table and spoke in a low calm and yet dangerous voice that reminded me so much of his father. Instinctively I shrank away from him. 'You saw me earlier Hermione and you didn't say a word. You left me to look like an idiot to hear it from him of all people.'

'I tried to tell you,' I argued back, 'but you didn't listen. You just got pissy and stormed off before I could tell you, so don't blame me if you then heard it in a way you didn't like.'

Draco just stood there glaring me while I glared back unflinching, trying not to get distracted by the clenching and unclenching of his jaw.

Eventually he took a deep breath in through his nose whilst looking upwards. 'So are you leaving?' he asked.

It took me a moment to answer. A moment for my eyes to well up as I thought about the reality of what it could all mean.

'I don't know,' I replied, giving him the honest answer, even though I knew what it would do to him.

'Well when you figure it out, maybe you could actually let me know. If you think you can manage that.' In the old cliché he sounded not angry but disappointed and that ate at my heart even more.

With that he turned on his heel and marched out of the library, sending a group of third year students scuttling as he scowled at them when they got in his way, leaving me desperately trying to blink back the tears that were forming in my eyes. People all around were trying desperately not to stare and I could see the pity in their glances. Thinking what a poor stupid girl she is for trusting him. I could just imagine to headlines once word got around and the Daily Prophets secret source told them every nitty gritty detail of my life. I couldn't blame Draco though. He had every right to be annoyed with me. I was annoyed with myself for letting this entire situation occur. Time and time again Draco and I spoke about how we had to trust each other and I had once again been too afraid to face the truth. I packed up my things into my bag with deliberately slow actions, trying to make it seem like I wasn't upset and running away.

I ended up going to Arithmancy class that afternoon. It might have been the last class of the day and it did seem a bit silly when I had missed all of the other classes that day, but I needed to take my mind off of everything. I figured I was better sitting in a classroom that sitting by myself and moping. However I couldn't focus on the problems on the boards when I had the biggest problem of all sitting on a list in my bag. Pulling it out I hide it inside my notebook and looked over all my reasons for and against. The list was split fifty, fifty. For every reason for, there was an equally compelling reason against. I would be with Harry and Ron. I would have to leave Draco. I would get to work in the ministry. I would be doing a job I hated.

When the class finished I still hadn't reached a decision so I made my way back to the library hoping that a clear head would help me to think through my options more carefully.

I weaved my way through the wooden bookcases, stopping dead when I saw Draco sitting in my favourite spot, the exact same spot where I had been sitting only a few hours before. Even though he had books and parchment spread all over the table, he was sitting staring out of the window with an expression on his face that I could only describe as brooding. I almost didn't want to interrupt him, but deep down I knew I had to. I had to face him.

'Hey,' I said warily, hoping he wouldn't turn me away. His expression still didn't change as he turned to face me and I was feeling weary at the thought of another argument.

I sat down at the chair opposite from him to stop from feeling like an idiot just hovering by his table. He would barely even look at me, still staring stubbornly out of the window.

'Where have you been?' he asked me, still not meeting my eye.

'I went to class. Why?'

'I was looking for you, I figured this was where you would be.' All I could say was 'oh,' as we lapsed into another awkward silence.

'Look I'm sorry,' I said eventually, when it became clear that he wasn't going to be the one to break the silence. For a moment his eyebrows narrowed and I thought he wasn't going to accept my apology when he shook his head and finally looked me in the eye.

'No I'm sorry Hermione. I shouldn't have acted the way I did. It's just hearing it from Weasley rather than you. He just really pushes all of my buttons,' he said with obvious frustration before he gave a deep sigh, 'But I really am honestly happy for you.'

'No I mean it, I should have told you what had happened. I just didn't want to say anything until I knew what I was going to do. It was a bit of a shock to be honest. I just wanted to get my head straight and think things through before I told anyone.'

'What do you mean till you knew what you were going to do? I thought you had already accepted,' he asked me with a look of confusion that made me want to smile.

'No, I… I'm not sure what I'm going to do. It's a great opportunity, but I'm not sure I'm ready to leave Hogwarts.'

He leaned back in seat, taking in and processing my words. A few times I thought he was going to speak. That he was going to tell me what he thought but no, he was going to make me ask his first.

'What do you think I should do?' I asked, desperate to hear his opinion, hoping he could help me to make sense of all the thoughts running around my head. I could tell he was thinking carefully about what to say, but as ever his face was a mask of stone, making it impossible to work out.

'It doesn't matter what I think.'

'Of course it matters. I really want your advice.'

'I hardly think I can be counted on to be impartial,' he said with a small smirk. 'Look you need to do what's right for you. Stop being logical for once, making lists of the pros and cons. This is the rest of your life you're talking about. For the first time in years, this decision isn't about Potter or Weasley. It's about you. You already know the answer. Just stop thinking so much and go with your gut,' he said standing up and putting all of things away with a quick swish of his wand. 'Just, I don't know, take some time to think Hermione.' He looked at me deeply for a moment before making a slight move as if he was going to walk away. At the last moment he swooped down and captured my lips with his in a kiss that was both fierce and surprisingly tender at the same time. The second I started to respond, he pulled away, turning away from me as if nothing had happened. The same couldn't be said for me as I struggled to catch my breath. 'I'll see you later,' he said as he walked away from me and left me with even more to think about than before.

Draco had both made things clearer for me and confused them all at the same time. It was becoming an all too common theme with him. I knew what I felt for him and yet ever since I had been with Draco my life had gotten distinctly more complicated. Yet on the one hand what he said struck a chord with me. I had lived my life trying to please others. Don't get me wrong, I was confident and opinionated and I knew my own mind, but I still lived for other people, always thinking of others. My parents wanted a straight A student and it had become so ingrained within me that I was afraid of failure.

Then there was Harry and Ron. They were my friends, my best friends and I loved them both. I would have done anything for them and I had. I had put myself in danger, I had erased my family's memories to go on the run with Harry. I didn't want to sound like I grudged any of that. I didn't. Not for one single second. I would have done it all again on a heartbeat. Yet for the last eight years I had lived and breathed fighting against Voldemort and fighting for Harry. I was tired of fighting. I was tired of living in fear. Becoming an auror would only mean more of the same. It would be an extension of high school. Harry was always the best dueller with a natural instinct for self-defence. My passion had been books and knowledge and helping others. Draco was right, being and auror wasn't where my heart lay. I finally had my answer and for once my heart was talking louder than my head.

I couldn't find Draco to tell him my decision. No matter where I looked he was nowhere to be found. I guessed he was doing what he had promised and given me some space and time to think. Once I had searched everywhere I gave up and headed back to the Gryffindor common room figuring I would sleep on things to confirm my decision and then tell Draco in the morning.

When I went through the portrait hole I found the common room empty except for two familiar faces who were making very good use of the couch. 'Ahem,' I coughed loudly, bursting out laughing as two heads shot up from the couch, one black haired and one bright red.

'You know this castle has over three hundred and fifty known rooms. Could you not have found one that was a little more private?'

'Oh bugger off Hermione,' Ginny said, smoothing down her hair as she sat back against the couch. 'You know I've only got him for a few more days. I've got to make the most of him while I can.'

'Ew Ginny too much detail. I would ask what you've been up today but I think it might be too much for my innocent ears to handle. Where's Ron?'

'Oh he's upstairs packing already,' Harry answered. 'He's rather enthusiastic.'

'If I had to listen to one more conversation about aurors today then I was going to hex one of these two. They have talked about nothing else all day,' Ginny said pointing accusingly at Harry while he just shrugged his shoulders and tried to look innocent.

'Speaking of which, have you owled off your acceptance yet?' Harry asked.

'That's it,' Ginny said, throwing her hands up in air, 'I am going to bed and leaving you two to bore each other with auror chat.'

Once she had reached the top of the stairs and I was sure that she was out of earshot I turned to face Harry, ready to tell him my decision.

'So about my acceptance. I've been doing some thinking. All day actually and I've decided well, not to.'

'Not to what?' Harry asked, a blank look on his face,

I took a deep breath. 'I've decided not to accept the offer,' I said feeling instant relief as I realised that I wasn't regretting my choice.

It took a moment for my words to sink in, but I knew the instant they had for Harry instantly sat up poker straight his eyes wide with shock. 'What! Hermione come on be serious. You can't actually be thinking about turning an offer like this down. It's everything we've ever wanted.'

'No it's everything you've always wanted,' I said, 'I want to stay here. I want to finish Hogwarts and get my NEWTS.'

'You can't mean it,' Harry said incredulously, 'You actually want to stay here?' He surveyed me a moment before a flicker of a thought passed over his face and he narrowed his eyes at me in contemplation. 'Hermione I swear to God if you are only doing this because of Draco Malfoy, because you want to stay here with him. What hold does he have over you?'

'Are you for real?' I asked, feeling my annoyance levels rising by the second. ' Harry my decision is absolutely nothing to do with Draco and if you honestly think that I would let a boy influence a decision as important as my future then you clearly don't know me as well as you think you do.'

Harry met my angry gaze for a moment, taking in my outraged expression as if he was trying to work out if he believed me. Clearly he did. 'Fine, it's not about Malfoy,' he finally conceded. 'But that doesn't explain why you would walk away from this. It's such a good opportunity. You could do it for a year or two and then transfer to another department.'

'Harry,' I sighed, hoping I could make him understand, 'I can't,' I said simply.

'Hermione just think about it.'

'Harry, no I…'

'Why the hell not?' he argued back, getting more and more annoyed by my refusal.

'Because I can't,' I said bluntly, 'I can't do it. Harry I can't fight anymore. I can't do it. I don't want to do it. I can't go through all of that again.'

'Hermione what are you talking about? I think that you've more than proved that you can duel.'

'I know I can do it, I just don't want to. I can't be scared every minute of the day again. Wondering if today will be the day someone finds us. Scared to close my eyes in case I never wake up.'

'Hermione it wouldn't be that way,' he said more gently, the traces of anger all gone, replaced instead with a hint of genuine understanding. 'There would be more of us and the danger wouldn't be as bad. Besides you'd still get to go home at night. You wouldn't have to share a tent with me again,' he said, giving me a small smile, 'I promise.'

I smiled back at him at the memories, but it was a remorseful smile as I knew that for one of the first times in my life, I was going to let Harry down. 'Harry I had to do it before. I didn't have a choice. This time I do and I'm saying no.'

'Hermione you always had a choice. I never forced you to come with me.' I could tell that I was hurting Harry and I was truly sorry for it but I had to make him understand. I never had and never would blame him for all that happened to us but the time had come for us to part ways and follow our own paths.

'No you didn't, but that didn't mean I could walk away. I would never have done that to you. I'm not blaming you Harry, not for a second, but I was in it as much as you. I'm your friend and you needed me and I didn't think about leaving you alone for a single second. But Harry you don't need me anymore.'

I could see the change in his eyes. He was beginning to understand and finally accept what I was telling him.

'Hermione, I will always need you. You are one of the smartest people I know and you're my best friend. What will I do without you?'

'You'll be you. Smart and brilliant you.'

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A/N- Again thanks to everyone who is reading. If you like what you've read then please favourite and if you want notified when a new chapter is posted, then please follow. I would also love for you to review. I'm going to respond to some reviews here, because I don't want people to think that I don't read, them, because they do and your kind words mean a lot.

PhoebeMyring- Thanks. I'm glad you like the way I've written Draco. It's tough to try and make Draco still Draco but have him be someone that Hermione would still want to be with. And yes, Dumbledore made a reappearance in the last chapter and he was really difficult to write. Probably the hardest character so far.

RebelVale- Don't worry I'll definitely see this story through to the end and even though support had been a bit up and down, I appreciate each and every person who takes the time to review, so thank you.

Ravenpuff22- Thanks. I'm glad you are enjoying it and thanks for reviewing.

DelightfulSerf98- Again, thanks for reviewing and I'm glad that you enjoyed the chapter.

2704- Well you'll have to keep reading for the answers. Thanks for reviewing and I hope you enjoy what's to come.

Hagridinaponcho- Thanks for the quick reviews. It's great to see that someone is really excited about this story. Sorry but the suspense will be lasting for quite a bit longer. I like to keep you guessing and seeing what everyone's theories are. Again thanks for the review and the lovely comments. I really appreciate the support.

And finally to the guest reviewer. I'm glad that you are enjoying this and appreciate the review.